Work Text:
The wound in his side is not very deep, at least he concludes that from the fact that his intestines are still in their place and not falling out of him, but it still hurts like a bitch while he runs. Namjoon sees black dots in front of his eyes while he runs, courtesy of the blood loss he concludes, but he tries to keep on running even though not only his side, though that’s the most prominent pain out of all of them, but also his lungs and things are on fire.
He’s tired, oh so tired, days and weeks of getting barely any sleep, of coldness and weak prayers to simply survive, because he was so sure he wouldn’t, so sure he’d die, but now he’s here and he’s running and he has to keep on going. He has to keep going.
he has to keep running
There’s a fallen log in his way and while he manages to somehow not stumble over it, it makes his injured side burn even more and he cries out in pain. He presses his dirty palm flat over the wound, feeling the warmth of his own blood spread over his palm, coating it in red. Namjoon shivers and stops, leaning against a thin tree, breathing out the pain.
Nobody is following him. He didn’t expect anyone to, with how busy everyone was and how they expected him to die. But he isn’t anything if not resilient. Even though something deep in him just wants to curl up in the grass and bleed out and die, but he can’t. He can’t allow himself to die, not yet at least, so he pushes himself back to his feet, stumbling over his own feet as he breaks into a run once again. He’s not very fast, the blood loss making him dizzy, but he keeps going even though his vision blurs with desperate tears.
The dirt path he follows leads him back to where he left the previous night, dragged away by the Blackbeard’s crew, laughing as he struggled against them, completely helpless, shouting his name-
Something ugly twists inside of him, and this time it’s not a blade, as the pathway suddenly widens to a reveal a little space with only a few trees, the ground trodden as the crew rested here. He pays it no attention, turning sharply to the left where the lagoon is, and there-
oh God no, oh God no-
Suga is still there, where the mocking crew left him the night before. His body is still, unmoving, fair skin nearly see through under the sunlight, his small eyes closed, round cheek resting against his thin arm. He looks nearly peaceful but Namjoon knows better than to be fooled by that. When his eyes trail up from Suga’s naked torso and face, he can see his wrists still pressed tight against the tree log, the rope digging into his skin, the once smooth, fair skin red and inflamed with how hard Suga must’ve pulled at the rope.
Namjoon can clearly see the image in his mind, Suga, all alone and scared, body only half hidden in the water because of Blackbeard’s cruelty. Suga, crying quietly, scared someone could hear and come and make his suffering even worse, tugging at his restraints to try to escape, but fail and then watching as the sun comes up, unable to escape it’s light as it-
as it-
He falls on the ground, his hands shaking as he tries to undo the knots on the rope, tears falling down his dirty cheeks, sobs forcing their way out of his throat. He knows he must be quite a pathetic sight to see, shaking and bleeding, dirty and exhausted and unwashed, lost man trying to free a dead monster.
God no, please, please don’t let him be dead yet,
,,He’s not- do not let him die, please, God please don’t,” Namjoon mutters pleadingly, to who, he doesn't know. Perhaps to God, but he knows God wouldn’t listen. He never listens anyway, and Namjoon lost his faith. When, he doesn't know either. Perhaps when he was tied on the ship, at mercy of the cruel crew. Perhaps when he first saw Suga, with his sharp teeth, screeching, a true inhuman creature of darkness, yet still so beautiful. Perhaps when he fell in love with him.
The knots fall free, finally, and Suga slips into the water, almost all of him disappearing, but thankfully, Namjoon’s fast enough to catch him under his armpits, pulling him close, pressing his dry body against his and fuck, Suga’s not supposed to dry, it’s going to hurt him-
Namjoon slowly lowers the man into the water, holding his head above the surface, cradling his face in his hands, hoping the man will wake, look at him once again. He doesn’t want the last memory of Suga’s eyes be connected with fear, betrayal and anger, he wants - he just wants for Suga to wake.
,,Bring him back to me, bring him back!” he half-shouts, his voice breaking at the thought of holding a corpse in his hands, of Suga actually being dead. He can’t accept that. How could that ever be fair? Suga never did anything wrong. He only wanted to live, no different from other creatures of the world, and now he’s dead.
no, God, please no
Suga’s eyelids flutter open, he draws a breath, his wet hands coming up to grip Namjoon’s wrist and he pulls himself free. Suga dives under the water, still holding onto him with firm grip, but Namjoon doesn’t even think of trying to free himself. He just watches in awe as the water sloshes around his wrists, the blurry outline of Suga’s body and the slight shine of teal.
Suga pulls up, his black hair sticking to his forehead, his catlike eyes studying Namjoon. He’s quiet, pouting a little and Namjoon would find that endearing, but all the happiness really drained him and now he inky feels exhausted. He exhales as Suga pushes up and brings his big hands to cup Namjoon’s face. He rubs his thumb over Namjoon’s cheekbone, then let’s go and dives under the water again. Namjoon only sees a quick flash of teal scales as Yoongi turns around, tail showing for a brief bit-
and then, just like that, he’s gone.
//
Namjoon’s laying on his side, one hand in the still water, only to simply feels something cold on his otherwise quickly overheating body. The wound stopped bleeding, but Namjoon has no hopes. He’s dying, he knows it.
It’s not that bad, he thinks, at least he managed to save Suga. Hopefully, the merman is on his way back to join his brothers and sisters in the sea. Namjoon exhales and closes his eyes, his eyelids feeling heavy. His whole body feels heavy, tired, just ready to sleep. Thoughts of Suga are nice to drift off to.
He wonders, did the merman ever love him back? Was it true, what Blackbeard said, or was it just all a plan of his? Namjoon knows that even though he knew the merman for awfully short time, he fell in love with him. He likes to think that Suga loved him back. That he’ll think of him, at least few times. That he won’t simply be forgotten.
,,Do not die,” sounds a deep, melodic voice and he opens his eyes, suddenly fully awake again. Everything still hurts so deeply when he turns around and looks at Suga. The merman is playing with his hand, but he barely feels his touch. He doesn’t think he could move the hand if he tried. Suga doesn’t seem to mind, watching him as he holds onto him, “I don’t want you to die yet, Namjoon.”
He only said his name once before, and the sound of it makes Namjoon smile lightly, “I thought you left,” he mutters and Suga shakes his head quickly.
,,Just- helped the humans at the Fountain out,” he answers and then tilts his head, craning his neck to get a better look at Namjoon’s injury. Namjoon doesn’t cover it, what point is there anyway? There’s no way of hiding it, “You’re hurt.”
,,Yeah,” Namjoon smiles and turns fully to his unhurt side, then on his belly. Yoongi lowers himself under the water, so only his neck and head is visible. They’re looking at each other now, Namjoon’s face right above Yoongi’s. They’re so, so close, “It’s alright, Suga. I don’t- I’m fine with dying. Made my peace a long time ago,” he hums and tries to look reassuring. He is alright with dying, he really is. He wants Suga to understand that too.
The merman doesn't seem to get it. He frowns, face scrunching up and shakes his head again, droplets of water landing on Namjoon’s face.
,,I can save you,” Suga says, and Namjoon doesn’t dare to hope, “Just ask,” the merman pleads, eyes wide open as he holds onto his hand, gripping it. The water is sloshing around them again, probably from how hard Suga is moving around under the water, distraught.
Namjoon exhales, smiles again, “The only thing I’d ever ask for is your forgiveness, Suga,” he murmurs quietly, unable to find his voice, “Because you gave me hope again, when I lost it,” his eyes water again and so do Suga’s, but Suga is quick to shake his head.
,,Just ask,” Suga nearly whines, tugging at Namjoon’s hand,
,,Forgive me, Suga,” Namjoon answers quietly and the merman pulls up, crashing their lips together.
It’s a peck and nothing more, a quick one before Namjoon feels strong pair of hands holding his upper arms, pulling him into the water. He doesn’t have time to catch a breath, lips once again slotted against Suga’s, but he doesn’t fear it.
Not even his wound is burning anymore, nothing hurts anymore, the only thing he can think of is Yoongi pressed against him, and somehow, somehow,
Namjoon feels so calm.