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Junk in the Trunk

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“You coming to bed, now?” Steve asks, running his hand down Bucky’s side to the waistband of his sweats and dipping his head down to kiss the part of his shoulder where skin meets metal.

Bucky bends forward and spits out a mouthful of toothpaste before straightening to meet Steve’s eyes in the mirror. “Straight to bed this time, I swear.”

Steve smiles and keeps his comments to himself, just pats Bucky’s side and leaves the bathroom. Bucky rinses his mouth out and washes his face before shutting off the light and walking back into the bedroom. Steve is lying in bed with a book propped up against his legs, knees tucked up and all of the pillows keeping him in a mostly upright position. Bucky makes a show of yawning and stretching, making sure he has Steve’s full attention before bending over and picking up the shirt and socks he discarded earlier. If he flexes a little while tossing them into the hamper, well who’s to fault him?

Steve is watching him all right, more amused than enticed, but his eyes wander the planes of Bucky’s naked chest with not a little bit of interest. Steve closes the book and sets in on the night stand, crossing his arms over his chest.

Bucky looks up with all of the innocence he can muster – which admittedly is not very much. “What? Oh, don’t let me distract you.”

“You? A distraction? Not at all. You know, for a spy, you have all of the subtlety of fireworks.”

“I have no idea what you mean,” Bucky says, hooking his thumbs into his pants. “Just getting ready for bed.”

“Mmm,” he hums skeptically, not taking his eyes off Bucky.

Bucky shoves his pants down to the floor and kicks them back into the closet before standing up, putting his hands on his hips and posing a lot like Steve does when he thinks no one is looking.

Steve is quiet for a moment, brows furrowed in confusion and then it clicks. “Your shorts. Why do your shorts have ears? And a…”

“Trunk?” He asks, swinging his hips from side to side to get a good movement going. “You like the trunk best, Steve. Admit it.”

And Steve can’t look away, his face caught somewhere between curiosity and horror, so Bucky gives a solid pelvic thrust, barely holding in a laugh. Steve makes a sound like something in him is dying and he finally looks up. “Why do you have elephant underwear? I almost want to ask why I haven’t seen them before, but I don’t think I want to know. Those… those are terrifying.”

“Aww, Steve,” Bucky says, walking up to the side of the bed and rolling his hips all the way there. “I’m hurt you don’t know I wear these under my uniform every day. Elephants are lucky or something, right?”

“Those are…” Steve looks a little helpless, but then the shock fades away and he laughs. Actually doubles over, forehead pressed to his knees and laughs and laughs and laughs. His shoulders are shaking and Bucky lets himself smile at the picture they make.

“You know, you can really bruise a guy’s ego, laughing at him after he takes his pants off.”

“You just…” Steve chokes out, turning to Bucky, face pink, tears forming in the corners of his eyes. He doesn’t finish the sentence, just laughs harder, peals of laughter like Bucky hasn’t heard since before the war. He’s actually gasping for breath and there was a time when that would have concerned him, but now he’s just pleased.

Steve is trying to catch his breath, so Bucky presses his advantage and pushes Steve’s shoulder, sending him over onto his side. He sprawls onto his back and Bucky climbs onto the bed and straddles his waist, pinning him down to the bed. Steve, of course, is still laughing, shaking the bed and Bucky both, now. After nearly a full minute of more laughing, Steve opens his eyes, laughs once, and closes them again.

“No. You have to take those off, those are just…”

“Amazing,” he says, sitting back and resting his hands on Steve’s chest. “They’re like a sweater for my dick. It’s so warm and toasty. Here, feel.”

“No,” Steve says, yanking his hand away from Bucky’s reaching fingers. “I will not.”

“You don’t want to pet his trunk? C’mon Steve. Pet his trunk.”

Steve barks out a little laugh and Bucky can’t help but laugh with him. “No. I don’t. Jeez, Bucky take those off.”

“Oh? Then it does do something for you?”

Steve shoves at him a little, not enough to unseat him but enough to make his point. “Ugh. What on earth is wrong with you?”

“A lot of things,” Bucky says, leaning down and bringing them face to face. Steve is still smiling when their lips meet and he threads his fingers into Bucky’s hair as he licks into his mouth. Bucky pulls back, but hovers over him so their faces are only a few inches apart. “So what happens if I take them off?”

“Anything. I will do anything you want if you promise I never have to see them on you again.”

Bucky sits upright, puts his right hand over his heart and holds his left hand up. “I solemnly swear you will never see these knitted elephant trunk briefs on me ever again.”

Steve’s hands, which were sliding up the sides of his thighs stop and Steve’s smile – small and fond and very amused – fades away. Bucky bites at the corner of his lip and drops his hands back down to Steve’s chest. Steve’s face screws up in a very pinched, very pained way and Bucky laughs just a little because he can’t help himself.

“Aww, no. Don’t tell me…”

“Fine. I won’t tell you.”

He leans down, kisses from Steve’s jaw over to the corner of his mouth. Steve’s fingers brush along the edge of the shorts and he snorts, shaking his head and forcing Bucky to pull back a bit.

“Why did you even buy these things?”

And Steve, sweet, serious, weight-of-the-world-on-his-shoulders Steve Rogers is looking back at him, eyes dancing, the remnants of a smile still tugging at the corner of his lips, and just for a moment he looks like he doesn’t have a care in the world. Bucky shrugs. “You laughed.”

Bucky manages not to look away when Steve’s eyes go all soft at him. He leans forward just as Steve is reaching to pull him down, and their lips meet. He kisses Steve slow and thorough, and Steve hums into the kiss, one hand coming up to cup Bucky’s jaw, the other sliding up and around to rest on his butt. Steve breaks the kiss and jerks away.

“They have a tail?!”