Chapter Text
1:37am
Alison Created Group 'Why Is This My Life'
Alison added Thomas
Alison: I hate this place
Thomas: A group chat? Just for us? Oh Alison, I knew this day would one day come.
Alison: shit
Alison added Mike
Alison added Cap
Alison added Pat
Alison added Mary
Alison added Kitty
Alison added Julian
Alison added Robin
Alison added Humphrey
Alison added Fanny
Alison: is that everyone?
Mike: Ally, did you add Thomas before everyone else?
Mike: and... is this really,,,, them?
Mike: how does that even work?
Alison: I thought I added everyone else :( it's not my fault it's 1am
Alison: and yeah
Cap: so what's all this then?
Cap: Alison, why did you make this thing?
Alison: so I can tell you to shut the hell up when I want to sleep
Alison: like now
Alison: shut the hell up I want to sleep
Fanny: I will not take this kind of language, and it is hardly our fault that we do not sleep anymore, Alison...
Mike: wow those dots are pretty ominous huh
Alison: the ellipses?
Mike: probably
Alison: I thought you were asleep mike
Mike: yeah I was but then I think I got bored in my sleep and you're awake too
Alison: god, if I knew inheriting a house would be this stressful, I wish I stayed with my parents
Mike: Ally, your parents died like a decade ago
Alison: exactly
Alison: I wish I never took this house sometimes
Mary: ah but the ghosts ares deads nows
Julian: you know, you'd think that the phone would autocorrect them
Julian: it reminds me of a time god it must have been years ago, my wife was there too
Julian: it was just us plus this fabulous guy
Fanny: I will not tolerate this kind of behaviour in my house!
Alison: irs not your house though
Mike: irs
Mary: irs
Alison: for gods sake
Mary: W I T C H C R A F T
Mary: R E N O U N C E S A T A N
Alison: haven't I already done this?
Julian: you're no fun, are you?
Cap Changed The Subject To 'Important Information Only'
Julian: you're even less fun
Julian: you know, this reminds me of fondue
Julian: or not, if ya catch my drift ;)
Alison: I actually already regret all of this apready
Alison: already*
Julian: Margot would understand me
Julian: but she's not dead
Julian: I don't think
Julian: can I use the goggle thing again
Mike: how are they texting us again?
Alison: 🤷♀️
Fanny: why is that woman there? I shall leave this chat if you don't stop
Alison Deleted One Message
Fanny: acceptable
Cap: is no one going to pay attention to the group name?
Cap Changed The Group Description
Tap To View
Group Description
For the love of god, keep this to important information only!
Humphrey Changed The Group Description
Tap to view
Group Description
Don't Lose Your Head ;)
Cap: Humphrey that is uncalled for, change it back immediately
Mike: what does that even mean
Alison: I made a mistake
Julian: she let us have spotify
Julian: Humphrey found musicals
Alison: I made a huge miskaye
Julian: can you type proberplt please
Julian: fuck
Julian: I fucked up
Mike: yeah stfu Julian
Alison: Fanny is going to kill you, you know
Fanny: HOW D A R E YOU
Fanny: I WANT YOU OUT OF MY HOUSE
Fanny: ALL OF YOU
Pat: it's a bit late for that Fanny, but on behalf of everyone, I'd just like to apologise
Kitty: ooooooo Alison I can see you!!! Wave back at me!!!!!!
Alison: hi Kitty!
Kitty: she waved~
Fanny: what is this~
Alison: Kitty is a trendsetter I guess
Pat: oh Kitty! I must try this~
Mike: what the heck is happening
Julian: heck?
Mike: I didn't want Fanny to shout at me again :(
Mary: Humphrey has losts his head agains
Thomas: go find it then
Pat: now there's no need to be mean is there
Robin: what happen? Hid in cupboard again
Alison: ...
Julian: 👅💋
Alison: Mike do you want to move out?
Mike: yes?
Mike: possibly
Alison: I'll take possibly
Alison: I Want To Sleep
Alison: do not bother me unless I'm dying, so I can get the hell out of here before I actually die
~
8:59am
Mike: it's too early for this
Alison: you woke me up :(
Kitty: you're awake!!!! Finally!!
Thomas: yes, finally
Alison: I'm still married Thomas
Julian: and what does that matter? You know, me and Margot always managed to have fun with each other
Julian: there was this one time
Humphrey: I found my head!
Humphrey: djshSHHDHSNnsh jshs:72
Julian: what do you want to bet that he just lost his head?
Pat: I think everyone heard it mate
Julian: non of you are any fun
Mary: non
Kitty: sjshsgshs
Julian: >:(
Cap: now who's no fun?
Cap: JULIAN TURN THAT BACK ON THIS INSTANT
Cap: I AM YOUR RANKING OFFICER
Cap: ALISON HE TURNED OFF MY TANKS
Alison: Julian I swear to god I am going to kill you
Julian: sounds like something someone said to me many years ago ;)
Pat: you are aware that we are dead, right Alison?
Alison: yes, Pat, I am very much aware of that
Mary: or does you bes
Alison: thanks Mary but yes I am fairly certain
Robin: death is same as live. No difference. Only hiding.
Alison: and scaring me out of my skin
Robin: yeah haha
Mary: so yous be sures wes be ghosts???
Alison: ...yeah
Mary: we bes witchcraft
Mary Changed The Subject To
Ghosts?? In MY gc?? More Likely Than You Think
Alison: sigh
Alison: what have I done