Chapter Text
Minho chooses not to say anything this time, and he doesn’t even bother to change into his night shirt as he crawls under the blanket and turns on the bed so that he’s facing the wall and not Jisung. Even in darkness, when he can’t see Jisung at all, Minho doesn’t want to stare at him tonight, prefers to look at the wall that doesn’t care about his feelings at all. Instead of falling asleep, Minho thinks back to all the times when Jisung gently reminded him about the love he had, as well as the mating proposal, and clearly remembers the way his insides clenched in fear whenever he heard that.
Only now Minho admits it to himself that this wasn’t just his fear of commitment or experiencing another loss, but something that went even deeper: all this time he’s been afraid because he has no idea how to accept or return love, how to be someone to be called home. Looking at the way Hyunjin and Seungmin treat each other, how they show their love and care through the tiniest details, seeing how Changbin always takes care of Felix and knowing that Felix’s brightest sunshine smiles are reserved for Changbin only, and knowing that Chan and Jeongin now talk about everything to avoid miscommunication and misunderstanding: all that makes Minho feel that he’s not enough, that he’s not ready for a relationship of his own.
As far as he can see, it can’t always be just one person carrying the weight of their relationship, and he knows that it will take him a long while to adapt, to catch up and be on the same page. It takes two people to build a lasting relationship, and it takes more than love that can still wither with time: there needs to be trust and friendship, respect and the desire to grow together.
Minho guesses that he may be overcomplicating things, but he doesn’t know how to deal with feelings, and the last thing he wants is to be considered a burden, an anchor again. Jisung would never think like that of him, Minho has to remind himself, and yet the poisoning, sticky anxiety tortures his brain once again, keeps him up, makes him think through the most hurtful imaginary scenarios. He doesn’t get any sleep that night, and, from the way Jisung tosses and turns in his bed restlessly, Minho guesses that he has trouble falling asleep too, so, to avoid stealing away Jisung’s precious hours of sleep, he gets up even before the sunrise. He sneaks into the kitchen quietly to get himself a glass of water and grab some tomatoes before leaving the house; thankfully, he doesn’t have to wait for too long and soon Changbin joins him outside too.
“What?” Minho asks when Changbin eyes him with a chuckle. “Don’t I deserve to have a breakfast in peace?”
“That’s not exactly what you call breakfast,” Changbin shrugs. “And I don’t understand how you plan to run after stuffing yourself full with those tomatoes, but that’s not my problem. Ready?”
“As ready as I’ll ever be,” Minho says firmly and he’s not even lying this time.
Changbin just hums at that and, once they decide on the destination, they turn into their wolf forms and start running. Racing together with Changbin truly helps Minho clear his mind, keeps him focused on the task at hand only, and, having a clear goal and destination, he barely thinks of anything else. Running can feel different depending on the situation: sometimes, no matter how hard and how far you run, you still feel caged, or simply end up exhausted and then realize that it actually brought you two steps back instead of moving forward, but with Changbin running suddenly holds more meaning, serves as something freeing.
The sun is already high in the sky when they reach the hill they agreed on, and Minho finds himself really grateful that Changbin had the last word on that, because he picked a place with a river nearby and Minho hasn’t felt this thirsty in a long time. He doesn’t even bother to turn human again and barely restrains himself from straight up running into water and swimming there like a carefree puppy, he drinks so fast that Changbin even looks worried for a second. That expression only lasts for a moment, because then Minho uses his paws to splash water all over Changbin’s pretty face, making him growl in annoyance and burst out laughing right after that. Minho then decides to turn human too, and, for a while, they just fool around until they’re both soaked in water but blissfully joyful for no particular reason.
Minho yelps and then starts giggling when Changbin picks him up like he weighs nothing and threatens to throw him into the river for dragging him outside at such an early hour, but then pretends to change his mind and carries him all the way to the forest. There, he finally lets Minho walk on his own again as they start looking for berries to bring back home: Minho knows they would be more productive at that if they split up and went into the opposite directions, but they decide to stay together, mainly because they’re not exactly here for berries, but rather to just have some quality time together. But, of course, it isn’t all rainbows and happiness, and Minho kind of predicted that, so he doesn’t get surprised at all when Changbin carefully mentions the conversation they had with Felix yesterday.
“Sorry about Felix,” he begins. “He was really upset yesterday because he thought he crossed the line. No, listen, I know he did, there’s no denying that, and I’m sorry it happened, but I just... You do realize that we only want the best for you, right?”
“Of course,” Minho softens at that. “I appreciate that you care, but I would really want to understand myself first, talk about it with Jisung second and only then bring that into the pack as well.”
“I know feelings are hard for you,” Changbin notes, squatting before one of the bushes. “But we’re not your enemies and we only want the best for you. I can only speak for myself, but I’d gladly let you deal with it on your own if it didn’t start to affect the pack. Jisung loves you, he won’t judge you if you decide to open up and have an honest conversation, but you really need to stop playing with his feelings like this.”
“I wasn’t-” Minho is quick to deny, but then he stops himself. “Or was I..?”
“You tell me.”
Changbin continues to pick berries so casually that Minho wonders for a second if he’s doing this on purpose to give him space or actually treats their conversation as something simple. He wishes it was simple for him too, because Changbin’s words only add more to the questions he’s been torturing himself with lately, but at the same time they make it easier for him to speak about something he’s only discovered tonight.
“It’s complicated,” Minho sighs when Changbin shakes his head in disbelief at those words. “I don’t know what to do, because I don’t think I deserve to be loved, to be treated with so much care. I have no idea what it’s like to be in a relationship, I don’t know how to become a person truly worthy of love, let alone be someone’s mate!”
Minho’s never said those words out loud, not even alone with himself, but right now they go past his lips with so much ease that it surprises both him and Changbin, who turns around to look at him with wide eyes. It only lasts for a second, though, and then Changbin is back to looking cold yet serious, and it makes Minho realize why he feels so comfortable around Changbin, why he lets himself do things he’d never do with someone else, not even with Chan.
Changbin doesn’t complicate things, he looks at them just as they are, and to him it doesn’t matter whether it’s his personal life, some inner pack matters or something even bigger. Changbin is someone who values simplicity, and that applies to how he approaches different situations as well, and Minho’s situation right now is no exception: while Changbin treats it seriously and understands that for Minho it’s a deep personal struggle, he also sees the most logical explanation and solution for this problem.
He doesn’t just see it, but also shows it to Minho once he notices that Minho is ready for the conversation, and, for that, Minho doesn’t regret opening up in the slightest. He trusts Changbin, and, even if the piercing truth is harsh sometimes, even if he will question this decision later, for now Minho finds himself seeking help in untangling the mess that it’s roaring inside of him.
“I see why you may feel like you aren’t worthy of love and care, but that’s exactly what Jisung’s been giving you for the past years, isn’t it?”
Changbin waits for Minho to nod hesitantly before he continues, berries long forgotten now as he sits on the ground and invites Minho to do the same.
“Don’t you think that this means Jisung sees you as someone he would want to have by his side? He’s faced a lot of struggles of his own while still respecting your boundaries, and you can’t even give him the same amount of respect. Jisung becomes really patient with you, and we both know how hard it is for him, he is ready to wait and he’s proved that enough times for you to consider at least giving him an honest answer. I know you, and if you don’t love him, things are not going to change just because you wait, the only result you’ll get out of this is hurting Jisung.”
“But I-” Minho begins, but doesn’t know what he’s going to say, so he closes his mouth.
Changbin takes it a sign to keep going, ignoring Minho’s instinct to start arguing or defending himself even when he knows he has no chances of winning in that.
“Whatever your feelings are, you need to talk to Jisung about it. He’s ready to sacrifice his life for you, so I think you at least owe him an honest conversation. As for the mating… There’s no need to jump right into it, but, if that makes you feel any better, nobody knows what it’s like until they experience it. Seeing other mated pairs, even getting advice from them – none of that is going to help you with your pair, because each situation is unique. It looks like we’re having things easy now, I know that, but hell, I was terrified at first when Felix and I made the decision.”
“You? Scared?”
Changbin lets out a quiet laugh when Minho stares at him with his mouth slightly open in disbelief. Minho thinks he’s never seen Changbin truly scared, because he remained collected no matter what happened, so hearing that something as normal for their kind as mating scared him leaves Minho in mixed feelings. If Changbin, whose level of confidence is unmatched when it comes to his ideals, beliefs and feelings, was afraid, then how is he supposed to feel? Minho has to shake his head in order to remind himself that this is exactly what Changbin is trying to say, that there is absolutely nothing wrong with being afraid of making such life-changing decisions.
“It was a huge responsibility,” Changbin confirms those thoughts. “We were the first ones to mate in our pack, and we were all just no one to the world at that time, so I had to protect Felix twice as hard, had to ensure he never regretted that. I couldn’t let him down and I couldn’t let any of you down as well.”
“Thank you for sharing this,” Minho says sincerely, to which Changbin just smiles.
“I hope this can help you somehow.”
The walk back home is mostly silent, with only a few phrases exchanged, and Minho is really grateful for this, because the conversation they’ve just had was exactly what he needed to hear, and now he needs time to process everything that happened. Just like he expected, Jisung is nowhere to be seen when they return, but Minho only nods at Changbin, who is already basking in Felix’s sunshine kisses as they leave into the kitchen together, and goes into their shared room. Minho notices that Jisung’s spear is missing, but, still under the effect of Changbin’s words, he decides the time has come for him to give Jisung the needed space. It is clear that Jisung doesn’t want to talk to him right now, so Minho figures that giving him some time before launching into the important conversation is a good idea – and, as selfish as it is, that way Minho will be able to prepare himself for that conversation as well.
He thinks it will only last for a few days, but Jisung keeps avoiding him, finds the most ridiculous excuses to spend as little time with him as possible, and when they really need to work on something together, he makes sure to stay in his wolf form so that he doesn’t have to say anything. They still sleep in the same room, but barely exchange any words, and by the time Minho wakes up, Jisung is usually already out somewhere. It hurts, really hurts Minho, especially when Jisung acts as though nothing happened around the pack, still talking to Minho with that sunny smile of his during dinner and turning into a cold stone right after.
Sometimes Minho catches Felix looking at him with concern, and he knows that Chan is perfectly aware of the change in their relationship as well, but they all stay quiet for some reason. Minho guesses that Changbin must’ve told them something, and he can’t even blame Changbin for doing that, because, for the first time, they chose to take a step back, to let Minho and Jisung figure things out on their own. Minho appreciates that, and every morning he promises himself that this time he’s going to put an end to all the uncertainty between them, but Jisung always beats him to it, has his own plans.
Days blur together, stretch into weeks, and then a month passes by just like that, with the only memorable thing happening on the last week: Hongjoong, the leader of the traveling pack Chan got into an alliance with for the winter, comes by to warn them about the hunters lurking around and very obviously plotting something. Hongjoong says that one of his pack members wasn’t careful enough and eventually had to take down one of the hunters, and that now the hunters are in rage, so he advises them to stay sharp and spend more time inside.
There’s nothing new about it, as they fight with the hunters nearly every year, but Chan treats this warning seriously, like a pack leader should, and that means Minho isn’t allowed to go outside at night anymore. It’s not an order, more like a request Chan makes on one of the evenings, but Minho still sees it as one and isn’t planning to go against the leader’s word and worry him even more – until one of those nights comes again.
Minho wakes up crying this time, having relived the most shocking moments of his early life again, and at first he really tries to convince himself that he can just fall back asleep as though nothing happened, but, after tossing and turning for what feels like centuries, he gives up. Running into the night has become his personal coping mechanism, a way to handle the stress caused by rare nightmares without breaking down completely, and he is aware of all the risks when he carefully opens the front door and steps outside. He desperately needs to run somewhere, focus on the chilly night air and the way the moon lights the path for him. Minho needs a reminder that he’s not stuck in that night forever, that the world is still moving, and seeing Jisung sleeping on the opposite side of the room doesn’t help him anymore.
It wasn’t easy to admit it to himself that he wants to try it with Jisung, that he feels waves of warmth and safety whenever Jisung is around and wants to give the same feelings back, but now that he did the most difficult job, he can’t deliver those words to Jisung, who still avoids talking to him personally. Minho doesn’t reject his feelings for Jisung anymore, but figures that if he already ruined whatever there was that started to awaken between them, then there’s no point trying to mend it. This is just too much for him, who only recently learned how to coexist with the explosive feelings inside, but he isn’t planning to make Jisung take the first step anymore either – frankly, he isn’t planning to take any action now. Changbin may judge him all he wants for being a disrespectful coward, but Minho believes that Jisung made his point clear and decides to let the spirits guide them onto the right path from now on instead of trying to create new rules to play by himself.
And the spirits seem to answer his silent prayers, because, not even five minutes after he reaches the river, he hears the rustling of the leaves behind and someone’s footsteps coming closer. It’s just one person, Minho can tell that much, and, despite the uneasy feeling inside, he figures he can handle one hunter and grips the knife tighter, all ready to throw it and turn into his wolf form right after. The person then steps under the moonlight and, with a relieved sigh, Minho puts the knife back into the scabbard when he realizes it’s just Jisung. Minho didn’t feel that, because their scents are only strong in the air when they’re walking as wolves, and Chan strictly ordered them all to not even think about doing that alone until the threat of the hunters dies down again.
It feels strange, and Minho doesn’t know what to say, not when he perfectly understands that Jisung once again followed him out of worry, didn’t want to have him walking alone in the dangerous night forest. Feeling things and acknowledging that is already hard enough for Minho to be overwhelmed, and Jisung’s confusing behavior isn’t helping him in the slightest. He shivers when Jisung silently comes closer and takes a seat next to him, and then the realization slowly dawns on him that this might be the perfect chance to finally have the conversation he’s been planning for a whole month. Jisung came looking after him willingly, which Minho takes a sign that he’s ready to talk, but the moment he opens his mouth to say something, Jisung interrupts him with a question of his own.
“You’re not here because of me, are you?” he asks quietly, and it makes Minho stare at him in confusion, so Jisung has to explain that. “After that night, you looked like you regretted opening up to me, and when I thought of discussing that with you, things happened… So I decided that backing off would be the best solution.”
“Wait… All this time, you weren’t avoiding me because you’ve had enough of this pushing and pulling, but because you thought it would be better for me?”
Minho wants to smack Jisung’s shoulder when he nods at that, because this cannot be true, this simply cannot be happening. He can almost picture Changbin chuckling at how stupid he was for believing Jisung would give up on him just like that, and groans when he realizes that all of that could’ve been avoided if only he had the courage to talk to Jisung earlier. Minho feels so, so utterly stupid.
“It was hard at first, but you looked better without me constantly checking up on you, so I thought it was the right choice, but then I noticed you looking at me when you were sure I was asleep like… Like you actually cared too.”
And that is just the last straw for Minho, because Jisung’s voice sounds so hopeful, it’s like he is surprised and grateful at the same time to see that Minho can feel something about him too, and it is so wrong that Jisung only thinks of him and disregards his own desires, that Minho finally shares everything that’s been on his mind for the past two months. He talks about the way Jisung always starts something akin to the uncontrollable forest fires inside of him, mentions some of his fears, though not all, and tells Jisung about how uncertain he is that he can become someone worthy of such love in the future. Minho completely forgets about the nightmare he had, only pays attention to Jisung’s reaction to his words, and, at some point, when he spots those tiny sparks of hope and determination twinkling like little stars in Jisung’s eyes, he loses control over his actions.
Jisung lets out a surprised gasp when Minho leans forward and captures his lips in a kiss, so awkward yet so desperate and full of all the unspoken words, but he quickly adapts to the situation and pulls Minho closer so that he nearly crawls onto Jisung’s lap. Minho doesn’t know anything about kisses, but the way Jisung gently caresses his hair while his other hand rests on Minho’s waist, the way Jisung smiles into the kiss because of how hungry and eager Minho is – it feels right. The kiss doesn’t last long enough for Minho to take the initiative back in his hands, and he barely stops himself from whining quietly when Jisung pulls away with another quick peck pressed to his lips.
“Don’t do this to yourself,” Jisung whispers softly, but he looks deadly serious as he says that. “Don’t do anything that you’re going to regret later only because you think that you’re ready for it.”
“But-”
Minho ends up not saying anything, because he knows that Jisung is right: he acted purely on impulse just now and that is exactly what he wanted to avoid. He finds reassurance in the fact that Jisung seems to have enjoyed the kiss just as much as he did, despite it being so awkward, and wonders if it was Jisung’s first kiss too. It most likely was, because they rarely got to interact with other packs long enough to feel the attraction to someone, but that makes Minho curious as to why Jisung is so damn good at kissing then.
This question becomes the smallest of his problems when he hears the sound of howling somewhere in the forest. They both instantly turn their heads in the direction of where the sound is coming from, because it’s not just a howl: it’s a warning. Minho recognizes that it’s Hongjoong and scrambles to his feet, unconsciously pulling at the sleeve of Jisung’s sweater to make him get up too. They exchange a look that speaks more than words ever can, and then Jisung is pushing him towards the forest, tells him to go warn the pack about the incoming danger. Minho doesn’t need to be told that twice, because to him, just like to all of them, safety of the pack comes first, but he freezes with his heart beating anxiously once he realizes that Jisung isn’t planning to follow him.
“What are you doing?” Minho asks and his voice betrays him, exposing all the worry he would much rather keep hidden.
“I’ll see if I can do something to halt them,” Jisung’s voice is firm but he avoids meeting Minho’s eyes. “Go! Every second counts right now, don’t just stand here!”
This time, Jisung doesn’t ask, instead, he gives an order, and, even though he isn’t the pack leader, Minho can’t seem to find any strength or even desire to go against it. He blinks away the tears that came out of nowhere, but doesn’t say anything as he looks at Jisung once more, as though looking for any signs of hesitation when it’s clear that Jisung has set his mind on this, and then he nods.
Minho runs away from the river so fast that his lungs almost start to burn soon, but the way back home feels two times longer than it was less than an hour ago, and the fact that he can’t even turn into his wolf form because of the need to avoid drawing attention to their house only makes things worse. He’s been running with Changbin quite often, however, and that helps a little, but what serves as the biggest motivation to keep running no matter how difficult it is to breathe is the primal fear for his pack.
He knows that they’re most likely already all awake, because such distress signals never go unnoticed, especially at such dangerous times like right now, and yet everything inside of him still clenches in fear from just thinking that he needs to reach the house before it’s too late for this warning. Minho forces himself to only look forward, but he can’t help it when his mind keeps going back to the river, where Jisung willingly stayed behind to protect them, to draw the hunters’ attention to himself instead.
He tries not to think about it, but it only works for a few moments, because then he relives the old flashbacks again: the night close to its end, the hunters and even the damn river. The images are all so bright before his eyes that Minho barely resists the urge to let out a howl himself and instead pinches himself really hard: physical pain always serves as a good distraction, but Minho only uses this method when all the other ones fail.
Minho’s inner compass is pointing towards the river, once again reminds him about the reasons why he tried to bury all his feelings in the first place, but he pushes himself to only go forward and fails to hold back a sigh of relief when he finally reaches the house and sees that it’s still intact and that everything is just like he left it earlier. He storms into the hallway, slamming the door behind himself, and heads straight to the main hall where, just like he predicted, Chan is already giving instructions to the rest of the pack. They all look confused and very sleepy, but each of them still listens with all the attention and seriousness despite finding it hard to keep their eyes open for long. Chan glares at Minho once he runs into the room, but keeps whatever he wanted to say to himself when he notices how pale Minho is and hears the warning again from him too.
“Are we retreating?” Minho asks first thing, nearly breathless.
Chan shakes his head, and Minho honestly doesn’t know how he feels about this idea. He knows what Chan is going to say, but at the same time he fears that, because they have absolutely no information on their enemies this time, as Hongjoong only accidentally overheard the talks between two hunters and knew nothing about their numbers or plans as well. All they know is that the hunters are after them again, but that isn’t something new, and the lack of information truly bothers Minho, but only until they hear someone banging on their front door with so much force that they all exchange a nervous look. The hunters, however, never bother to knock, so Chan tells them to stay put and doesn’t turn into a wolf either, as he goes to open the door. Their late-night guest turns out to be Wooyoung, a bubbly friendly wolf from Hongjoong’s pack, but tonight he looks nothing like what Minho is used to seeing him. Wooyoung looks terrified.
“They took Jisung!” he cries out, and Minho feels as though he watches his own heart shatter into pieces in slow motion.
This isn’t something completely unexpected, and Jisung knew about the possible consequences when he told Minho to leave, they both knew it could end like this, and yet Minho never stopped praying for mercy, even when he forced himself to not think about Jisung on his way back home. Changbin’s low growl brings him back to reality, and now Minho is more than ready to fight alongside Hongjoong’s pack if that is what Chan decides. If Chan comes up with a different order – well, then Minho is going against the leader’s word, though not for the first time since he joined the pack, and yet this one is going to be the riskiest disobedience.
Thankfully, Chan quickly recovers from the news, and, if Minho didn’t know him so well, he would even believe that Chan isn’t bothered by that in the slightest. He handles it just like a true leader, and Minho tries to follow him, but obviously fails and only realizes that when Seungmin grabs his wrist and squeezes it, as though wordlessly saying that they’ll find a way to get Jisung out of there alive.
Minho wants to believe it, but, truthfully, he doesn’t see a happy ending for their story: he finds it so ironic that all of this happened the very moment they took their first step towards untangling their misunderstandings and strengthening the existing connection between them by creating a whole new one. It’s strange: the uncontrollable fire is burning inside, but for some reason Minho feels his skin itching as though the fire is not just inside, but dancing around him as well.
Waiting for Chan to say something to them and not to Wooyoung is painful, but Minho forces himself to keep breathing, and really appreciates that Seungmin doesn’t let go of his wrist – he knows Minho is going to start scratching his hands otherwise. At that moment, Minho realizes once and for all that he can’t keep running from everything he cares about just to be safe – because safety is just an illusion, and it’s not worth losing the good things.
“We need a plan,” Chan announces eventually, and it has Minho fuming.
“To hell with the plan!” he yells, making Seungmin flinch because of that. “We need to go there right now, we have to do something!”
“We can’t just get in there and attack them, Minho, we don’t even know how many of them are there right now!” Chan insists, growling at him to further prove his point. “This will get us all killed!”
Minho doesn’t even blink at that, though in any other situation he would obey and step back. This, however, isn’t any other situation, this has to do with Jisung and it’s not just about his safety, but his life, and Minho is determined to fight until his own last breath if needed. It is both stupid and dangerous, and Minho is very well aware of that, he knows that the pack as a whole must always come first (and would gladly do the same thing Jisung did for the pack), but he isn’t planning to lose anyone else to the hunters, not again. Not when he finally learned how to accept the fact that his past doesn’t have to have any control of his present and future life.
“Minho is right, though,” Changbin chimes in, still looking the calmest of them all. “They never capture any of us alive, which means that they’re up to something really nasty this time. My guess is that they’re going to torture Jisung to death just to find out the exact location of our house.”
“But why us?” Felix asks and his voice quavers.
“Unless they’re very dumb, which I would like to hope they are, they probably exchange information on the packs that they target, and we had to kill quite a few of their people,” Jeongin responds, looking at Chan for confirmation on this.
“They won’t stop until they take us down,” Changbin notices grimly. “So we need to do that before they get to us. Dying for the pack is an honorable thing, but only if you actually save your pack and not enrage the enemies even more, so I agree with Minho.”
“Grab your knives,” Chan gives in with a tired sigh. “And don’t risk your own lives too much unless it’s absolutely necessary. That is an order.”
When he says that, Chan looks right at Minho, who quickly averts his gaze and follows Wooyoung out of the house. Wooyoung gives him a reassuring pat on the shoulder, but Minho, not used to accepting touches from people outside of the pack, flinches. He quickly apologizes, making Felix and Seungmin, who joined them now, quirk their eyebrows at this, but doesn’t bother explaining that and instead turns into a wolf, pacing back and forth impatiently. They meet Hongjoong’s pack halfway, and this is the first time Minho sees them all in their wolf forms: if he wasn’t so caught up in his worries, he would definitely ask about San’s ancestors, because he looks tiny compared to others yet has so much strength in his body that Minho finds it truly fascinating.
Hongjoong leads them to where the hunters are currently located and Minho can’t hold back a growl when he recognizes the house: it used to belong to a small pack that was most likely wiped out by those same hunters recently. The house, unlike theirs, has three floors, and it has them at disadvantage: they’ve never been inside those while the hunters have certainly lived there for a while now. Minho looks at all the wolves surrounding him and silently thanks the sky for letting them have allies this time: without Hongjoong’s pack, he is almost sure, they wouldn’t even stand a chance against those hunters.
“We need to concentrate all their attention on the first floor,” Chan instructs them in a low voice.
To anyone else, it would sound like random growling, but now that they’re all wolves, there is no need for human words, as both packs understand what Chan says. Minho glances at Hongjoong, half-expecting him to grow angry because of Chan taking the lead, but gets pleasantly surprised when Hongjoong gives his pack members a short nod, which basically means that he’s telling his people to follow orders from another pack’s leader. No matter how difficult the situation is, this serves as a sign of deep respect and trust, and Minho really appreciates that.
“Jeongin, I want you to take Seungmin, Felix, San and Wooyoung and lure the hunters from the second floor downstairs. I know you’ll think of something, but make sure it’s not too risky.”
Jeongin’s ears twitch, signaling the leader that he understood what’s expected of him and his team. Chan hums, satisfied, and then assigns the others to different positions as well, but doesn’t even mention Minho’s role – not until Minho reminds him about it.
“I don’t want you to go inside,” Chan orders. “Instead, I want you to make sure none of them escape through the back door – let’s hope that you’ll have enough time to locate it before they try to retreat through it.”
At first, Minho doesn’t argue, because Chan trusts him alone to handle something as dangerous, but then Chan says that Jisung will most likely be kept on the third floor and announces that he’s only taking Changbin with him, and it gets Minho mad. He calms down just as quickly, however, because the realization kicks in that Chan needs to have someone who is the least affected by emotions next to him, needs someone who will stay sharp no matter what happens. Minho doesn’t fit this concept, not tonight, not when it’s Jisung’s life that’s at stake, and so he keeps silent, only wordlessly wishing them luck with a quick look and a nod before they leave him to search for the back door.
It doesn’t take that long to spot – Minho finds it almost as soon as the wolves enter the house, bringing the unpleasant surprise onto the hunters, who start spitting out loud curses and insults that quickly get followed by the sound of their screaming. Minho doesn’t know exactly, but he can picture what is currently happening inside, and it pains him to even imagine those bloody scenes, so he turns all his attention to the door instead: what bothers him is that it’s open. For a few seconds, he thinks that the hunters might’ve expected company, so they kept it open to be able to retreat, but then he senses a familiar scent – very faint, but unmistakably Jisung’s, and things become a lot clearer for him.
His guess is confirmed when he finds a piece of black fabric, most likely ripped from Jisung’s clothes, and that explains why the scent is so faint – Jisung never got a chance to turn into a wolf, and, if Minho was in his human form, he wouldn’t have even smelled this scent. Jisung certainly fought back, or at least tried to, and Minho takes another guess that the hunters dragged him upstairs through this back door and weren’t smart enough to close it.
It makes more sense to him than imagining that the hunters could think of a plan to retreat – they always rely on their brutal force and fight until the last one either falls or wins, stupidly stubborn yet lethally dangerous. Though Minho is sure the wolves got them cornered for good, he doesn’t want to take any chances knowing that the hunters have already used this path leading outside before, so he turns human again, locks the door and sets up a quick and a little sloppy but still good trap with what he assumes was left here by the previous pack who lived in the house.
It still takes him a while to create, and the house gets significantly more quiet by the time he is finished with that. It can be both a good and a bad sign, and Minho can’t help biting his lips as he starts to desperately look for the hidden stairs, now fully sure that this is how Jisung was brought to the third floor. He quietly crawls upstairs, freezing in place when he spots Felix fighting against three hunters at the same time. That’s not how they expected things to go, and, seeing that there is no one else in sight, Minho almost decides to leave his cover to descend a surprise attack on them when Changbin suddenly jumps on them from the back. Blood splashes all over the floor as Changbin rips the hunter’s throat open, caging the other one immediately while Felix deals with the last one left. Minho stares at the scene, bewildered, for a few moments, until he realizes that Changbin being here means Chan is left on the third floor alone.
Minho understands that it might be because Chan told him to go help Felix, but the reasonable part of him reminds Minho that sometimes the call of your mate overweighs even the strongest leader’s word – that is how nature works, and there is nothing that can help you resist it.
He nearly trips over a dead body when he reaches the third floor, which turns out to only have one huge room, and here, safely hidden from everyone’s eyes, Minho has an advantage – something he nearly loses when he sees the hunter, most likely their leader, holding a sharp blade against Jisung’s exposed neck as he challenges Chan to so much as try taking another step. Jisung is unconscious, and it is clear from just one look at him that he’s already been tortured, because his face is covered with fresh blood. It makes Minho’s insides twitch: there is so much blood everywhere that he starts to feel his anxiety slowly creeping up, but forces himself to ignore it, because Jisung is still alive and his life depends on Minho.
Chan, though cannot see him, feels his presence in the room, Minho can tell that much by the way his ears move slightly – a signal that is easy to miss unless you’re a pack member, a signal that the hunter mistakenly takes for Chan’s fear. Laughing, he grips Jisung tighter and promises to wipe them all out for daring to attack, and his loud voice along with being distracted by the early victory celebration gives Minho a chance – an opportunity he grabs without thinking. Next to the dead hunter there is a spear, all covered with his own blood, and Minho carefully picks it up even though Chan wordlessly tells him not to. Chan still wants to deal with the hunter on his own, tries to come up with a plan, but they’re running out of time: the hunter is not going to blabber forever and Minho knows that.
Gripping the spear so tightly that his knuckles turn white, Minho closes his eyes and tries to focus on steadying his breathing, but all he can see is the rising red sun, the river and himself from years ago biting into the hunter’s neck. He shakes his head to block out those memories, and starts thinking about the throw that is going to decide the future of their pack: he wishes it was Changbin and not him doing this, but Changbin won’t get here in time even if he tries now. Minho needs to aim perfectly and make a flawless throw in order to only kill the hunter – and do it so quickly that he doesn’t get to react with slicing Jisung’s neck in return. Another option is to throw the spear into his leg, leaving it to Chan to finish him off, but, though easier, this option is a lot riskier – there are too many things that can go wrong.
Chan doesn’t see him, but he clearly senses what Minho is up to, and his next action, Minho is sure about that, is the spirits’ response to his prayers for a clear throw. Chan lets out a threatening growl and it distracts the hunter’s attention, makes him freeze for a second while he processes that, and for that tiny second the blade isn’t as dangerously close to Jisung’s neck – but this second is enough for Minho. He pushes back all his past insecurities and problems with handling spears, almost convinces himself that his hand is now guided by the spirits who are willing to protect and not kill them, and follows all of Jisung’s past instructions on how to throw a spear.
Minho doesn’t hesitate when he makes the throw: not this time. Chan reacts to that immediately, jumping onto the hunter and sinking his teeth into the soft flesh of his arm before dragging the hunter away from Jisung. It all happens in a flashing moment, but Minho rushes forward just in time to catch Jisung from falling onto the floor as well, and gently supports his body. Chan makes sure that the hunter is dead, his last pathetic scream echoing across the room before the house turns quiet, and then turns back into his human form and comes to help Minho as well. He looks at Minho with a mix of gratitude and amazement, and for a split second Minho feels like a damn hero, but then sees the blood on Chan’s hands and frowns.
“Why were you here alone?” he questions.
“I sent the others a signal telling them to stay put after dealing with all the hunters downstairs, and sent Changbin away as well,” Chan shakes his head. “This one went nuts, he would kill Jisung without hesitation if we tried to pull off something suspicious.”
“What were you going to do if I didn’t show up then?” Minho asks.
“Doesn’t matter now,” Chan responds, and it is clear that he doesn’t want to discuss it, so Minho drops the subject. “Here, let me carry him, it’ll be easier.”
“We need to get him and Felix home as soon as we can,” Minho agrees absent-mindedly, his eyes following a bright blood drop slowly move across Jisung’s forehead.
When they get downstairs, Minho closes his eyes to avoid seeing all the pools of blood that cover the entire floor but still freezes on the spot, unable to force himself to move further. He’s just killed another human with a spear, saved Jisung’s life with this brilliantly executed throw, and yet something as simple as the sight of blood halts him, scares him again. Minho suddenly feels someone’s warm hand in his, and lets this person guide him through the hallway, only opening his eyes outside where Hongjoong reports that they killed everyone in the house and had no casualties in both packs. Minho gives Hyunjin, who went back into the house just to help him get over the freezing feeling of fear, a weak smile, and gets a tired yet bright smile in return.
As they make their way back home, with Hongjoong’s pack joining them to get patched up as well, Minho can’t stop thinking about what he saw in Chan’s eyes when he refused to answer that question. He knows that look: Chan didn’t just send Changbin away to avoid enraging the hunter even more, though it was surely the main reason, but he also didn’t want to endanger anyone with what he was planning to do. Although Chan wouldn’t talk to him about it, Minho knows it well enough that Chan was going to sacrifice himself in order to save Jisung, he wanted to kill the hunter by giving his own life away in the process as well.
Knowing that any of them, especially their leader, would gladly die to ensure the pack’s safety, is one thing, but seeing it with your own eyes is a whole different feeling, and it truly opens Minho’s mind to many things that he refused to see before. He pretended blind just to avoid thinking about them, but now, running behind everyone else, returning to his home, he admits that having something to care about, having someone to love unconditionally is worth the possibility of losing it in the end. Minho hates to think that it took him nearly losing Jisung to finally understand that, but now, with this newly acquired realization, he isn’t planning to let this fear take control over him ever again.
Jisung may be the reason and the cause of all the horrifying storms inside Minho, but, with all the explosions and fire he brings into Minho’s mind, Jisung is also the only cover against those storms. With Jisung, he feels at peace, knows he can try being himself to the fullest, and Minho only understands now that his inner compass wasn’t broken all this time – in fact, it was simply pointing towards Jisung and Minho was too blind to realize that. All the fear and uncertainty caused by the traumatizing past events, it cannot simply be erased and forgotten just because of Jisung’s comforting touch, and Minho knows it will always affect him to a certain extent, but he also knows that Jisung is the only key that can help him overcome it.
Minho makes the decision while helping Felix clean up Jisung’s cuts and scratches, and, when Jisung opens his eyes a few hours later, the first sight to greet him is Minho’s shy smile as he carefully intertwines their fingers. He doesn’t mention any of what happened, instead looks at Jisung’s bright eyes and smiles again when he finds himself there.
“I’m ready,” is all he says, and it takes Jisung a few seconds to understand just what he means by that, but then his whole face lights up with happiness. “Careful, hey, hey, don’t move so much.”
“You’re…” Jisung manages to whisper, staring at Minho in disbelief. “Are you sure? You don’t have to… Just because I’m…”
“I’m as sure and ready as I have never been before,” Minho assures him and leaves a tender kiss on his scratched knuckles. “Thank you for being so patient with me.”
And when Jisung smiles at him, wincing in pain afterwards, too exhausted to keep up with the conversation, Minho knows that he finally made the right choice. From now on, they’ll run at their own pace, just like they did before, but this time – together, and Minho doesn’t fear the storms anymore. Minho closes his eyes and pictures himself during the mating ritual – drawing a compass on Jisung’s left cheek with bright red paint, because the color red isn’t just for blood; red also carries life – and Jisung is the perfect example of this. The roaring storm inside Minho finally calms down.