Work Text:
I.
It had happened before, he remembers vaguely when he was a child, where the bright lights of the city swirled and blended into a cacophony of pain. He remembers the sharp pains jutting through his chest, crying out for his grandfather. The crowds had separated them, and the noise became a powerful buzz. Never-ending, infinite pain. He remembers the angry sharp words of the men in slick suits shoving him to the side on their way to work. He thinks they’re being awfully rude, he had heard rumors the city was like this, but he didn’t want to believe they were true. He hated it. It had taken his grandfather thirty minutes to find him and deal with the hysterics on the way home. They hadn’t returned to the city since.
Sometimes the classroom would twist, he wasn’t sure why, but he’d see shapes dancing around the children. His uniform some days felt like a boa constrictor, wrapping around him suffocating him in wool, those days his brain would become static and his tongue sharper. Some kids had decided to bug him, their shrill voices piercing his head, his anger writhing up uncontrollably. He’d snapped and told them that there was an old woman following them and watching them throughout the day, maybe even while they slept. He’d received a scathing glare from the lady before she’d turned into a rainbow cloud of dust and floated off. It hadn’t ended well.
“Why am I being dragged here in the middle of the day? Aren’t you disrupting my grandson’s education with such actions?!” His grandfather had spent most of the meeting angrily scolding the teacher. He found a fascinating crack on the floor that he imagined held a small world. Maybe there were little people climbing the walls. Ropes and riggings connecting the gaps so people could cross.
“Mr. Itadori, this is the fifth incident this week. Your grandson has portrayed deeply concerning behavior!” He jerks his head up staring. He hadn’t don’t anything wrong, merely told them so they’d be safe. After all, who wants creepy old people watching you while you sleep?
“Miyano Sensei! I really did forget my homework though!” His teacher had been kind, her straight black hair framed her face delicately, like a doll. However, she’d soon started snapping when it came to light that the antics of the first few weeks were to become the norm.
“And I suppose your inability to stay sitting is simply genetic. Really Yuuji I expected better from you!” His face burns, he hated being forced to stand in the hallway whenever he moved too much or fell off his chair. Even worse was when she made him stay after to go over problems he’d answered wrong. He hated how boring the problems were. It was just numbers on a page he didn’t understand why they were important. He liked gym though, he was good at gym and it was straightforward. He also liked art, although he didn’t think he was the best at it.
“I’ll ask you to refrain from insulting or scolding my grandson. Leave that to his family!” His grandfather huffs. Standing up he turns towards the door. “Let’s go kid you can come back tomorrow.” He beams, his grandfather was strict but he always knew how to keep his spirits up. The sun shines brightly as he rambled on about the newest sport their gym class was learning, and how he’d easily beaten the other kids! His grandfather nodded in approval. If there was an extra serving of rice, or his favorite dessert that night, he was none the wiser.
He’d returned to the dark black marker on his desk. His friends suddenly started pretending they had plans, one even returned a gatchapon he’d given him. Said he wasn’t interested in the show anymore. He smiled anyway. He always smiled.
“Freak, Spastic, Liar”
He choked on the mud, gritting his teeth. The foot slammed into his back again. He couldn’t help but think he was going to need to use extra bleach to get out the stains. He hated the slimy greasy feeling on his skin. Laughter and the world faded out to black.
“Bad Omen, Cursed, Diseased!”
She enjoyed writing and was quiet. She’d transferred in the second semester, not knowing to stay away, and had shown him the marvelous stories she wrote. All he heard was crying. The bright pink rabbit stained with ink seemed to mock him.
“I HATE YOU!”
He’d ended up transferring out after he’d judo thrown a kid down the stairs to prevent being stabbed with a paper cutter. His grandfather had spared no expense with tutors. And he eventually started getting decent grades, even if it was solely due to rote memorization and not actually understanding the material.
“Yuji, if you’re having difficulty paying attention find something to fiddle with.” He loosens his fingers, his head aching. The words on the textbook had blurred, he’d spent the last hour rereading the same paragraph on the Showa era, if he had to read one more sentence about miracles and economics he was going to chuck the book through the window.
“Hah? I don’t get why I need to know this stuff, it’s not like I’m going to be a historian!” He slams his head onto the table huffing. Something flies and hits his face, he blinks. “What’s this?”
“Fiddle with it while reading, sometimes it’s good to multitask.” His grandfather walks off leaving him staring at the cube.
Surprisingly enough, it worked.
Time never seemed to matter to him, until the hospital. The one time that was now ingrained into his very being was 5 o’clock. While running to the hospital the chimes sounded. He hated being late for this. Of course, his grandfather always scolded him, saying he should focus more on his clubs, academics, and friends. But it was important. He’d been late for many things, but never this.
Time stopped at 5:30.
And then the seconds began counting backward with the strange boy in black. Things seemed to move too fast and then too slow afterward.
Apparently, he was going to be executed now?
II.
The kid was brimming with raw potential. His brute strength alone made him a force to be reckoned with. However, he never expected this from him.
“Ahhh… hnnnnnnn…. I donttttt knowwww. Or I don’t understand. I can’t do it Gojo-sensei… it’s too hard!” Itadori Yuuji, the vessel of Sukuna–one of the most powerful special grades out there, complaining over a basic essay for his Japanese literature class.
“What’s not to understand? You read the book… so write a paper about it right?” Yuuji scowls and throws his hands up and spins around on the chair.
“Write about the symbolism and literary devices used in Lady Murasaki’s The Tale of Genji.” Robotic droning vocals echo in the room. “Oh yeah okay, so clear. Very understandable. How the fuck am I supposed to write that though?!”
“I’m not sure what you’re actually struggling with here?” Yuuji groans and faceplants on top of the pile of notes.
“Where do I even start…? Things were so much easier when you just had me watching movies, or going on field trips…”
“What’s the difference? School is school.” He shrugs.
“Those were easy because I was doing something. This is just sitting around thinking all day.” Sitting around was definitely not the kid's strong point, movies aside.
“You sat around and watched movies for two months, kid.”
“Yeah because movies are fun! They’re interesting. Did you know the first Japanese film production studio was built in 1909? Oooh or that Star Wars was influenced by Japanese samurai films?!” The kid was getting ready to ramble, practically buzzing in his seat.
“I did not know that. So find a way to make this fun. You need to write a paper, you have all these notes, so find a way to make a physical hands-on outline of your paper? Like, draw a mind map on the whiteboards?” He gets up and writes Lady Murasaki and then draws a line upwards and writes Helen Period Art and branches it off, “What were the central themes in Helen period art forms?”
“Political conflict led to a lot of detailed stuff about melancholy and the inner nature of sadness or something. Lots of Buddhist imagery. Although Murasaki’s Tale of Genji was the first novel and written entirely as waka… I think there was some Shinto imagery in there as well.” Yuuji rambles twirling a pencil in ever more complicated patterns. “Helen means peace though, which is ironic considering all the conflict… lots of poetry was written during that time hence Murasaki…”
“I think I’ve got it, see,” The look of shock on Yuji’s face seeing the intricate layout and little doodles here and there based on what he said made having to write it out in the first place worth it. “You can color code it too, there are colored markers over there.”
“Gojo-Sensei, you’re amazing! You’re like the only teacher ever who actually knows how to teach????” Yuuji runs over and begins writing up other stuff moving around. Gojo frowns.
“Did none of your teachers help you with stuff like this?”
“One whacked me with a ruler every time I got a math problem wrong. I used to get papers back with red ink everywhere I think. One said I had to be stupid for not knowing the difference between a Daimyō and the Shogun.” Yuuji shrugs too busy writing stuff down to look at him. His heart clenches. This kid was airheaded sure, but he wasn’t stupid. He wished he could find those teachers and slap them.
“... I see… erh… if you ever need help coming up with study ideas let me know kid, your success is mine you know! Plus I aced all my classes. The strongest and the smartest!” Yuji turns and grins, giving him a thumbs up.
“You got it Sensei!” He leaves the room feeling slightly better, he wasn’t all that good at the teaching part at least not for none-jujutsu based stuff. At least Yuuji seemed to have benefited from it.
...
He had been going for a stroll through the school, it was a slow period so there weren’t many students around. It was boring, and even his moody pupil Megumi was nowhere to be seen. So he couldn’t even tease him. So caught up in his thoughts he didn’t even notice the redhead and bumped right into her in the hallway.
“Ah… Kugisaki… didn’t see you-“
“DID YOU EVEN GO TO BED? YOU LOOK LIKE DEATH???? Hahhhh?” She yells at the classroom’s only inhabitant. He leans over and his jaw almost drops open. Yuuji was blinking blearily at them, his hair messier than usual. Bags under his eyes making a wonderful impression of Panda.
“Ah… Gooooja senseiiiii. Goood mawn-ng.” He’s shoved aside by Kugisaki who quickly makes a sound of surprise.
“Did you write all of this????” Every whiteboard was covered in colorful words with diagrams and sticky notes. The small mind map had turned into a work of art on its own.
“I wrote the entire essay… guess I lost track of the time hehe…” Yuuji hesitantly rubs his neck avoiding looking him in the eye. He couldn’t have that. He leans toward him and grins.
“Yu-u-ji-kuunnn, please remember to get some sleep next time.” Yuuji’s face flares bright red and he nods quickly. While fending off numerous questions from Kugisaki, he sees the paper in question. Snatching the laptop amidst a very loud sound of disagreement, he begins to read it.
“That paper wasn’t even due until Friday, you had all week?” Kugisaki stammers, clearly struggling to act indifferent despite her surprise.
“Ahhhh… it’s probably no good. But once I finished the mind map I was like, I could leave it you know, so I started the first page and then lost track of it and haha ended up fin-“
“This is excellently written. To think yesterday you were complaining about how impossible it was. Although no paper is worth losing a night's sleep, over…” His eyes light up and he nods vigorously.
“YES SIR! Thanks for the help…”
“I barely did anything, kid, this was all you. I just gave you an idea.” Damn this kid was going places, that level of dedication was impressive.
III.
She was loathed to admit it, but she had missed having him around. He may be a giant puppy, and unable to keep his damn mouth shut, but he was a genuinely nice person. Which is why she was even more amazed when he showed up for the date she’d been blown off at. She’d met the girl online and they’d hit it off, but she supposed maybe she’d come on too strong, and here she was at the cafe humiliated. At least until the bell rang and there was a shout.
“AH! Sorry I’m late, I got lost on the train haha!” Itadori makes his way over, drawing the attention of almost everyone in that weird charismatic way of his. If she liked men she probably would’ve declared her undying love for him at that moment. She had been getting embarrassed from all the side glances from waitresses and other patrons.
“No problem… honey .” His eyes widen and he grins seemingly getting her joke immediately. He laughs and laughs.
“Zen’in told me about your date, I was in the area and saw you alone. You okay?” He leans in whispering, genuinely kind, cavity-inducing almost.
“Got stood up. Nothing new. Let’s eat. We still have the rest of the day off to explore Tokyo. I was thinking about visiting some of the shrines and temples here.” They had been given a rare day off by their eccentric teacher, probably because he felt bad about denying them an actual tour of Tokyo. Itadori nods enthusiastically. She noticed he was always moving somehow. His knee was jumping, although he awkwardly stopped and was quite rigid once he noticed her staring.
“Erh… sorry. It’s so boring back on campus… got a lot of energy left over I guess. Um… I’ll stop now haha.” She frowns. It was rare for him to actually act embarrassed about his habits. Especially considering he made eating corpse parts his life’s purpose.
“I don’t care what you do, just don’t knock anything off. You can relax, I'm not gonna bite your head off you know.” His knee returns to shaking, and he relaxes over their meal.
The loud bustling crowd of Asakusa intermingled with the scent of fresh food, leaving them drooling in anticipation. She had heard about the shopping district but hadn’t realized it would be this crowded. Itadori was trailing behind her commenting on every little thing he could see.
“Whoa! That shop’s selling masks, wonder if I could get the jump on Gojo-Sensei with it… OOOH LOOK MATCHA ICE CREAM! Did you know Sensō-Ji has been rebuilt a bunch of times? Also, they apparently have bones from Buddha there. I want to get a fortune.” She blinks taking in the sudden onslaught of information. “Two fishermen I think found a golden statue of Kannon in the river threw it back and it kept coming back so the whole temple is dedicated to it. Maybe I should have tried to get Gramps to come with me to the Kaminarimon, supposedly it cures illnesses… although not sure if that applies to old age. Ahh, I haven’t been to a major city like this since I was a kid. Weird since I know we used to live near Tokyo. Don’t remember-“
“You know a lot about this place huh… didn’t expect that from you.” She interrupts, head spinning with the onslaught. He blinks and pauses, flinching slightly.
“Sorry sorry, just tell me if I’m talking too much. Guess I go on tangents a lot when I’m excited. Pretty boring facts, but I figured it’s important to read up on the places you visit.” She nods. He really was different when relaxed. Especially outside the whole Jujutsu thing. It was unexpected.
“No really it’s fine, I’m curious, what do you know about bakeries in Tokyo?”
“Bakeries?”
“Any recommendations?” He tilts his head, lips pursed completely concentrated.
“I really don’t know anything about them. I can do some research tonight though and let you know tomorrow?” His gaze wanders and catches on a stall with bright colored Choco-bananas. “My friend once ate 8 of them in a row and got sick. I hate hospitals, you know, no fun being there over the holiday season ...very dreary places...hospitals. Guess it makes sense, lots of curses there I suppose.” She almost feels an urge to comfort him, over what, she doesn’t know but there’s a deep sense of loneliness around him. Which is odd because he’s one of the most social people she’s ever met. He could probably befriend a curse, Fushiguro’s Shiki not included.
After the temple they find themselves wandering through the dense forests around Meiji Shrine. She’s surprised at how easy conversation with Itadori ends up being. While he may talk a lot, he’s passionate about it, but he also frequently stops and makes sure it’s okay. It’s a weird habit, someone wanting to know if they’re allowed to talk. She wonders where he picked that up from.
“So the torii of Meiji shrine has if I remember correctly the largest continuous crossbar in the world. Which is amazing. I’ve never seen a tree that tall. Or wide. I’ve heard in America there are trees that you need fifty full grown men holding hands to get the whole width which is a lot of people. Crowds suck though, sometimes I miss that about the countryside.”
“I don’t miss it one bit.”
“Ah yes, your reason for being a sorcerer was to escape all that huh?”
“I’m surprised you remembered that.”
“I remember a lot of things. It’s important to maintain proper social cohesion or whatever.” He shrugs and folds his arms behind his head. The sun was beginning to set, so they began to head back to the dormitory.
“I am loathed to admit this, but I wouldn’t mind hanging out again… I guess.” He stares at her and hums.
“You should try asking Zen’in out on a date you know. I think she’d like that after all the drama that’s happened.” Her face burns bright red and she shoves him away as he laughs.
IV.
He had never felt disorientation. To be fair he hadn’t felt much of anything in a couple of hundred years. Well not since he’d had his own body. Even more interesting, the body he had now still maintained its autonomy. Itadori Yuuji was an enigma and an annoying brat. He was perfectly content to bid his time and watch from the shadows. So suddenly being forced into a disjointed reality, feeling everything and nothing was an unpleasant experience even for the special grade curse.
“Oi, kid… what the fuck?” His voice sounded hoarse, almost as if the kid had been screaming. He attempts to move, if the brat was gonna force him into the body the least he could do was fuck up some shit for when he returned. His limbs felt heavy, his whole body was almost impossible to move. He shifts his head to the side and moves fingers, watching them blur and multiply, floating detached. Something was wrong. Not that he knew what. It wasn’t with him, since he couldn’t get sick.
“Kid, seriously, the fuck is going on? I’ll kill your friends, get back in your body, I’m not fucking joking.” He tries entering his domain, only to hit a massive wall of anxiety and other nasty emotions.
This was going to take longer than he thought. He finally manages to force himself up. Hating the fact that he couldn’t tell where his own limbs were, it was like a particularly heavy fog was blinding him. He stumbles to the bathroom, and manages to look in the mirror, and is surprised.
There are no markings, extra eyes, or any indications that he’s in charge… which was incredibly unusual. He reaches for his usual cursed energy and is overwhelmed with pure unlimited exhaustion. He falls, the atmosphere blacking out. Oh maybe finally the kid was coming back.
The longest time passed, and he’s jarred from the black abyss he’d been passively floating through by muffled sounds.
“-ri? ITADORI? YUUJI?!” He blinks, feeling the presence of another person… oh maybe that was Sukuna. No, he was… Sukuna? No that’s not right, he was tired really really tired.
“I’m going to kill that fucking brat!”
“You’re not Itadori, Sukuna how did you possess him without…?”
“Well good news for you I can’t do shit in my current state or you’d be dead. But the brat’s also incapable of doing anything so I got stuck with the body… and none of the abilities.” Fushiguro Megumi was the only interesting thing he’d experienced so far. Perhaps he’d have some insight on their current predicament.
“Hah?”
“I’m tired, just leave me here Fushiguro, mmmmfine.”
“Take your body back god damn it!” He sits up sharply and nausea plows through the body, he grimaces and wills it down. He would not be getting physically ill alongside whatever it is that the kid’s gotten.
“I’m getting Gojo, and he’ll deal with you. I don’t know what you did to Itadori-“. Fushiguro stands up abruptly dragging him along, the room spins, and shadows dance in the corners. Really he feels like he’s watching himself, which is odd.
“I told you I have nothing to do with this…” he sighs and stumbles back to the bed. “The fucking kid was screaming or something earlier, and I suddenly wake up in a detached possession, which only happens when there’s something physically fucked up with the body.” Detached possession he’d only seen with those suffering from brain abnormalities, which he’s fairly certain isn’t the case here. The kid didn’t hallucinate or have early onset tissue degeneration, not that he’d last checked. He quickly scans the kid’s brain, only finding a slightly above normal presence of cortisol and a lower than normal level of dopamine.
“Detached?” Ah good, he’s still here. Delay the arrival of the other man, it would complicate things. One of the only good things about being stuck in the kid’s body was unblocked access to his memories, so he skims them for answers, getting a mixed result.
“Damn this kid’s more fucked up than my original diagnosis. But I ain’t a fucking doctor. He’ll be fine in an hour I suppose, maybe…. probably.”
“Probably ain’t good enough! Fix it. Now.”
“This ain’t an illness of the body boy, it’s of the mind. And I make a habit of not screwing with brain functions on the principle of the thing.” He waves a hand, which seems to have stopped changing appearance, so that’s good.
“Illness of the mind?”
“You sorcerers never have good experiences, why else would you be here anyways. Normal people don’t hunt curses for a living. Anyway just leave, nothing you can do. I’ll make sure the kid knows to check up with you when he gets back.” Fushiguro hesitates, he smirks at the soft action. “I don’t have my powers, there’s literally nothing I can do. Also, I don’t even want to be out right now so…”
“Fine but you are immediately sending him over to my room once he gets back.” He storms from the room slamming the door. The fog was returning, no point in fighting it, he leans back sinking into that black void like state.
“I’m not apologizing. And I don’t need to explain myself to you.” He blinks finding himself back in his domain. The kid was hunched over a few skulls on the bottom, almost appearing defeated.
“Explain what? Your brain is your brain, I’m just along for the ride. Don’t fucking do it again, or at least leave me out of it.” He snaps leaning back into his throne, tapping a beat on the arms.
“You didn’t hurt anyone did you?”
“I didn’t have any powers, think of it as me being in control of your body, but as if I were just another human. No abilities, no cursed energy, no threat.”
“That hasn’t happened in a really long time… it won’t happen again hopefully…”. The kid looks around attempting to avoid eye contact with him. Curiouser and curiouser.
“Fushiguro was worried about you. Shouldn’t keep him waiting. It’s already been three hours.” The brats head snaps up looking panicked.
“How do I get out of here?!”
“That’s for you to figure out ain’t it. I certainly didn’t drag you here. Deal with it yourself.”
V.
Something was wrong with Itadori. Sure the weird episode with Sukuna was still fresh in his memory, but this went beyond that. Itadori had come and merely said he hadn’t been feeling well that day and that it wouldn’t happen again. The way he’d refused to even look at Fushiguro in the eyes had caused his heart to clench.
“Wonderful it’s them again…” Zen’in hisses. The tension in the group increases. Itadori frowns, eyes darting between his upperclassmen and the men in suits walking towards them.
“Kyoto guys again? We can take em!” Kugisaki cracks her knuckles, looking a little too pleased with the prospect of beating up random students.
“Itadori Yuuji.” The woman’s voice cuts through the air harshly, a cold chill passes through him. The shadows bubble and he can see his Shiki waiting to be summoned. He shoves them back, shifting to be slightly in front of the aforementioned boy.
“Present and accounted for, hah. And you a-“
“Tainted child you are. What a shame. I can tell even before you became a vessel, you attracted bad things.” Itadori’s grin fades, shadows dart across his eyes. His voice trembles slightly.
“Bit rude to just go around insulting people ya know. I don’t really care though. What do you want anyways?” Fushiguro notices the glint of red appearing on the boy's cheeks, Sukuna glaring at the offending party.
“Everything you touch, everyone you surround yourself with will succumb to your poison. Such is the fate of a cursed vessel. That’s all. Good day.” The woman walks off leaving them in her dust, her two assurances rushing after her bowing quickly before scampering off.
“What the fuck was up with that lady? Geesh, where’s she get off talkin’ like that?” Kugisaki snarls, fists clenched.
“Konbu!”
“She’s the head of the Juharai family and a major funder of the Tokyo branch. Even Gojo-Sensei doesn’t antagonize her.” Panda responds, frowning.
“EH? Why??? He’s all-powerful?”
“Even he is forced to do things by the book sometimes,” Zen’in responds, shrugging. His eyes flick towards the vessel, noticing he had curled up into a ball.
“It-“
“I’m fine guys, no need to get all up in arms. I’ll get all of Sukuna’s fingers and then people like Miss Juharai will stop complaining. Anyway, I remembered I have homework I didn’t finish so I’m gonna go early. See ya.” He jumps up and sprints off. Fushiguro narrows his eyes. He makes a mental note to check up on the boy later.
A whole week passes and Itadori is practically a ghost, at least to Fushiguro. The only reason he’s now in contact is due to an exorcism job Gojo was supervising and dragged the three of them on.
“Kugisaki behind you!” A curse twists around flinging a pile of staples towards the nail wielder. She dodged gracefully, sending several nails into it, exploding.
“Jeez, a bit more warning next time!” Itadori flinches and nods suddenly going serious.
“Fail...fa...il….failure….” the curse lunges towards Itadori, who is frozen.
“DON'T JUST STAND THERE!”
A sickening crunch is heard as the curse’s claws dig into the boy's arm tearing a large cut. However the most alarming thing was how empty his eyes were, not even shock was present. Just… nothingness. A burst of high pitched laughter appears on the stairs.
“Oh ho ho ho ho! My my Sukuna darling you’ve gotten weak if such a minor curse can harm your vessel.” A woman appears, body made of rare gems, a multitude of eyes and mouths zigzag across her form. Her voice was like nails on a chalkboard. The pressure in the room snaps.
“Huh? Did I say I’d switch with you kid????” Black marks spread across Itadori’s body, the blood-red eyes opened on his cheeks looking annoyed. “Fucking brat, now you get to watch your friends die. I ain’t fight’n’ ya Lazureris go ahead do your worst.”
Everything promptly went to shit. Honestly, he was amazed they made it out. Sukuna refused to help, and a small army of curses flooded the room, bringing back unpleasant memories of the prison. They only escaped due to a last-minute intervention by Gojo who’d sensed the sudden spike in malicious energies.
“WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU SWAPPING OUT OVER A MINOR CURSE LIKE THAT! ARE YOU STUPID?” Kugisaki shrieks, chewing out the boy. His shoulders were slumped, Sukuna having vanished the minute Gojo stepped in. “WELL ANSWER ME?!”
“You’re right. I fucked up. It’s my fault.” Itadori says flatly, to the point that Gojo shoots him a look.
“I have no idea what’s up with him. He’s been acting off all week.”
“Hmmm. Talk to him later yeah? He looks like he could use it.” He frowns, leave it to the bastard man himself to keep things vague.
He later finds Itadori working himself to exhaustion in the gym around one in the morning. No time like the present he supposed.
“You’ve been acting weird.”
“SO WHAT? I’m not allowed to have feelings is that it?! Hah?!” Fushiguro steps back under the sudden anger. However, as soon as it appeared it vanished leaving Itadori looking pale and… afraid? “I’m sorry. Don’t tell Gojo-Sensei…” He bolts towards the door and vanishes around the corner before Fushiguro can even get a word out edgewise. Guess he was going to corner him after all. This was turning out to be a headache.
The door opens and he sees Itadori curled up wrapped in a blanket on the floor rocking and muttering to himself. The boy flinches violently when he sits next to him.
“I’m going to guess this is a pile-up of numerous experiences, and not just you beating yourself up over the mission.” His eyes remained lowered, he curls tighter, tension lining his arms and legs. How such a heavy person could appear so small and meek was a mystery. “I’m not going to pretend I’m not slightly pissed you messed up a simple mission.” A flinch, he begins to withdraw. “But, I also can tell you’ve been dealing with something bigger for weeks now.” He lightly wraps a hand around his wrist. He waits.
“I… she’s right everything I touch gets hurt or dies… I don’t know.” Itadori let’s put a shaky breath and props his chin on his knees staring forcibly at the wall. “I’m a screw-up. Way before this whole Sukuna mess.” Tears begin to build in his eyes.
“Why do you think that?” From what he saw of the boy's regular high school life he was well-liked and athletic every high school boy’s dream.
“My head, it doesn’t work right. Shit doesn’t make sense that’s supposed to. I got angry a lot as a kid and hurt my grandpa a few times. Easy assignments were a fucking nightmare. Guess Sukuna’s just my karma though, heh…” His voice was trembling.
“Don’t say that. There is no such thing as karma, good and bad aren’t that clear cut. Believe me.” He sniffs, exhaling in jagged breaths.
“That’s just it. You don’t know anything!” Itadori shouts before dropping back into the darker mood. “People liked me? That’s a joke, they couldn’t possibly like me, I move too much, I’m too loud, I can focus, I-“
“I can say you’ve grown on me, with confidence. And I’m fairly certain Kugisaki would be utterly devastated if you pulled another death stunt like that.”
“STOP IT STOP LYING! I HATE IT, I HATE THAT I’M LIKE THIS AND I CAN’T EVEN BLAME IT ON SUKUNA!” Tears were streaming down his face, he had launched himself up, and his body was shaking tremendously. “I hate that I can’t meet people without thinking “oh they must hate me” that I can read a book without stopping a thousand times to take a break, I hate it all, I wish it would just STOP!” He falls to his knees and sobs. Fushiguro immediately summons his shikigami and has them curl up against the boy.
“Hey, breath okay? Look I can’t say everything will be better cause we’re sorcerers. Our life is guaranteed to be shit. But I can tell you no one thinks any less of you for shit you can’t control. Pretty sure Sukuna even said it wasn’t a big deal you know.” Itadori was hyperventilating gasping for air. He reaches a hand out and presses it against the chest that once bled openly- a massive hole stood where the heart should’ve been. He shudders, willing the image away. That was an issue for another time. “We all have shit we gotta work around. Zen’in can’t see curses so she wears glasses you know. Also pretty sure Gojo can’t pay attention to shit in classes. I have heard from reliable sources he did shit in school, his grades were awful in non-jujutsu classes.” A weak laugh. Good, they were making progress. “I’m just saying you’re not alone okay. If you need something just ask. You have friends here and allies. We want to help. I want to help.”
“T-thanks… I needed that.” Itadori was wiping his eyes and sniffing. He offers a weak smile, before burying his face in the plush fur of the demon dogs, both of which let out suspiciously happy puppy noises.
“Anytime.” He moves to leave before a hand flies out and grabs his shirt.
“Stay… please… just for tonight?”
“Sure, pick a movie we can watch it until we fall asleep.”
