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Danny watches as Sam eyes Paulina from halfway across the food court, the goth noticeably scowling. Danny sighs, “Sam, for fucks sake”. Sam just huffs at him, crosses her arms, and sticks her nose up in the air. Making Danny sigh again, “what is she even doing all the way over that’s grounds for hating her shallowness?”. Sam huffs again, “doesn’t matter what she’s doing, it’s shallow”. Predictably Sam said that loud enough for damn near everyone to hear, Paulina shouting, “I heard that, you little witch!”.
“You were meant to!”.
Danny thunks his head on the table. The Quartet and the A-listers actually got along these days, well except for Sam and Paulina. Even Danny got along with Dash, and that guy actually broke Danny’s ribs once. So really, the two girls could get the fuck over themselves by now. Danny decides to voice that particular opinion when Kwan drags Paulina and Star over. Danny giving Kwan a greeting wave before gesturing between the two girls, “how ‘bout this, you two kiss and make up?”. Sam smacks him over the head and Paulina sends him a very overacted grossed-out face.
Kwan runs a hand through his hair awkwardly, “eh I wouldn’t push it, Sam did mess up pretty badly”. Sam scowls, “I didn’t mess anything up, little miss pinky princess-”, making gagging motions, “-just cares more about appeasing the mainstream fashion tryhards than actually being a person”.
Danny throws up his hands in exasperation while Paulina snaps, “you cost my family half a million dollars! All because you couldn’t be bothered to dress decently or respectable for one afternoon. Just how selfish can you be?!?”.
“It’s not selfish to refuse to disrespect myself because other people are shallow mindless followers!”.
“Maybe if you actually gave a crap about actually looking good then you’d realise your ‘fashion style’ is what’s disrespectful to everyone including yourself!”.
“Oh don’t you even! Individuality and being your damn self is the goddamn highest form of self-respect. Maybe if you actually had a personality you’d know that”, sneering, “but you don’t”.
“Why you!-”.
Danny proceeds to ignore the bickering girls -they could go on for a solid hour- and instead looks to Kwan, “you know, it sounds like something specific actually happened. So... spill the fucking tea”. Kwan side-eyes the girls and shakes his head to himself, leaning towards Danny and whispering, “well Paulina invited Sam to a gala that was, like, suuuuuper important for her dad, some business deal thing, and Sam showed up in a t-shirt dress and beaten up combat boots. The host guy was pissed because, dude, that is actually insulting. Like come on, right? You show up to a gala in sleepover clothes? No offence, Danny-man, but that’s messed up”.
Danny blinks, yeah Sam would do that. Dressing down to a rich person event to ‘stick it to the man’. “Huh. And what? Rich Money Bags got so offended -which it’s fucking dumb to get offended over someone else’s clothing, like, full fucking offence there- and because she was Paulina’s guest blamed her dad and went ‘no deal’ like a total douche canoe?”. Kwan squints at him, “okay... I guess makes sense you’d defend you friend but it was her fault”, shaking his head, “I mean yeah that’s what happened”. Danny snorts, “oh no it was totally rich asshole's fault for being a pussy bitch offended by people’s clothing. I mean, my folks actually shot a guy in the foot and he still signed a deal with them. And when the G.I.W. called for a deal the whole fam showed in swimming suits, fuck I even went the speedo route for kicks”, tilting his head, “pretty sure I showed up to a gala in garbage bag pants once”.
The girls pause with the arguing, Paulina screwing up her face at Danny, “why would you do that???”. Sam scowls at the girl, “because fuck rich assholes and the mainstream fashion industry”.
“Believing that crap is fine till you cost people money!”.
“Costing the shitty fashion industry is the point!”.
“I’m talking about my family!”.
Danny sighs and shakes his head before smacking the table very hard and going wide-eyed, “that’s it!“, making everyone look at him. Danny smirks around, honestly unnerving Star as he speaks, “obviously this dynamic-”, gesturing between Sam and Paulina, “-ain’t fucking working. Well fuck girls and boys I got the fucking solution of a lifetime”, grinning maliciously which only makes Star lean away from him as he continues, “we go to another gala and show those fuckers how fucking fab you both are as you are and-”, pointing specifically at Paulina, “-invite Mr. Snuffed Your Dad Asshole”.
Paulina crosses her arms and pouts a little, “she’d probably just embarrass my family further”. Sam scowls at her before shrugging, “Vlad won’t give a flying fuck so long as he gets Danny in a suit”. Which earns raised eyebrows from all three A-listers, Star leans slightly towards Danny, “wait Vlad as in Vlad Masters. You know, the Mayor and one of the richest people in the world?”.
Danny nods with a smirk, “he’s my uncle”. Which predictably causes all three A-listers to shriek, “WHAT!”, at him. Danny chuckles and leans back in his seat, “yup. And I’m his specially chosen heir, to one day take over all his companies and acquire all his wealth”. Sam chuckles, “and you make a habit to make him regret ever even meeting you”. Danny smirks with a nod, “yup. Last time he had a gala I went and bleached all his fancy Armenian suits”.
Paulina looks honestly horrified, “why would you do that???”.
“Because it’s funny”, Danny shrugs, “not like the guy needs any more money. He’s a trillionaire after all”, sticking up a finger, “and when you have that much money you can pretty much do whatever you want and people can’t get offended by you wearing a terry cotton robe and gold-lined boxers to a gala”, smirking, “your Mr. Stick Up The Ass would be lucky just to go to one of Vladdie’s ever rare galas”. Sam hums, “well you’d have to convince him to hold it without any side-murder plots going”. Danny waves her off, “oh it’s been two years since he’s used his galas to draw out people he wants dead”.
Kwan blinks at that, “this is heavily implying our mayor actually does that”. Sam and Danny look to the jock and speak in unison, “oh he does”. Danny rolling his wrist, “in fact we meet because he invited my family to a college reunion party that was really just an excuse to try to kill my dad. But we meet, I kicked him in the face a few times and he trapped me in a box and got a guy to hold a knife to my throat. Good times. We’ve been buds ever since”. Sam rolls her eyes, “by ‘buds’ he means passionate enemies that constantly try to ruin each other’s lives”. Danny puts a hand to his chest and looks to Sam with an offended expression, “hey now, I just wanted him to get a cat and stop trying to marry my mom. He’s the one who decided abduction and getting creative with cattle prods is how you’re supposed to treat family”.
“You’re not even related, Danny”.
Kwan glances between Star and Paulina, “I’m not even sure if he’s serious at this point”. Danny looks to the jock, “you bet your knickers I am. But Vladdie listened to me and is now a reformed baddie”. Sam rolls her eyes, “he set all your clothing on fire last week”. Danny shrugs, “eh, it’s reasonable. I died his cat pink with beet juice”; Sam gives him a very unimpressed look at that. Kwan, meanwhile, laughs.
Star shakes her head, “I guess our mayor’s a really weird guy”. Danny snorts, “considering his interest in cloning and ghost animal experimentation, that’s a given”. Everyone gives him weird disgusted looks at that. Sam perks up though, “oh yeah, how is Elle?”. Danny smiles fondly, “still stealing and pranking people, totally gonna make her a number one clone shirt or some shit”. Kwan shakes his head, “your life, man”; earning a smirk from Danny.
Regardless, the A-listers -or more specifically, Paulina- decide to take Danny up on his offer.
Vlad glances up from his paperwork at Danny, who is floating upside down in front of him and had appeared out of thin air, “nice to see you’re getting the hang of teleportation, Daniel”, putting aside his pen, “now did you come here for any particular reason, or?”. Danny snickers, “yes I am very impressive aren’t I?”. Making Vlad give a very sarcastic, “indeed you are”.
Danny nods to himself, “yup. Now how interested do you feel about having a random gala to make an only semi-rich asshole look like a dumbass?”, rolling his wrist, still hanging out upside down, “some Mr. Devin douche knuckle decided to be a dick and not make some deal thing with Paulina’s dad because Sam’s a goth”.
Vlad smirks in that slightly villainous, but not murderous, way, “why very interested, my boy. Rubbing your wealth in lesser peons faces is half the point of a proper gala, especially if your ‘guests’ once snuffed you... or your friends”. Vlad taps his chin before digging into one of his desk drawers, smirking after a bit, pulling out some papers and tapping them, “I knew I recognised that name”, looking to Danny, who’s quirked an eyebrow, “he’s one of the fools I didn’t even have to mess with to make some less than savoury deals with. He’s the type to flaunt his mild wealth and place most of his self-worth and self-confidence on said wealth. Quite the pathetic type, if I say so myself”.
Danny stares at him a little, “you can only say that because you’re so rich that basically everything you do flaunts yours”. Vlad looks far too smug, “exactly”, putting away the papers, “regardless, you’ll need yourself a new suit, and I gather I’ll be splurging on Samantha, Tucker, Valerie, and this Paulina as well”, looking up to Danny, “so you want it with diamonds, emeralds, or rubies perhaps”.
Danny stares at him for a bit and deadpans, “you just love dressing me up, don’t you”. Vlad smirks, “but of course. Though it’s not just for my own amusement, Daniel”, smirk growing, “I could think of no better thing than wearing clothing worth more than his entire business”. Which fine, Danny can’t help smirking at as well, “you may have a point there. Anyway, I’ll totally take emeralds, diamonds are some basic-bitch shit...”.
Paulina holds out her dress with an almost dumbfounded expression, “I can’t believe you actually got the mayor to buy us all clothing, Danny. Also, how the heck is it already in my size?”. Danny chuckles and waves her off, “I wouldn’t question it, Vlad’s creepy that way. Just be glad he doesn’t put spy cameras in your bedroom”; Valerie snaps her fingers and points at Danny. While Paulina’s busy looking disgusted, Tucker looks up to Danny, “why does he even still do that at this point?”. Danny shrugs, “I think it’s just to test if I’ll find them”, smirking, “which I do”.
Mr. Sanchez knocks on the bedroom door, “you kids ready?”, Danny’s the only one that hears him mutter, “I still can’t believe Mayor Masters bought all of us outfits”. Which Danny absolutely snickers over while Paulina shouts back, “just about done, daddy!”, and readjusts her hair some.
Danny smoothes out his white, grey, and dark gray six-piece suit -because of course those were the colours Vlad went with. Duh- and readjusts some of the emerald suit buttons, he doesn’t even know how to pronounce half the shit the suits made out of. His hair is, of course, as unkempt as usual just with the added bonus of smelling like hair paste that just made his hair look even more rough, but intentionally rough. “So, ready to go show some scumbag what’s what”.
Tucker snorts, “that sounds like we’re going to go shank him”, and puts on his ever-present beret, except this one is stitched with goddamn gold because Vlad was extra. The dark green and dark red suit -which is again a six-piece because Vlad is, again, extra- actually suits the techno-geek. The shiny shoes just screamed unnecessary though. “But yes, dude”, and pulls out a diamond-encrusted pen from the box Vlad left him. Quirking an eyebrow, “really?”.
Sam goes and puts the pen in the guy's pocket for him, patting it, “there, now you look like a geek”. Tucker shoves her for that. Her kicking him in the shin with her steel toe boot -even Vlad couldn’t talk her out of those things. He did, however, manage to convince her to wear noticeably expensive New Rock name brand ones- in retaliation. Sam nodding smugly to herself and fluffing out her crimped and teased hair while Tucker holds his leg and hops around on one foot. She was wearing an old-school Victorian gown; Petticoat, corset, and all.
Danny shakes his head at the two, eyeing Tucker some, “oh come on, it doesn’t hurt that much”. Valerie snickering, “yeah I’m sure you take way more of a beating regularly”. Tucker flips her off while she’s busy readjusting the mink Vlad slightly aggressively shoved at her to wear around her shoulders. Honestly, Danny’s fairly sure the guy only did that because Val kept insisting on a plain simple red cocktail dress, even if it was crushed velvet; and then there was the black tights with rubies. Danny’s not even slightly surprised she went with chunky platforms over high heels, can’t run in high heels after all; or easily kick a bitch square in the face.
Paulina meanwhile, was pink on pink on pink, he’s pretty sure even Vlad thought it was too much. Then again Vlad was partial to the gothic look, figures since he was such a vampiric bastard. Paulina was in a pink flowy dress with pink lace trim and dark pink velvet filigree design work; with a bunch of pink flowers in her hair braid. Her getting all dressed up all extremely girly really just made Danny wonder what he had found attractive about her. Since Danny absolutely preferred the more aggressive appearance his three friends tended to rock.
Paulina looks over the four non-A-listers and shakes her head, “you lot clean up surprisingly well”, then glares very pointedly and with disgust at Sam’s shoes. The goth scowls back, “my shoes are worth more than most of your entire outfits. You just don’t want to think so because you’re indoctrinated by mainstream media”. Danny sighs and glares between the two girls, crossing his arms, “no arguing you two. We’re supposed to be making an asshole feel jealous and stupid, not like he’s thankful he opted out of two crazy harpies”. Danny very predictably gets glared at but at least it shuts them up, as everyone walks out to meet up with Paulina’s dad and head to Vlad’s mansion... Vlad’s gala mansion specifically. Fuck that guy was too stupid rich.
Danny, Valerie, and Tucker are quick to fuck off to the food tables, leaving Sam, Paulina, and her father to subtly locate Mr. Fucknugget to not-so-causally flaunt how much better they were than him -even if it was all pretty much fake- before the other three would saunter over to be all ‘oh ho, even their friends are better than you. Eat a dick’ in the guy’s face. Then Vlad could show and call all of them by name and really make the guy look like a fool.
Tucker nudges Danny while shoving a mini beef wellington in his mouth, “ya no, e’s gon font ya”. Danny snickers, “well obviously, Tuck. I think this is literally the first time I’ve come to one of these things dressed properly at all”.
“You wore a dress shirt that one time”.
“Yeah, a dress shirt patterned in plaid with dicks”.
Valerie chokes on her fruity drink, “did you really?”. Danny nods with a smirk, making her shake her head with a smile, “you’re a joke, Danny”. Danny gives her one very smug grin.
Tucker properly swallows his food, “what you wanna bet the two girls are ready to kill each other by now?”. Danny rolls his eyes at the guy, “Tuck, I can see them throwing glares at each other from here. I’m not taking you up on that bet”. Tucker makes exaggerated shushing motions, “well you didn’t need to tell Valerie that”. Valerie rolls her eyes, “I’m not stupid, Tucker”; earning a pout from the techno-geek.
It doesn’t take long for Sam, Paulina, and her dad to spot Mr. Devin, in his overly garishly printed dress shirt and in-your-face window pane gray suit jacket, guy’s blue tartan pants didn’t even goddamn match. Sam can’t help snorting, “that dude is so obviously not really rich”. Paulina hums, “for once we agree”.
The dude apparently really remembered Sam and actually makes a beeline for them, scowling down at the goth, “I’m surprised someone like you was even allowed through the doors”. Sam rolls her eyes very hard at him, “I would say the same about you, seeing as you clearly dress gaudy to make up for not actually being rich”.
“Hmpf, the nerve. And from someone who clearly still doesn’t know how to dress themselves”, looking to Mr. Sanchez, “I don’t know why you still let your daughter hang out with peons, being around the poor will make you poor you know”. Mr. Sanchez looks just vaguely like he wants to punch the guy, even making fists with the veins bulging.
Sam inspects her nails with a condescending hum, “actually, unlike you, I’m one of the ultra-rich; a Manson specifically”, looking to him with a mean grin, “don’t you know? The real rich have their own style and don’t try hard to ‘look’ rich, unlike you”. He scowls, “as if I’d buy such riffraff”, obviously not believing her.
Vlad picks that moment to show his well-groomed mug, “ah Mr. Devin, I see you’ve ran into a few of my more esteemed friends and guests”. Sam rolls her eyes at the man, not about to let him call her his ‘friend’, “I'm Danny’s friend, not his creepy godfathers”. Paulina quirks an eyebrow, “I thought he was his uncle”. Vlad just sighs exaggeratedly while Sam smirks at Paulina, “depends how well they’re getting along”.
Danny decides to butt in with a dramatic floor slide, “eh he’s uncie Vlad today”, glancing to the excessively dressed guy, “I take it you’re Mr. I Don’t Like Rich People If They Wear Black In A Way I Don’t Like, yeah?”. The dude looks like he’s not quite sure what to do with the ridiculously expensively dressed teenager, which was exactly the point. It’s also the only reason he lets Vlad ruffle his hair up, “this here is Daniel, my sole heir”; Danny can see the moment the guy’s brain actually registers Vlad’s comment, the guy noticeably going wide-eyed and gaping slightly before looking supremely kissass towards Danny, semi-jerkily moving to shake Danny’s hand; Danny making said handshaking painfully strong for the guy just for kicks.
Danny throws an arm around a very meanly smirking Sam as he speaks up, “yup! And of course one of my best friends and the sole heir to the Mason family fortune, Sam!”, gesturing behind him, “that beret-wearing foodie stuffing his face with half the table is one of my other best friends, Tucker”. Sam pokes him in the side, “and doesn’t he have some kind of Egyptian fortune ‘cause he’s related to that Pharaoh?”. Danny knows exactly what she’s doing so he nods in agreement, “oh yeah, so easy to forget about that shit”, Danny gestures his two friends over while gesturing at Valerie, “and the girl with the mink’s my last bestie, no offence Paulie”, Paulina waves Danny off daintily -well aware that they were only regular friends and nothing more- while Danny kicks Vlad’s shoe, “she lowkey works for Vladdie here”.
Mr. Devin quirks a cautious eyebrow at Vlad, “you... employ a child”. Vlad scoffs at the man and physically feels like he’s looking down on the man and his stupidity, “I am a man of unusual and effective means. Those who follow the typical rarely succeed”. Danny snickers very meanly over that dig.
Valerie scowls aggressively once she gets over to them, “shove a dick in it. I’ll have you know I’m excellent with a gun”. Paulina looks like she wants to ask Danny if that’s serious, which was reasonable.
Tucker shoves a macaroon into Danny’s mouth, “eat this, it tastes like fish”. Vlad sighs and shakes his head, “that’s because there’s caviar in it, Tucker”. Both Tucker and Danny stick out their tongues at the man while Sam scowls.
Valerie smirks to herself, watching the Devin man looking like he wants to escape from this situation; much like her father would look when he got pretty well forced into these kinds of things thanks to his old boss. She had loved the life of the rich, her father... not so much. Her subtly and casually sneaking around behind the guy, because unlike the rest of the Quartet she had been more genuinely friends with Paulina far before even being tolerant of Sam. Her putting her hands behind her back, mink draping halfway down her arm, and slightly startles the guy, “funny thing, ain’t it”.
Mr. Devin jumps slightly and turns around, clearing his throat, “I can’t say I know what you mean”. Valerie ignores Tucker seemingly slinking off, instead rolling her eyes at Devin, “riiiiiight. Like you don’t recognise the irony of refusing to do business with anyone who so much as even associates with someone you believe to be the ‘lower class’, only for it to turn out that that very child could buy out your entire company without so much as noticing a dip in her wallet”.
The man scoffs though clearly uncomfortable and trying to hide it, maybe even embarrassed, “even if she was a Manson there’s no way her family would leave the money to someone without the sense to dress themselves. Clearly lacks the sense to not blow it all pointlessly or work to acquire wealth successfully herself”, waving the dark-skinned teen off, “she might as well be poor”. The guy was very obviously speaking out of his ass and trying to save face. Eyeing Danny’s hair while scoffing some more, “and I don’t know what Masters sees in the boy”.
Mr. Sanchez scowls and crosses his arms at the guy, “the boy’s the youngest Fenton, heir to the entire FentonWorks company which is the only company other than Dalvco that deals in the ecto-fields and sells ectoplasm related devices. Business-wise? Merging Dalvco and FentonWorks under the same figurehead would put a complete stranglehold on the market”. Devin looks a little startled by that, making Mr. Sanchez grin like the cat who ate the canary.
Vlad leans over sticking up a finger, and cuts in, “oh it is much more than that, I assure you”, side-eyeing Danny, “Daniel is by far the only person I consider to be of equal worth and footing as myself. A fellow king amongst fools”, and glares very pointedly at Mr. Devin. Danny jabs Vlad in the side, “I’ll stab you with a taser in your sleep”. Mr. Devin takes a slight step back from the sheer venom in that comment.
Vlad just grins, “I look forward to it, Daniel”.
Tucker wanders back over, elbowing and snickering at Danny, tilting a box towards him with Danny looking down a it and joining Tucker in snickering. Valerie just tries to keep a straight face as Tucker sneaks around behind the guy and Danny steps in front of him. Danny putting his hands behind his back and sounding more than a little malicious, “you know, I’ve been featured in a few different magazines, even genius magazine. Which normally only features women but I guess I’m just so great they had to make an exception”. Even Vlad rubs his forehead from just how goddamn egotistical that sounded. Danny continues though, “don’t get me started on all the patents I’ve already got under my name”, grinning meanly, “what I’m saying is, your little bullshit goth hatred kinda fucked my two friends friendship, and I’m a creative little bastard with a slight sadistic side for public humiliation”, rolling his hand as the guy looks progressively more concerned and starts sweating, “so now that I’ve gotten the dirt on you, I figured, why not return you to the dirt like a good little worm”, and grins extremely maliciously while grabbing the guy’s tie and slicing it off with a fingernail.
Tucker, meanwhile, yanks open the back of the guy’s pants as he stumbles back and dumps his box full of worms down them. Mr. Devin shrieks and jumps, vigorously shaking out his pants in a state of shock-induced terror. Danny snickers, sticking his hands in his pockets, “wow he even shrieks like a little bitch”. The rest of the gala goers jump and stare at the guy frantically shaking worms out of his pants; moving out of his like he was contagious. Mr. Sanchez and his daughter also look a bit startled and unsure what to do while Vlad and the Quartet are all acting like this is par for the course.
Vlad taking a drink from one of the waiters and sipping it, blatantly savouring Mr. Devin’s humiliation while talking at Danny, “I’m quite impressed by how you made it sound like you were intending to burry him alive or otherwise end him”. Danny snorts, “Of course you would”.
Paulina sidesteps closer to Valerie, the member of the Quartet she was closest with, “so I guess you guys don’t just pull this kind of stuff on your fellow teens, huh? You guys scare me sometimes. Though fine, it’s funny”. Valerie merely smirks while Sam goes and gives Tucker an earful for using worms.
“Well I couldn’t find enough centipedes”.
“That’s not what I mean and you know it”.
Danny snickers, “fuck, centipedes would have been so much better”; earning him a glare from Sam. “What? I wasn’t going to do anything that would kill the poor idiot and catching him naked on national television seemed too difficult to do this time, plus I’d feel bad for all the poor peoples' eyes here who’d have to see that”.
Sam sticks her arms out to the side, “well ya could have dumped dye on him instead or even just glued his shoes to the floor”. Danny waving her off, “oh come on, that’s basic shit, Sam. Unless there’s ectoplasm involved, but I’d rather not get the hospital bill and assault charge if the guy’s shoes came to life and chomped off his feet at the ankles”.
Valerie snickers at the three before glancing back to Paulina, who blinks, “and here I didn’t think he was being serious about being slightly sadistic...”.
Valerie smirks, “just be glad you didn’t give us, Danny especially, time to really plan something wild out”, nudging her, “sure makes you feel better though, huh?”. Paulina blushes some, “maybe. I wouldn’t say I exactly... forgive Sam though”. Valerie shrugs, “eh, don’t really think that was the point”.
“Then what was?”.
“Danny will just take any excuse to dick with someone’s day”.
Paulina blinks and stares a little, “yeah that’s absolutely a little horrifying”. Which just earns the A-lister a mean smirk from the huntress... and Danny; Vlad also looks oddly smug.
While Paulina had a new level of respect, and cautious fear, for the Quartet and some shared good times, her and Sam’s friendship was only slightly improved.
End.
