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Their first kiss is an accident. A fluke. A misunderstanding. At least, that's what Yamagi will call it. Shino is inclined to disagree, but Shino is an idiot, Yamagi tells him (but really tells himself). Shino has no idea what he's talking about because how on both Earth or Mars can a kiss like that be an accident?
Shino comes back from the mission bruised and battered, eyes and limbs heavy. His ribs are shattered and his arm is broken and Yamagi doesn't know if he's going to make it — he can hear himself calling and begging and wailing for help before he can even process what's happening. Shino is alive, though; he's breathing shallow breaths, but he uses the little strength he has to offer him a reassuring smile, and that's when Yamagi scrambles forward, helmet off, and presses a kiss to his lips, long and hard. Desperate, wanting, relieved, grateful — there are too many emotions poured into it to name, and Shino doesn't have the energy to draw him in closer, but he thinks, mind hazy, he should have done this before he left. Probably would have if there were no physical barriers between them.
He returns the kiss with his last ounce of strength before the world goes black and he's collapsing against Yamagi, head lulling onto his shoulder. The blood dripping down his forehead stains Yamagi's jacket, seeping into the green fabric.
The minute help arrives, Shino is still draped over him, a heavy weight. Yamagi cannot bear to move an inch.
---
Recovering takes quite some time, but day by day and week by week, he gets better. Orga has him under strict orders confining him to bed rest, which Shino isn't exactly thrilled about, but Eugene comes and entertains him while Yamagi stays by his side and keeps him company, so much so that he dozes off right in his chair more than once. There's this one time he's sitting close enough to slump down against Shino's chest, hair falling into his eyes; it's enough to make Shino wince on contact, but that doesn't stop him from kissing the crown of Yamagi's head as he sleeps, a rare secret that he'd prefer to lock away and keep to himself.
Some of his memories are trapped in a thick fog, little more than stray fragments, but the important things are there, and he'll tell Yamagi how he feels. He'll tell him. When Shino was trapped in a corner and staring down death in the eye, his last thoughts were of Yamagi and missed chances. Shino thought he understood before then, but after? After enduring a close call on that scale, he can't help but feel that he's never been more sure of anything in his entire life.
Yamagi murmurs his name in his sleep and nuzzles into the thick blankets as Shino looks down at him, eyes half-lidded and unbearably fond. Soon.
---
"So," Shino says, a thoughtful look in his eyes and a small smile curving his lips. Things are more or less returning to the normalcy they're both used to, Yamagi working on tweaks and repairs with a wrench, turned away from him while Shino hums with content and watches. Yamagi's hair has gotten longer with the passage of time, long enough to tie up. It's cute, Shino thinks. He's cute.
"... So?" Yamagi responds, a hesitant question in his voice. He doesn't bother turning around.
"So, you kissed me," Shino blurts out, and all of a sudden Yamagi is coughing and sputtering and the tips of his ears are bright red. It's rather adorable, actually, but Yamagi immediately whips his head around with a horror-stricken expression on his burning face. Shino almost, almost feels guilty.
"Where did that come... It's not like... I didn't... I." Yamagi stutters, wide-eyed with embarrassment. Shino's smile just widens.
"I like you, too, Yamagi," Shino answers, easily orbiting closer, close enough to more or less invade Yamagi's personal space. Yamagi looks frozen, too shocked to move, panicked, even. Shino could reach out and cup his pink cheeks, if he wanted to, but he presses down on that urge. Not yet. Not yet.
"How did... since... why," Yamagi asks. Demands, really, at a loss. Shino doesn't understand the question. What is there not to like? How does Yamagi not see how easy it is?
"I just do," Shino finally says with a tilt of the head, puzzled. "Is that so hard to believe?"
"Yes." Yamagi sounds completely and utterly helpless.
"Can I show you, then?"
"Can you... what."
"Yamagi." Shino's lips straighten into a serious line, eyebrows knit. He allows himself to move in just a little bit closer, not close enough to dare trap him, but close enough to make his intentions clear. Surprisingly, Yamagi doesn't back away. Although it's unconscious, Shino swears Yamagi leans in, waiting for something he still doesn't seem to believe is not a fever dream.
Yamagi opens his mouth, closes it, and then the discussion is over. Shino backs him against the nearest machine and kisses him nice and slow, more chaste than he's used to. Yamagi's breathing picks up, a gasp against Shino's lips, and he doesn't kiss back so much as melts underneath him, arms coming up to loop around Shino's neck. It lasts all of ten seconds, but it's enough to make his heartbeat stutter. When he pulls away, Yamagi's eyes are closed, only opening when Shino rests a large hand on a flushed cheek.
With a crooked smile and a hand running through his hair, Shino mumbles, "Sorry to keep you waiting." His voice is so soft it's like he's telling a secret, but it's a sincere apology. Yamagi isn't gaping at him anymore, but it still takes him a minute to find the right words, and for once, Shino doesn't break the silence. He gives him time.
"How long? How long have you known?" Yamagi's voice cracks.
Shino laughs again, indescribably warm, and Yamagi just stares at him in hopeless confusion before Shino replies, "Don't know. Eugene told me I'm an idiot, though. I think that helped drive it in."
Yamagi turns even redder, dipping his head so the bangs in his eyes hide his expression. Shino reaches to push them back, to get a good look at him, not for the first time.
"What I mean," Shino presses on, "is thanks for liking an idiot like me. There's no one else I'd want more."
Finally, finally, Yamagi smiles a smile that just might be the softest thing Shino's ever seen. This time, Yamagi is the one to lean in, and with that, the matter is settled, the invisible barrier broken.
---
Later, Yamagi digs his fingers into Shino's jacket and hiccups, "I thought our first kiss was going to be our last. That's why it had to be an accident. I couldn't — I couldn't," Yamagi finishes, his face buried and hidden. Shino rubs his back and understands.
---
Shino kisses him under the stars in the clear sky. He kisses him inside the cockpit of Ryusei-Go, good as new thanks to the work of Yamagi's callused hands. Shino kisses him when Yamagi's fingers are clenching and unclenching the sheets, labored breathing exchanged between the almost nonexistent space between them. Shino kisses him in front of a good half of Tekkadan, much to Yamagi's horror, but there's no mistaking his hidden smile when there's a chorus of sighs and a general collective, "It's about damn time."
Above all the things he could come up with — the stars to his sky, the moon to his sun, the galaxy to his planet — above all that, Shino has to come to the conclusion that Yamagi is the obvious to Shino's oblivious. It fits. They fit.
---
The next time Shino goes back into space to do what he's meant to do, there are no tears. There are gloved hands tangled together and tremulous smiles, and that glass barrier between them — not metaphorical this time, unfortunately — is still there, but this time, Shino settles for kissing the top of his helmet, just because Yamagi's right there and he can. Even underneath the soft glow of green and the relative cover of darkness, Shino can make out the bloom of rose on his cheeks.
"See you soon," Shino says. This time, it's not a goodbye. He's sure of it. He's sure. If death didn't take him before, it will not take him now. Not when he has Tekkadan behind him, and not when he has this, something so precious he won't bear letting it slip out of his grasp.
Yamagi's smile is so radiant it's almost blinding. "See you soon," he says, sending him off with a tight squeeze of his hand.
---
And the next time Shino comes back, Yamagi kisses him, long and hard. It's desperate, wanting, relieved, grateful, and it isn't an accident at all.