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Kiss And Make It Better - Age 4
It wasn’t the sudden, metallic crash that drew Hunith’s attention away from the afternoon tea she was preparing. After all, she was the mother of a very active, energetic four-year-old son - loud noises were frequent and usually intentional. What did cause her proverbial ears to prick up was the silence that followed. There was no more shouting, no more giggling...in her experience, that meant something was wrong. She was just setting down the knife she was using to cut sandwiches when her son’s voice echoed across the backyard.
“Mummy!” Merlin cried, sounding breathless and scared. “Mummy, come quick!”
Hunith met him at the back door, where he grabbed her hand and began pulling.
“Merlin, what happened? Where’s Arthur?”
“Arthur falled off the tricycle!” he lisped, eager to reach the boy in question. He led her to the farthest corner of the yard, where a large patch of cement once housed a patio table and chairs. It was now littered with toys, evidence of the play-date currently in effect. What caught her eye were the streaks of blood that were smeared across the cement. They led to little Arthur Pendragon, who was still pinned underneath the old metal tricycle the boys were so fond of riding. She let go of Merlin’s hand and ran to the blond boy, heart suddenly racing. She carefully lifted the tricycle off of his small body and set it beside her. Merlin lingered behind her, thumb in his mouth and tears in his eyes.
“Arthur darling, are you okay?” she asked, picking him up off the ground where he lay on his stomach. He was breathing hard, blinking away the tears he was trying so hard not to let fall. He looked up at her with a bit of a dazed look, a whimper escaping his quivering lips. She set him gently on his bottom and observed the damage done.
For the millionth time since becoming a mother, Hunith thanked her lucky stars that she chose nursing as a career. Immediately noticeable were the skinned knees, which were bleeding and already showing signs of bruising. The dirt and debris in the wounds would need to be cleaned out, which would not be fun. She took his hands in her own and turned them over, seeing some scrapes and bruises on the tender palms that were used to catch his fall.
“Arthur, does anywhere besides your knees and hands hurt?” she asked, brushing his hair from his eyes. Another scrape across his brow, and a bruise on his chin. He lifted his right arm to show her the underside, which also displayed some scraped up skin where he must have fallen and skid. “Oh, you poor darling,” she crooned. “Did you hit your head at all? Any bones hurt?” He shook his head and let loose a massive sigh, tears beginning to stream down his face.
“Hurts,” he sniffled, voice trembling. She smiled reassuringly and got to her feet.
“I know, darling, I’m so sorry. But I’m going to clean you up and take care of all your scrapes, okay?” Arthur nodded, and she lifted him into her arms to carry him back into the house. Merlin was hot on her heels, anxious for his best friend.
Hunith brought Arthur into the bathroom and set him on the counter. She carefully began removing his shirt and shorts, which were covered in dirt and blood and would just get in the way of cleaning his wounds.
“Merlin, darling, would you please go fetch my bag from the hall closet?” she asked her son, who disappeared and returned within minutes. He handed her the bag that contained an extensive first-aid kit, her stethoscope, and blood pressure cuff and moved to sit on the closed toilet lid. “Alright, Arthur, I need to clean out these scrapes before I can bandage them up. This will probably sting a bit.”
She first pulled on a pair of latex gloves, securing them on her hands before proceeding. She then found a can of wound wash solution and began spraying down the bloody scrapes. Arthur flinched, but didn’t move a muscle. Hunith then inspected the wounds for any remaining debris. She used tweezers to pluck out any remaining pieces of dirt or pebbles, careful not to disturb the skin that was no doubt quite painful. Satisfied that the wounds were all thoroughly cleaned, she gently patted them dry with fresh paper towels. The scrapes on his knees were still weeping a little blood and lymph fluid, but she was sure they would start scabbing over in no time. She used a cotton bud to apply a small amount of healing ointment to each of his wounds, and then covered them with bandages.
“All done, darling. You were so brave, I know that must have hurt,” Hunith told Arthur as she tossed her gloves in the trash can and closed up her bag. “Let’s go settle you on the sofa to rest a bit, yeah?”
Hunith carried the four-year-old out into the living room and tucked him into the sofa with lots of pillows and a soft blanket. She then turned on the television and selected a silly movie to help take his mind off his injuries. She went back into the kitchen to retrieve a few ice packs she always kept in the freezer, and when she returned she found him sniffling softly. Merlin sat beside him, trying to comfort his friend.
“Mummy,” Merlin’s eyes were serious “Kiss and make it better?” He pointed to Arthur’s knees. Hunith smiled and knelt before the blond boy. She kissed each knee, then lifted his arm and kissed the bandage there, then turned each hand in hers and pressed her lips gently to the bandages. Finally, she kissed his forehead. Smiling, she told him,
“There now, that’ll make it all better.”
Arthur gave her a watery smile, and she knew he would be just fine. She stood, dropped a kiss on Merlin’s messy black hair, and headed back into the kitchen to finish tea. As the kettle boiled, she called Uther Pendragon and informed him of his son’s injuries. Uther thanked her for taking care of his son, and told her he’d be ‘round in an hour to pick him up.
When Hunith walked back into the living room with a tray of sandwiches, biscuits, and cups of tea, she found a touching sight. Merlin had curled up right next to Arthur, and Arthur was resting his head against her son’s shoulder.
“Mummy always makes it all better,” Merlin was saying. “She gives the best kisses.”
“I don’t have a mummy to give me kisses,” Arthur said quietly. Hunith’s heart squeezed in her chest, as it always did when she thought of Arthur growing up without the tender love of a mother. It seemed her son felt the same way.
“Don’t worry, my mummy will give you all the kisses and hugs you want.” Merlin offered, flashing his friend a big grin.
“I’d like that,” Arthur grinned back, forgetting all the scrapes and bruises. As she set their tea in the coffee table, Hunith vowed to herself that as long as Arthur Pendragon was in their lives, he would never miss a mother’s love again.
Bad Dreams - Age 7
Merlin and Arthur were seven-years-old when Hunith and Uther decided they were ready for their first sleepover. The boys had been begging them for ages, ever since their school friend Gwaine told them about the sleepover he’d had at his cousin’s house. It ended up all working out for the grown-ups, as Uther had an upcoming business trip that he couldn’t get out of. It was just for one night, but Hunith knew how much Uther hated leaving Arthur with a babysitter. So she offered to host the boys’ first sleepover. Merlin and Arthur had been thick as thieves since they first met at nursery as chubby toddlers, and Hunith knew that Uther trusted her. It was a fact that meant a lot to her - Uther didn’t trust many people.
The sleepover was set for a Friday night. Uther had dropped Arthur off at school that morning with a knapsack packed with everything he would need for the night, and Hunith picked the boys up from school promptly at 3pm. Once home, she ensured that they got their homework done before any fun was had. They had grumbled a bit, naturally, but hopped to it when she told them what they would be having for dinner.
“Homemade pizza!” Merlin and Arthur had cheered as they hurried to pull their books and supplies onto the kitchen table. Hunith supervised their work as she started to prepare supper, setting the pizza dough to rest and chopping various vegetables. The boys finish their assignments in record time, intent as they were on the promise of yummy food. Hunith instructed them to go wash up in the bathroom before they settled in by her side at the kitchen counter.
She set before each of them a tray with a small pizza crust that she had already prepared for them. Their jobs were to create their own pizza however they wanted it, adding sauce, cheese, and an array of their favorite toppings. In the end, the counter and the floor below were covered in cheese and onions and peppers, but the boys were proud of their creations. Merlin had made a pizza in the image of Arthur, with pepperoni for eyes and onions for hair and red bell pepper for a mouth. Arthur reciprocated, giving his ‘Merlin Pie’ a mushroom nose and green bell peppers for ears. “Cuz I like your ears!” he had announced, making Merlin flash a slightly-toothless grin.
While the pizzas baked, the boys decided on which movie they would watch with their meal. They finally agreed on a Lego movie that neither had seen yet. Before long, the pair of them are settled in front of the TV with slices of pizza and salad, giggling at the thought of eating each other. Hunith couldn’t help but smile as she overhears Merlin coin the term ‘pizza cannibals’, setting them off in another fit of giggles.
The rest of the evening consisted of cleaning up the kitchen and living room, playing with Merlin's trucks and reading the comics Arthur had brought over in his backpack. They changed into their pajamas and enjoyed a dessert of fresh berries and whipped cream (Arthur's favorite) before getting ready for bed. Hunith gave them permission to stay up late, as long as they were quiet in Merlin's bedroom. She kissed them both good night and headed into her own room right next door, leaving the door ajar so she could hear them if they called for her. As she got ready for bed, she could hear them giggling and talking excitedly about their friends and what they were going to do over the holiday break. Arthur was going skiing with his father in the Swiss Alps. Merlin and Hunith were going to go to Wales to visit her older brother, Gaius, who had a small farm with sheep and chickens. Their chatter became a hum in the background, before it slowly faded into silence.
Something woke Hunith three hours later. The room was dark, the door still ajar. All was quiet, save for the sniffling coming from beside the bed. Switching on the bedside lamp, she was surprised to find not Merlin, but Arthur, standing there. His blond locks were messy and his eyes were red with tears.
“Arthur? What’s wrong?” Hunith sat up, startled.
“I...I...had a ba-bad dream,” he whispered, hiccuping. He rubbed his eyes with his fist.
“Oh, darling, I’m sorry,” Hunith pushed back the covers and shifted to the middle of the bed. “Come on, hop in.” Lower lip trembling, Arthur didn’t hesitate to clamber up beside her. She pulled up the covers and pulled him into her arms. “Do you want to tell me about the bad dream?” More tears welled up in his bright blue eyes, and she expected him to shake his head no. Instead, he sniffled and screwed up his courage to share.
“I dreamed about my mum,” he told her. “She was here with me, and we were a family. And then a great big dragon came and took her away from us!” The tears started streaming again, and Hunith could do nothing but hold him and rub his back and kiss his hair.
Both Hunith and Arthur were just starting to doze off again when the bedroom door squeaked open.
“Mummy?” Merlin’s voice was sleepy. “Where’s Arthur?”
“He’s here with me, darling,” she replied.
“Are you okay, Arthur?”
“I had a bad dream,” Arthur said simply, his voice muffled by the covers he was currently under.
“I’m sorry,” Merlin said softly. There was a shifting of the mattress, a tugging of the bedding. Merlin had climbed in next to his best friend and was now snuggling up to him. “Mum and I will protect you from bad dreams, won’t we mum?”
“That’s right, Arthur,” Hunith replied. “You’re safe here.”
“I know,” Arthur whispered. He fell asleep and did not wake until morning.
Heart To Heart - Aged 13
“Arthur! Where’s Merlin?” Hunith asked as she stepped aside to let a newly teenaged Arthur through the front door. Her son was nowhere to be seen.
“He forgot he had a committee meeting for Science Night,” Arthur explained. “He said he would be home in about an hour. Is it alright if I wait here for him?”
“Of course, darling! I was just about to put the kettle on.” She ushered him into the kitchen and finished preparing tea.
Ten minutes later they sat at the kitchen table with steaming cups of tea and some biscuits Hunith had just pulled from the oven. She worked the early shift at the local health clinic, often leaving long before Merlin woke up, but it was all worth it to be home when Merlin (and often Arthur) came home from school. She cherished welcoming her boys with hot tea and a snack and hearing about their day before they scooted off to do homework or play video games. Without the chatter of Merlin to spur him on, Arthur reverted back to his quiet, polite manners that he was raised with as he sipped his tea. Hunith watched, taking a moment to appreciate how much he had grown in just the last few months.
He had sprouted a few inches since his 13th birthday just three months earlier, quickly catching up to Merlin’s own spurt. He was going to be muscular, she could tell by the way his shoulders were broadening. He was also going to be a heartbreaker. Underneath the fading softness of a child was the sharp, angular jaw of manhood, the strong brows that framed jewel-blue eyes. Right now those eyes were lowered, his mouth downturned into a frown. Hunith knew she had to tread carefully if she was going to find out what was wrong. Where Merlin would share just about anything with anyone without really needing any prompting, Arthur kept himself guarded and would withdraw into his shell if he felt he was being pushed too far.
“Everything alright?” She asked lightly, glancing at him over her cup. He bit his lip and began picking at the skin around his fingernails. Uh oh.
“Can I ask you a question?” He whispered, never meeting her eyes.
“You can ask me anything, you know that.”
“It's just...I don't think I could ask anyone else, especially my dad.”
“What is it, Arthur?”
“Is it...is it okay to have feelings for...for boys?” He looked close to tears, and his thumb had begun to bleed.
“Yes,” Hunith said firmly. “There's absolutely nothing wrong with that.”
She had thought for sure that she would be having this conversation with her own son. She’d had a hunch for a while that Merlin liked girls and boys, though he never brought it up. Never in a million years did she think Arthur would come to her about it.
“My dad thinks it's wrong,” Arthur told her. “He always says horrible things about...about gay people.”
“Arthur,” Hunith sighed. “Your father is a good man who just has very rigid views about some things. But people can change their mind, especially when it's someone they love.”
“I don't think so, not him,” Arthur shook his head. “I don't know if I could ever tell him that I'm...that I think that I'm gay.”
“Well, that will be entirely your decision, Arthur. But you can always talk to me. I may not have any experience in being gay, but I'm always happy to listen.”
“Thanks,” Arthur gave her a blinding, teary smile. “That was the first time I've said it out loud.”
“It must have taken a lot of courage,” she reached out and took his hand. “Thank you for sharing it with me, I'll keep it safe.”
“I know you will.”
“Is there someone special?” Hunith asked. She watched the blush bloom over Arthur's cheeks.
“Yeah,” he let out a breathless laugh, “yeah, there is.”
“Want to tell me about him?” Arthur's eyes came alive, even as his smile became secretive.
“He's a friend, but I don't know if he even thinks of me like that. He's funny and smart, and he's always so kind to everyone.”
“Is he cute?” The blush was burning Arthur's golden skin now.
“I think he's really cute. When he smiles, my stomach does this flip flop thing. When he’s near me, it feels like I can hardly breathe.”
Just then, the front door swung open to reveal a heavy-laden Merlin.
“I'm home!” he announced loudly, dropping his backpack and box of art supplies by the door. He entered the kitchen and came to give his mother a kiss on the cheek before taking the seat next to Arthur, giving his best friend a wide smile. “Hey Arthur.”
“Hey, Merlin.” Arthur returned his smile and quickly turned back to his tea. But not quickly enough that Hunith didn't see the blush, or the way his breathing picked up slightly.
Oh. Oh . Well, isn't that interesting?
Home - Aged 17
Hunith and Merlin were just settling in to their traditional Friday Movie Night, popcorn and drinks at the ready, when a knock came to their front door. Outside, a summer storm was roaring through the neighborhood, drowning out the knocking until it became urgent, impatient pounding. Upon hearing it Merlin jumped to his feet and hurried to the door, glancing out the peephole before wrenching it open.
“Arthur!”
Arthur Pendragon stood on the porch, soaked to the bone. There was a suitcase at his feet.
“He-he-he kick-kicked me out!” He stammered, teeth chattering with shock and the cold. His eyes were red from crying, and slightly glassy. Merlin pulled him into the house and he and Hunith immediately took action. Merlin guided him to the bathroom, where he helped him towel off and get changed into some of Merlin’s clothes, which were a bit too small but dry and warm. Then Hunith wrapped him in blankets and gently pushed him onto the sofa, where she brought him a steaming cup of tea. Merlin, unable to help himself, pulled Arthur close and held him until the tremors that wracked Arthur’s body finally ceased. As boyfriends for nearly three years, and best friends since they could speak, no words were needed, not yet. Arthur just needed to know that Merlin was there, that he wasn’t going anywhere. This was love, this was warmth, this was safe.
After what felt like ages, Arthur spoke. He told them how his father had discovered the love letters he and Merlin had exchanged over the years, the ones he had kept in a special box in his desk along with the little paintings and origamis that Merlin had made for him. Arthur had never intended on coming out to Uther, and yet in a matter of minutes he was forced to confess everything - the fact that he was gay, the fact that he had let Uther believe he liked girls or even went on dates with them, the fact that he had been dating his best friend for three years...everything. And Uther had reacted the way Arthur had always imagined he would - badly. Uther had screamed and shouted about the family name and honor and disgusting lifestyles, and had called Arthur names the young man would not repeat.
And then Uther had given him one hour to leave. To pack his things and get out of his sight. Luckily, Arthur had had some foresight and had saved scrupulously every allowance, every monetary gift he had received in the last ten years, and had a bit to live off until he could find a summer job. In a few months’ time he would be heading off to university with Merlin, which would be paid for by a trust his mother had left for him alone to use. He would be okay, eventually. He just didn’t know what to do until then.
Hunith listened to his story and tried desperately to keep her own tears at bay. Arthur was such a sweet, generous, intelligent, occasionally prickly young man who she had come to love as her own son. She could not imagine how a parent could ever reject their child for just being who they are, and she could not imagine the hurt Arthur was experiencing at essentially being told he was a pariah in his father’s eyes. Her own son had come out as bisexual at an early age, and he was just Merlin, her baby boy. No different after his declaration than he was before.
“Is it okay if I spend the night here?” Arthur asked her suddenly. “I’ll find a hotel or something tomorrow.”
“You’ll do no such thing,” she told him. “You have always been welcome in this home Arthur, and you always will be. As far as I’m concerned, this is your home now, too, and you may stay as long as you like.”
“Thank you,” Arthur gave her a watery smile. “You don’t know how much that means to me.”
Much later, after Arthur had been fed a good meal and had a chance to settle, the boys decided to head to bed. Hunith had given her blessing for them to share Merlin’s bed if they chose to (it was rather small, but that didn’t seem to be a problem for them), and Merlin had gone ahead to take Arthur’s suitcase into his room. Hunith stopped Arthur before he went down the hall and pulled him into her arms. There were no words that she could say that would make any of it any better, so she put everything she could into her hug. She half expected him to pull away, embarrassed as most young men are of their mothers and aunties showing affection. Instead, he just let himself be held. His shoulders began to shake, and she could feel wetness against her shoulder. She just held him and stroked his hair and kissed his cheek and let him cry.
Later that night, after Arthur and Merlin had been shooed off to bed, Hunith sat in her darkened bedroom and wept.
A Little Bit Of You - Aged 26
“She’s gorgeous. I know I’ve said it a million times, but she’s gorgeous.”
“She is, isn’t she?”
Arthur sat on the sofa in his and Merlin's little flat, six-week-old Aurora nestled in his arms. Hunith sat beside him, unable to take her eyes off of her new granddaughter. Merlin was currently snoring in the bedroom, taking advantage of his husband and mother being home to catch up on some sleep.
“It really is amazing how much she looks like Merlin, isn't it?” Arthur cooed, brushing his finger along Aurora’s soft cheek. Indeed, her resemblance to Merlin as a newborn was uncanny. But then Morgana, the good friend who generously offered to be their surrogate, could have been Merlin's sister. Both had ink-black hair and fair skin and a strong bone structure. Aurora had inherited the hair and skin color, absolutely.
But it had been Arthur who had donated his sperm, and Hunith could see him reflected in his daughter. While her eyes had not yet changed from their current newborn purple-grey, Hunith was sure they would soon take on that rich, jewel blue. And she already had her father's mouth, not to mention his temper when she didn't get her bottle fast enough…
“I never thought it was possible to love someone more than I love Merlin,” Arthur said softly. “And then Aurora was born, and somehow that love has been magnified a hundredfold. I could just burst with it.”
“The love a parent has for their child is the strongest force on earth, I'm convinced.” Hunith watched as Arthur's eyes clouded.
“Sometimes.”
“Uther will come around, Arthur.”
“It's been almost a decade,” Arthur sighed. “He's willfully missed every important moment in my life despite my efforts, I hardly think the birth of his first grandchild will change things.”
“I don’t know, I still have hope.”
“You always have,” Arthur gave her a tired smile. “Why?”
“Because you're my son. You have been since before you even became Arthur Emrys. I love you like you're my own, and I believe that you deserve all the happiness in this world.”
In an effort to hide his misting eyes, Arthur carefully lifted Aurora until her cheek rested on his shoulder. She yawned and nuzzled closer to her father’s warmth, his scent familiar and comforting. She had the same effect on him - whenever he held her, he could feel everything else just fade away until all he could experience was her.
Hunith leaned over and placed a gentle kiss on Aurora’s cheek. The baby opened her eyes and watched her, sleepy but still focused on her grandmother.
“I see a little bit of you in her, you know,” Hunith murmured. “I see you in her personality. You were always so serious, even at two years old. You would just watch the world with those big eyes of yours, like you were deciding what you thought of it all. I don’t think I even heard you speak until you were almost three. I can see that in the way she watches people, like she’s just waiting to see what they’re all about.”
“It’s a Pendragon thing,” Arthur shrugged.
“It’s definitely not an Emrys thing.” They laughed and went back to talking in soft voices to the baby. Merlin came in a while later, rubbing the sleep from his eyes. He had lines on his face where he had obviously crashed hard and hadn’t moved for some hours. He smiled when he spied his mother and husband playing peek-a-boo with Aurora, who looked like she was trying hard not to smile. He came and curled up beside Arthur, resting his chin on his husband’s shoulder. He reached over and tickled Aurora’s tummy, eyes sparkling as she gave him a special smile that she reserved only for her daddy. He caught Arthur smiling fondly at him and leaned in for a tender kiss.
A little bit of you and a little bit of him, Hunith thought. Oh Aurora, will you ever understand just how loved you are? How precious a gift you are? How you've taken the broken pieces and made them whole again, stitched together with hope and joy and beauty?