now, look at where we are

by trouvailleamor

Chapter 2: 1994

Summary:

“Hello, Sir,” the voice says from behind him. Bender turns around and finds himself face to face with Richard Vernon. “Welcome back to Shermer High. Don’t forget to pick up a name tag.”

He wishes Claire weren’t already inside because she would get a kick out of this. Bender crosses his arms over his chest and coldly regards his former vice principal. “You don’t recognize me, do you?”

Right before Owen was born, John bought Claire a house. Lily was almost 2 and the three of them were outgrowing their tiny apartment. John had started his own garage and was starting to grow its client base. Meanwhile, Claire had just gotten a big promotion at work. Things seemed to be coming together for them.

One day, when John picked her up with Lily from work, he drove them a few miles to the next town over and pulled up in front of a small two story cottage.

“What’s this?” Claire asked, hand on her swollen belly.

“This is a beginning,” he said before offering her his hand.

Claire fluffs his pillow before setting it in his side of the bed against the frame. She knows that he picked this place so he could work on it, but one of the bigger perks was that it was out of Shermer, even though only slightly. West Bethhamp is the same in every way except that it’s not in the Shermer school district, something Bender has wanted since they had Lily.

It’s a Saturday, but John’s still at work. One of the downsides of owning a new business is having to put in the extra hours on the weekend when he’d rather be at home with her and the kids. She understands the feeling; ever since she was promoted to VP and took on a more corporate role at her company, she works more than she would like to.

But they live a comfortable life and their kids are well cared for. Lily just started preschool at the beginning of the school year which Claire thought would calm her down a bit, but instead had the opposite effect. She’s a wild child and she definitely got it from John.

Owen is only 3, but he seems more like Claire in nature and in looks. He has her signature red hair that sits in tiny ringlets on his head. He never cried as a baby and wasn’t as fussy as Lily, which was much appreciated after almost a year and a half without sleep following Lily’s birth.

Owen babbles from where he’s sitting in the play pen Claire has set up in their bedroom. She smiles at him before bending over to pick him up. She bounces him on her hip as his hands fly to her hair. He’s always got his fingers tangled in her curls, and Claire finds it so adorable that she doesn’t mind most of the time. Unless he pulls.

“Momma!” She hears Lily yell from downstairs.

“What, baby?” Claire yells back. Claire learned very quickly not to go running every time Lily yells her name. Most of the time, she just wants to show off something she’s made or found in the yard.

“There’s a car in the driveway,” she says and that gets Claire’s attention.

“It’s not Daddy’s?” Claire says. It would not be entirely abnormal for her parents to show up to visit, but Lily would recognize their car as well. It could also be Laurie, but Claire is curious enough to check it out herself.

“No,” Lily says, and Claire can hear her little feet run across the floor.

“Do not open the door for strangers,” Claire says, holding on tight to her son as she rushes down the stairs.

Of course, Lily doesn’t listen to her and Claire finds her standing in the open doorway. Before Claire can scold her, she catches sight of the person standing on their front stoop and she gasps.

“Oh my God,” Claire says as Allison Reynolds stares back at her.

“Miss me?” She asks, a dazzling smile on her face.

“What are you doing here?” Claire asks Allison, shaking her head in shock. “I thought you were somewhere in Italy.”

“Andy’s dad died,” Allison says, “and we missed you.”

“Who are you?” Lily asks, quite rudely if you ask Claire, but she never was one for manners. Claire rests her hand on Lily’s shoulder and moves so Allison can get by.

“Lily, this is your Auntie Allison,” Claire says. Lily doesn’t remember Allison, since the last time she saw her, she was only a few weeks old. She’s spoken to Allison on the phone quite often, but Andy and Allison haven’t been back in the States in five years.

“You’ve grown up, Lily,” Allison says.

“Come inside,” Claire says. “Let’s sit.”

~~
Bender is covered head to toe in grease and he’s been biting his tongue all day. Becoming a father was an exercise in patience that he greatly benefited from today. His new mechanic messed something up with a customer’s car early this morning. Bender fixed it, of course he did, but it took him much longer than he wanted to.

He wanted to be home hours ago.

He doesn’t think it’s very fair of him to leave Claire alone with the kids all day, but she insists that it’s fine. He doesn’t deserve her, but she disagrees.

Bender is so tired when he pulls into his driveway that it takes him far too long to realize that there is another car in the driveway that he does not recognize. His brain is foggy and he doesn’t think he can deal with talking to anyone other than his wife and his children, so he plans on saying a quick hello to their mystery guest before rushing up to take a shower.

He realizes that something is off when Lily doesn’t come running to the door like she usually does. He hears Claire laugh as he turns around the corner to the living room.

At first he thinks he’s hallucinating, delirious from being overworked, but he blinks a few times and still sees Allison Reynolds sitting on his couch with his daughter in her lap.

“Nutcase?” Bender says while Lily yelps and jumps up. Owen waddles after her and grabs his leg.

“Don’t-” Claire warns, but it’s already too late. He scoops her up as she wraps her arms around his neck. Claire doesn’t usually let Lily hug him until after he’s showered, one too many of her outfits being ruined by car grease.

“Hello,” Allison says casually, as if she hasn’t been gone for five years.

“What are you doing here?” He asks and Lily wiggles in his arms. She always likes the idea of being held more than actually being held. Owen is still holding onto his leg with a death grip, so he reaches down and ruffles his hair.

“Come on, let’s go get cleaned up for dinner,” Claire says, standing and grabbing Owen’s hand. She places her free hand on John’s shoulder and squeezes before disappearing with the kids.

Allison stands and smiles, looking the same but also older in some indescribable way. “You’ve gone fully domestic on me, Bender.”

“It was bound to happen at some point,” Bender says, crossing his arms. “What are you doing here?”

She sobers enough for him to realize that something happened to bring her home. “Andy’s dad had a heart attack,” she says. “He didn’t make it.”

“Damn,” Bender says. “How’s Andy holding up?”

“He’s with his family right now,” she says. “I honestly can’t tell what he’s thinking.”

Bender knows the feeling. In fact, he and Andy had a conversation about this exact situation years ago, before they graduated. “Damn,” he says again.

“Yeah, that pretty much sums it up,” Allison says. “I think we’re supposed to hug or something.”

“You think so?” Bender asks, smirking. “That doesn’t seem like us.”

“Maybe not, but it’s been five years and I missed you, asshole,” she says.

“Ugh, fine,” he says, but he opens his arms and she wraps hers around him. “You’ve changed, Allison Reynolds.”

She hums before leaning back. “In more ways than one,” she says, holding up her left hand.

“When the fuck did that happen?” He asks, laughter in his voice. If it was anyone else he’d probably be pissed that they didn’t tell him, but Allison has always done things her own way.

“Not too long ago,” she says.

“Nutcase,” Bender says, shaking his head. “I’m glad you’re back.”

Allison surprises him when she smiles and says, “Me too.”

~~
Andy got the call early in the morning while Allison was asleep next to him in a villa just outside of Florence. They had planned on having a lazy morning. They had spent most of the previous day touring a vineyard before coming back to the villa where Andy fed Allison grapes while they lounged in the sun. The shrill ring of the telephone was not a welcome one, but Andy slid out of bed, out of Allison’s arms and walked across the room to answer it.

“Hello?”

“Andy?” He heard her voice and recognized her immediately.

“Lucy? What’s wrong?” He asked his sister. Lucy was thirteen when he left on his trip and he hasn’t seen her since, but he calls home often. At eighteen, she sounded much more grown up than the girl he left in Shermer.

“It’s Dad,” she said and Andy tensed. While Andy called home every time they traveled to a new place, both to check in and to make sure that his mother had a number to call him at, he hasn’t kept in touch with his dad. His dad made it clear to Andy before he left for this trip that he wanted nothing to do with him, and Andy had no interest in going against his wishes.

“What about Dad?” Andy said, looking behind him to see Allison sitting up on her elbows.

“Andy, he’s dead. Oh God, it was horrible,” she said, her voice quivering over the phone. “Mom found him in the driveway. He didn’t come home tonight and she was gonna go out and look for him. Oh God.”

“Jesus,” he said. He ran his hand through his hair. “How’s Mom?”

“Hysterical,” Lucy said. “Or, she was hysterical before they sedated her.”

“Fuck,” Andy said, dragging his hand down the side of his face. “Did you call James and M.J. yet?”

“No,” Lucy said. “I will.”

“No, I’ll do it,” he said. His sister is only eighteen and Andy didn’t want to put the pressure to deliver the terrible news two more times. “I’ll catch the next flight out.”

“Thank you, Andy,” Lucy said. “I know that you and Dad weren’t on good terms-”

“Lucy, it’s okay. Go check on Mom,” he said.

“Alright, see you soon,” Lucy said before hanging up.

Andy dropped the phone into the cradle before looking over at where Allison was sitting. “My dad’s dead,” he said.

“Are you okay?” Allison asked as she pushed aside the covers and made her way over to him.

“Yes,” he said, letting her take hold of his hand but not meeting her eyes. “I have to call my brothers.”

“Okay,” she said and he looked up at her.

“I have to go home,” he said. He fully expected her to stay behind, assuming that she wouldn’t want to go back to Shermer.

“Of course,” Allison said.

“There’s still two weeks left on our lease for this place.”

“Andy, it’s okay. They will understand,” she said, an exasperated look on her face.

“No, I mean,” he said, squeezing her fingers lightly. “You can stay here for two more weeks.”

“Stay?” Allison asked. “I’m not staying here without you while you go bury your father. Are you serious?”

Her cheeks reddened as she watched him. “I just didn’t want to assume.”

“Please assume,” she said, basically pleading. “Please assume that I’m never going to let you leave me behind, especially for something like this. I mean, we’re engaged to be married, Andy.”

He was able to smile just a little bit then, running his thumb over her knuckles. “Okay. Sorry.”

“Don’t apologize,” she said. “Call your brothers. I’ll start packing.”

“Thank you,” he said, leaning in to kiss her briefly.

“Go call them,” she said, taking her hand back and moving out of the bedroom.

Andy took a deep breath and dialed his brother’s number, feeling a weird sensation of emptiness.

~~

Brian is reading the newspaper when the doorbell rings. Laurie, who is working on her laptop at the kitchen table, jumps up to get the door. He hears the door open and then Laurie is saying, “Brian, come here please.”

Something in her voice makes him move quickly. His first thought is that something is wrong, but he steps behind Laurie and sees Allison. At first, he isn’t sure if it’s her, but she smiles when she sees him as Laurie steps aside.

“You didn’t call,” Brian chokes out. “I didn’t know you were coming.”

“It was a last minute thing,” Allison says. “Andy had to come home for his dad’s funeral.”

Brian lets out a breath, both of relief and sadness for Andy. When he saw Allison standing there without Andy, he was worried that something had happened between them again. He’s relieved that they’re fine, but he knows how complicated Andy’s relationship with his father has always been.

“That’s horrible,” Laurie says when Brian says nothing. “I’m sorry.”

Allison shrugs. “Thanks, I’m sure Andy would appreciate it.”

“Do you want to come in?” Brian asks.

Instead of responding, Allison reaches forward and wraps Brain in a hug. He brings his arms around her and pulls her close, closing his eyes. He was 23 the last time he saw her, so much younger than he is now. Five years have passed and he’s engaged, about to start his own business with Laurie.

“I missed you,” Allison says, pulling back. “I missed you too, Laurie, but I don’t know if you’d want a hug from me.”

“Sure I do,” Laurie says, accepting a quick hug. Brian notes that Allison from five years ago wasn’t a hugger. He wonders if her time in Italy had anything to do with it.

“To answer your question, I would love to come in, but Claire, Bender, and Andy are all on their way to Al’s and I’ve come to invite you,” she says.

“That sounds great,” Brian says. He misses going to Al’s with his friends, hanging out and talking like old times.

Allison smiles and nods. “Good. I’ll drive.”

~~

Bender holds a squirming Owen in his lap while he waits for the waiter to bring over a high chair. Meanwhile, Lily is talking Andy’s ear off, asking about everything she can think of while Claire tries, unsuccessfully, to get her to sit still.

Andy takes it in stride, answering every question with care. He must catch on that Lily likes to be taken seriously, because he doesn’t talk down to her.

“Was flying in a plane scary?” She asks, letting Claire fiddle with her hair. Bender wonders why Claire even bothers, since Lily will pull at the clips as soon as Claire isn’t looking.

“A little at first, but you get used to it,” Andy says.

“Mommy, can we go on a plane?” Lily asks as Claire lets go of her hair, seemingly satisfied enough with how it looks.

“Maybe someday,” Claire says.

Bender can tell that Lily is about to start begging him, but he is rescued by the waiter coming with the high chair. Owen resists, keeping his legs extended straight, and he giggles when Bender manages to force him into the chair.

He ruffles his son’s red hair before sitting back down. He barely has time to breathe before Allison, Brian, and Laurie arrive. There’s a cacophony of greetings, Lily jumping up to hug Laurie and Brian while Allison slides into the chair next to Andy.

Once everyone is settled and the waiter delivers their drinks, Bender raises his glass. “To us,” he says, which earns him a smile from Claire and an eye roll from Allison.

“To us,” Andy responds, lifting his glass as well. Soon enough, everyone is holding up their glass with the exception of Owen, who holds up a crayon instead.

When it’s all done and their food comes out, Bender nudges his leg against Claire’s. She pushes back with a smile.

~~

Laurie checks her watch for the third time in as many minutes before scanning the restaurant again. This morning, her and Brian, along with the rest of the group, went to Andy’s father’s funeral. Brian is still with him now, Laurie leaving the so-called “Breakfast Club” to support Andy in a way only they can.

Finally, she sees her approach. She slides into the seat across from Laurie and lets her bag slide off her shoulder to the floor. “Hey, sorry I’m late. Mom came back late from the store and I needed the car.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Laurie says. “I could have picked you up.”

“I know, but Mom wants me to get used to driving on the highway before I go to college,” Molly says. Much to Brian’s annoyance, Laurie gets along quite well with his seventeen year old sister. They get lunch frequently, both with and without Brian.

“And how did it go?” Laurie asks as she looks down at the menu. Claire told her that the restaurant has a good salad, but Laurie is leaning towards the flatbread.

“I only got beeped at once,” Molly says, beaming.

“That’s good, I guess,” Laurie laughs and shakes her head.

“It’s better than last time,” Molly shrugs. “What are you going to get?”

Laurie is grateful that Brian’s family likes her so much. At first, his mother wasn’t thrilled with the fact that they moved in with each other before getting married, but Brian convinced her that it was a convenience to live together while they were starting a business together. It’s been years since then and their business is just getting off the ground, but his mother hasn’t voiced any further concerns.

She wishes her family felt the same about Brian, wishes that they could see how happy she is and be happy for her. Her mom loves him, but her dad is still waiting for the day that she comes home without the engagement ring on her finger. Every once in a while, her mom reassures her in Spanish about how “mother knows best” and that if Laurie is happy, she should ignore her dad and live her life.

Brian was surprised to learn that Laurie is half-Mexican and fluent in Spanish. Apparently, most of Shermer High had no idea. She remembers that when she first met Olivia, she offered protection from people who would bully her for not looking like everyone else in Shermer. She didn’t know it at the time, but she had accepted a deal with the devil and became a bully herself.

She shakes her head and breaks out of her thought spiral. “I’m going to get the flatbread, I think.”

“That looks good,” Molly says. “I think I’ll get the same.”

Yes, Laurie is grateful for her mom and for Brian’s family. Molly has become a close friend and reminds her much of herself at seventeen.

Once the waitress takes their orders, Molly clasps her hands and rests them on the table. “So,” she says, “how is my idiot brother.”

Laurie rolls her eyes. “He’s fine,” she says. “He’s at a funeral right now.”

“Right, Lucy Clark’s dad. I heard about that,” Molly says. “That’s sad.”

“It is,” Laurie says. She picks up her water glass and takes a sip. When she places the glass back down on the table, she looks up and sees Molly staring at her. “What?”

“I’m going to be transparent here,” Molly says. “I’ve been sent here to ask you a question.”

“Sent here?” Laurie asks, furrowing her brow. “What question?”

“Mom wants to know if you’ve set a date yet,” Molly says, a conspiratorial smile taking over her face.

Laurie lets out a laugh. She was expecting something worse than that, but the answer to the question was supposed to remain secret until the invitations were sent out. “Of course she does,” she says. “Tell her to keep an eye on the mail.”

Molly smiles even wider. “I will. I expect to have a part in your wedding.”

“My lips are sealed,” Laurie says, but offers her a smile.

“Laurie!” Molly exclaims. “Come on.”

“I’ll tell you soon, I promise,” Laurie says.

“Fine,” Molly says. Luckily, the waitress returns with their food before Molly can interrogate her some more.

~~

Allison is lying on the bed in their hotel room, leafing through a newspaper and waiting for Andy to get out of the shower. He’s been in there longer than he usually takes, but she assumes he’s just processing the events of the day.

Andy spent most of the funeral and the following reception looking after his mother and younger sister. Lucy can hold her own most of the time, but she’s traumatized by the entire event. Andy’s mother is a wreck and had to be medicated for most of the afternoon.

Andy’s brother James is married with a family of his own, so he spent the funeral comforting his young kids who had just lost their grandfather and didn’t understand. His other brother, M.J., helped Andy prop their mother up for most of the day.

She hears the water shut off as she circles the bottom of the newspaper with a marker. She flips it closed and waits for him to emerge from the bathroom. A few seconds later he does, a towel wrapped around his waist and his hair glistening wet.

“What are you looking at?” Andy asks, motioning towards the newspaper.

“Oh, just flipping through,” she says. “How are you?”

“I’m okay,” he says. “I’m glad it’s over.”

Allison pushes herself up to sitting and pats on the bed next to her. Andy sits down next to her and presses the heels of his hands into his eyes. He looks exhausted, more tired than she’s ever seen him, and she doesn’t know what to do to make him better. She does what she can and gently rubs his bare back with her fingers.

“We should go over there for dinner tonight,” he says. “People dropped stuff off, but I want to make sure she eats.”

“Alright,” she says, leaning her chin against his shoulder.

“Is it bad that I’m relieved?” Andy asks.

“What do you mean?” Allison asks, although she’s pretty sure she knows what he’s talking about.

“He’s not a good man. Lucy told me he was yelling at Mom a lot more towards the end. Is it bad that I’m relieved that she’s free of him now?” Andy asks, not moving his hands from his face.

“No,” she says. “I think it’s perfectly understandable.”

“God, this is the worst feeling,” he says, pressing even harder into his face.

“Stop,” Allison reaches out and wraps her hand around his wrist. She pulls his hands away from his face and threads her fingers through his. “It’s alright to feel what you’re feeling. Of course it is.”

He groans and shakes the hair out of his face. He let it grow out in Europe and now the strands sit across his forehead. Allison leans over and presses a kiss to his cheek before climbing off the bed.

“I’ll get ready so we can go over to your mom’s, okay?” She says and he nods before grabbing her wrist and pulling her down to kiss him.

When he lets go of her hand, she grabs a pair of clean clothes from their suitcase and heads into the bathroom. She lets the sting of the hot water distract her from her anxiety. Allison knows Andy will be okay, but that doesn’t mean it won’t be bumpy until he gets there. She has an idea that may help, but she doesn’t want to run it by him until he has processed these recent events a little more.

As soon as she’s clean, she turns the shower off, dries off, and gets dressed. She brushes through her hair, quickly because she hates doing it, and goes back out to the main room. Andy is dressed now, wearing a more casual outfit than he was wearing earlier, and is leaning over the bed with his back to her.

“Are you okay?” She asks again, not for the first time today.

He turns around and holds the newspaper that she was looking at earlier up in front of him. “What’s this?”

He’s pointing at the circles she drew around apartments near Shermer. She probably shouldn’t have left him alone with it, but she thought he was so lost in his head that he wouldn’t have noticed it.

“A newspaper,” she says, unhelpfully.

“Allie,” he says. “Come on.”

“I just thought,” she starts. “Okay, I was just thinking that it might be good for us to stay here for a while. You could stay near your mom and we could be here for Shermer High’s reunion. I was just looking, I obviously wasn’t going to do anything without talking to you.”

“You want to stay?” Andy asks.

“I don’t know if you looked, but there’s a few where the lease is only a year. I turned in my final draft a month ago and it should be published soon enough. There are plenty of law firms around here that would want you, even on a short term basis. But if you don’t want to, then we will figure it out,” she says, talking so fast she almost trips on her tongue.

For a second, Andy just stares at her. She feels herself flush under his stare but she maintains eye contact. “What-” he starts. “You want to stay here?”

“Yes Andy, I want to stay here with you. Is that okay?”

He drops the newspaper and reaches out to grab her hands. “Yes, it’s okay. I’m just surprised.”

“So, we’re doing this?” Allison asks, squeezing his hands.

“Okay,” he says. “Yeah. We’re doing this.”

~~

Claire flops down on the mattress and throws her arm over her forehead. It’s been a long day, with the funeral and reception that followed, and it took an abnormally long time for her to get Owen to go to bed. John isn’t in the bathroom or in their bed, so she assumes that he’s having just as hard of a time with Lily.

Their strategy since having Owen has been to divide and conquer, saying goodnight to one kid and putting the other in bed. As if she willed it, she hears Lily’s bedroom door open and her husband’s hushed voice before the door clicks closed. Soon enough, Bender falls back onto the mattress next to her.

“I wouldn’t be surprised if one of them ends up in bed with us tonight,” Claire says, looking over at her husband.

“I think it’ll be like that until things quiet down again,” Bender says.

“Still happy we did this?” Claire asks.

“Did what? Settled down?” Bender says, laughter in his voice. “Ask me when I’ve gotten more than three hours of sleep.”

“That might be a few years from now,” Claire says, moving her head closer to his.

Bender hums, his eyes closed. “Yes, I am,” he says, answering her earlier question. “But sometimes I wonder what my life would be like if my daughter asked 5% less questions every day.”

Claire laughs at that before leaning over and kissing his cheek. She pushes herself up until she’s sitting on the edge of the bed. “She’s going to be so smart,” she says. “She’ll outsmart both of us someday.”

“Good,” Bender says, opening one eye to look at her. “I’m going to fall asleep.”

“At least get under the covers,” she says. “You were smart to get ready before bedtime. Now you can just go straight to sleep.”

Bender hums again but doesn’t move. Claire rolls her eyes before goes to brush her teeth and change. When she comes back into the bedroom, she sees Bender predictably asleep. She crawls under the covers on her side of the bed and shoves his shoulder.

“Under the covers,” Claire says when he opens his eyes a touch.

Bender groans and slides up until he’s able to kick himself under the covers. Once he’s comfortable, he turns on his side and whispers, “Good night. I love you.”

“I love you too,” Claire whispers back before closing her eyes and slipping quickly into sleep.

It couldn’t have been five minutes later when Claire hears the door to their bedroom creak open. “Mommy?”

“Yes, baby?” Claire opens her eyes and tries to see in the dark.

“It’s dark in my room,” Lily says, holding tight to the Barbie she never lets go of and can’t sleep without.

“Did Daddy put your nightlight on?” She asks and feels John stir beside her.

“It’s still too dark,” she says.

Claire sighs quietly before patting the bed between her and John with her hand. Lily takes the permission and jumps into the bed between them.

“Please try to sleep,” Claire says, even though she knows all hope is lost.

In response, Lily presses her cold feet against her back. Claire doesn’t even want to know what position she has herself in to be able to do that. She remembers her mother’s words and tries to treasure them. They are only this little once. Enjoy it.

~~

“Bender, someone’s here asking for you,” his friend and business owner Will says.

Bender slides out from under the car he’s working on. “Not Claire?” He asks, raising his brow. Claire is the only one who ever comes to visit him at work and Will has been known to play coy.

“Nope, I have no idea who she is,” Will says, shrugging and pointing behind him before heading back to his office.

Bender stands up and brushes his hands over his overalls. It’s rare that someone would ask specifically for him, but usually it means that they aren’t happy with their service. Bender barely slept last night thanks to Lily, so he doesn’t know if he has the patience to deal with an unhappy customer.

“Hi, can I help you?” He asks as he rounds the corner, trying to quell his curiosity and keep his patience at the same time.

“My God, it’s really you,” the woman says, and there’s something familiar about her to him, but he can’t place her.

“I’m sorry, do you need assistance with something?” He’s got his business voice on, something that Claire teases him about from time to time.

“I always thought you’d grow up to look just like him, but you didn’t. You look just like my mother,” she says and Bender feels the blood rush from his head.

“Mom?” He asks, feeling his heart race in his chest.

~~

He gets her into his office and she immediately starts turning around his picture frames that sit on his desk.

“Who are these people?” She asks, sliding her finger against the frame.

“My friends,” he says, watching as she grabs another frame, this one home to a picture of Claire. “And my wife.”

“You’re married?” His mother says, smiling. “That’s wonderful.” She reaches to grab another.

“Listen,” he starts, but she stops him as she holds the picture up.

“Are these your children?” She asks.

“Yes,” he says through gritted teeth.

“Amazing,” she says, tracing Lily’s face with her finger. “Children are a blessing.”

“Are they,” he says, crossing his arms over his chest.

She looks up at him then. “John, there’s so much that you don’t know.”

“Really? Try me,” he says. He feels the anger bubbling under the surface, so he walks around to the other side of his desk and sits in his chair. His mother mirrors him and sits down in the chair reserved mostly for customers who come in to negotiate prices of services. She places the frames back where they go, but Bender reaches out and straightens them anyway.

“Your father was not a good man,” his mother says. “He was rotten until the day he died, I’m sure.”

“You know he’s dead, then,” he says.

“I just found out. I was looking for you,” she says. “I saw your business in the newspaper, I saw the name. I had to find out if it was you.”

“Well, it’s me. What do you want?” He asks.

“I wanted to see you,” she says. The longer he looks at her, the more familiar she looks. He thought he didn’t remember anything about her since she left when he was so young, but he realizes that it’s not true. The crinkle by her eyes when she smiles is so familiar that it makes him feel sick.

“You’ve seen me,” Bender says. “Let me show you out.”

“Wait,” she says, raising her hand to stop him from standing up. “He hurt me.”

“I know,” he ground out through gritted teeth as he sinks back into the seat.

“He hurt me and he always said that he was going to stop, that he was going to try harder, but he never did,” she says. He doesn’t know why she thinks she’s telling him anything he doesn’t already know. “He was going to kill me. I had to get out.”

“Why didn’t you take me with you?” He asks, angry at how vulnerable he sounds.

“Oh honey, I wanted to. Believe me,” she says. “But I couldn’t. I could barely walk after the last time. My friend from work offered to get me out and I took it.”

“You left me behind,” he says, using every muscle in his body to prevent himself from yelling.

“You were your father’s pride and joy. He would never hurt a hair on your head. I knew you’d be safe,” she says and he can’t help but laugh.

“As it turns out, that’s not true,” Bender says. He doesn’t even remember when it started, but he was young. He was definitely still in elementary school.

“What do you mean?” She asks.

“Did you think that he spared me? All those years alone with him?” Bender asks, demands. He never thought he’d have this conversation and he didn’t want it, but at least he’s getting some answers.

“He hurt you,” she says and it isn’t a question.

“Of course he did. I can’t believe you thought he wouldn’t.”

“Rotten,” she says, shaking her head. “Rotten to the core. Until the day he died.”

He can’t disagree with her there, so he shrugs. “Yeah, he was.”

“I’m sorry,” she says and he can see her shaking. “I’m so sorry.”

He has wanted someone responsible for his childhood to apologize for it for years. His father, his mother, his teachers who never noticed the bruises, Vernon. Claire apologized more than anyone else and she’s one of the only people who was interested in saving him. But with this shaking woman sitting in front of him begging for forgiveness, he finds that it doesn’t feel as good as he thought it would.

“Stop,” he says.

“I didn’t know,” his mother says. “I swear.”

“Please stop,” he says again. “I don’t need to hear it. We both got out.”

“You got out,” she repeats. “You did. We outlived the bastard.”

“Sure,” he says. He looks down at her trembling hands again. “You still wear your wedding ring.”

His mother looks down at her hands and closes her fist. “It’s not his ring. I’ve remarried.”

Bender feels another wave over anger come over him, but he keeps it in. He refused to let himself think about his mother for so many years but if he had, it would have been reasonable to assume that she remarried. “Oh?” He asks.

“He’s a good man. He treats me well and loves our kids,” she says. Kids, he thinks. He’s almost 28 years old and he’s just finding out that his mother has an entire second family. He digs his nails into the palm of his hand.

“Okay,” he says, not sure what else he could say.

“I completely understand if you don’t want anything to do with me,” she says, “but I would like to be a part of your life. I want you to meet your half-siblings.”

The idea of meeting the kids who got lucky makes him feel like he might throw up, but he manages to keep it in.

“I want to meet your wife and your kids. They look lovely,” she says. She doesn’t wait for him to respond, instead standing and placing a piece of paper on his desk. When he looks down at it, he sees a phone number scribbled on it. “I never stopped loving you,” she says. “Please know that.”

She leaves the door open on her way out.

He doesn’t know how long he sits there before Will interrupts his thoughts. “Everything okay?”

He curses under his breath before slipping the piece of paper into his jumpsuit pocket. “All good. Let’s get back to work.”

“Alright,” Will says and John can tell that he doesn’t believe him. One good thing about his business partner is that he won’t ask any further questions.

He slides under a car and starts tinkering away, but his head is elsewhere.

~~

Claire is just about to call the garage and inquire about John’s whereabouts when she hears the front door open and shut.

The kids have long been put to bed and Claire’s been reading a book she picked up at the library, but she’s been worried about her husband’s absence. She tucks a photograph of Lily between the pages she’s reading and slides out of bed.

She expected him to stop in the kitchen for some leftover dinner, but she hears him walking up the stairs. She stands and waits for him to open the bedroom door.

When he does, she sees the face of an exhausted man who looks like he’s had the longest day of his life.

“John,” she whispers, “what happened?”

Instead of responding, he wraps his arms around her middle, pulls her close, and buries his face in her neck.

She wraps her fingers in the hair on the back of his neck and rubs his back with her free hand. Something bad must have happened at work.

Claire waits until she feels his arms loosen around her before pulling back. He looks tired but also angry, a storm behind his brown eyes. “Love,” she says, brushing his hair out of his face.

“My mother is back in town,” he spits out.

Claire would have been less surprised if he said anything else. “Your mother? But I thought she was...” Claire doesn’t know what she thought she was, if she’s honest. Dead? Non-existent? She doesn’t know.

“She saw an ad for the garage in the newspaper.”

Claire watches him as fury dances across his features. Although he looks more pissed off than she’s ever seen him, his hands rest gently on her hips.

“She had the audacity to stop by my business, tell me that her new husband and children are in town, and say that she wants us all to meet. After she left me with that man, knowing what he was capable of.” He shakes in her arms and grits his teeth. “She had the audacity to make me feel bad for her.”

Claire pulls him close again, his chin falling to her shoulder. Claire doesn’t think she can say anything to make him feel better, doesn’t think that the words even exist, so she just rubs his back until the shaking stops.

She remembers what John was like when his father died during their senior year of high school. He was quiet, so quiet that it became concerning. She remembers him climbing through her bedroom window unannounced, climbing into her bed, and holding her all night.

At the time, back in the early days of their relationship, she was worried that he was going to be permanently affected by it, worried that he would never be okay again. He was then, and she knows will be again now.

“Why don’t you take a nice warm shower and get into bed,” Claire says. “It’s a Friday, let’s sleep in tomorrow.”

“If the kids will let us,” he mumbles under his breath. “She wants to meet the kids,” he says, his eyes flaring.

“We don’t have to have anything to do with her, if that’s what you want,” she says. “You can decide what you want to do later. But we can’t do anything about it now. Shower.”

“Join me?” He asks, a small semblance of a smile on his face.

“If you want me to,” she says, smiling back.

“Oh, I always want you.”

Later, after spending a warm shower up in his arms with her legs wrapped around him, she watches him succumb to sleep.

~~

Brian is pacing back and forth in their living room, waiting for Laurie to pull into the driveway. He just got off of a conference call with his new employees, getting ready for launch day. Laurie, who works more on the coding side of things rather than the administrative, skipped out and went to pick Larry up from the airport.

As promised, Brian visited Larry Lester and vice versa over the years. Visits got less and less frequent, especially after Larry’s parents moved out of the state and Larry’s first child was born. Now though, Larry has a business trip in the city and Brian offered up their apartment as a place to stay.

Anne and Stubby, or David as he’s called now, are coming over for dinner. Overall, he’s nervous about the amount of people that he doesn’t see very often coming over for dinner.

He sees the headlights and then hears the car door shut, so he goes to be useful and help carry Larry’s bags in. He opens the front door and is about to slip his shoes on, but Larry is already standing on the other side of the doorway with his suitcase in hand.

“Larry,” he says, smiling and stepping aside to let him and Laurie in.

“Bri,” he says, giving him a quick handshake before moving into the kitchen.

Laurie and Larry have formed a weird, mutual understanding over the years. They like each other well enough and they get along great when they’re together, but Brian can still sometimes feel the tension left over from high school days.

Something that was very unexpected was the friendship forged between Anne and Laurie. Anne and Stubby stayed close to Shermer even after Anne’s parents moved away. Laurie and Brian attended their wedding and they are set to be the godparents of their first child. Anne and Laurie had plenty of conversations about the past that Brian was not privy to, but the two of them are thick as thieves these days.

Brian takes the suitcase from Larry and sets it down in the spare bedroom. Their apartment is big but isn’t in a great area, so they ended up getting a bargain.

In the time it takes him to walk from the spare room to the kitchen, Anne and Stubby have arrived and are standing in the kitchen next to Laurie and Larry.

“Hello,” he says in greeting, giving Anne a quick hug and Stubby a handshake.

“Hey, Bri,” Stubby says. Another weird development over the last few years is the tolerance/borderline friendship between himself and Stubby.

“Ready to eat?” He asks and when he’s met with enthusiasm, he smiles. “I’ll get to work then.”

~~

Laurie lies on her side, her legs tangled in Brian’s as she watches him sleep. There was a time, back when they first started looking into starting their own business, when Brian barely slept at all. He was razor-thin focused on everything, he refused to take breaks, and he became distant, so distant that she began to worry about the future of their relationship.

She became desperate after weeks of this, weeks where she went to bed without him and where he was barely touching her. She reached out to Claire, intending only to vent, but she ended up coming over with Bender under the rouse of something she can’t remember and staging somewhat of an intervention.

After they left, Brian sat her down and told her about the time he brought a gun to school their senior year of high school.

Laurie knows him better now than she did then and she can tell when he’s working himself too hard. He knows her better too, and can tell when she’s too stuck in her head. She’s never known anyone like him.

She loves him so much, more than she ever thought she could love anyone.

Back in high school, she initially thought he was a weird dork that Claire somehow ended up being friends with. After a while, especially after she reconciled with Claire, she realized that she found him cute.

Olivia could tell right away. It’s one of her superpowers, being able to tell attraction from one shared look. Laurie remembers one party right before graduation where Olivia got her drunk, forced her to admit it, and made fun of her in front of her friends. The one positive about the whole situation was that Olivia, Jerry, and Ben were terrified of John Bender and didn’t dare cross him or anyone he cared about, so Brian got spared any retaliatory bullying.

After they hooked up after Claire and Bender’s wedding, Brian told her that the meal she made him in the home ec classroom senior year meant as much to him as it did to her. She counts her blessings that she was able to find him again, five years later.

Sometimes, when she’s too stuck in her head, she wonders if she deserves forgiveness from anyone she’s hurt. Anne Lester, one of her best friends now, was brutally bullied by Olivia and Laurie just stood by and let it happen. She had her reasons, but none of them were good enough to justify what she let happen.

She stood by while Olivia harassed Allison too, someone Laurie cares for quite a bit now as well. She called Brian a dork to his face once, before Bender threatened her old friends with a switchblade. The guilt washes over her when she thinks about it too much or for too long.

But just like she takes care of him, Brian takes care of her. He can tell when she gets that glazed-over look in her eye and he always knows what to do and say.

She watches him as he shifts slightly in his sleep. One thing she discovered early in their relationship is that Brian talks in his sleep. He mutters incoherent sentences under his breath and the first time that it happened, Laurie laughed so hard it woke him up.

I’m going to marry this man, she thinks as she presses the side of her face into her pillow. Even though her father doesn’t like him, she’s going to marry Brian.

He’s the best thing that’s ever happened to her and she’s made it her mission in life to try to make him as happy as he makes her.

She gently, so she doesn’t wake him, places her arm over his middle. In his sleep, he grabs her hand and pulls her close.

~~

Andy’s mom sets a plate in front of him before sitting across from him at the table. It’s been a week since he buried his dad and she buried her husband, and they’re sitting in the kitchen eating pity lasagna.

Allison had a call with her publisher, something about the launch of her new book, so Andy decided to go to his mother’s house. James and M.J. went back at their respective homes and Lucy was in school, and Andy didn’t want his mother to be alone with her grief.

“Mrs. Hammond really cannot cook,” his mom says, poking the food with her fork.

“It’s not that bad,” Andy says, shoveling a forkful into his mouth.

“Andy, you still don’t have a refined palate, even after all that time in Italy,” she teases, a smile on her lips.

He’s so glad to see her smile, so even though she’s making fun of him, he smiles back. “Food is food, even in Italy,” he says, knowing that Allison would smack him if she was sitting next to him. Not like she can judge, based on what he saw her eat when they were still in high school.

“I’m not sure your girlfriend would agree with you,” his mother says, saying what he’s thinking. “Sorry, fiancée.” His mom gave him a hard time about that one, as did everyone else, since they didn’t tell anyone. The only reason he didn’t was because it was so new and he wanted it to be theirs for a while.

“Sorry, Mom,” he says, not for the first time since he’s been home.

“I’m excited to read Allison’s next book,” his mom remarks, and while Andy knows that his mom reads and enjoys Allie’s books, he can’t help but feel like she’s ramping up to something.

“Me too,” he says. He had read her books without knowing they were hers back when they were broken up and read them again when they got back together. They comforted him when he felt lost and stitched him back together when Allison came back.

“Are you staying around until the release?” She asks. Andy smiles a small smile, realizing that this is what his mom wanted to know.

“We are going to stick around a bit longer than that, I think,” Andy says.

“How long is a bit?” His mom asks.

“About a year, I think,” Andy says. When his mom gasps dramatically, Andy rolls his eyes. “It makes sense to stick around for a bit. We’re going to get married eventually and we want everyone there.”

“You’ve just made me so happy,” his mom says. Andy didn’t realize that his mom had missed him that much, but the tears pooling in her eyes proves it.

“I’m glad,” he says, taking another bite of the apparently sub-par lasagna.

“Promise me that you aren’t staying because of me,” she says.

“Mom,” Andy begins to protest but she lifts her to stop him.

“I can take care of myself.”

“I know you can,” Andy says. “I know you can. But I want to help.”

“Your father loved you,” his mother bursts out and it makes Andy flinch. “He did. I know you don’t believe it.”

“Mom,” he says as he lays his fork down on his plate.

“I know he wasn’t always good, but he loved you. He loved me too,” she says, her chin wobbling. To Andy, it sounds like she’s trying to convince herself that what she’s saying is true. Because she’s grieving, he lets her.

“I know, Mom,” he says, reaching over to take her hand.

“I miss him,” she says, and then she starts crying. “And I know I shouldn’t.”

Andy stands and is immediately at his mother’s side. He lets her wrap her arms around his middle and she presses her face into his stomach. After everything that his dad put his mom through, after everything that’s happened, this is the first time Andy has ever seen his mother cry.

They stay like this for a while, Andy’s mom clinging to Andy while she cries quietly. He doesn’t know how much time has passed, but eventually the front door opens and Lucy steps through, back from school.

His mother looks up and when she sees her daughter standing there, she pushes Andy away and wipes her eyes. Andy watches as seconds pass and she puts herself back together like an expert. He wonders how many times she’s had to do that to be so good at it.

“Is everything alright?” Lucy asks, dropping her backpack on the floor.

“Perfectly fine, my dear,” his mother says before pushing her chair back and standing up. “There’s lasagna in the kitchen. Have some if you’d like.” She then moves swiftly up the staircase and disappeared.

“What the fuck was that all about?” Lucy asks, looking at where his mother just disappeared.

“Don’t swear,” Andy says as an impulse. He picks up the plates and brings them to the sink. “She’s got a lot going on.”

“Don’t we all,” his sister says, following him into the kitchen. She takes a fork out of the drawer and takes a bite of the lasagna. “Oh, that’s disgusting.”

“Seriously?” Andy asks after he places the plates in the sink. “Is it really that bad?”

“Didn’t you have some?” She asks, throwing her fork in the sink as well.

“Shut up,” Andy says, leaning against the counter.

“Is Mom okay?” Lucy asks.

Andy shrugs. “No,” he says. “But she will be.”

“She keeps pretending to hold it together,” Lucy says.

“She’s trying to be a good mom,” Andy says. He knows because he’s seen it. He saw it his entire childhood, his mom keeping it together so her kids wouldn’t know that anything was wrong.

“I just wish she would… I don’t know,” Lucy says and Andy knows how she feels.

“Give her time,” Andy says. He leans over and lays his hand on her shoulder. Lucy was a daddy’s girl when she was little, Andy remembers. As much as his dad could love anyone, he loved her. Andy left for Europe when Lucy was thirteen, back when she was starting to stray from that role into an angsty teenager.

“Since when did you become an adult?” Lucy asks, brushing her hand off his shoulder with a smirk.

“I’m 28,” Andy says. “I’m practically 30. I’m getting married.”

“God, that’s gross,” Lucy says. “Are you going to make me an aunt again soon? James’ kids don’t like me.”

“To be fair, James’ kids don’t like anyone,” Andy says. Much like James himself, James’ kids keep to themselves. “And probably not anytime soon. It’s up to Allison.”

If he’s honest, Andy doesn’t know if Allison will ever want kids. Andy himself isn’t committed to the idea, he’s happy enough as he is, and he’d be happy to go along with anything Allison wants to do in that department. He hopes they’d be good parents.

“You’d be good parents,” Lucy says, as if she’s reading his thoughts. “But don’t have them if you’re not sure you want them.”

Andy wouldn’t dream of it, not after seeing what it’s done to Allison, to Bender, and to a lesser extent, to Claire. Allison would never compromise on something like that either, even if it was a make or break thing for him.

“When did you get so old?” Andy asks Lucy, earning him a punch in the arm.

“Shut up,” Lucy says. “I’ve got homework. Are you sticking around for a while?”

“Sure,” Andy says. “I gotta clean up in here and I’ll check on Mom, too.”

Lucy nods. “We missed you, you know,” she says before retreating up to her room.

Andy didn’t think that he’d be happy to come back to Shermer, but for now, he is. He grabs the sponge and starts scrubbing the dirty dishes.

~~

“She’s outside,” Claire says, Owen balanced on her hip as she runs her hand through his hair. “Pouting by the shed, I’m sure.”

“What about?” Bender asks, then presses a soft kiss to his wife’s lips.

Owen reaches his arms out and says “Dada!” He repeats is over and over until Bender drops a kiss on his head too.

“She’s upset that Owen wanted to play with his Star Wars action figure, I believe. I told her she needed to share, but...”

“But,” Bender agrees. Lily is at the ripe age of five and has been particularly crabby lately. “I’ll go check on her and then I’ll get started on dinner.”

He finds Lily right where Claire expected her to be, slumped over in front of the shed with her forehead pressed to her knees. “Hello, Peanut,” Bender says, and after weighing the risk and benefits of getting his jumpsuit even more dirty, he sits down next to her in the garden bed. “What’s going on?”

“I’m not talking to you,” she says, muffled because of her position.

“Me? What did I do?” He asks, pinching her leg lightly. She peeks out from under her arm before burying her face again.

“I’m not talking to anyone,” Lily says. “Momma is mean.”

“What did Momma do?” Bender asks. Having children has taught him patience, something he didn’t have an ounce of ten years ago.

“She took Luke away.”

The Luke Skywalker action figure was a gift to Owen from Uncle Brian, even though he’s a little too young for it. Owen loves the thing, but unfortunately so does Lily.

“I’m sorry you’re upset, Peanut,” he says, “but Owen also gets to play with Luke.”

“You don’t understand!” Lily says, finally looking up at him. She’s been crying and she has dirt all over her face, two things that will have Claire distressed later.

“Tell me what I don’t understand,” he says, rubbing a hand through her hair. She’s a mess and is going to need a bath anyway, so Bender doesn’t worry about his dirty hands messing up her hair.

“Barbie is going to miss him,” she says, her lip trembling. “She gets upset when he’s away for too long.”

Bender finds that his kids constantly surprise him. He doesn’t remember much from his childhood, Claire thinks that he must’ve blocked most of it out, but he can’t imagine himself ever being this innocent.

“They’re married and all Owen does is drool on him,” Lily whines. “It’s not fair.”

He wasn’t expecting this to be the source of conflict, although maybe he should have. Lily has a very active imagination and it’s been known to get her in trouble.

“That isn’t fair,” Bender says, “but Luke was Owen’s first, so it’s also not fair to take it away from him. What are we going to do about it?”

Lily furrows her brow as if she’s deep in thought. “You and momma could get Owen a new one.”

Bender laughs at that. “Maybe Santa will bring Owen a new one. But until then, you have to share. Okay, Peanut?”

Lily frowns for a second before nodding her head, as if this new plan is agreeable enough to her.

“Okay, good,” Bender says before standing and brushing his pants off. He offers his daughter his hand and when she takes it, she pulls herself up with it. “Let’s get you washed up. Your uncles will be here soon.”

Patrick and Jimmy are visiting from Boston after Claire’s been begging them to come for almost three years. The last time they were here, they had just moved into their home, Lily was two, and Claire was pregnant with Owen.

Lily doesn’t remember the visit but she likes to talk on the phone and Patrick and Jimmy are willing to listen. Claire insisted that they be a part of their kids’ lives and Bender had no objection, but Claire’s parents thought otherwise.

Claire’s father, who still hates John all these years later, has expressed how much he wishes Claire would cut her brother out, but Claire ignores him. Claire’s mother never says anything when it comes up, she just sits silently while Claire and her husband argue.

Peter Standish told John only a month ago that he had ruined Claire’s life by knocking her up and forcing her into marriage. John, having had ten years of practice, just laughed dryly and told him that he really didn’t know Claire at all if he thought that John, or anyone else for that matter, could force Claire to do anything.

It turns out that he thinks a similar thing about Jimmy, thinking that the man corrupting his good, all-American son into dropping out of medical school and becoming gay. Claire doesn’t put up with it anymore. She doesn’t exactly keep her parents from the children, but she’s made it clear to them that she would pick her brother over them every time.

Lily holds her arms up and John sighs but leans down to pick her up anyway. She wraps her arms around his neck and curls into his neck while he carries her inside. When he opens the back door, he puts her down.

“Time for a shower, okay?” Bender says. “No giving Mom a hard time.”

Lily scrunches her nose but nods before taking off upstairs. Bender walks into the kitchen where he finds Claire reading something for work and Owen sitting on the floor with a toy truck.

“What was her problem?” Claire asks without looking up.

“Luke and Barbie are married,” Bender says, coming up behind her and slipping an arm around her waist. “They can’t possibly be without each other.”

Claire turns her head to look at him. “Seriously?” She asks.

“Seriously,” Bender says before pressing a kiss to her cheek. “She’s getting in the shower.”

“Good,” Claire says as Bender lets go of her. “I’ll check on her in a few. You should shower too.”

“Are you saying I smell, Princess?” Bender asks which earns him an eye roll from his wife.

“You are covered in grease and dirt. Don’t argue,” she says.

Bender knows better than to try, so he climbs the stairs to his bedroom.

~~
Patrick and Jimmy arrive shortly after John gets out of the shower. He’s watching Owen eat and Claire is braiding Lily’s hair when the doorbell rings. Lily jumps up as Claire ties the last loop around her hair.

“I’ll get it,” Lily says.

“Of course,” Claire says, shooting Bender a look of exasperation. No matter how many times she tells Lily not to answer the door unless she know who it is, it doesn’t stick. “But only because you know it’s your uncles.”

Bender shakes his head as she heads into the entry way, knowing as well as she does that it’ll never work.

Lily reaches up and pulls the door open. Claire feels her face break into a smile. “Hello,” her daughter says, looking up at Patrick and Jimmy.

“Hello, Lily,” Patrick says. He smiles down at the girl before looking up at his sister.

“It’s good to see you again,” Jimmy says.

Lily turns around says, “Please come in.” Patrick raises his eyebrows as Claire shakes her head.

“She’s got good manners,” Patrick says. He leans in and presses a kiss to Claire’s cheek. “It’s so nice to see you, Claire.”

“You too. I missed you guys,” Claire says, looking at Jimmy with a smile. “But yes, please come in.”

Claire leads them into the house. Bender is wiping Owen’s face with a napkin, but turns when he hears them.

“Hey,” Bender says, picking Owen up. “How was your flight?”

“Not bad,” Jimmy says. “Who’s this?”

“This is Owen,” Bender says and Owen buries his face in Bender’s neck. “He’s a little shy.”

“I can get you set up in the spare bedroom,” Claire says. “John’s going to cook dinner.”

“Oh really?” Patrick says, teasing. John rolls his eyes.

“I’m not bad,” he says.

“He’s actually very good at it,” Claire says. “Come on.”

She leads Patrick and Jimmy to the bedroom, where she’s already made up the guest bed. “You’ve done a lot with this place,” Patrick says looking around.

“Yes, well,” Claire says, motioning for them to set their bags in the corner of the room. “You know me.”

“How is everything here?” Jimmy asks.

“Good,” she says. “Brian’s getting married to my friend from high school. Allison and Andy are back from their trip and they’re also engaged.”

“Wow,” Jimmy says. “Very exciting.”

“How are Mom and Dad?” Patrick asks and Claire’s heart breaks for him.

“I think they’re okay. Mom is at least,” she says. “Dad doesn’t come by very often. He still hates John.”

“Really?” Patrick asks.

“They get into an argument every time Dad comes over,” she says. “I had to ask him to leave last time because John doesn’t like to argue in front of the kids but he looked like he was going to explode.”

“And Mom?”

Claire shrugs. “She loves the kids.”

Claire hears a shriek and a crash from downstairs. She rubs her hand over her forehead and says, “I’ve got to go rescue my husband from our children.”

“We’ll come,” Jimmy says, both of them following her out of the room and down the stairs.

~~
Anne remembers the days when she was first getting to know Laurie for Brian’s sake. Brian isn’t stupid, has never been stupid, so even though she was initially skeptical of his choice in partner, she made an effort.

She hadn’t expected Laurie to make an effort right back.

After Brian showed up at school with a whole new group of friends that included Andrew Clark, Anne watched her brother spiral. Brian hurt him and Anne knows that the fact that he didn’t choose Larry over his new friends stung for a while.

Eventually everything worked out and Larry remains a close friend of Brian’s even after he moved.

Anne didn’t feel the same kind of betrayal when she found out that Brian was dating Laurie Murphy. She had already spent some time with Claire Standish both when she was still in high school and after, so she wasn’t particularly hurt when Brian ended up dating one of her past tormentors.

If it had been Olivia though, Anne would never have forgiven him.

Anne remembers getting the phone call from Laurie. It was weird and awkward to hear the apology, and even weirder when Laurie invited her out to dinner, but she agreed.

Anne learned very quickly that Laurie has this undying loyalty to her and that if she is on your side, she’ll stay glued to you for as long as you’ll have her. Anne thinks that for a while, she was stuck to Olivia and was happy to stay there as long as Olivia didn’t turn on her.

Laurie also has a compulsive need for everyone to like her. Anne was struck by it when she realized, as Laurie sat across from her that first dinner, that she was looking for Anne’s approval. After a few tentative months, Anne gave it.

Now, Anne considers Laurie one of her best friends in the entire world. It happened slowly over the years until Anne realized that Brian and Laurie took up a significant chunk of her heart.

Of course, a large part of her heart also belongs to David.

She knew who he was at school, even though he was a year ahead of her. He was the cool, quiet sports guy who went by Stubby and who was friends with Andrew Clark and Anne didn’t know much else about him.

She knew who he was in college, too. Still a year ahead of her, he didn’t know of her existence for the first year she was there. She saw him at a party once, back when she was a freshman and was trying something new, before he disappeared with a girl to find a bedroom.

It wasn’t until she was a sophomore and he was a junior that he learned her name. She worked in the tutoring center on campus, helping kids understand physics and calculus.

“Hi,” he said when he sat across from her. “I don’t understand this at all and I need to pass this class or I’ll get kicked off the team.”

He tossed his test in front of her and leaned back in his chair. She picked it up and recognized the formulas on the page. Her eyes flicked to the score on the top of the page before she looked up at him.

“Okay,” she said. “I’m Anne.”

He had the decency to look a bit sheepish at that. “Sorry,” he said. “I’m-”

“Stubby,” she said. “I know.”

He raised his eyebrows at the name before squinting at her face. “Most people call me David now,” he said. “Did we go to high school together?”

“Yes,” she said. “I’m a year behind you, though.”

“What’s your last name, Anne?” He said, eyes twinkling with interest.

“Lester,” she said. Before he could think too hard about the name, she slid the test back over to him. “Let’s get started.”

She tutored him for the semester and was sad to see him go, but he passed physics and moved on. He didn’t leave their last meeting without giving her a dazzling parting smile, though.

She thought she had seen the last of him until two years later, when she was a senior manning a table at an alumni event.

“Hey,” he said and she recognized his voice. She shot her head up and locked eyes with him. She had always thought that his hair was brown, but in the light of the gymnasium, it had a red tint to it.

“Hi,” she said back. He was smiling at her and she felt herself burn under his gaze.

“Raffle tickets?” He asked, looking down at the table. “What can I win?”

“Um,” she said, trying to remember the spiel she’d been giving to people all afternoon. “The grand prize is a court side seat with your name on it.”

“Wow,” he said. “Tickets are a dollar? Sounds like a bargain.”

“Uh, yeah,” Anne said, fiddling with the tickets. “I guess it is. I’m not really into sports.”

“Cool,” he said, reaching into his pocket and pulling out a dollar bill. He handed it to her while she passed him a ticket. “I remember you, you know.”

Anne furrowed her brow. “I would hope so. It hasn’t been that long since I saved your physics grade.”

“I meant from high school,” he said. “I remember you from high school. You went to prom with Andy’s friend.”

“I did,” she said. “Did you just figure this out?”

“No,” he said. “I figured it out after you told me your last name.”

“Oh,” she said. She couldn’t figure out why they were still talking or what he wanted from her. “Okay.”

“I’m sorry about your brother,” he said and Anne narrowed her eyes.

“My brother is fine,” she said. “That wasn’t even you, anyway.”

“I know,” he said. “Fuck, sorry. I don’t know how to talk to you.”

“What do you want to say?” she asked and she hoped.

“I want to ask you to dinner,” he said, “but I don’t know what you’ll say back.”

She felt herself blushing and she knew he was watching. At the time, she’d never dated anyone before. She’d never even been on a date, unless she counted prom, which she didn’t.

“Um,” she said. “Yes.”

“Yes?” He asked, a smile taking over his features.

“Yes,” she said. “But you’ll have to wait until I’m done here.”

“Of course,” he said. “I’ll wait.”

And he did. She didn’t know where he went for the remaining two hours of the event, but he met her by the exit when people were filing out.

“Sorry you didn’t win,” she said. The seat went to someone else, an older alumni who had bought ten tickets from her earlier in the day.

“I wasn’t that invested,” he said. “Any preference on where we go to eat?”

She shook her head as he opened his car door for her. She slipped inside and wondered how she ended up there.

He took her to a diner and listened to her talk. They talked until the diner closed and they were forced out. He insisted on walking her back to her dorm from the parking lot and she let him kiss her before she went inside.

“Good night,” he whispered.

“Good night, David,” she whispered back.

After that, they dated. It was nice and it was easy, for a while. She brought him to Brian’s apartment for dinner, he met her brother, and her parents liked him. Not a single issue crossed her mind until she was at his place one night, looking through his yearbook.

One thing she never understood about Shermer High was the administration’s blind acceptance of the party culture. Sure, kids got detention if they did anything on school grounds, but they let kids submit pictures to the yearbook from parties without question.

She was thumbing through it, surprised by how many pictures David made appearances in, when she saw it. It was a small picture, sitting innocently on the corner of the page. David looked more than buzzed, his eyes unfocused and grin a little too wide. Anne recognized Andy in the background and saw Claire’s signature red hair, but that wasn’t what made her heart fall to her stomach.

It was the girl under David’s arm and the lipstick smudged on his face. Olivia.

She didn’t know how long she stared at it, but she only broke her focus on it when David came into the bedroom from the bathroom. His hair was still wet from the shower and he was wearing gray sweatpants.

He took one look at her and paused. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” she said. “Really, it’s nothing.”

“Don’t lie,” he said, sitting next to her on the bed and pulling the yearbook towards him. “Oh,” he said when he spotted it. “I-”

“I don’t need an explanation,” she said. “It was years ago and you didn’t know me yet. It’s just…”

David waited patiently and Anne was overcome with how well he knew her. It felt weird to know him then while she looked down at a picture of a version of him that she didn’t know at all.

“She tortured me,” Anne said. “Every day for years. Laurie and Claire did too, but Olivia was ruthless. She never gave me a break and she never apologized for any of it. She’s a horrible person.”

“I know,” he said. He didn’t though, not really. Not the endless nights where she couldn’t sleep because she was crying so hard, not the notebooks she had to replace because Olivia had stolen and vandalized them, not the things that Olivia said that still made her pause when she looked in the mirror. But he tried to understand, and she loved him for it.

“It’s just hard,” she said. David told her once that he thought he was in love with Olivia back in high school, but that he realized he was wrong when he started dating her. They were nice words, but they did nothing to make her feel better when she faced the picture. “To see you with her like that.”

“I’m sorry,” he said, reaching out to stroke her knee.

“There’s nothing to be sorry for,” she said, looking at him and wiping her thumb across his brow. “It just feels gross.”

He pressed a kiss to her wrist before reaching over and throwing the yearbook off the bed. “I love you,” David said, pulling her close until she was lying down facing him.

She married him four years later and now, she’s expecting their first child. Life comes at you fast, Anne thinks as she comes out of her daydream and watches Laurie take a sip of her water.

“That’s the plan anyway,” Laurie says, responding to something David said that Anne hadn’t heard.

“What does Bri think about that?” He asks as he places his hand on Anne’s thigh.

“He’ll just have to deal with it, Stubby,” Laurie says, a smirk on her lips. Laurie is the only one who still calls David Stubby besides Andy. When David graduated high school, he left his old name behind with the rest of it.

“Laur,” Anne says, “are you going to the reunion?”

Anne doesn’t know why she says it, but she’s been thinking about it. She knows that David wants to go but she also knows that he’ll never ask her. It’s not her graduating class so none of her friends will be there, but her past tormentor will be.

Anne can tell that Laurie knows exactly what she’s thinking. “I think so,” she says. “Brian wants to go. I think the rest of his friends are going.”

Anne nods and Laurie watches her carefully. “Well, if you’re going-”

“We don’t have to go,” David says. “Or I can go by myself.”

“No,” Anne says. “I’ll go. I have a few weeks to prepare myself.”

“Don’t push yourself,” Laurie says. “I’m not looking forward to seeing her either. But you’ll have an entire team by your side. I’m sure Olivia won’t mess with you if you’re sitting at a table with John Bender.”

“John’s a softy and you know it,” Anne says with a smile. Anne hasn’t spent a lot of time with Brian’s friends from high school, but she’s seen John Bender with his children enough times to know that the bad boy from high school doesn’t exist anymore.

“We know that, but Olivia doesn’t,” Laurie says.

Anne turns to look at David, who smiles at her. There’s a question in his eyes, a look of are you sure? Anne just nods.

~~
Andy is lying in bed reading over a case briefing when the phone rings. Allison is out with Claire and Laurie, Allison explaining briefly before she left that Claire needs a break from the kids and that Patrick and Jimmy are babysitting until Bender gets home from work. She kissed him on her way out and he’s been hanging out by himself since then.

He drops the packet of papers and leans over, grasping the phone with his fingers. He barely manages to grab it before he pulls it out of the cradle and brings it to his ear.

“Hello?” He says into the receiver, looking down at the stack of papers. He has a lot of work to do for his new job and he’s barely made a dent in it.

“Oh,” the person on the other side says. “I thought… Is this Allison Reynolds’ phone number?”

Andy furrows his brow. The only person who calls here that doesn’t also know he lives here is Allison’s literary agent, but Allison’s agent is a man and the voice on the phone is a woman. “It is,” he says, unable to keep the apprehension out of his voice. “She’s not in right now, can I take a message?”

“Um, no,” the woman says. “I think it’s better if I call back another time.”

“Do you mind if I ask what this is about?” Andy says. He doesn’t like the idea of having to tell Allison that some strange woman called the house looking for her. Andy knows that Allison is already sacrificing so much of herself to stay in the Shermer area for a while. Any sign of trouble would put her on edge.

The woman sighs. “Are you her roommate?”

Andy is momentarily taken aback by the question. “Uh, no. Actually, I guess so. I’m her fiancé.”

“Oh,” the woman says and Andy can’t help but think that this is the weirdest conversation he’s had in a long time. “Allie’s getting married?”

“Who is this?” Andy asks. He’s wracking his brain for people that he doesn’t know who also know Allison well enough to call her Allie and comes up blank.

“I’m sorry, this must be so weird,” the woman says. “I’m her cousin. I haven’t spoken to her in years but I saw her name in the phonebook and…”

“And,” Andy says. He didn’t realize that Allison still had family out there outside of her parents. “Do you want me to take down your number for her?”

“That would be great,” she says. “And tell her there’s no pressure. I know things with her family were…”

“Complicated,” Andy supplies. “I will.”

After taking down her number and placing the phone in the cradle, he rubs his hand over his face and wonders what just happened.

~~

It took Andy a long time before he could completely trust her again. He trusts her more than anything now, but even months into their trip, he found the task difficult.

When they were in Paris about six months into their trip, Andy woke up alone.

The sheets next to him were cold and Allison’s bag was gone from where it had been sitting on the dresser the night before. He pushed himself up to sitting, pulled his knees close, and curled his chin to his chest.

His mind raced and his heart along with it as he tried not to cry. He visualized himself showing back up in Shermer, showing up on Bender and Claire’s doorstep heartbroken and alone again. Bender had to snap him out of it last time, only letting Andy cry on Allison’s floor for a couple of hours, and he would have to do it again.

Just when he was wondering what would happen with them, with Claire and Bender and Brian and him without Allison, the door to their suite opened.

He looked up and saw her standing there with a pastry bag and two cups of coffee.

“Hi,” she said, tilting her head slightly to the side. When she took a step closer to him, he flopped back on the bed and threw his arm over his eyes. “What happened?”

“Nothing,” Andy managed to croak out. He felt pathetic.

He heard her drop their breakfast on the bedside table before crawling into bed next to him. He felt her hesitantly reach out and run her fingers through his hair.

“What’s wrong?” She said, her voice soft.

“Nothing,” he repeated, letting out a stuttering sigh. “I was just worried.”

Allison’s hand stilled in his hair as he dropped his arm from his eyes. “I was at the bakery downstairs. I picked up a croissant.”

“I know,” he said.

“I would never do that to you,” she said. “Leave you here like that.”

“You did before,” he snapped before he could stop himself. She withdrew her hand like he burned her. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to say that.”

“No, don’t apologize to me,” Allison said, her voice thick. “You’re right.”

“Allie,” he said, finally looking at her. He could see the tears in her eyes.

“I was afraid last time,” she said quietly. “I was afraid that you’d wake up one day and realize that I was too much for you, that you didn’t want me anymore.” He opened his mouth to say something, but she shook her head and continued. “I know now that my mind was playing tricks on me and that I was selfish to do what I did.”

Andy pushed himself up until he was sitting, watching her as she watches the hands in her lap. “I’m going to spend the rest of my life trying to make it up to you,” she said. She looked up at him then, leaning forward to rest her forehead against his. “You are the best thing life has given me.”

Andy leaned forward and kissed her, bringing his hand up and winding it in her hair. When he pulled back, he brushed his nose against hers. “I love you,” he said. “More than anything.”

He’s thinking about that day when he hears the key turn in the lock. He hasn’t been able to concentrate on work since the phone call, he’s been too preoccupied wondering how Allison will react.

He hopes she’ll be all right. When the door creaks open, he stands.

~~

“I’m home,” Allie says as she tosses her keys in the bowl on the counter. She feels well-rested, like she’s just slept for hours, but really she’d just been at the mall. She never liked the mall, much to Claire’s chagrin, but she liked spending time with Claire and Laurie.

“We’re all going to be married women soon enough,” Laurie had said, laughing into her soda.

“You guys are way behind,” Claire said. “We’re coming up on our five year anniversary.”

“Yes, Claire,” Allison said. “We know you’re an overachiever. Marrying your high school sweetheart, becoming the perfect American family, doing it all.”

Claire’s nose wrinkled. “I don’t know if you could call John and I ‘sweethearts’,” she said, “but you shouldn’t throw stones in glass houses, future Mrs. Clark.”

Allison kicked Claire’s shin under the table but did it lightly. “Can you believe that we’re all going to be married to men we knew in high school?” Laurie asked.

“Ew,” Allison said, which prompted the rest of them to laugh.

She lets out a soft laugh at the recent memory before walking into their bedroom. “I bought you a shirt,” she says, tossing a bag on the bed next to Andy and the pile of papers he has stacked in front of him.

“Thanks?” Andy says, reaching in and pulling out the blue fabric. “This is unexpected, but nice.”

“Of course it is,” Allison says, flopping down on the bed beside him. “I picked it out.”

He leans on his elbow and presses a kiss to her lips. Allison looks up at him when he pulls back and notices unwelcome tension sitting between his eyebrows.

“What’s this?” She asks, poking her finger at the place where his skin wrinkles.

“Someone called looking for you today,” he says. “She left her number.”

“Who?” Allison asks, her stomach twisting at Andy’s obvious anxiety.

“She said she was your cousin,” Andy says.

“My cousin,” Allison repeats. “My cousin?”

“Yeah,” Andy says. “I just realized that she never gave me her name. I took down her number for you.”

Allison pauses before knitting her eyebrows together. “What the fuck?”

“I know,” he says. “It was the weirdest conversation.”

“Christ,” Allison says.

“She said there was no pressure to call her back,” Andy says. “But I’m not really sure why she called in the first place.”

“I wonder which cousin it was,” Allison says. “I wonder if she’s seen my parents.”

“I don’t know. You could call her back and find out.”

Allison groans. “What the fuck. You know, Claire just told me that Bender’s mom showed up at the garage a few weeks ago.”

“His mom? I didn’t know…”

“That he had one? Me neither,” Allison says. “Claire says he’s been off. I don’t think he knows what to do about it.”

“What are you going to do about this?” Andy asks.

Allison sighs and says “I don’t know.”

~~
Brian worries his bottom lip between his teeth while he sits in Bender and Claire’s living room. Lily is babbling about something and Owen is playing with the toy Brian bought him. Laurie is here, chatting in the kitchen, but she feels too far away. The kids make him nervous.

He doesn’t know if it’s because they’re the offsprings of two of his best friends or if kids make him uneasy in general, but he doesn’t like to be left alone with them for long periods of time. They’re just so fragile.

Laurie was the one who offered to babysit so Patrick and Jimmy could enjoy their vacation. She knows that it makes him nervous, but he does love the kids.

“I’m back, stop worrying,” Laurie says, a mug in her hand. She sits down next to him on the couch and leans against his side.

As he sits here, watching Claire and Bender’s kids play, he can’t imagine himself ever having some of his own. Laurie wants them and he does too, in theory, but he just can’t imagine it.

Back when he was dating Greg, Brian reworked his brain so he could visualize what his life would look like if he spent it with a man. When he thought about it back then, he imagined his life being similar to Patrick and Jimmy’s.

But then Brian had gotten too caught up in school, too stuck in his head, and Greg didn’t know how to deal with it. He got frustrated and dumped Brian with little remorse. Brian doesn’t exactly blame him for it, especially after he did the same thing, pulled back and shut down, to Laurie with different results.

He remembers being scared to tell Laurie about this part of his life, but to his surprise, she only said “I didn’t know that was something a person could feel”. She then asked him how he knew.

The real answer, the holy shit I’ve just learned something new about myself moment was when he met Greg, but when Brian thought back on it, he realized a lot of things about the thoughts he had during detention about Claire and Bender. Things that were not exactly platonic and things that he’ll never ever admit to out loud. Bender doesn’t need the ego boost and he’d never let Brian hear the end of it.

When Greg dumped him and Laurie stumbled back into his life, he reworked his brain again. Brian was a planner, he had to know what to expect. Both of the lives he had imagined were different, but good. He can’t complain about that.

“What are you thinking about?” Laurie asks, steam rising up from her mug.

“Nothing,” he says. “Just zoned out.”

“Well, now that I have you back, I have to ask you something,” Laurie says.

“Oh?” He asks, sparing a look to the kids before turning to look at her fully.

“Your sister wants to be my Maid of Honor,” Laurie says.

“Molly? Really?” Brian asks. “Did she ask you that?”

“She did,” Laurie says. “Not in so many words but that’s what she wants.”

“What about Anne?” Brian asks. “I thought you were going to ask her.”

“I did,” Laurie says. “She said no.”

“She said no?” Brian asks, brow furrowing. Anne is Laurie’s best friend, as weird as that is to admit. He never imagined that she’d say no.

“She’s going to be so close to her due date by the time our wedding comes around,” Laurie says, leaning her head against his. “She doesn’t want to be standing for that long and I don’t blame her.”

“Oh,” Brian says. “My sister, then?”

“If it’s okay with you,” Laurie says. “She’ll be so happy.”

“Well, I can’t say no to that,” Brian says.

One quality about Laurie that Brian admires is her ability to make friends with everyone. He imagines that she could have had a diverse group of friends in high school if she hadn’t hitched her wagon to Olivia. The fact that Laurie and his sister are as close as they are isn’t necessarily surprising, but it makes Brian happy, even if he doesn’t admit it.

“We’re getting married,” Laurie whispers, looking at Lily and Owen as they play. Claire told him that it’s rare for the two of them to play without fighting, so Brian looks on as well.

“Yeah,” Brian says, thinking of homemade pasta and home ec classrooms. “We are.”

~~
Jimmy looks at Patrick who is pointedly not looking back at him. Jimmy has always liked looking at Patrick. Ever since he first saw him sitting in that English classroom their freshman year of college, his eyes have been drawn to him.

Patrick always gets antsy when they come back to Shermer. Jimmy doesn’t know if it’s because of his parents or because of how much he had to lie about himself here, but Patrick sleeps horribly every time they come back and can never sit still.

“Love,” Jimmy says, reaching across the mattress so his knuckles bump against Patrick’s knee. “What’s going on in that beautiful head of yours?”

Patrick shakes his head, looking down, but Jimmy catches a hint of a smile. “What if-”

Jimmy waits. He’s always waited for Patrick, since the moment he first met him. The first time he kissed Patrick, the boy practically freaked out. He shifted back like Jimmy had hurt him and stared at him through wide and stormy eyes.

Jimmy waited then for what he thought was going to be a punch, but he ended up being pulled into a bruising kiss. Later, after Jimmy had kissed Patrick until he stopped shaking, Patrick told him that he wasn’t expecting it at all. Jimmy had sought Patrick out under the pretense that he needed help with English, but the reality was that he wanted to get as close as he could to the boy with auburn hair.

“What if she doesn’t approve?” Patrick asks quietly.

“Claire?” Jimmy asks.

Claire Bender née Standish was a quiet blessing in their lives. Patrick hadn’t seen his family in so long, had been rejected so openly by them, until Claire showed up at their house with a beaten and bloody John Bender her senior year of high school. After she left that night, Patrick cried. The first time she used the number he gave her after that night, he cried again.

Jimmy never had much of a family, so he never fully understood Patrick’s struggle with his. Jimmy was raised by his grandmother, one of the kindest people to ever walk the Earth. She died a long time ago, right after Jimmy and Patrick started dating. He never had any parents to cast him out like Patrick did. All Jimmy could do to comfort him was hold him close.

Claire, and by extension, John, wormed their way into Patrick’s, and by extension, Jimmy’s, lives in ways that Jimmy never expected them to. Claire loves her big brother and she likes having them visit. She wants them to know her husband, her friends, her children.

“You can’t actually think that she won’t approve,” Jimmy says. “I know you don’t.”

After a moment, Patrick sighs. “No, I don’t.” He pauses for a beat before taking Jimmy’s hand in his. “Stop it.”

“Stop what?” Jimmy asks, rubbing his thumb over Patrick’s knuckles.

“Knowing me so well,” Patrick says.

Jimmy laughs before leaning over and pressing a quick kiss to his lips. “Never.”

“Food’s here!” Jimmy hears Lily squeal from downstairs. He hears Owen shout something and Bender say something that’s muffled by the door between them.

“Ready?” Jimmy asks.

“Yeah,” Patrick says, giving Jimmy’s hand a quick squeeze. “Okay.”

They emerge downstairs and see Bender and Claire getting their kids dinner. They ordered from a Chinese food place in town, one of Patrick’s old favorites from high school.

“We’re allowed to eat in front of the TV tonight,” Lily says to Jimmy as he serves himself.

“That sounds lovely,” Jimmy says and the five year old rewards him with a smile. He makes his way to the living room and sits on the couch next to Patrick. Lily and Owen have spread their food out on the floor and Claire and Bender on the other wing of the couch, digging into the food.

“So,” Patrick says. “We have… Um…”

Claire looks up at her brother, putting her fork down. When Patrick goes silent, John squints at him before looking over at Jimmy.

“Um,” Jimmy says, watching Patrick fiddle with his fork. “We wanted to offer to babysit the kids for a night,” he says. Not exactly what Patrick was struggling to speak about a moment ago, but something they want to talk about nonetheless. “You could go into the city, stay the night, get away for a bit.”

Claire smiles softly at him. “We can’t ask you to do that. You’re on vacation.”

“We want to,” Jimmy says, nudging Patrick.

“Yes,” Patrick says. “Let us.”

“I’m not going to say no,” Bender says, looking over at where his children are eating food with their fingers and watching the television. “I feel like I haven’t slept in years.”

“Are you sure?” Claire asks again.

“Yes, Claire,” Jimmy says.

“Then, we accept,” she says. She looks over at her brother again. “Is that all?”

“No,” Jimmy says and he nudges Patrick again. Patrick needs to be the one to tell her, she’s his blood.

“We’re having a child,” Patrick says, quickly and unexpectedly. Jimmy thought it was going to take more coaxing to get it out of him and he’s glad it didn’t.

“What?” Claire asks, eyes widening. “Really?”

“Is that…” John trails off, but Jimmy knows that he’s thinking, Is that legal?

“Our close friend’s sister offered to be our surrogate,” Jimmy explains. “She’s only a couple months along, but…”

“Holy shit,” Claire says, quietly enough so her kids don’t hear it. “Oh my God.”

“Congratulations,” Bender says. Jimmy has been continually surprised by Claire’s partner since he first met him. He used to try to give off a tough image, so much so that Jimmy was scared of what he thought of them the first time they met. Teenage boys say stupid things and Jimmy was worried, but John Bender has a heart bigger than anyone would expect.

“Pat,” Claire says, reaching over and touching his knee. “I’m so happy for you.”

“Yeah?” He asks. He sounds relieved, the tension leaving him with his breath.

“Oh my God, yes,” she says. “My kids are going to have a cousin.” She says the word like it’s a mystifying thing. Then again, Jimmy supposes that it is. Claire didn’t have Patrick in her life for years and she probably never pictured him extending their family.

“Yeah,” Patrick says, a similar tone shaping the word. “I guess they are.”

Jimmy leans closer to Patrick, feeling his body heat radiate through his clothes. Patrick turns his head and sends him a look that says I love you and You were right all wrapped in one.

Jimmy sends a look right back.

~~
Claire pulls back the curtains to look out over the city. Claire can’t even remember the last time they left the Shermer area, but she knows it’s been a long time.

John is lying on top of the covers on the bed, his arm thrown over his eyes. They ate dinner at a nice restaurant downtown and walked back to the hotel in the spring chill. As they walked back, Claire thought about how John Bender has been in her life for ten years.

March 24th came and went without fanfare. Claire didn’t even realize what day it was until Brian called her after dinner to say “happy anniversary”. Claire loves them, loves her friends more than anything, but she realized in that moment that they’re grown up now. It seemed silly when the thought crossed her mind, especially since she has two children, but she hadn’t realized how separate her life is from her friends until that moment.

After she got off the phone with Brian, she immediately called over to Allison and Andy’s apartment to say a similar thing. They promised to all get together and have dinner soon, but they haven’t had the chance to yet.

The reunion is coming up fast and they’ll all be together again soon enough.

“Come here,” Bender mumbles, reaching out the hand that isn’t covering his face and feeling for hers.

She smiles at him and takes it before lying along the side of him and leaning her head against his shoulder. It’s been a long time since they had time to themselves, not having to worry about the kids. Well, she’s still worrying about the kids because Owen is a picky eater and Lily gets anxious at night, but she trusts that her brother will be able to handle it.

“John,” Claire says.

He hums before removing his arm from his face and threading his fingers through her hair. He really does look tired. Claire reminds herself to talk to him about cutting back his hours so he can get more sleep. She thinks he’ll resist and it may be an unpleasant conversation, so she saves it for a later time.

“This is nice,” Claire says, leaning into the touch.

“It is,” John says, pressing a kiss to her forehead. He goes quiet, rubbing his hand back and forth over her scalp. She can practically hear him thinking, so she stays still and lets him. “I think I’m going to reach out to my mother.”

“Yeah?” Claire asks, looking up at his face. He keeps his eyes on the ceiling while he plays with her hair.

“Just me, though,” he says. “Not the kids. Not yet.”

“Okay,” Claire says. Ever since his mother showed up, Bender has been on edge and even more exhausted than usual. She hopes that meeting her will give him some sense of closure.

“You can come with me,” he says, “if you want to.”

“Of course I’ll come,” Claire says. John doesn’t like to talk about stuff like this, he doesn’t like to be vulnerable for too long. She bails him out, sitting up out of his arms and leaning over to the bedside table. “We should order room service.”

“Room service? We just got back from dinner,” John says but he’s grinning, so Claire grabs the menu and opens it.

“We didn’t get dessert,” she says. “Look, they have chocolate cake!”

“Okay, okay,” he relents, just like she knew he would. “We’ll split it.”

Later, after the bellhop comes up with the food, Claire and Bender eat the cake while sitting on top of the covers and watching a movie.

“This is good,” Claire says. “Better than I expected it to be, actually.”

“It is,” Bender says and then he reaches his fork over and steals a piece of hers.

She gasps and tries to get a piece of his but he pulls the plate out of reach before she can. “That is not fair.”

“Bite me,” he says, earning him a shove. He still knows how to be an asshole and he can still do it well.

“Fuck you,” she says, the words feeling weird on her tongue. They never swear in front of the kids, making the swift transition after Lily was born. John reaches over and pinches the skin above her knee.

“Bed?” He asks.

“Mm,” she hums, leaning back against the pillows. She hears Bender clear the plates before he’s lying down next to her.

“You look like you want to say something,” Bender says, facing her on the bed.

“Maybe,” she says and when he raises an eyebrow, she sighs. “I think I might be pregnant again.”

John’s face remains neutral, just like it had when she took the test and found out she was pregnant with Owen. She wonders if he’s trying to make up for how he reacted when she found out about Lily. “Think?”

“I haven’t taken a test yet,” Claire clarifies, “but I feel like I am.”

Bender looks at her. His unrelenting gaze used to make her anxious, she used to wonder what he was seeing. Now though, she just lifts her hand up and traces his eyebrow.

“How?” He asks and before Claire can tease him about it, he rolls his eyes. “I mean, we haven’t exactly had time.”

“The shower, I think,” she says. “After your mother stopped by your work.”

“Oh, right,” Bender says, smirking at the memory. “I forgot about that.”

Claire snorts as he moves closer and presses his face to her neck. “Should I be offended by that?”

“Mm, no,” he says, pressing a kiss to the skin below his lips. “I remember now.”

“I know it’s way too early, but I feel like it might be a girl,” Claire says. She’s been right twice before about the gender of her children and she has a feeling that she’ll be right this time too.

“That sucks for Brian,” John says. “We’re supposed to name the next one after him.”

Claire leans back into the pillow while John kisses down her neck. He wraps his hand around her waist and she laughs. “Three,” she says wistfully, thinking about the possibility of having another baby.

John groans and pulls away. “We are never going to sleep again.”

“Not until the youngest is ten at the least,” Claire says. But she’s smiling and so is John.

~~
Andy is sitting on the couch of his old house, reading over something for work while Allison’s head resting on his shoulder, when his mother rushes down the stairs with an armful of shirts.

“Andy,” his mother says and Allison lifts her head in surprise. “Would you wear any of these?”

“Uh, what?” Andy says as he watches his mom drop the shirts on the floor in front of him. “Mom?”

But his mom is already marching back upstairs. “Sort through those,” she says before she disappears completely.

Andy looks at the pile while Allison reaches over and pulls a shirt from the top. “Were these your dad’s?” She asks as she touches the fabric.

“I think so,” Andy says, voice barely there. His dad was built much differently than Andy; his mother cannot possibly think that he would fit into any of this.

Soon enough, his mother reappeared, this time her arms full of pants. She drops them on top of the shirts in an unceremonious fashion. “These too.”

“Mom, what’s going on?” Andy asks, but she’s already turned away and is walking up the stairs again.

“Go,” Allison says, nodding her head to where his mother just disappeared. “I’ll… do something with this.”

Andy runs his hand through his hair before nodding and taking off after his mom. He finds her digging through her closet, pulling things off of hangers and throwing them on the floor.

“Mom,” Andy says, rushing up next to her and grabbing her hands in his. “What are you doing?”

“I need this stuff out of this house,” she says. “It’s been sitting here for too long.”

It’s been months since his father’s funeral and his mother has been withdrawn. Andy had to admit that she’s always been withdrawn. She was a good mother but once he hit a certain age, she drew back from them. At least, she did until his senior year, when things started to fall back into place.

“I want it out,” she says, her black hair falling in front of her face. “It’s holding us back.”

“Mom,” Andy says. “Come sit.”

He guides her to the edge of the bed and sits next to her. She looks at the clothes scattered around the floor and shakes her head. “His stuff, it’s weighing me down.”

“I know, Mom,” Andy says.

“He loved us,” his mother says, “and I miss him, but we need to move on.”

Andy knows that we means I, so he holds her hand. “Okay,” he says. “But I’m not going to fit into any of his clothes. And to be completely honest, I don’t really want them.”

His mom huffs out a laugh. “Your dad didn’t really have the best fashion sense, did he?”

“No,” Andy agrees. “We can box them up and put them in the attic if you want.”

“Yes,” his mother says. “Okay.”

“I’m sorry, Mom,” Andy says, wrapping his arm around her and squeezing her shoulder.

“It’ll be okay, Andy,” his mother says. Andy knows this, but his mother is just realizing it for the first time. “We will be just fine.”

“Yes, Mom,” he says. “We will be.”

She pats his knee before bringing her hand to her face. “Go to Allison. I need some time,” she says. Andy nods and stands up, walking towards the door. “Hold onto her, Andy. She’s good for you.”

Andy smiles before nodding slowly again. “I will,” he says. He shuts the door behind him as he leaves.

“Is she okay?” Allison asks when Andy reappears. She’s folded the clothes and set them aside, clearing the floor and the couch.

Andy sits down next to her and grabs her hand. “She’ll be okay.”

Allison leans forward and kisses him lightly. Andy tangles his fingers in her hair and pulls her closer, deepening the kiss while still keeping it chaste. He loves her, loves how he feels with her. They’ve had a bit of a bumpy road to get where they are, but they’ll never end up like his parents, or hers for that matter.

“Are you okay?” Allison asks when she pulls back.

“I am,” he says. “I have you.”

Allison throws her head back in a magnificent laugh, a sound that makes his heart warm. “That was so cheesy.”

“Not untrue,” Andy says.

“No, not untrue,” Allison says before leaning forward and kissing him again.

~~
“Allison,” Brian asks from where he’s stretched out on the couch in Allison and Andy’s apartment. “Am I going to get an advanced copy of your book?”

“Sorry, those are only for my closest friends,” Allison teases. She’s writing in a notebook, either outlining her next novel or drawing.

“Fuck off,” Brian says, kicking her outstretched legs.

“I’m getting a shipment of them next week,” Allison says. “I can give you one after the reunion, if you want.”

“Of course I want,” Brian says. “I have to know what happens.”

Allison smiles but tries to smother it. She always gets embarrassed when anyone compliments her writing or the drawings she puts in her books. It took years for her to even admit to herself that she was talented.

“Hey,” Brian asks. “Whatever happened with your cousin?”

Allison sighs, leaning her head back. “I haven’t called her back,” she says. “Do you think I should?”

“I mean, it’s your decision,” Brian says. “But why wouldn’t you?”

Allison looks at him with a look in her eyes that he can’t decipher. He is surprised that she is still able to do that, still surprise him with looks he’s never seen before. They’ve been friends for ten years, but Allison is still an unpredictable person.

“I guess you’re right,” Allison says.

“Then, do it,” Brian says. Allison narrows her gaze at him.

“You’re a piece of work,” she says. “But fine.”

She stands up, walks over to the phone, and picks it up. “What, right now?” Brian asks, sitting up and watching her.

“You want me to so badly,” she says. Before she dials the number, she looks at Brian with her eyebrows knitted together. “What do I say to her?”

“Whatever you want,” he says. “Ask her everything you want to know.”

“You think?” Allison asks. Brian is always surprised when Allison shows her insecurities in front of him. Even though they’ve been friends for a decade, Allison can be hard for him to read unless she shows him.

“Yes,” Brian says. “You deserve it, Allie. You have more right than anyone to get answers about your family.” He stands up and gives her a quick hug. “I’ll leave you to it.”

“Brian,” Allison says as he grabs his coat. “Thank you.”

“Of course,” he says. “I’ll see you."

“Good bye, Bri,” Allison says, smiling at him.

“Bye,” Brian says. “Get your answers.”

Allison sends him a smile and as he leaves, he hears her dialing the phone number.

~~
When Andy gets home from work, the apartment is dark and quiet. Too quiet. Andy’s heart immediately starts to pick up speed. He dumps his keys and his wallet on the counter and rushes to the bedroom.

Just as he expected, just as he feared really, he finds Allison tucked under the covers, only the tips of her curls showing. Andy sighs quietly before kicking off his shoes and climbing on top of the covers until he is sitting next to her.

He’s quiet for a long moment, hoping that she’ll say something to break the silence but knowing that she won’t. He grips the edge of the comforter and gently pulls it back until he can see her face.

“Allie,” he whispers into the dark room. “What happened?”

Allison groans and rolls onto her back. She’s still quiet, staring up at the ceiling. Andy knows to wait, so he does. After what couldn’t have been less than ten minutes, her voice breaks through the dark.

“I called Marie back,” Allison says. Before Andy can ask who Marie is, Allison fills in the blanks for him. “My parents are still alive.”

“You called your cousin?” Andy asks, reaching over to comb his fingers through her hair.

“They never even left the state,” she says, ignoring the question. “Just me.”

Andy had feared something like this would happen. Allison’s been doing well lately, she hasn’t had a bad day in a long time, but Andy always knew deep down that it wouldn’t take much to push her over the edge again.

He lies down next to her and watches her side profile. He plays with her hair until she turns to face him again. She brings up her hand and touches his cheek. He can feel the cold metal of her engagement ring against his skin.

“It doesn’t matter,” she whispers, nudging his nose with hers. “I have you and you’re better than the lot of them.”

Andy smiles softly before leaning in to kiss her. “You do have me,” he says when he pulls back, “but it also matters.”

Allison hums noncommittally, kissing him again. “I’m fine, I promise,” she says.

“You’re not, but it’s okay,” Andy says. “Do you want to call Claire?”

“I would, but she’s with Bender meeting his mom,” Allison says. When Andy raises his eyebrows, she smiles. “We should all start a shitty parent support group.”

“Brian can mediate since he’s the only one with good ones,” Andy says. “You have counseling in a couple days, right?”

“Yes,” Allison says. “I’ll be okay. It just sucks.”

“It does,” Andy says. “Do you want to go to bed or do you want to go eat ice cream and watch a movie?”

Allison lets out a laugh and strokes his cheek with her thumb. “What about ice cream in bed?”

“There’s an idea,” Andy says. He looks at her face and sees the strength hidden in her smile lines. He loves her completely with every part of himself and he would do anything to keep her happy. “Vanilla or chocolate?”

“Chocolate, obviously,” Allison says, leaning back into the pillow.

Andy throws his legs off the bed and stands. As he walks out of the room, he hears Allison mumble, “I love you.”

Andy smiles and looks back at their bed, where Allison is buried in the sheets. “I love you too,” he says before disappearing into the kitchen to make Allison the biggest ice cream sundae he can manage.

~~

“This is a bad idea,” Bender says, fidgeting in his seat.

“We can leave,” Claire says, placing her hand on his knee and stroking her thumb back and forth.

“No,” Bender says. “But this is a bad idea.”

“It will be okay,” Claire says. “We can leave whenever you want.”

Bender nods and then stiffly inhales as he eyes the door. Claire looks up and sees a woman walking through the doors, a long scarf wrapped around her neck. She sees the resemblance immediately and is baffled that someone has existed in this world looking like John Bender this whole time. She can’t imagine what John must be thinking right now, so she slips her hand into his and squeezes.

He squeezes back as his mother makes her way over to the table. Claire looks at him and he looks back. They stand up to meet her, it seems like the polite thing to do.

“John,” the woman says when she approaches. “No need to stand for me,” she says. She smiles at Claire as they all sit down. It’s awkward, and John doesn’t say anything to make it any less awkward, so Claire takes initiative.

“Hello,” she says. “I’m Claire, John’s wife.”

“Hello, dear,” she says, smiling. “It’s so nice to meet you.”

Claire smiles politely and then turns to look at John. He meets her eye and opens his mouth like he wants to say something but doesn’t know what. After a second, he looks at his mother and says, “How… how have you been?”

“I’ve been just fine,” she says. “How about you?”

“Good,” he says. “We’ve been busy.”

“I can imagine. I remember those days,” she says, pulling her scarf off and holding it in her lap. “Two young ones running around.”

“How many kids do you have?” Bender says, finding Claire’s knee with his hand under the table. He seems relatively calm, calmer than Claire expected him to be.

“Including you? Five,” she says. “I’ve got two girls and three boys. The youngest just turned 18 this year. She’s starting college in the fall.”

Bender’s hand tightens on her knee when she includes him in the count of her children. It’s rather bold of her, Claire thinks, but she’s trying. “That’s nice,” Claire says.

“I’ve told them about you,” she says. “I’ve been looking for you.”

“Really,” John says and it’s not a question. “And what do they think about that?”

“They want to meet you,” she says, “but only if you’re okay with it.”

“Maybe,” John says, surprising Claire. “Someday.”

Bender’s mother smiles brightly at him. Before she can say anything else, the waitress interrupts them to get their drink and appetizer orders. When she walks away, Bender’s mother looks between Claire and John like she’s trying to understand how they fit together so well.

“Tell me about your children,” she says. “If you want to.”

Bender squeezes her knee under the table and she takes his signal. “Lily’s our oldest. She’s starting kindergarten in the fall.”

“Her name is Lily?” Bender’s mother says, her mouth dropping open. “After my mother?”

“Yes,” Bender croaks and then clears his throat. “She looked out for me.”

Bender’s mother sends her son an indiscernible look before looking back at Claire. Claire takes it as a cue to keep going, so she does. “Owen is three. He’s quiet, probably because Lily doesn’t let him get a word in very often.”

“That’s lovely,” she says. “Wonderful. Do you think you’ll have any more?”

Bender and Claire look at each other. It’s a question they get often from people and it’s always awkward, but it’s par for the course when you have a young family.

“Yes, I think so,” Claire says, pressing a soft hand to her abdomen under the table. She took a test when she and John got back from the city and it came back positive. They aren’t telling anyone yet, it’s too early and she isn’t showing yet.

“Probably not five, though,” Bender says and the joke startles a laugh out of his mother.

“I’m so glad you agreed to do this, John,” his mother says, tears springing from behind her eyes. “I know it must not have been easy for you, especially since I left you behind. But I am grateful for the second chance you’re giving me.”

“It’s…” John starts before cutting himself off with a cough. “It’s going to take time. It may never happen.”

“I know,” his mother says, eyes still glassy. She reaches over and grasps John’s free hand, the one not grasping Claire’s knee. “I’m just thankful that I get to see you again. I won’t ask for anything else.”

Claire watches John smile. To anyone else, it probably doesn’t look like much, but the tiny smile gives himself away to Claire. She rests her hand on top of his and traces her thumb across the veins on the back of his hand.

“So,” his mother says, looking between Claire and Bender again. “Tell me more about your lives.”

John does, less reluctantly than before, and Claire has never been more proud of him.

~~

When they were first together, peaking right after John’s dad died, Claire used to wake John up from nightmares all the time. She’s not surprised to see how gentle he is with their kids when they come into their room after having a bad dream. Usually, it’s Lily who ends up in their bed, which Claire attributes to her overactive imagination, but tonight it’s Owen.

Claire’s half asleep when she feels her son’s small body wiggle his way in between her and her husband. She hears John whisper-singing and when she rolls over, she sees him brushing back Owen’s hair and wiping away his tears.

Her eyes meet his over their son’s curly hair and she reaches out to rub Owen’s back. “Bad dream, baby?”

She sees her son’s small head nod in the dark. As her eyes adjust, she sees that Owen is gripping John’s hand and has his head tucked under his chin. Even though her little boy is scared, she can’t help but smile softly at the scene.

Lily was an unexpected surprise, but Owen was planned. She loves both her kids more than she ever thought possible and she can’t comprehend how her parents and John’s treated them the way they did. After meeting Bender’s mother today, Claire felt sympathy for her, but she knows that her actions still affect John today. She can’t forgive her completely, not yet.

They lie like this for a while, John whispering comforting words to Owen while Claire rubs his back gently. Soon enough, he stops crying and starts to drift off to sleep. Normally, they let their kids stay the night in their bed when they have nightmares, but tonight’s the night before the reunion and everyone needs to get their rest. John gets up and scoops the boy up in his arms. He’s gone for a few minutes, likely waiting to make sure Owen falls completely asleep in his bed before leaving.

When he comes back, he slides under the covers and immediately reaches for Claire. She scoots closer so he can wrap his arms around her, which he does but not before pressing a soft kiss to her lips. His feet are cold against hers but the rest of him is warm. She reaches up and pushes her hand through his hair. It’s shorter than it used to be, but it’s still long enough on the top for her to play with the strands.

He places his hands at her waist and rubs his thumbs in circles over her small bump. She remembers that the first time they did this, when she was pregnant with Lily, she was terrified of getting fat. She was surprised when John didn’t care, that he didn’t actually believe what he said in detention that day.

She was even more surprised to find that he still found her attractive, that he still wanted her. But he does, even after all this time, and she feels the same right back. They love each other the same way, but it’s deeper now. What started 10 years ago as a rebellion against her family and friends became the best thing she’s ever had.

She can’t believe that tomorrow, she's going to her ten year high school reunion. She finds it weird to think about a time when she knew nothing about the man lying next to her, back when he was cruel because he wanted her attention and she gave it willingly.

He intertwines his fingers with hers between them, bringing their knuckles up to his lips in the dark. He’s become more outwardly affectionate over the years, increasingly so as their ten year anniversary approached.

“We have to find a way to name this baby after Brian,” Claire whispers into the dark. “It’s his turn, even if it is a girl.”

Bender hums agreeably. Lily and Owen’s middle names are Allison and Clark respectively and Brian will be mad if this baby doesn’t have his name somewhere in there. “It’s going to be weird,” he says, and it takes a second for Claire to realize he’s changed the subject. “Seeing all those people tomorrow.”

“I didn’t think that you cared,” she says.

“I don’t,” he whispers back. “I wonder if Vernon will be there.”

“He probably will be,” Claire says. “Are you going to be okay?”

“Yeah,” John says, leaning forward and kissing her neck. “Never got to show my old man, but I can show Vernon.”

“Show him what?”

“That he was wrong about me.”

“He was,” Claire says, holding him close to her. She remembers their vice principal calling her husband worthless, and that was just what he said in front of other people.

Bender hums again. “I love you,” he says, easier now than it was when he first realized his feelings for her. “We gotta try to sleep so we aren’t dead on our feet tomorrow.”

“So sleep,” she says and she watches his breathing even out next to her.

~~

“God,” Laurie says, dropping her head between her knees. “Fuck.”

“Woah,” Brian says as he puts the car in park. They’ve just pulled into the parking lot of Shermer High for the reunion. He rubs his hand back and forth on her back. “What’s wrong?”

“God, I don’t want to go in there,” she says, her voice muffled by her hunched over position. “I’m so nauseous.”

“Deep breaths,” Brian says, unsure of how else he can comfort her.

“I told Anne it would be okay, but look at me,” she says, sitting up. Her face is red from all the blood that flowed to her head.

“Hey,” Brian says, running his fingers through her hair until he’s gently holding the back of her head. “We’re going to be fine. Just fine.”

Laurie nods but still doesn’t look sure. He leans in and presses a hard kiss to her lips. Brian has actually been looking forward to the reunion. There’s no one he is scared of seeing and he gets to go back to the place where he met his best friends and his future wife. But he knows that Laurie feels differently and that she’s anxious about seeing Olivia again.

“She might not even come,” Brian says when he pulls back.

“She will,” Laurie says. “But it’ll be okay.”

“Ready to go in?” Brian asks. “I think I see Anne and Stubby walking in right now.”

“Yes,” Laurie says. “I mean, no. But let’s go.”

~~

“Can you believe it’s been ten years?” Andy says, looking up at the school with Allison’s hand in his.

“Yes,” Allison says. “We were just kids back then.”

Andy supposes that she’s right. They’ve been through a lot since he used to frequent these halls. They’ve broken up, gotten back together, and traveled the world since then. He didn’t even feel like the same person he was when he went here anymore.

“We’ll probably say the same thing ten years from now,” Andy says, squeezing her hand.

Allison looks at him with that fond look she gets. Sometimes, when he thinks about those two and a half years where he had to live without her, he wonders how he ever thought he could live without her. She’s a part of him, as much as he’s a part of her. And it all started here, at this place in front of them.

“Let’s go in,” she says. “Brian’s probably been here for an hour already.”

Andy snorts. “You’re probably right. Hopefully he’s picked out a good table for us.”

“I wonder if Vernon still works here,” Allison says, voice quiet.

Andy looks at her and knows exactly what he’s thinking. “I guess we’ll find out.”

He keeps holding her hand as they walk through the doors.

~~

“I’ll meet you in there,” Bender says, extracting his arm from where it sits around Claire’s waist. “I gotta take a leak.”

Claire grimaces at his word choice but looks at the doors that lead to the gymnasium. “Are you sure?” She asks.

“Yes, Princess,” he says, getting her to roll her eyes. “I’ll be fine.”

And he was fine. He didn’t get lost going to the bathroom, the same bathroom he used to smoke in when he didn’t have time to sneak out to under the bleachers. He made his way back to the gymnasium and looks around, trying to see if he can spot Claire in the crowd.

He’s about to start walking around, trying to find his friends, when he hears a voice.

“Hello, Sir,” the voice says from behind him. Bender turns around and finds himself face to face with Richard Vernon. “Welcome back to Shermer High. Don’t forget to pick up a name tag.”

He wishes Claire weren’t already inside because she would get a kick out of this. Bender crosses his arms over his chest and coldly regards his former vice principal. “You don’t recognize me, do you?” Bender doesn’t think that he looks much different than he did ten years ago, but maybe he does.

“I’m sorry,” Vernon says, furrowing his brow. He looks much the same, just with more wrinkles. “It’s been a decade and my memory isn’t what it used to be.”

Bender snorts. “I find it hard to believe that you would have forgotten me, Dick.”

Vernon’s expression changes at the unfavorable nickname. “John Bender.” It isn’t a question, but Bender nods anyway. “I wouldn’t have expected you to show up here.”

“Why not?” Bender asks. “Think I would be dead in a ditch somewhere? Or in jail?”

Vernon frowns, sparing a glance around them to see if anyone is paying attention to their conversation. He must deem it appropriate to continue, because he says “Reunions don’t seem like something you’d be interested in.”

“Probably not,” Bender says. “But my wife wanted to come.”

Vernon narrows his gaze. “Wife?”

“Married five years now. She likes these kinds of things,” Bender says. “I thought it was a waste of time, especially since we had to find someone to watch the kids, but she insisted.”

“Kids,” Vernon says, eyebrow raised.

“It was also hard to find someone to cover for me at work,” he continues, determined to shove everything he can at this man. “Since I’m the owner and all.”

Vernon scoffs at him. “You’ve always been a liar, Bender.”

“You think I’m lying?” Bender is surprised that he would say it out loud.

“You’re a piece of shit,” Vernon hisses, careful to keep his voice down. “I don’t know why you’ve shown up here or what you have planned, but you are not going to ruin this day for everyone else.”

“I told you why I showed up here,” Bender says, refusing to let his anger show. “It’s your problem that you don’t believe me.”

Vernon flushes deep red and glares. “I don’t know what your goal here is, but-“

“There you are. I was wondering where you disappeared to.” Bender breathes a sigh of relief when he hears her. He feels her hand on his back as he places his arm over her shoulders. “Hi, Vice Principal Vernon.”

Vernon composes himself rather quickly and doesn’t let his surprise show. Instead, he looks at Claire’s name tag and smiles at her. “Hello, Ms. Standish.”

“Technically, it’s Mrs. Bender now, but they asked us to put our maiden names on the tags,” she says.

Vernon looks like he might stroke out in front of them. Bender can’t help but smile while he watches the man who used to terrorize him flounder.

“We should get back to our friends,” Claire says, tugging on the back of his shirt where Vernon can’t see. “It was nice to see you, Mr. Vernon,” she lies.

“Yes, it was nice to see you, Dick,” Bender says. “Just one suggestion though. You should probably consider retirement.”

Before he can say anything in response, Bender takes Claires hand and leads them away from their old vice principal.

“Jesus, John,” Claire whispers as she leads him toward a table in the back corner. “Are you okay?”

“I’m okay,” he says. “He thought I was lying.”

“He’s a complete asshole,” Claire says, her voice sharp with anger.

“Hey,” Bender says, lifting their joined hands and pressing a quick, uncharacteristic kiss to the back of hers. “I’m really fine.”

“Okay,” Claire says, squeezing his hand. “Let’s go find our friends.”

~~

Brian and Laurie are making their rounds, Laurie greeting old classmates that Brian has no recollection of. He keeps his hand on her back, as if feeling the fabric of her dress makes him feel less alien.

He catches Laurie playing with her ring, a nervous tic of hers, and Brian follows her line of vision to see where she’s looking. On the opposite side of the gym, he spots a blonde woman leaning against the wall, looking around the room in distain. She’s alone and she looks put together, but she’s already got a drink in hand.

Brian realizes that it’s Olivia.

Laurie explained that Olivia was cruel to her until she offered her protection, and Laurie felt like she couldn’t refuse. Being Mexican in a majority white town came with its own challenges and Laurie was trying to protect herself. Laurie has been apologetic, saying she got wrapped up in it and that she felt better about herself when Olivia would tear into someone. Brian has seen her cry many times about the person she used to be.

Connecting with Claire helped and having someone who understands made it a little bit better. Anne also helped, accepting Laurie as her friend once she had proof that she had changed.

He doesn’t know about Olivia.

Brian rubs Laurie’s back and leans down to whisper in her ear. “Are you okay?”

Laurie hums but turns toward him. “I’m not ready yet,” she says. “Can we sit down?”

“Of course,” Brian says. When they get back to the table, everyone is there. Laurie slips in next to Anne and Brian in the seat next to her. Bender is in the seat next to him and he bumps his knuckles against Brian’s shoulder.

“Hey, Bri,” Bender says. “How’ve you been?”

“Good,” Brian says. He hadn’t realized it had been so long since he’d seen his friend. “Laurie and I launched our business.”

“Yeah?” Bender says. “It’s going well?”

“Yeah, I think so,” Brian says. The truth is that they opened with really good numbers and things were looking very promising. He doesn’t want to jinx it though, so he doesn’t say it out loud.

Bender sees right through him of course, and he smirks. “I’m sure it’s great.”

“Hey, Brian,” Claire says. Brian missed them, it was good to have them back in one place. Andy and Allison are on the other side of the table, Andy sitting next to Stubby. They’re chatting like they never lost contact while Anne and Laurie whisper to each other next to him.

“Hey,” Brian says. They look good, like they’ve finally been able to get some rest. “How are the kids?”

“The same,” Bender says. “I don’t understand how they have so much energy.”

Claire looks around the room. “Do you think we should go socialize?” She asks. “We’re the only ones sitting down.”

“Sweets, I’m going to be honest with you,” Bender says, his arm along the back of Claire’s chair. “I would rather die.”

“Shut up,” Claire says, pinching his side. “I’m sure some of your old friends are here, too.”

“I doubt that very much, actually,” Bender says.

“We’ll go with you, Claire,” Anne says, nudging Laurie. Claire smiles and looks over at Allison.

“You’re going to make me,” Allison says and when Claire nods in response, Allison rolls her eyes. “Fine.”

Brian honestly doesn’t know why Claire is so adamant about talking to these people, but as long as he isn’t being dragged into the fire, he’s fine to sit and be quiet.

“You okay?” He whispers to Laurie. She just nods and threads her arm through Anne’s.

“We’ve got this,” she says, and Brian watches as the women stand up. Claire ruffles Bender’s hair as she joins them and then they’re off.

“That’s not going to end well,” Bender says, watching as Claire disappears into the crowd.

“No,” Brian says, agreeing. “I need a drink.”

Bender laughs, throwing his head back. “Let’s get some, then. Might make this go by faster.”

~~

Anne runs her hand absentmindedly over her bump while Laurie and Claire chatter away by her side. Allison stands quietly on her other side, and she looks over at her gratefully. She appreciates Allison Reynolds and her likewise discomfort at socializing with people she doesn’t know at an event she barely wants to be at.

She doesn’t know how Laurie talked her into this, she barely even wanted to come in the first place. But David is having a good time talking to Andy and his old classmates, she would never take it away from him.

No one seems to recognize her, or Allison for that matter, so they just stand off to the side while Claire and Laurie talk to people they used to be in clubs with.

“This is weird,” Allison whispers and Anne turns to face her.

“Yes, it certainly is,” Anne says. “I don’t know any of these people.”

“Andy and Stubby seem to be having a good time for themselves,” Allison says, nodding her head over to where the two men are talking animatedly to their old teammates.

“It’s weird to see him here,” Anne whispers, mostly to herself, but she sees Allison nod next to her.

“It really is,” Allison says.

She watches Laurie and Claire converse easily with old acquaintances. She is zoned out, thinking about how much longer David wants to stay here, when Allison grabs her arm.

“Don’t look now,” Allison says. “But the enemy is approaching.”

Anne can’t help herself, she looks. What she sees sends a shiver down her spine: Olivia walking up to her husband and smiling.

“What do I do?” Anne whispers, hands wrapped possessively around her bump.

“We go interrupt, that’s what we do,” Laurie says, whipping around and pulling herself out of the conversation she was having with her old classmates. Anne has never heard her so angry. She grabs Anne’s hand and pulls her along, Claire and Allison following quickly behind. Anne watches Allison pull Andy away, leaving just them, David, and Olivia.

She hears him talking to her before they reach them. “I don’t have anything to say to you,” David says, keeping his voice low so he didn’t draw attention to them.

“What? We were friends, weren’t we?” She says. She sounds genuinely confused and her face matches when she spots them approaching. “Laurie? Is that you? And Claire.”

“Hello, Olivia,” Laurie says, dropping her hand.

Anne feels light-headed just looking at her old tormentor. She feels a grounding arm slip around her waist and a kiss against the top of her head.

“Let’s go sit down,” David whispers, pulling her closer.

“No way,” Olivia says, looking at them. Anne feels like she might be sick, she really didn’t actually think Olivia would recognize her. “How did this happen?”

Anne gets angry at the implication of her words. She’s speaking before she can stop herself. “I hope you’ve been well, Olivia. If you’ll excuse us, we’re going to take our seats.”

“Wait,” Olivia says, but she doesn’t. She turns around and grabs David’s hand, pulling him along behind her.

~~

Laurie watches as Anne walks away, David at her side. She’s angry on her behalf and when she looks back at Olivia, she’s seething.

“Hello girls,” Olivia says, looking between her and Claire. “How have you been?”

Claire reacts first, considerably more calm than Laurie would have been. “We’ve been alright. Yourself?”

Olivia smiles. “I’ve done a lot of traveling. I just couldn’t stay in this godforsaken town any longer.” She takes a sip from her drink. “But I couldn’t pass up the chance to see what happened to all my old classmates.” The wicked look she sends in Anne and David’s direction makes Laurie’s blood boil.

“Right,” Claire says. Laurie feels her eyes on her.

“What about you? What have you been up to?” Olivia asks. Laurie wonders how she still has the profound ability to make a person feel inadequate without saying anything substantial.

Claire waits for a second, likely waiting for Laurie to say something, but she speaks when she doesn’t. “Uh, I’m married with two kids. I’m the VP of the company I work at,” she says.

“Whatever happened to that guy you dated at the end of senior year?” Olivia asks, leaning against the wall. “Did he end up in jail?”

Laurie watches Claire narrow her gaze at Olivia. “No,” Claire says, her voice fierce. “I married him.”

“Are you serious?” Olivia asks. Laurie really wants to walk away from this conversation. “That’s unexpected,” she says, mostly to herself. She turns to Laurie and her stomach drops. “What about you, Laurie?”

“I’m engaged,” Laurie manages to say. “I’m starting a business.”

“Very nice,” Olivia says as if Laurie was asking for her approval. Laurie might have, years ago, but she couldn’t care less about Olivia’s opinion now. “Well ladies, this has been a nice catch-up, but we should go back to our tables.”

“Right,” Laurie says, crossing her arms over her chest.

“Maybe I’ll see you around later,” Olivia says.

“Maybe,” Claire says, but when Olivia turns and walks away, she shakes her head.

“God,” Laurie says as she and Claire make their way toward their table. “Is it bad that I wish she was doing worse? Maybe then I would feel vindicated.”

“It’s an act,” Claire says simply. “It’s always been an act.”

When Laurie gets back to the table, Brian doesn’t say anything. He just slips his hand into hers and squeezes.

Laurie is happy with her lot in life and that’s all that matters.

~~

“Should we sneak off?” Andy asks. He mostly says it to Allison, but he looks at each of his friends in question.

“Sure,” Allison says, laying her hand on top of his.

“Anywhere is better than here,” Bender says and although she looks like she wants to argue with him, Claire keeps quiet.

“Library?” Andy suggests conspiratorially and Bender laughs at his tone.

“I was counting on it, actually,” Brian says. “Wanna come?”

The question is addressed to Laurie, who shrugs. Anne and David took off a little while ago, so if she stayed behind, she would be sitting alone.

“I don’t want to intrude,” Laurie says.

“Shut up,” Bender says before Andy can. “It’s a library. You wouldn’t be intruding on anything.”

“I would hope not,” Andy mutters, earning his hand a tight, chastising squeeze from Allison.

“Do you think they’ll stop us?” Brian asks, dropping his voice.

“Not if we walk with purpose,’ Claire says and Bender snorts.

“Lead the way, Princess,” Bender says and then they’re off.

Like Claire suggested, they walk with purpose, and no one stops them or even gives them a second glance. Andy holds Allison’s hand the whole time, walking through the hallways they used to frequent as kids.

Luckily for them, the library door is unlocked and they slip inside without detection. The first thought that crosses Andy’s mind when they pass through the doorway is that the room looks a lot smaller than he remembered it being.

“This is a bit surreal,” Allison says quietly. When Andy looks at her, he sees her gaze locked on the table in the back. “It’s still set up the same way.”

“They’re lazy assholes,” Bender says and he slips his arm around Claire’s waist.

“C’mon,” Andy whispers, pulling on Allison’s hand. “Follow me.”

They slip away from their friends, who have split off into couples, and make their way up to the second level. He sits on one of the benches, Allison pressing her leg against his.

“What are you thinking?” Allison asks, her hand on his knee.

“That this is weird,” Andy says. “That I love you. I loved you here.”

“I love you too,” Allison says. “We were different people when we were here.”

“Not that much different,” Andy says, leaning his head against hers. “I hope that I’m less of a jerk now.” He thinks back to the things he said in detention, the things he accused Bender of.

“You are,” Allison says. “Look at you and Bender. You’re practically best friends now.”

He smiles, warm with the knowledge that someone knows him well enough to basically read his thoughts.

“We’re getting married,” Andy says. “To think, if Vernon never sent us out to get those Cokes…”

“I never would have known that the jock I saw around school sometimes had important things to say,” Allison says with a glint in her eye.

“Shut up,” Andy says, but he kisses her anyway.

The room is quiet, and Andy has never been more happy than he is right in this moment.

~~

“Which was your seat?” Laurie asks, rubbing her hand up and down Brian’s back. She follows him as he walks to the desk to the right and places his hand on the table.

“Right here,” he says, his gaze dreamy and far away.

Laurie doesn’t fully understand Brian’s friend group and their attachment to the memory of detention. They met here and against all odds, they became friends, but Laurie can’t comprehend how a table in a library could make her fiancé look the way he is right now. She follows his look down to the table.

“You carved your name here?” Laurie asks, dragging her finger over the weathered letters.

“Yeah,” he says. “I wanted to leave a mark.”

She traces over the words. Brian ’84. The Nerd., they say. She smiles despite herself, thinking back to how sweet Brian was that year and how much she liked him, even though she was trying not to.

“Hey,” he says, reaching over and covering her hand with his. “Come somewhere with me?”

Laurie doesn’t even answer, just furrows her brow, before Brian is pulling her along behind him and out of the library.

Before she can ask where they’re going, Brian pulls her down a hallway and into a classroom. It takes her a few seconds to realize where she is due to the updated equipment. She’s being pressed against the door before she can even get a word in.

“You’re such a romantic,” she says after he pulls away from a kiss. “I didn’t know what I was doing. I made you pasta.”

“And I loved it,” Brian says before leaning down and pressing a kiss to the under side of her chin. “Although at first, I thought you were making fun of me.”

“Really?” Laurie asks. She never knew that, but with the way that she had been acting back then, she can see how he may have thought that.

“I didn’t know what to make of your attention,” Brian says, pressing his thumbs to her hips.

Laurie grabs Brian’s face between her hands and pulls him so they’re nose to nose. “I liked you so much,” she says. “I didn’t know what to do with all of it.”

Before he can respond with something sickeningly sweet, Laurie leans in and kisses him. Under the fluorescent lights in the home ec classroom, she loves him how she has always wanted to.

~~

“I wanted you so bad,” Bender says as he stands between her legs in front of the table. “You were sitting right there in that skirt and I wanted you.”

Andy and Allison had escaped upstairs a while ago and when Claire saw Brian and Laurie leave, she had leapt onto the desk and looked up at her husband.

“You were an asshole that day,” Claire says back, winding her fingers in the hair on the back of his neck. “You wouldn’t stop calling me a tease.”

“It felt like you were at the time. I liked you, I thought you were hot, and you didn’t like me.”

“I liked you,” Claire says while Bender leans down and buries his face in her neck. “Against my better judgement, of course. You’re lucky I didn’t come to my senses.”

“Who knows what would have happened if you did,” Bender says and then presses a kiss to the skin beneath his lips.

“You would have turned out fine,” Claire whispers. She believes it too, knowing him better than anyone else. “You’ve always had it in you. I had nothing to do with it.”

Bender pulls back and shakes his head. “You had everything to do with it. You know that.”

“You realize you did the same for me,” Claire says. “I would have turned out just like my parents.”

“I don’t know about that,” Bender says.

“Agree to disagree, then,” she says. “I wanted you too. I liked the flannel.”

“The flannel is what did it for you?”

“Among other things,” she says, brushing her thumb across his cheek bone. He leans down to kiss her softly.

“If you hadn’t skipped school to go shopping, none of this would have happened.”

“I wouldn’t have that leather jacket either.”

“That would be a real shame.”

When they first got together, Claire assumed that Bender would treat her badly. She was wrong, of course, but she wondered if he would spit vitriol at her like he did that day in detention.

He kept her at arms length for a while which worried her but she wore him down over time. She doubted him because she couldn’t help it, everyone she’d ever counted on had let her down.

But everything is different now, they’re raising a family, and she trusts him more than anyone else on the planet. It all started here, at this desk, in this place, and she’s never been more thankful.

~~

When the group makes it back to the gym, the crowd has thinned out significantly. Allison looks over at Claire, and when their eyes meet, Allison knows that it’s over.

“We survived,” Bender says. “Can we cut our losses and go?”

“Yes please,” Allison adds.

On their way out, they’re offered gift bags full of Shermer High merchandise. Allison barely offers it a second glance before passing hers off the Andy.

Allison links arms with Claire as they walk out the doors, leaving their old high school behind.

She doesn’t mind leaving the past in the past, as long as her future is this, with these people.

“Dinner at Linguine’s next week?” Brian asks as they reach their cars.

“Sounds great,” Claire says. She pulls her arm from Allison’s and pulls her into a tight, fierce hug. Allison tucks her face into her best friend’s neck and smiles.

When she lets go, everyone starts hugging, acting like it’s the last time they’ll ever see each other. Allison wraps her arms around Laurie, then Brian, and finally Bender.

“Nutcase,” Bender mumbles as a goodbye.

Allison feels Andy slide his arm around her waist. It grounds her like it always does when she feels like she’s floating away.

“Well,” Claire says, standing next to Bender and looking at all of them. “See you later.”

Allison looks at her friends one by one, realizing how much they’ve changed. Claire is much less insecure and she owns it. Bender has learned how to let people in and is a better father than anyone could have expected. Brian wears his confidence on his sleeve and Laurie is his rock, a constant calming presence that keeps him grounded and pulls him out of his head when he gets lost up there. And Andy, he’s in a different category altogether. Allison is grateful for his trust everyday.

Despite the change, they’ve all managed to stay together, and Allison thinks that’s pretty incredible.

“See you,” Laurie says.

As they walk away from each other, Allison feels a weird sinking in her stomach. She doesn’t know why, especially since they’ve made plans to see each other within the week, but leaving the reunion feels like the end of a story somehow.

“What are you thinking?” Andy asks after they settle in their parked car.

“I don’t know,” Allison says. “I can feel my life changing in this moment. I can see it.”

Andy pauses for a moment, looking at her from the driver’s seat. When he speaks next, he says, “Am I still there next to you, in this changing life of yours?”

He’s smiling, obviously teasing her, but Allison reaches out and brushes his cheek with the light pressure of her thumb. “You are this life.”

Andy turns his head and presses a kiss to the palm of her hand. “I’m honored,” he says. “You’re mine, too.”

“I’m just-“ she cuts herself off, looking out the windshield at the school and then over at her friends’ cars as they pull out of the parking lot. “I didn’t realize so much had changed.”

When Allison drops her hand, Andy catches it. He rubs his thumb over her fingers tenderly, in a way that makes Allison feel known. “So much has changed,” Andy says, “but we’re still us, and they’re still them. It’s always going to be that way.”

“Always?”

“We won’t let you get away with leaving again, if that’s what you’re asking,” Andy says, eyes twinkling with amusement before turning serious again. “We’re family, as good and real as blood.”

Allison leans over and presses a lingering kiss to his mouth. “Okay,” she says.

“Ready to go?” Andy asks. She leans back so they can both put their seatbelts on.

“Onwards and upwards,” Allison says, and he puts the car in drive.

Notes:

And fin!

Thank you to everyone who has stuck with this fic series. This started as a fun little writing exercise but then it turned into, well, this. I started with the first installment in this series my freshman year of college and now I'm about to graduate. It's crazy how fast time flies!

But seriously, thank you to everyone who read this story and liked what I did with the characters. I hope I did my favorite movie justice.

For now, I'm done writing for the Breakfast Club, but you never know what the future may bring. I'll continue to write for other fandoms, so stick around if you want to!

Thanks for all the love and support. Let me know what you think!

-trouvailleamor

Notes:

Additional Spoiler Warnings for pregnancy and child birth.

Happy Thanksgiving to all my American readers! Here is the first chapter of an epilogue because I can't seem to let these characters go. I'm not sure when the next part will be posted, but in the meantime, drop a kudos and a comments to let me know if you like it so far! Thank you for reading and I hope you liked it!

Series this work belongs to:

• Part 4 of The Breakfast Club