Chapter Text
Felix liked to think that he knew Sylvain better than anyone else. He knew why Sylvain behaved the way he did, though he couldn't agree with it. The generic compliments, the fake smile that never reached his eyes, the empty promises- it was just a part of his act. All a ruse to catch another unknowing victim off guard, only to play around with them until he got bored and then push them aside.
He knew this, which is why he didn't pay much mind whenever he saw Sylvain talking to another random girl. Not that it didn't bother Felix- it frustrates him to no end how Sylvain toys with other people. Sylvain's philandering was no secret, he's always been upfront about it with the other person from the beginning. Sylvain had no real feelings for them, which as selfish as it was, made Felix feel relieved.
When Felix saw him smiling and laughing with Claude, he felt his gut twist. It wasn't like all the other times he saw Sylvain flirting with random girls. This somehow struck differently. Sylvain had a genuine smile, the one he showed to him, Ingrid, and the boar. It shouldn't bother him who Sylvain spent his time with, that was his choice. He should just brush it off like he did any other time. Still, seeing them get along so well didn't sit right with him- it evoked an ugly emotion, one he didn't want to admit.
The first time he had seen them together, was shortly after the mission to retrieve the Lance of Ruin. Although Sylvain acted as if everything was normal, Felix knew he was quietly suffering. He had always been like this. Even as kids, Sylvain wouldn't utter a single complaint about the abuse at home. Whenever he would try to ask about his wounds, he always brushed it off with a sad smile and told him everything was just fine. That the bruises an scratches were merely the result of tripping or falling.
The others in their class seemed to be convinced by Sylvain's perfectly constructed facade, but Felix saw the darkness in his eyes, heard the strain in his voice. He seemed so tired. Yet, no matter how many times Felix tried to comfort him, to talk to him, to help in any possible way that he could, Sylvain would just smile at him and continue as normal. As if he wasn't practically forced to kill his own flesh and blood- no matter how vile Miklan was, it still must have been horrible. He would keep lying and telling him he's fine. This continued for the couple weeks following their mission, when one day he spotted Sylvain sitting with Claude on a bench near the classrooms. He thought it was odd to see the two of them together, especially when they've barely talked previously. Even more curious, was that he could see Sylvain seemed much more relaxed than he had been these past two weeks. He saw what was probably the first smile that wasn't clearly forced since when they had received the mission assignment.
He has never felt so distraught.
It didn't make any sense to feel that way, and it was unfair to Sylvain. He should have been glad to see Sylvain start to recover, but he wanted to be that support for him. While he tried so hard to get Sylvain to open up to him, it took Claude a single conversation for what Felix couldn't manage to do these entire two weeks.
The days following, it seemed that whenever he saw Sylvain, Claude was sure to be by his side. Always laughing and smiling. Wasn't Claude being a bit too friendly? He hadn't even had the chance to spend time with Sylvain alone, and he was supposed to be Sylvain's closest friend.
Another couple days pass, and Felix was appalled to see Claude sitting next to Sylvain.. in his spot at the usual table in the dining hall. First his time with Sylvain is stolen, and now even the one moment he could spend with him during dinner was taken from him too.
Ingrid and Dimitri were already immersed in conversation with Claude and Sylvain. Felix stalked up to the table with a scowl.
"Hey Felix! We were waiting for you! Claude wanted to eat with us, you don't mind, right?" Sylvain gave him a big grin and patted the seat to his left, which he had saved for Felix. It's the little things like this that made Felix feel tender towards Sylvain.
"Hope you don't mind the intrusion! I've actually been wanting to get the chance to talk to you too- get to know you better." Claude looked at him with a soft expression. It irritated him.
Felix huffed as he sat down. "There's nothing to know."
"Sorry, that's just how he is- you'll get used to it." Sylvain assured Claude.
Felix glared at Sylvain as he started eating his food. He didn't partake in their conversation, barely even listening to what they were talking about. That is until Ingrid brought up something he's noticed as well.
"Well, anyway, I for one think that Claude might actually be a good influence on our Sylvain over here. I misjudged you when we first met- I thought you were irresponsible and entirely too carefree. I thought you were exactly like Sylvain! I do suppose you two still have a similar atmosphere, though. More surprisingly, I haven't been getting any complaints as of late... Actually, I can't think of the last time I've even seen Sylvain with a girl on his arm! Not to mention he's actually paying attention in class and putting in more effort! It's a huge step forward. I'm really grateful for that, Claude."
Sylvain scrunched his nose and pouted at that. "Ugh, Ingrid, you sound as if you were my mother!"
"Well with all that I had to put up with because of your behavior, I honestly felt like I was dealing with a child!"
Claude laughed at this and flashed Sylvain a lazy smile and a wink. "It seems I've successfully seduced him into loyalty, then~. "
"Who could ever resist such a handsome and charming fellow?" Sylvain shot back.
Although Sylvain spoke this way to just about anyone, Felix saw the blush spread on Sylvain's cheeks after hearing Claude's line. How could they have the audacity to flirt so openly, especially in front of him? Felix grit his teeth and held back the despicable insults on his tongue.
"I'm done here." Felix spat angrily, and quickly dismissed himself from the table leaving the rest of them confused.
Felix went to bed feeling bitter. If they wanted to flirt with each other so much, they could do as they pleased, but Felix wanted nothing to do with it.
At the training grounds, Felix practiced his routine footwork and swung at the beaten dummies. He was particularly stressed after the show from the previous night, and the training dummies served as evidence to his vented anger. Just as he finished up his sets, he spotted Sylvain pop in through the door. A truly rare sight for him to show on his own accord, and even more surprising was that Claude wasn't by his side today, when they had become practically inseparable.
"Looks like you're at it as usual. Need a training partner?" Sylvain smiled at him as he picked up a training lance.
Felix curtly replied, barely looking in his direction. "I'm fine on my own."
"Oh, come one, don't be like that Felix. I haven't been able to spend much time with you lately, entertain me a little? I promise I'll put up a pretty decent challenge."
"If you want a training partner that badly, why don't you go ask Claude?"
"Huh? I want to train with you, Felix.." Sylvain gave him a pout.
How dense. He had no idea how Felix felt, how annoyed he was that Sylvain granted Claude all the attention, while paying Felix no heed. Felix had come here to vent, and seeing Sylvain only fed his anger. He knew if he agreed, he would end up taking it out on Sylvain- even though he hadn't really done anything wrong.
"I was just about to retire. I'm tired."
"Oh, then how about we go get some food at the dining hall?"
"Not hungry."
Felix was quick to put everything away and make his way back to his dorm room. He could see the disappointment in Sylvain's expression, as he passed him on his way out the door. Now he felt bitter and guilty.