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« Sleep with me tonight.
- Do you want me to entertain you again?
- No. I just want to have you near me.»
Char’s doubt was obvious. Haman could have seen it even with closed eyes.
It was also understandable. She hadn’t exactly let him sleep quietly the previous times she’d invited him to join her in bed.
«I promise I’ll be on my best behavior, she preened.
- Fine. Get off me until then. »
She smiled, and made sure to graze his shoulder before leaving. She could feel him shiver under her fingers. She liked that very much.
__
« Take it off.
- You said you’d let me sleep.
- I’m already naked. It’s only fair. »
He sighed and let his pants pool on the floor.
The room was too cold. It was on purpose. She wanted him to huddle against her, to seek her warmth, to make him depend on her.
He laid down next to her, trying to keep a distance.
« You should know you don’t need permission by now, she smiled.
- Don’t mock me. Pettiness makes you ugly. »
I’m already ugly for a lot of other reasons, she thought. And so are you.
« Don’t be selfish. » she whispered.
With a grunt, he rolled over to her side and embraced her, his arms encircling her back. She buried her head in his hair, breathing in his familiar smell. They knew each-other’s skin well enough by now, enough so that their mutual resentment was subtle spice and not harsh spikes. They could just enjoy each other’s presence and drift slowly together, like they were real lovers.
She could feel him sinking against her. His body was tired, even if his mind wouldn’t recognize it.
« Hard day, that was ? » she whispered, thumbing the soft skin at the back of his neck.
« Yes. » he mouthed, his face buried against her chest.
« Sleep tight. You’ve deserved it. »
She rubbed her fingers against his spine, quietly lulling him to sleep.
And like a fool, he believes me, she mused, playing quietly with a lock of his hair.
__
She waited an hour, two hours, with his weight against hers, until he stopped moving.
Slowly, she craned her neck to his ear.
« Are you really asleep? » she asked.
He didn’t respond.
« You’re prettier like that, more pleasant. Probably more useful, too. »
Still nothing. She smiled.
Now I know he’s out cold, she thought.
« Don’t move. » she whispered, stroking his face. « Since you’re so exhausted, this will be a one-person show. »
She shifted him on his back and straddled his unconscious body. The cold was still biting against her skin, but she didn’t care. She was sure to get warmer soon.
Silently, she encircled his neck with both hands, pressing lightly.
That’d be fun, she mused. But not tonight. I’ll keep that trick for later.
Still, she relished the control, the feeling of holding a problem by the throat and only having to tighten her grip a bit to get rid of it.
Perhaps I’ll regret it later, she mused, snaking her hands lower down his chest.
She could feel it rising and falling with every breath. It was a fascinating sensation. It was like Char wasn’t a real human anymore, but some sort of malleable object at the mercy of the sickest parts of her imagination.
Should I really be doing this, she wondered. I’m making things worse.
He rolled his head, disturbed by some unknowable dream.
But then, it’s not like I can seek any lower, she told herself. I’ve already passed through the floor a while ago.
Leaning in, she dropped a superficial kiss on his lips. She could feel his breath against her mouth. She closed her eyes and wondered what he would look like weeping.
I don’t think I’ve made him cry yet, she mused.
She shifted her body carefully, moving away from his face. She had another part of him she wanted to focus on right now. Laying perpendicular to his legs, propped up on one elbow, she started to stroke his cock. She couldn’t help grin when she felt him harden under her light touches.
« It doesn’t change that much from usual, with you being asleep. Since you’re always too proud to moan so soon into it. » she said out loud, taunting him to his peaceful, unaware face.
Emboldened by his lack of reaction, she dropped closer and put her wet mouth on him.
A tremor passed through his body and she froze, his cock in her mouth.
What will he do, she wondered, her mind racing. Will he be angry ?
I hope he is, she mused. I hope he holds me down. I want him to slap me, to pry my legs open, to push into me while I cry. Why hasn’t he done it before. I gave him reasons, too many reasons. Why isn’t he doing it right now. Why is he such a failure.
She glanced up. He was still asleep. Staring closely, she could see his eyes moving under his eyelids.
She couldn’t help but feel disappointed.
What are you dreaming about, she wanted to ask, going back to licking.
She couldn’t help but reminisce. When she was a girl, he seemed so big, so tall, all that she aspired to serve, to become. She’d loved him, maybe. She’d have let him do what he wanted with her anyway.
Then he stopped making her feel loved. Then he left. Then he betrayed her.
There’s always a time when you realize that the people you admire the most are faillible, or liars, or monsters, she thought. He could at least be disappointing in a way I enjoy.
She added her hands, stroking him roughly. She could feel him throbbing against him. She imagined his toes curling because of her expert touches, him telling her good job, good girl.
Did he ever say that, she wondered. Or did I imagine it?
Finally, he spilled in her mouth, flooding her with bitter taste. Slightly disgusted, she pulled out. She could never get quite used to the taste.
Suddenly shivering, she watched him, still unaware, tainted by his own come. She’d have to clean him up before he woke up.
There was still fun to be had tomorrow, after all.
__
« You did something to me. When I was sleeping.
- You delusional fool. »
He knew she was lying. She could tell. His hands were clenched, even if he was careful not to put them her. His tone was serious, authoritative. He was ready to be furious. However, he still had doubt. His lip was quivering ever so slightly, his eyes were moving too fast. It was a beautiful melding of conflicting emotions.
How delightful, she couldn’t help but think, drinking up his confusion. That was the most enjoyable part of the plan, in her opinion. The part she’d enjoy remembering later, in a moment of either boredom or solitude.
« How could you.
- Assuming that I’ve done anything, and that debate is still open... »
She twirled her hair with one finger, containing a grin.
« I just put my lips together, and blew. »
Now he got it, she thought, watching his face twist with disgust.
« I’m not sleeping with you again.
- Do you think you have a choice? » she said, repressing a laugh.
Watching you squirm before me is too good a show, she thought. Don’t you realize it by now?