Chapter Text
It started as it would end, on a beach.
My whole life revolved around the ocean. Ever since I was born I have known nothing but the sea. I learned to walk on a rocking ship deck. Sea shanties lulled me to sleep at night. Monstrous storms scared me under the blankets of my bed. I learned how to steer a ship and tie a knot before I ever learned how to read or write. My blood was saltwater and my life was an endless adventure among the seas with a pirate crew.
Not just any pirate crew mind you. The fearsome buccaneers of the Jolly Roger led by the infamous Captain Hook. Of course I knew him as papa. I was a surprise to him and mama but they raised me well until mama died. Then it was just me, papa, the crew, and the ship. It was a good life up until papa decided to travel to Neverland.
Oh Neverland. It sounded like such a dream when he described it to the crew. Now we had been stuck in the realm for years forced to do the bidding of the island’s ruler. That arrogant and cruel imp that called himself Peter Pan. I disliked him immediately. Years passed and it was soon realized that we had been more brought to our torment then our paradise. Nothing but endless days sitting out in the bay with nothing to do but go stir crazy outside of when Pan made us run tasks.
The most interesting thing we ever got to do was go ashore for provisions. Now, you would think being the pirate daughter of the deadly Captain Hook would lend me to more important tasks. But, from the moment we had landed in Neverland papa had made it very clear that the island was a dangerous place that I shouldn’t venture alone. He kept me from leaving the ship most of the time. I think it’s because the first time I went ashore we ran into Pan and his horde of Lost Boys. Pan had a peculiar interest in me when we met that papa did not like. Hence, I was never allowed to go to the island by myself.
Today that had changed. Maybe he could sense that I was going stir crazy on the ship and wanted to give me a respite. It would be nice to get away from all the scabby pirates and rocking of the waves for an afternoon.
Papa gave me a row boat and set me off to grab some fresh water from the island. He assured me that the fairy, Tinkerbell, would be waiting at the shore to escort me. When I got to shore though, no one was there. I thought maybe I was early or in the wrong place so I wandered and waited yet still nothing.
I could not wait around all day and so went to grab the barrel for the water. As I tried to heave it out of the boat I noticed it was much heavier than I was expecting. I opened it up and saw that it was full but not of water. These were my clothes and my books and other various knick knacks and souvenirs I had acquired over my life. What were they doing here? Shouldn’t they be in my room on the ship? Was this a prank papa and the crew were playing on me?
I looked up over the horizon and could not spot the Jolly Roger. Had papa moved the ship? I closed the lid on the barrel full of my possessions and ran along the coast of the island searching for the ship. I climbed to the top of Dead Man’s Peak and looked out but the ship had vanished. Where...where had it gone? Why had it gone?
Dread started to set in. This had to be a mistake. A trick. An illusion. That nasty Pan must be playing a joke on me. He has to be. The ship is still out there it has to be. It all has to be a prank.
“You seem lost.” The voice behind me made me jump. I whirled around with the sword at my hip now drawn.
Peter Pan.
“There’s no need for all that, Lady Jones.” The demon boy leader grinned at me. “Please, let us be civil.”
“I don’t think it’s a good idea to be civil around you.” I sneered. I glanced at the sea. “Is this your doing? Hiding my father’s ship from me?”
“I have done no such thing and frankly I resent the remark. For what reason would I have to hide your father’s ship from you?”
“To torment me.” I kept my blade level with his face. “I am not so ignorant to your games and tricks, Pan. If you think hiding his ship from my view will stop me from getting back you are mistaken.”
“Does this not at all strike you as suspicious?” He asked, leaning against the mountain face. “You are barred from coming to the island alone for years, then one day out of the blue you are sent here by yourself?”
“I’m strong and I can handle myself. My papa knows this. He trusted me with getting fresh water for the crew.” I bit back.
“You? One person was supposed to take that big barrel and fill it with water and carry it back out to your little row boat? That is at least a two man job and you thought that you were going to be able to do it all on your own?”
“I’m stronger than I look. Besides, he said Tinkerbell was going to--”
“Tink?” Pan laughed, “I know for a fact that pirate hasn’t said a word to her in months.”
“You’re lying.”
“What do I gain by lying to you?”
“You’re trying to trick me! That’s what you do!” I started to back away, keeping my sword and gaze aimed at Pan. “Now I am going to go back down this mountain and this had all better be sorted.”
“I fear you’ll be gravely disappointed then.” Pan sighed. “But I’ll let you go for now. See how long it takes for reality to set in.”
In the blink of an eye Pan had disappeared. I sheathed my sword and raced back down the mountain and back to my boat. This was all just a trick. A joke. It was. It had to be. Papa would come for me when it started to get late. He has to.
I waited on the shore staring out over the horizon until the sun started to dip over the waves. It was sunset. Where was papa? Surely he had to notice that something was wrong. He had to. I need to calm down. I’m fine. I know what to do.
I went into the jungle and started gathering some branches to start a small fire. That way when the sun goes down and if papa still hasn’t made it here he’ll see the fire and know where I am. As I was gathering sticks though Pan’s words started to echo in my head. This all was rather suspicious in a way. Any time someone went to the island it was always in pairs of at least two. Then there was the matter that all my possessions were stuffed into the barrel. Why would anyone do that? What sort of prank was that supposed to be?
Now the ship was gone and the sun was setting and I was all alone for the first time in my life. But I for the life of me couldn’t think of why papa would leave me here if it wasn’t for Pan barring him. I’d be okay though. I’m the daughter of the fearsome Captain Hook! I could survive one night on Neverland by myself.
I sat down by the fire I made and munched on some berries I had also gathered while scavenging for firewood. For as horrible as this place was it was rather beautiful. Looking out over the inky black sea with the crescent moon reflecting across the rippling waves. It was so strange to look over the sea from the land.
I fell asleep next to my fire and when I woke up in the morning the ship was still missing from the waves. “Papa…” I whispered in fear and horror. Where is he?
“Good morning,” I turned and saw Pan sitting in the sand poking at the remnants of my fire from last night. “I was wondering when you were gonna wake up.”
“Get back.” I reached for my sword and froze when I didn’t feel it in its sheath.
“Yeah, I didn’t appreciate you waving it in my face yesterday.” Pan stabbed my sword into the sand next to him. “Now maybe we can have a civil conversation.”
“I have no interest in talking to you!” I reached for the dagger strapped to my thigh and groaned. I glared at Pan and he waved the small blade at me.
“I’m honestly surprised you don’t have a pistol but am otherwise glad that was one less thing I had to sneak off you.” Pan shrugged. “Did father dearest never teach you how to shoot?”
“Go away!” I grabbed a nearby rock and chucked it at his head. “Leave me alone!”
“Don’t take your anger out on me. I’m not the one that abandoned you.”
“No one abandoned me.” I shot to my feet. “You’re hiding the ship and papa from me. Now undo it!”
“I am not hiding anything. I’ve already told you.” Pan dropped my dagger next to my sword. “You don’t see the ship or any of the pirates because they’re gone. They left. They abandoned you here and they’re not coming back.”
“You’re lying!” I grabbed my sword and dagger. I started pushing the rowboat I had arrived in back into the sea. “If you won’t reveal the ship then I’m just gonna row out until I find it.”
“You’re gonna be rowing for eternity then.” He appeared in the blink of an eye now sitting in the boat. “They’re not out there. You can circle this entire ocean for the rest of time but you will never find the Jolly Roger. It is not here.”
“It is here. You’re just trying to keep me from it. You’re tricking me for your own sick pleasure!”
“Deny it all you want but the facts are against you.” He popped the lid of the barrel off and fished around in my things. “Clothes, books, compass, a pocketwatch, seems your entire life can fit into one barrel. That’d be impressive if it wasn’t so sad.”
“Stop rifling around in my stuff!” I jumped into the boat and slammed the lid back down on the barrel and snatched the pocketwatch out of his hands. “It’s just a prank the crew is playing on me.”
“Wow.” Pan shook his head, “You are so deep in denial I think you’re starting to believe yourself. Delusions won’t do well for you, Lady Jones. Best to just accept the grim and heartbreaking reality that you’ve been abandoned by the only family you’ve ever known and try to move on.”
“Whatever sick mind game you think you’re playing--”
“No games,” He grinned, drawing closer so he was nose to nose staring me down. “I’ll leave you be, see how long you can hold out before you accept your predicament. I wager you’ll last maybe a week before that stubbornness finally breaks.”
I shoved him hard and he fell back into the shallows of the shore. I stood above him my blood up and my fists clenched. “You will never break me.”
“Break you?” He started to laugh and the noise sent a tremor of danger through my bones. “I don’t want to break you. Oh no, why would I ever want to extinguish that red hot fire you having burning inside you? I don’t want you broken, my little spitfire. I want nothing more than to add wood to the fire. I want to see how hot you can burn.”
What in the world did he mean? Before I could ask what he was on about he disappeared again. Fine, at least he’s gone now. I can…
I looked down at the floor of the boat and nearly screamed. He took the oars!
I pushed the boat back onto shore and strapped my weapons back onto my person. If this was the game Pan wanted to play then so be it. I would need to find a better source of food if I was going to be stranded here longer. Whenever Pan was done with this idiotic game then he was going to have a lot of angry pirates after him I knew that much.
I stared down at the pocketwatch still in my hand and clicked it open. The hands had been stuck at the same time since we got to Neverland but still it ticked for some reason. On the inside was an inscription. A favorite saying of papa’s that he always wanted me to remember. Those unwilling to fight for what they want deserve what they get. “Well, I’ll keep fighting. I will always keep fighting, papa. I’ll fight until I find a way back to you.”
The rest of the day I spent foraging for food and keeping a weather eye out for any sign of the ship or the crew. I started a fire and stared out over the sea as night fell. Surely someone would come by tomorrow. Someone would come.
The next day was more of the same. I pulled out one of my books to read during the dull hours of nothing that made up my day. Pan did not show up at least. I don’t know whether that is better or worse.
Another day and I decided to build a small shelter in case it ended up raining. Nothing special. Just some sticks tied together and lots of fronds to create a roof over my head. No rain came but I felt like I got something accomplished during my wait.
I spent the entire next day walking the shore of the island. I made a lap around it twice before I started to get hungry and retired to the jungle to hunt down some food. I spotted some of the Lost Boys from a distance but none of them approached me. I realized that I hadn’t spoken to anyone since I pushed Pan into the water.
None of my books were holding my interest and practicing with my sword was frustrating. I went for a swim and let the familiar rock of the ocean ease my mind. I hummed an old lullaby papa used to sing to me when I was a child. I would give anything to hear his voice. I would give anything to hear the hoarse sea shanties the crew would sing. I ducked my head under the water so the tears couldn’t roll down my face.
The temporary shelter I made on the beach was now a small hut. There was more room inside for me to store my books and other belongings. That night I could hear music coming from the jungle and it sounded so inviting. I laid in my hut unable to move in fear of what that could mean.
A week had gone by and still Pan had not tired of this game. He said he would give me a week till I broke down and accepted that I had been abandoned. I held my little bunny toy close to my chest and reminded myself that Pan is a liar. Pan is a liar. Pan is a liar. Papa will come for me. I know papa will come for me.
Two weeks. I tried to find Tinkerbell but the fairy was well hidden in the jungle. I was desperate for someone to talk to. The music at night grew louder and louder to the point my crying was the only thing that could block it out.
Pan visited me after a month. He sat down with me as I cooked myself dinner. He offered to take me back to his camp for a better meal but I declined. I needed to be here in case one of the crew came looking for me. When I looked back at him I could see pity in his eyes. It made me sick.
Tinkerbell came upon my camp one morning and asked what I was doing here. I told her about how papa had sent me to get fresh water and then how Pan made the ship disappear. I could tell she wanted to say something but she didn’t. She invited me back to her treehouse for tea and I nearly cried with joy. Finally, some real human interaction.
I am talking a mile a minute as Tinkerbell leads me through the jungle towards her treehouse. After over a month of having no one but my bunny toy to talk to I couldn’t get the words to stop flowing out of my mouth. If she thought it was annoying she didn’t say anything.
We climbed the long ladder up to her treehouse and she sat me down as she made a pot of tea. It was bitter and scalded my tongue with how fast I drank it. Nothing had tasted better.
“So, you’re Hook’s kid.” Tink nodded at me. “Gotta say I’m surprised. He talked about you of course but he never gave me any details.”
“I’m not surprised. Papa likes to keep things close to the chest even with those he trusts.” I gripped the mug a little tighter, “I guess it has something to do with being a pirate.”
“And you say it’s been over a month since you saw him last?” Tink asked.
“Yes. I came ashore to grab fresh water and when I turned around the ship was gone. I figured Pan was keeping it hidden with some kind of cloaking spell and blocking the crew from leaving the ship but it’s getting to be so long now.” I stared down into my mug. “All my possessions on the ship were in the boat with me when I sailed out and I don’t know how to justify it anymore.”
“Hey kid,” Tink scooted over to the spot next to me and put an arm around my shoulders. “Are you gonna be okay?”
“I have no idea.” I sniffed, “I hear music at night coming from the jungle. It scares me. It scares me cause I want to follow it. I try to remember things but they keep slipping away before I can grasp them.”
“That’s the curse of the island. You stay here long enough and you start to forget. The past, your life, even the things that seem ingrained in your soul fade away.”
“But I don’t want to forget. I want to go home. I want to go back to the ship with the crew and papa.” Tears started to leak from my eyes, “I don’t want to forget anything.”
“I’m afraid there’s no way around it. If you’re hearing the music then there’s really not much you can do.”
I started crying harder. Tinkerbell didn’t say a word as I wept and wailed. Everything was slipping away from me and I couldn’t do anything to stop it. I tried to recall the faces of everyone on the ship but they’re blurry. I could only remember specific things like scars and tattoos. Even names wouldn’t come easily. I thought of my father and tried to burn his image in my head. What color were his eyes again? Green? No, blue! Maybe?
I apologized to Tinkerbell for breaking down like I did. I was stronger than that. It was just that after a month of having no one to talk to and wondering if my father was ever going to come rescue me I was in a fragile place. She did not begrudge me my grief and walked me back to my hut on the beach.
The sun was setting and soon it would be night. The music would come again. I know it would. Inviting and terrifying at the same time. Tonight it would stop though. It’s another trick of Pan’s. A ploy to get me to break. If I can stop the music then I can stop forgetting.
Night fell and the fire I had made was now only glowing embers. I stared into their warm dimming light when the first notes of a haunting melody floated through my ears. I lit a lantern and stood up staring into the dark jungle. It was time for the music to end.