Work Text:
Rain is the only thing Taehyung can hear.
How the water sounds once it hits a surface. The loud impact it has.
He wonders if the sky was crying just for him, he wonders if it can see all the pain he's in.
The sounds reminds him of that one night….. the night that he will never forget.
"Hyung, if I can't ever be there for you, promise me one thing."
The touch of Jungkook was different that night. The warmth that Taehyung loved was slowly fading away.
The thought of losing Jungkook was something Taehyung never wanted to think about but after was Jungkook said. That thought never left his mind.
"Kookie, what are you talking about?"
Heartbreak is the only thing Taehyung can feel.
"Hyung, you know that I won't always be here. The treatment costs too much and we can't afford it."
"Don't say that, you know that you can make it. Remember, you said when you get better, we'll be able to get married."
Pain….. was the only feeling Taehyung knew too well.
Happiness……
Happiness….
Is there even such a thing?
"Taehyung, promise me that after I leave, you'll be happy. That you'll move on and fall in love with someone that'll take care of you."
..Rain..
Rain reminds him of the tears he cried that night. How it sounded when the tears hit the notebook. The thumps that could only be heard if you stayed quiet enough.
"How can I be happy without you?!! You were the only reason I smiled."
"How can I love someone that isn't you! I never wanted to find someone else!! I ONLY WANTED YOU!"
Thump
Sadness was something he was too familiar with. It was a feeling he felt so many times before he met Jungkook.
Jungkook, the angel that left heaven just to be with Taehyung and show him real love. Show him that there's still hope.
But now he's gone
..Rain..
Taehyung believes that the rain shows all the memories that he could've had with Jungkook if he didn't leave.
All the memories that could've been if he saved Jungkook.
All he could remember was the night sky during Jungkook's last day. How pretty it was but still so scary it was.
"I know you wouldn't be proud of what I'm doing, gukkie."
"I know that you would tell me to hold on and to wait for a new day to come. But nothing is changing."
Nothing can improve this situation, Taehyung thinks.
"I still have your clothes, gukkie. Whenever I miss you too much, I wear one of your hoodies and sleep in them so I can feel you around me."
Nobody says anything to Taehyung, they don't want to make it worse. They try to not remind Taehyung about Jungkook cause they knew that Taehyung wouldn't be able to handle it.
"Jimin wanted me to move apartments since I can barely afford to live there now that you're not my roommate anymore. I told him that I won't leave. Not when I have all of your stuff there."
Ring….Ring….Ring….
"Baby , please don't do this. I know you miss me. I miss you too but please don't."
"I don't know what to do anymore, gukkie. I barely eat anything now. Everything I crave just reminds me of all the late night snacks we had together, all the dinners we had during our hard times."
"Tae, you have so much happiness waiting for you at the end of this."
"You're probably looking down at me and telling me that I shouldn't give up. But I can't live like this anymore. I can't keep on going through this pain."
Slowly, Taehyung goes up the bridge. The bridge where he first met Jungkook. The first time he saw someone who wasn't afraid to say what he thinks.
"You're gonna jump?" Taehyung turns around and sees a tall, broad, and emo looking guy.
"It's none of your business, leave please." He says as he starts to take off his shoes.
"You know I could re-enact that scene from Titanic. I'll be your Jack, if you want."
"What are you talking about??"
"You know Titanic, right? The movie about the ship that went down and where Rose and Jack had sex in a car."
"Look…." Taehyung waits for the stranger to say his name.
"Jungkook"
"Look, Jungkook. I don't like that you're doing this so please leave."
"I won't leave. I'm gonna stay and be your Jack."
Ring….Ring….Ring….
"I remember the night that you stopped me from jumping. It was funny when you kept on talking about Titanic. I didn't realize we would have the same fate as Rose and Jack."
"Baby, don't."
"You know, I don't think I ever told you why I was there that night. I was there after I got into a argument with my stepmom about my major. She didn't think I would earn money if I became a writer, she was right."
Taehyung slowly gets out all of his story ideas from his bag.
"I haven't been able to write anything. I keep on missing when you used to bother me while I was writing."
Slowly, he drops each of them into the water
Splash
"If I changed into business, maybe I would've been able to pay your for your treatment and you would still be with me."
"It's all my fault, you're not with me anymore."
"It's not, it's no one's fault about what happened to me. It was just time for me to leave."
"Hahahaha, I feel like everyone is looking at me and thinking I'm crazy cause I'm talking to myself."
"I can't believe I'm back here"
RING….RING….RING….
"Gukkie, please forgive me for breaking our promise."
"Baby…."
"I love you."
~~~~~~~~~~
"This is Kim Taehyung's voicemail, if you're hearing this that means I lost the fight. Jimin, if this is you calling me, I'm in a better place now. I don't want you to be like me when I lost Gukkie. I'm with him,now. I didn't think that I would pass down my pain to another person. If you become like me, please show me what would've happened if I kept on fighting."
The only thing left on the bridge was his shoes and letter.
Life is so bittersweet.
People say that after all the bad things end, that you'll have good things happen to you.
Lies are what they tell you.
The only happiness I'll have is when I'm back with him
When I'm back with the only person who understands me