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In some instances, moving out at age eighteen is a really, really good idea.
Fuck yeah, you’re independent! Go buy a house, you beautiful bitch! How ‘bout a guinea pig too? No one’s stopping you!
But no. When Luke moved out at age eighteen, there were no motivational speakers and there were most definitely no guinea pigs. A guinea pig (and a motivational speaker) would probably die given five minutes in Luke’s living space thanks to the fumes of hair dye constantly floating around. Luke concluded a long time ago that lizards just have lungs of steel.
And it wasn’t really that Luke had an issue with the toxic fumes or the reptiles (well, yes he did, but). No, it was just the fact that Michael didn’t have the decency to fill Luke in on so many things that Luke probably should’ve been filled in on before he moved in.
Example A:
“What the fuck?” Luke screamed, springing from the sheets. The clock read two a.m., but that didn’t have any influence as to how pissed Luke was—there was a fucking lizard in his bed!
“Would you shut the fuck up?” Michael snapped, appearing in Luke’s room to simply scold him. That’s it. No, ‘Shit, man, are you okay?’ or anything. No. Of course not.
“Would you get your goddamn lizard out of my bed?” Luke retaliated, his tone only getting angrier by the second.
“Oh, yeah. I forgot to tell you that Ricardo likes to snuggle.”
Example B:
“Ew, why the hell is there blood in here?” Luke decided to vocally express his disgust once he noticed the smidgen on the floor.
The door flung open, and Geordie stepped through, giving Luke a nasty glare.
“You fucking child!” she exclaimed, offense clear in her voice. “That’s barely anything! You should see what comes out of my vagina every month!”
Luke is aware that Example B probably makes him appear very ignorant—“Wow, Luke, Michael shouldn’t have had to fill you in on the woman’s menstrual cycle, you should’ve already known about that. Do you and your mum need to have a little discussion?”—but it’s really just an example that portrays womanly habits, something Luke didn’t know he’d have to deal with considering Michael didn’t care to inform Luke that his girlfriend would be living there along with the lizard. Michael also failed to mention that Geordie was into dying her hair as well, which brings us back to the fatal fumes.
And there were of course some other small issues that irked Luke, but they were tolerable for the most part, and Michael and Geordie’s arguing was one of them.
They didn’t really argue all that often, but of course, since they’re a couple, they’re allowed a free pass. Had it been Luke and Michael arguing, Geordie would’ve marched right up and kneed the both of them in the balls; Luke couldn’t really do that, though, when Geordie and Michael were arguing, A. because they were a couple so it was acceptable, and B. because Geordie didn’t have any balls to knee, so it would be kinda unfair for Luke to only injure Michael.
It was a Saturday when Luke wandered into the kitchen, whistling as he went. He had virtually slept the day away, so now it was time for breakfast at noon.
“Okay, Michael, but would you at least take a shower?” Luke hears Geordie snap. He curiously peeks into the living room—has the girl finally realized that Michael is a disgusting pig?
“Why does it matter?” Michael retorts. “Your parents—Oh my god, Luke, what the hell are you doing?”
Luke cowers as Geordie jerks around, sending Luke a glare of death. She starts his way, and he can’t help but tremble. However, this time, she isn’t as violent, and she drags him to the door, shoving a clump of money into his possession.
“Get the fuck out,” she demands harshly, slamming the door in Luke’s face.
Luke sighs, examining the money she had given him. Four dollars.
“Thanks a-fucking-lot, Geordie,” Luke grumbles bitterly. He supposes that he’s lucky their apartment is within civilization, and he can walk somewhere to grab a bite to eat while Geordie cools off.
It’s only a five minute walk to KFC, so Luke decides to head over there for some lunch for lunch. He was dead set on breakfast for lunch, but sadly, he’ll be eating the meal that’s originally designated for this time of this day.
He basically drags himself into the restaurant. He’s so fucking out of shape—the five minute walk has him feeling as though he could drop dead.
Thankfully, the lunch rush is over so there’s no line whatsoever. Luke trudges up to the cash register where a cute boy stands.
“Hi,” he smiles. His nametag reads Ashton, and Luke remembers that. Ashton. “What can I do for you today?”
Luke refrains from making an extremely sexual remark. You can gladly give me a blowjob.
“Um…” Luke stammers as he reads over the menu. Fucking Geordie didn’t even give him enough money for a fucking biscuit (which is an exaggeration but the point is that Geordie is a cheap ass bitch), how was he supposed to have an actual meal? “What can four dollars get me?”
The cashier laughs.
“Well, that should be able to get you a biscuit—maybe a small drink with that. Or, you could get a few potato wedges.” Luke’s sure there’s no way his options could get shittier. “Or you could get anything you want and I can pay for it.” With his last suggestion, the cashier Ashton smirks, and Luke finds himself totally wrong because his options did a complete 360° from shitty.
“Really?”
“Of course. You’re cute, and I’ve got money.”
“Um, I just met you. I don’t know if I can let you—”
“My name’s Ashton. You are?”
“Luke…but—”
“I think we know each other well enough now. What would you like?”
Luke ever so hesitantly tells Ashton his order. Luke gives Ashton his four dollars, and Ashton uses money from his pocket to pay for the rest.
“Here ya go,” a voice finally says, and Luke turns around to see Ashton approaching with his food on a tray.
“Thanks,” Luke mutters, heading off to a table.
He curses when he reaches in his pocket to find it empty. Fucking Geordie threw him out before he could get his damn phone.
As a way to exhibit his frustration, Luke eats his chicken in an angry manner.
He’s half way through his first strip when he hears a voice chuckle. Luke looks up to see Ashton approaching in casual dress.
“Releasing some frustrations there?” Ashton asks cheekily, inviting himself to the seat beside Luke.
“Um, yes, actually,” Luke admits. “You see, I don’t usually just wander into restaurants and hope the cashier thinks I’m cute and pays for my meal.”
“Oh, really? I thought you were a Chicken Prostitute or something,” Ashton teases, and Luke really can’t help but burst into laughter—a Chicken Prostitute?
“No, I am most certainly not a Chicken Prostitute,” Luke assures Ashton.
“Well, then what’s with the frustration?”
“This morning—erm…afternoon—when I woke up, my roommate and his girlfriend were having some sort of argument, and she got pissed at me for interfering so she gave me four dollars and kicked me out of the house.”
“Ugh,” Ashton pulls a face of disgust. “Sounds like a bitch.”
“She isn’t really,” Luke explains. “She’s just very…independent and self-aware. She really won’t take shit from anyone. It’s kinda nice sometimes.”
“Hmm,” Ashton hums. He doesn’t say anything else, and Luke really doesn’t want it to turn into one of those conversations, so he carries on with another subject.
“So, I see you changed out of your uniform.”
“Yeah,” Ashton nods. “I was working overtime anyway, so I didn’t even really have to be here. I planned on working until three, but then you showed up.”
“But then I showed up?” Luke repeats. “Was that supposed to be offensive?”
“No.” Ashton rolls his eyes. “I took off because you showed up. Are you really not getting what I’m trying to tell you?”
And just like that, it clicks in Luke’s mind the point Ashton was trying to get across.
“Oh,” Luke drawls, widening his eyes and slowly nodding. Ashton nods along, a cheeky grin falling across his lips.
“My place or yours?” Ashton asks, so confident and almost intimidating that Luke has to stop for a second to catch his breath.
“Whoa now… slow your roll,” Luke says, slowly and cautiously. Ashton takes a deep breath and gives Luke a second to think. “I’ve never done something like this before. How do I know you’re not going to kill me? You buying me lunch could possibly just be a ploy.”
“You can trust me on this one, kid,” Ashton chuckles. “The worst I’ll do is eat your food.”
“That’s pretty bad…” Luke mutters, feigning doubt. Ashton rolls his eyes, knowing Luke’s full of bullshit as he grabs the blonde’s hand, pulling their lips together.
Luke doesn’t even care that he hadn’t yet made his decision or that he only ate one chicken strip or that they never decided whose house it would be; no, the only thing Luke really cares about is how eager Ashton is to get into Luke’s pants.
The boys stumble from the restaurant, and somewhere it’s communicated that they’ll go over to Luke’s since it’s so close.
The short walk to Luke’s place is full of burning sexual tension. Their arms brush a couple of times, and though Luke’s anxious, he’s sure he can’t even imagine how anxious Ashton is.
“What about your roommate and his girlfriend?” Ashton asks once they’ve reached the halfway point of the journey.
“They won’t care. Hell, they’ll probably pat me on the back for finally getting laid.” Ashton whimpers a bit, and Luke doesn’t dare look at him, certain that the boy has a raging hard on.
In only a couple more minutes, Luke reaches his apartment, lifting the doormat to take the spare key from under it.
“Fuck,” Luke hears Ashton whine, making the blue-eyed boy well aware of the position he’s in. Slowly, Luke straightens up—don’t drop the soap.
Luke doesn’t even have the door unlocked before Ashton’s patience is up and he presses his lips to Luke’s neck, hungrily biting in various spots, sucking hickies onto the skin as well.
Luke stumbles through the doorway, hands all over Ashton as he moans in pleasure. The house is entirely silent, and Luke’s glad to know that Geordie and Michael are elsewhere.
“My—my bed or th—the couch?” Luke strains the question from his vocal chords, his mind a jumbled mess.
“Couch,” Ashton answers hastily, his words sending vibrations throughout Luke’s body. “Can’t. Wait.” Each of his final two words are separated by a kiss to Luke’s collarbone.
“Oh my fucking God!” a voice screams. Ashton tears himself off of Luke in zero seconds flat, and both redirect their attention to Geordie, who had, indeed, been the source of the scolding.
“What the hell?” Luke snaps, his mind now fully-aware of reality as he scopes the area. Two adults are sat in gaping horror while a younger boy sports a confused expression—Luke can only guess that they’re Geordie’s family.
“What is wrong with you?” Geordie asks sharply. Luke’s mouth falls agape and he raises his hands in innocence.
“You didn’t tell me your family was coming over!” Luke exclaims defensively. “Why didn’t you fucking stop me as soon as I walked in?”
“We were in shock! You don’t normally walk in with a random guy sucking your neck, Luke!”
Luke can almost feel poor Ashton’s embarrassment.
“Fuck off, Geordie,” Luke groans.
“A universal term for I give up.” Geordie smirks triumphantly. “I win. Now take your boy toy elsewhere.”
Luke rolls his eyes before leading Ashton down the hall to Luke’s room.
After loudly fucking Ashton and scarring Geordie’s family for life, Luke was well deserving of the knee to the crotch that Geordie delivered after everyone left.