Chapter Text
It wasn’t a secret that Dazai didn’t sleep. When he came in to work or laid there on the couch in the office, it looked like he slept, but actual rest rarely came to him. It was something that he had always done, and will most likely continue to do.
Atsushi, on the other hand, did sleep at night. When he wasn’t having nightmares, anyway. Most evenings, he was curled up on his side, bundled in his blankets, or clinging to Dazai’s side, fingers digging in against the brunet’s sleep shirt. He slept a lot like a cat would, Dazai would sometimes comment, but Atsushi always said he wouldn’t know, because he was asleep. That would always make Dazai chuckle, and Atsushi couldn’t help but smile.
There were times, however, that Atsushi couldn’t sleep, or he would wake up in the middle of the night and not be able to return to sleep for several hours. Dazai knew, but he didn’t always let on that he knew. Atsushi would insist that he was fine, that it wasn’t anything worth mentioning and that he didn’t want to bother Dazai. Occasionally after some coaxing and protesting, Atsushi would give in and tell him what was wrong. Other times, he’d shake his head in silence and the matter would be dropped.
Tonight, Atsushi moved before Dazai could even wake up. He’d been restless all night, something he attributed to the moon. It was almost full now, and he was always more agitated around the time of the full moon. His skin would itch no matter how little or how much he scratched, as if the tiger was just waiting to break free. Only it never would, thanks to Fukuzawa’s Ability. Still, it was uncomfortable, but it was just something that the teen would have to deal with.
With a tired sigh, Atsushi pulled away from Dazai’s sleeping form and slipped out of bed, his footsteps muffled by the soft, fuzzy socks he was wearing. It was getting cold, and Dazai would say he didn’t want him to freeze, though Atsushi was pretty sure he just didn’t want cold feet on his legs when they cuddled at night.
He made his way over to the window, where he sat down on the sill, letting his legs stretch a bit so they were only somewhat bent at the knee. Atsushi enjoyed staring up at the moon when he couldn’t sleep, It made the restlessness ebb slightly, despite the moon being what originally caused the sensation. It was confusing though so he tried to not pay it any mind.
Tonight was quiet, and he enjoyed the peace. When many of his days were spent running around town doing jobs contracted with the Agency, going through five stacks of paperwork a day, and chasing after Dazai in attempts to save him from doing something stupid again, any small moments of peace were appreciated. He could feel himself relaxing against the cold glass of the window, even if the cold wasn’t preferable to the warmth under the covers.
Soon enough though, Atsushi wasn’t the only one awake . He could hear shifting to his left, a clear sign that Dazai was rousing from sleep, at least somewhat. The brunet didn’t move much in his sleep, if at all. At least, not when Atsushi slept next to him. The teen didn’t turn to face Dazai despite the noise, leaving his boyfriend be to wake himself up or go back to sleep once he was done settling.
There was a long stretch of silence in which Dazai was most definitely not going back to sleep, judging by his breathing, except he didn’t speak either. After a few minutes, Atsushi was starting to get concerned. Dazai wasn’t usually this quiet, even when they were together like this. He finally turned to look at the other male, mouth open slightly to speak, but he froze when their gazes met.
“...Dazai-san?”
Dazai wasn’t enveloped in the moonlight like Atsushi was, yet the way the light hit his eyes made them shine through the darkness of the room like a mirror. Some strands of his hair were highlighted as well, chocolate brown contrasting from the almost-black shadows, and Atsushi had the urge to walk over to him and run his fingers through those soft locks.
Atsushi watched as Dazai shifted slightly, giving him a warm smile. “Why don’t you come back to bed, Atsushi-kun,” the brunet asked softly as he patted the spot next to him in bed. Atsushi couldn’t help but return the smile and turn, sliding himself off of the window sill.
“Of course, Dazai-san. I hope I didn’t wake you up.” The teen climbed back into the space left open for him where Dazai was holding up the blankets for him to get under. Atsushi cuddled up to Dazai and got comfortable, letting out a quiet sigh of contentment as he rested his forehead against his boyfriend’s chest.
There was a brief period of silence before Dazai spoke up again, noticing that Atsushi still hadn’t fallen asleep. “Did you want to talk about it, Atsushi-kun? It wasn’t a nightmare…” If it had been a nightmare, they both knew that Dazai would’ve woken Atsushi up, if he hadn’t woken Dazai up first.
Atsushi hummed softly, his eyes opening for a moment before he closed them again. He was starting to get tired again, the warmth around him enticing him. “No, not a nightmare, I’m just restless.” Atsushi shifted in his arms to glance back over at the window for a moment. There was a sound of understanding above him, and he could feel the vibrations in Dazai’s chest from it.
“I see. Well, try and get some rest. Maybe we can talk to Yosano about getting something to help you sleep during this time,” Dazai suggested. “I know it can be hard for you sometimes.” Atsushi felt fingers running through his uneven silver strands, and he didn’t try to stop the quiet chuffing sound that escaped as he turned back to his boyfriend and snuggled even closer to him. He knew Dazai thought it was cute, and he was too tired to do anything about it.
It was Dazai’s heartbeat and his hand in his hair that eventually lulled him back to sleep. The teen slept deeply this time, and wouldn’t wake until morning. Even in his dreams, however, he wouldn’t forget the beautiful way the moonlight highlighted Dazai so softly that night.