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The sky forecasted rain for a second and it fell the next. It would surely leave, as quickly as it came. Running on his own, there was not much he could do to arrive home in time. So, to the nearest shelter he hid. And there, he met up with me.
Brown, small eyes were set on the darkened sky. He looked lost and concerned, something all too familiar in his expressions, I would recall. It was as if he had something important to do, but the rain had cursed him to stay put. But, to me, it had been but a small blessing.
“Did you forget your umbrella, Furihata-kun?” I asked, a small smile naturally formed out of the newfound kindness. The moment he heard my voice, his semblance and body language changed drastically. Instead of a steady sway, he was now shaking all over and his eyes managed to glance at me for a second before turning back away to the pouring rain. A delayed nod ensued, prompting a scoff from me.
“Ah, I usually bring my umbrella with me, yet today was the exception.” But I would not mention that it was on purpose. I knew rain was to come but the lack of an umbrella gave me a chance to indulge in something new. Whether I was to pause the world and wait, or rush in the downpour, without a concern of the effects that would come with it. I did not expect to find that boy once again, but I recalled hoping for something similar.
What a simple man and, yet, what an intriguing presence.
Unable to keep my eyes away from him, I stared on at the way he shook, the way he stared at the sky as if begging for the moment to end. …Or maybe he wished for something else. Eyes closing just a little further, I noticed it. He wasn’t just shaking because of me, but…
“Do you mind if we drop by a café that happens to be near here? I was planning to go buy some coffee there before the rain dropped. Maybe, it could help you warm up a little. You will not regret trying it, I assure you.”
“Ah! The café with the jasmines in front? I go there often!”
“Huh? Oh… So, you’re also a regular? I never would’ve guessed…” I certainly never would’ve. A small coincidence, but somehow it rang a little more special than that. He recognized the flowers; he probably liked a couple of drinks and treats. “Well, then. That makes things easier. Here…” I offered my one of my hands to him and he glanced it as if it were the ultimate gift and he, an undeserving receiver. He hesitated, but I shook my hand a little more, prompting for him to hurry and, in a forced manner, he placed his hand on mine and I gripped it tight before it was too late.
“What are you p-planning to do, Akashi-san?” he asked, unsure of what the handholding could mean. Of course, we’re not close, not even close to the term. And yet, here I am, holding his hand and staring for a while too long. It has been like this ever since the start. Surprisingly, he never noticed, but whenever he is around, directly on my point of view, I cannot help but stare back. It comes naturally and I fail to contain my habits.
“Ah, right. We’re going to run through it. Through the rain to the café. It’s not that far, after all. We can make it in less than 5 minutes if we run.” I inform, to which Kouki shakes a little further. It didn’t seem like he wanted to say no, but to my step, he fails to respond, and he just stares back at me now. What is it, then? “Do you refuse, Furihata-kun?”
The prompt comes like a scolding, or that’s what he reflects with the little panicked jolt. If only I could maintain a more relaxed semblance, maybe he wouldn’t take it the wrong way. So, I try just that, soften your features… show him you mean no harm. But no matter how much I try to keep a gentler expression, his bewilderment doesn’t change. Ah, this is concerning. Maybe my social skills are much worse than I thought.
“I… I accept, but… if we run like this, we won’t be able to enter the café, right?”
“Ah, do not worry, I’ll make sure that, at least you can enter.” Because he needed the warmth more than I did.
“Huh?” he asks, but I believe my wording had been clear enough, so I remain quiet and stare on. I know what he can see, the flashes between red and yellow, because I am unsure, because I feel maybe that I need some kind of protection from this new predicament I have exposed myself to. It is alright, do you hear? Everything is under control, no need to enforce control. “That’s… alright, then. I accept, Akashi-san. W-Whenever you’re ready, we can go.” There goes a wavering smile.
And it brings a small bud of joy to me. Strange, how small gestures can make me feel much more than what I had felt in years. Does that boy know the power he holds? Does he even think he has power at all? Once again, it is the delay in my reactions that causes the boy to change his expression to slight confusion, prompting me to nod. The bag over my side, half-open in an attempt to emphasize imperfections, holds a towel that I manage to bring out and drape over the other’s head and shoulders. Then, with a tight grip to his much softer hand, I pull and rush to the rain, no time to stare at the protected face of the other, though I felt the need to do so.
Out of the grip of his eyes staring at mine – or rather trying to – I am able to face the pouring rain and, somehow, the touch of it is so soft that it falls soothingly over without a bother. A baptism? Being reborn? Or maybe, the grip of the hand I am holding keeps every other sensation so tame that I can barely acknowledge it? Tip-tap on the puddles formed by the rain, from the street to the sidewalk. In this dim day, we ran together, and he didn’t say a word, but I catch a glimpse of his eyes looking at me, instead of the road to take. He runs a bit more clumsily, much truer to his humanity. But though we are opposites in this very moment, he doesn’t seem fazed by it. He had been shaking seconds ago, but now, he was determined to run down the rain, protected by a small shelter I had designed just for him. It could’ve been better, much more symmetrical. But it wasn’t and it wouldn’t be and that was… fine.
He made it work. It was only him the one to make it function, to make it tolerable. By myself, it was especially hard to try and break from that constant grip and demand. Inside the darkness of my head, even the guard defensively overlooking could take a more relaxed stance when in front of this breath of fresh air. Odd, wasn’t it or rather, isn’t it? To feel relief in the possibility of actually failing. You don’t like it and I admit, I do not either, but right now… I do not mind, I welcome it. We welcome it.
“Is it always this pleasant?”
“H-Huh? What is, Akashi-san?”
“To feel the very same thing that thwarted your plans form a new one. It is not absolute, and it can be destroyed again, but there is a subtle thrill that encourages to keep going. Is it always like this? In your world… is it like this?”
He pauses and his steps describe a story to me that I fail to comprehend. I feel a faint sharp air escape him, was it a chuckle?
“Not always. It is just like a roulette. Sometimes, it feels satisfactory, but sometimes it crushes you. This rain, I-I think can be interpreted in many ways, but if Akashi-san is feeling what he just described… then I think this rain is objectively beautiful today.” It wasn’t often that an emperor stepped to run in the rain, holding the hand of a peasant that had nothing going on for him but the fact that he was ordinary which, in normal circumstances, meant nothing.
My steps do hinder as I feel that shake on my own gripping fingers. He notices, in the gasp preparatory to an interjection, that I am quick to interrupt and rub away, pointing with my free hand at the café.
Dripping wet, and relatively dry, we contrast each other as we always have. The strands of hair that I usually cut away, now bothering my eyes if even a little. Oh, I do not like this, I cannot see him as clearly as I would desire. But, he is right there and he speaks.
“Ah, the café! We are here!” he keeps the question to himself and I silently thank whatever force prompted this change in course.
“Yes. Dry your arms and legs before you enter. I will wait there, on the empty seats by the garden.” The small garden designed by the owners of the café. Come to think of it, I hadn’t really paid mind to it before. Right now, its colors are vibrant, because there is nothing too special in it, especially with the dim lighting of this day and the dripping rain scattering weak petals mercilessly.
“Oh, yes!” he answers, as if it were an order. Ah, right, how forceful of me. I glance over and he is quickly drying the clothing covering his arms and legs, so fast that it feels he has mentalized a time limit to give back that dripping towel. “Akashi-san, what type of coffee do you prefer to buy? Uh- I mean! What type of coffee do you wish to buy today?”
“Black coffee is alright for today. I’m interested in your type, Furihata-kun. Which one will you take?”
“Ah- w-well… A mocha…” he admits, cheeks bursting in color. Is it something to feel ashamed of? Or is that expression something else? The more I see of him, the more I know that I am unable to comprehend others well. The future is not as uncertain as the boy standing in front of me. Unable to shake all of the droplets away, he shakes his hair slightly and hands over the towel back to me… to then pull it back to himself. “S-Sorry! It’s too soaked to hand back. I will take it home, wash it and give it to you, o-or tell Kuroko-kun to give it back to you, of course!”
“That’s not necessa-” but he runs into the café, towel wrapped up in hand, shoved into a small bag. Sigh. He rushes into the establishment and I’m left outside to gaze at brown hairs waiting in line. Unsure of how many minutes passed by with my stunned expression towards the inside, the ringing of someone else entering brings me back to a tenuous world and I take the seat of the table I had pointed at. The flowers gaze back at me, they sway, and they call.
Inside the store, Furihata’s order is coming along well. Being a little further away from the emperor, he felt he could breathe a little better. And somehow, that thought seems to connect with the cashier, who takes the liberty of throwing a little comment at the boy. “Are you and the redhead friends? I had never seen you come here together before. In fact, he always looked so devoid of emotion, not at all like he looks today. I know it is not my place to even ask but, could it be that you befriended him? He looks much brighter today; it must be a good sign. Anyway, your order is ready. Thank you, once again for coming, we hope to see you very soon!”
It catches Furihata off-guard, but his reaction is an overly positive one. He was doing something right, wasn’t he? Or maybe it was just a good day. Regardless of the reason, he had contributed to it just by being there, making conversation with the other was already a step forward. Silly banter or otherwise, Akashi hadn’t looked displeased and glancing towards the outside, he sat in tranquility, staring at the flowers of that orderly garden.
“Here’s your coffee, Akashi-san!” he informs in a spirited manner. He came back. I lift my gaze at him and he has a smile that quickly turns into a panicked expression. What was it, this time? Did I make him uneasy again? A chuckle escapes from me and it brings comfort to him, I suppose, as he takes a seat, placing the cups of coffee on the table. Oh, I was staring. To deflect, I grab onto the coffee on the right and he places his hand on top of me.
“Wait! That one’s mine!” he informs and both of us freeze in time, coming to an understanding of what just happened. It wasn’t as if we hadn’t held hands minutes before in the pouring rain. This sensation felt a little more intimate somehow. The one before was a means to an end, this one was an unprompted, unscripted action and the reaction we gave was pure shock…
And red, complete red. A warm, heart-stopping red rushed right through my head and I think of pulling away, but my fingers push back again. A fool’s mate. And suddenly everything is two. And my head goes at full speed, refusing to stop, all the while glancing at the expression that seems much more calmer than my own. I wonder, did I look like I was panicking? Maybe it seemed as if I had been disrespected? But, he doesn’t back down. It’s on these moments when Kouki shines brightest, putting a front to the predator, taming it at his will if even for the shortest seconds.
“Ah, s-sorry! That was- um… you… you can keep it!”
“No. Of course not. I just… It is alright. Thank you for correcting me.” And my hand slowly moves away, but the warmth keeps spreading and the heart pounding. But there is a front and I am protecting myself yet again, so now he is the one exposed, the one returning to that fidgety attitude.
“You… You should try it some time, Akashi-san. It’s very tasty…” he comments, hoping it can bring us back to the ground. It does.
“Yes. I will, sometime soon. For now, though… would you mind indulging me further? I would like to ask you-”
His eyes break contact from me at the sound of his phone and I fail to hide how displeased it makes me feel. It surges up in a quick wave of rage, but it is alright. He glances back and it is alright, until it isn’t.
“I’m sorry. I can’t… I-I have to go now!” he stands up, avoiding mismatched eye contact. “B-but this was very delightful! Thank you for taking me here and covering me up, Akashi-san! I will have someone return you the towel later!” I stand as well, quick on my feet I manage to grab his arm again, forcing him to turn and glance over. Instead of meeting me first, a purple lilac is presented. “E-Eh?”
“You will make it up to me later, Kouki. I do not like when I am interrupted. We will meet soon, so be prepared, please. I expect no interruptions, next time.” Another demand that he accepts with a careful nod, grabbing the offered flower with his free hand.
“T-Thank you, Akashi-san. I will make it up to you, yes.” He stops and I release him, but instead of leaving, he eyes me one last time, determined. “This was somewhat fun, so I will not pass up another chance to meet again!” Those words are what manage to cause his feet to regain power, rushing away with mocha in hand and lilac in the other. A force gripping over me disappears along with his figure, dodging the different people sheltering from the now sprinkling rain on the sidewalk. I caught myself staring again, until I could no more.
The sky forecasted rain for a second and it fell the next. It would surely leave, as quickly as it came. But it wasn’t rain, was it? It was him… And I wished the forecast would announce him to me tomorrow again.