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Never Again

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Professor Maka Evans had to be the strictest teacher at DWMA. Her unforgiving (and moderately violent) style of teaching was well known throughout the academy. Every student was forced to actually pay attention in her classes, under threat of being hit by one of her many textbooks. But, she was also one of the few teachers who were not often at the school. Maka spent much of her time on missions with her deathscythe-partner and husband, Soul Eater Evans. So, it was no great surprise when the students of 4M came to class one Tuesday morning to see a note written on the board, saying that she wouldn't be there.

It was however, a great surprise when their supply teacher came in an hour late, with his arms wrapped in bandages. Class 4M gasped as they took in his shock-white hair that stuck up everywhere and wine red eyes. Oh my Death, it was HIM, they realized. The man came to sit on top of Maka's oak desk, he leaned forward, resting his hands on his jean clad knees.

"Hi, I'm Soul. The coolest guy you will ever meet," he said with a crooked grin. So THIS was their teacher's infamous husband. He didn't seem much like her at all.


"Come on, ten more laps with do you good!" Never mind, he was just as psychotic as his wife.

"But Mr. Soul, this is torture!"

"So? You wanna become deathscythes and top class meisters? Work for it!" Soul honestly had no sympathy for the class and he was easily running alongside the class, despite the fact he was nearly forty. Weaklings, he scoffed. The poor students couldn't understand how he could keep pace with them and not break a sweat, even their best athlete, Koben, was out of breath.

"It's true," whispered some of the students, in between gasps of air.

"The old students really were monsters!"

Upon hearing that, a faint laugh escaped Soul, "Hey, if you guys finish quick, I'll teach you cheats for COD."

The students decided right then and there that they definitely preferred Mrs. Evans' textbook throwing tendencies to her husband's sadism. But they still picked up the pace and started sprinting just to keep up with their supply teacher, who had left them in the dust. As they raced towards him, it slowly dawned upon each student that Soul Eater Evans was clinically insane.


The next four periods after the run were spent with Soul teaching them how to play every video game known to man. If you could consider gleefully murdering the children's videogame characters 'teaching', that is. The guy was in no way normal, he acted like a teenager for one (and looked like one too, many of the girls noted appreciatively) and was freakishly sadistic for another, shouting in delight as he defeated each student in turn.

The students gained a new respect for Maka and her two children, realizing that they lived with this crackpot. No wonder the Evans kids, Sasha and Yuuki, were so... hyper all the time. The second that they were dismissed, class 4M raced to the doors, screaming 'Freedom' and 'Thank Death it over!'. Soul watched them go shaking his head sadly, Poor, video-game deprived children, to him the lack of love for his precious video games was blasphemy... He would need to supply again and show them Assassin's Creed, maybe they would like it better, Black*Star's kid certainly enjoyed it.

"Well," he muttered, packing his bag, "I'd better go tell Kim that there wasn't a zombie attack after all."


The next day Maka walked into her class to have her students handing her bouquets of flowers and chocolates.

"Please," they cried, desperation in their eyes (someone had even painted a mural of her face on the wall). "Never let your husband fill in for you ever again."

"Soul? But Kim was supposed to be your teacher."