Chapter Text
6:44 PM
She could almost find peace in this moment. Birds had stopped chirping hours ago, squirrels refused to continue scampering in front of her, the park had become devoid of people, and the sky had become a serene shade of orange. The bench she sat on was just comfortable enough for her to relax, yet just uncomfortable enough to prevent her from falling asleep. It was as close to peace that she’d gotten in a year.
Max’s eyes stared down the blazing sun as it creeped beneath the horizon, shading the park in deep red and forcing the tall redwood trees that dotted the landscape to cast long, black shadows across the green grass beneath them. It was almost ironic how crucial her actions, or rather lack of actions, were at this point. Every step she took and every sentence she spoke could mean the difference between keeping reality somewhat normal or completely unraveling the fabric of time. And here she was, sitting on an old, wooden bench in an empty park just basking in the amber glow of the sunlight.
But Max knew her own existence here, at this moment, meant that she could actually fix everything that she had fucked up fixing time and time again. Her ability to sit here and watch the sun set slowly over an oh-so familiar Arcadia Bay three years before she was really meant to return meant that she might finally be able to give the one person she truly loves peace. Even if it meant she wouldn’t be able to see that person live on with her.
“You’re on a timer, you know that?” The blurred image of herself that sat next to her said.
Max didn’t respond. Her past self didn’t try to press on like she usually did, instead resigning to silence. They both knew, no matter how bad they didn’t want it to be this way, that it had to happen like this.
Months ago...
It took her a while to get the hang of rewinding. And when she did, she barely felt any different. Which, considering three months ago her rewinding any further than a minute caused her entire body to keel over and her brain to burst in pain, was a welcome change.
All Max could do for the next week was experiment with how far she could go. She made it past an hour, that was the first milestone. Then two. Then four. Then twelve. Each time she tried to rewind, she inched further and further towards a realm of infinite possibilities. It was really exciting, but also terrifying. How far can I go back before my head explodes, my heart stops, or my lungs burst? It was always a risk. Every time she held up her hand and watched as broken bottles rebuilt themselves and cars flew backwards at high speeds was a dance with death. But she had to take it. For Chloe’s sake.
After rewinding time came freezing time, which was an entirely different beast. She didn’t even know where to begin, or even how to begin. At first she thought it was tied to trauma: the only time she was really able to freeze time was when Kate had jumped off of the roof of the girls dorms. So, her only idea was to try and remember the most traumatic things she had experienced.
Memories flashed before her eyes. Kate, lifeless and dead after Max couldn’t find the right words to save her. Mark Jefferson snapping his pictures as Max lay still on the cold concrete floor of an underground bunker. Every bit of trauma she had experienced during that week, yet nothing could move her.
It wasn’t until she thought of her knowingly listening to Chloe’s panicked screams in the Blackwell bathroom as she was killed that something sparked.
The one memory too tough to bear, too heartbreaking to remember again came to her mind, and as tears streamed down her face she could feel a surge of her power. Her hands cramped, her mind focused on the shrieks of pain Chloe made as the gunshot echoed within the girls bathroom, and the world around her stood still.
At first she felt relieved. She laughed, almost jumping with joy as she walked around her backyard, birds and rain frozen in the air. But the more she moved, the more she felt wrong. Something within her felt twisted, almost destroyed. Soon each step felt like she was fighting a battle she couldn’t win. She collapsed onto the ground, her eyes feeling as if they had just been sprayed with tear gas and her entire body feeling like it was collapsing in on itself.
And then, nothing. Darkness. She awoke an hour later, face first in the wet grass of her backyard, rain pattering on her jacket, feeling like she was just hit by a truck.
7:24 PM
“I hate you, you know.” The blurred Max stood to her feet and in front of the bench as she looked down on her. “We all do. Every one of us you trapped in this fucking brain of yours hates you in one way or the other.”
Max simply nodded. “You’ve told me that a lot.”
Her blurred self scoffed before crossing her arms, staring down at Max’s face. “At least you know this is how it has to be. At least you’ve fucking grown enough to realize what you did to all of us. All of you.”
“This supposed to be a pep talk? You’re getting your wish soon enough. Just… let me have this, okay?”
“Let you have this. Let you… have this. After you left me in that bathroom to cry while my best fucking friend bled out. Let you have a moment to yourself after all the shit you did to us.” The blurred Max paused, then sighed. “It’s times like these where I want to fucking punch you. Hard. And if I still had a body to do that with, I would.”
Max couldn’t help but let out a chuckle. The thought of herself being beaten to a pulp by her past self was, at the very least, deserved. “How long until it happens and you finally have the power to beat the shit out of me? I bet you’re just counting down the days, right?”
The blurred Max didn’t answer, instead simply staring back down at Max. Then, she was gone. Her body faded into the sky, and Max was left alone on the park bench.
8:12 PM
Chloe,
By the time you read this you’ll have already figured out what happened. I’m sorry for everything I did wrong. Every night I thought of how fucking horrible of a person I was for never trying to reach out. I always had nightmares about how much you hate me, and how much I deserved you hating me. I can’t bear the thought of you being alone because of me anymore. I hope that, at the very least, you’re happy. I don’t ever want you to live in a world where you feel like you’re trapped and alone.
Please don’t look for me, Chloe. All I’ll do is make things worse for you, I have ever since I left. You don’t deserve to drag me along in your life when you already have someone who cares about you. Please just live your life. Go wherever your heart takes you, stay happy. That’s the least that you deserve.
I love you Chloe.
Max
Max lifted her pencil off of the paper and looked down at it. Slowly, tears dripped from her face onto her writing, blurring the crisp blue lines each sentence sat on to a drowned grey. The realization she would probably never see her again had been in the back of her mind for weeks, ever since she jumped through the photo. But it was a risk that she had to - wanted to - take. Chloe couldn’t stay alone anymore. The idea of her in pain wasn’t worth considering if there was another option.
As she folded the letter and shoved it into her jacket, she noticed a glow within the park. A fire, with a large smoke column bellowing out of it in the distance. And as that column went up, as the sound of burning trees filled her ears, she smiled. It wasn’t a smile of joy or happiness. It was a smile of content. Knowing that Chloe had connected with Rachel made her think this plan wasn’t so bad after all.