Chapter Text
Thanatos walked quickly down the hall as he glanced at the time on his phone. The weekly strategy meeting should just be getting out and Than hoped he could catch Patroclus before he went on to other work. He had been his favorite professor at the Academy and if anyone could give him advice on working with a difficult partner it was him.
Everyone in the Academy- no, the world, knew the story, Patroclus had made a daring but dangerous move on Scissure and had been injured in the process. Instead of retreating his partner Achillies continued to pilot by himself and took down the kaiju single handedly, becoming the only person to ever do so. They were celebrated as heroes, but it had cost them both of their careers. Patroclus lost his right leg due to his injuries, and Achillies could never pilot again due to the massive strain he had undertaken piloting alone. What the stories didn’t include, is that the mission nearly tore them apart. They were partners in life as well and the tension between them in the months after was whispered about in every corridor. He thought Patroclus might have some insight on how he could fix things with Zagreus. Than knew he couldn’t keep his anger up, but had no good ideas on how to dispel it once and for all.
He waved to the various heads of departments and techs that streamed out of the meeting room, he was perfectly on time. He found Patroclus sitting alone, still pouring over the meeting notes.
“Ah, Thanatos, long time no see” he looked up and smiled as Thanatos walked over
“I’ve been very busy recently sir, but I was hoping you might have time for a word, privately?”
“You can drop the sir, but of course I have time for you Thanatos”
“Thank you—”
Patroclus grabbed his crutches and they wandered down the hallways for a bit before Patroclus made a sharp turn towards the hangar bay.
“You’ve been doing great work on those restorations recently, very quick work” he commented as they continued down the hall.
Thanatos felt himself flush a little, he was usually so caught up in his work and thoughts he forgot other people monitored his progress.
“Oh, yes they’ve become somewhat of a passion project of mine”
Patroclus stopped near a secluded ledge overlooking the hangars, “Though I don’t think that’s what you’re here to talk to me about, is it?”
Thanatos silently shook his head, “I’m sure it was discussed in the meeting”
“That the prodigal son has returned?”
Thanatos laughed despite himself, “that is one way of putting it I suppose”
“And you need advice?”
“If you are willing to give it”
“Well for the sake of this operation and the world, I better try my best”
Thanatos paused looking towards where the Jaegers stood silent in their bays waiting for the next opportunity. He knew Patroclus was trying to make light, but what if the world did depend on him and Zagreus? And now that he was here where should he begin?
“Were you angry with Achillies after the accident?”
Patroclus let out a whistle, “I was absolutely furious but” he shook his head “even if I had been conscious I would not have been able to stop him, he was determined, he thought he was doing the right thing and on occasion I have called him single minded”
Thanatos sighed, “Sounds like Zagreus”
“If it is not intruding may I ask what happened? The only important detail in the meeting was that he had returned”
“He left to find his mother, whom he had spent years searching for without success and he had finally gotten a lead on where she might be. Which I’m glad for, that was—difficult for him. But he did all this without telling me or saying goodbye, I woke up one day and he was gone. The next time I heard from him was seeing him here. Over a year of silence” he shrugged. It felt good to let it out to someone that knew what it was like.
Patroclus hummed in understanding and paced for a moment.
“And now you must remember what it is like to have him back?”
“It’s more that I need to figure out how to forgive him, I think I am holding us back, not him. He’s excited to be back, he kept up his training, he’s tried to talk to me but—”
“But you’re hurt.” Patroclus added.
“Yeah, I accepted he was never coming back and now he just shows up—”
“And now you’re asking why”
Thanatos stopped, that was exactly it, he needed to know why.
Patroclus smirked at him, a memory returning to him, “I know because that’s what I asked Achilies when he came to see me after the accident, well first I kissed him and then I said why the fuck did you do that?!”
Thanatos laughed, “What did he say?”
“He looked surprised that I even asked, like the answer was obvious, for you, he said, I did it all for you”
“For you” Thanatos repeated softly, he was slowly putting the pieces together. He thought back to the Drift. The memories of them together at the Academy, sparring, studying, hanging out, those were among the brightest from Zag’s side. He had seen glimpses of Zagreus in Greece, but now that he concentrated he looked sad, lost almost.
“He said he came back because his mother told him to, she said he belonged here”
“He does, he belongs here with you”
“It still hurts—”
“It will for a while, it will pass eventually, but know that you would have never been able to change his mind, so there is no use dwelling on the past”
“Achilies wouldn’t take it back?”
“Not for a instant, and I suspect Zagreus will give you the same answer”
Thanatos nodded, even if he didn’t like it he knew Patroclus was right. Zagreus was not one for regrets.
“Thanks for the advice, I—I have a lot to think about”
“It is what I’m here for” Patroclus smiled “I think you know what to do now”
“I sure hope so, for all our sakes”
The next day Zagreus found Thanatos sitting in the far corner of the mess studying his tablet with lunch.
“Can I sit here?”
Thanatos shrugged, internally he was surprised Zagreus even asked, but he honestly didn’t care either way.
“Sure”
They sat in awkward silence as Zagreus scarfed down his spaghetti, Thanatos wasn’t sure if Zagreus actually wanted to sit here or if he just wanted to avoid the awkward questioning he would find at any other table.
He glanced up as Zagreus cleared his throat and started rummaging in his bag for something.
“Than, I uh got you something from Greece, Mother, I mean Persephone helped me make it”
He didn’t respond as he accepted the hastily wrapped package from Zagreus’ hand. He let out a small gasp as he unwrapped it and turned it over in his hands. It was a large purple butterfly, well but not expertly prepared in a simple frame.
“For your collection” Zagreus added as Thanatos continued to stare.
“It’s beautiful” Thanatos mused, “you prepared it?”
“Well I caught it, and Peresphone helped me fix it up in the frame, but she let me do most of it!” Zagreus said proudly.
“Tha—Thank you Zagreus” Thanatos responded with a rare smile, Zagreus had stood up and was beaming with pride. This was the happiest he had looked since he’d arrived.
“You’re welcome Than” he beamed, “I’ve gotta go, but catch you later” he said standing up and grabbing his tray.
Thanatos managed a small wave as Zagreus walked away, he was overwhelmed by Zag’s thoughtfulness.
He walked back to his room after lunch and sat at his desk, knees to his chest turning the gift over in his hands. Zagreus had obviously been thinking of him even while he was away. Patroclus words echoed in his head “For you, I did it all for you” He hadn’t thought of what Zagreus might have felt half a world away in Greece. Not daring to make contact, had Hades been looking for him?
Something Thanatos hadn’t considered popped into his head, Zagreus had—missed him. It was becoming increasingly obvious to him now, but before, he was so blinded by his own rage he hadn’t even considered Zagreus’ point of view. He glanced at the butterfly again, a deeply personal gift. Not just a throwaway souvenir. His heart twinged in a strange way as he admired the butterfly fondly, it felt like something had changed between them. He considered that maybe this could be a new start between them.
His phone buzzed, surprising him. He exhaled when he saw it was just Meg.
“Wanna finally share that bottle tonight?”
He let out a soft laugh, he had forgotten all about Meg’s promise from a few days ago, but he definitely could use a night off.
“Gods please”
“You made it!” Meg exclaimed as she opened the door. Her hair was down and she had already changed into pajamas. He could smell popcorn already made as he walked inside, Meg always pulled out all the stops.
“Of course” Thanatos rolled his eyes, like he had ever missed one of Meg’s night off invites.
“I was worried you were going to be too busy brooding over Zagreus in your room” she laughed at him pulling out a bottle from under her desk.
Thanatos huffed as he settled in his favorite chair, “I’m fine Meg”
“That huff didn’t sound fine”
“Fine, he gave me a gift at lunch today, from Greece”
“Ohhhh, what was it?” Meg asked curiously as she pushed a plastic cup into Than’s hand.
“A butterfly that he caught and prepared himself”
Meg took a deep drink from her cup and Thanatos followed suit, letting the slow warmth flow through him.
“What is this stuff? It’s dangerously good” he asked
Meg turned over the bottle, “Uh it says, Dionysus’ Ambrosia” she shrugged “it was new at that little corner shop so why not”
Than was already taking another drink, he really needed to relax more often he thought.
“Anyways, he got you a butterfly?! Than that’s—that’s so thoughtful. I know how much your collection means to you” her voice trailed off in surprise.
“Yeah, I didn’t think he had it in him either. I guess it never occurred to me that he could miss me, Meg”
She smirked at him over the top of her cup, a silent laugh in her eyes. Thanatos narrowed his eyes, annoyed.
“What’s with the smirk? First Patroclus, now you, I feel like there’s a joke I’m missing”
She laughed out loud this time as she settled into sitting on the bed, “Oh Than, you and Zagreus are” she paused, “funny”
“Funny?” he said incredulous
“I’m sure Patroclus sees it too, at the Academy, you never fully trusted each other, always dancing circles around each other, both too afraid to just talk.
Thanatos sat silently, taking a sip from his cup as he considered what Meg had said. Did he trust Zag? He found he couldn’t come to an answer, maybe the alcohol was to blame.
“You thought he didn’t miss you!? He’s your best friend your partner, Than come on, of course he missed you” she insisted.
“But—but he left”
“Yeah, and that was stupid and you should be mad, hell I’m mad at him about that. But he came back Thanatos, we both know Zagreus doesn't do anything anyone tells him to do, he does what he wants. He definitely didn’t come back to see Hades that’s for sure” she paused to drink again, “the only option left is that he came back for you”
“Ugh, I hate that you’re right, you and Patoclus both”
She laughed into her cup, relishing in her victory. “So what are you going to do now?”
“I guess I’ll talk to him tomorrow, apologize, try to fix it”
“Good, I don’t like to see you brooding, this was supposed to be fun! Now do you want to watch a movie or hear the latest gossip I got from Dusa?”
“Hmmmm gossip then movie” Thanatos downed the last of his cup “if we make it that far” he laughed
“Okay so yesterday Dusa told me she had a delivery down to the labs” Meg said as she refilled Thanatos’ cup. He hummed approvingly.
“And she thinks she ran into those scientists kissing”
Thanatos struggled not to laugh and spit at the same time, “Asterius and that weird kaiju guy oh what's his name?”
“Theseus, the one always saying the kaiju are demons from the deep and calling then blackguards for some reason?”
Than rolled his eyes, the few occasions he had met Thesus had been awful, the man was completely full of himself and never knew when to shut up.
“Yes that one, wait did she actually see them kissing?”
“She said the door was open a little bit so she just walked in but then she heard them talking because you knoooow how loud Theseus is, and he was like “oh my sweet Asterius” and she heard a kissing noise so she walked back out waited a couple minutes, knocked on the door and heard them run to their sides of the lab and they looked very flustered, especially Theseus she said”
“Oh my god they were kissing weren’t they?”
Meg laughed, “and I thought it was weird they were friends at all”
“I just feel like Asterius could do better, Thesus is so annoying”
She shrugged “One man’s trash is another mans ... I mean bull … bullmans? Treasure."
Than drank again thinking, he was definitely starting to feel the effects in a pleasant hazy way.
“What do you think Thesus sounds like having sex?” he pondered out loud, laughing when it was Meg’s turn to do a spit take. “Does he just talk about how great he is at it the whole time?” he continued since Meg was laughing too hard to contribute. He mustered up his best impression, “Oh Asterius would you not agree that I am the best giver of sex in this entire operation! No one can match my stamina—”
“Thanatos! Stop I’m fucking dying” Meg wheezed out almost spilling her drink.
The imagined exploits of Theseus and Asterius continued long into the night becoming more and more grand until the participating members collapsed from exhaustion and inebriation.
Thanatos woke up the next day with a blazing headache, like he usually did after hanging with Meg. He chugged some water and took some pain pills to cope. Luckily it was his weekend, he had some work to catch up on but he could take his time. He pulled out his phone and stared at Zag’s contact. He knew he should talk to him but what would he even say. His phone went back into his pocket and he headed over to the mess to actually eat something.
“THAAAAAANATOS!!!!” called out a voice across the mess as Than turned around with his tray, he winced at his brother’s enthusiastic call, but walked over to meet him. Hypnos was sitting to the side with the largest coffee cup possible in his hands. Not that it would do him any good, Thanatos knew better. He was convinced his brother was immune to caffeine but that didn’t stop Hypnos from trying every new kind available to him in excessive amounts.
“Hey Hypnos” he sat down across from him, giving him a small smile.
“Thanatos! I haven’t seen you in ages, I know you’re busy but you should really come down to requisitions more often, I’ve been doing really great work, even Mom said so!” he said excitedly.
Thanatos poured syrup on his pancakes as he listened to his brother ramble on about his job and whatever new requisition drama had happened. He was happy Hypnos was doing better, but as the most talkative of his siblings he could only stand it so long.
“I saw Zagreus in the hallway yesterday actually!”
Thanatos nodded with his mouth full.
“I’m sure you’re excited he’s back”
“Thrilled”
“Well, he looked excited to be back so maybe he could help you out with that!” Hypnos continued, returning Than’s sarcasm.
“Do you need any more help with work?” Than asked, desperate to change the subject.
“Oh nope! I’m doing great ever since you said I could make lists just for me! And they started letting me leave early so I don’t fall asleep at my desk anymore!”
“That’s—that’s great Hypnos!” a note of pride fell into Than’s voice.
“Thanks Thanatos! It means a lot coming from you, my only complaint is that you never come down anymore, so more work to be done!”
“I’ll try harder” he answered earnestly, he knew he should spend time with Hypnos and with their mother, but there always seemed to be more work to be done.
Hypnos dove back into his well of never ending work stories as Than finished his breakfast, and for once Thanatos appreciated he wasn’t expected to respond.
“It was great catching up with you here ,Than but promise you’ll come see me sometime? Pleaaaasseeee?” he gave Thanatos his best puppy dog eyes.
“I promise I’ll come by when I’m less busy”
“Aw man that means never! I know how you are Than, work, work, work, all the tiiiiiiime”
“I will try to come by sooner, or see you here again”
“Okay, okay I’m gonna hold you to that!” Hypnos said excitedly as he got up from the table, leaving Thanatos alone again.
Than’s phone buzzed on the table as he started to clean up.
Hey can I talk to you about something?
His breath caught in his throat, it was Zagreus, what did he want?
Right now? He replied
If you’re free, I’m at your secret spot
Not much of a secret I guess, now I gotta find a new one
Sorry not sorry
I’ll be up soon
The conversations he had with Patroclus and Meg ran through his head as he grabbed his coat and headed up the stairs, he had so much he wanted to say but that would have to wait. He needed to see what Zagreus wanted first.
He climbed on the roof to see Zagreus feeding the sea gulls and talking to them?
“Hey now you’ve gotta share I’ve only got so much” he heard faintly from Zag’s direction.
“I see you’ve found new friends” he announced trying not to laugh.
“Hey Than” Zagreus replied, his back to Than handing out the last few morsels in his hand.
Than stretched as he looked out towards the city across the water from them, it was a clear day, perfect for watching the ships go by, which he sometimes did on the weekends.
“Am I gonna have to find a new secret spot or are you going to find your own?”
“Aw we can’t share Than?” Zagreus said joining him by the railing, teasing.
“That defeats the purpose of a secret spot”
“Don’t worry you can keep this one, just haven’t found my own yet”
“How kind of you”
They stood in silence for a few moments, entranced by the ocean, Thanatos was trying to let Zagreus go at his own pace, he was the one that called him up in the first place.
“Thanatos?” Zagreus finally said
“Yes?” Zagreus hardly ever used his full name, this must be serious then.
“The—Drift, yeah the Drift” there was a sad note to Zagreus’ voice he hardly ever heard.
“What—about it?”
“It hurt, it hurt so fucking bad Than, that’s—that’s how you felt?! When I left? I thought you would have figured it out, but I was so naive” he started pacing, Thanatos could see the tears welling in his eyes.
“It’s all I’ve been able to think about Than, that I hurt you like that, that you mourned for me, that you thought I wasn’t coming back, no wonder you thought I didn’t care, what—what would I have done? I’m surprised you didn’t just slap me that first day”
“I almost did”
“Heh, probably should have honestly, I deserved it, but I—I know I said I was sorry earlier and you said you didn’t trust me, and I didn’t understand at the time. To me it was obvious—”
“That you came back because of me?” Than interrupted, it wasn’t entirely Zagreus' fault. He too had let his emotions get in way of the facts.
“Yeah! Yeah, wait—”
“You could say I’ve been doing some thinking of my own the last few days”
“You mean having drinks with Megara”
Than rolled his eyes, “we are friends you know, that’s what friends do, but I also spoke to Patroclus if you must know that I actually got seasoned advice as well”
Zag chuckled and his face turned serious again, “Yeah, I came back because of you”
“Did Hades know?”
“Nope, that was probably the best part; but to assure you—yes, I made all these decisions on my own. Persephone encouraged me to come back but I actually made the choice myself, because I wanted to come back I wanted to see you again, you’re my best friend Than”
When Zagreus said friend, he felt his heart wince again like it had with the butterfly. But why, they had always been friends, best friends even. There was that difference again, something was changing.
He felt Zag’s warm arms wrap around his chest before he realized the other man was pulling him in for a hug, and he slowly lifted his arms to return the favor. Zagreus smelled faintly like pomegranates, something Thanatos had never noticed before, but could not ignore now.
Zagreus’ tears were wet on Than’s cheek before he noticed Zagreus was sobbing into his chest.
“All I can say is I’m sorry Thanatos, but I understand if you don’t forgive me, we can make it work somehow no matter what happens” he said quietly
Thanatos stood silently for several moments, his arms still around Zagreus, letting him release it all. He waited until Zagreus went still in his arms before speaking.
“I forgive you Zagreus, I truly do. I’m ready to be partners again, for everyone's sake” and he meant it. He couldn’t hold a grudge if he wanted to be a great Jaeger pilot and if he was being honest he had missed having Zagreus around. He wanted to start again, he wanted his friend back.
“Thanks—thanks Than” came the muffled reply
They broke apart and Zagreus had a huge smile on his face as he wiped away his tears.
“You know what this means Than? It’s about time we kick some Kaiju ass!”