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Fight Me, Bite Me

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Natsu twisted in his sleep, moaning, flinching, struggling against some invisible monster that haunted his dreams. Sweat glistened on his tense brow, and occasional fiery flickers lit the night as he fought a nightmarish demon. His nocturnal terrors woke Happy, who rubbed his massive eyes and walked over to the bed. In the darkness, he saw Natsu twitching, his breathing fast, his body stiff as it pulled against some horrific fantasy.

Before the Exceed could rouse him—and Happy had learned in the past that waking a sleeping Dragon Slayer was a dangerous thing to do—Natsu bolted upright with a scream. His eyes bulged, and flames shot out his mouth, scorching the wall across from him. He was pale with fright as he stared into the darkness of his bedroom.

"Natsu!"

He jolted and looked down to those huge eyes of his best friend. "Happy? What…?" Natsu felt his throat, and then his wrists.

"It was another nightmare."

Slowly, Natsu's breathing calmed down. He swallowed hard, gulping the terror down his dry throat. Happy hopped up onto the bed and patted Natsu's leg comfortingly.

"Was it that dream again?"

"Yeah," he mumbled, ashamed that he, of all people, would be plagued by nightmares. "I'm gonna go for a walk. I'll probably see you in the morning."

Happy watched silently as Natsu pulled on his clothes, wrapped his scarf around his neck, and held onto that scarf just a little longer, drawing some comfort from it. Natsu never spoke about his nightmare, but Happy knew that somehow the scarf was a comfort.

Natsu usually sneaked into Lucy's place when he felt like this. Her bed was comfortable, her smell soothed his mind, and it was usually the only way to fall back to sleep. So that was where he headed. When he turned onto Strawberry Street, he heard Lucy's shouts. That worried him, and he rushed forward. Fearing for her, Natsu leaped into the closed window, only to see something he never expected.

There was a man on top of Lucy. That horrified Natsu at first—surely he must be an attacker—until he saw the green Fairy Tail crest on the man's back. Then in the moonlight, he saw orange hair, and as if there might still be confusion, Lucy moaned his name.

"Oh God, Loke!"

The Lion's haunches tensed as they thrust against her, making her bed creak. "Order me, master. What more can I do to please you?"

"Touch … more."

With a lilting tease, Loke asked, "Touch where? Show me, Lucy. Point to where you want it."

Natsu moved away with flushed cheeks. Seeing those two made him aroused, but he still felt troubled by the nightmare. He thought about seeking out Lisanna—he used to snuggle in her bed after nightmares before Lucy arrived—but he figured he probably should not be around women while horny.

"Loke! Yes, there. Oh … oh God. I can't…"

Natsu ran away as the grunts and moans made him tingle. He needed a place to stay. Going back home led to more nightmares. He thought about just crashing in the guild's infirmary, but he really wanted someone to talk to. He shivered as the memory of the nightmare returned.

Who could he go see? Not a woman, not with how he felt after seeing Loke and Lucy. What man did he know well enough to seek out?

There was one, but he would be furious if Natsu woke him up. Then again, pissing off the popsicle was a good reason to go bug him.

Natsu raced through the dark streets to Gray's apartment and hopped up to the window, partly climbing some ivy to reach it. Looking in, he saw Gray's bed in the center of the room, away from the window. Natsu lifted the windowsill, and it slid up noiselessly. He slipped inside and rubbed his arms. Gray always kept his apartment icy cold. Natsu crept up to the bed and gazed down at the naked wizard. Gray was curled on his side, the sheets cocooned around him, his arms and knees curled up in a fetal position. Natsu had to smile. This was the only time that Gray looked so cute.

Natsu pulled the blankets aside just a little and slipped into the bed. The Dragon Slayer spooned against him, sidling up against Gray's chest and letting that iciness cool his back. Gray's breath tickled his neck. He smelled like a snowy forest, and Natsu decided that it was a reflective scent, something quiet and peaceful. His mind eased, and he felt the night terror fading.


Gray felt warm. He kicked off the covers, but still he felt hot. It annoyed him. Why would his bed be so warm? His eyes opened just a crack, and he saw a lumpy shadow in bed beside him.

Did he get drunk and pick up some chick at a bar? He did not recall drinking too much, but then again, he never recalled the details after a drunken party. He wondered who she was, if she was at least a little pretty, and if they actually had sex. He felt a slight nighttime arousal, so he guessed sex was not an issue. That was good. He hated using someone like that.

Gray reached forward and stroked the hair. It was soft, and in the dark he guessed it was either red, orange, or maybe an exotic pink. He wouldn't mind a pink-haired little sakura!

The sleepy moan was deeper than he expected, though. Gray's hand drew back fast. Only then did he notice the white muffler.

"What the hell!"

Gray leaped back, got wrapped up in his sheets, and tumbled out of bed onto the floor. Natsu rolled around and looked down at him.

"Oh, did I wake you?"

Gray pointed a shaking finger. "You! What … what are you doing in my bed? Oh God, don't tell me I got that drunk!"

"You're not drunk, or at least I don't smell any alcohol on you," Natsu said, stretching and yawning. "I wanted a place to sleep."

"Then go bother Lucy."

"She's busy."

"She's probably asleep, like any sane person would be."

"No, she's … busy. With Loke."

Gray blinked in surprise. "Her … and Loke?" He looked aside, stunned by the news. "Wow! I knew he's been after her skirt for ages, but I didn't think they were like that."

"Yeah, they definitely are," Natsu muttered.

"You saw?"

"Too much!" Natsu sat up in the bed and pulled his knees up.

Gray scrambled up and discarded the twisted sheets, exposing his fully naked self. "Don't tell me you had a crush on her, and now you're depressed, so you came here to sulk and annoy me."

"No, nothing like that. It's just … weird, seeing someone you know like that."

"I bet! So, what is the reason for you being here?"

Natsu gave a petulant shrug. "Bad dream."

"Bad dr-… Wait a moment! You had a nightmare, so now you need to sleep with someone?"

"Got a problem with that?"

"When I'm your security blanket, yeah! Why not Lisanna or Erza or … or some other lady who'd hold you through the night?"

"After seeing Loke and Lucy, I couldn't go to a girl."

"Sheesh!" Gray exclaimed, running his hand through his hair. "So you're scared of the dark and horny now? Great! Just great!" Gray flopped back onto the bed and glared at Natsu. However, that pensive face was something he could not hate for long. Gray's lips twisted up. He hated to see any friend looking sad. "Do you need to talk about it?"

Natsu looked over in confusion. "About Lucy? It's not a big deal, really. I wasn't in love with her or anything."

"I mean the nightmare, idiot!"

Natsu looked away again. "Just something I dream about."

"Something bad? Was it something that happened to you?"

Natsu shivered and his brow tensed.

"Hey, it's fine if you can't say. Just stay here. Whatever." He sighed and stared around at the dark bedroom. "Do you need anything? Some warm milk?"

"I'm not a frigging kid!"

"I'm just asking. Sheesh! I've never calmed someone from a nightmare."

Natsu and Gray stayed quiet for a while, both staring into the dark night.

"Hey, Gray," Natsu finally muttered. "You thought I was a girl you picked up while drunk, right?"

"Something like that," Gray admitted.

"Have you done that before?"

"Gotten drunk?"

"Had sex?"

"Sure. Haven't you?" When Natsu did not answer, Gray understood. "Hey, we're still teens. You don't have to have sex this young. Lots of people wait until they're married."

"Yeah, but you have, and Lucy's at it now, and there are rumors about Erza and Jellal—"

"Never mention them to her. She hits hard!"

Natsu had to laugh at the idea of Gray getting hit for prying into Erza's business.

"So you feel left out, huh? Is there any girl you're interested in?"

"Not really," Natsu mumbled. "I thought about Lucy, but I found out she isn't that way."

"What way?"

Natsu choked a little and went pale. Gray heard him breathing quickly as he tried to think of an excuse.

"So what sort of girl do you fantasize about?" asked Gray.

Natsu squirmed a little. "Not so much girls, necessarily."

Gray jolted again. "You're into guys?"

"I wouldn't say that either. It doesn't matter if it's a guy or girl, although I guess it depends on the situation."

"Situation? What sort of weird fantasies do you have, anyway? I totally can't imagine you thinking about sex."

"Of course I do! I'm a guy! It's just…" Natsu shrank down into his muffler. "Maybe it's perverted."

"They're sexual fantasies. Of course they're perverted."

"Do you have any weird fantasies, stuff you know is probably impossible?"

"You mean like tentacles and identical triplets?"

"Eww, seriously?" Natsu cringed.

"No! I'm just saying as an example. Eww, no! Well, not tentacles, at least. Triplets would be fun."

"Then what about … you know … being restrained?"

"You mean tied up?"

Natsu gave a meek nod.

"Not my sort of thing, but it's pretty normal for masochists." It took Gray a moment for it to dawn on him. "Wait, you? You have sexual fantasies about being tied up?"

Natsu squirmed away to the edge of the bed. "It's stupid, isn't it?"

Gray gulped hard, and his hands began to sweat. "Tied up how? Ropes? Handcuffs?"

"I dunno. Each dream is different. Once, it was a dream that you restrained half my body in ice."

Gray choked out a cough. "Wait, you had an erotic fantasy about me?"

"Oh, come on! Don't tell me you've never had a fantasy about your teammates."

"Well…" Gray blushed, feeling decidedly uncomfortable with this conversation. "Sure, but … but sheesh, did you have to tell me?" Gray squirmed and pulled the covers over his naked legs and torso before Natsu noticed that he was getting aroused. "So, I restrained you in ice, huh?"

"In the dream, yeah. And I used to have dreams about Lucy and her whip, or Erza in that Seduction Armor she has, or—"

"So just about anyone?"

"Well, mostly they were just—you know—people you don't know, you can't really see them clearly, they're just … there."

"And they … they tie you up?"

"Or just restrain me somehow."

"And do what?"

Natsu paused for a very long, very awkward moment. "Stuff…" He twisted his hips as he felt himself hardening. That nightmare was long gone now with memories of erotic fantasies. "Not always sex. Sometimes they just tease me, you know. Or sometimes they make me do embarrassing things."

Gray gulped hard again and fisted up his hands to keep them from touching himself. "Like, what?"

"I'm not telling you that part!" Natsu frowned as he realized Gray was acting weird. "It's perverted, right? It's strange and not normal."

"Maybe," Gray whispered hoarsely. "But it's not that weird. Some people have fantasies about being submissive, and some … have dreams about being dominant over someone else."

"Yeah, but I've not met a girl like that. I thought Lucy was, what with that whip, but when I tried hinting around, she wasn't that way at all."

Gray felt heat coursing through his body. "Does it have to be a girl?"

"Nah, but no one would want me like that. Girls are always 'Oh Salamander, you're so strong, give me babies' and shit. They have no idea just how messed up I am inside, what I want … what I need."

Gray forced his breathing to be calmer. "Do you really want it?"

Natsu looked over quizzically. "It's just a weird fantasy."

"But…" Gray could hardly control himself. His eyes gleamed dangerously. "Do you want someone to tie you up, have their way with you, make you tremble and beg to stop while screaming for more? Do you really want that?"

Natsu shivered at the hesitant offer. "You … you do that stuff?"

Gray held back from answering as he spent a moment to fortify himself. "No, not with someone else. Not yet. Only light bondage. I've never met a girl who wanted to go as far as I wanted."

Natsu's heart raced as his mind swirled with fantasies. "How far is that?" he asked breathlessly.

Those icy blue eyes gazed up under dark brows. "So far that I'd make you scream to stop."

A small gasp shuddered out. Fire raced straight down to Natsu's groin.

"So far…" Gray leaned forward and caressed that burning hardness hidden in Natsu's boxers. "…I'd leave you begging for more, and then deny it, until you'd do anything—anything at all—just to feel me touch you again."

Two fast breaths shivered out before Natsu steeled himself. Those eyes were dangerous, and he craved them! "Gray, would you … do you want … to hurt me?" He sounded uncertain about that.

"It doesn't have to hurt. I could do things to you…" Gray said in a sinfully sweet threat, "…that would feel very good, although you'd think it'd hurt. Or if you want, I could really hurt you. But if that's too much, I can just restrain you and fuck you senseless."

Natsu blushed at how bluntly he put it. "I think … I'd want … at least a little. Yeah. A little bit."

Gray eyed him up and down, lightly licking his lips. "Damn!" He shook his head and looked away. "This is crazy. I've gotta be dreaming. You're the last man on Earthland I'd thought would be a submissive masochist. Or are you just teasing me? Don't you dare tease me about this, Natsu. Anything else, you can fight me over, but not this."

"No, I … I didn't know that … you…" Natsu blinked and shook his head. His heart was racing so fast, it was making his head light and his ears ring. "You're not pulling my leg, right? I'll burn your whole apartment down if you are."

"I wouldn't tease about this. I never would have said anything at all, but you sound serious, and I've never met someone who might actually let me do what I've always wanted."

Natsu's breath caught at that. "What—?" His voice cracked at the unendurable sexual strain. "What would you do to me?"

Gray had a devilish grin. "Ideally? Anything I want. Anything that pleases me and pleasures you." Gray glanced down at the flame-print boxers. "You're excited just hearing about it. You're getting all wet down here." He fingered a moist spot on the boxers. "If we do this, there are a few rules."

Natsu quirked his head to the side. "Rules?"

"Number one: I'm an exclusive person. If you're with me, you don't do anything sexual with anyone else."

Natsu shrugged. "Yeah, of course." That seemed a given to him.

"Number two: you don't tell anyone about this. You can say whatever you want about us, tell people we're dating, or not and just keep it a secret. That doesn't matter to me. But not a word about anything kinky we do together. We do this only here, in this room, or in another room we agree upon. I'm not gonna act kinky in the middle of the guild or in some random alleyway."

"Oh, hell no!"

"Number three: we'll need safewords. If something I do is something you're not ready to try, and you want me to back off, say the word avalanche. If something I do is truly too much for you to withstand, say the word inferno."

Natsu looked confused. "Can't I say stop and no?"

Gray grinned fiendishly. "You'll be yelling at me to stop a lot, and you might yell no as an instinctive reaction without really meaning it. I can't let what you yell confuse me. Avalanche if you're not ready to go that far, but you're willing to try more of something else; Inferno, and I stop everything."

Natsu's breathing was getting deeper at the thought of it. This sounded far more than he had ever fantasied about … so deliciously more! "How far would you be willing to take it?"

"As far as you want to go, and I mean so much more than just sex."

Natsu tensed up at the sensual threat.

"Is there anything I absolutely can't do, anything you hate or that terrifies you?"

Natsu wondered what he was referring to. "What do you mean?"

"Oh, you're a virgin," Gray realized. "Well, is there any place I can't touch? Or any way I can't touch you? Can I touch your chest? Your nipples?" His fingers brushed over the stiffening nubs. "You obviously don't mind me touching your cock."

"I'm … I think I'm fine with anything like that."

"And inside?"

Natsu flushed heavily. "Yeah, that's fine."

"Can I hit you?"

Now Natsu looked suspicious. "How?"

"Can I spank you?"

Natsu lost his breath. He was dizzy again. "Y-yeah, that's … I think it's okay. I've never done it for real, but … but I think I'd like that."

"Can I use other things to hit you? Like a whip or a paddle?"

"I don't really know."

"Okay, we'll wait on that. Maybe later."

"There's one thing," Natsu said softly. "That nightmare I had … don't … don't choke me. Don't make it so I can't breathe."

Gray frowned at the fear in Natsu's eyes, but he knew not to push Natsu into talking about it. "That's good to know. Okay, no suffocation. What about blindfolding?"

"Yeah, that seems fine. Are you gonna have to make a checklist?"

"That would be ideal, but not tonight. You need to work off some issues, and now you've got me insanely aroused. We'll keep it light today. Maybe more later."

"And can you do one thing? Not at first, but … later on."

"A request, huh?" Gray looked amused, wondering what the naïve little virgin might want.

Natsu squirmed a little before getting the courage to say it. "When I'm built up, when I'm about to … to come…" Those narrow green eyes glanced up with feral passion. "Bite me!"

An eyebrow lifted in surprise. "Bite you?"

Natsu nodded fervently. "Neck, shoulder, doesn't matter, just … bite me. Hard. Try to break the skin, if you can."

"So, I can leave marks on you?"

"Lots of them!" Natsu breathed heavily.

"And it's okay if I make you bleed?"

"Well, not a lot, but … just at that point." He gave a meek shrug. "It's a Dragon Slayer thing. I want you to mark me. Bite hard and then lick the blood. I might want to do the same to you."

Now it was Gray's turn to be stunned. "That's a lot more than I imagined."

Natsu felt a little disappointment. "Is it something you don't want?"

"No, not that, it's just … I always figured not to leave anything permanent, but if that's what you want—"

"Yes!" Natsu answered quickly and eagerly.

Gray nodded, taking all this into his plans. When he felt ready, he leaned over into Natsu's ear.

"I'm gonna tie you up," he said in a sizzling simper.

Natsu's body tensed at the threat.

"I'm gonna bind your wrists in ice, restrain you to the bed, and then"—Gray leaned even closer—"I'm gonna ravage you!"

A whimper slipped out.

"Take off your clothes," Gray ordered, and he grinned mischievously. "I'll give you what you need."

With shaking muscles, Natsu rose from the bed and slowly stripped. Gray reclined, propping his head on a hand as he gazed upon the toned muscles with approval.

Ice did not caress. It bound! It froze things in place so they could not move.

Gray always wanted to bind a person with his ice. Not some random enemy, but a lover. The girls he had dated hated the pain of the ice against their skin. He had to resort to some kinky fuzzy handcuffs he bought at an adult store. Three girls let him try that, but without sex. Just handcuffing and teasing. Gray craved more! And he had a feeling that the only person who would—or could—let him do all he wanted was someone used to pain, someone who could handle his ice, someone who trusted him explicitly … someone like Natsu.

Years of fighting together assured him that even if he trapped half of Natsu's body in ice, the Dragon Slayer could handle it. He would brave the pain, and hopefully Gray could cull out pleasure from within that agony.

"The muffler too," Gray ordered.

Natsu choked up. Without his muffler, the nightmare from earlier threatened to rear up again. However, he knew Gray was there. He trusted Gray. Gray would not allow the demons of his dreams to hurt him. Only Gray would hurt him, and he knew it was a pain that would not agonize him too much. Gray's ice, his touches, anything he did: that was pain Natsu knew he could bear. With that implicit trust in his rival and teammate, Natsu unwrapped the white scarf and set it aside.

Finally, Natsu was naked and standing with a hard-on to be proud of. Gray licked his lips as he thought of all the things he could do with this body. Most of that had to wait. Natsu was a virgin. He had cravings and desires, kinky fantasies and wet dreams, but no actual experience. Push him too hard or hurt him too badly, and he would flee.

"Sit," Gray ordered, patting the bed. Natsu immediately obeyed, and Gray shifted over. "Lie on the pillow." Natsu scooted down over the sheets. "Hands together, like you're praying to God."

Natsu prayed Gray would really do this, and this whole thing wasn't some elaborate prank to humiliate him.

Roughly, Gray forced Natsu's hands back against the headboard of his bed and formed ice to hold them in place. Natsu hissed at the cold handcuffs, but the frigid pain only highlighted the intensifying desire building inside him.

"Yes…" Natsu whispered. "Make it strong. I wanna fight it."

Gray quirked an eyebrow. "Fight it?"

Natsu nodded with his eyes closed with anticipation. "I wanna struggle against it, be bound, that feeling of helplessness. You've felt it in fights, right? Some overpowering enemy, you know you can't win, you can't escape, and victory is impossible. Suddenly, all your nerves become alive. You feel and hear and smell everything."

"Strong it is, then!" Gray added an extra layer of ice, completely encasing Natsu's wrists and forearms, leaving only his hands to clench and claw at the headboard. "Now, what to do with you?"

The way he said it was enticing alone. Gray stood up, dominating over Natsu's prone body, and eyed him like a toy he wanted to play with. He tapped his chin, exaggerating his pondering.

"I could always start with this." Gray held up his hand, and with a brief spark of blue magic, an ice cube was in his fingers. "I always thought this hot body of yours could use some cooling off."

Gray began with the ice cube on Natsu's lips, rubbing around like he had seen Lucy draw on her lipstick. Natsu flinched away from the cold. The ice cube traced over his forehead, cooling his worries. Then it went down to the neck, trailing down his Adam's apple and across the ragged scar. The cube slipped wetly down his chest, lazily wandering over his skin, until Gray circled it around the nipples.

"Gaaah!" Natsu shouted, and he yanked at the restraints.

"That's a sexy sound," Gray purred in pleasure. "You have no idea how thrilling this is, seeing you bound up, under my control, mine to do with as I please. My own little flaming bitch."

Purely as a fighting instinct, Natsu yanked hard on the icy bonds. "You droopy-eyed bastard!"

However, Gray had made sure the ice was thick enough and imbued with a magic so it would not break completely. It cracked, but it did not shatter apart. Gray knew that, had the Dragon Slayer truly wanted to break loose, he could have flamed that ice into steam, or even broken apart the whole headboard to get loose. The fact that Natsu only pulled a little was encouraging.

Natsu felt that ice, so cold it burned, rubbing over his sensitive chest, around the pink dots stiffening with pleasure and pain. He yanked on the ice restraining his wrists until he felt an ache in his shoulders. He was trapped, helpless … well, not truly, but it was nice to give up control once in a while, stop being the person who always came to the rescue, and instead be at someone else's mercy. It felt thrilling to be the one trapped and needing to be rescued.

Subconsciously, he could not give up his control over his body on his own. He knew this from his own touches. Reaching that blissful peak meant surrendering to his own lust, and he simply … couldn't! It had to be forced, taken, stolen. That was what happened only in dreams. He needed to be tied up. He needed someone to force him to do what he did not want—what he desperately wanted—what he craved and feared. He feared the inner dragon, how it could possibly hurt someone. He feared his own lust. He needed to be restrained, or else who knew how he might lash out against his lover-victim.

He needed this!

Gray continued to slip the ice cube over Natsu's body, drawing a line straight down the taut muscles. His tongue followed, licking a hot stream that supplanted the cold. He circled the cube around the belly button, making sure some water melted within, and then further down.

"Don't you dare!" Natsu growled.

"On your dick, you mean? No. That might make you lose this delicious arousal."

Gray leaned over and licked from root to tip of the stiff member. That hot tongue, after so much cold ice, made Natsu's hips thrust up, seeking more of Gray's mouth. Instead, Gray backed away, and Natsu growled in frustration.

"No, I had something else in mind."

With speedy fingers, before the Dragon Slayer could figure out what he had planned, Gray slipped the ice cube up into Natsu's ass. The melty wetness, smoothed down into a bullet shape by Gray's cunning rubbing, fit perfectly inside, no resistance at all. Natsu jerked upward and yanked on the restraints so hard, he heard the wrought iron bars of the headboard creak.

"I want to challenge you, Natsu."

That caught the Dragon Slayer's attention. A challenge, eh?

"How many ice cubes can you hold inside your ass? If you can hold ten, I'll give you a special reward."

Natsu's breath was ragged from the icy pain inside, but as his body melted the cube, he figured he could tolerate this sort of teasing. "Bring it on, ice princess!"

Gray chuckled softly. Still so defiant! He would punish Natsu … later. He formed another cube in his hand, also shaping it into something like a bullet to fit inside easily. This time, he rubbed it around the puckered star. Natsu's eyes went huge, and he cried out at the coldness against the hottest part of his body. Then Gray pressed the ice cube inside.

"One."

"That's two!" Natsu argued.

"There was hardly anything left of the first one. It doesn't count. One." Gray formed another ice cube, but instead of playing, he slipped it right inside. "Two."

Natsu flinched. Inside him, he felt the chill. As one ice cube bumped into another, it pushed the first one higher up within. He could feel the ice in there.

"Three," Gray said in a seductive whisper.

The third pushed the other two even further up inside, and Natsu's spine arched. His teeth clenched to keep from screaming at the icy pain wracking the inside of his colon.

Slowly, sadistically, Gray pressed another inside. "Four."

Now the ice hit his prostrate, and any attempts at holding back were lost. Natsu screamed.

"What are the safewords, Natsu?" Gray asked sternly.

Natsu's brain could hardly think. Ice was inside him, melting, floating, rubbing nerves deep within.

"Avalanche and inferno! You need to know this."

"Too hard to remember," Natsu shouted in sensual desperation.

"Fine. Well, I can't use cold and hot, since this is ice play, but … okay, yellow and red, like a street light. Yellow means slow down but you can handle more, you just need it slower. Red, it all stops, everything."

"Yellow, red, fine," Natsu yelled.

"You'll need to say yellow if it's truly too much for you. I don't know your limits."

Limits? Natsu did not even know his own limits! He had never done something like this before. He had never even dreamed of Gray using his ice like this.

He must have been numbed, because he hardly felt the next cube enter. "Five."

"I'm good," Natsu shouted, although his whole body was cringing. "More!"

"Damn," Gray hissed. This was getting almost too erotic for him. Women had let him enjoy his little ice play before, but most shouted to stop after three. Gray focused again and made another cube in his fingers. He thrust it up fast. "Six!"

Natsu screamed, and Gray's heart felt ready to explode, let alone the burning desire in his groin. To have this much control over someone, to force this much of his ice—a part of himself—inside, was beyond just kinky. It was intoxicating.

When Gray slipped the next cube in—"Seven!"—Natsu felt all those other cubes shift and squeeze together inside his body. His innards were quivering with cold pleasure. It hurt … horribly! Wonderfully! But then, an ice cube shifted wrong and wedged right against his prostrate.

"Yellow! Yellow!" Natsu shrieked. "Shit!" He swung his hips, trying to move the cube inside him to get that ice off such a sensitive zone.

Two hands rubbed over his body. They were cold, but nowhere near as chilly as the freezing liquid pooling in his ass. Gray suddenly leaned over, and much to Natsu's surprise, those chapped lips pressed against his in an uncharacteristically tender kiss. Natsu's eyes widened, but then slowly drifted down, enjoying the sweetness of this first kiss between them. Then Gray rose up, hovering over Natsu's body, and gazed down at him with lowered eyes sparkling with lust.

"We can stop," he assured gently.

"No, I just needed to wait. I'm good."

"Don't be stubborn."

"I won't be. I'll tell you if it's really too much."

Gray looked hesitant, but then again, Natsu had used a mild safeword. He at least knew the limits of his own body. Of course, he was also a stubborn flame-brain who would push those limits.

And Gray wanted to push them!

Slower this time, Gray pressed in the next cube. "Eight," he breathed, as if he had to listen for any discomfort from his partner. Natsu moaned a little, and his body flinched, but he seemed comfortable with that. Another cube. "Nine. Damn, Natsu, you're almost there."

"Quick," Natsu warned. "Make it quick."

Gray complied and slammed the last one in. "Ten. Wow! I can't believe you did it."

Natsu looked a little paler than when they started off, and he was oddly quiet. "Gray, they're … melting. Inside. It … it needs to drip out."

"I know," he said, wondering how he could express how immensely proud he was that Natsu managed to fulfill this longtime fantasy of his. "This is where shit gets kinky."

Natsu peeped an eye open. Wasn't this kinky enough? He had frigging ice up his ass!

"Can you stand?"

Natsu wondered if he could even move. He felt the ice restraint dissolve, and he slowly shifted. As he did, the ice in his colon moved, and he could feel some pieces floating up, while the liquid moved down.

"Gaaah!" Natsu yelled. The ice … inside him … moving, shifting. The warmer water further in got cold anew as the fresh ice cubes floated up.

Two arms grabbed him and lifted him. Natsu was stunned to feel Gray carry him—and fucking princess style at that—to the bathroom. However, he walked past the toilet and to the bathtub. He set Natsu down on his feet, and with a stern face, Gray yanked Natsu's arms up to the shower head. He used the pipe to freeze Natsu's hands above his head once again.

"The hell is this?" Natsu shouted. He felt cold liquid already seeping out his ass and dripping down his inner thigh. "Gray, seriously, I need to let this out."

Gray stood back with a cruel smile. "Then do it. Right here. You're in the tub, so it's fine."

"Hell no!" Natsu shouted. "With you watching? That's humiliating."

Gray leaned right up into Natsu's face. "I know."

The way he said it, with those cruel blue eyes, so cold and calloused, made Natsu's knees weaken. "Gray," he whimpered. He felt a little bit more leak out, and the cold stream was a horrific indicator of just how much trouble he was in.

"I want to watch," Gray purred. "Natsu, my ice is inside your ass. You're about to shoot my ice out of your body. Can you even imagine how erotic that is for me? When you come, that'll be your own liquid, but this … this is my liquid, my own. And it's inside of you, trying to escape. I want to watch."

"But…" Natsu whimpered as another drop slipped out. "It … it could be … you know, messy."

Gray gave him a sadistically evil grin. "I hope it is!"

Natsu gulped hard. He almost wanted to use a safeword on this, but … Gray looked really riled up by the thought of seeing this, of humiliating him this deeply. Natsu wanted to please Gray. For letting his fantasy come true, he could do at least this much in return.

Natsu's body shivered. The pressure in his ass was hurting, but natural instincts were to hold on, clench tight, and not release, not here, not in a bathtub, and not standing up. His thighs squeezed tighter together.

"Nu-uh," Gray warned. He forced Natsu's knees apart and used ice to trap his ankles on either side of the tub. "There. I can really see now."

"No…" Natsu sobbed.

"There's no yellow on this, Natsu. You do it, or you go red."

Red. Red and it all stopped. Natsu did not want this to stop. Even the humiliation was thrilling in a sick way. He had wanted to lose control. Now, he did not even have control over his own body's functions.

He felt more cold liquid leak out. He clenched up instinctively, but he felt Gray's hand rub his back.

"Let it go, Natsu. I'm here. I'm not going to make fun of you or hurt you. I'm going to pleasure you, humiliate you, make you hurt, and make you happy. So just let go. Trust me."

Trust him? He did trust Gray, with his life! So why not with his pride as well.

Natsu gulped, and slowly he relaxed. He felt the liquid again, trickling out of his ass and down both thighs. He sniffled; he knew he could back out, but … he didn't want to! It felt … good. To let go. To be ashamed. To feel tiny and disgusting. It felt oddly good.

An ice cube popped out along with the water, and Natsu cried out, sobbing now. Gray's arms were instantly around him.

"You are so sexy, Natsu. So insanely erotic. That's my ice coming out of you. Mine! My ice and my water. Inside you. Leaking out of you." Natsu felt Gray shudder with intense lust. "You have no fucking idea how erotic this is!"

Another mostly-melted ice cube popped out and dropped with a shatter to the bathtub. Natsu shivering another cry.

"Shit…" Gray suddenly released the ice restraints. "Toilet. Squirt it all out, Natsu. Fast."

"Huh?" Natsu felt too dizzy to realize he was free.

"I need you. Now! Shit them out or they're getting rammed in with my cock."

Gray left the bathroom, and Natsu gladly raced to the toilet, where the last of the ice came out along with the water in his ass. He barely had time to wipe before Gray returned, ripping a condom open with his teeth.

"Do you want it?"

"It? Oh!" Sex? He meant sex, right? Sex with Gray! "Um, yes?"

"Good. Bed or bath, your pick."

Natsu realized playtime was over. "I'm still a mess."

"Bath it is."

Gray grabbed Natsu harshly and practically threw him into the bathtub again. Natsu just barely stopped himself from a face-first collision.

"Hey, bastard…"

"Shut the hell up," Gray growled. "Spread your legs. Now!"

Natsu saw him roll the condom onto his leaking cock. Being tossed around, manhandled, and ordered around … it made his heart race with salacious desires. So weirdly arousing! Then Gray took the shower head, detached it from its holder, and turned the water on hot.

"Turn around. I'll clean your ass."

Natsu did, and Gray changed a setting on the shower head to a high pressure pulse. Water jetted out and onto Natsu's rump. That hot water, after all the cold ice, burned his skin like no fire ever could. He shouted again, and then Gray's body pressed up against his.

"How are you this damn erotic, Natsu?" he whispered. "You're never like this in the guild. How are you so fucking hot?"

The shower head hit his ass again, like a fire hose against flames, and Natsu tensed up with a cry.

"So … fucking … hot," Gray repeated slower, growling insanely. "Just warning you, this is going to hurt."

"Make it burn," Natsu challenged.

Gray smirked. Still feisty, after all that?

He twisted the shower head until the water came out as a light drizzle and returned it to the clamp that held it up near the water pipe. It rained down on the two, a warm wetness that tickled Gray's body. Their hair, stiff from sweat, plastered down as rivulets of water streamed over Natsu's bronzed body.

"You're probably not prepped as good as you should be, but I can't wait," Gray warned. "Spread your legs more."

Natsu did, and he felt that stiff hardness press against the crack of his ass.

"No, wait," Natsu warned. "My hands. I … I need to be restrained."

Gray looked confused. "Even for this?"

"Especially for this," he whispered. "I can't lose control. You have to take it. You have to force it out of me."

Gray groaned at what he was asking. "Force it, huh? If that's what you need."

He grabbed Natsu's wrists with an iron grip and slammed him painfully against the tiles of the bathroom wall. The bathtub was right next to a window, and standing like this, Natsu could look out into the night. It was too dark to see much, but there was a street lamp that lighted a small orange circle of sidewalk.

"If someone comes by, they can see your face," Gray said in a low, dangerous tone. "I wonder what sort of face you'll show."

"Exhibitionist!" Natsu snarled.

"Damn right I am!"

Then suddenly, Natsu felt Gray enter him. It was hot, scorching compared to the ice that had been in him just a minute ago. Natsu cried out as that massive cock pierced into him. It hurt! It burned! It felt so … damn … good!

Gray did not wait, and he did not go gently, despite knowing it was Natsu's first time. He rammed in hard, stretching him, forcing his way in. The shower water and the lingering cold moistness within was all the lube he had. Gray did not stop. He pulled back, and then slid in deeper. Natsu cried out in what was surely terrible agony, but Gray no longer listened to the shouts. Only one word mattered.

Natsu had better not say red. Not now. Gray was unsure if he could stop.

His hips tensed as he thrust in, pinning Natsu's chest to the tile wall, his hands trapped above his head, and Gray listened with rapture as that sexy roar echoed through the bathroom. If there truly had been anyone on the street below, they would have heard the sound of a man losing his virginity.

And it was delicious!

Natsu pulled. No ice restraints this time. It was only Gray's hand, but his fingers crunched into Natsu's wrists. There would be nasty bruises come morning.

The thought of those bruises, those little badges of their lust, made Natsu quiver inside.

"So … hot," Gray snarled as he pounded in.

"Gray, touch me," Natsu moaned. The cold tile that pressed against his cock was annoying and did not give him the friction he needed.

"No," Gray growled.

"Please!" Natsu screamed.

"No, I'm … coming!"

Natsu shouted in protest. No! He was not anywhere near close. Yet he felt Gray's haunches stiffen, his cock rammed in hard, and hot—so hot—fluid filled that latex condom, expanding it. That heat was like a relieving balm to a sore pain. Natsu shivered as heat was allowed back inside his body. He felt Gray's head rest against his shoulder, and cold puffs of air frosted his back.

He was still horny. Hellishly horny! "Gray?" Natsu whined.

"I know," Gray assured him. "That was greedy, but I needed it, and I'm not done playing with you."

Natsu felt a thrilling spike through his nerves. Not done?

Gray pulled out. Blood now dripped down Natsu's thigh, only to be washed away by the shower. Gray grabbed a washcloth and, being as gentle as possible, he washed Natsu clean. Then Gray turned off the shower. They were both dripping wet, and Natsu saw no towels around.

"Go back to the bed," Gray ordered.

Natsu looked at his body covered with pearls of water. "Like this? Wet?"

"Yes." Gray eyed that toned body, and his gaze lingered on the aching erection. "Like this. Don't worry about it. It's not like you get cold."

He had a point.

Natsu padded back to the other room and lay down. Gray took a moment longer, needing to dispose of the condom first. When he walked back in, Natsu's breath caught. Gray looked devilishly sexy, with his wet hair hanging in his face, that sculpted body, the scars of battles, and the swagger in his steps. And his smell! Natsu knew Gray's smell well, like mint and pine trees and snow. Now, there was a deeper scent to his aroma. Gray smelled of…

Cinnamon? Campfire?

He smells like me! The thought pleased Natsu, but it also brought up the wild, animalistic, territorial side of him. He is mine!

Natsu shook his head. He hated that side of him, a deep inner personality that wanted to dominate, destroy, claim, ravage, fuck…

"Gray," he whispered. "Restrain me again."

Gray saw in those lowered eyes, this was more than just a kink. For Natsu, this was a necessity if he wanted a sexual encounter.

"Hands up," he ordered, and Natsu quickly complied. "Now, legs up. Hold your ankles."

Natsu was confused by this. Instead of being above his head, he had to reach down to get his ankles. Luckily, his years of missions and fighting left the Dragon Slayer shockingly flexible. He grabbed his ankles, and immediately Gray grabbed Natsu's feet. With a light blue glow, Gray formed bondage that not only trapped the wrists, but the feet as well.

"There." Gray smiled with immense pleasure. "You're helpless now."

Natsu shivered and let out a soft moan as he realized Gray was right. No arms, no legs, folded over himself, trapped…

Gray pushed Natsu's hips, rolling him upward, until Natsu rested on his shoulders. Then Gray bent down on the bed, spread Natsu's butt cheeks apart, and examined the tiny opening. "Nice and clean now. The only thing that's been in there is my ice and my cock. Mine!" He leaned over and kissed the tiny hole. There was still some blood, and Gray wiped it aside. "I hurt you earlier. Sorry about that. I promised you a reward if you got all ten ice cubes inside. So here it is."

Gray laid two kisses on each of Natsu's butt cheeks. Then he licked right over the bruised and sore hole. The Dragon Slayer flinched and squirmed at the moist, warm feeling.

"Whoa, wait … what?" he shouted. Gray is licking me … down there. He's kissing my asshole.

Natsu could hardly help but laugh loudly. "Oh my God, you're actually kissing my ass!"

Gray glared through the space between Natsu's legs, where his head was still on the pillows, although the rest of his body was contorted. "Do you think that's funny, bastard?"

Suddenly, Gray slapped Natsu's butt. The raucous laughter stopped sharply, and Natsu's eyes widened.

"Holy … damn," Natsu whispered.

Gray watched the reaction with puzzlement. This was something else he wanted to try, but he had figured to leave spanking and—oh, how sinfully scrumptious—maybe even whipping and paddling until a later time, after Natsu had a chance to consider the world of pain and pleasure Gray could offer him. However, those huge eyes and the stunned expression mixed with a deepening flush all showed that Natsu enjoyed it, but his brain had not fully registered how a hit could feel good.

"I'm trying to give you a special present, yet you laugh at it. That's very rude. You should be scolded."

Gray drew his hand back dramatically and slapped Natsu's ass again.

"Yaaaaargh!" Natsu cried out in a strained gurgle. "Damn … Gray!"

"You've been disobedient," Gray said in a dire tone. He spanked Natsu again.

Something like a hiss and a snarl bubbled out of Natsu's throat. "More!" he screamed.

"Che! Why should I give you something you want?"

Instead of spanking him again, Gray pulled his pinkened—and now tender—butt cheeks apart and licked again. Natsu jolted almost out of the rolled position Gray had folded him into. Then Gray pressed his tongue in. It was nowhere near as filling and scorching as his whole cock, but that lapping tongue gliding in and out of Natsu's ass made him cry out with ecstasy. It was smooth, slippery, wet, and warm. Instead of pain at being ripped open, this was pure and utter pleasure.

"Gray." He whinnied like an animal in heat. "Touch me!"

Instead, Gray spanked him again. With his tongue inside, he felt Natsu clench tightly at that.

"Gray!" Natsu shrieked.

"Maybe I should spank you until you come," he teased.

"No … touch … please," Natsu begged breathlessly.

Gray kissed Natsu's sack softly. Finally, he reached around and gripped the thick shaft. "It's hot," he hissed as his hand stroked the full length.

"Bite … bite me," Natsu gasped. "Not the big bite at the end. Little bites."

"Like this?" Gray asked, and he leaned over to his chest and nipped on the perky pink nub.

Natsu let out a string of cries mixed with profanity. "Mmm … Make me!"

Gray glanced up in confusion while still holding the nipple in his teeth.

Natsu was sweaty and flushed. "Force me." His eyes cracked open and looked down. "I … I won't … want to come. Make me!"

Gray's eyes darkened. The restraints on Natsu's ankles cracked apart, and Natsu unrolled from the awkward position. Before he could moan in relief, Gray slammed Natsu's hands against the headboard and roughly forced those hot feet apart with his own cold legs. Natsu felt ice creeping over his skin. Slowly, from his feet and his raised arms, the ice crackled inward, covering ankles, wrists, knees, elbows, on to his thighs and shoulders. Ice covered half the bed, leaving Natsu partially encased. Only his hips, torso, neck, and head were free.

"You are completely mine, Natsu," Gray said in heavy tones. "This body…" He rubbed his hands up and down the chest and stomach, avoiding all sensitive areas. "…is under my control. Do you understand? I will make you come when I want you to come. I will deny it if I want, or I will force it." He leaned right into Natsu's ear, whispering his velvety threats. "I will ravage you, and rape you"—Natsu gasped heatedly at that—"and make you beg. Fight me, Natsu. Fight me all you want. Your body is mine, now."

He could see that his words, sweet as honey and dripping with poison, affected Natsu's body. Now, it was all about mental state. Natsu needed to think, on a subconscious level, that he was not in control, when in reality Gray had to watch carefully, judging every untold command. Right now, those eyes, like some feral creature, were daring Gray to keep the Dragon Slayer captive.

Gray reached down and stroked the stiff, hot cock. At the touch, Natsu's spine arched up.

"No!" Natsu yelled. "Stop!"

It was all psychological, and Gray had to remind himself of that. "I'm gonna make you come, Natsu."

"No!" he snarled, and Gray saw a flash in those narrow eyes.

"Whether you want it…" He grabbed Natsu's hair and yanked the pink strands up hard, snapping Natsu's head up. "…or not!" Gray licked from Natsu's Adam's apple up to his chin, over that, and to his lips.

Natsu yanked on the icy binds, and Gray watched with wry amusement. What a complex little dragon he snared! One minute he was begging for it, the next he was fighting against it. Gray released Natsu's pink hair roughly. Natsu surged at him, pulling forward, and his teeth snapped. Not even thinking, Gray slapped him across the face.

"You better enjoy this," he whispered darkly.

Then he slid down to the waiting cock. Natsu tried to shake his hips, but they were trapped. Gray smirked as he felt flames on Natsu's skin, yet his ice held. He had developed this particular type of ice to withstand Natsu's flames in their fights. It regenerated, so no matter how Natsu melted it, it froze again and became harder. There was no way Natsu could break free.

He wasted no time. Natsu had a need, and Gray desperately wanted to fulfill it. He took Natsu's cock into his mouth, sucking, swallowing, using his hand to rub the base, while his fingers occasionally stroked his balls.

"Stop!" Natsu yelled. "Oh God, yesssss!"

Needing release, yet not wanting to lose control: the two forces clashed in Natsu's mind as he felt that cold yet hot mouth pump him, that hard tongue stroking, those icy hands rubbing … all of it was Gray, and … forced! He had to let his mind think that. He wanted it, of course, but his body fought the release building inside.

Forced!

Raped!

Bound!

Humiliated!

Fight it!

Natsu roared out, and Gray's mouth pulled off.

"No!" Natsu gasped. So close … so very close…

"Didn't I tell you? I'll only let you come when I want it."

"Bastard!"

Natsu pulled more, but Gray's hand still held on to his dick. His body slipped up the bed and rested on top of that burning body.

"I believe there was a request." Gray sounded so arrogant, it pissed Natsu off … and turned him on!

Gray's hand was rough on Natsu's cock, yanking, squeezing, stroking long and fast. Natsu's hips bucked at the hand. He wanted more. He wanted harder. He wanted it to end. Now!

"Gray!" he screamed.

Suddenly, that cold head was against his neck, and Natsu felt teeth bite down into his skin. Being marked! Him! A Dragon Slayer! It was the ultimate form of humiliation, to be marked by another. Those teeth were not strong enough to break skin, though, and that was a small victory for Natsu because…

His teeth could!

With no warning, Natsu leaned into Gray's shoulder and chomped … hard! His canines pierced, and Gray's scream mixed with Natsu's snarl. Natsu sucked on the bite and lapped up the blood. He tasted the hormones of lust and sex in that blood. A delicious flavor! It drove him over the edge.

Need, greed, desire, passion: it all burst out in white ribbons of fluid.

Finally, Natsu released his bite, and Gray pulled back. Blood still streamed from the piercings, and Natsu licked his lips in satisfaction.

"Bastard! You didn't warn me about that part."

"I said I might want to. I didn't know if I'd do it or not." Natsu shrugged. "Never done this with a partner before. I only knew what I've always craved. That was pure instinct."

"Your instinct sucks!" Gray reached to his shoulder, but when he felt wetness, he pulled his fingers back up to see them shiny red. "Shit, I'm really bleeding."

"Release me," Natsu ordered. "I'll tend to it."

Gray let the ice go, and Natsu slowly moved his weary body. He turned Gray around to inspect the bite. Pride surged in him again. Gray had marked him, but he marked the Ice-Make wizard deeper. Natsu licked the streams of blood, and then licked over the punctured wounds.

"That's probably filled with bacteria," Gray grumbled.

"Shut up. It heals."

"Dragon Slayer saliva heals?"

"Only when we're like this. Igneel told me about it. Dragon saliva heals after sexual arousal so the dragons can tend any wounds given during the fight of coupling."

"Your dad taught you about dragon sex? Sheesh!"

"Igneel taught me lots of things." Natsu smiled fondly, lapping at Gray's skin. The wound had already begun to heal, but he liked the salty taste of Gray's skin. "I need to hold you now."

"Need it? I should clean you up. You have cum all over your chest."

"Lick it!" The tone in Natsu's voice left no room for argument.

"Che! And here I thought you were a perfect submissive." Gray did not argue, though. He licked Natsu's chest, cleaning away the sexual residue.

Natsu watched him eating up the cum, and warmth spread over him. A mate cleans up the mess, and the dragon protects the mate, cures any wounds, and stays with the mate until both recover. Maybe Igneel told him that too, or maybe these were instincts whispered into Natsu's brain. Whatever the case, Natsu stroked Gray's hair as he watched his mate clean him. Then Gray looked up, and he leaped on top of Natsu, forcing him down as his tongue thrust in.

That tongue! The tongue that licked his nipples, thrust into his ass, sucked his cock, and now it was bathed in Natsu's own cum. The Dragon Slayer moaned as that naughty, busy tongue shared all those tastes with him.

Natsu grabbed Gray and hugged him close. "Enough," he whispered tiredly. "I really need to hold you." Definitely, it was an instinct. To hold. To love. To protect his mate.

"You're a weird bastard," Gray muttered, yet he did not mind too much. Natsu's arms were a little too hot, but they were strong and comforting. Was it some pheromone Natsu was giving off that made Gray so immensely sleepy?

"Gray?"

"Hmm?"

"Can I sleep here?"

"Mm-hmm," Gray agreed.

"Good. Gonna sleep. And Gray?"

"Gmmm," he moaned in annoyance.

"…Thanks."

Gray smiled, and he nuzzled into that hot chest. In under a minute, both were asleep, wrapped in one another's arms.

 

End of Chapter 1

Blissful birdy fanart
FMBM Fanart by Blissful-birdy

Chapter Text

When Gray woke up, he spent a few minutes staring at the ceiling, feeling a huge drain on his whole body. He looked over at the alarm clock. Eleven in the morning. He was never one for waking up early, but this was sleeping in even for him. He felt like maybe he woke up in the night and—

A memory jolted him fully into wakefulness. Natsu! His whimpers, his growls, the cries that had echoed through this room: all of it returned to Gray's mind.

He looked over to the side of the bed, but no one was there. He felt the mattress, hoping it was still warm from the Fire Dragon Slayer's burning body, but nothing. He wished he had a nose like Natsu so he could smell if the pink-head had been there or not.

He rose off the tussled bed and shuffled into the bathroom, fully naked, although that was normal. He remembered Natsu hanging from his shower head with water dripping out of his ass. No, definitely something that erotic must have been a dream. But a dream about Natsu? Of all people!

Gray urinated and glanced down at his penis. Thrusting Natsu against the bathroom wall…

"Shit," Gray hissed as the yellow stream halted from arousal. He took a moment to calm his mind before he could finish peeing.

As he shook off the last drops, he recalled Natsu biting him. He should have a mark, a scab from where the Dragon Slayer's teeth sank in. Yes! That would be proof. However, when he looked in the mirror over the sink, there was only a very faint pinkness, more like a mosquito bite, rather than the puncture wounds he knew should be there.

"Was it really just a dream?" he muttered, rubbing the pink dots. They did not even hurt. "Must've been. Natsu as a masochist … that's impossible!"

He took a colder shower than usual, ate some cereal, dressed—he at least started off his day fully clothed—and made the long trek to the guild hall. He needed to clear his mind from those erotic dreams. A mission would do it. Or a strong drink. Or both.

Immediately upon entering, his eyes saw pink, and he glanced quickly over to Natsu sitting to the side, not on a stool by the bar, not leaping around challenging everyone to fight him, but in a booth eating some lunch.

Natsu glanced to the door, and their eyes met. Gray swallowed hard. He waited for a sign, a smile, a scowl … something. Anything! Instead, Natsu looked away with no expression, not even an insult like usual. He bit into his sandwich and chewed while looking over at a conversation between Lisanna and Elfman.

Gray shook his head. Must've been a dream!

He went in and ordered only a protein shake for breakfast-slash-lunch. Lucy was not there that day, so Erza decided they would hold off on accepting a request. Gray slurped the shake, but he had no one with whom to talk. Without Natsu to fight him or Lucy to keep him distracted, his only choices in entertainment was Juvia hiding behind a pillar and staring at him in her creepy-stalker way, or Cana, who only wanted a drinking match. Gray had nothing better to do, so he stupidly accepted.

Fifteen mugs of beer later—a new record for himself—Gray lost consciousness in a puddle of spilled beer and a mountain of empty glasses.


He came to for a moment and felt heat all around him. Two arms held him, and he leaned on someone's back. Somebody was carrying him.

"You're a real idiot," Natsu grumbled.

Gray felt the softness of the white muffler and nuzzled into it. "Did we do it last night?" he asked groggily.

He felt Natsu's muscles stiffen. He was unsure if Natsu heard him or not, or if he ever eventually gave an answer, because Gray passed out again.


When he woke up, he knew how Natsu felt while on a train. Barely conscious, Gray rushed to the bathroom and vomited into the toilet. Fifteen mugs of beer plus the protein shake he drank that morning all came back up.

"I had a bucket by your bed."

Still heaving, Gray recognized Natsu's voice coming from the bathroom entryway, but before he could answer or even look over to him, Gray retched again.

"I'll make some broth," Natsu offered, and he left Gray alone to clean up.

Finally, the heaves stopped, and Gray cleaned out his mouth. Natsu must have carried him home. Why him? Maybe Erza ordered him to drag Gray's pathetic, drunken ass back. That sounded likely. Still, there was a flash of a memory, himself carrying Natsu princess-style from the bed to this bathroom.

"Shit," he moaned. Damn erotic dream!

He walked into the main room and heard noise in the kitchen. He also noticed the home was hotter than he usually liked it. The idiot Fire Dragon Slayer had messed with the thermostat! He marched into the kitchen, ready to yell at him, until he saw Natsu by the stove wearing an apron. His mouth dropped a little at the sight. When Natsu turned around from the stove and grinned hugely, Gray could have leaped on the bastard right then and fucked him against the sink.

"Feeling better?" asked Natsu.

"Marginally," Gray grumbled, holding himself back by reminding himself that if he did anything strenuous—like grabbing Natsu around the hips, thrusting him up against the counter, dry-humping against the guy's groin until he hardened and moaned his name in a lusty whimper—Shut up! Just shut up!—anything like that would likely cause his stomach to lurch again.

"There's tea on the table."

Tea. Yes, drink tea. Tea was a good distraction and might settle his stomach too.

Gray muttered thanks and sat down to a cup of steaming green tea. He took a sip but immediately shouted and spit it out. Way too hot! He made a couple of ice cubes in his hand and dropped them in.

Ice cubes. Ice cubes in Natsu's ass…

Goddammit, shut up!

"Oh, is it hot? Sorry. I wasn't sure how hot you like your tea. I made it cooler than I usually take it."

"Idiot," Gray grumbled.

After a minute, Natsu brought over a bowl of chicken broth and a chunk of bread. "So, was Cana that convincing when she challenged you, are you that stupid, or was last night that bad?"

Gray choked on the tea and sputtered out a few drops. "Last … last night?"

Natsu blushed and looked away. "If it was bad, I can't help it. It was my first time, after all."

Gray's lungs shivered out all air in them. Then it did happen! Those visions, those scenes in his head, all the erotic fantasies … they were real!

"You … you weren't there when I woke up," Gray whispered.

"I woke up earlier. I stayed around for two hours. You were sound asleep. I didn't want to wake you. Then I realized Happy would be worried, so I left to go tell him I was okay. When I came back here, I heard you in the shower, so I went on to the guild."

"But you didn't say anything when I entered."

Natsu looked frustrated. "What was I supposed to say? 'Hey, Gray, good morning, thanks for fucking me last night.' Idiot, obviously I didn't say anything. I was waiting for you to come up to me, but instead you drank yourself comatose. What the hell am I supposed to think?" He looked away angrily. "If it was that … disgusting to you, you didn't have to do it with me."

Gray shook his head. "I … I thought … it was a dream, too good to be true. You weren't there in the morning, you didn't say anything, and there weren't even marks on my neck."

Natsu caressed the skin where he had bitten Gray. "I healed it. I would've rather had you showing off the bite I gave you, but you mentioned that you weren't too sure about leaving permanent marks, so I made sure it healed up completely."

"It's fine if there's a bruise. I just meant … I have enough scars, ya know," he said, touching the slash above his eyebrow. "I don't need to look like I got mauled by a dragon too."

Natsu loosened his scarf and pulled it away from his neck. When Gray looked over, he saw a huge purple mark where he had bitten Natsu.

"Can it look like this?"

Seeing his mark on Natsu's skin made a thrilling rush shiver over Gray's body. If Natsu's own words and his own vague memories were not enough to convince him, that mark on Natsu's neck was proof that last night really happened. He reached forward and gently rubbed the bruise.

His bruise! His love mark!

Natsu flinched, but even that looked arousing to Gray. Natsu must have been dealing with that lingering pain all day. Every twinge of ache would have been a reminder of their kinky coupling.

"Yes," Gray whispered. He leaned in to kiss the mark. "It can look exactly like this." He kissed again, and then worked kisses up Natsu's neck, lightly sucking on his skin.

The Dragon Slayer moaned softly and moved his head to the side, giving Gray better access. Those cold lips tingled and made Natsu's heart race with memories of the night before. After worrying that Gray had hated it, to feel his touch again was heavenly. Desires surged through his hot blood. He wanted more!

Gray pulled back to look into Natsu's face. Already, his cheeks were flushed and his mouth slightly opened as he panted fiery breaths. It looked so erotic.

He wanted to tie Natsu up. He wanted to chain him, watch him struggle, listen to him scream, while he delivered pain and pleasure all over his body. Gray licked his lips at the thought of it. Then he forced his eyes closed, and he backed away. He had to pace himself, after all.

Gray sat back in his chair and sipped some broth Natsu made. "How's your body?"

"Huh?" Natsu looked confused. Why had Gray stopped? He wanted more! Then Natsu realized that maybe he still felt ill.

"I was pretty rough on you, plus it was your first time. Are you okay? Does it hurt bad? Is it hard to move?"

"Oh," he realized, and Natsu blushed slightly. "I'm okay. Well, a bit sore when sitting, but it's bearable."

"That's good. I should give you a break for today."

Natsu squirmed a little. "You … don't have to," he said hesitantly. "We could do other stuff, right? Not just s- … sex."

Gray found swallowing the bread Natsu got him to be almost impossible. "Sure," he said, forcing his voice to sound neutral when in reality his throat was constricting in sexual tension. "Did you have anything in mind?"

Natsu looked stumped. "I … I don't really know."

Gray slurped some more broth. "Think about it while I eat. If there's something you want to try, just tell me."

Gray's mind raced with all the naughty, dirty, sexy things he could do to Natsu. The way the boy's cheeks turned pink, Natsu must also be thinking about some things. Gray wondered what turned Natsu on, besides his need to be tied up.

What was that about, anyway? It was not just a kink, not how Natsu had acted. Rather, it seemed to be a psychological necessity. Plus that whole thing about needing to feel like he was being raped…

Seriously, what was up with that?

"There is one thing," Natsu whispered bashfully.

Gray ate some more soup. If they were going to play, he needed energy. "Yeah? What?"

"You're right, I still hurt, so I was wondering … could we soak in the bathtub together?"

Way … too … cute! "Soaking, huh? Sure, we could do that."

Natsu's eyes lit up. He imagined him and Gray cuddled together in the bathtub, maybe a sensual massage that could lead to more.

"But my bathtub isn't big enough. There's barely room for one person in there. How about we go to the bathhouse?"

That was not as appealing, but Natsu made himself smile. Spending any time together with Gray, even in public, was enough for him.


An hour later, Natsu and Gray entered Magnolia's public bathhouse. It was famous, and like usual, it was a bit crowded. More and more, Natsu was starting to dislike this idea. He wanted something romantic, and that was not going to happen in a crowded pool filled with sweaty men.

They entered the cleaning section and casually stripped from their clothes. Natsu had seen Gray naked so many times, he really had no reaction to the idea of the Ice-Make wizard getting naked.

Gray, on the other hand, was really struggling with the temptation to look over and watch Natsu as he undid his pants. He had to scold himself. Getting erect in public was simply out of the question, at least not until they were underwater and he could hide himself. Still, by the time he got out of his clothes, he was semi-hard. It was not enough to stand out. With any luck, people would just think he was naturally that long while soft. Still, he walked quickly over to the bathing stools, sat at an empty one, and made the water extra cold before dumping it over his head.

That helped!

Natsu saw that the other washing areas were filled, so he walked over to Gray. "I'll get your back," he offered, and he grabbed the soap out of the ice wizard's hand.

Gray tried to ignore him. He was the one who suggested coming to a public place, after all. However, he had a reason to come here … and thinking about that reason was what made him tingle. He let Natsu scrub his back, and he washed the suds away with more cold water. Dumping the water over his head splashed it onto Natsu.

"Gyaaa! Did you put ice cubes in there?" the Dragon Slayer cried out.

"Just because it's not boiling," he scoffed.

In return, Gray scrubbed Natsu, rubbing the soapy cloth over that bronzed skin while Natsu shampooed his pink hair. The water he used to wash off felt like it had come right out of a steaming kettle. Once they were clean, they headed out to the soaking pool. Gray wrapped a towel around his middle—something he normally never bothered doing—and watched Natsu jump right on in, not at all bothered by the steamy heat. Gray was ambivalent about hot springs, but for Natsu's sake he would put up with it. Even if the Dragon Slayer had seemed less than happy about a public bath at first, he sure looked giddy now. It made what Gray had planned even sweeter, and seeing the other bathers around only heightened his arousal.

Gray discarded the towel and lowered into the water quickly before anyone saw how stiff he was. The heat helped to soften him a bit, but then Natsu had to make it bad again by sliding over to him. Although they were not sitting necessarily too close, Natsu's hand slipped over and touched Gray's knee under the water. That hot caress tormented his composure.

"Sorry if it's not what you had in mind," Gray said, trying hard to sound casual.

"It's fine. I like hot springs."

Natsu's fingers squeezed Gray's knee a little more, and the ice wizard knew he was fully aroused now.

Natsu glanced down and saw the pink head sticking straight up. It made him smirk, seeing how he affected Gray. "You're going to have a problem with that," he teased quietly.

"Probably," he agreed. "Maybe you should touch somewhere else."

Natsu released the leg with a guilty look. "S-sorry."

Gray's hand rushed over through the water and took those fingers. "I meant…" He carefully brought the hand back over, keeping movement above the waterline to a minimum as he brought Natsu's hand a little behind him and to his ass. "…somewhere else."

Natsu's eyes went wide. He glanced around nervously at the busy bathing pool.

"Since it's crowded, nobody will be looking at us closely."

Gray moved Natsu's hand to bring just one finger forward. He pretended to be merely stretching out a stiff muscle, while his hips lifted a little, and he slipped Natsu's hand under him. Slowly, he lowered back into place, and Natsu's index finger slid into his ass. Gray closed his eyes and forced his face to remain unmoved as he carefully settled down onto Natsu's hand. Natsu looked horrified, too scared to pull away. He had never touched another person like this, and feeling inside Gray's ass made him instantly rock hard.

"What are you doing?" he hissed. Had he been speaking at normal volume, Natsu's voice would have cracked. That made Gray a little smug.

"Like this, no one will see." He kept his breathing calm, although it was a little too steady. "Does this hurt your hand?"

Natsu shook his head. "You really are a damn exhibitionist."

"It's not that I want to put on a show. I like the thrill, knowing someone might catch me."

"Do you want someone to see?"

"No! I'd feel ashamed if someone truly did see. What I want is to do as much as I can, push it as far as I can, without getting caught." He smiled over to Natsu, sharing this horrible little secret with him. "That's the thrill: knowing someone might see me, but not wanting someone to see. The dread, the fear, the anticipation that electrifies every touch, being fully aware of my surroundings while I indulge my inner desires, living on that dangerous edge of perversion and discovery, hiding from the whole world what a sick bastard I am … that's all part of the fun."

Natsu did not see how it was fun, but if this was what would make Gray happy, he could indulge him. After all, the ice wizard had given in to Natsu's own perverted kinks last night.

"Do as much as you think you can without attracting attention," Gray whispered, "but when I say stop, you sure as hell stop."

"You're not gonna come?"

"They put magic in the water so if anyone pees or comes, it makes that person's skin look like the Glitter Fairy just pissed all over him."

"Has that ever happened to you?"

"Of course not! I saw it happen to some gay couple once, but they were being obvious. Just stop when I say, and if you think you're about to lose control, get out of the water."

Natsu held still, looking around at the other men soaking. It was separated by gender, so at least no girls were around. If there had been, then having two young, muscular men in the pool would have attracted attention. Instead, it was a pool full of men, people soaking either quietly in their own little area, or clustered in groups, middle-aged businessmen mostly, discussing work, women, and politics over the relaxing atmosphere of the onsen. No one looked their way, or if they did, they saw only two youngsters enjoying the hot water. If Natsu's cheeks were a little pink, or if Gray let out a sigh that hid a moan, it was apparently only due to the heat that relaxed everyone.

Natsu wiggled his finger around, feeling the heat and softness inside. The thought of being inside Gray was enough to drive him crazy. No wonder Gray also warned him to leave the pool if Natsu himself felt overwhelmed.

"I … I don't know where to touch," Natsu breathed, paranoid at thinking that everyone was secretly watching them.

"Feel around," Gray whispered, keeping his breaths even, although he gulped hard. "You'll feel something that's a little different. Hold on." He shifted again, raised his hips ever so slightly, so Natsu go reach in deeper. "Try to go in more."

Natsu readjusted his hand. Suddenly, there was a different texture.

"Mhn," Gray grunted, keeping his lips closed tightly. His body stiffened, but slowly he relaxed. "There," he breathed out, but the air went fast, hiding a moan. Again, he gulped thickly. "How do you like this, Natsu? It's not physically being tied up, but you're restrained through social taboos."

"I thought you said you wouldn't be kinky in public."

"I never said that. I said I wouldn't in the guild, purely out of respect, or a random alley, where it's almost assured that you'll be seen or at least heard. I won't do this where people can see me."

"Gray, a dozen people can see us right now. At least two are looking right at me."

"They won't realize we're doing anything weird so long as you don't screw up. Now, keep doing that. It feels really good. Your finger feels so hot."

"Gray, don't talk," Natsu hissed out. Words like that would certainly undo his composure.

Natsu thrust his finger in, trying not to show anything. Then he saw Gray's hand move down and, ever so secretively, he stroked himself. His face never showed anything. Above the water, all was still. Only Natsu could hear the labored breaths as Gray got excited.

Gray looked around. Everywhere, there were people. Men sometimes glanced over, just casually scanning the pool. Gray wondered if others were doing stuff like this. Could others tell what they were doing? If they were caught—

That was what made his heart race. If he was caught … if people found out … if they knew what a twisted man he was—

He wanted to push that thrill, and doing this with Natsu was the best way. Natsu, who had never touched a man like this before … Natsu, who had been a virgin just yesterday, no experience, so obviously nervous … Natsu, who now had his whole secretive self literally in the palm of his hand. Oh yes! Doing this with Natsu was a hundred times more thrilling than merely masturbating in public.

Now, he could share the experience!

Gray's other hand reached over to Natsu's cock, stroking the shaft with unendurable slowness, just a mere tease. Natsu's eyes fluttered down. Gray's hand felt cold, even under such hot water. Natsu fought the desire to thrust into those chilly fingers. Then his eyes widened. He needed to keep watch. He needed to make sure no one was coming over to them, no one was watching too closely, or looking suspicious. He needed to protect Gray's secret, just as Gray was keeping secret the fact that Natsu liked to be tied up.

If not for the magic in the water, Natsu felt he would have loved to stroke off Gray, just to see if he could stay this passive even during such an overpowering moment.

Gray's eyes stayed forward, focused on the group of businessmen who were starting to get rowdy. "Damn noisy old men!"

"G-Gray…"

Hearing the shudder in Natsu's voice, he looked over in a jolt. "Are you okay?" He saw Natsu was really having a hard time holding back. "You don't have to push yourself. Get out if you need."

"No, I'm fine."

"Natsu, you'd humiliate me as well if you came in this pool."

"I wouldn't do that to you, Gray." When his eyes opened, they were calmer and shined with confidence.

Seeing that face, realizing the utter trust he was giving to Natsu, suddenly overwhelmed Gray. "Okay, stop … stop," he warned, letting go of Natsu and moving his hips up again. "Pull out slowly." Reluctantly, Natsu pulled his hand back. "As I thought, it's harder to last a long time when I'm with someone rather than on my own."

"Sorry—"

"No, it just means you're too good."

Hearing Gray say that boosted Natsu's ego.

"If you climb out facing the bamboo over there, no one will see your front."

"You picked this spot for that purpose," he realized.

"Yes. I don't want anyone to see either of us erect. There's a love hotel across the street."

"I thought you didn't want to do anything to my ass."

"I won't. You need to heal that part or it can be bad."

"Then why a love hotel?"

Gray smirked with dangerous eyes. "I only said I'd leave your ass alone. I didn't say anything about the rest of you. I have something planned, something I think you'll really like."

Natsu gulped hard. A threat like that shot fire right down to his groin.

"Leave the pool two minutes after me, get dressed, and then head over to the hotel. I'll be waiting."

"Why wait two minutes?" Deep inside, Natsu wanted to rush over to the hotel right away, without drying off or even dressing.

"Idiot, so no one suspects anything. Try to get that boner settled before you go. And don't look at me with that childish pout. I'll have it back up for you in no time."

Gray turned carefully, so no one could see his arousal, and stepped out. Quickly, he wrapped his towel around his waist. Then he walked away, and if anyone saw some stiffness in his towel-covered lower half, they thought it was merely a natural reaction to the heat and cold. Natsu waited, wondering what Gray had planned. How would he restrain him this time? What was he going to do?

I have something planned, something I think you'll really like.

No, he couldn't think about that! He needed to calm down. Looking around at these strange men got his erection to go down quickly. None of them appealed to him, even the younger ones. None of them would want to tie him up. Or if they did, they would not be fierce enough. They could never be as cold as Gray.

Once he was totally flaccid again, he climbed out and returned to the dressing room. He dried, dressed in his clothes, and went out of the bathhouse. Right across the street, he saw the love hotel. It had a private back entrance, but if a person knew which alley to look into, anyone could still see that someone was heading to the hotel.

Gray was waiting for him in that building. Gray wanted to tie him up and do something kinky, something that had made his eyes glitter like frost. Natsu's whole body burned hotly by the thought of it. His cock threatened to stiffen again. He hurried forward, vanished into that alley, and followed arrow signs to the back entrance of the hotel.

Gray was standing in the lobby, arms folded impatiently, a key already in his hand. His eyes flicked over at the sight of pink hair, and Gray gulped when he saw the lust simmering in Natsu's narrow eyes. Silently, with just a crook of his finger, he beckoned the Dragon Slayer to follow him. Natsu stalked after him, his heart pounding, his cock twitching already, curious what the ice wizard had in store for him.

Chapter Text

They got into the hotel room, and instantly Gray slammed Natsu up against the door, not even waiting for it to fully close. He tore the white muffler off and immediately began pulling at Natsu's clothes. Natsu fumbled with Gray's shirt, lacking the dexterity of the stripper. Gray pulled back, his mouth dripped with Natsu's saliva, and he yanked his shirt off fast. Then he pulled Natsu's shirt off and hungrily slid his hands up the burning torso.

"Nngh … ahh," Natsu moaned as Gray gave him kisses down the neck. "Gray…"

The ice wizard suddenly bit right on the pulse and sucked hard on it. Natsu cried out with a little pain. He was being marked again, and it made him want Gray…

Too much.

"Tie me up," he begged.

Gray chuckled at his eagerness. "Can't I enjoy it?"

"Please…" Natsu squirmed as Gray twisted his nipples. "I'm gonna go crazy. I need to be tied up first."

Gray peered down into Natsu's flushed face. "I brought handcuffs."

"Mmmmm … yeah," he groaned.

"Have you ever tried handcuffs, Natsu?"

He squirmed a bit. "Nngh … no. But I want to. I had dreams about it. About being handcuffed."

"Yeah," Gray purred. "That's what I want to do to you." He had remembered Natsu telling him that. It was why he brought them along, as a special treat to make up for the mess of getting drunk earlier. "That bag. I brought the handcuffs in that."

He stepped away and picked up a bag he had carried with him to the hot springs. Buried on the bottom were steel cuffs. They clanked as Gray pulled them out, and he showed them to Natsu, dangling them like both a threat and a promise.

"I'm going to cuff you," he sneered, and the lust within him was nearly at a breaking point. "Get out of your clothes and onto the bed. Now!"

Natsu scampered over to the bed, unbuckling his pants as he went and yanking them off his legs as he collapsed onto the love hotel's firm mattress. Gray also loosened his leather belt and dropped his trousers and boxers to the ground, stepping out fully naked. He stalked over to the bed, and Natsu watched him with bated breath.

"Hands up," he ordered, and Natsu snapped to obey.

Natsu watched the ice wizard pull the metal handcuffs out from behind his back, holding them between his fingers like a sinful treat. Gray sat on the side of the mattress, stared down hard at the anxious pink-head, and then he suddenly yanked Natsu's hands up a little harder, making the Dragon Slayer grunt. He clasped one cuff around Natsu's left wrist, wrapped the chain around the bars of the cast-iron headboard, and snapped the other cuff tightly around the right wrist.

"Ow!" Natsu yelped as the metal bit into his flesh. "Hey, careful."

Gray just laughed. "They're metal. They hurt. They're not like the fuzzy ones I have. These are the type that will leave dark bruises on your skin."

Natsu licked his lips lustfully at the thought.

"So don't pull too hard. You'll really bruise yourself, and then what will Lucy and Erza say?"

Flippantly, Natsu stated, "Who cares what they say?"

Gray just smiled down at his captured dragon. "Yeah, but if they ask, what would you tell them?"

"I wouldn't tell them about us," Natsu promised. "You don't have to worry about that."

"Good," Gray said seriously. He definitely did not want people in the guild to know he had these sorts of tendencies, but then again, he was sure Natsu felt the same way. What would people say?

Gray gazed over the muscular body, his eyes taking it all in, yet he lingered on the stiff mast sticking up through wiry, dark-pink hair.

"You're really hard, Natsu. Just look at that cock," he breathed in admiration. If Gray ever wanted to worship anything, this was certainly praiseworthy. "You're wet already." He swiped a pearl of pre-cum off and licked it.

"Gray…" Natsu's voice trembled in pleasure.

Gray stroked Natsu's cock slowly, lazily enticing it. "Did you like touching me in the hot spring?"

"Mm-hmm," Natsu said, nodding fervently.

"I liked it," Gray moaned breathlessly. "I like to feel you in me." He looked down sternly. "I want to feel you in me, Natsu."

The trance Natsu had fallen into suddenly shattered, and he jolted with wide eyes. "Wait … what?"

Gray smirked playfully. "You heard me."

"Gray!"

"I … want … you … to … fuck … me," he said slowly.

"No…" Natsu yanked on the handcuffs. "Please, Gray. Not that."

Gray chuckled lightly. "What's wrong with you? You were okay using your finger."

"That's … different."

Gray squeezed Natsu a little harder, stroking faster. The Dragon Slayer's body arched up off the mattress. He yanked on the handcuffs again, rattling them against the metal headboard.

"Nngh … Gray…"

"Do you like me touching you?"

"Ye- … mmm…"

"You feel ready, Natsu," Gray moaned in a whisper. "You feel ready for my ass. I need to be ready for you." Gray reached to the nightstand. Being a love hotel, it always had lube ready, and he smeared a little onto his fingers. Then he reached under him and pressed a finger inside his ass. He hummed at the slippery middle finger slid in.

Natsu stared, enthralled by the sight of that finger disappearing into the ice wizard's body. He remembered the feel, how only a few minutes ago, it was his finger in there. Pure amazement and shuddering lust filled him.

"Gray," he whispered in awe.

"Do you like watching me touch myself?" Gray slipped out, and then he forced a second finger in. "Nngh! Fuck." He opened his eyes and saw that Natsu had calmed down just watching him. He smirked at the reaction. "Do you like to watch me—nngh—slide my fingers—mmh—inside?"

Natsu felt embarrassed that he liked watching so much. "I … I don't—"

"Shhh." Gray had an understanding smile. "I'll take care of the prepping. You don't have to worry."

"Th- … that's not it," Natsu stuttered.

Gray tenderly caressed the flushed and anxious face. "Don't worry, Natsu." Then he realized something. "You've never entered someone, have you?"

"N- … no," Natsu admitted awkwardly.

"It's okay. It's normal to be nervous your first time."

Natsu looked frustrated. "Gray, that's not it."

"Shhh," he hushed again, stroking the pink hair. "It'll be okay. I'll take care of you. I think I'm spread wide now." He straddled over Natsu and crawled to sit right on his groin. Then he took the bottle of lube and drizzled some onto Natsu's cock.

"Gray, please!" Natsu begged in desperation, trying to draw back, away from the cold, thick liquid.

"Hey, it's not going to hurt you." Then he softened his voice. "And it's not going to hurt me too badly. It's going to feel good. You're going to make me feel … very good. You want to make me feel good, right?"

"Well, yeah, but—"

Again, Gray hushed him. He smiled down with confidence. "Here we go."

He took hold of Natsu's arousal, stilling it as he sank down onto the cock. Natsu cried out at the tightness around him and all that warmth covered over him. He shook his head, but still Gray sank down, gritting his teeth as he spread open wider.

"Gray…" Natsu sobbed.

"Almost … ooh … yeah…" Gray felt himself sitting full on the cock. Goddammit, it hurt! "I can do this," he said to himself. Then he smiled down at the quivering boy. "Your little dragon is hungry." He chuckled at the annoyance in Natsu's face. Even glaring at him like normal, he was cute. "All right. Just give me a moment. Shit, you're huge."

"Gray…"

"Do you like to feel inside of me?"

"Yeah."

"How does it feel?"

"Nngh … I don't know," he mumbled. "You're … tight."

Gray chuckled softly. "Well, that's good."

Natsu peeked an eye open. "Have you ever … ever done this?"

Gray frowned a bit. "Let's not talk about that. It's just us here."

Natsu pouted. "Then you have."

"Please, let's not talk of the past." Still, as he tried to adjust to Natsu's size, he saw the Dragon Slayer giving him a demanding look, silently ordering him to confess. "Fine," he groaned in annoyance. "Once. It didn't mean anything, just … an experiment."

"You mean like this, tied up?"

"Oh, hell no. Look, I … I don't want to get into that."

"Who was it?" Natsu demanded quietly, clenching his cuffed fists.

Gray looked away. "Dammit—"

"Tell me who."

"Look, I really—"

"Who!"

Gray began to feel angry by the jealousy in those narrow eyes. "I don't even know. Okay?" he shouted. "It was just … someone. A one-night stand." Natsu still glared. "I'm telling the truth. I didn't get his name … or I was too drunk to remember. I just recall meeting him, going home, it happened, and in the morning he was gone and my ass was killing me. Look, I really don't want to think about that. I want to be with you. I want to feel you, and I want you to like this. Okay? Do you like it?"

"I … I don't know," Natsu admitted.

Gray chuckled softly. "Well, that's because I haven't moved yet. I think I'm adjusted. Here we go."

He raised his hips, and Natsu's cock slid along the lubed hole. The Dragon Slayer shuddered at the feel. It was so amazing, far better than anything he had ever experienced before. Then slowly, gripping the sheets, Gray lowered himself down again.

"Nngh!" Natsu clenched his teeth as the ring of tight muscles squeezed him. There was something … familiar. Something dark that loomed just behind the bright pleasure. Natsu wanted to ignore that shadow and indulge in Gray.

Gray felt loosened now, and the face under him kept him relaxed as he began a rhythm, riding slowly on top of Natsu, sliding up and down, letting his thighs do the work, while under him the Dragon Slayer writhed in pleasure.

"You like that, don't you?" Gray panted through the pain. "Up—uuughand down—nngh, God! Shit, you're huge. Nngh!" He panted. The smile of euphoria Natsu had pleased him. "Do you like that? Do you like how I'm squeezing you? I'm gonna make you come."

Natsu suddenly tensed up. The shadow in his mind lunged forward. A face. Cruel words. I'm gonna make you come, boy…

Gray saw those squinty eyes widen, filled with panic. Natsu trembled violently and choked out a suppressed cry. His mouth opened like he wanted to scream, but the squeezing tenseness of fear silenced him.

"Natsu?" he asked sternly. What was happening? Natsu looked horrified. No, beyond just being scared. He looked like he had just seen Death … or worse.

"Ru- … reh…"

"Natsu—?"

"RED!" he screamed, thrashing under Gray, trying to get away. "Red, red, red!"

"Shit!" Gray quickly pulled away, not caring how much doing that hurt his ass, and he sat to the side with Natsu still screaming the color over and over, convulsing in terror. "Natsu!"

"Red, red, red—"

"Hey, it's over, okay? It's all over."

Natsu suddenly sneered at him with flames dancing on his skin. In an animalistic growl, he snarled, "Release me, you sick bastard!"

Gray flinched hard, feeling like he got punched in the gut. He quickly reached up and unlocked the handcuffs. He thought Natsu might actually attack him. Instead, the teen curled into a ball, rubbed his wrists, lightly felt his neck, and huddled down, shuddering, breathing heavily, snuffling his nose.

"It's okay, Natsu," Gray whispered, trying to comfort him by wrapping his arms around that hot body. "It's all over."

"Gray…" he shivered.

"I'm right here." He began to caress Natsu's neck and shoulders.

"NO!" Natsu screamed, pulling away again. "Don't touch my neck."

Gray's hand drew back. He watched in confusion and fear, wanting to help Natsu, but he had no clue what to do. He began using those safewords, after hearing that they were the best way to make sure a lover did not go too far, but he never had a partner use the highest level on him. Not only that, but Natsu seemed to be reliving something.

Something really bad.

Something that worried Gray.

"S-sorry," Natsu muttered, not fully calmed down yet, but a little better. "I'm sorry for freaking out like that."

"It's fine." Gray tried to sound understanding, although he did not comprehend the situation at all. "That's what those words are for."

But no one had ever gone the highest level.

What the hell was going on?

With the dread fading, something else filled Gray. Guilt! He had pushed Natsu too far, and he felt like a wretched asshole for traumatizing him like that. It was not what this sort of sexual play was about. Not at all! It was supposed to be about having fun, indulging in the quirks that made sex more enjoyable. It was meant to be fun play, not agony, and not something to induce a panic attack.

Yet with the guilt came anger. Why had Natsu not warned him? Why did he freak out? If it was so bad—

"You should have said Yellow before it got that bad," he yelled in accusation. "I don't know your limits. I don't know—" Gray broke off, tears choking his throat, truly shaken by this. "I don't know what's okay and what's not."

He really did not know anything about Natsu, not on this level of intimacy. Traumatizing him was the ultimate betrayal of the trust that was vital for any encounter involving bondage. Without trust, there could be no relationship. Pushing Natsu this far was a sign that he could not read the body language of his partner. It meant he was a failure as a Dominant. He did not deserve someone to be submissive and obey him!

Still, failure in his role was secondary to being a failure toward Natsu. He knew Natsu had issues. This was only their second time together, and already he was pushing Natsu's limits to this degree. To go Red! The last thing Gray wanted was for Natsu to leave because he fucked up.

I pushed him too far. It's my fault! It's my fault! It's my—

"It's my fault," Natsu mumbled, echoing Gray's own thoughts. "I thought I was okay. I thought I could handle it … and then suddenly … I couldn't. It just … hit me too fast."

"Can I ask what triggered it? Whatever it was, I won't ever do it again."

Natsu snuffled moistly. "A combination. What you were doing. What you said."

"What did I say?" Gray asked quietly, truly worried now.

Natsu squirmed around, trying to loosen up his tensed muscles. "You said … 'Do you like that' and … and about squeezing and…" He was practically in tears. "…and 'I'm gonna make you come.'" His voice cracked as he repeated those dreaded words, and he rubbed his neck again. "You said it while … while doing that to me."

Gray's brow tensed up. "Natsu—?"

"Don't ask!" he screamed in shuddering panic. Natsu curled into a tighter ball and whispered, "Just … don't ask. Please."

"All right." Hesitantly, Gray hugged Natsu around from the back and pulled him up into his chest. He kissed the sweaty, salty shoulder and rested his cheek on the warm back, making sure to avoid contact with Natsu's neck. "I'm right here, Natsu. I'm not gonna hurt you. I'm not gonna pry. I'll just stay right here with you."

"Thank you," he sighed weakly. "I'm so sorry."

"No, it's fine. We all have our limits, so don't worry about it."

"But…" Natsu twisted around to look at him. "I did like it," he assured with a smile.

That gave Gray a little relief. "That's good."

Natsu glanced down at the other's turgid cock. "Y-you still need it, right?" he asked hesitantly.

"Don't worry about me," Gray quickly assured, ignoring the aching arousal.

"I … I thought … m-maybe I could watch you."

Gray saw the excitement return to Natsu's eyes. He was shaken, but he was still eager, biting his lower lip with uncertainty. "Do you mean you want to watch me touch myself?"

"Mm-hmm," Natsu said eagerly. "Keep me handcuffed, and then touch yourself while kneeling over me. But don't touch me."

"You just want to be teased," Gray realized, and already his heart was beginning to thump at the prospects.

"I … I want you to … come on me," Natsu whispered heatedly. "I want to feel it drip all over me."

"Shit!" Gray hissed quietly, steeling himself back as his cock surged due to Natsu's erotic gaze and salacious words. His breathing came faster, and he licked his lips as they began to dry out from panting. "You want to watch, huh? Wanna see how I touch myself?"

"Mm-hmm," Natsu practically whimpered. His chest also moved faster.

"But no touching?"

"Nuh-uh." He shook his head firmly.

Gray picked up the handcuffs and chained the Dragon Slayer to the headboard again. Natsu gave a pull on his wrists, making sure he was secured, while Gray crawled down his body.

"Knees together," he ordered.

Natsu obeyed quickly, clamping the legs together. Gray settled over his thighs, his knees on either side, and smiled down at Natsu's enthralled gaze.

"You want to see how I like it?" he whispered. "Want to see how I do it to myself?" His hand slid down his torso, running over the taut muscles and scars. "I don't start right away. I have to build up the energy, y'know. It's really like pushing all that sexual energy … down." His hand caressed down his lower stomach, skipped over the groin, and went to his thighs. "Then up." Both hands now dragged up his thighs, and Gray shuddered, as if he really was directing a magical flow of erotic power through his whole body. "When I do this, my whole body feels colder than usual. Except here." He did not touch yet. He looked down at the strain of his erection. "That part's burning hot. But I still don't touch there yet."

He spread his legs a little more, reached down, and cupped his balls hanging heavy with building need.

"Here first. Just a little bit. Just stroking them." He closed his eyes as his fingers rolled the balls gently. "But then, quickly here." His right hand kept massaging, but his left hand grasped his cock, pumping with rough speed. "No pretext. Quick and hard, right from the start."

Natsu gulped through his dry throat as he watched Gray jerking himself fast. This was not the way he had expected. Natsu had never really been able to jerk himself off, not with his issues, so watching someone else do what he always wished he could freely do was exciting, yet also made him jealous. Natsu knew he had a serious issue. He couldn't come from desire alone. He had to mentally think he was being forced. But Gray … Gray wanted release, and he indulged in it. Natsu imagined, what if he could do that too? What if he could simply touch himself and pleasure his own body?

Gray glanced down and saw those narrow eyes glaring with longing. "Wanna touch?" he teased.

The desperation in Natsu's brow tightened. "I … can't."

"I could release one hand. You could touch yourself—"

"I can't!" he shouted with frustration growling in the back of his throat.

"Okay," Gray said instantly, keeping his voice calm, although Natsu's issues were disconcerting. "Just keep watching me. It feels good," he groaned. Then Gray smirked at him. "I like to have you watch."

The fast rhythm began again, skin slapping skin. Although he had already been hard for at least half an hour—hell, he'd been hard off and on since waking up that morning—he wanted to put on a good show. Having Natsu watch him fulfilled the slight exhibitionist tendency within him. In public, Gray did not want anyone to find out, but here, in private, having someone watch him was thrilling.

"Oh God, Natsu," he moaned. His back arched for a moment, and the pace slowed down. "I don't like coming too soon," he said, as if he had to narrate the whole act. "But I like it fast."

He began again, a steady but quick stroking. Then when it seemed like his wrist might tire out, his hips did the work instead, snapping into his hand just as he had been thrust into Natsu the night before, slamming him into the tiles of his bathroom.

"Oooh, fuck yeah," he groaned.

Natsu watched with near agony. He remembered the physical sensations of sliding into Gray, and as he watched, he imagined himself doing that. He wanted to do that to Gray, to thrust into him, to snap his hips and pound into that cold ass. Mental fuckery aside, he wanted the physical pleasure that was so close, yet so astronomically out of his reach.

Then Gray sat back on his haunches. "God, I'm so close. So close," he panted heavily. "I don't want to come too soon, though. I like to keep feeling it. I like to make it last. Shit, but my balls are so tight." He gasped as he realized this really was far more amazing than his usual solo sessions. Gray licked his lips, and then he lazily opened his eyes to look down at Natsu. The sight of the pink-haired Dragon Slayer handcuffed under him was almost too much. Gray felt a stab of need, and he grabbed his cock harder. "Do you want me to come?"

Natsu did not answer right away. He was trapped in a daze and hardly aware that Gray had even spoken.

"I won't if you don't want me to. This is all for you, Natsu. It's your own private show. So tell me what you want to see."

Natsu tried to speak, but his throat was parched like a man who had not drank in days. He swallowed a couple times before words could escape.

"I want you to come. I want it to splatter all over me."

That stabbing need became a goddamn spiked battering ram, slamming into Gray's libido and breaking apart the ramparts. He almost doubled over as his body shivered at Natsu's words. His hand instinctively moved faster, and his hips began to work in tandem.

Natsu smirked as he saw the look of being overwhelmed. "I wanna watch you lose it. For me, Gray. All over me. I want to feel it dripping over my skin—"

"Shut up, Natsu!"

He chuckled playfully. "Did I find your weakness?"

Gray glared down at him. "Bastard."

Natsu licked his lips, savoring having a little control over him. "Come for me, Gray," he urged.

"You don't have to—nngh—tell me. Almost there. Almost … gyaaah!"

The slap of flesh against flesh got faster, and Gray no longer tried to make moans that would turn Natsu on. He growled and cursed. Then his head flew back.

"N-Natsu…"

He went silent. His breath caught, his body tense, and Gray did not even breathe as strings of whiteness shot out, splattering across Natsu's chest.

Gray felt incredible. He needed that release … so much!

The searing heat that had built up in his cock eased away, melting back into the rest of his body. He shuddered out a breath, utterly overwhelmed … amazed at how much better even masturbating was when it was with Natsu. He looked down and saw those squinty eyes staring massively and an insanely aroused cock leaking with Natsu's own excitement. The Dragon Slayer's torso and chest were covered in white wetness.

"Good show?" Gray asked arrogantly.

Natsu gulped hard, enthralled. "That … was the hottest thing I've ever seen."

Gray had to laugh, feeling a little smug that he had been such a good spectacle. Then, still catching his breath, he nodded to the little dragon. "Do you need help with that?"

Natsu shook his head. "Is it weird: not wanting to be touched?"

"No," Gray assured. He climbed off the bed and walked to the adjoined bathroom. "Some people simply have a kink for unresolved sexual tension."

"Is that what it's called?" Natsu mused. Gray returned with a hand towel and wiped up the mess. As Natsu watched, he was amazed Gray fought the temptation to also rub his cock and the pre-cum dripping clear from there. Gray was truly taking care of all Natsu's needs, even the mental mess. "I just want to feel myself hard like this, but I don't want it to end. I don't want to be touched, but I want to stay aroused."

"Just teased, huh?" Gray asked. "Hmm…" He set the towel aside and thought about it. Then he got an idea, a devious and utterly perverted idea, and his voice deepened as he leaned into Natsu's face. "You know, I could really tease you," he whispered in a threatening, seductive voice. "I could tease you … and not even touch you."

Natsu gulped hard. Gray had that look in his face again, a gleam to his eyes like a storm ready to break and sweep away all sanity. "What do you mean?" he asked hesitantly with a tremor in his words.

"I could use something else. Something other than my hands."

Gray looked around, searching the hotel room, and spotted the discarded clothes. Amongst his jeans was his leather belt. He walked over, slowly threaded the belt through the pant loops, and checked out the quality of the leather. Not too frayed, but well worn in. Perfect! He glanced back over to Natsu. The teen's eyes widened as he saw what Gray held in his hands.

"I could use this," Gray said with a smirk. "I could belt you."

Natsu stared, transfixed by the sight of the leather running through Gray's fingers. "Yeaaah," he whispered in rapture. Then he caught himself and shook his head. "I … I mean—"

"Is it too much?"

"No! No, I … I think…" His eyes raised off the belt and up to Gray's face. "I'd like that."

Gray grinned down at the naked, sculpted body and ordered, "Flip over."

Natsu rolled over onto his stomach. Gray set the belt down for a moment and readjusted the handcuffs so they were not twisted and uncomfortable. Then Gray stepped back and gazed on the taut back, firm buttocks, and muscular thighs. Natsu's flesh was so perfect on the backside, a sign that he never turned his back to an enemy.

Gray wanted, so badly, to be the one to mark up that flesh!

Then, in a teasing jeer, he said, "You could always just frot against the sheets."

"Shut up," Natsu snapped. He placed his cheek against the pillow and looked over to where Gray was standing. "Just … do it."

Gray picked up the belt again, grasped the metal buckle in his left hand, and began to wrap the leather around his palm, coiling it until just the right amount of strap dangled in his fist. Slowly, Gray dragged the tip of the leather belt up Natsu's thighs, over the buttocks, and across the back. Natsu's breathing was heavy, but leveling, building tension as he felt the roughness of the leather. He squirmed just a little at the feel of it.

"It's rather tempting, isn't it?" Gray said in a low purr. "Tempting and teasing." He looked down at the half of Natsu's face that he could see. A moment of pity tickled his mind. "This is going to hurt, you know."

"Yeah, I … I can take it," Natsu insisted stubbornly.

"Are you sure? If this is too much, after what just happened … if you even get a hint that it's too much, just say Yellow."

"Yeah, I know."

Gray glared at him. "I'm serious, Natsu. Don't do what you did before. Don't be afraid to say Yellow."

"Okay, really, I got it."

Gray hoped he really did. He dragged the belt over Natsu's skin some more.

"You feel the leather on you, waiting for it." He looked once more at Natsu's face. "Are you ready for this?"

The Dragon Slayer gulped thickly. "I think so."

Gray raised his left hand above his head and swiftly swung the belt across the pale ass. The crack of the leather striking flesh was clear and sharp. The skin jiggled just for a moment before Natsu tensed up.

"Aaah!" he cried out in shock.

Gray leaned down into Natsu's ear. "Do you like that?"

"Yeah," he gasped, nodding frantically.

"Are you okay?"

Natsu spent a moment to make sure, and Gray was thankful that the fire-idiot was actually taking this seriously. "Yeah. Yeah, I think I'm okay."

Gray dragged the leather across the tender skin. Natsu tensed, then relaxed, but as the belt went over the pink stripe slowly rising to the surface, he tensed again, only to slowly release the taut muscles.

"It's a bit of a teasing effect, isn't it?" he said lightly. "The fear. You fear the pain. You wonder when it's going to happen again … and you want it to happen. You want to feel it, and you don't want to feel it, and you're wondering when is it going to—"

Crack!

"Ayyy … heeeh," Natsu cried out with a shuddering exhale at the end. This time, his whole spine arched at the pain.

"—when is it going to hit again," Gray concluded smugly. He laughed sadistically. Then Gray looked down at the twin stripes on Natsu's ass. "Well, this is leaving a bit of a mark on here. I like to see you marked. I want to touch it and rub it out. Kiss your flesh. I'm not going to, though," he said decisively. "You told me not to, so I'm not going to. The only thing that will touch you is the tip of my—"

Snap!

Natsu groaned and fisted up his hands.

"—of my belt." Gray sneered as he looked down at now three angry imprints of his belt. "God, Natsu, I want to touch you," he growled in frustration. He heard another groan from the pink-haired man. "Are you okay?" he asked in worry.

"Yeah," Natsu replied quickly.

"If you're not, then—"

"Nngh … No, I'm fine."

"We can stop right now—"

"No!" Natsu cried out in desperation. "Mmh … more. I … I want more."

Gray bit back his lust. "Shit, Natsu. You really drive me crazy, you know that? But you want more, do you? Do you like the pain?"

"I … I don't think it's so much the pain as … as how it makes me feel. Not pain, but…" He shrugged slightly.

"Pleasure?" Gray asked.

Natsu laughed and shook his head. Of course he would think that next. "I don't think it's even that."

"…Punishment?"

By the way Natsu froze, Gray could tell he had guessed it precisely.

"You like the punishment after what just happened earlier. You feel you need to be punished, right?"

"Mhn … something like that. I didn't want to … I really didn't mean to—"

"Shh. Don't," Gray said soothingly. "Don't do it anymore. Don't punish yourself. I'll be the one to punish you."

Natsu gasped and let out a shuddering moan. "Yeah…"

"You want to be punished. You feel guilty, and you want that guilt beaten out of you. You want to be … purged. Cleaned. Of all the filth inside you, all the perversion. All of it."

He cried out desperately, "Yes. Please!"

Gray raised his arm again, and the belt came down with two fierce smacks. This time, Natsu shrieked, and his body shuddered at the stinging agony.

Gray smiled down sadistically and chuckled. "That's what you want, huh? Then ask me," he demanded arrogantly. "Ask to be punished."

Tears were in Natsu's eyes. Gray's words hit deeper than he could imagine, piercing straight to his heart. Now that he realized just why this felt so good, he could focus on that. Focus on being punished. Focus on having those dark feelings beaten out of him.

"Punish me, Gray," he sobbed.

Gray felt his cock leap. "Shhhhhit." He laughed at his own weakness against Natsu's tears. "You're really going to drive me crazy, you know that?" He leaned over Natsu's back and smelled the skin. "I want to touch you so badly. Are you starting to want it too? Want me to rub out the sting?"

Natsu sniffled. "I … I do but I don't."

"It's okay. You don't want to be touched, so we can stay just like this. But … you're driving me crazy now." His voice took on a more sinister snarl. "You're not letting me touch you. Which means I have to punish you more."

His arm lifted, the belt struck down, twice in a figure eight, two sharp, singing, staccato snaps. Natsu's head lifted back as he moaned wantonly.

"Dammit, Natsu! I really want to fuck you," Gray growled.

Despite his earlier release, Gray was starting to get hard again, aching in his groin that was already worn out. He had to pause. He needed to collect himself, calm down, and regain his wits. He looked back down. The two recent strikes had hit wide, one to the lower back, the other closer to the thighs. They joined the other five that striped Natsu's buttocks. The lashes looked like they were ready to bleed.

"You're … really getting red," he said softly, worrying if he had once again taken things too far. "We should probably quit."

Natsu tried to look back, his eyes moist, but panic in his face. "But Gray—"

"No. I'm just going to keep hitting you, and it'll hurt. Too much."

Natsu fisted up his hands in frustration. "I … want more. Please. Just … a few more." Gray looked at him questioningly. "Um … gimme three?" Natsu proposed.

"Three?" Gray asked in amusement. That would make ten total. Gray had not imagined that they would even get more than five. "You really are a masochist."

"I … don't feel right yet," Natsu mumbled, not understanding it fully.

Gray hummed, debating what to do. Any more and Natsu really might get a permanent mark. Then again, perhaps he needed this more than Gray imagined. He needed the guilt beaten out. He needed pain to cleanse him of whatever made him feel so disgusting, he did not even want to be touched.

"All right. I'm going to give you three. They're going to be quick … and hard. The first one will purge out all of your guilt. The second one will purge out all your shame. The third will purge every bit of disgusting filth in you. Is that okay?"

"Yes," Natsu said, sounding solemn, like this was a pact with the Devil.

"Okay. Only three. After those three, no more guilt, no more shame, and you won't be disgusting. You're just going to be Natsu. You'll be the same Natsu you were before any of this happened. Okay?"

Natsu didn't sound all that convinced when he mumbled, "Okay." He added, "Just make them really hard. Really punish me. I want to remember it."

Gray nodded seriously. "All right."

He dragged the belt over the flesh some more. He teased Natsu so he would not know when it would come. Natsu lay on the bed, tensed up, wondering when it was going to strike, feeling the slow drag of the leather over his sensitive skin, stinging him whenever it went over one of the burning lashes. He realized Gray was right; he was going to hurt bad in the morning. Right now, the pain felt so good. It was a reminder that he was human.

Without any warning, the strikes came. They were loud, and they hit the skin so hard, Gray thought for sure it would leave behind blood. Three brutally hard slaps tormented Natsu's flesh, one to the lower back, one to the ass, and one went diagonal across the buttocks to the upper thigh.

Smack, smack, smack!

Natsu screamed by the third one, and Gray was panting too hard. Even if Natsu wanted more, Gray probably would not be able to go on any further.

Sure enough, the belt dropped to the floor and Gray collapsed on top of Natsu, not holding him, but caging him in with his body, keeping just high enough so that nothing touched the Dragon Slayer's back, only the coldness of the ice wizard's skin radiating down to his flesh, a soothing coolness against the hot, marked, aching skin.

"Natsu, you're going to be the end of me one of these days," Gray panted. "Fuck, you are too … damn … hot!"

Natsu was lost in a world of pain and pleasure, purged of all guilt, feeling normal again. He felt aching, but the ache was a good sort of pain. It felt good to hurt. It felt good to be punished. He felt like he could walk out of that room and all that had happened—freaking out, nightmares of the past—all of that was gone. All of that had been beaten out, purged. There was a certain euphoria that flowed in, like water filling a hole that had been shoveled out of his soul. It was such a sweet feeling after the pain, so sweet it made him want to cry.

With the beating over, Gray's cock was realizing it really was too tired, and it shank quickly. However, the adrenaline was still thrumming through his veins.

"Gray?" Natsu muttered after a long silence. "Cuddle me."

Gray laughed in weariness. "You and cuddles, huh?" he asked teasingly.

"I just … I need it."

"All right," Gray said with a smile, "but … you still don't want to be touched, right?"

"Oh! I mean … down there. You can wrap your arms around me."

Gray snorted out a laugh. "Natsu, you're probably hard as a rock."

"Yeah, but … I just don't…" Natsu shifted around uneasily. "It's weird, isn't it?"

"No," Gray assured him, stroking his hand through Natsu's hair. "I told you, it's not weird. Nothing we do is weird. I mean, it's sex. Everything is weird. Everything is perverted. There's no such thing as normal sex. It's all perverted. Even plain vanilla sex, it's still perverted, right? So this, what we do, it isn't weird. It's just our way of … of … of having sex."

Natsu looked around over his shoulder. "Having … sex?"

"Well, yeah. I mean, we sort of are, in our own way." Gray paused and thought it over. "I guess it is a little weird to think of it as having sex with you, rather than just play, but … but that's what it is, right? It's our way of expressing…" His words broke off again as Gray found himself stumped.

"Expressing what?"

He considered it, but Gray pouted as he gave up trying to explain it. "Hell if I know."

He was done talking. He unlocked the handcuffs, and Natsu rubbed out his wrists. Then cold arms wrapped around him.

"Are you really sure you're okay?" Gray asked tenderly.

Natsu snuggled down into that embrace. "Yeah, I think I'm over everything that happened earlier."

"Well, if you ever need to talk things ov—"

"No!" he shouted, and then he muttered, "No, not…" He sighed in frustration. "Not yet."

"Okay. Just letting you know."

"Yeah … and thanks, Gray. I really do appreciate it, but … but I … can't talk about it. Not yet. Just hold me."

Gray squeezed him a little tighter. "I'll hold you, Natsu. I'll hold onto you for as long as you need me."

Natsu sighed and relaxed into Gray's arms. The ache of arousal slowly drifted away. For some reason, leaving that tension unresolved felt like even more punishment, and thus more thrilling. It all melted apart. The arousal, the doubt, the fears, it all shank and went away, drifting through the universe, never to haunt his mind again.

Not until the next time.

But for now, he was free of the past, and all that existed was a present of corporeal aching, emotional catharsis, and soul-rending weariness. He was not even sure when he fell asleep. He was simply out, conscious then not, drifting on a lake that reflected his own face, and it was not a dark face anymore. It was peaceful, relaxed … all thanks to Gray.

Chapter Text

Natsu woke up already handcuffed to the hotel bed's headboard. Drowsy and cranky with sleepiness, he glared around the room until he saw Gray sitting in a chair by a desk, writing on a piece of paper. At the sound of the metal links clanking, the ice wizard set his pen down and looked over.

"Sorry for the cuffs, but I wanted to make sure you didn't escape from me again like you did last night. We need to talk."

Natsu frowned. "Uh-oh. Whenever someone says that, it usually means I'm in trouble."

Gray laughed silently and shook his head. "No, more like I'm the one who messed up and should be in trouble. I messed up bad earlier. I've spent the past hour coming up with that checklist you mentioned yesterday," he explained, tapping his finger on the sheet of hotel room stationary. "Most of the points on my usual checklist are stuff we've already tried, so this list is shorter than normal."

"A fucking checklist? Seriously?"

"A checklist of fucking, yes," Gray said with complete solemnity. "I have some really bizarre kinks, so something like this is needed."

"Do you do this every time you wanna fuck around with someone?"

Gray stared hard at him for ten whole seconds before quietly whispering, "Is that what this is to you? Fucking around?"

Natsu froze at the caustic words. "I … I don't even know. I mean, yesterday was just so random and sudden. I haven't really had time to think clearly."

"Then we'll skip to question number five. Are you okay with an exclusive sexual relationship?"

"Exclusive?" Natsu muttered. Him and Gray … being exclusive. It made him blush. "A-are you asking me out?"

"If that's what you want. This isn't fucking around to me, Natsu. Still, asking you out doesn't necessarily mean we'd be exclusive. Some couples prefer not to be."

"I consider dating as meaning exclusiveness. I thought that's what we agreed upon."

"So we did. Okay, then let's back up to question four: Are you okay with an open relationship?"

Natsu felt dizzy. He also felt an urge to go to the bathroom. "Can we discuss this after I pee?"

"No. Look, I only take one partner at a time, but if you want more than one, then that's something I need to know. I can compromise to some extent, but I don't want you cheating behind my back."

"No! No, just one at a time."

"Would you want a threesome if I suggested it?"

Natsu blinked in shock. "I … guess I'd be okay with that. So long as it's someone we both know, someone who we can definitely trust with … with … this secret." The handcuffs clanked again, as if needing to remind Gray that Natsu felt ashamed about his need to be restrained.

"I don't have anyone in mind at the moment. It's just a question. Can I kiss your lips?"

"Haven't we done that?"

"I have a whole list of locations. Lips, cheeks, neck, nipples, belly button, cock—"

"I have to pee here. It's fine, all of it."

"Touching: we've done just about all that," he hummed. "Are you okay having your nipples licked, and with licking my nipples?"

"Yes to both."

"Would you be okay licking or sucking my feet?"

"Whoa … uh, yeah. Totally."

"Can I lick your feet?"

"If you really want to, but I don't think that'll get me off."

"Can I touch you in a sexual way without asking permission?"

"Not in public."

Gray skimmed down and checked off something. "Noted. No public sexual touching without permission. But in private?"

"Sure, if you wanna touch, do it. You don't need to ask."

"Some people are sensitive about that. Are you okay touching me in a sexual way in public?"

"Like earlier in the hot springs?"

"Yes."

"I … well … only if no one can see us."

"Can I touch you in a sexual way in public if I ask permission?"

Natsu thought about it, and his brow began to tense up.

"It's like what we did earlier today."

"I know," he snapped, but still he thought it over. "It's okay so long as no one sees, but I'll probably have to stop you before I get to the point of needing to be restrained."

"Can I touch you in a nonsexual but still romantic way in public, both with or without permission?"

"Do you mean like holding hands?"

"Yes, or caressing your face or rubbing your thigh. Just friendly or romantic touches."

"Do we want others to know about us?"

"That's up to you," Gray replied. "I'm fine if our friends know about us, just not the kinky stuff. If you want to kiss or hug or hold hands in public, I'm okay with a little PDA, so long as we keep it discreet."

Natsu's brow creased as he thought about it. "I'll say yes for now, but I need to think about whether I actually want the guild to know. If they know we're lovers, they'll question how I got bruises around my wrists, and it'd be harder to keep everything else secret."

"Good point. We'll discuss that more later, so a provisional 'yes' to public romantic touches, both with and without permission."

As Gray wrote in some notes, Natsu thought about how a relationship like that would be, to hold hands walking down the streets of Magnolia, to sneak in kisses while cuddled together in a corner of the guild hall, openly discussing romantic dates with their friends—We haven't even gone on a real date, unless the hot spring counts—and overall just being a normal couple … on the outside. In private, they could do all the kinkiness they wanted. It was such a nice thought, a happy future, and it made Natsu blush warmly.

"Are you okay having semen on your body?"

That warm, fuzzy feeling was instantly set ablaze in a sea of embarrassment. "I thought I made that obvious just now."

"I want to make sure. Are you okay with your semen on my body?"

"Yeah."

"Fruits or other food items on your body?"

"If you want, but isn't that weird?"

"Licking chocolate sauce off a lover is actually really fun. We'll try it some time. What about things like oil, lotion, juice, champaign, caramel, slime, foam, or mud on your body?"

"Uh … I'm not gonna ask, but … sure, why the hell not?"

"What about urine, feces, or vomit on your body?"

"Wait, you mean pissing and shitting on me?" Natsu cried out. Warm fuzzy feelings: officially obliterated.

"One or the other, or all of them."

Natsu cringed down. "Vomit and poop, no. I don't want you to poop or puke on me."

"Would you want to piss on me?"

"On … you?" Natsu eyes widened. "Uh, actually … yeah. That sounds hot. Weird, but hot."

"Can I piss on you?"

"Only if we're in a shower and I can wash off right away."

Gray jotted the conditions down. "Would you be willing to drink my urine?"

"Now you're just screwing with me," he grumbled.

Gray looked up from the chart, and his face was dead serious. "I'm not. It's something I think would be really erotic, making you drink my piss. It's sterile and safe, I don't have diseases, and obviously I wouldn't do that if I had a kidney infection or anything, but I have to warn you, it doesn't taste good. Still, it'd be really hot to make you do that."

Natsu's stomach twisted. He used to think his kinks were bizarre, but Gray was on a whole other level. "I honestly have no clue what piss tastes like, but I'm gonna say let's put that one as a maybe for way in the future, and only if you're willing to drink mine in return."

"Noted, and actually, I'd love to."

When Gray said that, Natsu's jaw dropped. The urge in his bladder increased as he thought about letting loose and pissing into Gray's eager mouth. However, the arousal that thought created made the urge to pee hurt. His thighs twisted together as his bladder began to ache.

Gray slowly raised his eyes from the paper and watched Natsu twisting with urgency. He unconsciously licked his lips as he saw the discomfort in the Dragon Slayer's face. "Do you really have to pee?" he asked quietly, feeling his pulse increase.

"I already told you I did," Natsu snapped crankily.

Gray swallowed hard as he felt heat pooling in his groin. "How bad is it?"

"Not so bad where I'm gonna piss myself yet, but my bladder is starting to hurt." Natsu noticed a change in smell in the room, and he looked over to Gray in shock. He smelled the hormones of arousal, and Gray's face looked almost completely overcome by lustful fascination. The stiffness in the boxers was a sure sign that the smell was coming from him. Was he really getting aroused seeing Natsu needing to pee? Natsu smirked a little. "You're one kinky bastard."

"You're one to talk!" Gray snapped defensively. He tried to focus back down on the checklist and ignore the way his heart pounded at the thought of Natsu struggling not to piss himself. "Okay, you managed to flush the ice water out of your ass, but would you be willing to do more? Are you okay taking a crap while I watch?"

Natsu twisted again, but this time he curled his lips. Between his need to pee, the way some of these things Gray listed made him hard, and the pure disturbing images some of the suggestions evoked, he was having one of the worst cranky wake-ups of his life.

"M-maybe. I never really thought about that. But, not standing up like that time. If I happen to be taking a dump on the toilet, and you happen to be in the bathroom, that's fine."

"Would you be okay watching me take a crap, and not in the toilet?"

Natsu grimaced. "I … wouldn't be utterly against it if you got off that way, but I can tell you, it's not gonna turn me on."

"Don't know unless you try. Can I watch you piss?"

"I'm ready to piss now, bastard!" He yanked on the handcuffs harshly.

That gleam of lecherous fascination returned as Gray smirked seductively. "Can I watch?"

Heat seared Natsu's cheeks. The twitching in his cock increased as the cold air against his naked body became even more pronounced. "Fine, I guess that's okay. And I know you're gonna ask, so same for watching you. Watching others use the bathroom isn't arousing to me, but if you want to have me watch, I will."

"What about using catheters?"

Natsu raised a wary eyebrow. "How the hell does that work?"

"I stick a catheter up your dick and either don't let you piss or force you to piss where I want."

"I … don't think so. Actually, no. Big no."

"Okay. Saves me money on buying them. Ice was fine. What about fire?"

Natsu arched an eyebrow. "Really? You have to ask?"

"Okay, dumb question. What about wax?"

"Uh, wax?"

"Dripping hot candle wax on you."

Natsu's gaze drifted, and as Gray watched, he noticed the Dragon Slayer's arousal grew.

"Natsu?"

"Fuck yes," he said hoarsely.

Gray chuckled at the eagerness. He drew a star next to that one. Definitely something to try in the near future. "Um … okay, this will sound weird, but just let me know if any of these are okay: razors, needles, knives, swords, hot pokers, branding utensils, or other hot metal surfaces or piercing utensils used on your skin."

"Hell no!"

"Good. Those are hard limits for me, as well. I don't like getting permanent marks, but if you're into that, I can do that to you. Biting until the skin breaks is a big yes for you. I'm usually not into that, but so long as you can heal it with that dragon-lust-spit-healing-thing, then it should be fine. Let's see … ah! You freaked out when I entered you, but it was only triggered by me speaking. Would you be okay if we tried anal sex again, with you as the giver, if we do it without speaking?"

"I dunno. Maybe."

"Would it be better if the lights were off?"

"No, lights on. I want to see you there."

"Can I turn the lights off other times?"

"Not if I'm inside you. If you're the one pounding into me, we can try it, but it's not as fun, right?"

"Depends. Can I blindfold you?"

"I'll give it a try, but I might need to see depending on the situation."

"Can I gag you?"

"Gag me?" Natsu shivered a bit. "No. No gags."

"Okay. You're obviously fine with me masturbating for you, but would you be okay masturbating for me?"

"I … guess so. At least a little bit, but I can't actually get myself off that way. It's never worked. I can't come unless I'm tied up and forced."

"Are you okay giving manual sex? You know, touching me."

"Touching inside your ass was really nice, but I think I can only do that for a little while, and I'd prefer to have at least one hand restrained."

"Same with touching my dick?"

Natsu stiffened. "I … I don't know. Through your clothes is okay, but when we're in the moment … I don't think I trust myself."

"Okay, limited cock touching. Can I use sex toys: dildo, vibrator, butt plug, anal beads, cock rings, testicle cuffs, artificial vagina…?"

"NO!" Natsu screamed, then suddenly he jolted in shock by his own paranoid reaction. "That … that is…"

"See, this is why I have a checklist. Sex toys are a hard limit." He began to write that down.

"A what?"

"It means I absolutely won't use them on you. Do you think you could use a sex toy on me?"

Natsu was still shaking from the near panic attack. "I … I don't know. Probably something like a … a … what are the plastic cocks called?"

"Dildo."

"Yeah, that might be okay. Maybe okay to use something like that on me too. I think a vibrator would be nice," he muttered, blushing slightly, "but something like a fake vagina … no. Hell no."

Gray watched the tightness in Natsu's brow and the way his eyes flitted back and forth. He really wanted to ask what sort of trauma happened in Natsu's past. The curiosity was killing him. However, he had to be respectful. This was not the time for prying into a bitter past.

"Let's go through one at a time. Dildos are okay. Vibrator, yes. Butt plug?"

"What the hell does that do?"

"What it says. It's like a mini rubber dick, plugs your ass, fills you up, so I can use my cock elsewhere."

"Okay, that's fine."

"Anal beads and cock rings?" By Natsu's confused face and silence, Gray realized he truly was inexperienced and likely too innocent for all these kinks. "Anal beads are a string of balls that go up your ass. I don't own any, but I'm willing to buy some. A cock ring goes around your cock, keeps your erection up and prevents you from coming so you last long enough to fully enjoy what I have to give you."

"Oooh, I like that idea."

Gray chuckled at the brightness in Natsu's eyes. "I'll have to buy one."

"Oh, don't go out of your way."

"Nah, I don't mind. I know a little shop. So yes on both." Gray wrote that down and dragged his finger down to the next on the list. "Are you okay with cock and ball restraints?"

"How the hell does that work?"

"Wraps around your cock, usually to keep you from coming, or around your balls to pull them away from your body. You know how your balls draw up just before coming? The restraint makes you really feel that."

"That's kinda … hardcore, I guess. Still, I don't think I'd have a problem with it."

"I'll put that as a maybe. What about nipple clamps?"

"Um … probably?" Natsu gave a shrug. "I'm not sure what that would be like, but it'd probably be okay."

"How about wearing a chastity belt?"

"Can I still pee in one of those?"

"Of course you can. You just can't touch yourself. I'd like to make you wear one if I have to go on a solo mission. That way you can't masturbate while I'm gone. You'll save all that sexual frustration for me, and only I can release you from your prison."

Natsu felt a wave of dizziness. "Holy crap, I want that," he gasped, and his cock surged at the thought of being trapped, imprisoned, locked away so no one could touch it. He hissed in pain as the attempted arousal reminded him that he had to pee. "Hurry up! I'm ready to piss."

"Oh God…" Gray gasped so softly, a normal person would have missed it, but Natsu's sensitive ears heard the soft hiss. "Okay, um … next one…" Instead, he looked up with interest. "Are you really ready to piss yourself?"

"I can hold it for a few more minutes. Just hurry up."

Gray twisted his hips in the seat to adjust for his arousal. "Erotic electrostimulation?"

"No clue what that is."

"Short version: I zap you. The pain and stimulation can be really pleasurable."

"I'll give it a try, I guess."

"Are you okay with terms of endearment?"

"Call me your cute snuggly dragon and I will punch you in the balls." He watched as Gray began to write that down. "Dude, I was joking."

"I'm not," Gray said seriously. "I'll let you know right now: don't call me Ice Boy, Snow Daddy, Polar Bear, Shades, and sure as hell, don't you dare call me Gray-sama." He shivered slightly at that.

"Juvia would hate that."

"Juvia is why I added that to the list."

"And the others on the list?"

"Old girlfriends or people I don't like."

"I'll probably just keep calling you Droopy-eyed Ice Princess," Natsu said with a cocky smirk.

"Asshole," Gray chuckled.

"I don't have any name I particularly hate, just nothing overly sweet. Oh, and…" Natsu's eyes darkened again. "Don't ever refer to me as Boy. Just … don't."

"Noted. Next question. Are you okay with saying I love you or hearing me say it to you?"

Natsu blinked in shock. "You … love me?"

"It's just a question. Some people really freak out if they hear someone tell them that, or they think it's too embarrassing to say it out loud."

"So then, you don't love me?" If Natsu had been a dog, his ears would have drooped. That was the sort of face Gray saw, and it was precisely what he imagined.

"Just answer the question."

"Not until you answer mine. Do you love me?"

Gray rolled his eyes in frustration. "Something like that…" This was not the time to discuss something so deep. He wanted to get through the checklist. "I'm still trying to sort you out, Natsu. I can determine my own feelings later. I'm not the kind of guy who says words like that on a whim. I can tell you right now, I probably won't say it, or if I do, it won't be often."

Natsu had to admit, he felt disappointed hearing that. He always wanted to have someone who would whisper I love you in his ear. Hesitantly, he mumbled, "Are you okay if I say it to you?"

"It'll embarrass me, so not in public, but in private it's fine."

"I … would probably say it. If I meant it," he added quickly. "And … I'd like to hear it being said to me, but only if you want to."

"Okay." Well, that wasn't awkward or anything! "How do you feel about roleplay?"

"I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Pretending to be something else. Like, dressing up as a police officer, a little schoolboy, a pirate, or pretending you're the dark wizard and I'm the Magic Council soldier."

Natsu began to laugh. "Seriously?"

"I'm not actually into that," Gray assured him. "I just remember that was on my list. Some girls are really into those sorts of things."

Being reminded that Gray had enough sexual experience to even need a list like this, and to have categories geared for women, made Natsu pout with jealousy. "I'm not against it, I guess. Not really my thing, though."

"How about dressing up and acting like an animal, like a dog or cat?"

"Uhhh … not against it, but I don't think that would turn me on."

"We might get you an outfit. Sometimes it's nice to set aside your humanity and act wild like an animal. Are you okay being collared?"

"Just wearing one? Sure."

"Would you be willing to wear one in public?"

"No, nothing kinky in public."

"What if you wore it under your scarf, so no one can see?"

Natsu paused as his heart suddenly fluttered. To wear something as kinky as a collar, a sign that he was the property of Gray Fullbuster, a kink-fanatic, a sexual deviant, to wear that out in public, hidden from sight, feeling the constant fear that his scarf might suddenly shift, someone might see it, and if they saw it, he alone would come under scrutiny … yes, Gray could easily ignore the incident. Natsu wouldn't tell anyone that the collar belonged to Gray. He would suffer the shame alone. Suffer public humiliation! The whole guild would think he was sick, twisted, a pervert … it was the same erotic thrill as earlier that day, fingering Gray in the hot spring. Doing something so naughty, but in a way so no one could see…

"Yeah…" he whispered with a shudder. "I … I'd like that."

Gray had honestly thought he would still say no. Personally, the thought of Natsu wearing his collar, a sign of ownership, out in public was really pushing Gray's comfort level. Then again, what fun was BDSM if you didn't push your limits a bit? Now, as he watched the enthralled gleam in Natsu's eyes as his mind plunged into some sort of masochistic fantasy, Gray put a little star next to Public Collaring and made a mental note to go buy Natsu a nice leather collar. He twisted his hips on the seat as his cock became harder just thinking about it. He needed to keep focused, though. There were still some questions to go.

"Do you mind cross-dressing?"

Natsu snapped out of the fantasy. "What? You want to see me in a dress?"

"More like a corset and stiletto high heels."

"God, that sounds weird," he whispered to himself. "I'll have to think about that. For special occasions, maybe. I don't want to make a habit of it, though. But I'm not buying the clothes. And before you ask, I don't really want to see you dressed as a girl, but if you really wanna, I'm not against it."

"Noted. Now, I just want to make sure: you're okay with whipping, caning, belting, paddling, riding crops, and other forms of impact play, right?"

Natsu smirked seductively. "I liked when you belted me. It hurt … and it felt so good. My ass is still tingling from that."

This time, Gray was the one who felt his cheeks go hot. "I liked that too. I want to do more to you." He gulped down those fantasies for another time. "What parts of your body can I absolutely not touch?"

"Normally, I'm fine with anything, but I might be a little sensitive about my neck. Only touching it. Kissing there is awesome."

"What parts of my body are you not willing to touch?"

Natsu looked over Gray's sculpted body, wearing only boxers with an opened robe draped on. He wanted to touch every inch of it, but … "It's gonna depend. I'm okay with just about anything until I feel too aroused."

"If I were to restrain you, but left you able to move your fingers, could I make you touch me places?"

"I … think that's okay. Actually, I wouldn't mind seeing if I could touch inside your ass so long as my hands are cuffed."

"We'll have to try that."

"Oh, but … not your cock. I mean, at the beginning, I'd like to touch you there, especially through your clothes and watch you enjoy it like that, and maybe if I'm touching you but you're not making me aroused, but … I … I'll probably … hurt you, especially when I'm too horny."

"We'll have to see how far is too horny. Are you okay with me coming in your ass?"

"That … it was okay."

"Can I do it without a condom?"

"Honestly, I might prefer that."

"Are you okay coming in my ass?"

This time Natsu cringed.

"That's a no," Gray realized. "Maybe with a condom?"

"No," he whispered. "Actually, it'd be worse with the condom."

Something about fake vaginas and condoms … Gray would be lying if he said he wasn't curious—and worried—but he let it go. "Would you be okay giving me oral sex?"

Natsu hesitated for a long time. "Maybe if restrained and if you don't touch me."

"Would it be okay if I came in your mouth?"

"Yes, definitely."

"I already tried sucking you and you were okay, but would you be okay if you came in my mouth?"

Natsu again shifted uncomfortably. "Only if you swallow it."

Gray arched an eyebrow. "Mandatory swallowing?"

"Yes. Don't spit it out."

"Wow … okay, I'll note that." What the hell sort of mandate is that? "Would you be okay licking my ass?"

"Actually, that sounds better than sucking your cock."

"And you were okay when I licked your ass, right?"

Natsu's cheeks went bright pink. "That was pretty damn hot."

"I'm glad you liked it. Last ones: Are there any other kinks you specifically enjoy?"

"I don't really know. You've listed a lot that I never even thought about before."

"Are there any you specifically are against?"

"Well, the obvious stuff. No kids, animals, or dead bodies. Don't choke me, that's one I am absolutely against. Nothing that might restrict my breathing, like a gag or covering my nose. Oh, and … okay, this isn't a fetish, but I'd like it if you at least attempt to smell good before we do this. My nose is sensitive, so if you haven't bathed in a week, it's gonna really turn me off. And no using weird smells. No scented candles, incense, strong-smelling oil, and although I can handle light cologne, too much will make me sick. What about you? We should go through this with you, so I know what you want."

"We can later. My normal checklist is longer."

He watched Gray jot down some final notes. "Also," Natsu whispered, "you … you don't have to … make me come. I just want you to know that. Don't feel like that has to happen. I'm … a little afraid."

"About coming?"

"About…" He turned his head aside. "I can't say."

"Natsu, if something is scary, then I definitely need to know about it so I won't do it. I won't ask why it scares you. You're okay with coming, but it seems like you have a lot of specific limitations. That's perfectly fine, but I need to know what those limits are so I don't cross them. The pressure is on me, not on you."

Natsu shifted around on the bed, pulling weakly at his restrained wrists. "It's … about … m-my … stuff."

"Your semen?"

"Yeah," he mumbled. "If you swallow it, that's fine. If it splatters on me or you or on the floor or … if it's out, that's fine. But … when … when it's in something, if it's in your ass, or in a condom, or in a sex toy, or even in a tissue … just … in something … that … that would really make me flip out."

"In … something? Like, if you came in a cup?"

Natsu flinched so hard, the headboard bowed, and his hands began to shake at they clenched tight enough to leave nail marks in Natsu's palms.

"Whoa, okay. Calm down, calm down. I'll put that as a hard limit. We'll never do that. Just keep calm." Gray wrote down everything Natsu had listed along with no semen collection in big letters. He guessed that was the general issue here. "You know, if you have a thing against condoms and your cum being in something, like a vagina, you're gonna have a hard time getting into a relationship with women."

Natsu forced himself to smile weakly over at Gray. "Then maybe I should forget woman and stick to men."

Gray smiled back at him. "Works for me."

"I bet it does." He yanked on the handcuffs. "Now, let me go. I'm seriously ready to piss."

Gray finished the last notes, set the checklist aside, then crossed one leg over his knee and folded his hands together. "Go ahead."

Natsu stared at Gray's cruel smile, sadistic eyes, and domineering posture.

Oh … fuck.

Chapter Text

Natsu felt himself go pale. Suddenly, the bed under him, the metal handcuffs, and his own nakedness were brutally obvious to him. The tinge in his bladder increased merely at the thought of what Gray had just said.

"Wh-what?" he whispered with a shudder.

Gray had a sadistic smirk as he leaned back in his chair like a prince observing the suffering of a bad slave. "Relieve yourself. Right there."

"In bed? Hell no!" Natsu yanked on the handcuffs harder, clanking them against the headboard, not caring that they were leaving bruises. "Let me go."

Gray rose, walked over imperiously, roughly grabbed Natsu's wrists, and encased the Dragon Slayer's arms in ice that would not shatter easily while also prevent him from really damaging his wrists with the metal restraints. "There. Now you can struggle to your heart's content."

"Gray," he screamed. Was the ice wizard really going to force him to wet the bed? Rage and humiliation made Natsu's blood boil. "Why the hell are you doing this?"

Gray sat on the edge of the bed and looked down at him. With a gentle hand, he stroked Natsu's chest, feeling the rapid rise and fall of his lungs and the frantically pounding heart. "I warned you, my kinks are extreme. I won't do this to you all the time, but since I have you here, it's the perfect moment. I'd never want you to ruin my bed like this, but a love hotel's bed gets thoroughly cleaned after every use, so it's okay."

"It's not okay."

"You know how to end it."

Natsu froze in his struggles. He could use a safeword to wiggle his way out of this, but … did he really want to deny Gray from his little guilty pleasure? Did he want to run away? It was humiliating, but it wasn't traumatizing. Then he remembered something.

"I had a dream like this," whispered Natsu. "One of my fantasies. A lady tied me to a chair and made me sit there until I pissed myself. I woke up just before I actually did and had to race to the bathroom before I had an accident."

"Then this is secretly one of your erotic fantasies too, to be humiliated like this."

Natsu frowned, not liking the thought that some part of him got horny thinking about pissing himself. At least he wasn't wearing clothes, and he wasn't in his own bed. Still, having Gray watch was embarrassing.

Then Gray reached down. Natsu thought the ice wizard might start trying to get him aroused—oh, that would just be the worst thing ever—but instead, his cold hand laid flat on Natsu's lower belly … and pressed. The need to pee tripled, and Natsu tensed up to hold back his bladder.

"Yes," Gray moaned. "The more you squirm and try to hold it in, the more turned on I get. So don't piss yourself too soon."

Natsu pulled at his wrists with snuffles already shaking his lungs. "No…"

"Say no and cry, Natsu. Be humiliated, sob, and beg. You know that's what turns me on. Having you completely at my mercy, being in control of you, even controlling when and where you piss, shaming you, making you piss yourself like the bad little brat you are." He pressed on Natsu's bladder again, and the pink-haired teen gave a cry as his thighs twisted.

"Gray, stop it. That fuckin' hurts."

"How about this, then?" He leaned over into Natsu's face. "Don't you dare wet the bed, or I'll have to spank you."

Natsu's eyes bulged, and instead of needing to pee, he suddenly felt like he might get aroused.

Gray chuckled at the reaction. Then he rose and walked toward the bathroom. "I'm gonna take a shower. Seriously, don't piss yourself while I'm in there or I honestly will be angry. Be a good boy and wait until I come out."

Natsu glared hard. "I told you, never call me boy."

Gray's swaggering steps froze, and he looked around in shock. "Oh! I'm sorry," he said sincerely. "I honestly forgot. I'll work on remembering that. Are you okay?" He looked guilty at forgetting a hard limit so soon.

Natsu rolled his eyes. It was not that the name would drive up an instant panic attack. More like hearing that degrading term made him unreasonably furious, and he did not want to feel anger toward Gray when they were playing like this.

"I'm fine. Just hurry up," Natsu snapped. "I'm seriously ready to piss."

Gray clenched his fists as lust surged through him. "Don't piss, Natsu. I'm serious. Don't you dare pee the bed while I'm gone." Then he shut the bathroom door.

Now that Gray wasn't there to watch, Natsu panted hard. He really had to pee, but now he almost wanted Gray to see. He wanted to hold it for Gray. However, when the shower turned on, the sound of the running water tortured his bladder. His thighs twisted, and he tried desperately not to think about the dire need to piss.

His bladder felt so full, he could feel the liquid inside of him. When was the last time he had peed? Sometime before Gray woke up with that hangover. That had been hours ago. It felt like it was past midnight now.

"Oooooh…"

Natsu's torment froze when he heard Gray moan. "Oh my God, is he jacking off in the shower?"

"Ah … mmm, damn. Ooh, Natsu…"

Natsu's cock went firmly hard, and he realized he could not piss like this even if he wanted to. Gray kept moaning, so loudly that Natsu knew he was messing with him. Gray did not moan like that during sex.

"Oh God … ooh fuck, yeah. God, I love being in your burning hot ass."

Natsu flushed, and his stomach began to cramp with dire need. He yanked hard on the ice and handcuffs restraining him. Although normally he could not stand touching himself, he desperately felt the need to make himself come, if only so he could piss.

But … he shouldn't piss. He should wait for Gray.

"Ahh … nngh, yeah … fuck!"

Natsu's cock stiffened and grew hotter. "Dammit," he groaned in agony. "Idiot, Gray. Don't do that."

He rolled over to his side, the best he could do with his hands like this, and curled his legs up to put pressure on his cock to hold it in. The minutes ticked by way too slowly. He had to pee, and it was pure torture to listen to that shower with Gray moaning. His gut burned, his bladder was ready to burst, and he felt like sobbing.

The pressure began to build. Natsu shook his hips, trying to distract himself, and he squeezed his thighs together harder to hold back.

"Fuck it! Goddammit," he whined as the need to go went beyond mere desperation.

He whimpered, clenching tightly, but he felt pressure building in his penis. It filled with piss and engorged painfully. Then Natsu felt a bit of hot liquid drip out. He clenched down harder to stop it and curled his legs up tighter. Still, he felt the droplets of pee drip down the length of his semi-hard cock.

"Oh shit! Dammit … n-no. GRAY!" he screamed.

Mere seconds later, the bathroom door crashed open, and Gray ran out dripping wet and pale, the shower still running behind him. He feared that maybe Natsu was panicking again, but instead he saw the teen curled against the mattress and a small wet spot on the sheets.

"I … can't … hold it," Natsu sobbed with gnashing teeth.

Gray relaxed the tension in his shoulders. "You were this close, huh? You've been good, holding it this long. Good…" He almost said good boy again, but he recalled that Natsu had an issue with people calling him boy. "Good Natsu."

"Gray…"

He stroked the pink hair. "Just a little longer."

"No! I can't hold it."

"Yes, you can."

"No … aaah!" A little more dripped out, but Natsu clenched hard to stop it. "Let me go already."

"Not yet, Natsu. Hold it more."

"I seriously have to pee," Natsu screamed.

"I know. Not yet. Don't piss yourself."

Gray stared at the squirming body, utterly enthralled. Natsu's cock had hardened with the need to pee, and with his arms restrained, unable to grab himself to stop it, his cock leaped and danced its own version of the potty dance. Gray licked his lips greedily as he watched a few more drops dribble out. Already, he was painfully hard from touching himself in the shower, and his breathing was getting deeper, desperate, shuddering.

"Gray," Natsu whined in a strained, high pitch voice. He felt ready to burst, and a tiny splash shot out before he could clench down. The mini shower spritzed his thighs with the potent smell of urine. "Fuck … dammit. I … I wanna piss."

Gray gasped in arousal when he heard Natsu say that, and he grabbed his cock firmly in his hand, stroking himself frantically. "Don't pee yet, Natsu. God, don't you dare pee yet."

Natsu glanced over, and although normally watching Gray frantically touching himself might have aroused him, now it only made his lower stomach coil, which shot white pain through his bladder.

"I … I need to go … now."

Gray was getting more frantic as he watched Natsu struggle. "Not … yet…"

"Gray … Damn! I'm totally ready to piss myself. This isn't funny anymore." Natsu felt more trickle out, and then more. He tried to clench, but the dripping increased. "Dammit … I can't stop it." Shame made his whole body burn. At the same time, he wanted to fully let go. He wanted to spray everywhere. Somehow he managed to regain control, but the mattress under him was getting wet. "G-Gray … it's … warm. Oh God, I'm pissing myself." Tears of shame streamed down his face.

"All right. You can do it, Natsu. Go ahead. Let it g—"

"GRAY!" he screamed, but this time in real anger. "Don't encourage. Discourage. Tell me not to."

Gray smirked even more at the frantic demands. Such a masochist! "Don't piss yourself. Filthy little brat. Would you really wet the bed at your age? Aren't you a grown man? Keep holding it. Don't let your cock drip."

Natsu seemed to react better to that, although it made him squirm much harder. A small spritz came out, but he clenched it off.

"I c-can't … I can't…" Natsu was in tears. The heat in his bladder made his legs feel cold. Natsu bit hard on his lip and curled his legs up to put more pressure on holding it in. "Hurts … it really hurts."

"Keep … holding it." Gray was so close now. He stroked frantically as he watched that cock bouncing with its need to let loose. More small spurts shot out, and Natsu groaned with a high whine each time, trying so hard to hold it in.

"Gray … gonna piss…"

"No, Natsu. Don't wet the bed."

"Fu- … damn … gaaah!"

Acidic burning shot backward and up to Natsu's kidneys. He screamed in true physical pain, and he lost the pinch he had on his self-control. His eyes went wide as he felt the piss jet out. He felt like he could have peed everything out in one massive explosion to rip his cock in two. Instead, the pale yellow stream shot up with a burst of pressure, drenching his belly and thighs and spraying onto Gray's skin. Natsu felt the wet heat dripping over him, dribbling down to the sides of his body, and saturating the bed under him in moist warmth. He smelled it, potent to his sensitive nose, and he heard the hissing as it shot up and rained back down onto him.

He let out a long, shuddering sigh of relief. It felt … so damn good. Almost as good as an orgasm, but on a totally different level, an erotic euphoria in his penis and bladder, spreading through his thighs and lower stomach, growing until the relief covered his whole body in tingling warmth. The release of that pressure against his bladder, prostate, and everything else inside him, his swollen belly slowly loosening as the piss drained: it was all so amazing. It also hurt. He had held it so long, maybe too long. His bladder was in serious pain.

"Natsu!" Gray shouted through lust-clenched teeth. Seeing the bliss on Natsu's face, the shame immediately after, and the helplessness—totally vulnerable, unable to stop himself, unable to cover himself, unable to save his own dignity—was so enthralling, Gray wanted to join in with the release. Instead, he leaned over, put his mouth by the bursting cock, and let it shoot onto his tongue.

Seeing that made Natsu's cock lurch and sputter for a moment in arousal, except now he was too far gone pissing to even try getting hard. He could not push Gray away, and he could not stop his bladder from pouring out. He was helpless … so utterly powerless. The humiliation made the heat of shame intensify.

He heard Gray swallow down the piss and growl deep in his throat. "God, you really are burning hot. That's like drinking piping kettle water. Tastes disgusting." Then he leaned back up and continued to jerk off with a rapid wrist, leaning over a little so the piss shot onto his own cock, moistening it, burning it with hot liquid. "So dirty. So disgusting. So … fucking … hot. Oh God!"

With a grunt, he came, and the white streams mixed with the yellow piss still coming out, mixing atop of Natsu's torso. Gray hung his head in relief, but as he looked down, he saw the liquid still pouring.

"You're not done?"

"A-almost," Natsu whispered.

"That's seriously a lot of piss."

"Shut up," he mumbled in shame.

Yet it kept going. When he thought he must be done, it kept leaking, not even with pressure to squeeze it out. He wanted it to stop already, but it kept going. He wanted to curl into a ball and sob like a child, like a naughty little boy who had peed the bed. But it wouldn't stop. It wouldn't end. Seriously, how much had he drank today?

At last, the stream came to a light trickle. It kept dribbling, warm and smelly urine dripping over his thigh, across his narrow hips, and pooling under his butt, soaking away into the sheets and mattress in a warm, disgusting puddle. Natsu wanted all of it out, and he pressed with his abdominal muscles. His cock sprang and shot a bit more, but that one movement made his low back hurt. He teased up at the pain.

Gray's hand rested tenderly on the Dragon Slayer's chest. "Natsu, are you all right?"

Suddenly, a memory returned to Natsu.


"Natsu," came the basso, rumbling voice of his adopted father. "Are you all right, son?"

He must have been no more than five, just a scrawny boy wearing clothes that were too big for him, something Igneel had pilfered off the clothesline of a farmhouse. His baggy pants hung heavily with wetness. A dark stain spread all over his crotch and dripped down his legs. He sat in the middle of a puddle of piss, crying into his arms, knowing he was going to get into big trouble. These were the pants Igneel gave him, and he had pissed in them.

"I'm sorry," he wailed. "I tried to hold it. I really did, but you were gone and I didn't wanna go out there alone, not after … after … that time. I … I was scared." Confessing that made his tears bubble out more. He clutched at his massive white scarf, his one protection from the scary things. "I was scared," he sobbed.

"I know, Natsu. I'm sorry I was gone for so long. Something … bad happened. It's okay now. I took care of it, and now I'll take care of you. Get out of those pants and leave them there. Come out of the cave and follow me to the river."

Tiny Natsu snuffled up his snotty nose, undid the pants, and let them fall into the reeking puddle. He walked out naked, not ashamed since it was only him and Igneel. He followed the massive red dragon to a stream that ran by the cave where they lived, and he let the flowing water clean away the filth.

"See, we'll wash you, so it's okay this time. Don't worry, Natsu. Your father will protect you. It's all right."


The memory faded. He was in a wet bed reeking of fresh urine, with Gray smothering him, grabbing Natsu's shivering body.

"You did good, Natsu. You held it as long as you could. It was just an accident."

Igneel's voice echoed in his ears. "It was just an accident. I'll clean you up."

Gray raised, looked down at Natsu, and wiped the tear tracks that traced down his flushed cheeks. Seeing this level of humiliation was so arousing, he almost had an urge to ravish Natsu right here, in a urine-soaked bed. However, coming three times in under twenty-four hours … seriously, if Gray wasn't a strapping, virile, horny-as-hell nineteen-year-old, he would probably be spent for a whole week.

"I'll clean you up," he whispered, unknowingly mimicking the gentle, parental tenderness in Natsu's memory.

Suddenly, Natsu felt like that little child again, a helpless child who wet himself because he was too scared to go outside on his own. He began to cry all over again.

"Father," Natsu whispered. "I'm sorry."

Gray was momentarily stunned, but he knew what was happening. Reverting to childhood: it sometimes happened in BDSM, a common issue. Gray tenderly stroked back the pink hair. "It's okay, Natsu. You did well."

"Gray," he sighed as the memory and the reality bled into one another. "I … I pissed the bed," he sobbed. "You told me not to. You told me … to hold it."

"Yes, I did. I said I would spank you if you didn't. That can wait. Let's get you washed. Can you stand?"

The ice on Natsu's wrists evaporated, and Gray unlocked the handcuffs. Natsu tried to sit, but the ache in his bladder was pure agony. He grabbed his lower stomach and gritted his teeth to hold back any moans.

"It really … seriously hurts," he warned.

"I'm sorry if it was too much," Gray whispered, giving Natsu some help. As the teen rose to his feet, his knees nearly gave way. "Easy. Up you go. Slowly now. Let's walk to the bathroom. I'll clean you."

Memories of Igneel washing him in the stream returned. Natsu recalled that those pants had somehow been washed too, although Igneel usually just burned any old clothes. That one time, the fire dragon had somehow washed the pants, knowing Natsu would feel worse if the clothes were ruined because of his incontinence.

Now again, Gray was taking extra care to attend him. Since the shower was still running, he helped Natsu inside to let the urine wash away. Gray grabbed a bath sponge and soap provided by the hotel, and he began to scrub Natsu's body, gently cleaning the stomach, hips, thighs, and wherever the urine might have touched. He knelt in front of Natsu, not washing erotically—they were both too drained for that—but wanting to take some responsibility for putting the Dragon Slayer through that humiliation.

Natsu stood there, watching the attentiveness with blank eyes as his brain tried to recover from the emotional overload. "You have one weird kink," he muttered.

Gray's rubbing faltered as he looked up at that weary face. Maybe he should have just watched Natsu pee into the toilet, or had him piss himself in the shower. Going this far on their very first venture into omorashi and watersports was likely too much. He would not be surprised if it completely turned Natsu off from the idea.

Gray's head dropped back down. He was eye level with Natsu's cock, and he looked at how cute it was limp and hanging so wearily. His conscience stabbed him at being so abusive to this poor, untrained penis, tormenting it so much. Still, Gray could hardly help it. He had been Natsu's rival for so long, hearing him whine and beg was tantalizing. Still, as a Dominant, he had to put that rivalry aside. He could be sadistic, but he should not be plain cruel.

"How is your stomach?" he asked in concern.

"Sore. If I tense my lower muscles at all, it's painful."

"I'm really sorry. For the next three days, as soon as you get an urge to pee, get to the bathroom immediately. Don't try to hold it in. Drink a lot of water too." Gray hugged Natsu around the legs, leaning in tenderly to his lower stomach and resting his cheek there, wishing he could ease away all the pain he put Natsu through. "I'm really sorry," he repeated in a whisper.

Then he felt fingers in his wet hair. When he looked up, Natsu was stroking his head with a tiny smile. It was enough to lift Gray's spirits. He had not completely broken Natsu.

"Will you want to do it again?" The words blurted out, and immediately Gray wished he had held back. Right after a BDSM scene, both would be in an emotionally altered state. Natsu's answer might be affected by that hormonal turmoil, and if he said no here, he might concrete in his mind that what just happened was a bad thing, not a good thing.

Natsu had to admit, for all the humiliation, the relief had been incredible. "Maybe," he whispered. "Not any time soon."

"No, you shouldn't do that too often. You'll wind up with a urinary tract infection. Those can be nasty."

Gray was glad that at least Natsu was not utterly repulsed. He knew that a fetish for pissing was really hardcore, and most people found the whole thing repulsive rather than arousing. He had to go easier, slowly build up to more.

He had been too eager all day, giddy with the prospect of exploring his fetishes. Despite that, he had to take Natsu's needs, wants, and desires into consideration, first and foremost. That was the duty of the Dominant, and the most important rule was to always, always, be in control. That meant having control over himself before he could even think about being in control of his Submissive.

His duty right now was to ensure Natsu regained emotional stability and to tend to any physical pains. Gray stood back up, ready to be in control once again.

"Let's have you soak in the tub. It should help."

Gray started a bathtub of extra hot water, how he figured Natsu would like it, and helped the Dragon Slayer in. The heat made the pain in his lower stomach soothe away. Gray stayed beside the tub, crouched on the floor, watching Natsu, waiting to find out what he needed to do next. He had thought Natsu might use this moment to guilt him into doing anything at all; instead, Natsu leaned back in the tub and stared ahead, still processing what happened.

"Did that really turn you on?" he asked quietly.

Gray sat on his heels and stared at that dazed face. "It did. A lot. Just thinking about you needing to pee … it turns me on. I don't know why. It just does. That's why I had to leave the room and take a shower. I was getting overwhelmed, and I didn't want to humiliate you too much. If I had stayed there, watching you twist around … I don't know what I would have done, but I'd've probably hurt you. I didn't want that. Not this time."

"You … wanted more?" Natsu whispered.

Gray wondered if he should actually confess this. Then again, in a relationship like this, honesty was vital. "What I really want to try is pounding into your ass when you have a full bladder. I've only heard about it, never tried it, but supposedly it's way more intense for you and more tight for me."

Thinking about that tingling pressure at the same time as Gray filled him made Natsu squirm, and his hand drifted down to the aroused cock under the bath water.

"Ah, that happens too," Gray noticed. "Holding it that long puts pressure on the prostate, so releasing that pressure…"

"It was almost as good as coming," Natsu finished with a dazed voice. "Only, the feeling lasted a lot longer. Ya know, like when you come, you feel it for … what, twenty seconds? That, though … that just kept on going. Damn." He was lightly stroking himself now, but only to relieve the ache.

"Exactly. But what I really want to try," Gray whispered in a dark voice, "is to have you bang me with your bladder ready to burst. You can't piss when you're aroused, so you have to go fast. You'll be driven on by pure desperation, needing so badly to piss, but too hard to let it out. You know you need to work it off fast before your bladder totally bursts. You'll pound in fast, screaming with how desperate you are for your release, crying from the pain in your belly, and when you finally do come, it'll feel so good, way more intense. Right afterward, as soon at the tightness in your balls releases a bit, you'll piss so hard, still inside me. You'll fill my ass with cum, then flush it all up into me with your piss. That's something I've always wanted to try. Rather than just a spoonful of spunk, you'd fill me with a whole bladder full of your liquid."

Natsu shifted in the tub and scowled. "That … probably isn't something I can do," he muttered hesitantly. "The whole my cum can't be in something issue, ya know."

"Oh," Gray realized, admittedly a little disappointed. "Well, you know, if you do it that way—coming in me but then pissing—you'd destroy all the semen."

Natsu's eyes widened, and he swung his head over. "What?" he asked with a shiver.

For a moment, Gray wondered if he was about to freak out, but then he realized that the hand Natsu had under the water was jerking harder. "The acid in the urine would kill any sperm you have in there. It'd destroy the semen."

A hesitant but ecstatic smile twitched on Natsu's face. His eyes were wild with glee. "It'd … destroy it? Destroy all the sperm? The cum would be useless?"

Useless?

With shivering arousal, Natsu whispered, "I wanna try that some day. Pissing in your ass. I think, if we did it that way, maybe I could come inside you."

"Then we'll do it another time."

Gray felt a flush over his whole body. Natsu was actually willing to try one of his wildest, most hardcore fantasies. Despite how happy he was to hear that Natsu was game for more adventure into watersports, that one word troubled him. Useless…? Was that part of his issue?

"You do realize, cum is useless to a man anyway. I can't get pregnant."

"Idiot, of course I know that, but you can still … you can—" Natsu gulped down the words and looked away sharply. "You wouldn't though. I know that. Dammit, I know that."

Gray realized the hand below stopped stroking. He's losing himself in the past again. God, did some lady try to force him to give her babies? I can imagine Juvia attempting that, but who would do that to a flame-brain like Natsu?

"Whatever it is, I'm probably not even interested," Gray mumbled cautiously.

"I know. Dammit, I wish I could just tell you."

Gray wished that too. It would make knowing what he could and couldn't do so much easier. "Did you promise not to?"

"Not exactly. I just … can't tell anyone. They … they said it'd … be better … if no one knew—"

Icy fury crackled in Gray's eyes. "The bastard who did that to you told you that?"

Natsu looked up in surprise. "No. Makarov did."

Gray jolted back. Master Makarov? That meant the guild master knew about Natsu's past, whatever this trauma was. Why the hell would Makarov tell Natsu to keep it a secret? Seriously, what happened?

Natsu grimaced with anger. "I don't want anyone to know that … that I … did that." He shivered and pulled his knees up to his chest. "I don't even like to think about it. It still gives me nightmares. All the blood—" His voice faded away.

"Blood?"

Definitely, this was some huge trauma, probably violent in nature. But who was the violent one? What if the fault was actually on Natsu? Dozens of possibilities swarmed Gray's worried mind, everything from Natsu was raped to Natsu was the one who raped someone. In every scenario, Gray knew only one certainty: no matter what had happened, he wanted to stay with Natsu and keep doing what they were doing. If he could possibly help Natsu overcome his trauma, that would be great; however, at the least, Gray wanted to be the one who accepted Natsu's past and still stayed by his side.

"Natsu, you can trust me," Gray said, feeling sad that, after all this intimacy, Natsu still felt he could not confide in him.

"I want to tell you," Natsu muttered into his drawn up knees. "I can't yet. Maybe someday. Just don't make me think about it yet."

How could he possibly help Natsu not think about something Gray didn't know? It was so frustrating, but Gray still wanted to help. He yanked Natsu over in the bathwater, pulling him out of the fetal position he had curled into, and hugged around those warm shoulders.

"I don't want your cum, Natsu. I want only to pleasure you, to torment you, humiliate you, make you cry for me, make you beg for more, and then comfort you afterward, care for you, wash you up, pamper you like my fiery prince." He leaned over, kissed Natsu's wet neck, and leaned up to his ear. "Even if you gave me your cum, I'd pour it out. Or maybe I'd swallow it. Even if you came in my ass, I'd shit it out. A few drops of fluid aren't interesting to me. It's watching you build up to that moment of release, watching you be aroused, listening to you whimper and cry. Not your cum, but your pleasure, and I'll milk that out any way I can," he growled softly. "If I have to beat you, whip you, torture you, make you desperate, make you hurt, humiliate you to tears, whatever it takes to siphon all that pleasure out of you, I'll do it. I'm greedy, and I want it all." He glanced down at the erection trying to poke through the surface of the bath water. "You're hard again just thinking about it."

"I was hard before, idiot."

"Do you want me to take care of that?"

Natsu flinched. He had denied himself release earlier, so he felt he really did need it this time. However, his body felt weak from the violent struggle to hold back his bladder and the emotional upheaval.

"Nothing kinky this time," Gray promised. "We don't have to be kinky. Just a plain blowjob should be enough. I promise to swallow it too. Sit on the edge of the tub."

Natsu rose out of the water and swung his legs over, sitting on the ledge. Gray knelt between his legs and caressed the needy shaft while smiling up at Natsu.

"You really are something, you flame-brain idiot."

"Oh? And what am I?"

"I dunno…" Gray kissed the cockhead, mouthed gentle sucks down the veined length, and admired the pearl drop leaking on the slitted top with a sparkle in his silver-blue eyes. "…but I wanna figure it out." He opened his mouth and slipped down the shaft all in one go.

Natsu hissed and clenched the side of the tub. Gray definitely had a talent with his mouth. His fingers were cold, callused, and they dug into Natsu's butt cheeks as he let just his mouth do the work. His lips were tight, his tongue curled around the underside of the head, and his throat took on the pounding as he bobbed down as far as he could without deep-throating. Natsu's fists clenched so hard against the tub, he heard a crack.

"Gray, restrain me."

The black-haired young man pulled up with saliva and pre-cum on his lips. "You're damn lucky I'm an ice wizard and can bind you on a whim." He grabbed Natsu's wrists and frosted them over, trapping Natsu to the rim of the tub. "Is that good enough?"

The Dragon Slayer nodded frantically. So long as he was restrained … so long as he couldn't use his hands … so long as he couldn't reach out and hurt the person pleasuring him…

Gray now sucked and used one hand to stroke the lower half of the cock, while his other hand reached around and slipped inside Natsu's tight hole, fingering his ass until he found the prostate. The Dragon Slayer cried out at that, and one leg suddenly crashed down in an attack-style kick. His heel rammed into Gray's back, making him cry out around the cock and pull off angrily.

"What the hell?" Gray shouted.

Natsu cringed guiltily. "I'm sorry. Instinct. Restrain my legs too."

With pain-fueled anger, Gray roughly yanked Natsu's thighs apart wider, gripped his ankles tight enough to leave bruises, and froze Natsu's feet to the bottom of the tub. "There. Now you can't fuckin' kick out my kidney."

"Yes…" Natsu hissed in pleasure. "Can't move. Can't fight. Can't do anything." He suddenly sneered down at Gray with a flame dancing on his skin. "Don't you dare touch me, bastard."

However, Gray heard the purr of lust hidden behind the words. This was not like earlier when Natsu demanded to be released from the handcuffs. His face was totally different. This was him starting on that journey he had to mentally travel, thinking he was being forced so that he could release. As Gray ignored the protesting threat and sucked on him, he began to piece together what little bits he knew about this complex pyromaniac.

Natsu did not want to be called boy. Could that be because the trauma happened in his youth? Whatever this trauma was, Makarov told Natsu to keep it a secret. That was truly perplexing, and if the tiny guild master felt the guild should not know about this issue, then directly asking Makarov about Natsu's past was out of the question.

He mentioned that his trauma included blood. Had it been Natsu's blood, or someone else's? He did not want anything gagging him, nothing restricting his air, and even touching his neck could trigger reactions. Kissing and gentle fondling were okay, but there was some invisible threshold where he flipped, attacking the one touching him. At that point, Natsu demanded to be tied up. He didn't trust himself. The ache in Gray's kidney showed that the demand was probably because Natsu knew he reacted violently to anything too sexually stimulating.

He demanded his semen to be swallowed, not spit. He could not allow his semen to be in any form of receptacle, and even the thought of it led to panic attacks. This included anal sex, condoms, some sex toys, and although Gray did not bother with asking directly, he guessed this included semen inside a vagina, probably to panic-inducing levels. That was the most confusing part of this. Natsu could be romantically attracted to either men or women, but he was not okay with ejaculation, or at least he had a lot of restrictions. He was afraid his semen might wind up in something.

He liked orgasm denial, and if he was going to orgasm then he had to indulge himself in a rape fantasy. He needed to fight against the impending orgasm. As he had put it on their first time together, "I can't lose control. You have to take it. You have to force it out of me." However, when Gray said 'I'm gonna make you come' last night while just touching Natsu, that increased the level of pleasure, yet when he said the same thing tonight with Natsu's penis inside of him, it evoked a massive panic attack. The pieces to this puzzle were falling into place, but something did not add up.

"Gray! Gray … nngh … Gray."

Natsu kept saying his name, over and over. Gray glanced up and saw in his face, Natsu was not chanting his name to be erotic. He was repeating it to remind himself who he was with, to reassure himself that this would be okay. Gray decided to test something. He pulled off the cock and only rubbed it with his hand.

"I'm gonna make you come, Natsu." He observed a slight flinch, but not on the same level as before. "I'm gonna swallow it down. All of it. I won't let a single drop stay behind." A definite change now happened, with Natsu shivering and the tension loosening. "I'll force you to give me every last drop. I won't let you hold back. There is no way you can fight me, no way you can escape. You're my own little sex slave, so I can use you however I want…" That brought up a harsh flinch. "…and right now, I want you to feed me. I'm gonna use your cum as my dinner."

"No, don't eat it." There was a small smile on Natsu's face that showed, behind the struggles, he was enjoying this idea.

"I'll swallow it all down, let my stomach acids dissolve all of it, digest that filthy cum of yours, and tomorrow I'll shit it out."

"Oh God," Natsu cried out, and the cock in Gray's hand surged, twitching with need.

Gray made some mental notes. Telling Natsu he was going to force ejaculation only worked if Natsu knew the cum was going to be out, as he put it, or swallowed. The idea of sex slavery was toeing some invisible line; that was something they would have to discuss later, perhaps as a subcategory under roleplay. However, the thought of destroying semen really turned Natsu on. Gray had no idea what a sexual fantasy like that was called—maybe a form of spermatophobia?—but he could definitely work with that.

"Your cum isn't good for anything but shit," Gray snarled.

Natsu's head arched up as he screamed in a surge of erotic delight. "Yes. Eat it. Crap it out. Dissolve it."

My complex little dragon! Gray quickly devoured Natsu's cock again, determined to do just as he promised.

Natsu shook his head back and forth. This was Gray. Gray would swallow, he had promised that much. He would swallow it all down. Still, mentally he wanted to hold back. He did not want to release. He wanted to break free. He yanked on the ice cuffing his ankles, trying to squeeze his knees together to stop this … this … rape.

Yes, rape! He's forcing me again. I have no control. I'm tied up. I'm helpless. Nobody is coming to rescue me. They don't know I'm here. No one knows. I'm alone, and he's forcing me to do this. I can't stop him.

"Stop," he sobbed, but Gray ignored him. "Stop it … no. I don't want to. Someone … anyone. Help me!"

Hearing those screams made Gray's heart pound. Instinctively, he wanted to come to Natsu's rescue, but he knew this was all part of the fantasy. Natsu was placing himself as the victim, helpless to resist.

"Stop!" Natsu shrieked as his hips thrust on their own will. "No. Stop already. God, someone, help!"

Seriously, if we were at my house and he screamed this loudly, I'd have the police at my door in minutes.

Gray forced himself to continue. Natsu knew the safewords. He had used both now. He knew how to stop this if the scene was truly too much to mentally handle. This was, in a way, a form of roleplay. Natsu was the rape victim, Gray was the rapist. Struggling when you were powerless brought a whole new level of arousal. For Gray, being aggressive and forceful was frighteningly erotic.

Gray pulled up and gazed at him. "Do you like this, brat? Your cock is leaking in my mouth. Such a slut! You love being ravaged, don't you?"

"No," Natsu sobbed, yet Gray dived down and sucked hard, hollowing his cheeks as he pulled back. "Oh God, please, don't rape me. I'm serious, stop it. Stop," he screamed, but Gray bobbed faster on him. "Oh, fuck … no…" Natsu whined as his already-aching stomach muscles burned from the coiling. "I won't give in to you. You can't make me. You … you can't…" His head swung back as he screamed to the ceiling, "Nooooo!"

Then Natsu doubled over, and his teeth crunched down into Gray's shoulder. Gray screamed, and because of that, the first spurt choke down his opened throat. Despite the pain of those teeth clenched on his skin, he kept his mouth firm as Natsu released the buildup of over half a day of play, although not as thick as he had been the night before.

Gray waited, feeling the little pulses after the main rupture. Then slowly, Natsu's jaw released, and Gray felt the hot dribble of blood snaking from his shoulder down his back. When he could pull back, he sucked everything up, and he swallowed before fully pulling off, that way Natsu could feel him gulp it all down.

"Oh God, Gray," he moaned in exhaustion.

Finally, Gray pulled back, and the limp cock flopped down, still dripping a little, but those tiny droplets fell to the bathroom tile. Gray sat back on his heels and gazed up at the glowing, overwhelmed face.

"Are you okay?" he asked in worry.

Natsu had a weak and satisfied smile. "Better than okay. Damn, that mouth of yours is talented."

Gray crawled forward and embraced the burning hot body.

"Wh-what are you doing?" Natsu cried out.

"What the hell does it look like? I'm cuddling you. You need that afterward, right?"

He laughed wryly. "How touching! You remembered."

"Shut up. I want to remember everything you need, every wish, every desire."

"I'll remember your needs too. Right now, while my blood is on a high, you need that shoulder healed. Release me." The ice vanished, Natsu shook out his freed hands, and then he hugged Gray back. "Thank you. I'm sorry if shouting those things troubles you."

"I don't like thinking I'm a rapist."

Natsu pouted guiltily. "I know…"

Gray caressed his cheek. "But I do like ravaging you," he said with a low, sultry voice.

Natsu's eyes lit up at that.

"Just don't say the word rape," Gray warned. "I know I say it when I'm taunting you, but hearing you say it…" He flinched a little. That had truly troubled his conscience. "Think it in your head if you have to, but don't say it to me. That part right there made me feel bad. But the rest of it … I feel guilty for admitting it, but I like to get forceful with you. It feels like our normal fights, except that I get to see you cry."

"Bastard," Natsu growled with a hard glare, yet he felt intense relief at hearing that. "Thank you, really. I thought I'd never find someone who'd…"

"Shut up and heal my shoulder before I pass out from blood loss."

Natsu leaned over and began to lick at the bloody punctures. His spit, laced with dragon hormones that could heal his lover, made the wounds from the sharp canines disappear, and the skin grew over as if it never occurred. However, this time Natsu left a bruise, since Gray had complained about not having that before.

"Sorry about the shoulder. You have blood down your back, so now you need a bath too."

"How about a shower? It's quicker."

They washed each other off in the shower. Natsu eyed the bruise marking his lover. He paused every other minute to nuzzle that bruise, grab around Gray's body, and cuddle him under the heat of the dripping water. Instead of the sponge, Gray used his hands to clean up the semen mess on Natsu's groin. Natsu blushed at those nearly erotic touches. Gray cleaned his genitals with tenderness, knowing how he cleaned himself in that highly sensitive area.

Natsu grabbed the shampoo bottle, squeezed some into his hand, and rubbed it through Gray's raven strands. They were so slick in the water, and the suds built up quickly. When a little soap began to drip toward Gray's eyebrow, Natsu swiped it away with his finger. Gray gazed silently as Natsu washed his hair. No one had ever done something like this. It was … weird. Weird, but good. Feeling Natsu's hot fingers scratching into his scalp was so nice. Then Natsu turned Gray closer to the shower head, and he rinsed out the suds.

"A mate cleans up the mess, and the dragon protects the mate," Natsu mumbled into Gray's skin while kissing his collar and racking his nails through the last bits of his scalp.

"What was that?" he asked over the hiss of the shower water.

"Something I think Igneel told me." Now it was Gray's turn. He was faster, running the shampoo through Natsu's hair and barely giving any scrubbing before turning the shower head to wash it all away. Natsu hummed at the pleasant feeling. "What happens when both mates want to clean and protect?"

Gray walked around to face Natsu. "Does there have to be set roles?"

The Dragon Slayer smirked, and he suddenly forced Gray up against the wet tile wall. "Nope," he answered, and he forced a rough, hungry kiss. Gray reached around, grabbed Natsu's ass in a bruising grip, and yanked those hot hips closer against him. Natsu's hands rubbed over Gray's wet torso, up to his dripping shoulders. Then suddenly, he clawed sharply down Gray's chest. The ice wizard shouted in pain as the nails left ten bright pink stripes down his body.

"The hell ya doing?" he shouted.

"Marking you more," Natsu stated as if it was obvious. He took a step back to admire the clawed skin. Dots of blood were rising just under the surface on some of the stripes. Most would fade before morning, but the harsher scratch marks would puff up into welts. Every time Gray removed his shirt, he would show off that bruise on his neck and the scratches on his chest … marked by a dragon. "I think we're done showering."

They left the steamy shower, dried off, but when they stepped back out to the main room, Natsu smelled the reek of urine. He had wanted to snuggle on the bed, but he flushed as he remembered the mess he made earlier.

"Still need cuddled?" Gray asked as he began to dress.

"Kinda," Natsu admitted, pulling his own clothes on.

Gray came forward and wrapped the white scarf around Natsu's neck. The Dragon Slayer touched the familiar fabric, and he looked up in surprise to see that Gray had done such an intimate thing. No other man but Igneel had ever wrapped the scaly muffler around him. Gray's fingers drifted along the hot, damp skin until he reached the day-old love bruise on Natsu's neck. He traced it with his finger, then adjusted the scarf to help Natsu hide that sign of their kinkiness.

"My house is closer. Stay the night," the ice wizard offered, walking away to finish finding his clothes. "I don't mind if you have to leave early, either. I know Happy probably is worried. Two nights in a row! Oh, and Natsu?" Gray was mostly clothed now, so he faced the Dragon Slayer solidly. He reached forward, rubbed down Natsu's arm, until he got to the callused hands. He took the fingers in his grip and squeezed them. "Will you go out with me?"

He raised his eyebrows in shock, and then he laughed softly. "I thought answering your damn Checklist of Fucking gave you that answer."

"It told me you want to be exclusive. It didn't tell me if you want to be my boyfriend."

"And you wanna be boyfriends?"

"I wouldn't have asked otherwise."

Natsu turned aside, trying to hide how happy hearing Gray ask this made him. He nonchalantly continued to button up his clothes. "Sure, we can give being boyfriends a shot. We're pretty good in the sex department, so let's see how we are with dating."

Gray took hold of Natsu's chin and turned his face back up to him. "You're cute when you blush."

Those narrow eyes gazed back harshly. "I will punch your goddamn face."

"Even cuter when you try to act all tough."

"I'm not acting, bastard. I told you, I hate being called sweet names. I really will punch you if you dare call me cute again."

"Is that a hard limit?" teased Gray.

"Hell yeah."

"Then what if I say you're handsome?"

The glower vanished, and Natsu stared in shock. He tried to turn away again as his cheeks went red, but Gray still had hold of his chin.

"My handsome boyfriend," Gray sighed. He leaned in and gave Natsu a gentle, lingering kiss.

Natsu smiled up at him. "I love you, Gray."

The ice wizard blinked, stunned. He wanted to say the words back. They rose to his lips so naturally, but something held them back. Instead, he smiled as a way to receive those emotions and leaned in for another kiss.

As his lips pressed against that cold mouth, Natsu remembered that Gray had warned him, he didn't say I love you unless he really meant it, and then he would not say it often. Natsu realized he had no right to demand Gray should say something he was uncomfortable saying. He saw in that pale face and felt in the tight embrace, Gray returned his emotions. Maybe he still had to sort out for himself if this was mere lust or actual love, so Natsu would give him time.

It seemed both of them had personal demons to battle.

"Wanna try a date?" Natsu offered impetuously.

"Now?" Gray asked in surprise. "It's almost midnight."

"There's a 24-hour café not far. They have good cake and ice cream. It's midnight, so it'd be a good time to try a date, since we don't have to be overly paranoid about our friends seeing us together."

"Yeah, but if anyone sees us two, of all people, together eating dessert at midnight, it'd be suspicious."

"It … was just an idea," he muttered sadly.

That pout was so adorable, Gray had to lean in and capture it with his lips. "I'd love to, but I'm kinda out of money now."

"Oh hell no, my treat," Natsu insisted stubbornly. "If we're on a date, I'm paying. You can pay for hotels and kinky crap, but I'm taking charge when it comes to dating."

Gray laughed at the determination in his face. Natsu had his pride, after all. He might have to take the submissive position in sex, purely because of his issues, but he would take the alpha role in romance. "Fine, but that means I'm finding the biggest goddamn bowl of ice cream they serve and I'm not sharing it."

"Greedy bastard. Fine, but I'm ordering a lava cake, and you can't have a single bite."

"I'll just steal a bite from you."

"Try, and I'll smash your face into the ice cream."

Laughing, they left the hotel room and walked down the hallway. With nervous hesitation, Natsu reached over and held Gray's hand as they walked toward the elevators. Gray squeezed his fingers back and traced his thumb over the roughened knuckles. The elevator opened, the two walked in, and as the doors slid shut, Natsu leaned over to give Gray a peck on the cheek.

Maybe dating a Dragon Slayer wouldn't be so bad after all.

Chapter Text

When Gray woke up in his own bed, there was no sign of Natsu. Still, unlike the previous morning, he had no doubt that last night really happened. He touched a divot in the pillow beside him and smiled to himself.

Who in a million years would have thought he and Natsu would become a couple? It still felt unreal, but Gray was glad it had happened. He felt that Natsu needed someone like him, a person who could handle his complexities and keep his secrets. He definitely needed someone like Natsu, who could handle some sadistic pain play and still want more. Gray was usually too scared to do that with a girl, but he knew he could not hurt Natsu too badly. Not physically, at least.

Mentally … well, that was something they still had to work out. Both of them.

As Gray got up and stretched, he thought about the previous night. After they left the love hotel, Natsu took him out for ice cream, although it was after midnight. They had stayed pretty much silent the whole time, with nervousness tingling the air between them. In the midst of that awkwardness, Natsu had reached across the table and held Gray's hand. It was a move only lovers did. The waitress saw, and Gray heard her giggle. It made him blush, but Natsu merely squeezed his cold fingers even tighter, as if to tell Gray that he did not care if people thought it was weird.

On the walk home, Natsu had suggested an alternate route. They had walked along one of the canals that ran through Magnolia, through deserted streets lit by the moon and streetlights. They held hands most of the time, but Natsu always let go just seconds before someone came by, usually to scratch his scalp or rub out his neck. After the fifth time scratching his pink hair, Gray guessed Natsu was sniffing out other people, keeping their little intimate touches a secret. That was oddly sweet of him.

Then Natsu walked Gray home, they stripped to their underwear, and Natsu cuddled Gray throughout the night. The ice wizard had woken up a few times, stifled by the heat pressed up against him, only to feel Natsu's hold tighten possessively. Each time, it made him smile, relax, and he could drift off to sleep once again.

Now he was alone. He guessed Natsu woke up early and went to check on Happy, maybe make the Exceed some breakfast. He still felt the lingering heat in the bedroom, which was much warmer than the rest of his cold home. As Gray made breakfast, he hoped Natsu was okay. Not just physically—although belting him would probably hurt for a day or two—but mentally. Natsu had issues, and as much as Gray wanted to know what he was dealing with, if Natsu was not ready to tell him, he had to respect that.

Still, as he munched his cereal, he stared off and let the previous nights' events run through his head. The last two days were so surreal. He almost could not believe it had happened.

After all, this was Natsu. They were rivals. He never would have thought Natsu would be a masochist, let alone submissive.

A part of him still wondered if this was all one huge, elaborate prank, but Natsu would never let Gray hit him with a belt if it was a joke. Plus the panic attack Natsu had was way too real. It almost seemed like another person, but the anger he showed for a brief moment was totally him. That face when he snarled "Release me, you sick bastard" was definitely the look Natsu gave to enemies.

Which made the whole thing even more surreal. Natsu could go from whimpering to growling, from timid to voracious, and from cutely innocent to warmly romantic, all in the blink of an eye. It was like he had two personalities.

Considering the rest of his mental issues, Gray would not be the least bit surprised if that might also be the case. Not that Natsu had two completely different personalities and one did not know what the other was doing. Just that there was normal Natsu, and then there was bedroom-Natsu. In the bedroom, Natsu had issues that made him need to be suppressed, tied up, confined, and he was so naive that he had to be told what to do. Outside of the bedroom, Natsu was … well, Natsu. A surprisingly romantic guy, but still a bit immature, loyal and watchful, argumentative and stubborn, playful and innocent.

Gray knew he faced a challenge sorting out a guy this complex, but if the past couple days were any indication, he figured his efforts would be worth it if he could do this level of bondage with Natsu.

Gray washed up, dressed, and headed to the guild. Part of him felt a slight dread about how he and Natsu would face one another after a night like that. Two people did not wildly fuck one another and then simply wave hello with a casual smile the next day. He also wondered if anyone saw them when they were on their date. Natsu had a point about keeping things secret. Gray still had scratch marks on his chest from where Natsu clawed him in the shower.

God, that had been hot!

Gray forced himself not to think about that because he would only get aroused.

"Gray-sama."

And there went his boner.

He cringed as Juvia bounced up and grabbed his arm. Seriously, how many times did he have to tell this woman that he was not interested?

"Gray-sama, Juvia wants to go on a mission."

"Then go on one," he replied frigidly.

"Juvia wants to take a hard one."

"You're strong. You can handle it."

She pouted stubbornly and told him outright, "Juvia wants to go on a mission with Gray-sama."

"Not interested." He swiftly pulled away from her grip, letting her take his shirt along with her. Now missing his top, he walked over to the bar. "Hey, Mira. Something cold to drink."

"Gray, what happened? Did you fight a vicious beast?"

"Huh?" He looked down and saw the scratch marks. He let out a light curse and ran back over to Juvia. Her eyes lit up with hopefulness; however, he yanked his shirt away from her hands and tugged it back on. Stupid flame-brain, marking him like that!

Lucy walked in while he was still buttoning his shirt. Gray eyed her, thinking back a couple nights. Natsu had first gone to Lucy's place when he had that nightmare. If Loke had not been with her, apparently busy in an act that would make Natsu horny—and Gray could guess what that meant—then Natsu never would have gone to Gray's home that night, and he would not have been in that sort of mood. Gray might have to thank Loke some day.

"Good morning, Gray," she called out cheerfully.

Behind him, he heard Juvia hiss, "Love rival!"

"Hey, Lucy," Gray said with a placid smile. "Have you been busy?"

She blushed, and Juvia seethed, and chanting like a curse, Love rival, love rival. "Busy, yeah," Lucy muttered. "I've been … training. Extensively."

"Cool. Maybe you can call Loke out and we can spar." He loved how that blush went crimson at the mention of Loke's name. Those two were totally banging all weekend.

"Oh, I guess so, but not today. I … um … that is…"

"Ah, you kept him busy … with training," Gray said, and he watched as the crimson on her face went almost maroon.

Lucy laughed nervously. "Yes, w-with training."

Mira looked over at them. "Do you need an iced drink, Lucy? You're looking feverish. I hope you're not coming down with whatever Natsu has."

Gray jolted at that, left behind Juvia's seething jealousy, and hurried to the bar. "What Natsu has?" he repeated. "What's wrong with him?"

"I'm not sure, really," said Mira. "Happy came here early this morning and said Natsu was feverish, and he wanted some hot soup. He said Natsu was out for two nights in a row. I wonder if he's sneaking out to see a girlfriend."

Lucy laughed at that. "Natsu, with a girlfriend? That's impossible."

"Oh?" Mira asked slyly. "Are you jealous, Lucy?"

"Not in the slightest."

Gray left their conversation and rushed out of the guild. Natsu was sick? Why didn't he wake Gray up, if he was feeling ill? Or had he sneaked away so he would not bother Gray with his illness?

That sounded like Natsu, all right. He hated to show any sort of weakness.

Gray made a stop at the store. Natsu would need tea, and probably medicine for a fever, and…

"Ah shit," he muttered as something dawned on him. An old lady passing by him in the store aisle smacked her umbrella across Gray's head for cussing. He flinched and rubbed out the hit. "Sorry, ma'am." He hurried on and made sure not to cuss in public again, although now his mind was whirling.

He had forced Natsu to hold his bladder to the point of wetting himself. There was a danger in that sort of play. A person could easily get a bladder infection if they were not properly hydrated. He bought a few extra items in case that was the issue. Then he rushed out of town and into the woods where Natsu and Happy lived together.

When he knocked on the door to their rickety house, Happy answered.

"Whoa, Gray! Why are you here? Natsu is sick; he can't fight with you."

"I heard. I brought some stuff that might help."

"Oh." Happy looked confused by the act of kindness. "Well, we just ran out of toilet paper and I was about to go to the store. Don't fight with Natsu. He's really feverish and can barely get out of bed. Do you know where Natsu was last night?"

"You could ask him," Gray said cautiously.

"I did, and he just said he was out, but he was gone all night, and he was gone most of the previous night too, and he won't say where, and he's being really secretive."

"How should I know what that flame-brain does?" Gray grumbled to get out of answering.

"Well, just watch over things. There's a kettle on the stove if he needs something to drink." Happy took a pouch of money and flew off toward town.

Gray put the bag of goods in the kitchen and walked over to Natsu's bedroom. When he entered, the pink-haired Dragon Slayer was curled up in bed. Natsu rolled over, and his eyes widened at seeing Gray standing there. Then they narrowed spitefully.

"Why are you here?" he mumbled.

Gray ignored the cranky tone. "I heard you were sick."

Natsu glared in accusation. "Yeah, and it's probably your fault."

Gray froze as the scathing words pierced his chest. With a lump in his throat, he dropped his head. "Yeah, you're probably right," he admitted. "Which is why I'm here. It's my duty to take care of you."

"Duty?" Natsu questioned.

Gray nodded with solemn determination. "As a Dominant, it's my duty to take care of my Submissive."

Natsu stared at him for a long, tense moment before practically snarling, "Who the hell are you calling submissive?"

Those furious words took Gray by surprise. Then he realized Natsu probably did not know the proper terminology. "Well, that's what it's called. You're … you know…"

"No, I'm not. I'm not submissive to anyone, least of all you."

Gray looked shocked. "But … but that's how it works. You … we…"

"We're not that way at all, asshole."

Gray paused as he realized everything he had mentally conceived about their relationship was not at all what Natsu also thought. Gray assumed they were in normal dominant/submissive roles, yet he realized Natsu was not the sort who would want that. Tied up, maybe some pain, but…

Had he ever actually acted submissive?

"Shit," he whispered, running his hand through his hair as he realized his ideas had all been one-sided. "So, how do you want this relationship to work?"

Natsu pulled the blankets up to his chin. "I don't know. Is Happy here?"

"He left to the store."

Natsu looked a little relieved. He did not want to discuss these sorts of things with Happy around. "I need to be … tied up and … and forced," he said so quietly, Gray had to come closer just to hear him, "but I'm not submissive, all right? I don't want to be submissive, not to you."

Gray sat on the edge of the bed. "So … what? Just a masochist?"

Natsu sank even deeper into the blankets. Discussing this in the daylight was way too embarrassing. "Yeah, I guess that's what you'd call it."

"Okay. So … um … how do you want to … uh…"

"What's wrong?" Natsu asked, confused by the frustrated expressions on Gray's face.

"I'm trying to figure this out," Gray said a little snappishly.

"Does it need names? Do you have to title everything, label exactly what we have here? I don't want to be labeled, or feel like I have to fit into a category. I'm just gonna do whatever the hell I want, okay? And one thing I won't do is be a mewling, subservient slave to you. Like hell I'd do that!"

Gray tried to process this, rearranging his mental picture of their relationship. Natsu had a point. He had rushed forward and labeled Natsu: submissive masochist. It made things nice and neat, a textbook BDSM relationship, but in real life, things rarely worked that easily.

"So, you don't want me to order you around?"

Natsu snapped peevishly. "I'm not gonna listen to your orders. I mean, if you suggest we try something … I'm not that experienced, so if you have a suggestion, that's fine, but I won't obey everything you tell me to do."

"So, it's okay if I order you to do some stuff, right? If it'll help us with whatever we're doing that night?"

"Well, yeah, I guess," Natsu mumbled. "I wouldn't know how to do this kinky crap you're into." Natsu watched as Gray rubbed his chin with a furrowed brow. The Dragon Slayer chuckled and shook his head. "You're still trying to organize this into a nice, neat, perfect little category, Gray. We don't need to be categorized. Let's just be us. You don't have a role to fulfill. There is no dominant and submissive. I mean, I'm a masochist, and you're obviously a sadist, and that works for both of us, but … you know, I might want to hurt you, bite you, or scratch you. I won't limit myself to a role I have to play. I may want you to order me around, just for fun, but I won't always obey you. I'm not going to blindly follow you around like a puppy, obeying all your rules and orders. I don't want that. I want to just be us. Okay?" he pleaded, rubbing Gray's arm. "Let's just be lovers."

Gray looked down at those hot fingers and chuckled softly. "Lovers, huh?"

"Well, yeah. That's what we are, right? Let's just be us."

Gray did not mind the sound of that one bit. Just lovers. What a wonderful category to be in! "I'm still gonna take care of you."

Natsu sighed and leaned back on his pillow. "Fine, whatever. If you feel guilty for making me sick, then take responsibility."

"Guilty," Gray mused. That was what it boiled down to. He felt guilty for making Natsu sick. "I shouldn't have pushed you so hard last night."

Natsu glared, and then looked away. "Yeah, maybe you shouldn't have."

Gray turned to him in horror. "Wh-What?"

"I'm serious. That was probably too much. At least for the first time. I'm not saying I hated it, but…" Natsu's face contorted with embarrassment mixed with anguish. "Can we … slow it down a little? Ease me into these kinks of yours, Gray. I'm not used to this. Hell, two days ago I was a virgin."

Gray's eyes widened. "You really were a virgin?"

"Yeah. What'd you think?"

"Well, I thought you were at first, but then…" His voice faded away.

"Then, what?"

Gray thought about everything Natsu had told him about his past, all the horrible things he had considered might have occurred during that mysterious, torturous time that twisted the Dragon Slayer into someone who could not trust his own desires.

"Nothing, just … it's nothing…"

Natsu stared hard, trying to decipher him. "Graaaaay…"

"Nothing! I just wasn't sure. I mean … sheesh," he whispered, running his fingers through his hair.

"Gray, you're hiding something."

Suddenly, the ice wizard snapped, "No, you're the one hiding something." He caught himself too late and saw the wide eyes on Natsu's face. "Sorry. I'm not gonna make you tell me. I'm better than that."

Natsu rolled his eyes up to the ceiling. "Oh God, it's about that?"

"Well, yeah," he shouted. "Natsu, I … I…"

He growled and looked away. He wanted to say I love you but he was unsure if he could really say it. He was not even sure if that was the right emotion, and to say something like that, Gray wanted to be sure first.

"I'm worried about you, okay? I care for you, and I don't want to see you hurt. Yeah, I'm curious. It's affecting us. But … I won't force you to say anything. It was probably traumatic, right?"

Natsu gave a weak shrug. "Guess so."

"I can tell. So I won't force you to say anything. You can keep it a secret, but I'm still worried. I don't know when I might say something wrong, set you off, and … and I don't ever want to do that to you again. I want things to be good between us, I want us to have fun, and I'm seriously worried about you."

He saw the guilt in Natsu's face. It was obvious he did not want to talk about it, but by the tears gathering in Natsu's eyes, he realized that the Dragon Slayer felt deeply guilty for keeping it a secret.

"Hey, come here." He pulled Natsu into his arms, hugging him. "It's all right."

"You said it's affecting us."

"No, I … I mean … oh shit, I didn't mean it that way. I don't want to pressure you."

Natsu turned his face away as he scowled.

"Hey," Gray said lightly, tugging that stubborn chin. "Don't look away. Come on, give me a kiss. Just a kiss."

Natsu arched an eyebrow as he glanced over. "Just a kiss? You mean we can just kiss?"

"The hell are you talking about? Of course we can just kiss. Unless you don't want to," he said, feeling a little uncertain.

Natsu finally looked back over, and his face softened. His hand reached up, and he caressed Gray's worried face. "No, I want to," he whispered, and he leaned in slowly. "Just a kiss."

Gray felt those burning lips brush against his. Then Natsu's fingers threaded through his black hair, and he gripped a little tighter, pulling at the strands until Gray gasped softly. Natsu took that opportunity to slip his tongue past those cold lips and heat that mouth with his own scalding breath.

Gray moaned at the domineering kiss. This must be what Natsu meant. During sex itself, he needed to be tied up, but in moments of romance, Natsu tended to take the lead role. Gray realized, he did not really mind. He was bad at the whole concept of romancing someone. He was more used to picking up a person at a pub, buying them a few drinks, and getting what he needed out of them, maybe a week or two of treating the person to dinners and movies, but when it came to actual romance, he really was a novice.

So he let Natsu kiss him, hold him, and that heat utterly melted Gray's icy shell.

"Mmm, your lips are always so hot," he moaned.

Natsu leaned back a bit and smirked. "And your mouth is always refreshing, like mouthwash."

That made Gray laugh. He stroked Natsu's face, but it was hot, so much hotter than usual. Worried, he felt the Dragon Slayer's forehead.

"Sheesh, you're burning up. How do you feel?"

"Honestly?" Natsu flopped back down onto the bed. "I've got blood in my piss."

Gray flinched. "Oh God!" He didn't realize it was that bad already.

"Yeah, burns like crazy when I pee, and for it to burn me, you know it's gotta be bad." He twisted around as the aching sensation began to return. "I keep feeling like I need to pee, but then I don't have to. It's annoying."

"Rest for a few days," Gray ordered. "I'm seriously going to take care of you. I want to be there for you and … and…" Gray looked away with guilt. "I'm so sorry, Natsu. I didn't think it'd get that bad. I'm … really sorry." He firmed up a bit. "Next time we do this, I'll prepare in advance, make sure you're hydrated. And drink lots of water now," he insisted. "You need to flush this out of you before it hits your kidneys."

Natsu grumbled, "If I drink more, I pee more, and peeing burns."

"You need to drink," Gray insisted. Then he slumped down and ran his fingers through his hair in anguish. "I'm … sorry. I'm really sorry I made you sick."

"Hey," Natsu laughed, "a little bladder infection won't kill me."

"But you're in pain, and not a pain I want you to feel." Gray rubbed Natsu's arm and felt the fever under the skin. "Your body is burning up. I want to take care of you. Can I do that much?"

Natsu shrugged. "Yeah, if you wanna take care of me when I'm sick, that's fine." He blushed a bit, but then felt anger at how he was reacting. "Ya know, I'm starting to feel like some damn uke, and I really don't want that."

Gray chuckled. "But you are the uke."

Natsu glared at him. "No, I'm not."

"Yeah you are. You're the bottom."

"That doesn't mean anything. An uke is all doe-eyed and whimpering. Like hell I'd be that!"

"Okay," Gray said playfully. "Then what are you?"

"I told you, I'm not anything. No categories. No seme, no uke, no dominant and submissive … nothing. The only thing I do sorta fit is being a bit of a masochist, but I'm a sadist in my own way. I mean, I do like to bite you."

Gray had to laugh at that. "Yeah, and you bite pretty damn hard."

Natsu gazed at where he had bitten, and he caressed the purplish-red bruise. "You still have a mark on your neck."

"You have one too," Gray pointed out. "It's starting to fade, though. Before it fades completely, I want this infection to be healed up. I want to do more to you. I want to put a mark back on your neck."

Despite the fever, Natsu felt a chill shivering over his skin. "I like the idea of hiding it with my scarf. I also like some of the ideas we came up with last night." He unconsciously licked his lips as he thought about that.

"Oh, talking about that, I found my list, the whole list, not simply what I came up with from memory, and I have a few more questions."

Natsu rolled his eyes and collapsed back onto the pillows. "Oh God, the Checklist of Fucking?"

"Yeeeees," Gray teased. "First, something I forgot, but it occurred to me later: what do you think of roleplaying master and slave?"

Natsu stared hard at him, silent, his eyes narrow, and Gray got a chill from the fierceness in those squint eyes. It took half a minute before Natsu finally snarled, "What … the … hell?"

The flames that flickered on the Dragon Slayer's skin surprised Gray. "It's when you—"

"No!" Natsu shouted in outrage. "I won't be someone's slave. I … I won't…" His voice dropped to a whisper. "I won't do that."

"See, this is why we need a list. I need to know what I can and can't do. I realized when I said something about sex slave last night, it seemed like a bad idea to you, so that's why I'm asking."

Natsu shouted, "Do you mean you're psychoanalyzing me while we're having sex?"

"I need to know what makes you tick, what works and what doesn't. I need to remember this stuff so I don't mess up. I … I don't want to mess up with you, Natsu. I … I wanna…" He clenched his fists and turned away. "Goddammit."

"You wanna what?"

"I want this to work."

"Why?"

"What do you mean, why?" Gray shouted.

"Why?" Natsu demanded.

"Because!" He stared at that stubborn face. "I … care about you."

"Care about me?"

"Yeah!" Gray yelled in exasperation.

Natsu thought about that, and how he said it. "Do you love me?"

Now Gray looked hesitant. He pulled back a little as a shiver prickled over his skin.

"I wanna know," Natsu insisted. "I've said it already."

"Natsu, I told you." He turned his head aside and muttered, "It's … not easy for me to say things like that."

"See, now I need to psychoanalyze you."

"Why the hell do you need to do that?"

"Because I'm curious. You obviously have an issue with falling in love. I want to know why. Did something happen in your past, something you're not telling me, some secret?"

"Natsu…" Gray warned.

"I wanna know," the Dragon Slayer insisted stubbornly.

Gray stared into the corner of the room. "You wanna know, huh?"

"Yeah. I mean, that is to say, if you're okay telling me. If you're not, I totally understand, but—"

"Okay, fine!" Gray shouted. "It's not really a secret, I guess, and yeah, it's something from my past." He stood up and stomped over to the window, glaring out at the mocking sunshine. "Who was the first person you ever said I love you to?"

Natsu's brow creased. "Do you mean romantically or…?"

"Just saying the words. Saying I love you." He flinched to say it, even like this.

"I dunno. Probably my real parents. I don't really remember that far back."

"And they're gone, right? Who was the next person you told?"

"Igneel. I used to tell him I loved him all the time."

"And he left you too, right?"

"Hey!" Natsu shouted in anger.

"Anyone else? After Igneel, who was the next person you told?"

"I have no idea. Probably Happy. No, maybe Lisanna. Or possibly that old lady who found me when Igneel vanished."

Gray ground his teeth together. "Every person who I've ever said I love you to them … has either died or is no longer around. Every … fucking … one of them," he shouted. "So if I'm just a little hesitant about saying those words, I think I have a damn good reason."

"Whoa, wait," Natsu cried out. "All of your lovers died?"

"No! Because I don't say…" He cut the words off. "I don't say those words anymore. I said them every night to my parents. They died! I used to say it to my childhood friends. They all died! I said it to my second grade teacher who was my first crush. A week later, I saw her broken body during Deliora's attack." He broke into tears. "I said it to … to Ur. Now she's gone too." He snuffled up the tears and angrily wiped his eyes. "That was the last time I said it. That was the last time I ever told anyone I love you. Because…" He clenched his fists until his fingernails threatened to break skin. "I'm … scared. Okay? Every time I say it, every time I feel it, that person gets taken away. So I don't fall in love. I just … I can't."

"Sheesh, Gray. That happened years ago."

Gray gave a soft sigh. "So?"

"So!" Natsu cried out. Then he realized, he really had no right to criticize Gray about obsessing over an incident in the distant past. "Okay," he sighed in resignation. "I guess I can understand. You're just worried about me, right?"

"Yeah," Gray whispered, and he glanced back over to the bed. "I … I don't want to say it and lose you."

"That's superstitious."

"Fine. So it is. So I'm superstitious." He reined back his anger. "Look, I might say it someday, but … I'm scared at the moment. I really don't want to lose you, and I…" He let out a heavy sigh. "I care for you."

Natsu considered his words. "Is that your way of saying I love you without actually saying it?"

"Maybe."

"Okay. Just say it another way, if you're superstitious. Say I care for you. That's enough for me. I'll know what you mean."

Natsu reached a hand out with a beckoning smile. Gray sighed in happiness, walked back to the bed, took that hand, and kissed the knuckles. He felt blessed, but also scared. If he were to lose someone like Natsu…

No, Natsu was strong. He had trust that Natsu would fight this weird curse. Until the time when he felt brave enough to chance it, at least he could say:

"I care for you, Natsu."

The Dragon Slayer gave me a warm, happy smile. "I love you too."

The two stared into one another's eyes for a few sentimental seconds.

"We sound like idiots," Gray pointed out.

Natsu laughed happily. "So? Idiots in looooove," he crooned.

Gray rolled his eyes. "Shit…"

"Come on," he sang tauntingly. "Say I care for you."

"You make us sound like one of those stupid-couples." Gray's lips tweaked up. "You are cute, though."

Natsu glared hard. "Shut the hell up."

Gray flinched. "Oh God, I'm so sorry, I forgot you hate that. I'm sorry, I'm seriously sorry. I'll have to remember that. See! We're still figuring each other out."

"Yeah, I guess so." Natsu relaxed again. A stupid-couple figuring one another out! No categories, no roles, just foolish lovers. It was a nice category to be in.

"Well," Gray sighed, hefting up to his feet like some old man. "I'll make you some soup. I also bought some cranberry juice. That should help."

"Cranberry juice?"

"Yeah, it heals bladder infections."

"And you know this … how?"

Gray blushed crimson. "I might have had one or two."

"Because of your … thing? Your peeing fetish."

"Uh … y-yeah, because of that."

Natsu accused in anger, "Which means you knew this could happen to me."

Gray flinched. "It's a possibility. Usually it doesn't happen unless you've been holding it a lot, or you're dehydrated."

"Something you didn't know about me."

Gray realized he was right. He did not know if Natsu drank lots of water or not. He did not know if maybe he held his bladder frequently over the past few days. He had assumed too many things. "Okay, you're right. It was a danger I didn't fully take into account. I mean, anything kinky we do has the possibility of being dangerous. I could've tied you up and dislocated your shoulder. Anything with BDSM could be potentially harmful if done wrong. Do you still want to do it?"

"Yeah," Natsu mumbled. "I sorta like that stuff. Just be careful next time."

"Well, maybe next time you shouldn't hold it until you're in serious pain."

"Isn't that the point?" Natsu shouted. How dare this stripper accuse him.

"Perhaps … and it was really hot, watching you squirm."

Natsu paused, and then he glanced down to Gray's boxers. His jeans had vanished sometime since he entered the bedroom. "You're getting turned on just remembering it, aren't you?"

"Maybe," he mumbled, gazing over the bronze skin that was half hidden by bedsheets.

Natsu sighed and looked away. "Gray, I shouldn't—"

"No. You have a bladder infection. You shouldn't do anything sexual."

He turned away, but walking two steps told him that the stiffness in his boxers was worse than he thought. Now at a profile, Natsu could see the pole poking at the cotton fabric, and he licked his lips as he thought about what that thing could do to pleasure him.

"Do you want to do anything to ease it?"

"Like what? I don't want you to strain yourself."

"I thought it was really hot watching you jerk off."

Gray looked over to the bed. Damn him, but Natsu looked outright predatory with those narrow eyes gleaming at him like a wild beast. A surge hit Gray's cock, but he barely kept his hand away from touching it.

"We shouldn't," he whispered hoarsely. "Happy…"

"Oh right, Happy," Natsu recalled, frowning with disappointment. "Maybe later?"

"Another day," Gray said. "When you're feeling better."

"Yeah. Happy might come in, and you never know when Lucy or Erza might show up with chicken soup or some other thing they think will make me feel better. Yeah, probably a bad idea to do kinky stuff here, where people could see."

Oh God, it would be hot if Gray was in the middle of touching himself when they heard Lucy knocking at the door, or to see Gray scramble away at the sound of Erza's clomping armor boots. To push their limits, to do stuff where someone might find them…

Natsu laughed to himself. Crap, am I actually an exhibitionist?

Gray noticed the bulge growing under the blankets. "You're getting aroused by some perverted thoughts, aren't you? What are they?"

"Nothing," he snapped. Gray had said he did not want to do kinky stuff in public, and although Natsu's house was anything but public, it was also not as secure as Gray's apartment or a love hotel. Natsu had to deal with a roommate and friends who dropped by.

"Do you need me to take care of it?"

Natsu glanced over. "I … want to say yes, but I probably shouldn't." He softly chuckled that they were being such idiots, torturing one another with their fantasies. "Let's stop getting each other aroused."

"Hah! Yeah right." Gray stood there, staring at the door, not moving. Simply being in the same room as Natsu was enough to arouse him.

"So, what now?"

Blandly, Gray said, "I'm trying not to think about you so I'll shrink down."

"Ohhh?" Natsu teased. "Do you get aroused just thinking about me?"

"Hell yes, and you're not helping."

Natsu kept quiet, watching as Gray tried to regain his composure, but it did not seem to be working. "Gray, before two days ago, did you ever … I dunno … think of me in … in any sort of way?"

Gray sighed and looked away. "Is this one of those trick questions and you're gonna hate me if I say no?"

"Uh … no." He squirmed and rubbed his wrist where there was still a bruise from the handcuffs. After a long, awkward pause, he confessed, "I didn't think of you that way. Ever. I don't know if that's okay, or if that's really crummy of me. I mean, a few days ago, you were just the annoying stripping pervert, and now … lovers," he exclaimed. "I was wondering if that was weird." He paused as he thought over something. "Okay, maybe once or twice I had those dreams about you imprisoning me in ice, but they weren't serious. They were just … dreams."

"Yeah, same here."

Natsu jolted. "What? You dreamed about me?"

"Maybe," he whispered shyly.

"About doing what?"

"I dunno, nothing specific, just … dreams about you."

"So, did we have something before all of this?"

"Just our own fantasies."

"Okay." Natsu smiled, and then he laughed happily.

"You like that idea, don't you?"

"I'm glad this is more than a spur-of-the-moment thing, and maybe we're making a huge mistake. At least we felt something before, so … that's good. Well, I wasn't really in love with you. Just … fantasies."

"Same here."

"Okay," he said, slightly relieved. "We probably both just … fantasized about one another, not really in love, but … but now we are?" He ended it in a question. Gray sighed, and his brow tensed up. "Sorry. I know, you won't say it's love. So, we care for one another, right?"

"Yeah."

"Okay." Care for one another. It was Gray's way of saying it was love, without him committing to that taboo emotion that scared him. "Gray, did you want to tell other people? I mean, it'd be harder to hide everything, but I kinda feel bad for not saying anything to our friends, like this is shameful. I don't want to feel ashamed. I mean, I don't want people to know I'm … how I am," he said awkwardly. "I'm kinda ashamed of that issue, but I'm not ashamed that I'm with you. I don't want you to think I'm hiding it because I feel guilty for liking guys. I honestly don't feel that way. Hiding this from Happy all morning … it made me feel sorta bad."

Gray sighed in frustration that he was bringing this up again. "Natsu, I've said this before. It's up to you. I don't care either way. But you're right, if people knew … God, I mean … just look at your wrists."

"Huh?"

"Your wrists are all bruised up. Didn't you notice that?"

"Oh! Yeah, I noticed a little. I'm used to bruises."

"You were … thrashing around a lot last night," he whispered, remembering the sexy scene of Natsu writhing under him. This was really not helping his erection. "Those handcuffs were too hard. Next time we should use rope, or maybe the fuzzy cuffs."

Natsu laughed. "Fuzzy cuffs?"

"It's not funny. They're less likely to leave marks. I mean, right now, if people saw those bruises, they'd merely think you were in a fight and someone grabbed your wrists. If they know we're together, and they see bruising like that, the more perverted people in the guild will guess what we do."

"Perverted? You mean Erza, Cana, Mira, and Macao."

Gray laughed that he had named those people specifically. "Yeah, them."

"So, we should hide it?"

"I dunno. If you feel bad about keeping it secret, then let's not. We just have to be more cautious about leaving marks. I mean, look at my chest." He opened up his shirt and showed the pink scratch lines that still ached his skin. "Mira saw this and thought I had fought an animal. I've been struggling all day to keep my shirt on because of these scratches. If anyone sees it, and they know I'm dating you, they'll guess right away."

Natsu stared at those scratches. He had been so happy to leave the marks on Gray, but he had not thought about how marking Gray like that would be troublesome. Now he felt bad for doing it. A bruise here or there, they could pass off, but nail marks were not as easily explainable.

"Gray, do you not like doing this?"

"What?" he gasped. "Of course I do."

"Should I not scratch you?" Natsu asked meekly.

Gray looked down at the marks. "No … I liked it," he admitted hesitantly. "It's just that leaving marks can cause a bit of a problem. Still…" He gazed at Natsu, at the hickey, the wrist bruises, and the bits of skin that were still flawless, like a blank slate waiting to be decorated.

"What? You're looking at me funny."

Gray licked his lips. "I wanna mark up your body … bad."

Natsu's breath caught, and his heart began to race. "Gray," he whined. "Come on, don't get me turned on like this."

He snapped out of his salacious daze. "Sorry. I know, you're sick." He forced his eyes away. "I'll make you some juice. You should drink a lot, relax, take it easy. Don't think too hard on all this." Gray held Natsu's hand. "We'll figure this out as we go."

The Dragon Slayer squeezed those cold fingers tightly. Then Natsu raised Gray's hand up and kissed those pale knuckles. With his lips on Gray's hand, those narrow green eyes lifted, and the ice wizard gulped hard at the way those eyes gleamed at him.

Just then, a high voice called out. "Naaatsuuuuu."

Gray yanked his hand away. "Happy's home."

The Dragon Slayer blushed and pulled back. "Button your shirt up."

"Oh, right. And you might want … you know, scarf. Cover the…" He pointed to the purple mark on Natsu's neck.

"Oh, yeah." He pulled the white muffler around him, hiding the hickey.

Gray stepped closer to Natsu's bed. "Yeah, make sure it's up, and … here—" He tugged the scarf to hide the mark, but his hand lingered on Natsu's skin. Those long, cold fingers made Natsu shiver. "You're … burning up."

"Gray," Natsu huffed. "Don't … don't touch my neck like that. It's making me…" He awkwardly pointed to the arousal poking at the blankets.

"Oh! Sorry. I just … I wanna…" Gray wistfully gazed over that rock hard body.

"I know. Me too."

Right at the moment, the bedroom door opened, and Gray leaped away from the bed.

"Hey, Happy," he called out overly loud.

"Hello, Gray. How's Natsu?"

"Still sick. I'm gonna … you know … make juice. Um, can I borrow your bathroom first?"

Natsu arched an eyebrow. He had a feeling Gray wanted to do more than pee in the bathroom. Make juice

God, he wanted to watch! He wanted to sit there, watch Gray touch himself, hear his seductive groaning, see his fingers stroke the length of his shaft, and have Gray come all over his face. He wanted to taste it, smell it, eat it up—

"It's down the hall," said Happy.

Natsu began to sit up. "I'll show you where—" He stopped in pain and grabbed his back. "Shit, ow!"

Gray rushed over to him. "Natsu!"

"I'm fine, just my back hurts."

Gray put his hand right over the kidneys. "Around here?"

"Yeah."

"Dammit. The infection must have hit your kidneys. Natsu, you're gonna need to see a doctor."

"I'm fine. I'll drink juice and—"

"You need medicine. I'll pay, if that's the problem."

Natsu had to admit, that really was the issue. He had not gone on a mission for a while, and his money was running low.

"We should go right away. Happy, you might have to carry him."

"Sure, but don't you need to use the bathroom first?"

"I … uh … don't really have to go anymore," he said awkwardly. Seeing Natsu in pain had killed his arousal instantly.


 

Once Natsu was dressed, Happy had to carry him and flew beside Gray as they walked to Porlyusica's house. They knocked on her door, and the ancient pink-haired doctor answered with a glare in her wrinkled red eyes.

"You two smell awful. What do you want?"

Gray stepped forward. "Natsu has a kidney infection. He's being stubborn about seeing a doctor, but he agreed to see you."

Natsu grumbled, "I know she won't charge an arm and a leg just for some medicine, and I trust her more than some lousy city doctor."

"Fine," Porlyusica snapped. "Bring him in. You stay out. You reek," she sneered to Gray.

"I showered this morning."

"You still stink like someone pissed on you."

Gray's face went pale, and Natsu's eyes widened as his cheeks flushed. Silently, Gray backed off, and Happy flew Natsu inside the old woman's home. He was dropped to the bed, and then Happy hurried out before the ancient healer had a chance to insult his smell too.

"Kidney infection, huh?" Porlyusica asked gruffly as she went to a sink to wash her hands.

"It hurts to pee, there's blood in my piss, and now my lower back hurts."

"Sounds like a urinary tract infection, all right. Any clue how you got it?"

Natsu shrank down and looked away. "Maybe from holding it too long."

"That can do it. For the next week, when you get even the faintest feeling like you need to pee, get to a bathroom. Don't hold it for more than five minutes. Don't eat anything sugary. Drink a lot of water. Cranberry juice too."

"Gray also mentioned about cranberries."

"I'm gonna give you a shot."

Natsu drew back at that threat.

"It'll clear up the initial problems and should ease the pain. Then there's some medicine you have to drink three times a day. I'll need a few minutes to let it brew." She tossed a bunch of herbs into a pot and set it over her fireplace. "I'll examine you while that boils. Shirt off."

Natsu tugged off his shirt. He looked down and saw the bruises on his wrists. She would definitely notice those. He wished he had worn his wristband.

Porlyusica checked his eyes, ears, nose, and throat, making him say "ah." This was all routine. Then she felt his back, and Natsu flinched when her cold hands reached the kidneys.

"What are these bruises on your neck and shoulder?"

"Uh … n-nothing. Maybe a fight."

"Fine. I'll check your temp and pulse." She rammed a thermometer into his mouth, then took his wrist. "My, my. You have some nasty bruises here too."

With the thermometer in his mouth, Natsu muttered, "Ish nothing. Jesh a fight."

"Just a fight, huh?" She sniffed him, then she leaned back and glared at him with hard eyes. "A consensual fight, or not?"

Natsu's eyes went huge.

"You reek of sex, you have bruises all over you, and you're sick. Were you assaulted?"

"No!" Natsu shouted so loudly, the thermometer spit out of his mouth. Porlyusica caught it with ease.

Gray burst through the door. "Are you okay, Natsu?" he asked in worry.

"Get out, you stinking human," Porlyusica roared, chasing him back outside with her broom and slamming the door on him. Then she looked down to the thermometer in her hand. "That's a bad fever. I'll give you something to take it down." She walked over to her cabinets. "That guy is rather protective over you."

"Gray?" Natsu looked toward the door. "Y-Yeah, I guess so."

She glanced back at him warily. "Is he a good partner?"

"What?" Natsu cried out, and his voice cracked.

"If he's abusive—"

"He's not!" Natsu shrank down. "That is … Gray and I … It's not like he does anything I don't want." He shrank down even lower. "It's just … how I am. I don't want anyone to know."

"A doctor never divulges information about her patients," Porlyusica told him. "Drink this." She gave him a cup, and Natsu gulped down something vile. "It's not like I care, anyway. However, by law and by the ethics followed by all healers, if I think a patient is being abused, I have to report it."

"It's not like that," Natsu whispered, handing the empty cup back to her. "Not in that way."

She raised an eyebrow, but she said nothing more. "Drop your pants. I need to give you a shot."

Natsu shifted around, undid his belt, and grimaced as he lowered his pants. Porlyusica had a needle with medicine inside. She rubbed a spot on the side of his butt cheek with alcohol, but as she looked at Natsu's bare buttocks, she saw even more bruises striping the skin, made by what she could tell must have been a belt.

"Have him go easier on you."

"I already told him that," Natsu mumbled. Then he felt the stab of the needle and cried out.

"Oh yeah, it might burn."

"Holy shit!" Natsu screamed. "What the hell is that?"

"Medication to take away the infection." She pulled the needle out and put a bandage over the shot. "You might not want to sit on that side for an hour." She walked over to the bubbling cauldron now steaming with a pungent fetor of the herbs she had added. "The next time you have an infection like this, come see me as soon as you have symptoms. Don't let it get this bad."

"I was fine last night."

"Then you might be sensitive to kidney infections. You probably shouldn't do that sort of thing anymore."

"But…" Natsu hugged his arms and looked away. "What if I wanna?"

She gazed back at him and that bashful posture. "Then plan for it a day beforehand, drink a lot of water with frequent urination the day before, and when it's time for that, don't hold it to the point of pain. After you're done with your play, continue drinking a lot of water and pee as soon as you get the urge. Cranberry juice will help keep the kidneys clean too. However, if this happens again, then even if you like it, it might be something you simply can't do."

Natsu had a stubborn pout. Although he had warned Gray not to do so much so quickly with him, when someone told him he couldn't do something, he instantly set in his mind that he was going to anyway.

Porlyusica carefully poured the cauldron's brew into a massive flask. "Half a cup of this three times a day for a week, or until it runs out, even if you feel better. That way the infection doesn't return." She shouted to the door. "You can come in."

Happy was the first to fly in, followed by Gray, who held back a little.

"Take this dragon boy home and let him rest. You, naked one, you'll carry this medicine for him."

Happy hefted Natsu up and began to fly him out while Gray came forward to retrieve the flask. Before handing it over, Porlyusica stared hard at him.

"Make sure you take care of him," she scolded quietly. "That's the Dominant's job."

Gray jolted, stunned by her words. "What did that flame-brain tell you?" he asked angrily.

"Nothing much. I guessed most of it based on his bruises and your reactions around him. Not that I'm into that sort of stuff, but Fairy Tail wizards do tend to lean toward the … rougher side of lovemaking. I've seen some bad injuries from rough play like that in my years. Letting him get sick like this is bad BDSM. If you're trying to hide it, you need to make sure he doesn't end up like this. A Dominant's prime duty is to take care of the mental and physical well-being of his partner."

Gray glanced out the door where Happy was waiting a little down the road. "I'm not a Dominant, not with Natsu," he whispered. "That idiot could never be fully submissive to anyone." He said it gruffly, but he felt a little proud about his wild Dragon Slayer. "But you're right, the responsibility really does lie on me, if only because I'm the one who hurt him."

"You're still young. You'll make mistakes. Don't beat yourself up because you beat him too hard or pushed his limits."

"Yeah," Gray muttered. "This is the first relationship where I can truly go to any extreme lengths. I'm not really sure what I'm doing sometimes, but I can't let him know that."

"That's the sort of mentality a Dominant has, thinking they must always be in control."

"Because normally, that's how I am," he admitted. "It's different with him, though. I think he's pushing my limits, to be honest."

"Then learn together, but be more careful. If you're unsure about your own limits, you really need to be cautious about his."

"I will," Gray promised. "Don't tell anyone. He wants to keep it a secret for now."

"So long as you take care of him. If he gets sick again, bring him to me directly."

"I will. Here's money for the medicine." He dropped a pouch of Jewels on her desk. "Thanks again … for everything."

"I still serve Fairy Tail," she said solemnly. "Now get out of my house before you make the whole place smell like piss."

"Seriously, lady, I've taken two showers since we did that."

"You still smell. Get out!" She raised her broom, and Gray fled before she could strike.


 

Three days later, Natsu was better and back at the guild, although he felt too weak to do a mission. He laughed as he complimented Mira's fire chicken that he had missed so much, and he half-listened to Lucy as she went on and on—and on and on and on, he thought—about a new chapter of her story. It was nice to be back among all of his friends.

Then he heard Gray's taunting voice. "Well, look who decided to get out of bed. I hope you slept well, Sleeping Beauty."

Natsu snapped back at him, "You're the one who needs beauty sleep, you droopy-eyed Snow White."

"If I'm Snow White, you must be the Pink Carnation, so delicate and hating to travel."

They bickered, until someone swung a punch, a chair was thrown, and the whole guild broke into a brawl. It was sheer chaos as everyone joined in. Even Lucy laughed and called out Loke to see if he wanted to throw a few punches for old time's sake.

Natsu ripped off Gray's underwear and held them above his head as he leaped atop a table. "Haha! Got them. Hey, maybe I should toss this to Juvia."

"YES!" the rain woman shouted, eagerly stretching her hands out to catch them.

"Bastard," bellowed Gray. "Hand that back."

Just before Natsu could toss the boxers, Elfman was tossed into him, and Natsu crashed into Gray, who had just leaped to join him on the table. All three were propelled to the other side of the guild and slammed into the wall. Gray's back hit the wood. Right against him was Natsu, smashed between Elfman and Gray, their faces mere centimeters apart.

They stared at one another for a quiet moment, blocked from sight by the Take-Over wizard's massive body. Natsu felt Gray's nude body, and he gazed at the bare chest. He realized the scratch marks were gone, as was the hickey. He wanted to mark Gray again, and to be marked, to show ownership of each other with scratches, bruises, and the roughness of their love.

Gray's eyes went hazy as he felt the hard, hot body smashed against him. He reached forward and let his fingers glide up Natsu's biceps, feeling those powerful muscles. Natsu gulped at the cold touch. A sly smile rose into Gray's face. God, he wanted to see Natsu tied up, squirming under him, totally at his mercy, whimpering from the sweet pain he could dole out.

Elfman moved, pushing himself off of them. "Are you two okay?"

Gray's hand let go quickly. He continued to stare into Natsu's face. He flicked his eyes silently to the uproarious crowd, asking without words, Do you want to tell them? Natsu's mouth opened, yet he looked down sadly and shook his head. He did want to tell. He hated the idea of keeping secrets from his friends, especially about a relationship, but if others knew, it would make this sort of relationship more challenging.

"I'm fine," Gray said to Elfman, but then his eyes returned to Natsu, letting him know that statement applied to him as well. If Natsu wanted to keep it a secret, he was fine with that. Elfman moved away to rejoin the brawl, leaving Gray and Natsu against the wall. "So, how about you, fire-breath? Are you up to more?"

"Do you mean grappling with you?" Natsu smirked and leaned into his face. "It's not even hard yet."

"I'll vigorously beat you until you're too sore to walk."

"I can take any rough pounding you give me, popsicle-pants."

Gray was nearly panting with suppressed lust. "Your place or mine?" he breathed.

"Yours would be best."

"Let's get out of here," Gray whispered.

Natsu handed the underwear back. "I hope you're prepared."

"I'm always ready for a rough brawl with you."

As the riot inside the guild hall reached an apex, Gray dodged fighters to retrieve his scattered clothes, tugging them on as he made his way to the door. He saw Natsu already waiting outside. The Dragon Slayer beckoned with a come-hither finger, and Gray eagerly chased after him.

Chapter Text

They raced to Gray's house and slammed the door shut behind them. Natsu grabbed the lapels of Gray's coat, rammed him up against the door, and rolled his hips hard against the ice wizard. Gray moaned at the massive, heated hardness in Natsu's loose pants frotting up against him. It had only been a few days, but already he had missed this.

"You sure are eager," Gray said between fierce kisses.

"Mmm … Gray," Natsu moaned through his busy, burning lips. "I missed you." Then he tore open Gray's shirt, ripping apart buttons, and suddenly scratched hard right down his pale chest.

"Arrrgh," Gray cried out, arching back against the door at the pain of the clawing nails.

Natsu gazed as red marks swelled into welts, and he chuckled haughtily.

"Idiot," snapped Gray. "Why'd you scratch me like that?"

Natsu smiled arrogantly. "Because I wanted to. I like seeing my scratch marks on you."

"I can't take my shirt off when I'm like this."

Natsu leaned right up into Gray's face and rubbed right over the smarting scratches. "I know, and that's going to annoy you, at least for a day or two. It'll make you keep thinking about me. Come on, you big baby, I didn't even break skin. This will heal up real quick."

Still, Gray glared at him. Fighting his stripping habit for two whole days would be incredibly challenging. "Bastard," he grumbled.

Natsu pulled off his shirt, loosened his white scarf, and tugged it aside, exposing the side of his neck. "Do you want to mark me too?"

Gray stared at that flawless chest and pale neck, where only the ragged scar marked him. "Can I?"

Natsu nodded slowly. "I want you to. I wanna know you want to be mine, and to have me as yours. To mark me as your mate. If you wanna."

Gray caressed those burning, flushed cheeks. "Of course I want that." Slowly, he unwrapped the scarf and set it aside. "Can I bite you? I know you like it at the end, but—"

"Yes!" Natsu gasped loudly. He shuddered out a ragged breath to calm himself. "Yeah," he whispered. "I want that."

"Okay." Gray traced down the frantic artery throbbing with Natsu's racing heart. Then his finger stopped on a spot. "Right here. Is that okay?"

Natsu felt the press of that icy finger sizzling against his skin. The anticipation of being marked right at that spot made his neck clench up. "Yeah," he choked out. "The scarf should be able to hide it."

Gray pulled Natsu in closer, softly kissing the intended area in preparation. "You like the idea of hiding it with your scarf. Do you like when I leave marks on you that you have to hide? Does it make you feel kinky, being in public with a hickey barely hidden away, where people might see it? Hah! And you call me an exhibitionist."

"Shut up," Natsu snapped, breathless as Gray kissed and licked along the jagged neck scar. "Is … is it bad of me? I know you don't like things like that…"

"Natsu, it's fine. It's just a hickey. I might not like openly doing kinky stuff, but I know the thrill of pushing my limits in public. If you like this, if hiding my mark thrills you, then it's something you can do. If you're careful, no one will find out. If they do … I'd love to see you squirm your way out of explaining to Erza how you got a hickey on your neck."

Natsu looked aside and blushed. "It's just … it makes my heart race, and I like that feeling." He looked down bashfully. "Is that so bad?"

"No. It's sexy. So sexy … I'm gonna make your heart really race."

Gray attacked his throat, biting on the edge of the skin until Natsu shouted. Then he sucked hard on the wound. Natsu stiffened, and as Gray held him tightly, he shuddered under that attacking mouth.

Being marked! Being claimed!

Natsu gasped as Gray's mouth moved a little over, finding a new spot of skin, and kept sucking, viciously hard now, as if ready to suck the blood right through his pores. When at last his mouth released, the hickeys left behind were huge and already dark purple. Gray admired the marks with smugness.

"Oh, you better hide that with your scarf. No way you can play that off as mere bruises." Natsu was not moving, dazed and dizzy with the rush of hormones. "Are you okay?"

"Yes. God, that was … a lot. Did you break skin?"

"No, but that's a hell of a bruise. It'll be there for a week at least."

Natsu's lips curled in snarling delight. "Good."

"Are you really okay for this?"

"I need it." Natsu dived in and sucked down Gray's jawline and along the jugular vein.

"H-Hey, no hickeys on me. I can't hide them like you."

"Shut up," he snarled. "Do you have any clue how damn horny I've been?"

"So what would you like to do?" Gray offered.

Natsu stopped attacking Gray's neck and looked up at him in confusion. "Do?"

"Make-up sex. Or perhaps I should say it's Sorry-I-Made-You-Sick sex. You tell me what you want, order me to do anything, and I'll obey. This is your time, Natsu. This is my gift to you."

Those squinty eyes widened. "Anything?"

"Absolutely anything." Gray caressed the Dragon Slayer's cheek with the back of his knuckles.

Natsu lowered his head as he thought about the many fantasies he had in the past. They were always nothing more than dreams, imaginary situations, yet now, here with Gray, those seemingly bizarre fantasies could come true. "Well, there is something, but I'm not sure if you have the stuff for it."

"I can buy it. Anything you want to do, anything at all, doesn't matter how crazy or expensive." He rubbed up Natsu's hot arm. "Anything you want, I'll do it."

Natsu bit his lip and looked away. "C-Could you … maybe … um, tie me up with rope, and then … then … drip hot wax on me?" He looked over worriedly. "I know that may be weird, but … heat on my skin … I really like it. Playing with fire, and the heat, the burning wax … I used to do it to myself, but it's not the same."

Rope bondage! Dripping wax onto a lover! Gray had to calm his breathing and gulp hard before he could speak. "If that's what you want…"

He nodded eagerly.

Gray needed to stay composed. If he looked as aroused as he felt, this would all go totally wrong. Keeping his voice neutral, he ordered, "We can't use the bed. Wax won't get out of fabric easily, and I'd rather not ruin my sheets. Get an old towel from the hamper. Lay it on the ground in the kitchen. Then get undressed and lie down on the towel. I have rope, but I need to buy a candle from the store, won't take more than five minutes. Wait for me."

Natsu nodded. "Got it," he said, and he eagerly rushed off.

Gray had to get another shirt before he hurried out the door and practically ran to the nearest store. He thought any store would sell candles, but this one had nothing. Sexually frustrated, he hurried on to the next store, but still, no candles. With a curse, he ran to a store further down, but one he knew sold household goods. They had to have candles.

They did. Many types. Gray would have just grabbed the first one he saw, but he realized that he should pick a special one for Natsu. It needed to burn right, to have good wax, something that would not stain his floor too much if the drips missed the towel. The dyes in some of these candles might even be unhealthy. Natsu also mentioned early on that he hated strong fragrances. The candle should be odorless.

"Can I help you?" asked a weaselly looking clerk.

Gray knew he could not bluntly ask what candle was best to use on a lover. He needed to phrase his questions just right. "What wax is the coolest? You know, like if you don't want a little kid to get burned around them."

"Ah, one of these paraffin or soy wax candles would be best for that." He took Gray over to a display. Poor Gray had no clue candles were made of different ingredients. Wax was wax … right? Apparently not. "These are … well, I'm ashamed to admit it," the clerk chuckled with a blush, "but they're for … um … what's called wax play."

Gray's eyes widened.

"Oh, don't worry, we don't sell those sorts of items here, but although they were manufactured with that in mind, the fact is that their melting point is very low, so when they drip, they are not that hot. If you're using candles around children, you might want to use soy wax. It cleans out of fabric and hair with just a little hot, soapy water. Stay away from beeswax candles. The wax can get quite hot."

"And, if I want a candle that burns … hotter?" Gray asked quietly.

The oily clerk's beady eyes lit up. "Ah, well, in that case, come over here." He put his hand on Gray's shoulder and guided him to another part of the candle aisle. "Pure beeswax, no additives, set to burn hot but melt pure. If this ever-so-happens to drip on a person's skin … well, the pain is quite intense," he chuckled lewdly. "The problem with beeswax is that the melting point is so high, they're normally dripless, and therefore the molten wax falls slowly. Are you looking for more drips, or more heat?"

"Uh … a mix?" Gray said with a shrug, unsure what was better, and mortified that he was in public talking about this. The store was empty, but anyone could walk in. This was inching toward his aversion to being publicly known as a kink freak.

"Then my recommendation is for a paraffin pillar candle, which will build up a waxy center that can be poured out quicker, but a beeswax taper, which you can tip at a downward angle for more drips, and they'll be quite hot. Start high to let the wax cool as it falls, and then lower the candle slowly to your submis- … ah, I mean, to whatever it might be that you're dripping this onto. To avoid the wax soaking into anything, over here we have a drop cloth. Just lay that down where the wax will be … or where someone else may be lying down." He gave Gray a delving look. "Sounds about right for your needs, Mister Customer?"

Gray gulped. He was used to the sex shop and the friendly clerks there who helped him with purchasing kinky items, but this was just a normal store. Plus this clerk was creeping him out.

"I'll take them," he said sternly.

Gray grabbed a thin taper beeswax candle, a wide pillar paraffin candle, and he snagged the drop cloth as well. He paid for them and ran out of the store.

"I hope you come back to my store soon, Mister Customer," the clerk said slyly. "There's lots I could … ah … teach you."

"Creep," Gray muttered between clenched teeth.

When he was almost home, he realized he had no matches or lighters since giving up smoking. "Duh, I have a flame-brain." He hoped that was all he needed. He desperately wanted to get home before his boner popped up again.

When he entered, the sight before him nearly undid him. Natsu had laid a ratty towel on the kitchen floor, and he was lying atop of it … completely naked.

"I've been waiting a long time, Gray." Although his pout looked cute, that voice was sinful.

"Dear God," Gray whispered. Give me strength not to fuck him before I finish playing with him. "I got … stuff." His mind was faltering quickly. "The … person … clerk guy … he said I should use this drop cloth." Gray licked his lips as it felt like he was salivating.

"Oh, good. I can bunch the towel up for a pillow. This ground is cold and hard."

As Natsu stood, Gray watched how those muscles rippled. Cold … hard … yeah, that described something other than the floor right now.

"I'll help you spread it out."

God, he wanted to spread Natsu out, tie him down, and have his way with him.

Gray shook his head, trying to regain control. "Uh … y-yeah. Light this pillar candle first. We should let it have some time to melt."

Gray set the candles on the kitchen table. Natsu lit his finger on fire and pointed at the pillar's wick until it popped, sizzled, and caught alight. To Natsu's sensitive nose, the smell of wax began to overwhelm the snowy forest aroma of Gray's home. Still, he was thankful that the candle did not have some weird smell.

Gray hurriedly spread the drop cloth, with the towel rolled up as a pillow under it. Natsu lay back down, lying on his stomach. Gray raced around to get other stuff, like the rope, a candlestick holder for the taper candle, and a pitcher of water in case anything caught on fire. Natsu might be able to eat the flames, but he still felt safer with some water nearby, especially since both of them might end up too overwhelmed to extinguish a fire with magic. Caution was always of utmost importance.

The pillar candle had not burned much, so Gray lit the taper in the flame. Since he was holding it angled, it instantly dripped down the thin stick, and a drop hit Gray's skin. He gasped and used his other hand to quickly ice the burn.

"This one is supposedly the hottest candle. I wonder if it's too much."

"It'll be fine. My body handles heat well, remember?"

"Right. Are you ready for this?" he asked, bringing the candle over carefully.

Natsu looked back and gazed at the flame dancing on the tip of the wick. "Y-Yeah."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah, I want it."

Gray stood over Natsu and held the taper high above.

"Isn't that kind of high up?"

"It'll cool as it drips. Just to start." The oily clerk was smart to give that advice, although it made Gray wonder what the creep did with the overstock merchandise.

Gray held the candle over Natsu's back and tilted it until the melted wax began to drip. It slid down the stick, but finally Gray turn it enough so the wax dripped. The clear droplet fell through the air and splashed onto Natsu's skin.

The Dragon Slayer cried out at the first drops. "Ahh! What the hell sort of candle did you get? That's way hotter than the ones I've used before."

"Hurts?"

"No, feels really damn good."

More dripped, and with each droplet of wax, Natsu tensed up and moaned in pain. It burned more and more. Seeing the erotic artwork of waxy drops on Natsu's body aroused Gray with each colorless drip. Natsu was used to flames, but hot liquid was slightly different. He could not absorb the flames, since there were none. His skin was more tolerant than normal people, but still the shock of the melted wax made him cry out.

"God, Natsu," Gray moaned. He yanked his pants off without disturbing the candle as the growing bulge became too restrictive. "Are you all right?"

"Yes. You can bring the candle a little closer. It might make it hotter."

Gray smirked down at his prostrated boyfriend. "Do you want it hotter?"

"God, yes!"

Gray knelt, bringing the candle closer with each drop, until finally Natsu's moans became shouts.

"Is that good?"

"Hell yeah," he yelled frantically.

Slowly, the shouts of pain softened to hums of intense pleasure as wax built up upon more wax, and instead of burning, it felt like merely tingles of heat. Gray set the taper in a candlestick and picked up the huge pillar candle.

"Do you want to try this candle now? It's supposedly cooler, but there's quite a bit of wax built up inside."

Natsu breathed hard and nodded vigorously. "Yeah."

"I'm gonna start high again. I'm not sure how hot this will be. It's been pooling in here for a while, probably pretty hot."

"Good," Natsu groaned lustfully.

Gray chuckled at the low growl in his voice. "You're quite eager."

Natsu let out a soft moan. "I like the heat. I want more."

Gray licked his lips. God, he wanted to give Natsu so much more. But not yet. "All right. Here we go."

He tipped the pillar slowly, watching the clear paraffin wax inside draw closer to the edge, until a small stream dribbled. Instead of dripping straight down, it slid along the pillar, and the first few drops hardened before they had a chance to fall, but as Gray kept tilting, a molten trickle splashed down onto Natsu's back. The Dragon Slayer arched and screamed in pain.

"More," he snarled.

Gray was enthralled by the fearless body under him. Natsu's muscles tensed with hunger and need, rippling as Natsu tried to move into and away from the heat. Gray's own muscles shivered in sympathy for the burning pain that Natsu must be relishing. In the flickering candlelight, Natsu's body gleamed with each drop of sweat, teasing and enticing Gray.

"Are you okay?"

"God, yes! More!"

Gray realized that from this height, the wax was splashing too much. Drops flew past the drop cloth and hit his kitchen floor. When one drop splashed onto Gray's bare leg, he jolted back. That had been only one small drop, and of a lower temperature candle, but it was still like a branding iron to the ice wizard. He was shocked Natsu could handle a whole stream of the molten wax.

"Hey," Natsu muttered down into the towel pillow. "It's building up. Can't feel it as well."

Gray realized there was quite a design on Natsu's back, nothing artistic, he had only been pouring and dripping wherever he felt like, but now the wax had turned clumpy, especially where the spine's dip made the wax pool.

"Remove the wax," Natsu ordered.

"I'll have to rip it off."

"Good."

More pain. Gray used his ice magic to freeze the wax into hardness. Then he pulled and scraped it off Natsu's skin. He put the hardened globs to the side. Underneath, the skin was bright and warm from the burn.

"God, you're all pink underneath."

Gray touched the heated skin to make sure there were no blisters. A normal person would probably have some burns, if not blistering, but Natsu was different. He could take this, plus more. He was used to open flames, after all. Natsu suddenly flinched at Gray's touch.

"Is it sensitive?" asked Gray.

"Eh. Your fingers are cold."

Gray cooled off the burn. If the skin cooled down, Natsu would regain an even stronger sensitivity to the heat. Then quietly, he whispered, "You're gorgeous like this."

Natsu had good hearing, but he thought for sure he heard wrong. He turned his head and looked behind him to Gray. "What? Gorgeous?" he scoffed.

"Well, I'm not going to call you cute. You hate that. Seeing you like this, seeing your skin marked all pink … it's sexy." Gray leaned over Natsu's body and pressed his bare chest against the heated back. He licked the sweat on Natsu's neck, then dragged his tongue over to the Dragon Slayer's ear and hissed. "Down right erotic!"

Natsu shuddered as he heard those hungering words and felt the hardness in Gray's boxers thrust up against him slightly, teasing him. Then he felt Gray's teeth nip his ear. The bite made him groan and shudder.

"Do you want me to bite you?" Gray asked quietly, breathing cold air into his ear. "Or more wax?"

"Um … both?"

Gray laughed at his adorable selfishness.

"I guess … bring the candle closer. Make it as hot as it can be. Really burn me."

Gray pulled back from his sensual masochist and let his eyes rove over that body waiting so eagerly for pain. "Fine. A little more."

By now, the pillar candle had refilled some of the wax pooled in the center, although Gray saw there was not much. Still, he brought the candle directly over Natsu's skin. It was so close, the Dragon Slayer could feel the heat of the flame. Tilting slowly, Gray let the wax pour out onto the sensitive, and now slightly cooled, skin. Natsu cried out and arched; then he growled erotically. This time, Gray drew a line right up the spine, followed by lines of wax tracing the shoulder blades. Below, Natsu moaned, hummed, grunted, and sometimes when a drop hit skin that was already super sensitive, he let out a sharp cry followed by a hiss as pain sizzled into pleasure.

"So sexy," Gray snarled. "That's the last of the pillar wax, though. Let's go back to the taper while we wait for it. Maybe … down lower?"

Gray put the pillar candle aside to burn and build up wax again. He carefully lifted the taper candle, now with globs of dripped beeswax ribbing the sides. Walking between Natsu's legs, he broke off one of the thicker dribbles along the side, held the wax piece over the flame, and let the wax drip onto Natsu's upper thighs, where no wax had yet touched. That area was far more sensitive than the back, and Natsu cringed away from the droplets of molten heat.

Gray grinned sadistically and let out a low chuckle. "I like seeing you squirm every time it touches your skin. How close can I get, I wonder."

"Do it," Natsu whispered hoarsely. "Bring it closer. As hot as it can be."

Gray tossed aside the rest of the broken-off drip. He knelt again, tilting the candle, letting the drips of white wax pock Natsu's legs, from knees up to the thighs, with the flame dancing just an inch above. Every drip made Natsu flinch, and the rippling of his muscles enthralled Gray.

"Wow, the flame is almost touching your skin."

Natsu whimpered and clawed at the drop cloth. Gray licked his lips when he heard the rattling breaths shaking out of the Dragon's Slayer's lung.

"You're so sexy like this," Gray moaned through clenched teeth, trying hard to keep in control of himself. "God, I want you so bad." It came out half growl, half whimper as the desire for Natsu built up more and more.

With each drop, Natsu moaned or hummed from the pain and pleasure of heat. "Touch me," he begged breathlessly.

Gray stared at him, how Natsu had raised his hips a little to give access to the cock hardening under him. Then coldly yet teasingly, Gray answered, "No."

Natsu gasped at the denial and swung his head around to look at Gray. "Hey, I thought you said I get to order you around today."

"You get to pick what we do. I'm still the one who gets to decide when you come. Now, flip around onto your back. I wanna see your erection."

Natsu slowly moved, but as he began to flip around, all those lines and dots of wax made his skin feel hard, like a hundred small scabs covering fresh wounds.

"It's pulling at my skin," he complained.

"I know," Gray said deviously. "I want it to. It'll hurt more this way. You'll remember what I just did to your back as I do it again to your front. I wonder which side is more sensitive."

Natsu grumbled, but he kept moving around until he was lying on his back, cringing as the freezing floor radiated through the drop cloth and felt like razor blades of ice to his burned back. The cooled and hardened wax tugged at his skin. It was especially painful on his legs, where small hairs had caught up in the wax and were being pulled out by the root.

"Perfect. You're already so hard. I'm gonna tie you up now," Gray announced.

The annoyance of the wax fled his mind as Natsu watched eagerly. Gray blew out the taper so it would not be wasted, but he let the pillar candle burn to replenish the molten pool of wax. He then set both candles aside.

"Um, where did I put the rope?"

"On the coffee table," Natsu said quickly. "Hurry, Gray."

Gray laughed as he rose to his feet. "I like when you're so eager for me."

"Shut up," snapped Natsu. He wanted less talking and more restraining.

Gray walked over to where he had left the few lines of rope. He had treated this rope while Natsu was sick, hoping to use it on him one day. All the frayed parts were removed, leaving the rope smooth. It would not tear up Natsu's skin if he pulled too hard. It would only leave marks, maybe bruises if Natsu really struggled.

And damn he wanted to watch him struggle!

When he walked back over to the wax-messed drop cloth, he saw Natsu staring intensely, and then Gray noticed the increased size of his erection, twitching with eagerness as it stood at attention.

"You're so aroused just thinking about this," Gray purred.

"Because I need it," Natsu moaned. "I'm getting too aroused. I need to be tied up. Quickly."

"Before I do this, you need to promise not to use any magic. Especially not your magic. You see, the rope can burn, so you can't use any fire."

"Oh. Right," Natsu realized.

"Do you really want this?"

"Yes. While I was sick, I kept having a dream. You'd tie me up, string me out. I … I came in my sleep dreaming about that," he confessed with embarrassment.

"Did you? How naughty of you," Gray scolded playfully as he slithered forward. "Coming without my permission."

"As if I can stop something like that."

"I guess you're right. So, this is a dream come true, huh?" He knelt beside Natsu. "I've dreamed of this too. I've dreamed about how you would look, and how it would hurt you, humiliate you, binding you, immobilizing you." Gray's voice almost faltered as his body wanted to lurch forward and fuck Natsu wildly. "The feel of the rope as I wrap it around your wrists, around your ankles, knowing how it would dig into your skin, hurting and feeling good … that would definitely turn me on. Slowly tying you up," he huffed, and Gray gulped hard as his imagination began to overrun him. Firmly, he declared, "Let's do this."

Gray shifted to be by Natsu's head, where his arms were already raised and wrists together, waiting eagerly to be tied up.

"Remember, no fire. Don't burn them. I'm just wrapping it around your wrist," he said in warning. Gray diligently tied the rope, wrapping it many times and in a careful pattern that would hold Natsu immobilized while not hurting him too much. "Like that," he whispered as he worked, talking to Natsu to keep him alert. "Just wrapping it around."

Natsu felt the coiling and the tightness around his wrists and arms. Flashes of the past tormented his mind, being tied up, being held against his will. He panted as an old terror made his heart pound with fear.

"It's okay," Gray said soothingly. "Is that too tight?"

"No," Natsu snapped, trying to calm his racing heart. Hearing Gray's voice helped to keep him in the moment, not slipping into that frightful past.

"It's okay," Gray said again. He gazed down at the finished tie. Just that much was like a work of art, especially with Natsu's arms stretched above his head. "Now, where can I tie this to?" he wondered, glancing around his kitchen.

"Anywhere," Natsu cried out impatiently.

"No, you might pull away from me. Hmmm, I guess I could use the pipe." He tugged the end of the rope over to the sink and attached it to the thick drain pipe. "If you break this, you'll get soaked, so don't pull too hard."

"Whatever," Natsu grumbled, wanting him to shut up and hurry.

"I'm serious," Gray said sternly. "I don't want a broken sink."

Gray made one coil around the sink pipe and tugged sharply. Natsu felt his arms stretch higher, and he gasped at the tension.

"Is that okay?" He heard Natsu panting. "Hey. You're breathing heavily. If it's not good—"

"No. It's fine, just … it's making my heart race."

Gray smiled gently. "Yeah, me too. I like to watch you getting tied up. It's … exciting." His heart was pounding frantically in his chest, although outside Gray looked just as cool and collected as ever. He made a strong knot and then moved down. "Should I tie your legs? Yeah, definitely. You like to kick hard. Don't think I'll forgive that kidney kick you did on me last time."

"Oh. Sorry about that."

"It's fine. I'm gonna tie all four limbs, so you won't be able to move. Totally helpless."

Natsu moaned at that word. Yes! Helpless! Always, he was the one coming to the rescue. It felt good to be the helpless one for a change.

Gray saw the reaction and savored it. "You'll be completely trapped." Natsu's spine tensed in pleasure at just that threat. "You like that idea," Gray teased. "You like the idea of being … completely and utterly powerless."

He did. So much! "Gray," he moaned. He couldn't take more teasing.

"It's okay. I'm here. I'll take care of you soon."

Gray coiled rope around Natsu's left ankle.

"Ah … a little tight," Natsu said, cringing as one coil pressed into his skin too much.

"Okay, I can adjust that. You need to tell me plainly. No safewords, not at this point. Just tell me, okay?"

"O-Okay," Natsu whispered in a shiver.

"If you feel any numbness, you need to let me know. I … I've never done this before," Gray confessed, focusing on the rope. "So you'll have to help me through this."

Natsu was shocked. This was something Gray had never tried with someone else. This was an act that belonged to just the two of them. They were both virgins when it came to rope-tying. It made him feel less nervous to hear that. They could work together to make this feel amazing.

"Now, let's see. I can attach this to the table. Hopefully that will be enough."

He pulled the leg to the side. Natsu gasped as his legs were spread apart, exposing his entire groin to the cold air of the kitchen.

"It's okay. It's just your leg," Gray said to calm him. "I'm just tying it here. Now, I'm going to spread your other leg out." He made the knot on the table leg to attach to the ankle. Then he moved to the right leg, spreading it wide. "I guess I can attach this to my stove's door."

It was a far stretch, but the rope made it to the stove. Gray had to make a smaller knotting for that since the rope barely reached. Finally, he stood up and looked at his prey. Natsu was sprawled out on his kitchen floor like a slab of meat ready to be prepared for dinner.

Or maybe like an exotic dessert.

"You look good," Gray growled hungrily. "This is exactly how I want you."

Suddenly, Natsu gasped, and he instinctively pulled away, trying to break free.

"Whoa! Are you okay?" Gray asked, trying to judge Natsu's reactions to this. "Did I say something?"

"Nothing. It's … it's just a … dammit," he said frantically, still struggling slightly despite trying to calm himself.

"Natsu, if I said something bad just now—"

"I'm fine," he bellowed angrily. "Fuck, my heart is racing too hard already. Shit! I … I can't calm down."

Gray heard the table shift and squeak across the kitchen floor as Natsu yanked on the ropes. He quickly set the candles on the counter instead of the table in case Natsu pulled too hard and jolted the whole table over. Then he knelt by Natsu's head and stroked his hair. Natsu yanked again, making the stove door open a little, only to slam shut again.

"A kitchen is not the best place for this," Gray realized in hindsight. His bed would have been better, with the bed posts to tie the ropes to. "Hey, it's just me here," he said soothingly. "Calm down, Natsu. Just keep calm."

"I know! It's just … ugh, instincts. To break free. And … and something you said. Fuck, I know it's just a stupid memory."

"I'll cut you loose."

"No!" Natsu screamed. "Please, don't."

"I have a sharp kitchen knife right on the counter to cut the ropes. If you're ready to freak out—"

"No … no, I'm … okay. Just … the ropes." He closed his eyes, trying to banish a memory.

"Ropes?" Gray asked in confusion. It had been Natsu's own request to use rope. Why did it have a stronger effect than when Gray used his ice, or the handcuffs? Why rope? He set the question aside as he focused on his partner. "If it's not good—"

"No! I … I want it. It's … it's intense, that's all. Back then, that bad past, it was also ropes."

Gray jolted as dread stabbed through him. That taboo past…

"That's it, I'm cutting them," Gray said sternly, beginning to rise to his feet.

"No!" Natsu screamed. "I want them, Gray. Really, I do."

"They're bringing up bad memories," he shouted in worry.

"I want it!" Natsu demanded. "I'll be fine, just … you said something, that's all. I'm fine. Just need to forget that time. It's in the past, and I know that. I know that!" He scowled in frustration. "Dammit, I hate when I'm like this."

Gray knelt back down. He really was worried, but he decided to trust Natsu. If he insisted he was okay, then maybe this was a type of therapy, a little scary at first, but Natsu could work through it with help. Gray grew firmer as he became determined to help Natsu in any way, even if that meant skimming close to that cursed past.

"Just keep calm. It's me here. I won't let you be hurt by anyone else. I'm the only one who will make you feel pain or pleasure. Just me."

Gradually, Natsu's panicked breathing slowed. "Okay," he whispered. "I'm … okay."

"Are you calm?"

Natsu waited a moment, judging his own physical reactions. "Yeah. I'm better."

"Okay." Gray felt intense relief that Natsu had not completely panicked. "Do you need anything?"

"I totally lost my boner."

Gray laughed softly. "Yeah, you're limp down there now. The wax should take care of that. Are you ready for more, or do you need another moment?"

"The heat should burn away the bad memories. It's relaxing, feeling pain like that. Puts me in the present, y'know."

"Nope, I'm not a masochist like you. Still, if this will be better for you, then let's start up again." Gray stood and looked down at his strung up prize. "Damn, you're so sexy like this," he hissed. "My God!" He felt his cock ache at the arousal of seeing Natsu so helpless, immobilized, trapped, and oh-so-ready for him. "I love to see you tied up. I like … when you can't move."

Natsu looked up, feeling tiny as he lay there on the floor, with Gray towering over him. He was a helpless, tiny person, trapped, tied up, at the mercy of his captor.

"Gray," he whined.

The ice wizard saw quite a buildup of wax pooled in the pillar. "Let's use this. How about right across your chest?"

Now Natsu could watch the candle coming toward him. That waxy smell was everywhere, and he felt the heat as Gray brought the pillar down, starting close to the skin, not high up like before.

"Careful," Natsu whispered as he saw Gray starting to tip the candle to its side.

"Careful?" Gray scoffed. "You're the one who wants this."

Instead of letting it drip slowly, Gray immediately poured a stream of molten wax onto the center of Natsu's chest. The Dragon Slayer roared at the pain. His chest was far more sensitive than his back.

"That's what I love to hear," Gray growled.

Natsu growled, yanking on the restraints. "Arrrrrgh!"

"So sexy," Gray whispered, enthralled by the noise of his partner.

Natsu felt that liquid heat stream over him, dripping and slipping down his ribs. Then Gray brought the pouring wax up to Natsu's pectorals and across one nipple. Natsu howled at that, and Gray saw a definite twitch as his flaccid cock came back to life.

"Hey, not on my nipples," Natsu shouted.

"What, are they sensitive?" he asked wryly.

"Yes!"

Gray sneered sadistically. "Good."

He went to the other nipple and poured a large amount right on top of it.

"Yaaaaah! Ow! Dammit, that burns."

"Remember, just say Yellow if you don't like it."

Natsu breathed heavily through the pain. "No. More," he moaned.

Gray laughed and leaned down into Natsu's ear, breathing cold air onto him. "My little masochistic dragon," he whispered in admiration. "But now it's all built up and hardening. Let me rip this off."

He used his nails to claw loose the edge of the wax, and then he ripped it off Natsu's skin, yanking out hair and pulling agonizingly at the fragile skin of his nipple. Natsu's whole body clenched up so tightly, although it was horribly painful, no sound could escape his clamped throat.

"Sensitive there, huh?"

"Shit, that fucking hurt," Natsu gargled out. "Okay, Yellow. Don't do that again."

"Sorry." Gray leaned over and kissed his nipple. Then he licked it, making Natsu shudder and arch up toward his cold mouth. Gray sucked his nipple for a moment, cooling away the pain with his lips. He heard Natsu moan deeply at that. He pulled up, dragging the nipple with his lips, stretching it until it slipped out. Then he blew icy air on him. Natsu inhaled with such a tight throat, it came out as a squeak.

"Gray, that's making me…"

"Yeah," Gray purred, brushing the tips of his fingers against Natsu's cock. "It's making you aroused. You like when I play with your nipples."

Natsu gasped at the ghostly touches. "Sh-Shut up! More."

"No more wax in this one." Gray put the pillar aside again and lifted the taper. He had to light it again. Then he moved the dripping candle down Natsu's stomach, letting it splash onto his abdominal muscles, followed by a drop right into his belly button that got something like a scream and a laugh mixed together.

"Hah! Ow! Not there. Don't do it there again either. If it tickles, I'll go soft."

Gray moved the candle down to Natsu's lower belly, until the wax looked like white splashed dots all over the Dragon Slayer's torso.

"More, Gray," Natsu whispered, entranced by the brief spikes of pain. "Nipples again."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes," he said in desperation.

He brought the candle closer, letting it drip onto the stiff nub now red from being aggravated. Natsu clenched his teeth and groaned as the heat against the painful skin felt worse now.

"God, yes," he growled. "Closer. Hotter."

Gray put the candle so low, the wick was barely above Natsu's skin. He knew the fire would not hurt the Fire Dragon Slayer, so Gray smeared the bottom end of the candle, fiery wick and all, right against Natsu's nipple. The Dragon Slayer's body flinched, instinctively pulling away, while Gray smeared fresh, hot wax over his sensitive skin.

"Dammit, why are you always so erotic when you're tied up?" Gray hissed, wondering if he could last much longer. Already, a moist spot dotted his boxers. His dick was straining, wanting attention as he saw how Natsu's cock leaped with the burning drops pocking his skin.

"Gray! Touch me."

He laughed softly. "No."

"Gray," he whined. "Come on."

"No," he said simply.

Natsu's thighs tensed so hard, the table shifted. His hips shook from side to side, needing some attention to his groin. Gray placed a cold hand on his lower stomach, just above the curved erection, calming him down.

"Not yet, Natsu," he whispered, shaking his head with a devious smile, loving the eagerness and taking pleasure in denying him. "Not yet. Soon, okay? I promise. Soon."

"Okay," Natsu grumbled, trying to calm his needs.

Gray stroked back Natsu's pink hair, petting him for being obedient, even if only petulantly. "Do you want more?"

"Y-Yeah, okay."

Gray took the candle down to Natsu's thighs, but this time he dripped right beside his sack. Natsu leaped hard in shock and gasped frantically.

"Is that bad?"

"No! More!" he said with a whimpering of masochistic need in his voice.

Gray dripped some on the other side of his leg, and the drop of molten wax slid down before hardening, barely touching the edge of Natsu's testes.

"Fuck," Natsu screamed. "Oh God, yes! Gray, touch me. Touch me now. I … I can't take more. Please, touch me."

Gray leaned into his face. "I'm gonna make you come by just the heat of this candle."

Natsu's eyes widened. "No," he whispered. "I … I can't. Not on my own."

"It won't be on your own, idiot. I'm gonna make you so aroused, you'll want to come. You'll need it. I'll force you to come, and I'm not even gonna touch you."

Natsu shook his head. "I … can't."

"You can and you will," Gray said with a stern, domineering voice. Then his words dropped to a seductive whisper again. "I'll make you come, Natsu."

His eyes went wide with terror. That damned voice again … I'm gonna make you come, boy.

"But I won't touch you."

Natsu instantly calmed. It was not the same. It was not that nightmare. This was Gray. It was safe with Gray. He trusted Gray. He repeated this like a mantra to keep him in the moment, not drifting to that nightmare.

Gray smirked to see the terror leaving his face. "I'll make you so overwhelmed, you'll have no choice. Even without touching you, I'm gonna make you want it. You'll need it."

He pushed Natsu's cock up against his stomach to keep it out of the way. Then he dripped the wax right onto Natsu's scrotum. The Dragon Slayer screamed, and both legs yanked hard against the restraints, partly opening the stove door, which sprang back shut with a bang, and shifting the table so hard Gray had to push it back into place with his foot.

"Do you like that?" Gray dripped more out, pocking the wrinkled balls.

"Oh God, yes," Natsu howled. "Gyaaaaah! Oh fuck, that's so good. Touch me! Stroke me off, Gray."

"No. You told me not to touch you before, so this is your punishment for denying me. Now, I'll deny you."

"Please!" he screamed. Instead, the drops of fire-heated wax burned higher, up the vein of his cock, making it twitch and dance on its own. "Oh God … please, Gray."

"For someone who doesn't want to come, you sure are begging. Maybe I should burn that stubbornness of yours away." He put the flame close to Natsu's cockhead, dripping right onto the pre-cum beginning to leak out the slit. He could almost hear the fluid sizzling.

"Raaaaagh!" His cock leaped and surged, yet nothing came.

"Do it, Natsu. Come for me. Come … or I'll make you hurt." He dripped more onto the slit, completely covering it. "How about that? It's plugging up your dick now. Can your cum shoot off the wax? I bet you're so built up, it really could shoot that off."

"Gray … goddammit!"

He brought the fire close again, stroking the flame up and down the length of the cock, not touching the skin, but very, very close. Any normal human would have gotten blisters from a flame that close to their body, but Natsu only howled erotically.

"Gray … nngh … G-Gray."

"Come, Natsu."

"Dammit, touch me!"

"No."

"Please…" His hips shuddered. "Please! P- … Pl … Aaaaagh! Haaah!"

"Do it. Come for me." Gray watched in rapt fascination, expecting him to shoot off at any minute. The head of his cock was so swollen, so purple with the buildup, yet nothing happened. "So stubborn. You want it so badly, and I'm gonna force it out of you."

"Touch me," he snarled viciously.

"I won't." Gray brought the candle under Natsu's cock and let the flame lick the length of the curved erection. Definitely, a normal human would have massive burns, and probably they would need a skin graft with this sort of torturous burning, yet Natsu only shuddered at the feel of the flame.

"Gaaah! No. Stop. Graaaaay!"

"Do it, or I'll really hurt you."

He grabbed the pillar candle again and poured wax right down onto Natsu's cock and scrotum, covering them. Then he grabbed the waxen cock. However, instead of the hard jerking that could bring relief, Gray radiated ice until the wax froze and shattered away, making Natsu shriek so loudly, someone from upstairs thumped down on the ceiling.

"Are you okay down there?" came a shout from the neighbor.

"Shit," Gray hissed. He shouted up at the ceiling to the neighbor. "We're good. Sorry." He looked down. "You're okay, right, Natsu?"

"Oh God, fucking hell, yes!" Natsu screamed.

"Dammit, you're noisy," Gray muttered. "That's the first time the neighbors have ever complained."

Natsu began to sob. "Let me come, Gray."

"You can come any time you want, Natsu."

"No … can't. It … hurts."

"You know what to say to make it stop."

He did, but … Natsu didn't want the pain to end. He wanted to come. He wanted to prove he could do that much. However, on his own, with only the touch of the fire, he felt so restricted. He could not blame his loss of control on someone else. All blame, all shame, all guilt, everything rested on himself alone.

Gray eyed the inside of the pillar candle. It was half used up already, so he put it aside. "Should've bought more candles. Do you want the fire again? Is it too much?"

"N-No…" he whimpered, but then he growled. "More. Right on my cock. It hurts … real good."

"Dammit," Gray growled in sexual frustration. Dealing with a stubborn Dragon Slayer was harder than he imagined. He rubbed the flame over the skin. It melted away any leftover wax. Gray dripped more wax on, blew icy breath on it to harden the drops, and used the candle to make the wax melt again, streaking the length of the engorged shaft.

"Oh God!" Natsu screamed, yanking on the restraints hard as he trembled. "I … I wanna come."

"Yes, Natsu," Gray sneered. "Do it. Come for me."

"C- … Can't. I can't. For the love of God, Gray, touch me. Force me to come. Make me! I … I can't do this. Oh God, please! Fuck me already."

"Shit!"

Gray blew out the candle and shook any drips off. He rubbed the heat-softened wax onto Natsu's body, smearing it and smoothing the sharp edges of the drips from the candle. Then, with no preparation or warning, he slammed the thin candle up Natsu's ass.

The Dragon Slayer screamed so loudly, Gray was glad his neighbors were tolerant.

"Gray, what the hell are you doing?"

He pressed the candle in a little more. "Is this what you need? You need something touching you?"

"Touch my cock, idiot," he bellowed, but when Gray gave the candle a slightly deeper thrust, Natsu moaned louder.

"Do you feel that hot wax up your ass, Natsu? Knowing you, I probably could have kept the candle lit and you'd love it."

As the candle moved in and out, Natsu thrashed against the restraints. "Touch me," he begged.

"I won't, but I'll do this. I'll fuck you with a candle. How do you like that? Your second time being fucked up the ass, and it's with a goddamn candle."

"Gray," he snarled, yanking forward, ready to attack him, but the ropes kept Natsu bound.

"The candle wax is all over your body, and now it's inside too. I'm gonna mark you inside and out." He twisted the taper, and those dripping lines that ribbed it massaged Natsu's asshole in a sensation that nearly drove him over the edge right there.

"Nngh! Fuck, that's good. I'm so close. Please, stop your damn teasing and jerk me off already."

"Am I not hitting the right spot? Maybe … there?" Gray angled the candle slightly higher.

Natsu's body arched right off the drop cloth. "Dammit, touch me. Touch … nngh … meeeee. G-Gray." He felt his body nearing the edge. "Oh … gaaah. No!" he screamed, squeaking slightly as his cock surged, yet still nothing came. "Gray, fuck me."

"I am."

"Force me!"

Gray smirked. "I am."

Natsu opened his eyes and stared up at the arrogant ice wizard.

Is this forced? Yes, he's forcing me to come. He's making me. I … I have … no choice. No freedom. No power.

"Please," he sobbed as he felt himself losing control. "T-Touch … mmmh … Gray. I … need to … God, I need it so badly."

"Shit…" Gray hurriedly yanked off his boxers and grabbed his dripping cock. With one hand, he moved the candle inside Natsu's ass. With the other, he desperately stroked himself. "Dammit, Natsu, come quickly."

Natsu watched in wonder. Gray looked erotic, overwhelmed and reduced to stroking himself. Natsu's fingers twitched. He wanted to touch Gray, but then he realized he could not trust himself.

"Come! Quick!" he ordered with a desperate face.

Can't trust my instincts. Can't trust the monster inside. Can't trust I won't hurt him … or kill him. I'm a beast, and I have to be chained up. I can't do anything, not even make myself come. He has to make me … has to … to force me.

"Dammit, Natsu! Come on, I need it too."

But he wants me to. He needs me to. Never did someone … need me. Want, but not need. Gray wants me to come. He … needs it. He needs me. He's gonna make me … because he wants it. Needs it. He's … he's gonna make me come. Oh … dammit, I'm about to. I … I need to. And he needs me to do this. He needs … me … to…

Something cracked in Natsu's mind, and it snapped the coil tensing in his gut. Like a levee bursting and floodwaters surging, Natsu gushed out, coming hard with a cry.

"Gray! Oh God, I'm … arrrgh! Graaaaay!"

"Oh, yes. Like that," Gray moaned. As soon as he saw Natsu release, Gray allowed himself to let go and be overpowered by the lust and need. His head dropped as he came hard, splattering over Natsu's body. "Fuck, yes! Oh God, Natsu."

He tingled in the afterglow of the release and gazed down at the exhausted man under him. Natsu’s head dropped to the side, his chest heaved with labored breaths, and his cock dripped out the last bits as it began to soften. Gray felt such relief, but something more. He felt … proud.

"You did it, Natsu," he praised. "All on your own. You did it. Look at you! White wax and white cum all over you."

Then, he heard a jolting sob.

"Natsu?" Worried, Gray pulled the candle out. A tiny bit of blood streaked the white candle, but nothing too traumatic. Natsu shuddered out a cry as tears streamed down his eyes. "Natsu! Oh shit."

Gray raced to the counter, grabbed the sharp knife he had prepared, and quickly cut away the ropes. Then he grabbed Natsu into his arms. The Dragon Slayer's whole body was shaking. Gray felt terrified. Had he hurt him? Had he broken him? Had he inadvertently touched on some deep, psychological issue again?

"If it was that bad, you should have said Yellow."

"N-Not … not that." Natsu sobbed into Gray's chest. "You … needed me."

Gray stayed quiet, unsure what he meant.

"I … was never … needed."

"What are you talking about? The guild has always needed you."

"I don't mean the guild. I mean…" Natsu's voice cut off sharply, and he turned deeper into Gray's chest with a quiver through his body. "I'm glad you need me."

"Natsu," Gray whispered, stroking his hair.

In a sudden panic, he asked, "You'll never choke me, right?"

"Choke you?" Gray's face drew up, starting to really worry about what Natsu was saying. "I already said I wouldn't. We agreed, that's something we won't do, no matter what. I won't break your trust."

Natsu shuddered but nodded.

Feeling worried about him, Gray sadly asked, "Seriously, what happened to you? Were you raped? Tortured? What? I'm already assuming the worst."

Natsu gasped softly, and he began to curl into a ball. "Gray, don't make me. I … I can't…"

Gray slammed his eyes shut in frustration, but then he grabbed Natsu into a tighter hug. From the beginning, he had assumed this was the worst, but Natsu insisted he had been a virgin before they got together. So, it was not rape. Maybe it was even more traumatic than his imagination could dream up. There was definitely a lot more to this than just Natsu getting tied up and hurt in the past.

"Okay." Gray stroked his pink head. "If you can't say, you don't have to. I'll still be here for you, and I'll protect you. I need you, just as much as you need me."

He still wondered and worried what was this deep wound inside Natsu's heart, but he knew that a scab picked too soon only gets worse. He would keep healing Natsu little by little, until the day came when he could open up his heart fully to him. A sob hiccuped out, but Gray saw a smile on Natsu's face now.

"You … need me," Natsu sighed happily.

"Yeah," Gray whispered, caressing the pink hair. "Yeah, Natsu, I need you. I lo-…" Shit! He almost said I love you, but his throat instinctively clenched up before the words could be uttered. "I care for you," he said instead. "So much," he added with heartfelt agony.

Gray cursed under his breath and felt a tear drip out his eye, angry at himself that he could not say three words. How could he be mad at Natsu for not divulging a painful past when he couldn't even utter three stupid words?

"Don't ever leave me." Gray squeezed Natsu tighter, as if the Dragon Slayer might vanish just because Gray had dared to feel that emotion he could not utter. "Don't die," he whispered, shuddering.

Natsu looked up, seeing Gray's emotional pain. He took those cold cheeks in his hands and looked sadly at the teardrop that had slid down. "Gray," he sighed, using his rough thumb to wipe the tear away. "I won't die. No matter what we face, I promise I won't die. But you better promise the same."

Gray nodded. "The only person who could kill me is you."

That made Natsu flinch back hard, and a disturbed shadow darkened his face. "What do you mean?" His words trembled as he shouted, "Don't say that, Gray." He closed his eyes against some horrific memory. "Please, d-don't ever say something like that again."

"I don't mean I think you would purposely do that, stupid," Gray laughed, rubbing Natsu's arms to pull him back from some nightmare. "I mean that if I said the words I want to say, and if that curse fell upon you, and you died … I couldn't go on living. I know I couldn't. That's why I can't make myself say it, although I really want to."

"I know you do," Natsu said, calmer again. "You don't need to say anything. I can see in your eyes and smell in your body that you love me."

"Uh … smell? You can smell something like that?"

"Well, I can at least smell lust. Smells like bleach."

Gray barked out a laughed. "Idiot. That's semen. The whole kitchen reeks of it now."

He finished untying the cut ropes from Natsu's limbs. Then he rubbed out the red marks left behind, massaging blood back into the skin to get back sensation and heal the red marks quicker.

"Gray, thanks for doing this, really."

"Sure," Gray said, untying Natsu's other foot and rubbing out the ankle. "We could do this again, different candles, maybe colored ones. I wonder if I can drip an outline of the Fairy Tail guild symbol onto your chest to match mine."

Natsu chuckled at that. "I'd be surprised if you could draw a lame stick figure, let alone the guild mark."

"Asshole."

"Maybe you should take art lessons from Reedus."

"Keep up the smartassery and I'll rip the wax off your balls."

"God, that would be hot!"

"I know. Now I want to." He heard Natsu make a soft intake of air. "Are you okay? Does this hurt?" He rubbed the ankle softer.

"Not you. The wax is pulling on my skin as my cock shrinks. Hurts like hell."

"We'll get you into a hot bath, and I'll help you get it off."

"I'd love to have you get me off again," Natsu muttered hungrily.

Gray froze at the voracious words. He eyed Natsu up and down. "Could you let the wax down there remain for … half an hour or so?"

"You want a second go?"

"I want more candles. If I use that one over there, it'll smell like burning shit."

Natsu crawled over the drop cloth and straddled Gray's lap. "I'll leave the wax down there on, but I'll pick off the bits on my chest so I can feel it stronger next time. Go buy more candles."

A smile tugged at Gray's amused face. "You want more, so soon?"

Natsu sneered hungrily. "Yes. More."

"Oh fuck," Gray moaned as his cock wanted to harden up already. "I think I'll give you a little rest, though. I want to buy the candles at the sex shop. The shop owner who sold me these seemed to know what I had planned with them. I'm never entering that shop again. Damn creep."

"Did he try anything?"

"No, but he kept touching my shoulder, and I think he … um … propositioned me? I'm not sure."

Natsu snarled, "I'll burn him."

"It's fine. I should have bought them from the sex shop to begin with, but I was in a rush and not thinking clearly."

"So … sex shop candles?"

"I can ask them to sell me their very hottest."

"Oh God, yes!"

"How the hell are you getting hard again?"

"That's your fault."

"Then I guess I have to take responsibility, huh?"

"Yep," Natsu said haughtily. "And you better hurry. The wax on my cock doesn't hurt as much when I'm erect like this."

"I'll wash up, then go. Stay here…" Gray eyed him up and down. "…and stay naked."

Chapter Text

Gray walked into the guild hall feeling in a good mood. Yesterday's adventure in candle wax was a nice splurge after having nothing to do while Natsu healed. The flame-brain could withstand anything, which meant Gray could do things to the Dragon Slayer that he would never be able to do to anyone else in the world. If he ever got another lover, he would have to be a lot more careful.

"If?" he whispered to himself.

In normal relationships, Gray assumed the fun would only last a few weeks, or maybe a few months for more serious dating. Normally, he would think when he got another lover, not if.

He shook his head, blaming it on the optimism that was normal when a relationship is fresh and the emotions are still raw. He had dated girls before who he thought would last a lifetime, imagining that the lady would make a good wife. He told himself that this thing with Natsu was no different. Given time, the thrill would wear out, that old rivalry and annoyance would reappear, they would fight, they would break up, and things would go back to normal.

Except … he could not imagine that ever happening. The thought of Natsu suddenly getting bored with him made Gray shiver inside. He would simply have to keep their relationship lively, always pressing forward, which was why Gray had returned to the sex shop after Natsu left the other day, stumbling back to his and Happy's house in a daze from the endorphin rush of wax play. Gray went late at night and checked out erotic items he had only glanced at wistfully before. Now he had a lover who might let him do a hell of a lot more than he ever dreamed conceivable. Anything was possible.

And there was so much he wanted to try, at least once. He wanted to see Natsu restrained and pleasured in so many ways.

He saw Natsu sitting in the corner of the guild hall. He looked normal, not even a hint of the thrilling rush they had yesterday. Trying to act casual, Gray sauntered up.

"Hey, flame-brain," he greeted in the same tone he always used.

Natsu glanced up at him, and then turned away with an angry expression.

Gray froze in surprise. Keeping up a normal appearance before others was one thing, but the Dragon Slayer looked honestly furious. "Natsu?" he asked quieter, leaning over to be closer for his soft words to be heard. "Hey, what's wrong? Did something happen? Are … are you okay? Are you hurt? Do you feel sick?" A thousand worrisome thoughts plagued Gray's mind. He had made sure Natsu had no blisters on his skin after playing with wax, but what if something in the candles had done damage after the fact? Gently, he reached his hand out to Natsu's arm. "Hey…"

Natsu slapped the hand away, bolted up, and suddenly shoved Gray back, sending him crashing against a neighboring table and knocking over Team Shadow Gear's drinks.

"Get out of my face, bastard," Natsu snarled with flames leaping on his skin.

Gray felt like he had been stabbed in the gut. He watched Natsu march off, and a chill of fears ran down his normally ice-immune arms. Was Natsu going to break up with him? Had he pushed his limits too far?

"Don't mind the idiot," Gajeel called over. "He just hit puberty."

"What?" Gray asked in confusion.

Erza came forward and yanked Gray up by the hand. "He's not in the mood for your usual rivalry. He's just emotional today. It happens at this age."

"What are you talking about?" Gray knew better than anyone, Natsu was anything but a kid just hitting puberty.

Lucy turned around from her seat by the counter. "He's finally growing up."

"What the hell do you all mean?" Gray demanded. "What's wrong with him?"

Erza smiled gently. "You remember how it was, don't you, Gray?"

"Remember what?" he shouted.

"First love, discovering the flutters in your belly, worrying about what that special someone thinks of you."

"First … l-l-love?" he whispered, tripping over that word. Had Natsu decided to tell everyone about the two of them? If so, why was he angry and avoiding Gray?

Lucy tittered playfully. "Natsu's got a girlfriend."

Gray's eyes went wide. "A girl?" he bellowed, and he swung his head over to where Natsu had walked off to the mission board. "No … no, you're mistaken."

"No mistake about it," Lucy said. "Isn't that the case, Happy?"

"Aye," the blue cat said, and he began to sing in a taunting voice, "Natsu's got a girlfriend, Natsu's got a girlfriend."

"It's a really serious relationship too, apparently," Lucy added. "Natsu probably just doesn't want to be around you because he thinks you'll tease him, or maybe even be jealous."

"Why would I be jealous?" Gray roared.

Lucy put a hand on her hip. "Well, you're sure acting jealous. After all, Natsu's in a serious relationship, and you … well, no offense, but we all know you're … w-well…"

Gajeel said it bluntly as he spoke through a mouthful of iron bolts. "A drunken man-whore."

"I am not," Gray snapped.

Lucy chuckled. "At the midsummer guild party, you propositioned Freed because you were so drunk, you thought he was a woman."

Gray groaned at that and covered his face with his hand. Really, he was never going to live that down. "So, who's this girlfriend?"

Happy spoke up, "He didn't mention her name. He said Gray would just harass her, but Natsu said she's really pretty and fun to be around. I haven't met her yet, but he keeps sneaking out to see her."

"Sneaking out?" Gray shouted.

"Aye, he left for two nights in a row for a sleepover at his girlfriend's house."

The whole guild chuckled slyly at that, with plenty of winks to one another. Gray felt his world spinning. Two nights in a row … but besides yesterday's wax incident, Natsu had not been over to Gray's house in a long time. After all, he had been sick. Gray only occasionally checked in with Natsu that whole week while he was ill. What if some other lady was helping to nurse him? Was Natsu cheating on him? Was he sneaking around with another woman? He had thought Natsu said he wanted to be exclusive.

"I … had no idea," Gray muttered.

Lucy said lightly, "Happy was the one who noticed it this morning."

"Noticed what?" Gray asked in dreadful suspicion.

"A hickey on Natsu's neck."

Gray felt his tension snap. Was this about that huge love bite? "Hickey? Did … did Natsu say his girlfriend put the hickey on there?"

"Aye," said Happy. "At first he said it was a bruise from a fight, but I bugged him and bugged him and bugged him, and finally he admitted it was from his new girlfriend. She must be really strong, because he had bruises on his wrists and that huge hickey."

Mira tittered and repeated, "Bruises on his wrists. Who would have thought?"

Gajeel could hardly help but laugh as well. "Gihihi! To keep up with a fighting idiot like Salamander, she'd have to chain him down somehow. She's probably more like a man than a woman. Are you sure she's pretty?"

Happy nodded. "Aye, I asked, and Natsu said she's an exotic raven-haired beauty with skin like snow, enchanting blue eyes, and a perfect body. That's what he said."

Gray turned away, fighting a blush. Skin like snow, huh? He walked over to the mission board. Natsu stood in front of it, looking at the many requests, ignoring the whispers around the guild and Gray creeping up behind him.

"Hey," Gray whispered. "A girlfriend, huh? You didn't have to go that far."

Natsu did not face him, but he whispered so softly, only another Dragon Slayer would have heard the two. "Would you like it if I told the guild you're a sadist who gets his kicks hitting people with belts and watching them piss?"

"What? No!" Gray hissed, glancing around nervously to see if anyone could overhear them.

"I'll tell them right now, if you don't leave me the hell alone."

"Natsu, what is wrong with you? Are you seriously blackmailing me?"

Natsu glanced over angrily. "Then are you that determined not to let anyone know?"

Gray stared, confounded by the question. "Come on. Please don't do this."

"Why not?"

"It … It'd be too hard to explain."

"Yeah," he scoffed wryly, "like how I now have to deal with everyone questioning my bruises."

"What…?"

With no warning, Natsu spun around and punched Gray across the face. Gray stumbled back and crashed over a chair until he fell awkwardly to the ground.

"That's why I don't want to talk to you, bastard," he sneered. Then Natsu turned and ran out of the guild hall.

Gray rubbed out his cheek. "Son of a … Get back here, you flaming jerk!" He ran out of the guild to catch up with Natsu. In the far end of the courtyard, he yanked on Natsu's sleeve, forcing the Dragon Slayer to turn around. "What the hell? You better have a damn good reason for hitting me."

"It's your fault," Natsu shouted.

"Fine, but what did I do?"

"You … you don't want people to know."

"I told you, I don't care if people know that we're dating."

"But … you don't want people to know you're kinky, right?"

Gray froze, and the imagined scene of people finding out, staring oddly at him, whispering about him, keeping their distance from this sick sadistic pervert made him tremble with deep inner terror. "No," he said quietly. "I don't want anyone to know. Natsu, is this a problem?" he whispered angrily.

"It is now."

Gray backed up a step. "Because Happy saw the bruises on your wrists?" Would Natsu break up with him over that? He could not even fathom it.

"More than just that," Natsu grumbled.

Breathlessly, he demanded, "Seriously, what's going on?"

Natsu glared with flames licking his skin. He leaned in close to Gray and sneered in a whisper, "I just had to lie to Happy to save your ass."

Gray stared cautiously, stunned and confused. "Just because Happy saw the hickey and bruises? So what? It's Happy."

"As soon as Happy saw my neck, he said, 'Oh, you have a girlfriend. She must be really kinky to give you a love bite like that.' Kinky!" Natsu fisted up his hands. "Then he saw the bruising on my wrists. I don't think he gets it, but he told everyone else, and they definitely got it. They think I have a kinky girlfriend, and I had to lie again—lie to everyone—that she was simply into that, but that … that I … I didn't like it," he screamed. "I had to lie to the whole guild, and to Happy, my best friend. If I told Happy the truth about us, everyone would know it's you who's kinky. I know you don't want that. So I lied. I lied to my best friend. And that's why I'm pissed. I lied to Happy, of all people, and I just lied to the friends who are like my family, all so I could save your ass from getting humiliated."

Gray did not even breathe for a moment, completely overwhelmed as he realized Natsu had lied to save his reputation. Everyone knew now that Natsu was a little kinky, but no one in the guild would realize Gray was too. He had gone that far to save Gray from humiliation.

"Natsu." He finally exhaled as his eyes began to burn. Gray turned away and blinked rapidly, determined not to cry. "You … you didn't have to go that far."

"Well, I did," he said bluntly. "Now everyone thinks I have some kinky girlfriend, and I've been sneaking over to her house night after night." Natsu turned his back on Gray, and his shoulders bristled angrily. "I know it was my own choice, I didn't have to, but I did because … because I want to protect you. For everything you've done to help me this far, it was the least I could do to pay you back. Still, I hate lying to anyone, but most of all Happy. I've never lied to him before. So I'm a bit upset right now."

Gray dropped his head. He tried to imagine it, put it into some sort of perspective. If he had to lie to … who? Whom did he know who was as close as the bond Happy and Natsu shared? Hell, Natsu was like a father to that blue cat. Lying to his own son … Gray could not fathom the guilt that must cause. He did not have a friendship that deep.

"I'll back off," Gray muttered. "I'm gonna take a solo mission, get out of town for a few days, let this all blow over. You can handle it however you want. Plus this way they won't see the scratches you left on me. That'd just make things more complicated."

Now Gray felt stabbed with guilt. He had felt so smug about that love bite when he gave it, making it extra large, but perhaps it was a bad idea if it gave Natsu this much mental torment. If he liked marking his partner, he should be ready to face the consequences, and one of those was having the whole guild find out Gray was into kinky sex.

"I'm sorry," he whispered.

Gray turned and marched back into the guild hall. Inside, all was light and lively. The drama that happened in the courtyard did not exist here. It was almost surreal, going from that gloomy angst to a typical Fairy Tail day. All it was missing was Natsu leaping around demanding everyone to fight him.

Gray walked right past Juvia, who was about to bashfully say something to him. Hell, he did not want to deal with her at a time like this! He had messed up, he made Natsu lie, he hurt Natsu's feelings. All he wanted was to get away and not have to see Natsu sad ever again.

He grabbed a flier and showed it to Mira. Lucy glanced over his shoulder to read the paper.

"Ooh, sounds like fun. Mind if I tag along?"

"Sorry, Lucy. I'm really short on money."

"Oh," she muttered. He guessed she was too, but he just really needed to be alone for a while.

He got approval for the request, left back to home, but as he packed a bag for the journey, he walked over to a chest where he kept his erotic supplies. Inside was something special, something specifically for Natsu. Gray had really wanted to show it off today, but it was a bad time. Still, he lightly touched the chest, thinking about what was inside, wondering if Natsu would like it, and hoping that when he returned, the Dragon Slayer would still want him. He had decided when he bought it, that item belonged to no one else but Natsu. Even if things did not work out—and now he feared that they would fall apart so quickly—that item would never be given to another person. It was bought with one man in mind, and it could not belong to anyone else but that destructive idiot Gray had fallen for.

"Another time," Gray said to himself. Then he took his hand off the chest, packed a few more items, and headed out the door.


A week later, Gray returned to the guild, enough money to ensure he could pay rent, plus a little extra. He thought about asking Natsu if he wanted to do something fun, maybe a movie or karaoke, but then he saw the Dragon Slayer sitting at a table with Lisanna and Elfman, laughing happily next to the petite white-haired girl whose adoring gaze went unnoticed by the obtuse idiot. Gray remembered how angry Natsu had been. He wanted nothing more than to have Natsu look over, smile, and wave Gray to come join them. Instead, Natsu's eyes only flicked over briefly, enough to see who had walked in, before he continued with an impersonation of Laxus that made Lisanna laugh loudly.

Gray walked through the guild, easily ducking under a lightning bolt shot from Laxus to Natsu in order to stop the ridiculous mimicry. (The idiot totally deserved that!) He went to the counter and ordered an ice cream float. He had just begun to suck on the straw when Erza flopped down on the stool next to him.

"How was the mission?" she asked, waving to Kinana to get her the usual: in other words, strawberry cake.

"Not hard," he said. "I just needed the money."

"Even the easy missions help us to improve little by little," she said sagely. "Are you up to another mission tomorrow?"

"Well, I was thinking about getting drunk with the money I earned, but I guess I can keep it to just a couple beers. Is it a real challenge?"

"Not really, but I thought it would be nice to have the team together again. Lately, it's been hard to get you and Natsu together."

Gray glanced back to the Dragon Slayer who was a blackened lump with sparks of yellow electricity. "Yeah, I guess so. How has he been since I was gone?"

Erza forked some cake, but she looked at Gray curiously. "What do you mean?"

"His … uh … girlfriend."

"I don't pry into his private life. However, I guess he told the girl he doesn't enjoy being handcuffed, because his bruises are gone and there are no new ones."

"Is that so?" Gray muttered, not surprised in the least, since he had not been in town to give Natsu those sorts of marks. "So, uh … what do you think about that? About him? About what this girlfriend likes?"

"It is none of my concern," Erza said sternly. "Nor should it be yours."

"I mean in general," he clarified. "People who … uh … do that stuff. Isn't it … weird?"

"Sexual bondage is not weird at all," Erza declared. "It's nice to feel empowered."

Gray suddenly remembered some scene he had witnessed of Erza dominating over Mira while wearing dominatrix clothing. "Right," he muttered, realizing he was talking to a woman who had frigging seduction armor. "So do you and Jellal…?" His words were murdered by the threatening glare that burned in the Titania's eyes. "Uh … n-n-n-never mind. Forget it. I didn't say anything." God, she was scary!

Gray turned around to face the main hall, away from that dark aura. That was when he saw Natsu had been helped back up to the chair, washing his sooty face with a cloth. He was staring right at Gray. As soon as their eyes met, Natsu looked away quickly, and his cheeks went pink. Gray could hardly help but laugh.

"Like a damn twelve-year-old schoolgirl," he mumbled.

"What was that?" Erza asked, her focus back on her cake.

"Nothing," he mumbled. "So this mission, what time?"

"Meet at the train station at eight o'clock tomorrow morning, and bring handcuffs."

Gray choked on his ice cream float and coughed frosty liquid out into a napkin. "Wh-What?"

Erza looked over in confusion. "Handcuffs. You've brought them before when we went after a bandit. I figured they were part of your mission gear."

"Oh … y-yeah, the handcuffs. I'll make sure to toss them into my pack." He cooled his skin down with just a little ice magic so he would not blush. "Don't you have some?"

"My handcuffs are for bondage, not for capturing bandits."

"Erza!" he shouted, not caring anymore if he blushed.

She looked over undaunted. "Well, they are."

Gray turned away in a fluster. "You don't have to tell me."

"You're so prudish, Gray. We know you sleep around. Surely, the idea of bondage has come up in the bedroom."

"Even if it has … never mind," he sighed, deflating, unable to flat out lie to her. "Forget it."

"You should expand your options, Gray."

He glared over at Erza. "Options?"

"I would bet that your sex life, no matter how … busy it may be, is actually quite dull. Then again, when you're out drinking and roaming for a one-night-stand, I suppose delving into the kinkier side of sex is unnecessary. You really should try to get a serious relationship rather than sleeping with any girl desperate enough to hang out at a bar like a sottish prostitute."

"Look, I haven't picked up a girl in weeks. And I assure you, my sex life is anything but dull."

Cana suddenly sat on the other side of him, flushed with alcohol although it was barely the afternoon. "What's this about your sex life, Gray?" Her hand slithered up his arm in a sensual caress, and she leaned in, reeking of beer. "Not getting enough action from your bar wenches? Ya wanna try another romp in the Cana Carnal Cantina?"

"God, that was ages ago, Cana, and we were both drunk."

"So? You were rather … talented, as I recall." Her tongue dragged seductively across her upper lip.

Gray pulled away and stood up to get out of her reach. "I don't fuck friends anymore," he sneered scathingly. Then Gray turned and marched away.

"Oh yeah?" Cana shouted after him, not caring that the whole guild could hear her. "What type of people do you fuck these days, Gray? Enemies? Rivals?"

His muscles tensed sharply when she said that. He wanted to shout at her, deny it, maybe make up some fabricated declaration. He spun around to glare at Cana, realizing her shout, especially the perverted nature of the question, had garnered a lot of attention. He could not glance over to Natsu. He couldn't! Someone would notice if his eyes darted to the Dragon Slayer.

"Who I take to my bed is none of your concern. If I'm going to sleep with anyone, it'll be someone who interests me. Right now, I'm not interested in any girls." He was glad Juvia was not there to cry up a storm. He stomped toward the exit, desperate to get out of the volatile room before Cana said…

"What about boys?"

… that.

Luckily, Gray was near the door so all he had to do was flip a middle finger at her and continue out.


Since Gray was riled up from Cana, he had to work out his frustration. He went to a hill the wizards used for practicing magic. There, he could shout as he formed item after item of ice, pushing his limits, making things bigger, more elaborate. Anything he imagined could be created. That was the glory of Ice-Make. It was all a matter of imagining it and then making it into reality.

If only he could do this magic with everything in life.

He was mad at himself for making Natsu sad. He was mad at Natsu for punching him. He was mad at Cana for dropping what was potentially the biggest bomb about his relationship with Natsu, although it seemed like no one caught it, or they thought Gray and Natsu were too steeped in their rivalry to even think about doing anything intimate.

He needed to regain control over his life. He needed to sculpt the chaos into something tangible, visual, usable, orderly. Control!

He wanted to control someone. He wanted to reassure himself that something, at least one little thing in life, was within his control.

He needed Natsu more than ever.

On a whim, he made a statue of ice. A little magic, and the sunlight refracted differently, giving the ice the illusion of having color: peach skin, pink hair, white scarf, all created from his magic. He walked up to the ice clone and caressed the face. Natsu was always so hot, not like this frozen double. Still, it was a lifelike double, if he did say so himself.

"I need you, Natsu," he confessed to the ice clone. "I don't know how or when, but I've become addicted to you."

He did not hear footsteps coming up the hill as he continued to speak to the frozen copy.

"I always hated you, because you were everything I wasn't. Somewhere along the way, I realized that the reason you hated me back … was the same. I was everything you weren't. I think it was Erza who said it one day, one of her times trying to force us to be best friends. She told me, 'Natsu complements you, fills in all the gaps.' I didn't understand what she meant, and it didn't help that she went on this whole spiel about you being the strawberry cake and I'm the vanilla frosting. However, I think I understand now what she saw back then."

He traced the face of the ice clone, looking at how detailed he had made that smile. He loved to see Natsu smile, so naturally that was the most realistic part of this Ice-Make creation.

"You and I have a lot of faults. Most people, over time, learn to buff down those rough spots. Not you and me, though. You're fiery, burn everything to a crisp. I'm hard, jagged, like ice. Maybe in another ten or twenty years we could smooth out our personal issues, but until then…"

Everything he knew about Natsu's dark and mysterious past swelling up in his mind.

"I've dealt with demons, and you have some damn personal demons. I'd like to think that maybe, little by little, I'm helping you with that. As for me, I froze my heart a long time ago. I have this wretched, jagged, shard of ice in my soul that wants to tear everything apart. I can't melt it. I feel like if I open my heart too much, I'm going to freeze everything around me. I'll hurt the person who opened my heart. That jagged shard in my soul will shred that person to pieces.

"You're the only person I know who burns away the ice. As I open my heart … slowly … I'm no longer afraid of that blizzard consuming me and everyone around me, because I know you're there with me. You'll keep melting away all the ice inside me, until one day, I'll be able to find myself. With you, I can rage all I want. I can freeze and gain control, and you're still there, holding on, smiling no matter what I do. You let me know I can be in control, at least a little.

"Still … I'm scared," he whispered with a shiver. "I'm scared I might really hurt you one day. I'm scared of that ice becoming too cold, of me being too frigid, doing something I should never do, until I freeze your heart as well as my own. I'm scared that my need to control you, to bind you and humiliate you, to make myself feel a shred of worth, it's going to turn you into something else. If I'm the frosting to your cake, what if I smother you? What if I shape you into something you're not?"

"That's stupid."

Gray jolted around, wiping his moist eyes quickly, and saw Natsu standing not far behind him.

"It's the cake who gives shape to the frosting, idiot."

The ice clone shattered and fell in a sparkle of snowflakes. Gray shook as he realized he had been overheard.

"If anything," Natsu went on, walking forward, "I'm the one pushing you into the shape I want. I'm some lumpy, boring cake, okay on my own, but lacking any appeal. You don't smother me, Gray. You make me better, turn me into something presentable. I can't do anything on my own. You make me functional, just as I do to you. Frosting alone is pretty gross, but when it's on a cake, it's beautiful and delicious. Isn't that the case?"

Breathlessly, Gray shuddered out, "It's just a metaphor."

"Which is why I hate metaphors." Natsu reached forward, took Gray's hand, and caressed his knuckles with the rough pad of his thumb. "I'm sick of having a fictional girlfriend. I want my boyfriend back." Natsu wrapped his arms around Gray, squeezing him desperately. "I missed you." His eyes tightened as they threatened to spill tears. "I'm so sorry that I got angry at you. I don't want you to feel guilty just because I decided to act on my own. I really don't want to push you away."

Gray hugged him back. It felt so good to be back in those hot arms. Once again, the ice inside him was melting with the heat of the Dragon Slayer. "You won't push me away that easily, idiot. This frosting is gonna get on your cake somehow."

Natsu's eyes trailed down Gray's chest and sculpted stomach, down to the boxers that were all the ice wizard wore. "I like when your frosting is all over me."

Gray gave a soft gasp. Then he laughed and relaxed. "Well, I guess you cheered up, eh?"

Natsu let his hands slide down and rest on the ice wizard's butt, pulling him in closer. "No more talk of frosting and cakes. It's making me … hungry."

Gray's heart began to thump hard. "Did Erza warn you about the mission we have in the morning?"

"She told me." He pulled Gray even closer and rolled his hips up against him. "Which means we're free all evening."

"You're so predictable," Gray said with a smirk. "You only have that look when you want me to do something to you."

"Are my attacks predictable already?" said Natsu. His eyelids lowered as he leaned in closer to Gray. "I'll have to come up with a new plan."

"I don't mind seeing that look on your face." When Natsu began to lean up for a kiss, Gray pressed the shorter Dragon Slayer on the nose, holding him back. "I know how you get your kicks having me tie you up."

Natsu's narrow eyes flickered downward to Gray's crotch and saw the bulge there. He leered back up with a cocky smile. "And I know how hard you get thinking about how to punish me."

Gray chuckled and tilted his head to the side, eying the man. "Race you to my house."

"My house is closer."

"What I want to use on you tonight is at my place, and it would be a little awkward to carry that around town."

Natsu's eyes gleamed with salacious interest. "In that case…" He turned and bolted. "I'll beat you there, droopy-eyes."

Gray took off in a heart-pounding run. "You're the one who will be beaten, flame-brain."

Natsu grinned to himself and whispered, "I sure hope so."

Chapter Text

A few minutes later, the two burst through Gray's apartment, sweaty and breathless. Natsu collapsed into a chair and laughed as he claimed "I won, I won." Gray could hardly help but smile at the sound. He had missed Natsu's childish laugh.

"So," Natsu panted wearily. "What's up first?"

"Get some tea going," Gray told the Dragon Slayer through labored breaths. He wiped his forehead and curled his lip at all the sweat. "I need a shower."

Natsu leaned forward slightly in his chair, looking predatory. "Want me to join you?"

Gray's throat went dry at the lust burning in those eyes. "As immensely tempting as that may be, I won't be able to keep my hands off of you, and I have plans for tonight. Big plans. Get the water going, and on a slow boil, not the way you usually heat it too fast and steam the whole pot gone. Don't put the tea leaves in yet. I'll be right out."

Gray leaped into the shower and spent only long enough to wash the sweat off his body. He wanted to be clean for Natsu, not sticky from running across town. When he came out wrapped in a towel, Natsu was sitting anxiously on the couch.

"Your turn," said Gray. "Be thorough. Clean up really well, especially your ass and your neck."

"My … neck?"

"Just do it," he ordered.

Natsu left to the shower. Gray waited until the water was running before opening his chest of erotic goods and making sure everything was ready. He did not want to run to the store to buy something he forgot, like with the candles. Confident that all the supplies were ready, he rushed to pull on some clothes. Not much was needed, but at least pants. He tugged on some freshly cleaned jeans, forgoing underwear. He did not even bother with socks or a belt.

Then he rushed into the kitchen. That had to be set up as well. He put the tea leaves in the pot, poured in steaming water, and set a tea towel over it to keep warm. Then he quickly mopped the floor. That needed to be spotless for what he had planned. He put a bottle of water into the fridge to chill, and he made up some tuna salad. He had just finished mixing the tuna, mayonnaise, and celery when the bathroom door opened. He hurriedly put the bowl into the refrigerator.

"Are you making food?" Natsu called out.

Crap, he can smell it! "Just a little something for later. I figured you might get hungry."

"Oh?" Natsu chuckled slyly in the other room. "Gonna have me build up an appetite?"

"You have no idea," Gray mumbled, although he was pretty sure Natsu would be able to hear him anyway.

He walked out and saw Natsu standing in the center of the living room, gloriously naked except for the white scarf. Gray let out a soft curse as his penis tensed up at the sight of that toned body. The erection pressed against his tight jeans, roughly restrained, and reminded Gray that he also had to keep restrained. He needed to be in charge. It was time to regain control in his life.

"Like what you see?" Natsu asked smugly.

"I can think of how to make it look better," Gray admitted, which got a little pout from Natsu. Gray sauntered forward, tipped Natsu's chin up, and stared down into those narrow eyes. "You're getting collared tonight."

Natsu's mouth dropped open. "What? C-Collared? What do you mean, collared? What's collared?"

Gray smiled arrogantly. "You'll find out soon."

Gray walked over to the chest where he kept his kinky supplies. He returned and showed the item he had especially bought for Natsu: a collar to wrap around his neck, white leather with pink satin lining, a large stainless steel buckle, and a metal loop on the front where a leash could be attached, much like something a person would put on a dog. Embroidered in black along one side of the collar was Natsu's name: ナツ, and along the other side, ビッチ, bitch.

Natsu's collar

"This shows you belong to me," Gray whispered in a solemn tone. "I won't give you over to anyone. You're my bitch, my property. My Natsu."

The Dragon Slayer gulped hard. I'm … property. I'm his. I belong to Gray, and he's going to collar me, like a dog. Like a bitch.

Gray yanked the white muffler off and draped it over a chair. Then he wrapped the white leather collar around Natsu's neck, moved his pink hair out of the way, and adjusting it to be snug yet not choking. The strap slipped through, and he buckled the collar in. Then Gray took a tiny padlock, closed it over the buckle, and locked it.

Gray held up the ridiculously tiny key and showed it close to Natsu's face. "I have the key to unlock this. You are my bitch until I release you."

Part of Natsu's mind knew that was ridiculous. The lock was so tiny, he could have broken it with one finger. However, the mentality of it, being locked into his role, Gray stripping him of that bit of freedom and becoming fully in control over his life, was truly overwhelming. Gray tucked the key into his back pocket. Then he stood back to admire the leather around Natsu's neck.

"Is it a good fit? I can loosen it. I don't want it too tight."

When Natsu gulped, his Adam's apple bobbed along the collar. That slight pressure around him was a constant reminder. He belonged to Gray! Natsu's shaky fingers drifted up and felt the cold metal buckle and rigid leather.

Gray saw the shiver in his hands. "Are you okay? Is it not good?"

"No. It's fine. Feels nice."

"It should. That's a made-to-order patent leather collar with padded satin lining. I used up half my rent money on that thing. That's why I had to take a mission so soon. I even special ordered it in white in case—" His voice froze up.

"In case what?" Natsu asked sharply.

Gray had to calm himself again. "In case … we wanna try having you wear it in public someday," he said worriedly, wondering if that was hoping for too much.

"In public?" Natsu shrieked. "But … but you don't want any public kinkiness."

Gray smirked and leaned up into Natsu's face. "Then don't get caught wearing it. I wanna push our boundaries. Just the thought of it is … thrilling. Terrifying. Arousing. If you do get caught, blame it on your girlfriend."

Natsu's eyes blazed that he would bring that up again.

"I don't mean I want to do that today, obviously," Gray assured, "but … someday, when we're both used to this. It's something I would like to try, so I special-ordered it in white. That way, you can wrap your scarf around and it won't show through as easily. You can hide it, but the knowledge that you're wearing it—that you're wearing my collar in front of everyone, even if it's hidden—that's immensely arousing to me."

Natsu reached up and touched the collar again. "Having it in white … that's … thoughtful."

"I'm spoiling you way too much."

"You probably love buying these things for me."

Gray silently smiled. He had decided to buy this collar right after the wax incident. He had gone to the sex shop after midnight to avoid being seen, and as he inspected the many different collars they had for sale, he had gotten hard many times whenever his imagination dipped into how Natsu might look wearing this sign of ownership. However, none of those ordinary collars were good enough. He was lucky the sex shop owner was married to a leathersmith. She had her husband make up this special collar, and the owner herself did the embroidery. It was a totally unique collar, perfect for such a one-of-a-kind man. Now as he gazed at his fiery lover, Gray could not decide if he wanted to cuddle and pet Natsu like a cat, or fuck him wild like the dragon he was.

"One more thing. You're not too hard yet, are you?"

"I can relax if you need."

"Yeah, I need you limp for this." Gray saw that Natsu was only half erect. Good enough. He pulled out what looked like a black leather bracelet for a child, with three metal snaps for adjustable size. "Do you know what this is?"

"Not a clue," Natsu muttered, glaring at the strange item.

Gray smiled at such a naïve boyfriend he had. "Where do you think it goes?"

"That's not gonna fit on my wrist, I can tell you that."

"No," he chuckled. "It's not meant for up there." He leaned into Natsu's ear and whispered seductively. "It's a cock ring."

Natsu gasped, "Oh God."

"Don't get hard."

His eyes slammed shut, regulating his breathing.

"Good dragon. This will be tight, but if it's at all painful, let me know immediately. Don't hold back, I'm serious. It can cause real damage if you're not careful. Spread your legs a little."

Gray knelt and wrapped the leather strap around Natsu's cock and behind his balls, then worked with the snaps to see which setting was the best. He was glad he bought the biggest size the sex shop sold. He never actually bothered to measure Natsu's girth—that was a weird thing to do anyway—so the friendly clerk at the sex shop suggested one of these leather adjustable rings, that way Gray could be sure not to get it too tight, which could seriously damage Natsu in the worst way.

Slowly, he pulled the ring snugger until it squeezed the cock, then snapped it in place. Natsu drew up, but he was not in any pain. Just mild discomfort, a weird sensation, the blood filling up his cock but slow to escape. It began to throb in time with his pulse, the veins straining, like the blood pressure cuffs doctors used. In under a minute, he was outrageously erect. The bigger he got, the more he felt those pulses through his veins, and the more sensitive his entire groin became.

Natsu shuddered. "Oh God, that's good."

Gray sighed in relief at discovering he had picked the right size after all. "Now I can make sure you don't come until I want you to," he whispered sinfully into Natsu's ear.

"Yesss," he hissed.

"If it hurts, or if your cock feels cold, let me know right away. Don't even think you can put up with it. This will be way more intense for you if it works, but it can also be dangerous, so let me know the instant it doesn't feel good anymore. I can loosen it; it's not a problem. It's supposed to feel good, not be painful. Pain is bad when it comes to cock rings. I don't want you having your dick fall off from lack of circulation just because you were a stubborn dumb-ass."

"Got it," said Natsu. "It's fine right now. Feels … really damn awesome."

"I'm glad," Gray sighed. "Safewords will be important tonight. I'm gonna really push you this time."

Chills ran over Natsu's skin at the sweet threat.

Gray leaned over and picked up something else he brought out of the trunk. "There are other things I'd like to use one day, but for now … we'll start with the riding crop."

He showed the item to Natsu, a long switch wrapped in black leather, with a tongue of pliant leather on the end. The Dragon Slayer gulped hard as he looked at the device that would give him pain and pleasure. That gulp made him aware of the collar again and of the fact that he was Gray's property tonight.

"You liked when I used my belt. This is a bit more sophisticated, and a lot more exacting."

Gray dragged the leather end up one of Natsu's thighs and down the other. The muscular body shuddered under the light touch, and the trapped cock leaped in impending excitement.

"Tonight is about my enjoyment. My wants. My desires." The crop slid up Natsu's chest, gliding over each nipple. "Watching you on display for me. Using you to entertain me. Seeing how long it takes until you beg me to let you come. If you're a good dragon, I might even let you."

Natsu felt the crop dance up his neck. He knew Gray would never strike him somewhere truly painful, like on his face or neck, but the fear still tingled the back of his mind. As the crop glided along his flushed cheeks, Natsu let out a shivering sigh.

"God, you make me hard," Gray snarled. "Tell me. This cock." The riding crop brushed against Natsu's engorged shaft. "Whose is it?"

"Yours," Natsu rasped out breathlessly.

"That's right. Mine. I'm ordering this cock that belongs only to me." Gray knelt down, kissed the tip of the penis, and mouthed against the swollen glands, "Don't you dare come until I'm ready for it." That made Natsu twitch with need. He tried to trust forward, wanting that mouth on him, sucking him, devouring him. Gray glanced up, his face half hidden behind the trembling erection. "Do you think it'll listen to me?"

Natsu laughed with a shiver of lust. "Don't ask me. It has a mind of its own."

"True." Gray rose back to his feet, letting his body rub against the erection as he went, then he stared hard at Natsu. "I can't trust it, like I can't trust you. Maybe I should punish you both."

The riding crop flicked, not too hard, but it slapped right against the edge of the shaft. Natsu flinched. It was a warning tap, and his whole body came to life with it. With the pulsing pressure built up in his shaft, everything was far more sensitive.

"Heh?" Natsu laughed through heavy breaths. "You're gonna punish me? Do you think I'll learn my lesson?"

"You'd better, you cocky jerk."

"I'm a slow learner."

"Then I'll punish you slowly."

Gray flicked the crop again, this time on Natsu's upper thigh, and considerably harder. Natsu cried out, surprised he hit so hard so soon.

"Do you like that?"

Natsu panted. "Yes!"

He gulped hard, and he felt the leathery tightness around his throat. That feeling brought his fear of being strangled very close to the surface, but at the same time he felt secure wearing the collar. It was Gray's collar, and Gray would never do anything to truly hurt him. He was Gray's property. Gray would care for him.

At the same time, his cock was throbbing. He could feel his pulse shivering through the turgid veins. It made his attention focus even more on the erection, and the increase in blood heightened all sensations there.

Gray slowly circled Natsu, thinking of all the ways he could have this man, all the ways to humiliate him and pleasure him.

"Tonight…" Gray grabbed the metal ring hanging from the front of the collar, yanking the Dragon Slayer forward by the neck. Natsu cried out as his neck was forced to move, but from this angle Gray could not choke him. "…you're my slave," he whispered into the face of the stunned Dragon Slayer.

Natsu tensed up. "Gray, no."

"Tonight, your sole purpose in life is to pleasure and entertain me. This cock…" He stroked the stiff shaft, getting a whimper out of Natsu. "…is mine. This body is mine. Whatever I want to do with it, I can. I will order you around for my entertainment. I'm the only one who will give you pleasure. You can't do anything without my permission, nothing except breathing. You can't piss without my permission. You can't come without my permission. You can't talk without my permission. When I order you to do something, you will obey. That is what I mean by being my slave. It means I have complete control over every aspect of your existence. Do you understand, bitch?"

There was a tingle of fear. He was giving up his freedoms, and to Natsu, freedom meant everything. Willingly, he had to hand that over to Gray. Everything about him, he had to hand all of it over, trust in Gray, and give him everything: body and soul.

"Natsu?" Gray asked, looking a little concerned. He knew slave play was on the blacklist, and Natsu had insisted he did not want to be submissive. This was really taking their relationship to another level, pushing the limits of what was taboo, and he was not fully confident if Natsu was ready for it. Still, Gray needed this. He needed to regain control in his tumultuous life, and that began with controlling the one person he cared for so deeply. Without that foundation of trust, the rest of his life would crumble into chaos.

With a thick gulp, the Dragon Slayer nodded, braving the fear.

"Remember the safewords. Use them if you have to. Understood?"

"Yeah, got it."

"Say, Yes, sir."

Natsu dropped his eyes and frowned. "Can I call you something other than sir?"

Gray smiled arrogantly. "You could call me master."

Natsu glared at him. "Hell no!"

"Didn't I say you're my slave tonight? You will address me as Master."

"Fuck you! I'd rather call you sir."

"Nope, you'll—"

"Yellow, right now!" Natsu growled, stopping Gray with a jolt. He eyed Natsu's furious face with caution. "I've told you before; I'm not comfortable with the whole slave roleplay thing. We can keep doing this, but not as slave and master."

Gray immediately backed off. "Okay, what about as pet and owner?"

Natsu spent a while considering how he felt about that.

Gray caressed his face beseechingly. "You could be my pet dragon," he said, hoping to ease Natsu out of his foul mood and back into the scene. "Not a slave, but a beloved pet."

Slowly, Natsu's muscles relaxed. "Okay. I'm your … your pet."

"My dragon," Gray purred, stroking Natsu's cheeks with tenderness. He shoved back Natsu's bangs and forced his head up to look into his eyes. "A little dragon I need to tame. Call me kainushi."

Natsu gulped as he felt his humanity being stripped away, slowly becoming something else, something lacking that fierce pride. He was becoming a pet, and Gray was his owner, his…

"Kainushi," Natsu whispered. Kainushi: a pet owner. It was better than saying master, but only barely. Only mentally.

Seeing that submissiveness in Natsu's eyes tingled Gray's nerves. Having control over him, taming him, destroying his pride and taking charge over him…

He wanted to ravage Natsu, right now, but he couldn't. He was not worthy of his new pet. The pet was not ready for a treat. They both had to earn what was to come.

"First, a pet doesn't stand on two feet." Gray licked his lips before ordering. "Get on all fours, like an animal."

Natsu almost protested again. Some dragons had feet and the arms were the wings. Those sorts of dragons did stand on two feet. However, he saw the desire in Gray's eyes. Odd as it seemed, this small act was obviously important to Gray. Natsu wanted to please him. Besides, Igneel had walked on four legs. He would be like Igneel.

Slowly, Natsu dropped onto his hands and knees. His erection hung heavily in this position. Then, with the collar straining his neck, Natsu gazed up at Gray, awaiting approval.

"Yes," Gray breathed, transfixed by the sight, almost overcome by the sheer thought of having such control. He reached down and patted Natsu's pink hair. "Good dragon."

Natsu shuddered. Why did that little praise strike him like lightning? He wanted more praise. He began to crave it. He wanted to hear he was good, instead of always getting yelled at for being bad and destructive. He wanted praise instead of ridicule.

"One moment." Gray hurried to the chest and came back with a leash. He almost laughed as he thought about putting this leash on, becoming a true pet owner. It was giddy, arousing, and made him flushed with happiness that finally—finally—he could do something like this. He could finally have a pet who would obey him.

He knelt in front of Natsu, smiling with a bursting inner joy, as he clipped the leash onto the metal ring.

"There. Wonderful." He saw a pained flinch in Natsu's brow. "Are you okay?"

"My cock's starting to hurt."

"I'll take it off."

"No!" Natsu liked the sensitivity, but kneeling like this created too much pressure.

"We can put it on again later. That's the nice thing about this style of cock ring, something that snaps on. You can take it on and off easier. We'll build you up to wearing it for longer stints. I told you, any pain is bad. Now, up on your knees."

Natsu rose to his knees, but now he really felt how that pressure was becoming too much. Gray reached down and easily unsnapped the leather binding. The rush of blood made Natsu fall forward back onto his hands, gasping and quivering. Releasing all that pressure was too good.

"No … no, Gray!" he cried out, shivering. "Oh damn, restrain me, fast."

"What—"

"Restrain me before I fuckin' kill you!" he roared.

Gray guessed the problem, froze Natsu's hands right to the floor, and quickly began to stroke him. Five strokes were all it took for Natsu to come.

"Oh … oh God!" He shot out, but still the jolts shivered through him. "I … I still … feel it … oh God, it won't stop."

"Are you okay?" Gray asked, truly worried.

"Hell yes! It just … keeps…" He shivered as his cock jolted again with the blood rush. "Fuck, keep … feeling it. Oooooh, I love that thing."

Gray had to laugh at that. "I guess so!"

Natsu still kept feeling pulses of his own racing heart throbbing through his overly-sensitive shaft despite the erection shrinking. Gradually, and oh-so-deliciously slowly, those pulses faded as blood flow returned to normal.

"Okay, I … I think it's over. H-Hold me, Gray. Gonna fall over."

Gray undid the ice and pulled Natsu into his lap. He sat on the floor and held Natsu as the Dragon Slayer tried to catch his breath.

"I've never … never felt anything that intense before." He struggled to regulate his lungs and let his head drop back onto Gray's chest, utterly surrendering himself to those arms. That truly had been the most sudden orgasm of his life.

After a minute, and hearing Natsu's breaths slow down, Gray asked, "Are you feeling better?"

He nodded, still overwhelmed but relaxed now. "It just … I could keep feeling it, you know. Even after it shot out, I kept feeling … wonderful. Like it would never end." He looked up into Gray's face. "I wanna use that more."

"Definitely. That was hot."

Natsu laughed and dipped his head down bashfully. Gray tapped Natsu's shoulder, and he moved aside, scooting over the floor. Gray rose back to his feet and wiped his messy hand on his pants.

"Fetch your cock ring," he ordered.

Natsu simply crawled over since it was not far away, and he did not yet trust his legs not to collapse under him. Since Gray had not given him permission to stand yet, he crawled back to deliver it. Gray took it and patted Natsu's head before tucking the leather strap into his pocket.

"You learned how to fetch. Good boy."

Natsu glared hard. "Don't call me boy," he growled.

Gray jolted; he had forgotten! "Oh God, I'm so sorry." He knelt and hugged Natsu, petting his head like consoling a dog. "I forgot. I'm sorry. You're not a boy. You're my dragon. My precious dragon."

Again, Natsu felt a spike at the tender words and gentle touches. He shook his head, unable to comprehend how something so simple, so stupid, could make him aroused with happiness.

"Do you forgive me?"

"Yes."

"Yes … what?" Gray asked slyly.

"Yes … kainushi."

"Good dragon." He pet Natsu's head again. "But my little pet made quite a mess."

Natsu looked over and saw the splattered cum on the floor. "Oh. Sorry," he mumbled.

Gray hummed as he got a devious idea. "Clean it up." He yanked on the leash, making Natsu look up to him. "With your tongue. Lick it up."

Natsu grimaced in disgust. "Your floor is filthy," he protested.

"I just mopped. This is your punishment. Didn't I tell your cock not to come? You get to clean it up with your lying mouth."

Natsu wanted to protest. Licking up Gray's cum was one thing, but licking his own…

Gray swung the riding crop across Natsu's ass and scowled down at him. "I obviously have a bad pet."

Natsu flinched at the strike. "Gray—"

Gray struck him again with a crack of leather against skin. "Did I give you permission to speak? Obey!" Then in a condescending tone, he added, "I hate punishing bad pets."

Natsu loved the feel of that crop, but he also did not want to be a bad pet. He wanted to be good, to get praised, and to make Gray smile. Slowly, Natsu crawled over to the white, moist mess. Quite a bit had built up in the week that Gray had been off on his mission. His nose drew up at the smell. Reluctantly, moving slowly and stopping frequently with a hope that Gray might decide he was taking too long and clean it himself, Natsu leaned over. He glanced up with eyes begging not to do this, but Gray's face was pitiless. Feeling helpless with the collar, leash, and prone with his nakedness, Natsu stuck his tongue out and gave the mess a lick. He gagged a little, and Gray swatted him again on the ass with the riding crop.

"Clean it all up, you bad pet."

With tears of humiliation, Natsu began to lick the semen off the floor, choking it down. Gray bit his lip, amazed to see the mighty Salamander reduced to licking his own cum off the floor.

"Good dragon," he praised. "You're so good. Such an obedient pet."

That same jolt of pleasure shivered through Natsu. More! More praise! He wanted to hear more. With less reluctance, he licked the floor again, although the bitter-salty taste made him want to choke.

"That's clean enough. You did a good job. You ate it all up. I bet it's because you're hungry. Is my little pet hungry?" he asked lightly.

The last thing Natsu wanted was to swallow anything else. He wanted Gray to fuck him already. However, he nodded silently. A pet did not talk, after all.

"Good. I fixed something just for you." Gray gave the leash a slight tug, and Natsu leaned forward. "Come on, dragon. You can crawl. Come on. Let's go eat."

He tugged on the leash again, and Natsu crawled forward. He felt ridiculous as he rolled his eyes and went along with it. Gray led him into the kitchen. He opened the refrigerator and pulled out the water bottle and tuna salad. Then he reached far back into his cabinet and pulled out two large dog bowls.

"What the hell?" Natsu muttered.

"Don't speak," Gray warned. He spooned some tuna into the bowl and set it on the floor in front of Natsu. "Eat up."

Natsu looked at the food, then up at Gray. He did not say anything, but the narrowness in his eyes screamed, You're kidding me!

Gray put the water dish beside the food bowl. "I want to make sure my new pet is well-fed. Eat it. Don't use your hands."

Natsu stared incredulously. Then he gazed down at the food again. Was he serious?

"I made it for you," Gray said sternly.

Food made just for him! In the back of his mind, Natsu knew that if he obeyed and ate, he would get more praise. Still, it was humiliating. Not even Happy ate out of a bowl on the floor like this.

Gray had the riding crop in his other hand, and he slapped it against Natsu's hind side just hard enough to get Natsu to flinch. "I said eat," he said sharper.

With a growl, Natsu lowered his face to the bowl. He stared at the food. This would be messy to eat. Still, he had eaten sloppily many times, slurping food up with no sense of self-consciousness. He stuck his tongue out, trying to scoop the tuna salad into his mouth. At least it killed the bitter taste of semen. He swallowed, and his Adam's apple bobbed along the collar. Like a bitch! He turned over to the water dish and slurped up some. At least the cold water felt good, clearing his mouth and throat from the scent of body fluids.

Gray tensed up with erotic pleasure as he saw Natsu giving up his pride and obeying yet again. He bit his lip to hold in his excitement, and the hand still holding the leash clenched. The feeling of control was overwhelming. His cock ached, desperate to be freed from these jeans. However, humans wore clothes; animals did not. He needed to keep his clothes on just a little longer … as hard as that was for a chronic stripper like him.

While Natsu ate, Gray fixed himself a cup of tea. It was the dichotomy that really emphasized the roles. Animals ate out of bowls placed on the floor, easy food to eat, and plain water to drink. Humans drank in cups and sat at the table, drinking more sophisticated liquids. He sipped his tea and watched his pet dragon eating. It was a strange mix of emotions: burning pride that he was training Natsu so quickly, tingling tenderness as he watched Natsu eat the food he had especially prepared out of the bowl he had bought just for his new pet, and surging desire as he looked at that naked body bent over so far, with his butt up in the air.

Natsu licked up the tuna, thinking how animalistic this was, so degrading and … thrilling. Giving up his humanity! Acting like the animal Lucy often complained he was! After a minute, he got into the idea of chowing down on this food and even lapped at the water instead of slurping.

"What a good dragon! You were so hungry, weren't you? Poor, neglected dragon, so hungry you ate your own cum. You'll get good food from now on. I'm … gonna take care of you."

Natsu looked up, stunned by just how tender that last sentence sounded. Gray was looking at him strangely, almost as if he was about to cry.

"I'm always gonna take care of you," Gray whispered with an ache in his chest. Why was his normally cold heart now burning? Natsu had melted that ice away, and it scalded his ribcage. "No matter what happens out there, when we fight, I know you'll always have my back. I rely on you so much, you and all the others. But in here, just us, you can rely on me. I'll take care of you. I'll give you everything you want, because you give me everything I need."

Natsu crawled up to him, sat on his haunches at Gray's feet, and rubbed his head against his leg. Natsu rested his head down in Gray's lap and whined like a puppy, gazing up at him with wide, green eyes.

Gray began to breathe faster. Seeing that … changed something.

"No," he whispered, shaking his head. Gray rose to his feet, and Natsu sank back onto his haunches. Harshly, he ordered, "Get up. Get up right now, Natsu."

The Dragon Slayer gazed at him in confusion.

Gray shook and looked ready to break down. "On your feet, now!" he shouted, and his voice partially cracked.

Natsu hurried to obey, rising to full height. Suddenly, Gray threw his arms around him, grasping Natsu in a crushing embrace.

"I'm changing you," he gnashed. "You give me what I need, you obey what I say, you play along with my scenes, but … but this isn't what you need. It isn't what you want. I'm not paying attention to your needs. I'm failing. I want to be a Dominant, I feel that aching need to control something in my life, but … but I'm failing. I'm failing you. I'm making you do what you don't want."

"If I didn't want it, I'd say so," Natsu told him.

"I can tell you don't. Did you serious want to lick up your cum?"

Honestly, Natsu still felt sick at the thought. "I didn't say Yellow."

"Because you're too stubborn. I do this every time. Every fucking time!" Gray shouted as he clutched tightly to Natsu's hot shoulders. "I'm gonna go too far one day and push you away."

Natsu tipped his head down to look up into Gray's lowered face. "Kainushi—"

Gray screamed, "Don't call me that!"

Natsu paused, but then he pawed at Gray's chest. "I like the collar, kainushi. Can I keep it?"

Slowly, Gray raised his head, and his eyelids were pink. He snuffled up moistly. "You … like it?"

Natsu nodded with a smile. "I want to use it again. I like wearing it." He reached up and touched the collar. Natsu could hardly help but feel how similar this was to when Igneel gave him his scarf. It was a gift to make him feel secure, but that white, scaly scarf also showed to the world that he was the son of a dragon. "Ditch the leash, though."

With his fingers shaking, Gray reached up and unsnapped the leash. He set it to the side, out of the way, and faced Natsu again, waiting with anticipation. Gray had forgotten the most important rule about being a Dominant: it was the Submissive who really was in power.

"I can be your dragon," Natsu told him, "but not a dog. Dragons are noble and intelligent. You treat a dragon with respect. You don't talk to them like a puppy."

Gray considered what Natsu was offering. It was a chance to continue the scene, just with a few adjustments. "I may have met dragons, but I've never gotten to know one. You'll have to show me."

Natsu smiled and leaned forward to kiss Gray on the cheek. "I'd be happy to. But another time. Right now, I want more with that whip." He eyed the riding crop hungrily. "I was bad. I lied to everyone, and then I chased you away. I've been tearing myself up inside because of that."

Gray smirked at where this was leading. "You've been naughty. You need to be punished." He grabbed Natsu's chin and yanked it up. "Ask for it."

Natsu swallowed hard and felt the collar tight on his neck. He was still the property of Gray Fullbuster, and that collar would not let him forget it. Shivering with desirous need, he whispered, "Punish me, Gray."

Gray shivered at those words. Natsu really was an addictive part of his life now. "Onto the bed," he ordered.

Natsu hurried out of the kitchen. Gray put the food back away—it was still good food—and followed soon after. When he stepped into the bedroom, Natsu was on the mattress with an erection just beginning to reawaken. Before he got too hard, Gray pulled the cock ring out of his pocket and carefully snapped it back into place. Natsu tensed up with a moan of pleasure as that same wonderful pressure built up.

"Hmm, so what should I do with you?" Gray walked over to his special chest, dug into it, then returned with the padded cuffs. "You get the fuzzy handcuffs this time."

"Not rope?" Natsu had rather liked the tightness of rope, plus the fuzzy cuffs looked a little ridiculous.

"No. I don't want to leave any bruises on your wrists."

"I like the marks you leave on me," Natsu said with a lust-filled smile.

"I like them too, but I don't like people thinking you have a girlfriend."

Natsu smirked and cocked his head to the side. "Jealous?"

"Insanely so," he growled.

Natsu laughed lightly. Slowly for emphasis, he reiterated, "I don't … have … a girlfriend."

Gray glared. "You better not."

"Oh yeah? Or what?" he asked haughtily.

Gray pulled the riding crop up and laid the tip against Natsu's cheek with a threatening glare. "Or I would really punish you, and not erotically."

Natsu's light teasing died as he saw rage in Gray's eyes. "You're serious," he whispered in surprise.

"Dead serious," Gray sneered. "Don't cheat on me, Natsu."

"I wouldn't—"

"Don't! Just…" He stepped back, pulling the crop with him as emotions boiled. "If you're ever tempted, if you ever need … more … then tell me. Be honest. Don't go behind my back."

"Gray, I wouldn't! You know I wouldn't do that."

Gray hated the sad look in Natsu's eyes as he desperately pleaded to be shown a bit of confidence. "I was just…" He turned his head away with clenched teeth. "When I heard them say that about you, that you had a girlfriend, for a second…" He exhaled instead of growling, but still his whole body tensed.

Natsu sat up and reached out to him. "Gray."

Shaking with clashing emotions, the ice wizard gazed up sadly. "I can't lose you. Damn! Why am I even feeling like this?" he shouted angrily.

Natsu smiled sympathetically. "Because you're in love."

"NO!" Gray froze as the protest bellowed out. His eyes went wide, and choking on a scream, he turned away. "Goddammit."

"Gray, it's all right." He held the ice wizard around the shoulders. Natsu rested his head on Gray's chest and squeezed him comfortingly. "It's all right," he whispered.

Gray felt the security Natsu could provide, but … it was falling apart. His sphere of control was spiraling, the chaos was increasing, and everything was falling to pieces around him. He glanced back to Natsu.

This. Just this. One man. He needed to find control in just one aspect of his life.

Frigidly, he ordered, "Put your hands above your head."

Natsu lay back down and obeyed. Gray roughly grabbed his wrists, yanked them to his headboard, and slapped the cuffs around, tightening them painfully. Natsu flinched as the metal underneath the soft fuzzy sheathing pinched into his flesh.

"Ow! I thought you said you weren't going to leave any bruises."

"I'm mad now," growled Gray.

"Mad?" shouted Natsu. "At me?"

"Yes!"

"Wh-What did I do?"

Gray sneered down as he towered over Natsu, feeling powerful just in this. "You enslaved me," he snarled. The crop slapped Natsu's thigh, causing him to hiss. "You enthralled me." Another slap of leather, this time to Natsu's chest, right across a nipple, made Natsu cry out.

"I … I what?" Natsu's vocabulary was not the best. He wondered what enthralled meant.

Gray clenched the crop in a death grip. "I was the one who wanted to do slave-and-master, but that's because I know the truth. The truth is, I'm the slave here. I am completely enchanted by you. I'm addicted. I … I don't want to lose you. I can't lose you. I can't even fathom that. Yet every time I've felt … that emotion … I lose that person. It terrifies me, thinking I could curse you with my damned emotions. And it makes me … so pissed!"

Gray turned away, seething in anger.

"I spent years building these walls around me, so I would protect those near me. Then you come along and burn them all down. It makes me even more pissed that you of all people could do this to me."

Natsu stared at that cold, rigid back carefully. "I'd say I'm sorry, but I'm not. I think you need those walls burned down, just as I need my walls torn apart. I need you to tear apart every ugly thing inside me, shred it to pieces, so I can rebuild my life. You said it earlier, didn't you? We need one another."

Gray smiled to himself. "Cake and frosting."

"Yeah," Natsu chuckled. "Cake and frosting. So go ahead and put frosting on me, Gray. Take this ugly cake and turn it into something delicious."

Slowly, Gray turned back around and gazed down at the prone Dragon Slayer. "Sorry for freaking out," he muttered.

Natsu smiled with understanding. "It's fine. Come on. You can leave other bruises on me. That's okay, although probably not on my wrists again. If you don't want people to know you're kinky, we'll just tell people we were in a fight. Use that crop," he said, nodding to the tool. "Release all that aggression onto me. I can take it. Let's see what type of marks a riding crop leaves on me."

Gray picked the crop up to eye level, and then he gazed back down to Natsu. "Do you really want me to hit you that hard?"

"I want all the filth torn down, so I can rebuild."

Gray gazed across Natsu's body. Then, with no warning at all, he raised the crop high into the air and slapped it down on his thigh. Natsu teased up at the pain, and his withering cock leaped right back to life.

"Do you mean like that?" Gray asked with a sadistic smugness to his words.

"Yeah! More."

"Shit," he hissed. The crop slapped down again, hitting Natsu on the hip. The tender skin leaped under him. It was beautiful, enthralling Gray even more.

And that pissed him off all over again.

Gray felt something dark filling him. Control, but more. Punishment. Anger. Self-loathing. He felt a need to project those issues onto someone else, purely to save his own sanity. He cursed as he realized rage was winning over.

"Do you want me to beat all the filth out?" The crop hit the edge of the erect penis, and Natsu moaned loudly. "Tear you down from the inside, huh?" He slapped again, and Natsu cried out as the hit went over his chest. "Tear you apart?" Gray hit him again, but it was not tenderly this time. It was a strike filled with hatred. "So you can rebuild?" He hit Natsu again, not even caring where it hit anymore.

Instead of erotic moans, that time Natsu yelled "Owww," but Gray ignored the scream.

"Must be nice. Get hit a few times and it's all fucking rainbows and unicorns."

He swung the crop right over Natsu's stomach, and tears came to the Dragon Slayer's eyes.

"How goddamn nice that it's so easy for you."

He hit Natsu again, and this time the Dragon Slayer roared in pain.

"Is that really what you want? To be torn down, the filth beaten out? Because … I can," he warned menacingly, huffing out growling breaths. "I really can."

Viciously, Gray began to strike Natsu over and over, pounding the crop against him. Natsu tried to take it at first, but as blow after blow rained down with no mercy, he finally tried to draw up into a ball to shield himself.

"Gray! Enough! Yellow, yellow! Enough, dammit."

Gray jolted at the safeword. His wits returned, and he looked down to see red welts on Natsu's flesh, not even to erotic places, just beaten all over. "Oh my God, I'm sorry."

"It's fine, just … not so fast." Slowly, Natsu uncurled himself. Although Gray looked stricken with horror, Natsu laughed lightly. "Wow! You were really mad."

"Yes," Gray muttered between gasps for air. "I am."

"Fine. Sorry. Damn, that thing really hurts."

"Is it too much?"

"No, just … different." Natsu waited, staring up at the ceiling, but still, he felt incomplete inside. "More," he mumbled, and his eyes turned to meet Gray's. "Punish me more."

Lust surged as anger waned. "Shit…" Gray raised the crop and slapped close to Natsu's cock, just barely missing it. Those naked hips jolted up off the mattress as Natsu moaned erotically.

"Oh yeah, like that."

Gray's brow tightened as he felt power returning. "Do you realize how much I need this?"

Natsu chuckled in a lust-hazed daze. "I think I can relate. I need it too."

Gray stared for a long time, using the leather-tipped tongue of the riding crop to draw meandering trails along the striped, reddened skin. Finally, he muttered to himself, "Why is it you?"

Natsu opened his eyes and raised his head up to see. "Huh?"

Gray laughed wryly and shook his head at the irony. "Why is it you who can do this to me? Why not some drop-dead gorgeous girl? Why you?"

Natsu's face fell sadly. "Do you not want it to be me?"

Gray caught what he said too late. "That's not what I mean. It's just … weird, isn't it? We spent our lives at one another's throats, and now … now I want to lick that throat of yours. Instead of beating you in competition, I want to beat you to make you feel good. Why you?"

Natsu felt guilty and turned his head away. "I'm sorry."

"No. Hey, no!" He tugged on Natsu's chin to make him look back. "No, I don't mean it like … I … oh, never mind. Forget it."

Natsu watched as Gray turned his head away. "You … you don't really want this, do you?"

He jolted back over in shock and cried out, "What?"

"I mean … two guys. You're not gay. You sleep around with girls all the time."

"Natsu, that doesn't—"

"It does have something to do with it. You just said you'd rather have some gorgeous girl, not … not me."

"No! Natsu, I just—" He really screwed up, and Gray knew it. "Oh damn. I didn't mean that. For one, I'm bisexual, so I'm fine with you being a guy. That's not the issue at all. Two, I don't think I could do this with a girl. I'd be too scared. I know, deep in my heart, the only person I can do this with is you. Somehow, I just know that. The rival in me … hates that. But my heart … my heart doesn't care." His eyes teared up as he looked down at his restrained lover. "Damn me, but I'm falling for you."

Natsu's eyes brightened. "Gray!"

"Shut up," he shouted, shaking with overwhelming emotions. "Just saying that much … is hard. Really hard. And I'm scared now."

"Gray, it's gonna be fine, really," Natsu said consolingly. He wanted to sit up and hold Gray, but his arms were still handcuffed to the headboard. "Just because you lo-…" A stabbing glare from Gray killed that monosyllabic word. "You … uh … care about me … Gray, I'm not cursed. You're not cursed. It's okay to love—"

"Shut up!" he screamed. Gray leaped away from the bed in a panic. "It's not that. It's not! No! No, no, no!" He took the riding crop and slapped it against the back of his own shoulder.

Natsu again tried to bolt forward but was stuck. "Gray, don't do that to yourself."

Gray felt it was not hard enough. Too awkward of an angle. He whipped the front of himself instead, once, twice, two hits to the chest.

"Stop it!" Natsu screamed in horror.

Gray hit his thigh, his opposite arm, and then slapped his back three more times. He beat himself over and over with the riding crop as tears fell down his cheeks. If he could only purge this curse from his blood…

Natsu yanked hard on the handcuffs, panicking as he saw the self-hatred flaring in Gray's eyes. "Stop it right now. I'm serious, stop!"

Gray dropped the crop and collapsed to the floor. He sat hunched over, his head in his hands, staring ahead in horror. Visions of the past flew by his eyes.


There was a teacher who had been his first crush. Eight-year-old Gray stood shaking before her and shouted a confession that he loved her. The teacher gently pat his head. "Oh, Gray, that's so sweet. I love you too. You're my special pupil, after all." That was not the sort of love he meant, but as an eight-year-old child, it was enough. Two weeks later, he found his teacher crushed under the debris of his destroyed schoolhouse.

Another scene: a birthday party. His best friend from school got Gray a silver bracelet. It was too big, but it was good quality. "Aww, thanks. I love you guys," he had said to the gathering of friends with a joyful laugh. It was the last birthday he celebrated with his childhood friends. They had all died when Deliora attacked his town.

Next, a scene of chaos obscured by tears, blood on the white snow, and his mother's gentle words spoke n to him. "I love you so much, Gray. Never forget that. I love you. Now run. Hide! Run far away before Deliora comes this way."

Then the vision of Ur's smiling face as her love for him and Lyon brought her to sacrifice herself. "I'll seal your darkness."


"Mother," Gray wept. "Ur. Dammit … no. I can't. I … can't feel like that. Not again. I can't go through that again." He picked up the crop and hit his leg over and over again in a roar of rage.

"Red," Natsu shrieked. "Red! Stop it, please."

The safeword snapped Gray completely out of his mental trauma. He was out of the past and back with Natsu, in this bedroom, and he realized the Dragon Slayer was sobbing.

"Natsu?"

"Don't do that," Natsu pleaded with tears running down his cheeks. "Not in front of me. Don't!" He shivered in terror. "You're … scaring me. You're really scaring me."

"Oh, Natsu, I'm sorry." Gray leaped off the floor and ran to his side. He lay beside Natsu, hugging him closely and wiping his tears. "I'm so sorry."

"Don't hit yourself like that. Hit me. Beat me all you want, but … not yourself. Don't hate yourself. If you hate yourself, what hope is there for me?"

"I didn't even think about it that way. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."

As he held Natsu, he realized both of them had long ago lost their erections. The mood from earlier was thoroughly ruined.

"Can I just hold you?"

Natsu laughed and sniffled up his tears. "Yeah, of course."

"Let me unlock these." He reached up and hit a point on the handcuffs that automatically released them. He brought the arms back over and rubbed circulation into the limbs. Then he unsnapped the cock ring. Natsu was too flaccid to react like last time.

"Man, we're messing this all up," Natsu laughed lightly to lift the mood a bit. "Guess no one's perfect."

Gray felt secure in those strong arms. After a minute of holding one another, Natsu boldly raised his body, resting on an elbow to look down at the Ice-Make wizard.

"Gray," he said seriously. "I love you. I really do. I know you can't say it back to me, but … show it to me. That doesn't bring a curse, right? You love everyone in the guild, and we're all safe. So just show me, even if you can't say it. Show me you love me."

"I … I do lo- … lo-…"

"Don't," Natsu said, putting a finger to Gray's mouth. "If you can't say it, don't make yourself. I know all too well how it is, not being able to say something. I understand, and I don't need words. I need actions. I'm a guy, after all. So let's forget words. Show me your feelings. That's all I want. Come here."

He lay back down and pulled Gray close to his chest. The ice wizard curled into him, clinging onto Natsu as if his life and sanity depended upon it.

"Ugh! What a crazy day," Natsu declared.

"Yeah," Gray muttered.

Natsu held him until he felt those cold shoulders loosen up. Bit by bit, Gray's body unwound.

"Feeling better?"

"Yeah," he said in a daze.

"Still feeling horny?"

Gray chuckled softly. "Yeah."

Natsu examined Gray's distant gaze. "Ready for more?"

Gray paused for a few seconds. "No," he decided. "I need some more time. I'm trying to think." His face looked stern and contemplative. "What can I do next to you?"

Natsu laughed at how thudding and serious those words sounded. "Got any ideas?"

"None," Gray bemoaned.

"How about something a bit more … normal?"

Gray jolted out of his daze. "Normal? With you?"

"Yeah, normal. You can do normal sex, right? You don't always do kinky stuff."

"Yeah, but … but with girls it's different."

"Well, try it with me. Try just making love to me, normally. No hitting, no peeing, nothing kinky. Well, I still need the handcuffs, but besides that … just normal lovemaking. Please?" he asked softly.

Gray looked confounded by the revelation. Plain, normal sex?

"Is it too weird?"

Gray was still thinking through the concept. "I dunno," he admitted.

Natsu sat up again and leaned over Gray, caging him in with his arms. "I love you," he boldly declared.

"I … I care for you," Gray stuttered.

"I'm glad," Natsu said with a tender smile. Then he leaned over and gave Gray a gentle, lingering kiss. "How about we start with handcuffing me and putting that cock ring back on, then get some lube?"

"Yeah," Gray said in a breathless daze. Kink was one thing, kink could be done without deep emotions. All it really took was trust. Actually making love, though … was he ready for that?

He moved slowly to place Natsu's hands comfortably in the handcuffs. Then he snapped the leather ring back in place. Natsu arched up with a hum, knowing that if he was caged up, Gray would be safer. Then Gray drizzled gooey lube onto his fingers. Starting with just one, he slid it inside slowly and cautiously. Natsu moaned with pleasure.

"Like that?" Gray asked attentively.

"Yeah. God, yeah." He shivered at the feel, but something was on his mind. "Gray, do you—oh God!—do you really like that pet thing?"

Gray focused on his finger thrusting in and out. "It's something I wanted to try. I've never done it before, but I thought I'd like it. You … don't like it, do you?"

"Some of it was … interesting," Natsu reluctantly admitted. Suddenly, Gray's cold finger ran across the prostate, and Natsu cried out. "Yes, right there. Ahh! I … I don't like eating off the floor—oh God, yes—crawling around, maybe. Oh … nngh!"

"You're responding so quickly," Gray said in amazement, watching his body squirm. "Do you like the cock ring?"

"Hell yeah! Definitely. Oooooh, God! Definitely."

Slowly, Gray worked a second finger in. Natsu tensed up at that, and Gray gave him time to adjust.

"Natsu, you spoil me."

The Dragon Slayer laughed through a heated moan. "I spoil you?"

"You do. You agree to do things I wanna do, even though they're not your kinks. They're mine alone. It's spoiling me."

"Well, you're certainly—" Something sparked all through Natsu's body. "Oh shit! … spoiling me … nngh, fuck!"

"Is that good?"

"Yes! God, yes." Natsu realized Gray was only using two fingers still. "You're taking your time."

"I'm not ready," Gray admitted. "My brain still isn't in the right place. I like to watch you, but … I'm not sure if I'm ready for more myself."

Natsu clenched the bar of the headboard as his whole body shivered from Gray's cold touch deep inside him. "Then how can … kssssh … your pet dragon … aaaaah … help my kainushinngh … to get into the mood?" Saucily, he asked, "Do I have to bark like a dog or meow like a cat?"

Gray laughed at that, but he said nothing. He just stared down at his fingers sinking in over and over.

Natsu used his foot to reach up to Gray's shoulder, and his toes caressed the ice wizard's neck. "Tell me what to do. I want this to be good for us both."

Gray thought for a long time. "I don't know," he admitted. "All I can imagine is kinky stuff. What's normal? I … really don't know."

Natsu sighed. "Unlock one of my hands." Gray obeyed, but he kept the other hand chained to the headboard. Natsu reached up and stroked through Gray's hair, hitting what he knew was a weak spot at the base of his scalp. Gray gasped faintly at the touch. "Now, come here and kiss me."

Gray bent over him and gave Natsu a soft kiss. When he leaned back, he saw how Natsu was still waiting for more. Insatiable dragon! When Gray leaned over again to kiss him, Natsu's hand snagged up his black hair and yanked him down, crashing their lips together. They kissed hotly, wildly, hardly able to get enough of each other's taste. Natsu had missed this so much. Gray had the experience to know how to kiss amazingly.

However, it was Gray who moaned, "I'm addicted to your kisses, Natsu."

He chuckled and smiled up at Gray. "Is it good?"

"Hell yes."

Gray dived down and roughly thrust his tongue in, licking up that taste and the heat. Drool dripped along Natsu's lip and slid down his throat. Gray was utterly overwhelming him with just kisses.

"N-Neck?" Natsu asked, shivering in pleasure.

Gray kissed down Natsu's jawbone and to his throat. Then he went just below the leather collar and sucked hard. Natsu's eyes fluttered wide open. Being marked again! It wasn't enough that he was wearing Gray's collar. Gray want to leave a mark that would not be easily removed.

"Nngh … oh God."

"I love that sound," Gray purred.

Natsu purposely moaned louder. "Aaaaah … mmm! Hand. Lock up … my hand."

Gray grabbed the freed hand, slammed it to the headboard, and iced it there. Then for an added feeling of domination, he grabbed Natsu's pinned wrists with one hand while the other curled inside, stroking playfully just below the prostate, teasing with only occasional touches to that place Natsu really wanted to feel. The effect was glorious. Natsu felt those fingers so close, and he tried to thrust more onto Gray's hand, grinding down onto his fingers, arching to change the angle, whimpering as that sensation was denied to him.

"Do you want me to touch that spot?" Gray teased. Natsu whimpered and nodded frantically. Gray grabbed the ring on the front of the collar and yanked Natsu's neck up. In a low, seductive growl, he ordered, "Beg for it."

"Please," Natsu whined.

"Please what?"

"T-Touch me … in that spot. Please, kainushi."

Gray gasped, feeling his erection surge back to life at those words. He had to swallow a couple times before he could speak. "Do you want me to touch … here?" He let his fingers go higher to that gland inside.

The Dragon Slayer jolted. He thought for sure he would come, yet … nothing. The cock ring was doing its job, to keep him hard and not come too soon. He felt those fingers, the ridges of knuckles, all sensations felt so clearly. As Gray kept massaging small circles right on the prostate, Natsu began to go hoarse from moaning. He needed to come. He felt like he would have lost himself twice already, but the tightness of the cock ring held him back. It was painful, and it was wonderful.

"Show me more," Gray ordered as he kissed down Natsu's chest. He squeezed a third finger in at the same time as he suckled Natsu's nipple. Natsu's hips thrust up sharply, and Gray pressed the thighs back down to the mattress. "Your chest is so sensitive," he moaned.

Natsu did not want to tell him it was because the riding crop had hit his nipples, or at least grazed them, through many brutal strikes. "Looks like you're getting aroused," he said instead. Gray's erection was stabbing into his hip now as the ice wizard unconsciously thrust against Natsu's hot skin.

"Hell yes!" Gray felt the tight ring of muscles getting used to the intrusion, and he knew he did not want to—no, he couldn't—wait anymore. He raised up on his knees. Natsu separated his legs farther in eager anticipation, but as Gray looked down, he realized something. "Crap, I forgot the condom."

Natsu peeked an eye open. "Do you need it?"

Gray realized, Natsu was a guy so there were no fears of pregnancy. Still… "I prefer it if I'm gonna come inside. Makes cleanup quicker. I'd rather use it."

He luckily kept a stash in the top drawer of his dresser after one time having a drunken lady who was so horny, she refused to wait for Gray to get up and walk to the chest to get condoms. She had held him down and taken him bare. It was not until morning that Gray feared about things like pregnancy. As the woman put on her clothes, she had assured Gray that she was on contraceptives. He never heard back from her or received legal papers claiming child custody, so he supposed it was okay … which was good, considering he did not catch her name.

Gray ripped open the condom and rolled it on. Easy, and a good habit, he decided. He even added a little lube along the length of the condom to make everything easier. He grabbed Natsu's legs and hooked them over his shoulders. Then he lined his cock up with Natsu's hole and gazed down.

"Ready?"

Natsu nodded fervently and braced for the pain he knew was about to come.

Gray's hips rolled in, pressing slowly, one hand guiding his flared head in. Natsu jolted with a cry. It hurt … so good. It was only his second time being penetrated by an actual penis (the candle didn't count) so he was extremely tight, but used to the idea of relaxing. Gray felt the resistance and paused for Natsu to adjust. He added a little more lube while he waited. Slowly, Natsu breathed through it.

"Okay." He gulped hard and looked up into Gray's eyes. "I'm good. Try more."

Gray pressed hard to open Natsu wider and wider. The Dragon Slayer shivered out a moan so loud, probably half the street heard him.

"Natsu," he whispered in amazement.

Gray gave small thrusts, again and again. Each time, it got easier, and he could go deeper. Natsu's body was loosening, opening up quickly. At a time like this, he saw the Dragon Slayer at his most vulnerable. Right here, right now, Gray was totally in control. He was thoroughly overpowering this man. It was the control he needed so desperately.

Gray leaned his head to the side and rubbed his cheek against Natsu's leg resting on his shoulder. Then he moved his mouth, dragging his lips over the muscular skin, and suddenly he bit Natsu's calve. Natsu gasped. He loved the feel of teeth on his skin, and the thought of being marked aroused him.

"Do you like that?" Gray asked with a smirk. "It's better to mark you down here, where your pants will hide it. No one should be able to see that. No one but me." He leaned over further and bit Natsu's inner thigh, really digging his teeth in. The Dragon Slayer quivered and groaned in pleasure. When Gray let go, he saw pink bite marks on Natsu's bronze skin. "Do you like when I bite you?" he whispered lustfully.

Natsu hissed out, "Yesss…"

Gray slowly thrust in as he leaned forward, pushing all the way inside while folding Natsu's legs up to his chest and leaning over his prone body. His face was right above Natsu's, practically snarling down at him.

"How about if I bite here?" He caught up Natsu's lower lip in his teeth and pulled the lip out far, stretching it and biting it until he tasted blood. Then he let go and saw the tiny bit of red on Natsu's mouth. "You can tell people you bit your own lip," he said, smiling arrogantly. "You said you can taste lust within blood. Can you taste your own? Can you taste just how aroused I make you? Taste it. Lick up your blood."

Natsu's tongue swiped over the bleeding lip, and suddenly he arched up with a moan. Gray wondered just what he could taste. He leaned over and also licked the bleeding lip. It was just a coppery taste to him, but still, the idea of licking Natsu's blood was erotic.

"I wish I could bite you all over," Gray growled as he began to thrust hard into Natsu. "I wish I could mark every bit of your skin, then keep you here, keep you hidden away, so I can look at those marks day after day. All mine. You're … nngh … mine."

Natsu began to cry out as each thrust shoved him back across the mattress. Gray kept slamming his cock in, plunging into that heat like a lava pit.

"I … don't think…" Gray strained out, "I'm gonna … last long."

"Me neither," Natsu groaned through clenched teeth. "Fuck, too good. Too good! C-C-Can you take … cock ring … off? Off now."

"No," Gray said in a deep voice, sending shivers through Natsu's body. "You're gonna wear it until you come."

"Please. I really need to come now," Natsu begged. "It's … it's holding me back."

"I know," the ice wizard said haughtily. "I'm gonna make you keep feeling that need." He slammed in harder.

Gray remembered the first few times, Natsu had to indulge in a rape fantasy, screaming not to, needing to feel forced. That need did not happen with the candles. Gray had figured it was because the candles were less sexual than actual anatomy, but he realized those screaming cries of "don't rape me" were not happening this time either. He really hoped that meant Natsu was slowly healing from that tragic past.

"Gray," Natsu growled through jolts that rocked him, yet nothing shot out. "I need it. Gray, please, let me come."

"You can do it on your own," Gray urged as his hips pounded into Natsu. He grabbed the massive erection and gave Natsu aggressive strokes in time with his thrusts. "Come on, Natsu."

That pulsing throb that made Natsu far more sensitive now burned with Gray's cold touches. He screamed as any touch to his penis, any at all, was almost too much. Gray's firm hand thrusting all that built-up blood and frazzled nerves to life was pure, sweet agony, the most intensely erotic sensation he had ever experienced in his life.

Natsu's quivering screams pushed Gray right to the brink. "Almost … almost there."

"Graaaay!"

At hearing those cries and feeling the inner clenching, Gray lost himself. He thrust in deep and hard, gasping as he came, getting out random syllables of Natsu's name. "Nngh … aaah … Naaaaa- … -tsuuuuu!"

Yet still, Natsu did not come. Although spent, Gray kept thrusting in while stroking Natsu even faster. Then, thinking he understood the delay, he leaned over and bit Natsu's inner thigh again, this time on the other side, and dug his teeth in hard.

That bite undid him. When Natsu came, it was far beyond being simply intense. That pulsing hardness, the buildup of blood, made all of his nerves far more sensitive. That sensation rebounded all through Natsu's body. He felt such a rushing surge as it all exploded outward. He trembled helplessly as the most powerful orgasm he had ever experienced wracked through his body with white-hot bliss. If he thought earlier was good, it was nothing compared to having an orgasm with the ring still on his cock.

And it kept going. Just like last time, the cock ring made the sensations linger. Even as he softened and blood could flow back out, his groin tingled, his cock was still hyper-receptive to any touch, and the pleasure refused to fade away.

They sank, overwhelmed, panting and sweaty, with cum all over Natsu's stomach. Gray did not want to move. Ever! He wanted to stay like this, buried inside his lover, the hot and sweaty skin radiating up to him, collapsed in surrender at just how addicted Natsu had made him. He wanted to stay forever in a soft bed with Natsu beside him.

I never want to lose him.

"See," Natsu gasped weakly. "You can do plain vanilla sex if you want."

Gray chuckled and lifted himself up, gazing down wearily at Natsu. "You're handcuffed and wearing a cock ring. I don't think this counts as plain vanilla."

Natsu lightly teased, "A little strawberry cake to your vanilla frosting, then?"

That made Gray laugh loudly. "Oh my God, I am never gonna be able to see Erza eat dessert the same again."

They both laughed together in weariness. Finally, Gray gently pulled out, and Natsu hissed as that fullness left him. Still, Gray stayed hovering over him.

"Are you all right?"

"Yeah," Natsu said, grinning sleepily. "I'm suddenly really tired."

"Wore you out already?"

"That was the best goddamn orgasm of my life."

Gray looked down to the leather strap and traced around it. "Do you like this?"

"Oh, hell yes," he groaned.

"Mmm, I like that shudder in your voice." Then Gray caressed Natsu's cheek. "I like your voice." After a long pause, he slowly said, "I … like … you."

Natsu's eyes widened. "Wow! That's an improvement."

"Shut up."

"No, I'm serious. Really. That's a huge improvement. You went from I care for you to I like you. That really is a big step. I'm proud."

Gray felt his cheeks go hot. "Wh-What?"

"I'm proud of you, Gray. I wanna be able to take a big step like that too. I guess I need to catch up to you."

"You also took a major step, y'know. You were begging to come, instead of pleading for me to stop."

Natsu blinked in surprise. "Really?"

"Didn't you even realize that?"

"I didn't notice. It was just so good, I didn't ever even think for a moment I shouldn't want this."

"Maybe it's the collar," Gray mused as he unlocked the handcuffs, unfroze the trapped wrist, and unsnapped the cock ring. "It could be the mentality of being my bitch, giving up freedom, therefore everything, the entire act, is against your will. But … it was nice to hear you begging that you want it instead of begging to get away. It makes me know you really do like it. Breaking down those walls, eh?"

"Slowly, little by little."

"You're melting my ice, and I'm slaying your demons." Gray smiled down at Natsu and stroked his sweaty hair back. Then he leaned over and kissed his forehead. There was so much he wanted to say, but he could not get the words out. Instead, he reached up and rubbed where the collar met the skin of Natsu's neck. "Is my dragon ready to be set free?"

Natsu reached up and touched the collar with a disapproving pout. "Can we use it again?"

"It's your collar. You can wear it whenever you want."

"I really like it. I can't even explain it, but wearing it … it's like … like reassurance. I know I'm yours. I know you want me."

"Of course I want you."

Natsu's eyes widened. "Say that again."

"Huh?"

"What you just said. Say it again."

"I … I want you."

Natsu felt warmth all through him. "That's what it is. The same thing with the candles last time. You said you needed it too. Being needed, being wanted … that's the difference. That's why I could come and not pretend like I didn't want it. I knew you wanted and needed it too. Last time, you told me directly, but this time, it was the collar. It's the collar you bought to make me yours, so it shows you want me, and you need me. That makes all the difference."

"That simple?"

"It's not simple. You can be wanted without being needed … or needed without being wanted. A person could want you," he said hollowly, "without emotionally needing you. Or they could need you, need something of you, without really wanting you as an individual."

Gray felt a shiver tremble over Natsu's muscles. He caressed those inflamed cheeks, wondering what horror Natsu was imagining now that made him say something like that.

"But you … want and need me. Both. And that's different. That's okay. It makes it all okay," he whispered distantly, as if talking to himself. "I want…" Natsu said softly, "…to keep being needed … and wanted."

Gray pulled his body up to hover over Natsu, and he peered down fervently into those narrow eyes. "I need you more than you can imagine, and I want you more than I can ever say with words."

Natsu arched an eyebrow. "That's corny."

"Shut up. I'm being sincere."

Then he leaned over and gave Natsu a long kiss to show him without troublesome words just how he felt deep in his heart. Natsu's hands reached up into the messy black hair and grabbed at Gray's scalp, pulling their mouths together closer. When Gray leaned up, he felt like he would always be safe from terrors of the past as long as this burning soul was a part of his heart.

"I really should get this collar off, though," he said lightly.

"Uncage me, then. This dragon won't fly away."

Gray retrieved the tiny key from his pocket and unlocked the little padlock. He carefully unstrapped the buckle and pulled the collar off. Natsu's neck was a little irritated underneath from all the sweating. Gray wondered just how a leather collar should be cleaned. He would have to ask the sex shop manager.

"Shower?" asked Gray.

"Yeah, then sleep."

"I haven't eaten dinner."

"That's your fault. You made me eat off the floor."

"How about we go out for dinner?"

Natsu's eyes widened in surprise. "Just the two of us?"

"Sure, why not?"

"Wouldn't it be weird?"

Gray's hopes sank. "I … guess so. Never mind."

"No!" shouted Natsu. If Gray was willing to risk exposure just to have dinner with him, Natsu really wanted a simple date. "There's a place I know, been there with Happy, cheap but good. It's a small place, not many people eat there, nice and quiet … intimate. I don't want people realizing yet that I don't have a girlfriend, and that the kinky person who left those love bites and bruises is you."

"So, we keep hiding it?"

"I guess so, but I hate lying."

"I told you from the beginning, if you want people to know, it's fine."

"I know, I know, but … I won't let you be shamed. However, I can't lie to Happy. I can leave out details of what happened, but I can't lie to him anymore. I'd rather not say anything than tell him something that's false." He thought solemnly about it. "We'll wait for this girlfriend thing to blow over, then we'll tell everyone. We just have to make sure I don't get any visible bruises, and I'll sleep wearing a nightshirt so Happy doesn't see anything."

"The fuzzy handcuffs didn't bruise, but I did leave a hickey and some marks from the crop."

"Eh, it's fine. I'm tough. I think you have bruises from hitting yourself too."

He looked down at the pink stripes on his chest. "Oh. Sorry about freaking out like that."

"We can say it was a fight."

"…Yeah," he said hesitantly.

"Hey, we can tell Happy we had a fight and I lost and now I have to buy you dinner and stay at your place as a punishment. Yeah! Punishment for losing."

"He'll ask what I made you do for punishment."

"I'll tell him … well hell, I could tell him you made me eat food off the floor. People aren't going to think that's kinky. They'll just think you were trying to humiliate me."

"Do you know what's scary? That would totally work."

Natsu laughed lightly. "Of course it would."

"So … punishment, huh?"

"Yeah, punishment. I lost."

"But it's lying."

"No, it's not." Then Natsu ducked his head shyly to the side. "I lost … my heart."

Gray was speechless at that declaration. He wanted to say he too lost his heart, but he could not get the words to come out. "Let's go get that shower," he said instead.

Natsu had hoped for some reciprocity, but he passively realized Gray would never easily tell him that he was in love too. Just saying I like you was enough for now.

"Hey, Gray, can I spend the night here?"

"It'll lead to more rumors."

"I know, but … I still wanna stay with you. I missed you."

"I missed you too."

"I wanna take a hot shower."

"Ugh!"

"Oh, suck it up, crybaby stripper. Come on."


Not too surprisingly, they slept in, too comfortable wrapped in each other's arms. When they finally woke up and saw it was five minutes until eight o'clock, they dressed and ran out without brushing their hair or eating. They rushed to the train station only to see the train already heading down the tracks.

"Oh God, Erza's gonna kill us," Natsu groaned, imagining all the worst case scenarios.

"You were the one who hit the alarm clock and smashed it," Gray accused.

"It's not my fault that you have some crappy alarm clock that falls apart with a single punch."

"What sort of idiot punches their alarm clock?"

"I've always done it that way. Don't tell me you push a snooze button like some sissy sleepy schoolgirl."

"I wake up like normal people, not like a flame-brained retard."

"Sleeping Beauty ice princess."

"Ash-breath asshole."

"A-hem!"

The two had their fists raised for blows, but they stopped at the interruption of a station attendant.

"Are you two Gray and Natsu?" the stiff man asked.

"What is it?" they both snapped peevishly.

"A redheaded lady asked me to give these letters to whomever showed up first. Since you're together, I'll give them both to you."

Natsu and Gray snatched the envelopes, praying it was not something too scary. Inside were letters written in Erza's flowing script.


Natsu,

I understand you're in your first romantic relationship, but that is no excuse for tardiness. Perhaps in the future, you should think twice before staying over at your girlfriend's house. You had better be a gentleman to her, or I will personally show you how to show respect to women. Lucy and I have decided to do the mission on our own. You can go back to your girlfriend. I still want to meet this mysterious woman.

Erza

P.S. - You have my permission to hit Gray for also being late.


xxxxx


Gray,

I'm very disappointed in you. You're usually a reliable man. If you were drunk again, I'll make you feel enough pain to teach you a lesson in sobriety. Lucy and I have decided to do the mission on our own. You can go sleep off your hangover. If I find out you had another one-night-stand with a total stranger, or heaven forbid if you took up Cana's offer to visit her "cantina," I will threaten every bartender in Magnolia not to serve you alcohol for a month.

Erza

P.S. - You have my permission to hit Natsu for also being late.


They examined each other's letters, and then they both broke into laughter.

"Out with your girlfriend, huh?" Gray teased.

"A one-night-stand, eh?" Natsu joked back.

The Ice-Make wizard smiled. "At least you definitely are a gentleman."

"And you don't pick up drunk whores anymore," the Dragon Slayer pointed out.

"We can both assure Erza she was wrong."

"Yep."

"Yeah."

They looked at each other for a moment more. Then both boys punched one another, getting into a brawl right in the middle of the train station, laughing and feeling at ease once more.

Chapter Text

When Erza and Lucy returned from their mission, the Titania demanded to meet Natsu's girlfriend. Picking at his food without looking up, Natsu merely muttered, "I don't have one anymore."

That quiet confession set off an uproar in the guild. The room instantly fractured into three different reactions. Most of the crowd muttered that Natsu likely chased her away with his destructive habits and childish personality, and they let the Dragon Slayer alone to poke his food in depression. A few like Lisanna, Lucy, Elfman, and Romeo tried to console him in their own way.

"Natsu is still my best friend."

"Cheer up. You'll find the right girl someday, Natsu."

"It's manly to move on and keep looking for a real woman."

"There's gotta be a girl out there for you, Natsu-nii."

Then there were the ones who flat out mocked him. Gray was one of that crowd, although he looked on proudly as he shouted his insults. Who would have thought Natsu could act so well? Then again, just sitting there stabbing his fire chicken and muttering to the people around him was not really acting; still, to Gray it showed that Natsu wanted to put the whole girlfriend incident behind him.

Amidst the cheering and jeering, Cana shouted out, "Maybe she broke up with you because you weren't submissive enough. I bet she wanted to tie you up, put a collar on you, call you her bitch, and beat you with a riding crop."

Natsu turned solidly pink, but people figured it was merely because of the erotic idea. Many others went red, and two men in the guild got nosebleeds. Gray swore that drunken woman must be able to see what happened to people with her magic tarot cards. Cana's inebriated shouts were sometimes almost prophetic. However, she never once glanced at Gray as if to insinuate he was the one who did stuff like that. It was just an uncanny coincidence … hopefully.

For weeks, Gray and Natsu did little that could be considered kinky. They went on a few dates, made out at home without sex, and sometimes they just sat together, silently holding hands and staring at the stars. Then there were missions to do. Gray needed more money, Natsu had to take a few missions to cover food costs, and Erza dragged them both on missions to stop bandits, help local playhouses, and one was to catch a nobleman's pet tiger that had escaped. Work kept Gray and Natsu busy.

Still, when the team stayed at a ryokan, although they all slept in one room, Gray and Natsu gazed at one another in the moonlight with their futons side by side. Natsu's hand slipped over to Gray, slid under his covers, and caressed his arm. He really wanted to touch somewhere else, but even this much was pushing their limits. Lucy or Erza could wake up and see them. They had agreed to give the guild a few weeks to get over the chatter about Natsu's ex-girlfriend before saying anything.

Gray still was unsure just how they could announce something like that. Blurting it out was too embarrassing. Allowing themselves to get caught kissing in a back storage room had some advantages but was also shameful. They both agreed that they did not want anyone in the guild to think they had been hiding this, or else some people might feel bad that they were left out of this secret.

Then one day, Fairy Tail got a unique request. Queen Shagotte of New Extalia—the Exceeds' rebuilt homeland—requested the aid of Happy, Carla, and Pantherlily, but she asked that no humans be sent. The three Exceeds were happy to go visit their people once again, and they flew off the very next day.

That night, Natsu once again had a nightmare.


It was dark. He smelled mildew, blood, and something worse, something that smelled like bleach, only it wasn't. The smell made him want to vomit. Not just because of the smell alone. Because of what he knew it was.

Semen smelled like bleach.

His hands were tied behind him with magic-sealing rope, a lesson his captor had learned after getting burned once already. His legs were bound to a chair, spread apart, completely naked and cold in this damp, dark place. Hands touched him. He tried to pull away, but something sharp pressed against his throat. Natsu had numerous old scabs on his neck already, and some fresh ones, from where the captor had pressed the knife into his skin a little too hard as he struggled.

He hurt. He felt cold. Those touches used to warm him in a bad, sick way. Now, they did nothing but disgust him.

"Come on, boy. Aren't you liking it anymore? You didn't respond to anything yesterday, either. Are you really just a little boy?"

There was only emptiness and apathy in his heart. He did not care what this person did to him anymore. Nothing shamed him. Nothing hurt him. He had numbed himself to all sensations. He stared blankly into cruel eyes and let his mind slip to someplace else, a blank place where he did not have to feel or think or do anything.

"Dammit, at least react. Do I have to hire a slut to get you to respond? I can do that, you know. Some diseased, filthy whore that no one else will touch. Someone like that would do you, although you'd probably die young from diseases. Not like I'm gonna let you leave here alive anyway."

That was the worst of it. If he gave up and killed himself, he was dead. If he struggled too much, he could die. Even if he passively put up with everything, he would be dead someday anyway; his captor had said so many times. Dead now or dead later … and living in this hellhole was becoming too painful. Still, death was losing, and he was Salamander Natsu. He didn't lose to enemies.

A tear dripped down his cheek. That blank place was not letting him escape today.

"I … hate you," a child's voice said in the dream.

"Mutual, boy, I assure you, but you're gonna make me rich."

The only thing Natsu had left was hatred. Hatred and a prayer that someone would come. Maybe Igneel would show up, like he always did. But no, Igneel was gone. Everyone was gone. He was alone, and his screams could not be heard. He knew that already. He had screamed for days, but no one ever came. No hero stepped in just in time. Even when things got really bad, there was no last-minute rescue. He used to think Fairy Tail could magically rescue any of their friends before the worst happened, but not this time. He was on his own, a helpless and pathetic wretch, beaten and broken. He couldn't remember when he finally stopped screaming for help.

"You disgusting little pimple! Why won't you pop? Squeeze and squeeze, but you don't pop."

Natsu felt those cold hands suddenly grab his throat, strangling his neck.

"What if I squeeze here, huh? Will the pimple pop then? Did you know that cutting off your air can give you an erection? Or it'll kill you. If you don't do what I say, you're no use to me anyway."

The hands squeezed and crushed his windpipe. Natsu could not move to defend himself. He could not breathe at all, and his face was beginning to go numb.

"Do you like that, boy? Is it making you aroused yet? I'm gonna make you come, boy. One way or another, I'm gonna get what I want. I'll pop this pimple … or squeeze your fucking head off trying."

As blackness slowly took over, Natsu realized something. With those hands on his neck, the knife was away. Hatred flowed into his blood. His heart raced. He was getting aroused all right, but not from the strangulation.

Blood. He wanted blood. He danced in blood, drank it, splashed in puddles of it like a frolicking child. Showering blood, everywhere, all around, all over him.

"My God, Natsu! What did you do?"

"Oh. Hey, Gramps. He … popped."


Natsu bolted up in bed, screaming with fire shooting out of his mouth. His hammock caught ablaze, snapped, and he fell to the ground with a loud thump. He quickly put out the flames, and then he looked around in the darkness.

It was too dark. Blackness, a dark room, just like back then, like that place with the bad smell. Natsu turned on some lights, and the familiar house lit up around him. His breath came quickly and heavily, laboring as his heart pounded so fast, it hurt his chest.

"Happy?" he called out meekly, but he knew his friend was gone. Natsu collapsed onto the floor and curled into a fetal position. "No ... no, no, no!" He sobbed and grabbed around his knees, shrinking down as if he could hide from those disgusting, terrifying hands. Just curl into a ball and hide away, like the child in that dream. "Why?" he screamed. The tears refused to stop. "Why do I still dream about that? Goddamn memory, get out of my head."

He wept into his legs and began to rock himself, unable to stop the convulsive sobs. Then suddenly he scrambled back to the bed, snatched the white scarf, and wrapped it around his neck. Only that scarf freed him from the chokehold's sensation, yet those strangling hands were only a small part of the nightmare. He felt those cold hands still, like filthy leaches slithering over his skin, and he rubbed himself all over, trying to rid himself of the sick feeling. His lungs convulsed as the dream still haunted him.

"I just want to forget. I just ... want to forget it."

He knew he needed to get out, get away, run away from the man's taunting voice and the smell of blood. Natsu bolted out the door and ran in a frantic sprint, racing through the moonlit forest and down the hill toward Magnolia. The smell would not leave his nose, even when he entered the town that was plunged in midnight sleep.

He ran to a park, hoping the flowers would chase away the stench, but the odor was in his mind. Nothing would purge it, just as nothing could stop the feel of those hands on his body. Rubbing his arms, hitting himself, slapping the skin, nothing purged the ghostly fingers.

Natsu raised his head up to the stars and screamed, "I hate this," as hot tears tumbled down his cheeks. He collapsed onto the grass, and again he curled into himself. "I hate it," he sobbed quietly. He stared forward into the shadows. "I hate what he made me do. I hate ... what he turned me into."

He felt filthy, disgusting, like ... like a pimple. Like a disgusting pimple.

Only one person made things better. Only one person purged the filth and made him clean.

"Gray," he whispered. The tenderness of those icy touches was nothing at all like the other person's hands. The fingers of the ice wizard had given him true pleasure. He only felt safe and needed in those arms. "Gray..."

He needed Gray. He needed to feel touches that did not make him want to vomit.

Maybe the emotions were getting to him, but Natsu blanked out. He had a sense that he wandered, but he had no clue where he was going until he realized he was at Gray's window.

"How appropriate," he muttered wryly. After all, this was how the whole thing started: a nightmare, seeking someone in the night, and winding up at this house.

He lifted the window, but the squeak of it woke the ice wizard up instantly. Natsu just barely dodged a spear of ice aimed at him.

"Dammit, Gray."

"Natsu?" he yawned, blinking his bleary eyes. "What the hell?"

"Ask 'who's there' first before trying to stab someone, jerk."

"What idiot sneaks into people's houses in the middle of the night? Well, then again, that's normal for you, I guess. So, what are you doing here?"

"Couldn't sleep," he said, coming inside completely and shutting the window behind him.

"Oh God, Happy's gone for one day and you can't sleep alone? Are you really just a kid?"

That dream haunted him. Are you really just a little boy?

Gray heard the sharp gasp and saw the tightness in Natsu's brow. Something had triggered him again. "Fine, come on and share my bed."

Natsu hurried forward and dived under the covers like a cat called out of the rain. Shelter! Security! Being wanted! Being needed!

Gray wrapped his arms around the Dragon Slayer and tried to fall back to sleep; however, the fidgets and occasional sighs of irritation showed him that Natsu was not just going to drift off to sleep.

"Ya need to talk about it?" he sleepily offered.

"I ... can't."

That issue again! "Tell me what you need."

"You sound barely awake."

"Because I'm practically asleep."

"I don't want to bother you."

"Well, you are, so you might as well annoy me more. Do you need warm milk? A shoulder massage? Tell me so you can fall asleep, that way I can fall asleep."

Natsu was quiet for a long time as images of the dream flitted past his mind. At least here, the smell vanished. Wrapped up in Gray's arms like this made him smell nothing else but the scent of pine trees and snow.

"Gray, how do you deal with nightmares?"

"Nightmares?" he asked, waking more. "I don't even know how to deal with my own."

Natsu rolled over to look at him in surprise. "You get nightmares?"

"Sure. Everyone does."

"What are yours like?"

Gray glared into the shadows. "The day my town was destroyed by Deliora. I had to watch friends get crushed, my home burned, my parents ... killed." His voice shuddered as he choked up. "They died defending me from that demon. Its voice ... is a nightmare. I'll never forget that day," he whispered darkly. "It still frightens me. Whenever I meet up with a demon, I get a flashback to that day. I freeze up in terror. I feel like I'm that helpless child again," he sneered with tears in his eyes. "A stupid kid who can't do anything but cry for a mother ... who was ... crushed to death ... in front of my eyes."

In sympathy, Natsu touched Gray's arm and whispered his name.

"I'm fine, sorry," he whispered, wiping his eyes. "So, what about yours? I told you; you tell me."

Natsu looked aside. He had never told anyone, not even Happy, but after Gray divulged such a weakness, it was only fair.

"It has to do with why I freak out," he muttered.

That immediately put Gray on alert. Those incidents had worried him for some time.

"It was a couple of occasions, I guess. The first happened when I was little, I'm not sure how old, probably no more than four or five. I wandered away from Igneel's place while he was gone hunting. I met up with some bandits and got caught. My magic sucked back then," he said in his own defense.

"It's a miracle you knew any magic at that age," Gray admitted. Four or five! Gray didn't learn magic until he was eight.

"They chained me up ... t-tortured me," he whispered in an old nightmare. "Nearly choked me to death." Natsu's hand touched his throat with a distant memory of terror. "It took a full day before Igneel returned and found them." He laughed softly in pride. "He burned the whole building down to rescue me."

Gray saw that this one bit of memory was sweet to Natsu, and Igneel's destructive solution explained so much about Natsu's fighting style.

"I don't remember much after that, but I know I kept having nightmares. It took me months before I could be outdoors on my own. It was a big problem, since Igneel frequently had to leave." He laughed miserably. "I wet myself a few times, until Igneel would leave behind a bucket. Once, we ran out of food. I could have gathered berries growing right outside the cave, but ... I couldn't step outside. Not alone. I was too scared." Natsu laughed off the youthful stupidity. "I almost starved," he said lightly. "I was also scared of anything brushing against my throat, even my own hair. I kept thinking of ... them ... choking me. That's when Igneel gave me this scarf. It helped, the nightmares stopped, and having something always against my neck desensitized me from that fear.

"Then, about two years after joining Fairy Tail, I was on a mission that went bad. The guy ... strangled me until I went unconscious." Natsu shuddered slightly and touched his throat again. "When I came to, I was tied up in a dark room. It was that childhood terror all over again. I was back in that nightmare. The enemy came back and he ... he..."

Gray felt Natsu shiver hard.

"I never told anyone," Natsu said as a distraction as he wiped his nose. "We've all had 'the mission that went bad,' right? The mission we don't want to talk about."

"Sure," said Gray. "I've had a few nasty ones myself. And you're right, we usually don't talk about them."

"Exactly. But that one in particular..."

His voice faded away, and for a solid minute, Natsu stared out, trapped by the memory. Then he suddenly gasped and sniffled. His trembling hand reached up to touch his throat yet again. Gray wrapped his arm around Natsu's shoulder in comfort.

"You can tell me," he spoke in a low, calming tone. "I'll keep it secret."

Natsu knew he could trust Gray now. They had done so much that demanded implicit trust. He gulped hard and went on. "He ... did things ... to me," he whispered, but then anger surged up. "I was still a kid. A goddamn fucking kid! I didn't even know what he was trying to do at first. He said something about ... samples. Thinking back, it was likely sperm samples, since I'm a Dragon Slayer. Maybe trying to ... to breed one."

"Oh God," Gray whispered in horror. That was one of those missing pieces of the puzzle. Natsu had panicked when Gray mentioned coming into a cup. He could not have his semen in anything. It suddenly made sense.

"I didn't understand any of it back then. I had never ... you know ... shot off like that. But he touched me ... until I did ... for the very first time." In tears, Natsu sneered. "My first orgasm ... was to that man's hands. And it wasn't just once. I was trapped for over two weeks. He did that to me ... every day," he snarled. "A few times a day." Natsu choked up for a moment and gulped down his tears. "He would use ... different ways, things that would ... would help me, things that would make it feel better."

Gray's stomach surged. To a child?

In choking sobs, Natsu went on. "I didn't want to give in to what he wanted. Not at all." His arm swung out as he declared that with snarling pride. "But ... but I couldn't. I couldn't win against him. I couldn't stop myself. And I hated it. I hated it so much! I hated feeling any pleasure, feeling myself ready to come. I hated him. I hated my own weak body. I hated ... myself." His head hung as his brows tensed. "There were times during those two weeks locked away with him when I wanted to die. I wanted it to end so badly, I thought about killing myself."

"Natsu," Gray sighed, gripping his hand tightly.

"I'm okay," he whispered, gulping to swallow down the sobs and wiping his eyes until his cheeks went red. "I'm ... okay now."

Gray rubbed Natsu's shivering shoulder. Natsu's aversion to certain sex toys was now explained, as well as why he could not have his semen in something. This past sounded so horrific—being forced to come over and over again, and only being a child—Gray was surprised Natsu could allow himself any sort of physical pleasure at all. Being able to overcome that much was a testament to his inner strength.

"After two weeks, I couldn't come anymore, no matter what he did, what he used." He laughed wryly through tears. "He got mad, pissed as hell at me. He..." The fear returned to his eyes as he gazed off into a dark past. "He began ... choking me again. Those hands ... around my neck ... just like back then." Natsu broke off as he shook his head, struggling not to break down again, but losing the fight. "I ... I went berserk," he cried out in fear, elation, and his own disbelief. "I broke loose ... and ... and I..." The fear turned to fury, the shaking fingers clenched into fists of rage, and he snarled animalistically, "I ripped his head off ... with my bare hands."

Gray's mouth dropped in shock. "Y-You killed someone?"

"Yeah." As Natsu nodded, his face showed a mix of revulsion at the act and sadistic smugness. "Yeaaah." He grinned with a passing moment of insane pleasure, which quickly faded. In regret, he turned his head aside and sighed sadly, "Yeah, I killed him."

Gray could see that such a horrific act was still something Natsu had a hard time thinking about sanely. He could not say anything, though. Sure, they fought a lot, but it was simply an unwritten rule that Fairy Tail wizards could be destructive so long as they did not kill anyone. To hear that Natsu went down that forbidden path of blood made Gray shiver deep inside.

"I don't really remember much after that," Natsu said, calmer now, as if that cathartic moment of violence released all the tension within him, even as an adult. "When I came to, Makarov was there with Gildarts and a couple of other adults. They went looking for me when I was so late returning. I was covered head to toe in blood. I could … taste the blood, taste that man's arousal in it. And … I liked it. I was dancing in puddles of blood, laughing insanely, when they found me. God, I was a mess. They had to … to restrain me." He laughed softly. "I was out to attack everyone," he admitted.

Gray knew Natsu was like that anyway.

"Makarov had me see some psychiatrists. It was all kept quiet from the guild, of course. He probably told everyone I was sick, when in reality I was a mental case. He feared that if the others knew I had actually murdered someone so brutally, some of the members might demand that I be kicked out of the guild. I mean, we don't want a … a murderer in Fairy Tail. And that's what I was. What I am. I killed someone. Barehanded."

"In self-defense," Gray insisted.

"Yes, that's the reason I'm not in jail. Makarov proved it was self-defense. The Magic Council couldn't punish me since I didn't use magic, and it was easy to prove to local authorities that I had been … tortured, at the least. They didn't need to know about the rest of it. Still, Makarov told me not to tell anyone in the guild. I didn't want to, anyway. It's not something I'm proud of, killing a person. Especially like that, with my own hands, wanting him dead, so happy I could finally do it," he whispered in disgust mixed with a gleam of joyful madness. "After over two weeks of being tortured by that man, forced to do what he wanted, touched and prodded by him, I only wish I could have killed him slower."

Natsu looked down at his hands in revulsion.

"That's what I hate the most. I should be sick that I killed someone, repent it, and rationally I do; however, if I were back in that situation, I'd still kill him. I'd kill him over and over again. I'd burn him slowly," he whispered with mad glee. "I'd roast his cock off, then make him eat it, then burn him bit by bit—"

"Natsu!" Gray shouted, sick to hear the gruesome details of Natsu's fantasy-revenge.

The Dragon Slayer jolted out of that twisted reverie. "Sorry," he sighed, flinching as he realized what he had been saying. "Anyway, that's what I keep dreaming about. I kill him in my dreams. Part of me loves to kill him, but I only dream about how I really did it. All the blood. I can taste and smell his blood all over again. It makes me scared that I could turn into that psychotic murderer again. Not just killing him. Playing with the dead body, splashing in his blood, totally insane. I hate what he made me become, and … it makes me … so scared," he whispered in terror. "Scared that if someone touches me like that, I'll do it again. I'll kill them. I won't even realize I killed them until I wake up … covered in blood … with that head … still in my hands."

More pieces were falling into place for Gray. Natsu's fear about hurting a lover, his suddenly violent attacks, mentioning something about blood, and about Makarov telling him not to tell anyone. It was all coming together, and the picture this puzzle showed was horrifying.

"It took me a long time to get over the insanity, but … the scars ran deep. When I hit puberty, I … I couldn't … do the things boys normally do, ya know. Touching myself, things like that." He looked uncomfortable mentioning it. "I was terrified that if I ever got aroused, I'd go insane again. I guess, over the years, I trained my body to hate being aroused. I couldn't come, not unless it was moments like those, moments where I had no freedom, no choice. Being forced. Being assaulted. It was the only way I could convince myself to let go. And I need to be tied up, because I'm scared shitless that I'll rip someone's head off.

"Starting shortly after the issue on Tenrou Island, those nightmares began coming back: being tied up, being strangled. I … I see his head. Detached," he noted with a sick grimace. "It mocks me while shadowy hands touch me. It's not like the fantasies I have of people tying me up. I mean, they're very similar, but … but the nightmares … they're totally different. They terrify me. Seeing that man's head again—" Natsu broke off with a shudder. "It was the head I ripped off. It's the voice that taunted me for weeks, saying 'I'm gonna make you come, boy.' He always called me just boy. It was like he wanted to emphasize that I was nothing more than a goddamn kid. My dreams about killing him are some of my favorites, but the dreams about him touching me … molesting me … those dreams terrify me. I know they're just nightmares, but … but it really happened. He really did that, and … and I'm not normal, all because of that goddamn sonuvabitch."

Gray hugged the Dragon Slayer around the shoulders. "Sorry about that. Damn. I can't even imagine. But I'm here for you, okay? If you ever have those nightmares, just come to me. You know I won't hurt you like that, and you know I can restrain you. I won't let you go crazy like that."

Natsu rested against the bare chest. "Thank you." He stared off as his emotions swirled. "Is it weird, getting tied up is something I want now?"

"No, I think it makes sense, given your history. We deal with our past in any way we can. If getting tied up makes you feel safe, I'll buy lots of rope."

Natsu chuckled softly and snuggled into Gray's chest. "Who would have thought a stripping pervert like you would be the one I could turn to for this sort of thing?"

"Who would've thought I'd be dating a flame-brain idiot like you, of all people?"

"True," Natsu laughed. "Hey, don't tell anyone. I never even told Happy. I don't want people to think I'm weak or … or disgusting."

"You're not disgusting because that happened to you when you were a kid."

Natsu shrank into his arms. "I feel dirty. Ever since then, I've felt … filthy. Like he tainted me."

Gray took Natsu's chin and lifted it to stare into his narrow eyes. "Then I'll have to purge the filth out of you."

Natsu looked stunned, but then he sadly turned his eyes aside. "Not tonight."

Gray felt instant disappointment, but he let go of Natsu's face. "Okay. Tonight, stay with me. I'll protect you from the nightmares."

"I'm not a child," he grumbled.

Still, Natsu curled onto the bed, and Gray wrapped his arms around him, holding his lover close. Through his clothes, Natsu felt that cold, naked body, including a boner down below. He felt guilty for turning Gray down, but he really was not in the mood for anything intimate, not after that dream.

"Thanks, Gray."

"You owe me."

"I'll suck you off in the morning."

"I'll hold you to that promise."

Natsu chuckled softly. In the arms of Gray, with his smell of snow, mint, and pine all around, those nightmares froze, shattered, crumbled to dust, leaving behind peaceful calmness and purity, like a snowy winter forest.

"Goodnight, Gray."

"Try to have some sweet dreams this time."

Natsu snuggled into Gray's broad chest. "I'll dream of you."

"You better!" Then Gray gave Natsu a kiss on the top of his head, closed his eyes, and held the Dragon Slayer through the rest of the night.

Chapter Text

Gray slowly woke up to heaven. Pure heaven. He tingled, and he felt the most wonderful heat around his groin, wet and warm and sucking him just right. He moaned before even fully awake. Struggling through somnolent fog, he opened his eyes and looked down.

"Natsu?" He found his voice dry, maybe sleeping with his mouth open again.

It was dark, and it took a moment to clear his vision. Finally, through early morning silver-green light, he saw a pink head down at his hips, bobbing up and down. Gray collapsed back onto his pillow and hummed in sleepy delight.

"Ooh, what a way to wake up! Mmmh, God. Oooooh…" He leaned his head up again to see that Natsu was only using his mouth, not his hands. In fact, he could not see the Dragon Slayer's hands at all. His arms were behind his back. "H-hey. Did you handcuff yourself?"

"Mmh," Natsu hummed, not removing his lips.

Gray groaned and flopped back again. "Oh man, don't hum like that. It's too good. I'm not even full awake."

"Mm-mrh," Natsu hummed again, and Gray tensed up from the vibration.

"Ooh! Seriously, don't hum. Too good." His brain wanted to drift back to sleep, but his body refused to miss a single second of this pleasure. "You weren't joking when you said you'd suck me off in the morning. God!"

He laid there, enjoying the feeling, listening to the soft slurping. Then he chuckled, put his hand down, and pressed on Natsu's head, pushing deeper into that mouth.

"Come on. You can take more." Gray's fingers yanked at Natsu's pink hair and dug into his scalp as he urged him on. "You're not using your hands, so use that tight throat of yours."

Natsu choked a little as the erection hit the back of his throat. He twisted his head to a different angle, went back down, and pressed deeper. Slowly, his throat opened, and Gray slid down.

"Oh … oh God!"

Gray had only been teasing and had not expect Natsu to actually deep-throat him. He shuddered at just how tight that narrow passage was. Saliva leaked between Natsu's lips and trickled down Gray's shaft. The feeling lasted only a few seconds before Natsu pulled up, gasping for air.

"Are you all right?" Gray asked in amazement.

"Yeah," Natsu panted. "Guess I need to take a bigger breath." He went back down and swirled his tongue around the head first, licking up the taste. Then his lips slid down the shaft, he took a deep breath, and he exhaled slowly as his throat relaxed. Gray's erection slid down the narrow passage again.

Gray saw the shape of Natsu's throat change as he glided deep within. Not only was the feel heavenly, but knowing how uncomfortable that must be, the fact that Natsu was going this far just to please him, sent tingles of pleasure all through Gray's nerves.

Gray moaned a curse, leaning back and straining to fight the instinct of thrusting up into that burning throat. "You're quite a talented little cocksucker."

Natsu thrust down with his throat, small bobbles only, lasting for less than a minute before pulling up for air. With drool covering his chin, he gazed over to Gray. "Do you like that?"

"Yeah," he said with a shiver in his voice.

Natsu grinned and happily licked Gray's entire length. "Hey, stand up."

He crawled off the bed and waited. Gray was still sleepy, but he forced himself to get out of the bed. He saw clearer now that Natsu had indeed managed to get the handcuffs on behind him. Not only that, but he was wearing the white leather collar again. He looked stupidly eager as he waited for Gray to get out of bed.

"Like that," he said, and then Natsu dropped to his knees. "Thrust into my mouth, like you're forcing me to take it."

Gray chuckled, and he ran his hand through Natsu's hair. "You look really erotic, handcuffed like that, wearing this." His fingers drifted down to the collar. "My bitch."

"Your dragon," he corrected.

"Should I get different embroidery on the collar?" he asked wryly.

"It'd be nice if you did, but I can be your bitch once in a while. I'm willing to be that now."

"Indeed." Gray put one finger into Natsu's mouth and pulled his jaw down until his mouth was wide. "Head up," he ordered, and those sage green eyes turned up. That forced his mouth to open even more. "Yes. Like that."

Gray suddenly thrust his cock into Natsu's gaping mouth. The Dragon Slayer gagged a little in surprise, and the choking made Gray chuckle sadistically.

"Yeah, take it." He held the back of Natsu's head so he could not back away as he slammed into that throat again and again, drawing up tears in Natsu's eyes. Gray moaned as he watched himself fucking that face, forcing himself in hard and fast. "Look up at me," he ordered again, and narrow green eyes glared up. "Yeah. Yeah, like that. I like to see your eyes as I thrust into that mouth of yours."

Gray grabbed Natsu's scalp with both hands, pulling his hair until Natsu groaned in pain. That vibration buzzed all through him and made Gray moan, wanting to thrust harder. He felt his stomach coiling already, turned on by those eyes gazing up at him, the drool, the way Natsu's cheek poked out when he thrust just right, and that heat—that amazing, scalding heat—being in and out of that wet furnace. It was becoming too much, too soon.

"I'm gonna come in your mouth, okay?"

Natsu made a mumble noise and nodded his head.

"You're gonna swallow it down. You better swallow."

"Mmmmm."

"Is that all right?"

"Mm-hmm!"

Gray tensed up. He went faster, and even when one of Natsu's teeth scraped his shaft, he didn't care. He needed the heat. He needed that tightness. He needed…

"Natsu!"

He felt himself spill into that mouth, and Natsu grunted in shock. Gray pressed more, slamming in deep, almost thrusting down his throat. He heard Natsu sputtering and gagging, and Gray only rammed harder as his body shivered in pleasure.

"Yes. Like that. Swallow it, bitch."

He felt Natsu's throat working, and he saw him flinch at the taste and thickness of the cum. Natsu struggled to get it down, but Gray did not pull back. He liked feeling that hot mouth working around him. Natsu kept swallowing, and Gray felt his tongue and throat tensing and releasing in gulps. The mouth was such an all-encompassing part of the body, and Natsu's mouth was exceptional.

"Ooh, best wakeup ever."

Finally, Gray pulled back, and Natsu collapsed to his heels, his mouth and throat a wet mess as he gasped for air. Gray leaned over, yanked on the ring of the collar, and pulled Natsu back up.

"Not yet, dragon. I'm not through with you. Lick me clean. You made a mess, so clean it."

Natsu raised back to his knees and lapped up the drip still hanging on the tip of the penis. He sucked the softening cock as it went down, licking it over and over. Gray looked down with pleasure and a sense of wonderful domination.

"Good dragon." Suddenly, Natsu doubled over with a coughing fit, and Gray tensed with worry. "Are you okay?"

Natsu gagged on something, and swallowed harder before looking up with a wide, satisfied grin. "Yeah. That stuff's hard to swallow. Sticks in my throat."

"You did good," Gray praised, stroking his pink hair. "Come on, let me unhandcuff you."

Natsu stood and turned around. Gray unlocked the handcuffs and began to reach up to the collar; however, Natsu drew back, wanting to keep wearing it. Gray felt happy that Natsu loved his present so much.

"Get up into the bed," Gray ordered him. "I wanna hold you while I finish waking up."

They both laid down on the mattress. Gray flopped onto his back, spent and feeling wonderful. Natsu leaned up onto an elbow to gaze down on Gray's prone body.

"Did you like it?" he asked with an eager bite to his lip and hopefulness in his eyes.

"Oh hell yes! Your mouth is so hot."

Natsu chuckled, feeling a little smug.

Gray peeked an eye open. "I'm surprised you were able to do that."

"So long as I'm not getting any stimulation, I can do that much, I guess. I wasn't sure, so I handcuffed myself just in case, but I didn't feel like attacking, so I think it's okay."

"That's good," Gray moaned sleepily. "Maybe we can do that more." He laid still for a while, enjoying the full-body tingle while it lasted. "Hey, um … Do you wanna go out for breakfast?"

Natsu's eyes went wide in shock. "Go out? Like together?"

"There's this breakfast-only café, I hardly ever wake up early enough to go there, but it's really good. Their breakfasts are the best in Magnolia."

"But it's broad daylight."

"Natsu, I don't think any wizards will be up this early. Hell, why are you awake this early?"

"I woke up to pee, and when I came back I realized you had a morning woody. I wanted it," he answered bluntly and honestly.

"Greedy bastard. Not that I mind." Gray hummed a groaning sigh as he stretched his arms above his head. "That was good."

Natsu blushed and confessed, "That was my first blowjob."

Gray jolted out of his stretch. "What? Your first?" he shouted.

"Yep. Was it really okay?"

"First?" Gray repeated, hardly able to believe it. "But that was amaz- … I mean … Damn," he laughed. "You're a natural-born cocksucker."

"Shut up."

"Was that really your first?" he asked again. In Gray's experience, a person did not learn to deep-throat like that their first time. It took practice. "I mean, I know you said I was your first partner but … maybe a fling, a not-really-boyfriend?"

"Oh," Natsu muttered. "I … I guess … maybe not my first."

Gray knew he shouldn't have asked, because jealousy roared up inside him. "What? Who?"

Natsu looked aside with troubled eyes. "That man … in the past."

Jealousy instantly turned to revulsion. "Oh God." He never should have asked. Gray hugged Natsu firmly and yanked him up on top of his chest. "That doesn't count. Okay? That … does … not … count." He stroked Natsu's hair, grimacing at the idea of it, especially as he realized how young Natsu must have been. "You should have bitten him."

"He always had a knife to my throat. Always. And … it wasn't like … like that. Like just now. More like … he'd…" Natsu shivered and shrank down. "I don't wanna talk about it," he mumbled. Then Natsu shouted in frustration, "I know I'm always saying that, but—"

Gray bonked him on the nose. "Stop it. I don't want details. I don't want to dredge it all up and make you suffer. Only tell me what you're comfortable telling me. Besides, whatever he did, it didn't count. So this was your first."

"I guess—"

"It was!" Gray snapped. "You said it was your first, so it was. Maybe not the first time you've had a dick in your mouth, but it was your first blowjob. That's final."

"Fine, fine," Natsu laughed in irritation while actually feeling glad that Gray was not trying to get the whole story.

Softly, Gray confessed, "Your mouth is amazing too."

Natsu blushed. "Really?"

"Totally. Really damn amazing."

Natsu felt overjoyed at the compliment. Still, the troubles of the past put a damper on the moment. "Gray, you taste good," he realized in mild surprise.

"Yeah?"

"How do you taste so good?"

He laughed at such a bizarre question. "What do you mean?"

Natsu looked sick and turned away. "Never mind."

Gray wondered for only two seconds before it dawned on him. The man in the past must have tasted bad. The fact that Natsu could still recall the taste of something that vile made Gray's stomach twist.

"You know, the trick is eating a lot of fruit."

Natsu flipped back around with a stunned expression. "Fruit?"

"Yeah. Fruits and berries make the semen taste good. You might want to try that, eat some berries and stuff, that way you taste good too."

Natsu thought about the suggestion. "Do I taste bad?"

"No, just … you taste like you don't eat a lot of fruit. That's all."

"How big is the difference?"

"I'm not sure, honestly. I haven't given many blowjobs. That's what I was always told, though."

"Who told you that?"

Gray laughed at the jealousy in Natsu's face. It was adorable when he looked so angry. "Ooh, you don't listen to when the big boys in the guild talk, do you?"

"Huh?"

"The older guys in the guild have a lot of stories. Actually, it was Loke who told me about eating berries."

"Oh," Natsu muttered. "I guess Loke is experienced."

"That's putting it mildly."

"Did you and Loke…?"

"No, don't ask. I hate when you ask stuff like that."

"Then … you two did?"

Gray hesitated before answering, "We didn't have sex."

"Oh, okay."

Gray glanced over. Obviously, Natsu thought that meant there was nothing between him and Loke. Gray was fine with leaving it at that. He gave a long sigh and stared up at the ceiling.

"Why do we always mess things up?" he asked, more to himself than asking Natsu. "We've got a good mood, a good blowjob, and we end up screwing it up with our crap."

"Sorry."

"No, not just you. Me too. I'm just in such a good mood, I don't want to think about the past: your past or my past. I just want to think about you." He smiled sleepily. "And about getting another blowjob."

Natsu laughed and rolled on top of Gray. "Really?"

"Well, not right now."

"Later tonight?"

Gray looked up in surprise. "Seriously? I mean, you don't have to."

"I liked it. It made me a little aroused, but not to the point where I felt … bad. It was a good arousal." To show him, Natsu rolled his hips against Gray, rubbing the ice wizard's naked cock with his hard, hot boxers.

Gray felt the erection inside, and although his groin complained that it was sated already, his mind wanted to see Natsu lose control. In a low, lusty voice, Gray asked, "Do you want me to touch you?"

Natsu's body pulled back, and he looked suddenly hesitant. "I … I … don't know."

"What about in the shower? I could wank you off in the shower."

"I dunno. I like when you rub me, but I also like … not coming."

That was one aspect about Natsu that truly confused Gray. "Why? I'm curious: what do you get out of it?"

Natsu thought it was obvious. "I keep in control." However, he saw the confusion still on Gray's face. "Does that not make any sense?"

"I guess it does. Wanting control makes sense, at least. That's why I like to tie you up. I feel in control."

"I like knowing I'm in control of my own body," Natsu whispered bashfully. "I also like giving up that control. Outwardly, not inwardly. If I know you're there to catch me, I can let go. But one thing I always want to control is being able to not come, to hold it back as long as possible. It's the ultimate control, stopping a natural physical response."

"I can relate to that," said Gray. "It's like me and my kink of watching people needing to piss. If they really do want to piss themselves, or they just don't care, it's not erotic at all. It's seeing them struggle that's arousing. It's watching the battle to maintain control over themselves, and especially if they lose control because of me, if I take that control away from them, that turns me on."

Unlike himself, though, Gray had a strong feeling that Natsu's desire to control not coming stemmed from that past horror. It was Natsu's way of defeating the darkness. Since Natsu must still be mentally messed up from the confession last night, he wanted to remember that he was now in control of his body again by being aroused but not giving in.

Gray laughed as he realized their similarities. "We're both control freaks. We just show it differently."

Natsu hummed at the observation, but that was all. He did not bother to wonder why he felt the way he did. "Gray?" he asked with a hint of nervousness. "Can I stay over here until Happy comes home?"

"Sure." Then he teased in mockery. "Are you too scared to sleep alone?"

"Shut up. I just … I like … sleeping with you. Although, your toes are cold."

"Bastard. You kept stealing the covers."

"Maybe if you leaned how to turn a heater on at night."

"You can stay here so long as you don't touch my thermostat."

"No promises."

"Then I can't promise I won't kick you out." He grabbed Natsu and hugged him tightly, rolling on top of him and gazing down. It still amazed Gray sometimes that it was the pink-headed fire-idiot who made him feel this happy. "I'd like to have you stay. Especially if I get to wake up like that."

"Not every morning."

"Yes, every goddamn morning. I want a cocksucker as my alarm clock. Now let's get a shower. I promise to behave this time."

"You first. I don't trust you and that shower."

"Fine, but if we're out of hot water, don't cry."

"Your idea of a hot shower is a melting glacier. I don't think I'll have a problem with you stealing the hot water."

Gray chuckled, and he rolled completely over Natsu to get out of bed. "Are you going to touch yourself while I'm in there?"

"Maybe," Natsu said with a sly smirk.

"I wanna see that."

"Too bad. Imagine it."

Gray's gaze slid head to toe over the Dragon Slayer, pausing on the erection in his flame-print boxers. "Don't be too naughty," he warned before heading to the bathroom.

Natsu's smile slowly fell after Gray left, and he muttered in shame, "I can't be. Not in that way."

Gray's smile refused to dim as he set up the shower. The two of them were still a mess, but he could put up with the occasional awkwardness when Natsu was such a fiery lover.

It was not all that weird anymore to share a bathroom. The first few times Natsu had stayed over were awkward, but Gray got used to it. He even bought a spare toothbrush for the Dragon Slayer to use. It was always Natsu who stayed at his house. Gray had not yet spent the night at Natsu's place, since Happy was usually around.

Now Happy was gone, and Natsu…

… wanted to live here.

Live with Gray.

Living together!

It made Gray blush just thinking about it. He never had one of his lovers live with him. Plus it would make their relationship much closer. They would surely annoy one another after a while. They would argue and have to work it out. Compromising was part of becoming a true couple.

Were they even compatible? The two of them were fire and ice, summer and winter, polar opposites. Living together would either bond them closer, or drive a wedge of incompatibility between them. It was risky, but if it worked, it would be wonderful.

Natsu stepped into the shower after Gray, giving only a smack to his wet ass as he walked by. Gray flushed that Natsu could be so casual about this already. Deep inside, Gray still felt tense, unsure of himself, although outwardly he acted cool and in control. He never knew what Natsu would like, and what might trigger a panic attack.

At least they had talked. He now understood Natsu's issues, and they were some damn issues. He tried to imagine it, but his brain refused. He remembered that time in history. Two years after Natsu joined … Gray had been thirteen. Happy was a newborn kitten. Lisanna was still around. He vaguely recalled that Natsu had gone missing, running off on one of this searches for Igneel. He did that a lot back then. Gray could only faintly remember now, but he seemed to recall that Natsu had been missing a lot longer than usual.

As the S-Class trials approached, Gray wondered where Natsu was. Weeks passed, and no Fire Dragon Slayer. Finally, Gray began to ask around. Where was Natsu? Why was he still missing? Had the idiot run away?

"Natsu is very sick," Makarov had told him. Then in a sad tone, the guild master had added, "He won't be in consideration for S-Class this year anyway. Don't worry about it, Gray. He'll get better someday."

It had seemed like an odd thing to say. Normally, Makarov never flat out said if someone was not in consideration. Age meant very little when it came to the S-Class trials. At the time, Gray was only smug that Natsu was definitely out of the contest.

That must have been it. That was the time when Natsu was captured, tortured, molested, and driven insane by some sick pedophile. It made Gray want to vomit just thinking about it. He could not even imagine how that past affected Natsu himself. Obviously, it left him a mess, even now.

No one made it to S-Class that year. When Natsu had returned to the guild, he was quieter for a time. Gray had tried to pick fights with him, but Natsu kept pulling away. He refused to hit anyone. He stayed with Happy and Lisanna more. For a while, it seemed like the wild Dragon Slayer might have fallen into some sort of domestication. Of course, everyone thought that was Lisanna's doing. She was training him to be a good father and husband. Gray was annoyed that he had no one to annoy.

That peace and quiet lasted almost two years. Natsu did not go on any of his searches for Igneel during that time. He raised Happy with Lisanna as a pseudo-wife. Then Gildarts left. That triggered something in Natsu. Maybe it was something the older wizard had said to him, but after Gildarts went on his hundred-year mission, Natsu suddenly snapped back to being his normal self. He had been slowly getting better, feistier, and at least he did challenge a few people he trusted. After Gildarts took off, the old Natsu was back. His goal was to become S-Class now, and he trained obsessively.

Had it taken him two years to fully recover from that horrific ordeal? Thinking about the past with knowledge of that darkness now marred those sunny memories and changed everything Gray thought he knew about Natsu.

He combed through his wet hair, but he noticed a spot. Softly, Gray cursed as he saw he had a pimple where his bangs draped down. He had not had one of those in months. He wondered if it was from stress, or maybe sweating. Sleeping with Natsu really did make him sweat at night. He used a clamp to hold his bangs back and pulled out some medication. He scratched the pimple with his clean nails, just to break the skin slightly, and leaned in close to the mirror.

Just then, the water turned off and Natsu stepped out of the shower. He grabbed a towel and began to wipe away the water from his body. When he looked to the sink, he saw Gray leaning in ridiculously close.

"What are you doing?"

"I woke up with a pimple," Gray grumbled. "I'm just trying to pop it."

He almost had it when suddenly Natsu shrieked. It made Gray jolt in shock.

"Natsu?" he shouted. The Dragon Slayer had collapsed inside the shower. Gray feared he might have slipped, but when he rushed over he saw Natsu was sitting on the shower floor, knees curled up, and eyes massive. "What the hell happened?"

"Don't pop the pimple. Don't pop it," Natsu muttered, half-insane.

"What the…? It's a pimple. How the hell can you freak out over a pimple?"

Natsu was shivering too hard to answer right away. Gray knelt beside him and wrapped his arms around Natsu, trying to console him.

"That man," Natsu finally whispered breathlessly. "He … he used to call me … disgusting little pimple. He … he'd call my penis a pimple, saying he needed to … to … pop it. He once showed me his own pimple," he snuffled. "He popped it. Right onto me. He wiped it on my face. Then he … he did the same but … but to me … and he showed how both shot out white stuff. He said it was just like a pimple, and he was just popping the pimple."

Gray sneered in disgust. "That's messed up. Look, your cock is not a pimple. It'd be one hell of a pimple if it was."

Natsu faintly laughed. "I was still little back then."

Gray grumbled angrily, "That makes it worse. So what did you do during puberty? Almost everyone gets pimples."

Natsu gulped hard as he remembered that awkward time. "The first time I got one, I had a total mental breakdown. Happy had to go get Makarov. I was sent to a special dermatologist. I followed his orders obsessively and never had another pimple again."

"So you've never actually popped a pimple?" he asked in surprise.

"No! For one, it's gross. For two, I would probably freak out again if I ever got one."

Gray nodded in understanding, and then he looked up to Natsu firmly. "Pop my pimple."

"What?" he shrieked.

"Pop it. You've never done it, so you don't even know how different it is."

"No, I … I can't!" Natsu curled down into his legs. "I can't do that to someone else."

"For God's sake, you just gave me a blowjob. You can pop a lousy white-head. Look up! Look at my face." Gray tugged Natsu's chin up sharply. "Look at my goddamn pimple."

Natsu cringed back, but he stared at the swollen skin with its white tip.

"Now, put one finger onto my forehead, to the side of the pimple, not touching it."

Natsu's hand shook, but he slowly reached toward that dreaded pimple.

"Good. You're doing fine. Now, with your other hand, put your index finger on the other side, close to it, but not touching it."

A little easier this time, Natsu put his other finger on Gray's forehead. His breathing was still coming fast and shaky.

"You're doing just fine. Now, press the two fingers together."

"I can't pop it!"

"I'm giving you permission."

Permission? Natsu realized that was a huge difference. Permission to pop it. Gulping hard and barely able to breathe, he pressed the two fingers together.

"Harder," Gray encouraged in a quiet tone. He knew the pimple was ready to pop anyway. "You have to squeeze it firmly."

Natsu was shaking, staring in terror, yet he kept pressing. It was like a jack-in-the-box, knowing the toy inside would spring at any minute, but still swirling the handle, anticipating with inner fear. He cringed down, not even breathing anymore, waiting and waiting until…

Instead of an explosion, the white core oozed out. Natsu stared at the anti-climatic pop.

"That's it?"

"What did you expect? It's just a clogged pore."

"That wasn't how the man's pimple popped. Come to think of it, his was massive."

"It was probably a boil or sebaceous cyst. Those can be nasty. Eww, if he popped something like that at you, no wonder you have a fear of pimples. That'd gross me out too."

Gray took a tissue, wiped up the white core, and pressed together a little harder to make sure the pore was cleared out. When only blood drained, he put medicine on the spot.

Natsu watched with mild interest now that the worst was over. "I can show you how to wash your skin so you never get pimples. Erza made me show her when she realized I had such good complexion."

"Sure. It's a pain in the ass when I get them."

Natsu laughed tensely. "Ya know, when I was a kid, I was so messed up in the head because of what that guy said, I thought pimples were filled with semen. I refused to go anywhere near Elfman during that bad acne breakout he had when he was fourteen."

Gray glanced at the reflection in the mirror to where Natsu stood behind him. "Are you serious? Filled with semen?"

"Hey, after something like that…"

"No, I get it, that guy messed you up bad, but … seriously? Didn't you wonder why pimples were on people's faces?"

Natsu looked away petulantly. "My first pimple was on my butt, and I got it after having a wet dream. I thought the semen had dripped to my ass and the white stuff was that. When I saw others with pimples on their faces, I … I used to…" He laughed nervously. "I thought they gave blowjobs and it squirted on their faces."

Gray blinked in shock. "You thought Elfman…?"

"Oh, shut up! I was a kid."

"But … Elfman?"

"Don't you dare tell him."

"No, because I wanna vomit just picturing it. I mean, who the hell would Elfman suck off?" Gray turned and tried to finish brushing his hair while Natsu dried himself. Then the comb stopped. "Oh God, I'm picturing it! I am never forgiving you for this mental image."

"What's worse is I'm picturing fourteen-year-old Elfman, when he was all geeky."

"Oh hell, Natsu! That's a hundred times worse. Dammit, my mind can't unsee that mental image. You are so dead."

"You know, the first time you got a pimple—"

"No! Oh God, no. I don't even want to know."

Natsu laughed at him. Then he smirked deviously. "You had your breakout at about the same time as Elfman, so of course I thought—"

An icy punch hit him in the face. "If you keep talking, I will beat you until your whole body swells up like a goddamn pimple." Gray tried to hit him again, but Natsu laughed as he fended off the fists.

"That's fine." He grabbed both of Gray's hands to stop them and leaned his face in close. "You're the only person who I'll allow to pop me." He bit Gray on the nose, then turned and ran off to the bedroom.

Gray rubbed his nose, but he smiled to himself. One more awkward mental mess, cleared up!

Chapter Text

The team returned from a short but tiring mission. Erza dragged her massive cart toward Fairy Hills to begin the long task of unpacking. Lucy shuffled her feet homeward, whining that part of their reward money had to be used to repair buildings Natsu broke. Instead of going to the guild, Gray and Natsu went straight home.

Straight to Gray's home, that is.

They had been living together for a few days, and Natsu had grown to feel at home in the cold apartment. Gray even made a copy of his key, so Natsu could come right in whenever he wanted. Nobody had yet caught on that they were going home together after parties at the guild. Living together was a nice experiment, something Gray hoped they could keep doing. He knew that eventually Happy would return from his mission to New Extalia, but until then he could make-believe that Natsu lived here, that they were a couple, and … he like that idea. A lot!

They were even settling into something like a domestic routine. Natsu got his shower first, so he could make the water as hot as he wanted, while Gray made tea for them to drink and unpacked their clothes from the mission. He got the laundry started and put away clean clothes Natsu had not worn. Natsu had his own little section of the closet now, and one drawer of Gray's dresser was for his clothes, just enough for a week, since that was as long as they figured Happy would be gone. Still, sharing space, mixing laundry, cooking together, sleeping together—this was a level of intimacy Gray had never experienced with a partner, and he wondered why he allowed Natsu, of all people, to be this close to him.

Natsu came out of the bathroom wrapped in a towel, and without a word Gray went in after him. It was way too steamy in the shower. Natsu always forgot to open a window or turn on a vent. He liked it steamy, but Gray could not stand it. There were always little things that annoyed one another, but they seemed so petty now.

A few minutes later, Gray came out of the shower drying his hair. Natsu was crashed out on the bed, his hair still damp, and he was slowly touching himself, not full strokes, just slight caresses to a half-erection hidden in his boxers. Gray often caught him doing this, almost like Natsu did not realize he was doing it. It was like a toddler who rubbed the crotch of his diapers, not knowing why touching that area felt so good, only understanding that it made him relaxed and happy. The Dragon Slayer liked the feel of arousal without the full satisfaction of climax.

"Need help with that?" Gray offered.

"Nah. I'm tired … and I'm horny."

Gray laughed at the sleepy words. "Well, which one do you want: touched or sleep?"

In a drowsy mumble, Natsu drawled out, "Touch me in my sleep."

Gray tossed the wet towel into the hamper. "Should I turn off the light and let you take a nap before dinner?"

"Mm-hmm."

Gray turned off the lamp, and the room went dark with only the ruddy sunset glow from outside to light them. Then he laid naked next to Natsu and gazed down at his relaxed face.

"You fought hard today. You deserve a rest."

"Hmmmmm." He was already drifting off into sleep.

Gray chuckled at Natsu's closed eyes and how his breaths were slowing down. "You're really zonking out, aren't you?"

"Mm-hmm."

"So, do you really want me to touch you as you sleep?"

"Mm-hmmmmm!"

"God, you're sexy," he whispered.

"Keep me hard," Natsu mumbled, only barely awake. "I wanna wake up with an erection. Don't wanna come, though. If … I don't come … he can't … not let you … don't call me … boy … fight it … -astard … find … safe place … here's … mine…" He muttered a few more broken phrases as his breathing went heavy with dreams.

Those mutters worried Gray. Natsu still did not want to talk more about what happened in his past, and Gray decided to let him reveal things as he slowly healed. He never pushed for more information.

Gray reached down to Natsu's boxers. He touched the softened cock, moving gently, until he felt it twitching and coming to life. Natsu groaned, and he thrust slightly in his sleep. However, he did not wake up. As he slept, Natsu kept alternating, hard and soft. Gray loved feeling both ways. Sometimes Natsu went soft despite Gray's caressing hands, and sometimes he became stiffly aroused with hardly any touching at all.

Gray lazily played as he watched the Dragon Slayer sleep. He was unsure if he had ever stared for so long at Natsu. He examined every detail of that somnolent face: the edges of his neck scar, the way his eyelashes rested, a tiny flake of dry skin on his eyebrow, the shape of his nose, and the creases in his lips as he breathed in and out of a slightly parted mouth. As his hand cupped Natsu's most sensitive area, he felt warm simply lying there, watching him reverently. He wondered if Natsu had spent nights doing the same, gazing down at Gray in the moonlight.

After many minutes, Natsu's cock went turgid, and he began to pant hard. His sleeping face drew up, and Gray worried that he was about to come in his sleep. He did not want Natsu to lose in whatever this contest was of delaying his orgasm as long as possible, so he leaned over and kissed him so hard, it woke him up.

"Whuh?" Natsu asked in sleepy confusion. Then he felt the strain in his underwear. "Oh God, what did you do to my dick?"

"I think you were having a wet dream."

"Wet dream?" he asked. "But I was dreaming about—" He broke off and began to blush.

"About what?"

"Nothing!"

Gray felt jealous. "About whom?" he demanded.

Natsu looked away. "It's stupid. Just a dream."

"About whom?" he repeated louder.

Natsu frowned and mumbled, "About … Edo-Gray."

"What?" Gray bellowed in covetous rage. "That over-dressed lookalike?"

"It's not how you think. It was like … I was Edo-Natsu in the dream, and in Edolas, their version of you is best friends with their version of me. So in my dream, the two of them were like us, only I—that is, Edo-Me—was the one on top, and you—Edo-You—were the bottom."

Gray's mouth dropped. Instead of being jealous, he began to feel intensely curious about this sort of mirror-universe dream. "So you were dreaming about switching places?"

"More than just who's on top. Edo-Gray was the one who kept breaking down and had issues. Edo-Natsu was the one comforting you … him … whatever. It's not as easy to tell you two apart when you're both naked. I was … I mean, he was— It's confusing and stupid, okay?" he shouted.

"No, that sounds seriously hot," Gray said in amazement. "I want to hear more." He stroked Natsu again, still hard in his boxers. "Tell me everything about the dream. Where were we?"

Natsu flushed to his ears. "W-we were in Fireball Natsu's car, in the backseat, and we were … I mean, they were…"

"Fucking each other?"

"The doubles of us were, but only in my dream. They're just friends in real life."

"You can say it like it's us then, that's fine."

Natsu smelled Gray's arousal. "We were in the car. You were lying down across the backseat, and I was above. I was … thrusting into you."

Gray reached to his own erection and stroked it. "Yeah? What else?"

Natsu watched Gray's hands as they stroked both erections at the same time. "You were moaning my name over and over. And I … I was thrusting into you … while stroking you."

"Mmmh," Gray moaned, imagining something like that really happening.

"I had tied your hands up with the seatbelt. I was holding you down, restraining you."

"Yesss…" Gray moaned. "More. Tell me more."

Natsu licked his lips as he watched Gray's face, eyes closed, indulging in the fantasy. "I leaned over." He rolled over and straddled above Gray. "And I did this." He bent down and bit Gray on the nipple.

"Arrrgh," Gray cried out.

"Don't touch me," Natsu ordered, and Gray pulled his hand away immediately. Natsu was breathing hard, but without stimulation, he could continue without being tied up. "I was the one biting you," he whispered hotly into Gray's ear. "I was the one leaving marks. I told you it was okay, since you wore so much clothing."

Gray laughed breathlessly at that. Maybe his mirror universe twin had an advantage.

"I kept thrusting in," Natsu breathed seductively, tweaking Gray's nipples between his fingers. "You were begging me to stop, but I wouldn't. You weren't saying the safeword, so I kept going. You were shouting, 'No. Stop. Don't touch me there. It's weird.' You needed to feel like you were being forced, and I was … not really, but it was like … like I was raping you. Ignoring your pleas. Forcing you to feel me. But I knew it was okay. You knew what to say if things went too far, but … but this was how you liked it. Forceful. Rough. Ramming in without mercy. Ravaging you!"

Gray whimpered as his hips thrust up from the mattress. The growl in Natsu's voice was terrifying and arousing. "Tell me more!"

Natsu licked his lips as he savored the sight of Gray being so aroused just from listening to his story. "I wouldn't listen. I held your wrists down so you couldn't escape. I kept going, pushing you more and more."

Natsu licked his finger, getting it slippery wet, then reached down and pressed it inside Gray's rear entrance. Those stormy-blue eyes fluttered open wide. It had been a very long time since Natsu had touched him down there, and the feeling shocked him. He tried to stutter out Natsu's name, but the fervid words silenced him.

"I was ramming into your ass," Natsu told him as he thrust his finger in. "Harder. Faster. Over and over. Thrusting myself into you." He squeezed a second finger in, and Gray howled at the pleasure. "I was stroking you faster. Your cock was leaking all over my hand, but I wouldn't let you come. I wanted more. You were screaming so loudly. I wanted to hear you say my name." He leaned down, bit Gray's earlobe, and growled. "Moan my name, bitch."

"N-Natsu," Gray cried out.

"Louder."

"Natsuuuuu!"

"Yes." He began to rub his arousal against the side of Gray's leg, feeling the friction in his boxers. His fingers brushed against Gray’s prostate, and he aimed there, rubbing it mercilessly. "I was completely overwhelming you. Touching you. Thrusting into you. Fucking you hard!"

Gray cried out. He felt himself close. So damn close!

"And then you woke me up, bastard. Before those two doubles of us could finish, you woke me up. So I have to finish the dream here. I have to force you to come."

He latched his mouth onto Gray's neck while pinching his nipple hard and piston-pounding his ass. Gray cried out as the tension snapped within him. He shuddered as spurts shot out over his stomach.

Damn! He hoped someday Natsu could get over his problems, and they could live out that fantasy. He really wanted to feel Natsu inside of him again. His fingers were a mere tease to how that prodigious cock would feel.

Natsu released his mouth as he heard Gray's weary, slow breaths that showed he was done. The mark on Gray's neck would be something everyone would see. There was no way to hide it normally.

"You'll have to wear a turtleneck," he said.

Gray reached up to the slight ache in his neck, and he glared wearily. "Bastard."

Natsu reached over to the tissue box, one to be used for his fingers, one for Gray to wipe up the creamy mess. "Do you like that idea? Me topping you?" he asked as they cleaned up.

"Hell yes!"

Natsu smiled, although there was a hint of sadness in his eyes. "I want to do that someday. I want to get better, so I can be on top, and maybe … maybe…" He gulped hard as desire and fear clashed. "Someday, I want to … to come … inside you. I know I can't do it yet, not with my issues, but … if it's you … knowing it's you and … and you won't … do something like that…"

Gray reached up to stroke the flushed face with the back of his knuckles. "Natsu, if you come in my ass, all I can do is shit it out."

He pouted deeply. "I know. I want to convince myself that it's okay. I want to be able to do that someday. I keep dreaming, but even my dreams won't let me think that I can do it. It's always dreams about Edolas, and it's him who does it. But someday…" He leaned over and kissed Gray. "Someday, I want to be able to make love to you without the mental mess."

Gray smiled up confidently at him and stroked his cheek. "Someday, we will."

Natsu felt that if Gray said so, it would definitely happen. "I love you, Gray."

Gray felt the small hesitation of panic. "Someday, I'll be able to tell you that back."

"We both have work to do."

"Yeah. Both of us are a mess still."

"But we're getting better."

"Yeah…"

Still, as Gray left to the bathroom to wash up, he felt so weak, being unable to say something so simple and fearing the emotions inside of him. He could not say it, not out loud, but he knew the truth in his heart.

He had fallen in love.

And it scared the crap out of him.

He had lost every person to whom he ever said I love you, and that emotion now terrified him. Yet as Natsu entered the bathroom and washed his hands, the smile on that perky face warmed Gray again. If Natsu could slowly heal from something as horrific as that awful past of torturous abuse, then there was hope for himself, a way to melt his frozen heart, fiery touches that could scald those icy barriers, an igneous hero who could free him from his gelid jail.

"Are you okay?" Natsu asked in worry, gazing back at Gray in the mirror. "You look ready to cry. Did … did I hurt you? Was it my fingers? I know you're not used to that—"

"Shut up." Gray suddenly embraced Natsu from behind, pressing him up against the sink and squeezing him around the chest while resting his head within the softness of pink hair.

"Gray?" the Dragon Slayer asked in confusion.

"You're burning me up," Gray whispered, clutching him with desperation. "Don't ever stop."

Slowly, the confusion passed, and Natsu sighed as he smelled the changes in Gray. Relief and love were a nice smell when they mixed with Gray's frosty forest scent. "Same goes to you."

Gray looked up and stared at himself and Natsu side by side in the mirror. He saw the redness around his eyelids as he forced himself not to cry. He looked so pathetic. What sort of Dominant was he?

Maybe the sort who had a lover who refused to be submissive.

"I lo- … uh…" Gray flinched at the prickling fear that filled him whenever he tried to say the word. "You … I lo- … luh-…"

"Gray, don't," Natsu said, and he turned around to face him directly. "Don't force yourself. I know." He tiptoed up and kissed Gray on his straining, tightened lips. "I already know … idiot."

"I really am an idiot," Gray grumbled. "I can't even say it properly."

"The words mean nothing. You show me in everything you do." He grabbed Gray’s naked hips and pulled him closer. "And I like to show you. Showing you how I feel is way better than some words. How about I show you by buying some take-out? We'll stay in tonight, cuddle on the couch, and maybe I'll let you touch me some more."

Gray smirked, feeling better simply by the understanding in Natsu's words. "Can I drive you crazy?"

Natsu chuckled lustfully. "You always do."

Chapter Text

Natsu walked into Gray's house without even knocking. After all, he had a key to the place and felt right at home living there. "Yo! Mira said you wanted to see me. She thinks you're gonna challenge me." He smirked, hoping the invitation was for something much more pleasurable. Then Natsu noticed a suitcase on the bed and Gray packing away clothes. "What's going on?"

"I'm being sent on a mission up north," Gray explained, tossing underwear into the suitcase. "It's an emergency; they need someone who can manipulate ice. I'll be gone two or three days."

"Oh," Natsu muttered. "So, did you want a quick romp before you go?"

Gray glanced over with a regretful smile. "As much as I'd like that, I have to hurry. The last train leaves in twenty minutes. I wanted to tell you personally, and warn you that it wouldn't be good if you come here while I'm gone. The neighbors don't know you well enough. They might think you're breaking in."

"I see. So, I should go back home." Natsu felt a little lonely already. He had come to like Gray's place. At least it was clean, and the cold was not so bad once you got used to it. "That's fine," he assured, hiding his disappointment. "I probably should clean up before Happy returns, anyway." That was true. He probably had moldy food.

"Before I go, I want you to do something." Gray walked over to his chest of kinky goodies, unlocked it, and pulled out a strange device. Natsu thought it looked like a plastic, hollow dong.

"What the hell is that?"

"A male chastity belt," Gray said, bringing the device over. "I want you to wear it while I'm gone. I don't want you to touch yourself. I want to know for sure that you won't do anything perverted while I'm away."

"Gray, that's ridiculous. I wouldn't cheat on you, and you know I can't … you know … touch myself and stuff."

"I know, and I trust you. This is just to make sure. Plus if you're wearing it, you'll constantly be reminded that you're saving yourself for me. You said before, you like hiding my hickeys with your scarf. This is a little bit of kinkiness you hide in your pants. Happy's still gone, so it's not like he'll see you wearing it in the shower. Please," he said beseechingly. "For me. Just wear it."

Natsu took the weird plastic penis cage and turned it around in his hands. "If I'm gonna wear this for a couple days, how do I piss in this thing?"

"See the wide slit? That's to let urine pass through. It's also ventilated in case you sweat. It might be a little awkward, and you need to keep it clean; however, it's perfectly safe. You can wear it up to ten days, but we'll start with only two. I got a plastic one so that if there are any serious issues, you can melt it off."

"Melt it?" Natsu asked. "How much did you pay for this?"

Gray frowned, reluctant to say. "It wasn't cheap, but it's worth it if I can rest assured nobody will touch you. If you always feel it shielding you, you'll always be reminded of me, and that you belong to me. If there's an emergency, you can use your flame to melt it off, but I'll be disappointed. Now come on, I really need to hurry. Let's cram your dick in there and I'll lock it."

Natsu was not too sure about this. Something like this would be almost impossible to hide around the house. If Happy came home early and saw it, he would freak out. Even perfectly normal things, like urinating in the guild bathrooms, risked exposure. Still, there was a thrill to that risk. He pulled off his trousers and dropped his underwear.

"Don't harden up," Gray ordered. He rubbed a little lotion onto Natsu's cock to help the chastity cage to slide, then he shimmied the device up the length of the soft shaft. The plastic hollow dong was barely big enough for his cock, and Gray muttered that maybe he should have gone with a custom-fit one for Natsu's impressive size. He then took a plastic ring and carefully wrapped it around Natsu's testes. Already, Natsu felt the desire to harden up.

"Couldn't you have jerked me off first?" he grumbled.

Still kneeling and fitting a holding pin into the testicle ring and penis tube to link them together, Gray smirked sadistically. "Nope. I want you needing me. You'll know just how much your body craves me after merely two days."

"I need you now!"

"I know. I wish I had time." Gray used a small brass padlock to cage in the plastic tube, locking it to the ring around Natsu's balls. "There! You can still get erect, but it'll pull on the ring here and tug your balls. That will make you ache. Through pain, you'll train yourself not to get erect for anyone but me."

"Dammit, Gray, I already want to get hard just wanting you."

Gray took the half-naked Dragon Slayer into his arms and kissed him. "Be a good dragon. No touching."

"Gray…" he whined.

"I need to go."

"Gray!" he yelled urgently.

Gray locked up his suitcase, and then he gave Natsu a quick peck on the cheek. "Wait for me. If you're good, I'll give you a really hard fucking."

Natsu's cock leaped, and he felt the pull on his testicles. He reached to push the urgency down. "Gray, don't say that when I'm like this."

Gray held up the key to the chastity belt. "Obey me."

Natsu's eyes narrowed. "I'm not submissive."

"I didn't say you were. I just want you to suffer a bit, even if I'm not here." Gray reached down and touched the plastic cage, chilling his hand a little. Natsu cried out at the cold. His cock tried to leap up again, which yanked on the ring around his balls and sent discomfort through his scrotum. "Mmm, what a beautiful face," Gray moaned, savoring the agony in Natsu's grimace. "I'll be imagining this tormented face the whole time. I'll constantly be thinking about you, about your trapped dick, wanting to free it … and have it. This will be sweet torment for you, Natsu, and overwhelmingly arousing to me. Plus you have to wear this thing in public. You have a slight exhibitionist streak, so you'll like that, won't you? Wearing some kinky cock cage, wondering if anyone will notice the bulge. You'll love this, I just know it. God, how I would love to watch how it torments you!"

He slammed Natsu against the wall and kissed him hard. Natsu whimpered as his erection really strained now. Still, he could not help but yank on Gray's hair as their tongues danced together. Mouths clashed, steamy and frosty, savoring one last taste. Shivering with desire, Gray sneered and suddenly pulled away.

"You torture me, Natsu," he accused with a growl. "I'm gonna be late. I need to leave … now." He fled, grabbing his suitcase and running out the door for the race to the train station.

Natsu was left in the cold room, still leaning against the wall, his underwear off, the chill of Gray's home tingling his bare thighs. He still felt the pull of the erection, and slowly he tried to regain self-control. He breathed deeply, forcing the erection down. As he shrank, the pain eased, and there was relief that warmed him. It was like a treat for being good.

Good dragon, you got soft again.

"This is crazy," he whispered. Gray had mentioned a chastity belt in his massive Checklist of Fucking, but Natsu never thought he would actually get one.

Thinking that now he could not touch himself, even if he wanted to, made him actually want to. Natsu had never been able to touch himself to fulfillment before, but having something that denied him of that ability, stripping him of freewill over the most intimate part of his body, aroused a painful need to rebel and get erect. Wearing this device was a constant reminder of that forbidden act.

Slowly, Natsu put on his underwear and trousers. He looked in the mirror and grabbed his crotch. The chastity belt was form-fitting, nothing stuck out or looked awkward through clothes, and it did not feel too awkward wearing it, so long as he just stood there. Still, his dick felt huge, and the sensation was constantly between his legs. Plus he had to go outside like this. Even if he just went home, he had to leave the sanctuary of Gray's room and walk out in public … wearing a cage around his cock.

He locked up Gray's house, stepped outside, and stood there for a moment. He thought for sure everyone would notice it. As pedestrians passed by, no one stared. They kept walking. Even a group of girls who walked by and eyed him up, giggling that he was cute, none of them gawked at what Natsu thought felt like a massive enhancement to his cock.

Not that a bigger dick was a bad thing!

Slowly, getting used to the feel, he walked toward the guild instead of back home. He wanted to wear this. He wanted to sit there amongst all his friends, wearing this sensual device, hiding it, just like he hid the hickeys with his scarf.

He expected Cana to ask if he was larger, or Gajeel to make some comment about faking the size of his cock. Instead, as he sat down carefully at the bar, no one said anything. He kept glancing around, thinking for sure that everyone would be staring at his crotch. He even spun around in his chair, facing the main dining area, and sat normally with his legs spread slightly. To Natsu, he felt as if he was putting his crotch on display, daring the whole guild to look at him.

However, it was a normal day, no crotch-watching, no comments. Natsu almost giggled. He had something in his pants, and no one knew. He was a pervert, wearing some kinky chastity cage on his penis, and no one would find out.

"Hey, Natsu!"

Lucy came up, and Natsu thought for sure that if anyone would notice his caged dick, it would be her. She knew him best and had gotten a few glimpses of his penis while the team was out on long missions. There was that mixed-gender onsen, that incident in the ryokan when he walked in on her in the bathtub just as he was ready to take a bath, and a few times when she had walked in on him pissing in bushes, although he was not sure if she actually looked.

"Wanna go on a mission?"

Natsu's mouth dropped a little. Could he even fight wearing this? What if an enemy kicked him in the nuts? What if he had to pee while on the mission, and Lucy stumbled in on him? What if they had to spend the night somewhere?

However, if he told her no, she would ask if something was wrong. People would wonder. They would look at him closer. God, Lucy might demand he go see a doctor! It was bad enough when Porlyusica figured out about him and Gray, but if that old lady saw him wearing this…

"Yeah, sounds great, Lucy," he said with a grin. "But try to make it a quick one. I have to be back in town in two days." He needed to be back so Gray could unlock this cage and free his dick.

Lucy trotted up to the mission board, and Natsu shifted his legs. A mission. Fighting. Working while wearing this device. Could he really do this?

Lucy picked an easy one, thankfully. They were helping an old man find his missing dog. The trick was it was a magical dog who could vanish. Natsu's sense of smell would be the deciding factor. If they were lucky, there would be no fighting at all.

Natsu knew, there was no way in hell he would get sick on transportation while wearing this chastity belt. He insisted upon walking, which meant a full day to reach the client. After two hours on the road, he changed his mind. Walking this much with that device chaffing him was torture. They hitched a ride with a man pulling a cart of hay, and Natsu simply dealt with the sickness.

They arrived in the client's town at night. They got a hotel, but Lucy was being cheap, so she insisted that they share a room to keep down costs. While Natsu waited for Lucy to finish her shower, something truly horrible happened.

He began to think like a typical teenage boy.

He heard a soft hum of pleasure from the bathroom. He knew it was just Lucy enjoying the hot shower, but his mind thought of other things.

What if Lucy took this moment alone to seduce him? Hell, the whole guild already thought the two would hook up. If she came out naked and wanting sex…

He began to get hard, but his cock smashed against the cage. Its downward-curved shape denied the cock from rising, and the tight fit around his testicles meant that Natsu could not possibly reach full erection.

And that idea, the thought of being imprisoned, made him even more aroused.

It became painful. Natsu leaned over at the waist, aching with the need to get hard, and the punishment of not being allowed to. He reached down, but he felt only the hard plastic.

If Lucy wanted sex … if she tried to feel him up while he slept…

He knew Lucy was not that type of girl, plus she was dating Loke now. Or at least, they banged occasionally. Were they even still together? Loke was anything but monogamous, so maybe Lucy wasn't either. Maybe she would not mind a second lover.

If she realized Natsu was wearing a chastity belt…

She would ask. She would push him to confess who put it on him. He could not blame a fictional girlfriend anymore. She would find out all about him and Gray. Maybe she would blackmail him. Maybe she would want to join in for a threesome as payment for her silence.

Gray had mentioned if Natsu might someday want a threesome.

Lucy was hot; everyone in Fairy Tail thought so, even the women. Natsu had even considered her for a while, thinking the whip made her a natural dominatrix. If she whipped him, like how Gray had whipped him with that riding crop…

God, that had felt so good!

"Dammit," Natsu whimpered as the memory of that night sent a blindingly painful surge to his cock and balls.

Maybe Lucy would flog him while Gray fucked him. He imagined her swinging a whip. "Ride him faster. Faster!"

"Ow, ow, ow!" he hissed as his cock wanted to grow, the cage prevented it, and the strain of the ring pulling around his balls aroused more desires. It was ironic that making his dick off limits made him want to use it even more.

Before Natsu could recover from the penile pain, the bathroom door opened, and Lucy stepped out with a puff of steam.

"There's still hot water if … uh … are you okay?"

Natsu was still leaned over, holding his crotch. He bolted up and ran to the bathroom, slamming the door behind him.

Lucy blinked in surprise. "If he had to pee that badly, he could have knocked."

In the steamy bathroom, Natsu ripped his clothes off. He looked down to the clear plastic cage and the cock that had engorged and filled the barrier. He touched the plastic, but he could not feel anything. He wiggled his finger into the slit in the base of the tube for urine, and although he could feel the skin, he could not relieve the ache, desire, and desperation. Gray's words came back to him.

If there's an emergency, you can use your flame to melt it off, but I'll be disappointed.

Natsu gritted his teeth and held back the instinct to melt the device and jerk off. Right now, being so utterly forbidden, he felt like maybe he could have masturbated successfully for once.

He jumped in the shower, let the water hit his head, and tried to think of something else, anything else.

Instead, he realized he had to pee. He had already gone earlier that day while they were on the road. Peeing while wearing this was nasty. The slit allowed the urine to flow through just fine, but he had to wipe up anything that dripped onto the plastic tube.

Natsu realized, it would clean up better in the shower.

He could pee in the shower.

He stared at the door. If Lucy walked in while he was peeing…

Hell, the shower door was clear glass, so if she walked in, she would see the chastity belt caging him. Pissing was hardly the issue.

Still, to pee in the shower that Lucy would use tomorrow…

Gray would be proud of him. Gray would love to watch.

He imagined doing this for Gray, wearing this belt in the shower, with the steam making the cock inside obscured, and then … Gray had such a pee fetish. He would urge Natsu to do it.

Do it. Pee while wearing that. Pee into my chastity belt.

Natsu felt his cock want to leap, but instead he pressed on his bladder, keeping his focus there. He just had to let go, to loosen up, release it and…

The first dribbles came out hesitantly and quickly clenched off. Natsu's sensitive nose smelled urine above the scent of Lucy's shampoo. He gasped as he felt so naughty, so dirty. Still, he wanted this little bit of naughtiness. Shivering with pleasure, he leaned his head back, relaxed his bladder, and let go.

Peeing … into Gray's cage. Peeing in the shower, with Lucy outside. It felt so wrong, so kinky, so…

Knock-knock! "Natsu?"

There was no way he could stop the flow now. "What?" he screamed, covering the plastic with his hands in front of him while the pee continued to flow out. Was it his imagination, or did the pouring urine make the cascading shower sound too loud? Had Lucy heard a difference in the raining shower? Had she smelled the urine?

"What do you want to do about sleeping arrangements?"

"Anything. It's fine," he said tensely. Oh God, peeing in a shower while talking to Lucy!

"I guess you can sleep beside me on the bed. I can trust you, right?"

"Totally," he said. He realized, there was no way he could do anything to her while wearing this device. That was the whole purpose of it, to stop him from having sex.

"I'll throttle you if you do anything perverted."

Perverted … like wearing a chastity belt and being aroused by thoughts of a threesome and peeing in the shower.

"Well, I'm going to bed now."

"Sure," he grunted as the pee began to slow down. He could have clenched it off, but he felt his heart racing doing this, peeing in the shower while having a normal conversation with his friend.

"Goodnight," Lucy called in.

"Yeah, g'night."

He did not hear her again, and slowly the stream of urine ended. Natsu felt like he was sweating. That had been oddly orgasmic, without the orgasm. His kinks were satisfied, and with that relief came a placid sense of fulfillment, warm and spreading through his muscles, loosening them up. He shrank down, and he felt … sated. Natsu laughed softly as he thought about how Gray's kinks were rubbing off on him.

Drying the device, however, was nearly impossible. Natsu tried, but there was no way to reach inside. Instead, he used the tiniest amount of heat—not enough to melt the plastic—to steam away the water inside the tube. He dressed, and he looked in the mirror to make sure the hard plastic did not stick out too noticeably in his pajama pants. It still felt huge, but it did not look weird.

He went out into the main room and to the bed to find Lucy already asleep. He settled beside her and smiled.

He had been such a mess a few minutes ago, but somehow doing that bit of kinkiness with Lucy around satisfied his desires. He wanted to thank her, but he did not want to wake her, or make her ask why he was thankful. Instead, he lay down facing away from her and fell asleep.


Eight hours later, Natsu woke up to the agony of a morning woody straining against the form-fitting barrier, smothering him in confusion and pain. It took Natsu a moment to realize what the hell was happening, why was his penis confined, why were his balls being pulled so painfully, why did he feel smooth hardness when he reached down to touch that dawn arousal, and how could he get himself free. Then he remembered the chastity belt. Gray wanted him to refrain from touching himself, to be eager for him.

He wished Gray was there right now to free him from this genital cage, to tenderly treat his arousal, or hell, Gray could beat the crap out of his dick and it would not hurt as much as this.

Natsu lay face up in bed, trying not to think about Gray, about woodies, and about Lucy walking around topless.

Wait … what?

Lucy had her shirt off, walking around with a pout. Natsu's cock throbbed worse as he saw those massive tits bouncing around freely.

"Natsu, have you seen my bra?"

"No," he snapped crankily. "Put something on."

"Oh please! How many times have you seen my boobs? Hell, you've touched them."

He remembered that day, and the torture in his crotch shot blinding white pain through his body. Natsu rolled over so he did not have to look at her, and he reached down into the blankets, wishing he could touch himself just a little.

"Never mind. Found it."

He still lay there, wanting Gray so desperately, wanting freedom and relief. The pain and the aching need, the loss of freedom, humiliation, desperation: it all surged within him and made Natsu want to cry from the tsunami of emotions.

"Get dressed, slow poke. We need to meet the client."

He needed to meet Gray. Screw the client, the mission, everything else. He wanted Gray so badly.

Slowly, Natsu got up. He limped to the bathroom and realized once again that he had to somehow piss with this thing on. The pee dibbled out of the opening on the bottom, and he carefully washed it. Being so constantly aware of his genitals was starting to become mentally tiring.

Somehow, as the day went on, he could almost forget he was wearing the device. He listened to the client describe the dog. Natsu took a deep sniff of the dog's favorite blanket to get the scent. He and Lucy walked around the town to all the spots where the owner said the dog might be. It took a few hours, sniffing and following old scents, but finally Natsu was sure he smelled the invisible dog. He kept sniffing until he was right in front of the smell. Then Lucy used a net to trap the canine, and as it struggled, the dog became visible again. Natsu put the tiny puppy into a pet cage the owner had lent to them to transport the dog back home. As they walked back to the client's house, the dog began to whine.

"Poor thing, all caged up," Lucy said, pouting at the dog. "Aww, you hate being in a cage, don't you? Do you like being free? You just like to play, don't you? Maybe we can play together when we get you home. I'll pet you and play with you as much as you want."

Natsu almost lost his balance as, for a brief moment, he imagined that Lucy was saying those words to his penis. What an odd imagination he had! And it made him want to get hard again. He quickened the pace to end this mission in a hurry.

However, when they brought the dog back, after a heartfelt reunion with the owner, the dog appeared to want to play with Lucy. Glad for the help, the owner allowed her to take the dog into the backyard to play.

"I want to thank you two so much," the middle-aged man said with a jovial smile on his triple-chinned face. "Especially you, young man. It was your amazing nose that found my sweet little Griffin. Such a cute little nose too."

"Uh, thanks," Natsu said awkwardly. He hated when people called him cute.

"Can I touch it?"

"What?"

"Your nose."

Natsu raised an eyebrow. "Uh, sure, I guess so." Weirdo!

The old man lifted a delicate but plump finger, hesitated, and then softly bopped Natsu on the nose. The client squealed in delight and did a little dance. Natsu took a step back with a grimace. Freak!

"You're just so cute," the man exclaimed. Natsu flinched inside at having someone say that to him, but he was trying hard to be polite. "Come, I made some cookies for your trip back home. Help me pack them up while the girl plays with Griffin."

Natsu followed the man back inside the house and to the kitchen. He could already smell the cookies and began to salivate from the aroma.

"Do you like sweet things?" the client asked as he let Natsu walk in first. He lingered by the door with a finger pressed to his bright red lips.

"I love cookies," Natsu said with a grin. Maybe this weirdo wasn't so bad after all.

"I adore sweet things. My dog is sweet. My food is sweet." Suddenly, Natsu heard the man lock the kitchen door. "You're sweet. Your sweet button nose. Your sweet smile. That sweet semi-hardness in your pants that has been there since you first arrived."

Natsu backed up, shocked that someone finally noticed it.

The man sucked on his finger coyly. "Do I intrigue you that much?"

"Wait a minute here," Natsu protested.

"It's all right."

"I'm not interested," he insisted vehemently.

"That," and the man glanced to the lump in Natsu's trousers, "says otherwise."

Natsu opened his mouth, but then shut it hard. There was no way he could tell a client about his kinky side. It could shame Fairy Tail.

"I can make it worth your while. I know how desperately wizards need money," the man said quietly. "There's a hefty bonus, if you're willing to stay just one more night … here … in my home."

Natsu glared protectively. "Lucy would never have sex for money, you pervert."

"I'm not interested in her." The man's eyes narrowed lecherously. "She mentioned needing money for rent. You could easily pay her rent for three months with the … bonus I'm willing to pay."

Natsu snarled as his pride as a wizard was put into question by this man's desires. "Wizards don't prostitute themselves."

"It wouldn't even need to involve sex. Just stand there," he said, drawing closer, and Natsu backed up, sneering in disgust. "Let me admire your young body, gaze upon your taut muscles, and fantasize over you. You wouldn't have to do anything but stand there. You can even keep your eyes closed if it's my body that repulses you. Of course, if you feel so inclined, I'd increase the bonus heftily based on how much you … help me." Natsu's back hit the sink, and the client leaned in close to him. "I would love to feel that sweet, hard cock in me. By how aroused you've been since arriving, I think you want it too. Don't you, sweet little boy?"

The man reached quickly to Natsu's crotch, and before the Dragon Slayer could react, those groping fingers felt the smooth hardness.

"What the…?"

Natsu snarled. "Don't call me boy." Flames flickered over his skin. "Have you already paid Lucy?"

"What? Y-yes. Are you wearing a…?"

"Good!" Natsu punched the man's face, sending him flying across the kitchen and smashing into a cooling rack with all the cookies. "What a waste of food," Natsu grumbled as the client's bleeding nose and mouth dripped onto the scattered cookies.

He rushed out of the kitchen, ran to the backyard, and grabbed up the dog.

"We're leaving, Lucy," he said sternly. Natsu carried the dog back inside so it would not disappear and get lost again. "Poor puppy, having a perverted owner like that." He patted the dog on the head, grabbed Lucy's hand, and yanked her out of the house.

She stumbled as she tried to keep up with him. "Natsu, what's the matter with you?"

"He's a pervert," he snapped. "He wanted to pay us for sex."

"What?" she screamed. "He wanted to have sex with me?"

Natsu decided not to tell her that the client's real goal was him. "Can we go straight home?"

"Definitely. I'm not spending another night in this town with that pervert around."


They had a long trip back and did not arrive in Magnolia until almost midnight. Natsu walked Lucy home to make sure she stayed safe. Then he went to his house, still feeling angry.

And also relieved. If not for the chastity belt, he would have the feel of that man's gross hands lingering on his groin. Instead, he had felt nothing but some pressure from the groping touch. Maybe it was not such a bad thing after all.

When he opened the door, he called out for Happy, but there was no answer. He guessed the three Exceeds were still away on their mission. He dumped his bag and dragged his feet to the bedroom.

There, he saw Gray sitting on the bed. The ice wizard had his arms folded and a cocky smile.

"I was wondering when you'd finally come home, flame-brain."

"Gray!" Natsu raced over and leaped at him, tackling him down.

Gray laughed and hugged him. "Wow, someone sure misses me."

"I couldn't stop thinking about you. I couldn't stop … needing you."

"Is that so?" Gray said, stroking the Dragon Slayer's back. "I'm glad I got home early. Were you a good dragon?"

Natsu pulled away and looked aside. "M-mostly."

Gray arched an eyebrow with an amused smirk. "Mostly? Did you do anything naughty?"

"I … um … I … pissed in the shower. That thing was hard to clean, so I … I…"

"That sounds so hot," Gray moaned. "Would you do that again? Would you do it for me?"

Natsu looked up with huge eyes. "What?"

"Wearing this." He reached down to the plastic cage in Natsu's pants. "Peeing with this on, in the shower. I wanna watch you pee while wearing it."

Natsu instantly tried to go hard, and immediately the confining cage reminded him that he still couldn't, not yet. But soon … very soon.

"Do it, and I'll release you."

Release. Freedom. He could let his cock go fully erect, and all he had to do was pee.

"Gimme a glass of water," Natsu said with a tense throat.

Gray fetched the water, and Natsu began to unpack his bag.

"A mission?" Gray asked.

Natsu gulped the glass down in one go. Then he handed the cup back and waved for it to be refilled. "Lucy wanted to go on one, and I didn't really have a good reason not to."

"How did that work out for you?"

"Uncomfortable," he admitted. "Then there was the client. He was a total perv, and he tried to grab my crotch."

The glass Gray had refilled suddenly frosted over. "He what?"

"I punched him," Natsu assured. "Good thing for the chastity belt, eh?"

"I'm making you wear that all the time now," Gray insisted.

"No way! Once in a while, maybe, but this damn thing makes me think about sex all the time, including sex with other people, and I don't want to think about sex with anyone else."

Gray glared angrily. "Sex with whom?"

Natsu took the glass and heated it so the ice would melt. "With Lucy. Can you imagine that?"

Gray glowered and looked aside, feeling like he had been punched in the gut. "With Lucy, huh?"

"I don't want her, idiot."

"Obviously you do, at least subconsciously."

"She happened to be the only person around. It didn't help that she was prancing around topless. Hey," he said, gazing directly at the sour-face. "I want you. I keep getting hard whenever I think about you, and that makes me hurt, which makes me desperate. Right now, I desperately want to piss, so I can take this damn thing off." He downed the glass of water. "Another!"

Gray fetched one more glass of water, which Natsu sipped as the sensation of needing to pee began to tingle him. "Other than the perverted client and Lucy messing with your head, what did you think about it?"

Natsu looked down at the bulge he thought was totally noticeable, yet no one but a perv had seen it in two days. "It's … kinky. It makes me hyper-aware of my cock. It's … fun, being out in public, wearing this, thinking about if people will notice. I don't like you being gone, but this makes me constantly think about you."

"When you were pissing in the shower, did you think about me while doing that?"

Natsu blushed and sipped some more water. "Y-yeah."

"Did you like it?"

"It felt … naughty."

Gray licked his lips, staring at how Natsu began to squirm. "Let's go for a walk."

Natsu looked up in shock. "But it's midnight, and I'll have to pee in a few minutes."

"If we stay here, I'll be fucking you in a few seconds. Let's take a walk. I need to cool off."

So they stepped outside into the cool night air. Natsu took Gray's hand, happy to feel those cold fingers once more. They walked out into the woods and to a nearby creek, strolling along the moonlit shore. Natsu sighed happily. He still felt the plastic cage around his cock, but now he knew the person who could liberate him was right beside him. All he had to do was please Gray, and he would be free once more.

It took not even ten minutes before Natsu felt the water hit his bladder. The gurgling creek was of no help.

"We should head back," he told Gray.

The ice wizard glanced over heatedly, gazing at the twitching in Natsu's face. "Do you really have to go?"

"I will soon."

Gray licked his lips hungrily. He smiled slyly to himself. "Can I stay out here with you just a little longer?" He squeezed Natsu's arm tighter, hanging onto him. "I really missed being with you."

Natsu felt warm inside hearing that, and Gray looked so cute clutching him. "Sure. A little longer."

They walked on. Five minutes later, Natsu knew he had to turn around.

"If you want me in the shower, we need to head back now. Otherwise, I'm pissing in a bush."

So Gray turned them around, and they went back up the pathway along the stream. The sound of the water seemed so loud to Natsu. His bladder felt full, jiggling with each step, and as the minutes ticked by, he felt the need growing. He began to pant, swallowing hard as the urgency increased. Gray glanced over, watching that sweet discomfort in Natsu's face, needing to release so badly, but still holding it. He knew Natsu could have yanked his pants off and pissed in a bush, so to see him waiting, holding it, struggling just for him, felt intensely satisfying and erotic.

"Hurry, Gray," Natsu whimpered, gulping hard and reaching down to his jostling filled bladder.

"How bad is it?"

"I'll barely make it home in time."

"Then…" Suddenly, Gray slammed Natsu up against a tree and kissed him hard. Natsu struggled against him.

"I'm serious, Gray!"

"Say it," he sneered.

"Say what?"

"That you have to pee," Gray said salaciously, nipping down Natsu's neck. "Say it."

Quietly, Natsu whined, "I really have to pee."

Gray groaned as his erection grew and strained in his pants. "How bad?"

"I'm totally ready to piss."

"Does it hurt?"

"Um … it's starting to."

Gray released him and took his hand. Natsu wanted to rush, but Gray strolled slowly.

"Gray, seriously! I've gotta go."

"You can hold it," he said sadistically.

"You're a huge perv."

"You're the one wearing a chastity belt."

That was true, and the cage was making his engorging cock ache more.

Natsu tried to keep walking. He rubbed the pain in his bladder. He clenched, but he felt his penis swelling with the urgency to pee.

"I'm seriously ready to burst, Gray." Natsu reached down to his pants. "Dammit, I can't even grab it to hold back."

"That bad?"

"It's about to drip."

"Oh God," Gray moaned lustfully. "Okay, we'll hurry."

They ran quickly along the shadowy forest path, but Natsu was whimpering now, walking oddly.

"Gray," he whined. "It's … it's dripping. Shit! Screw this, I'm peeing in a bush."

"Don't, Natsu. You can hold it. We're almost home."

Natsu clenched up and kept going, but his bladder was now in pain. "Fuck! Damn! Ow! Crap, I can smell it. It's leaking out."

Gray saw the house up ahead. "See, we're home."

Natsu stopped walking, leaned over a bit, and handed Gray the keys. "Get the house open. I'm … I'm totally ready to go. I'm … leaking," he confessed in humiliation. "I'll need to run to the bathroom or I'll drip on the floor."

Gray took the house keys and hurried. He was so aroused by Natsu's desperate situation, the way he whimpered, the breathless tone of his voice, and the slight pain in his face, plus knowing Natsu was putting up with this humiliation just for him. He desperately wanted to see Natsu lose it in the shower. He unlocked the house and whistled back. Natsu limped forward. In the clearing, as the moonlight shined on him, Gray saw a dark spot on the front of Natsu's pants. He really was losing it, and that made Gray's erection surge.

"I'll be in the bathroom," Gray called over. "Hurry there."

He rushed inside, heart pounding, and he heard Natsu's running feet following, with soft sobbing of shame as Natsu hurried through his house with piss on his pants. Gray reached the bathroom and instantly stripped his clothes off. Natsu came a moment later, and Gray saw the dark spot had spread.

"I'm leaking so much, Gray," he cried out. "Help me undress. I'm about to … fuck!"

Natsu ran to the shower and stood there while urine slid down his legs.

"Oh God. Oh … God! Dammit."

Natsu cringed and began to cry. His face turned up, utterly mortified, not wanting to watch, wishing he could have held it back just another minute. Instead, here he was, peeing his pants. He felt the hot liquid and the wet fabric sticking to his legs. He let out a suppressed sob of humiliation.

Gray yanked those pants off of the Dragon Slayer, pulling them down and off his feet so fast, Natsu barely realized they were gone. Then Gray watched as the urine flowed out of the slit in the chastity cage and dripped down to the shower floor.

"That … is hot," he groaned. His mouth wrapped around that dick-shaped plastic cage, and he let the piss flow into his mouth. He gulped down the hot, bitter fluid. "Ugh! So fucking hot," he growled.

"You're a jerk, making me piss myself," Natsu grumbled.

While the urine was still flowing, Gray unlocked the chastity belt and pulled it off. Still, Natsu looked away in shame as piss streamed out into the shower.

"You are the sexiest man in the world," Gray sneered, letting the urine drip over his fingers and feeling the wet heat. "Damn, I wanna fuck you!"

Before Natsu was even finished, Gray spun him around and slammed his chest against the tile. Then, with no prepping, he yanked Natsu's butt cheeks to the side.

"No, wait!" Natsu screamed.

Gray rammed his cock in hard, tearing his way inside. Natsu cried out profanities, but Gray bit hard on his shoulder.

"Hold still," he snarled through gripping teeth.

"Dammit, Gray! I'm not even done pissing."

"I know. So … fucking … hot!" He pounded in as he heard the last of the dripping piss and felt the hot liquid swirl past his toes on its way to the drain.

"Gray! Shit, that's … ow!"

Natsu cried out and arched back into that sweetly painful dick pounding in him. With his bladder empty, his cock filled up hard. He had been needing this … so much!

"Touch me," he begging.

Gray reached around and grabbed his turgid arousal. "Like this?"

"Oh God, yes!"

Natsu fisted up his hands. He wanted this so badly. He had been aching more than ever. Finally, his cock was free, and all he could do was shiver in Gray's hands.

"Gray, I … I need to be … O-oh … oh God, no!"

Natsu came so quickly, he did not even have time to demand being restrained. Instead, his hands gripped into the wall, clawing at it, and he roared as his body lost control. All that pent-up desire spurted with dire need. It felt so good, so relieving.

And then, he blacked out.

Gray suddenly felt Natsu go limp. He pulled out quickly and grabbed hold of him.

"Natsu!" he shouted in a panic. He laid the Dragon Slayer down in the shower and saw the satisfied smile on his face. "Idiot. You didn't give me time to finish." He kissed Natsu's forehead. "Mmm, it's good to be back home."

He washed Natsu carefully, cleaning with gentle touches so as not to wake him. He put some lotion on the chaffed skin and medicine on the bleeding ass he had pounded without warning or preparation. Still, Natsu did not wake up. Then he carried Natsu to bed. Gray went back, jumped in the shower, and stroked himself while thinking about what he had just seen.

He looked over to the pants piled up on the floor, soaked in urine, a yellow spot on the white material. Seriously, that had been way too hot, watching Natsu limping, listening to him whimpering, seeing him growing more and more desperate, and the humiliation as he felt himself peeing his pants.

"Oh God," Gray moaned as he stroked faster. "Fu- … gah … N-Natsu! Y-You … are so … hot! Oh God, gonna … nngh!"

He watched as white shot out and painted Natsu's shower wall. Gray panted, utterly overwhelmed. God, if Natsu thought he needed to come, that was nothing compared to how desperately Gray had been wanting him all night since returning to Magnolia.

"I'm seriously messed up over that guy," he huffed heavily as the shower washed the cum away.

Once he was cleaned up and dried, Gray washed Natsu's clothes. He scrubbed and sterilized the chastity belt; then he put it away neatly in its special box. He went through the house and cleaned up a few drops Natsu had spilled as he raced to the bathroom. He did not want the Dragon Slayer to feel ashamed to the point of not wanting to try this again.

Because Gray definitely wanted to watch Natsu piss again. Especially while wearing that chastity belt. That was absolutely something he wanted to try again, if it made Natsu react that strongly.

He lay down with the Dragon Slayer, gazing at the exhausted face in the moonlight. Gray moved a few stray pink hairs aside. Before drifting off, he realized this was the first time he had slept in Natsu's bed. It was also the first time they had sex without bondage. Then again, Natsu had lasted less than two minutes.

But that was fine. Seeing him like that was worth it.

Gray hugged the sleeping Dragon Slayer, closed his eyes, and dreamed of Natsu squirming with need.

Chapter Text

Gray woke up to a different smell. It was not like he always noticed smells the way Natsu did, but he at least knew this was not the smell of his own house. There was also heat beside him. He opened his eyes and saw Natsu curled up on his side, asleep on top of Gray's arm, looking so adorable, almost childlike … and drooling.

Gray yanked his arm out from under the pink head and grimaced at the hot saliva that dripped over his skin. That woke Natsu up with a sleepy grumble of "Huh?"

"You drooled on my arm, bastard," Gray snapped.

"Mmm … sowwy," Natsu muttered, still half asleep.

Gray wiped the arm with a sheet. Then he looked down at the sleeping Dragon Slayer. He stroked his fingers through the cerise strands and smiled down at his wild lover.

"Hey, Natsu?" He got only a sleepy grunt in reply. "I want to tell the guild. I don't want to hide it anymore. It's not fair to our friends."

"Not 'til Happy's home," came another somnolent sigh.

"I guess so," Gray realized. If they came out while Happy was away, the poor Exceed would feel bad that he had missed such an important announcement. Then Gray saw a strange crimson and maroon mark on Natsu's shoulder near the neck. He touched it, and Natsu jolted with a hiss of pain.

"What is it?" the Dragon Slayer moaned.

"It's teeth marks, I think. Probably that's where I bit you last night. I didn't realize I did it that hard."

Natsu sat up this time and rubbed his neck right over where it ached. "Did it break skin?"

"No, just deeply bruised. Sorry, I didn't realize—"

"It's fine to break skin." His head suddenly flopped back onto the pillow. "Do it with your teeth. It marks us as a mating couple. Already tasted your blood," he said, slowly falling asleep again. "Then … you taste mine. Teeth … marking us … my mmmmate … coup- … -ple…" Quickly, he was asleep again.

Gray smiled plaintively. "Your mate, huh?"

Did Natsu mean more than what they already were? They were dating secretly for now. Being a marked mating couple … did that mean…?

"Natsu, I'm home."

Natsu bolted up in bed. Gray's eyes went wide, and they stared at each other in a moment of guilty panic. They were in bed together … and naked. Gray suddenly scrambled out of the bed, flinging sheets aside, and raced across the room.

"Gray, it's okay. We can tell him…"

Gray grabbed a clear box that held the penis-shaped chastity device. "Do you want Happy to see this?"

Natsu went pale. Although in a box, the plastic cage looked immensely kinky with its anatomical shape. Gray yanked only his pants on and grabbed his shirt, boxers, socks, and shoes.

"We'll tell everyone together," he said, and Gray gave Natsu a quick kiss on the lips before jumping out the bedroom window.

Natsu was still in a daze as he watched Gray fleeing away from the house. Just then, the bedroom door opened and Happy walked in.

"Oh, you're in here," the little blue Exceed said. "Are you just now waking up?"

"Uh … yeah … mission yesterday. I didn't get back until after midnight."

"It must have been a hard mission. You have a huge bruise on your shoulder."

Natsu reached up to the bite mark with a jolt of panic. "This? Uh … I got this later. So hey, you gotta tell me all about New Extalia and your mission."

Happy was more than eager to tell him all the details. Natsu dressed as he listened. He wrapped the scarf around to hide the love bite. He discovered that Gray had cleaned and folded his clothes that were soiled last night. How sweet of him!

Soon—very soon, he hoped—he and Gray would announce their relationship to everyone.


Gray was in a great mood. More than great. He felt like dancing, singing, turning cartwheels, and jumping up and down while clapping his hands like a child. The past week had been amazing. It hardly mattered that Happy came home so suddenly. The chastity belt experiment was phenomenal, and Natsu seemed to be getting over his issues way faster than Gray could hope for. As they went through a life living together, they were discovering the little secrets between the two that made a relationship easier to handle.

Best of all, earlier that week Natsu had hinted about taking a mission, just the two of them, that just so happened to involve a stay in a fancy resort hotel. Nothing was finalized, it was just something they talked about one evening over dinner, but Gray really wanted a vacation for just the two of them, some faraway place where they could act like a couple without constantly worrying about getting caught.

He wanted to tell the guild soon. Gray knew the risks. He had left bruises on Natsu, and the Dragon Slayer had marked him plenty of times. He still had bruises from the bites Natsu gave him days ago—those had been some nasty bruises—and Natsu had those teeth marks on his shoulder now. Coming out to their friends meant that if anyone noticed the bruises and bites, they would know what Natsu and Gray did.

It meant getting discovered as a man who liked kinky stuff. However, that was a risk Gray was willing to take if it meant he and Natsu could date openly and hold hands in the guild hall.

He chuckled to himself as he wondered how people would react. Probably everyone would be shocked. Half the guild would drop their jaws to the floor. Erza just might faint. Lucy would squeal and want details. Juvia would need to be hauled down to the harbor, so she would not flood the place in tears. He wanted to see their reactions.

Erza sat down beside him at the bar and immediately struck up a casual conversation. "I heard you went on an emergency call up north. I didn't think you'd be back so soon."

"It wasn't that challenging, and I rushed back," he admitted.

"Rushed? Why?"

Gray smiled happily to himself. "There was a certain person I wanted to get back to quickly."

"Another girlfriend?" she asked, but Gray did not answer. "I don't normally see you smile like that over just another girl. She must be special."

"Very special," Gray whispered, wanting so badly to tell Erza outright.

"I see. Is it serious? How long have you been dating?"

"We've been together for over a month."

"That long? I didn't know. Have you brought her in here?"

He chuckled as he realized he had brought his date many times. However, he replied, "When was the last time I brought a girlfriend into the guild?"

"Never," she realized. "Loke was the only one who did things like that. Well, I would like to meet her."

He laughed again as he wondered how the redhead would react when he told her the truth.

"But Gray, I'm a little concerned. I mean, you pick up girls for one-night-stands a lot."

"I haven't done that in a long time," he snapped.

"That's good, but … well, there's no delicate way for me to ask this. You're clean, right?"

He looked over in confusion. "Clean? I showered last night."

"Don't play dumb, Gray. When was the last time you were tested?"

"Gajeel challenged me four days ago."

"Gray! I mean for sexually transmitted diseases. You have gotten tested for that, right?"

He stared at her blankly. "Huh?"

She rubbed a pulsing vein out of her forehead. "Are you telling me that with how much you sleep around, you have never been tested?"

Slowly, Gray felt a chill creeping up his limbs. She had a point. He used to have sex with just about anyone who gave in after a few drinks. He had never gone to check if sleeping around did anything to his health.

"I would know," he reasoned hesitantly. "I mean, I'd have … warts or something."

"It doesn't work that way all the time." Erza sighed as she realized Gray really was clueless about something this important. "If you care for this girl, you better get tested. For her sake, I hope you've been using a condom every time. Seriously, go see a doctor. There's a clinic on Guava Street. If money is a problem, I'll even pay for it. I want you to be healthy, and I sure hope you are, because if you're sick, you're probably going to lose that girl when you tell her you probably gave her some virus."

"Lose…" Icy dread struck through Gray. "That wouldn't happen," he cried out.

Erza just stared at him, feeling a bit sorry for the guy. By that look of terror and disbelief, she could see that, whoever this mystery girlfriend was, Gray really had fallen for her. "Go right now, Gray. I'm serious. Before you sleep with that girl again … what's her name, anyway? I hate calling her that girl. Natsu is the same; he never did tell me his girlfriend's name, and now I don't want to ask because it might upset him. I was curious who would date a guy like him."

Instead of answering—and maybe to get out of saying anything—Gray bolted off his seat and ran out the door. He went for a walk around town, thinking about what Erza said.

It was stupid. If he had caught some sexually transmitted disease, he would know. He had been with Natsu for over a month, and he had never gotten sick. He would know!

Wouldn't he?

Something kept nagging his heart. He found his feet taking him to Guava Street and the medical clinic there. It was a family planning clinic, the sort of place desperate couples went to as a last resort for unwanted pregnancies, or people looking for cheap birth control … or people who needed to be tested after a wild night. He stared at the respectable brick building, but he dreaded stepping inside.

There was a reason he had never bothered to get tested. It was humiliating. He would have to walk in there, ask to get that sort of test, probably have some doctor examine his genitals, and if anyone in there recognized him … hell, half of Fiore probably recognized him now, thanks to the Grand Magic Games. People would talk. Rumors would spread. Someone from Sorcerer Weekly might write an article about 'The stripper wizard who slept around now has to get STD tests.'

Even worse: what if something came back positive? The fear of knowing the truth was what really made him hesitate now.

If he knew the truth, he would have to tell Natsu. It was the ethical thing to do. However, if he had something, and Natsu had it too now, wouldn't it be natural for Natsu to dump him as a boyfriend?

Ignorance is bliss, as they say.

However, the more he put it off, the worse it would be. If Natsu got sick on his own, only to find out it was Gray who made him sick because he never got tested, that would be far worse than getting tested now and dealing with the results together.

"It'll be fine," he told himself. "I'm totally not sick."

He walked inside, and the bustling of Magnolia vanished, leaving a void of silence only slightly filled in by soft classical music playing from somewhere. The entryway was sterile but pleasant, with waxy wood floors and potted plants. A nurse sitting behind a desk looked up.

"Welcome," she said in a far-too-cheery voice.

Gray came forward, glancing around nervously. Luckily, there was only one other person in the waiting room, a fatherly-looking man reading the latest Sorcerer Weekly. Gray saw Natsu on the cover, as if ready to set the whole magazine on fire, with a bold title: ALL FIRED UP FOR SUMMER. When the hell did that flame-brain run off and do modeling?

"H-Hi," Gray said, dropping his voice and hoping no one recognized him from the magazine. "Do you guys do … you know … testing?" He sincerely hoped the pitch of his voice and look in his eyes were enough.

Apparently, this young nurse had seen other people come in asking the same thing, and her cheery voice also dropped to something more calming. "Yes, sir. We have that sort of testing."

He gulped hard and glanced back to the other patient, but the man was absorbed in the article he was reading, probably waiting for his wife to finish with her appointment.

"Would you like to have that done?" the nurse asked, keeping her voice confidential.

"Y-yeah. What does it involve?"

"A doctor will do a physical examination, take a swabbing, and draw some blood. He may recommend other tests if he deems it prudent."

"Okay." He felt a little better with that. "How soon can I know?"

"We have a lab here, so results are usually within the day. We can do it right now and let you know by this evening."

"O-okay."

"Fill out this form please, sir. It's a basic patient form: contact information, general health, et cetera."

Gray took the clipboard, sat in a chair, and began to fill in the information. While he wrote, another person came in, someone with an appointment. She checked in with the nurse, who had to go inform the doctor, and she sat down to wait. Again, Gray was terrified someone might recognize him and wonder why he was in a normal clinic when wizards had their own healers.

He turned in the filled clipboard and waited nervously. Erza's words had him in chills. What if his days of sleeping around really had taken their toll? What about Natsu? If he had some virus that others could catch, would he have to give up being a wizard?

What if it was fatal?

"Gray Fullbuster," a nurse called out.

He leaped at that name, and finally the man with the magazine looked up. Gray cursed, wishing he had put a fake name on the paperwork.

"Come on back, sir."

"Ah, yes. Thanks." He hurried forward just to get out of that waiting room. He saw out of the corner of his eye, the man looked down at the magazine, and then up to Gray. Shit! His picture must have made it into the magazine again.

The nurse took him to a small room and told him to wait for the doctor. It was a long, anxiety-filled wait. Finally, an older gentleman in a white lab coat entered and introduced himself. He explained the tests, what they would be looking for, and assured Gray that testing was a standard procedure, nothing to feel ashamed about. Still, Gray blushed as he dropped his pants and allowed the doctor to examine his genital area. Thankful, little touching was involved. Then the doctor took a swab and inserted it into the urethra. That was uncomfortable, but how the doctor did it was not painful.

"I'll get this to the lab. You may get dressed. The nurse will be in for the blood test."

For once, Gray was happy to yank his clothes back on. He felt humiliated, but he kept telling himself, this was what he really should do, for Natsu's sake.

The cute young nurse returned with a metal tray of supplies. "This is just a standard blood drawing. Stick your arm out, sir. I'll wrap this rubber band around your upper arm, you'll feel a little prick, and we'll take a couple vials."

Gray sat with his arm held out. He had blood tests before, but never for anything so potentially life-altering. He was tense and sweating when the needle stabbed into his skin. He cried out in shock, "Ow!"

"Sorry about that. Try to relax. It'll go in easier if you relax your muscles."

Gray flinched inside. How many times had he said those same words to Natsu while piercing him with his penis? Would he ever be able to say those words again, or feel inside that heat? If he had caught something…

"Alrighty! All done." She removed the needle and put on a bandage. Gray flexed his elbow while putting pressure on the needle hole to stop the bleeding faster and minimize bruising. "Come back around … let's say, quarter 'til five. We should have the results back from the lab."

"Thank you. Should I do anything?"

"No, just come back on time. We close at five o'clock."

"Okay. Um … I'll see you then."

Her sunny smile was back. "Have a good day, sir."

Gray turned away. If this had happened a month ago, he might have flirted up this gorgeous, young nurse. Now, he felt unworthy to even look in her eyes. The last thing he felt like doing was smiling.


It was evening, and Gray had avoided the guild. He also didn't go home, fearing that if he did, Natsu would come over and find him. He was not ready to face the Dragon Slayer yet.

He now sat in a room with medical posters on the wall for patients to look at, an assortment of instruments, and the raised, hard bed with waxy paper to cut down on germs. As he sat there, thinking about the worst, he wondered if this flimsy paper was really enough to protect people from the diseases living in a human body.

Those dark thoughts were interrupted by the doctor opening the door. He was staring down at a chart and only briefly glanced up to make sure this was the right patient.

"Gray Fullbuster?"

He jolted. "Y-yes?"

The doctor shut the door behind him, and to Gray it sounded like the thud of a prison gate. "We got your results back. I … have some bad news."

Gray felt his heart plummet. "Oh God," he whispered, ready to panic, unable to inhale. His entire world that Natsu had slowly heated up with his warm smile suddenly frosted over.

"The lab came back with two positives."

"Two?" Gray shouted, but he quickly covered his mouth before he screamed anything else, such as the string of profanity racing through his head.

"It's all right, sir. They're both curable."

Gray let out a deep sigh. Curable! That word had never sounded so wonderful.

"The first, you maybe have heard of: gonorrhea."

"Oh shit," Gray groaned. It was like some nightmare.

"This other is called trichomoniasis, or just trich. It's common, and a single dose of antibiotics is all you need. Curing the gonorrhea will be a little more challenging, but there are medications. In men, both conditions can be present without symptoms, which is probably why you never realized you had it. I have to ask," the doctor added solemnly. "Have you had any partners since whenever you think you may have contracted this?"

Contracted? "I … I don't even know when I did."

"Have you had any unprotected sex lately?"

Gray thought back to the time before Natsu. "I used to get drunk, pick up ladies. That was a while back, though," he insisted.

"You could have caught it months ago, or with trich, even up to two years ago."

"I know at least once, the lady—" His eyes went wide. "Oh shit, that lady."

It was a lady he picked up at a bar shortly before hooking up with Natsu: gorgeous beyond dreams, wild and flirty, just the way he liked them. He had taken her home, and she was too eager to ride him, refusing to let him get up even to get the condom. Gray had been too drunk to care at the time. He only worried in the morning haze of a hangover that maybe she could have gotten pregnant. She had assured him she was on birth control. Then she kissed him goodbye and left the house. He never saw her again. He had been relieved to hear she was on birth control, and foolishly he assumed that meant she was safe.

How wrong he was!

"You may want to warn her."

Gray jolted at the doctor's advice, but he sank down at he realized something awful. "I didn't even get her name."

"I see." The doctor showed complete professional comportment to that confession. "Ethically, you should warn anyone you have had as a sexual partner since then."

"Partner?" Pink hair and a smiling face came to mind. "Natsu…"

The keen doctor saw the look in Gray's horrified eyes. "Are you currently in a relationship?"

"Y-yeah. A … well … a boyfriend." He worried if this doctor would sneer, but he was a true professional.

"Have you two had sex?"

Gray blushed at such bluntness. "Yeah, but every time I … um … came inside … I was wearing a condom. Yesterday, I … I penetrated him without protection, but I didn't come inside. Would that be okay?" he asked in worry.

"Unfortunately, with infections like gonorrhea, it's not a hundred percent that even a condom will be enough. You can catch it without ejaculating, since any fluid, even preseminal, vaginal or mucus membranes around the anus, can contain the bacteria. It can also be present on the skin, which is why even a condom is not a hundred percent safe. Male condoms don't cover all the skin. It can spread to your hands, and from there it can infect your own genitals, or your mouth, or even your eyes. Oral gonorrhea is common and often goes without diagnosis, brushed off as being merely a sore throat. Have you two had oral sex?"

That cold plummet hit Gray's chest again. "Oh God," he breathed in horror.

He saw memories of Natsu on his knees, those eyes looking up at him, that hot mouth around him. He shivered as that sweet memory was now tainted with the idea that he had done that with his diseased penis. Natsu had given him such a loving, erotic blowjob, the first time Natsu had ever sucked a man off, and Gray shot his infected cum into that beloved throat.

Gray reached up to his mouth, ready to vomit.

"It's okay, sir," the doctor said calmly.

"No!" Gray shouted in a panic, swallowing hard to keep his stomach down. "If he gets sick…"

"It'll be fine. Calm down and breathe."

Gray snapped at him. "He's my responsibility."

Sternly, the doctor replied back, "And you will be responsible for getting him in here for testing. We can cure you both with antibiotics."

Curable! That word was a lifeline. This was curable. Still…

"God, I was so stupid," Gray shouted. "I should have gotten tested. That one time … hell, every time! I'm not even sure how many people I slept with after her. Three, maybe four … and all of them are probably sick. All because of me. Because I was too damn proud to show my face in a place like this and get the stupid test. Goddammit, what an idiot!"

The doctor sat next to Gray and put a fatherly arm around him. "The fact that you came in here shows that you're not an idiot. Stubborn, maybe, but you obviously love your partner."

Gray looked up in shock. That L-word again! However, this time he could not deny it, not with how scared he felt for Natsu's safety.

"Bring him in here tomorrow."

"Sooner than that!" Gray snapped.

"I'm sorry, sir, but the lab has closed for the night. Besides, results take half a day. Bring him in tomorrow morning. We open at eight. We can have results for him by the afternoon. I'll make sure we have the medication available, as well. In the meantime, do not have sexual intercourse of any kind—oral, anal, or vaginal—until you have completed the medications and tests return clear."

No sex! It was a slap in the face, appropriate punishment for potentially putting Natsu and others at risk with his promiscuity.

"Okay," Gray said, swallowing hard as he shivered with dread. "Oh God, how do I even tell him this?"

The doctor squeezed his shoulders again. "In my experience, being bluntly honest about bad news is best. He may be sad, shocked, even angry, but skirting around the issue doesn't lessen the blow. In the end, this is about you taking responsibility for your own actions, including making sure you both are safe and healthy. If he loves you at all, then after the shock has worn off, he'll respect you for being honest. Right now, he and any other partners you've had need to get tested."

With a lurch of his stomach, he realized that meant Cana too. He would have to get her somewhere private and warn her. He had to take back control, and that meant doing the ethical thing. He needed to man up to his mistake and warn people. Maybe it was that lady, maybe he had caught it earlier, he had no clue, so it was best to be safe, even if it meant admitting he had a sexually transmitted disease to every person who ever shared his bed.

"Right," he said firmly, realizing he had to be mature about this. "Thank you."

"I can recommend a psychologist to help you and your partner through this, if you'd like."

"No," he muttered. "It's fine, just … just a shock." He still felt numbed by the news. "At least it can be cured, right? At least it wasn't … something…" Something fatal. Something that would kill him, and slowly kill Natsu as well. "I couldn't have lived with myself if I made him sick like that." Tears threatened to come to his eyes as he realized that, for how bad it seemed, it could have been a whole lot worse.

Right now, he needed to get out of that office and collapse into Natsu's arms.


That night, he took Natsu out on a date. It was a twist for them, with Gray picking the restaurant and offering to pay. Natsu looked so happy to go out again, but he realized Gray's smiles were all forced. He smelled fear, and for a while he dreaded this was one of those break up dates Lucy cried about, when a boyfriend took her out to somewhere really nice almost as an apology before dropping the bomb that he wanted to break up.

Instead, the bomb Gray dropped was far worse. At least he waited until they finished eating, although he could barely stomach the food. As he confessed everything, his eyes stayed down at a speck of sauce on his plate.

Natsu dropped his fork, and it clattered against the nearly-empty platter. Gray's eyes stayed downcast, unable to look at Natsu at all.

"You … have what?"

"Gonorrhea and trich," he whispered, hoping no one else in the restaurant could hear him over the low din of conversations and chewing food. "I know it's a shock, but—"

"Did you cheat on me?"

"What…? No!" Gray cried out softly.

"How did you get this?"

"It was from before you."

Natsu stared incredulously. "Before?" he bellowed. "After how long we've been together, you're just now finding this out?" Gray realized that a nice restaurant was a bad idea. Luckily, the setting did not go unnoticed to Natsu. He dropped his voice as he growled. "Gray…"

"I'm sorry, Natsu. It was damn stupid of me. I'm really sorry."

"It was stupid!" His voice cracked, and he slammed his mouth shut before he screamed again. His fists drew up to suppress the anger, and Natsu's face contorted as he tried to stay calm. "So, do I have this too?"

"I don't know," Gray said honestly. "You could. You'll need to go in and get tested."

Natsu bolted to his feet, and Gray saw how tightly his hands were clenched. The Dragon Slayer was glaring furiously down at him, and something in the side of his jaw was twitching. Gray knew that if they were in any other location, Natsu would have punched him. He was honestly shocked that the Dragon Slayer had the courtesy to hold himself back.

Instead, he seethed, "I need to get out of here."

"Natsu!"

"Pay the bill. I'll wait for you outside." Then he turned and stormed away.

Gray flagged a waiter and paid with ten thousand Jewels, way more than the meal cost, but he did not want to wait for the check. He handed over the money and raced out after Natsu, running past the other diners. He half expected to step outside of the restaurant and right into a flaming fist. Instead, in the amber glow of a streetlight, Gray saw that stern silhouette, white scarf fluttering in a cold breeze, arms folded … no, arms hugging himself. Puffs of hot air smoked in the cold night as he heard the unsteady breathing of someone struggling not to cry. Gray felt like crawling away, but he did not want to leave Natsu alone at a time like this. He took off his coat and draped it around those trembling shoulders.

"How about we walk to the docks?"

Natsu nodded silently and followed beside him, clutching at the white jacket. They did not speak, lost in their own turmoil of thoughts, until they reached the harbor. They walked out onto a pier, and Natsu sat down, letting his legs hang over the edge, staring down into the inky water below. Cautiously, still expecting to get punched, Gray sat beside him. For another minute, neither said anything. Gray was not even sure what more he could say. Sorry was not enough.

"Gray," Natsu finally whispered. "It wasn't me who gave it to you, was it?"

"I told you, it was probably from before."

"But you don't know." Natsu leaned over, resting his face in his hands as he stared at the black waves. "After that time back then, what that man did to me, I always felt … tainted. Filthy."

"Natsu! Really, it wasn't you. You were a kid. If you had caught anything from that time, you'd've had complications years ago. Besides, I'm sure Makarov had you tested. It's standard in cases like that. It wasn't you. I was the idiot who kept picking up drunk women. I should have gotten tested a long time ago, but … I never thought … I mean, I figured if I had something, I'd know. There would be sores or a fever or something. I didn't realize you could have something, even have it for months, and not have any symptoms. I … didn't know. I didn't think to get tested, not until Erza asked if I had. It just never crossed my mind. Which, in hind sight, was stupid of me." He heard Natsu snuffling, and a teardrop fell into the water below, rippling the calm harbor. "Natsu," he sighed, hugging around his shoulders. "I'm so sorry."

"Imagining you with other people is hard enough," he said with a sniffle. "Knowing one of them made you sick makes me so … so angry. Like I wanna go out and punch someone. They … they made you sick."

"Natsu, I'm gonna be fine," he said with more assurance than he had felt all day. "It's curable." He hoped that word acted as a lifeline to Natsu, just as it had when the doctor told him the bad news. "This isn't your fault, and it's not your mistake to fix. It was my mistake for sleeping around and having unprotected sex. It's a mistake for which I'm going to take responsibility. Tomorrow morning, I'm gonna come fetch you. You'll see the same doctor I did. He's really nice. Okay?"

Natsu used his scarf to wipe his eyes. "Yeah, okay. But you…"

"I'm just a bit sick. I'll take medication, and I'll get better. Then it'll be okay. It'll … it'll be okay." Gray felt tears on his own face now as he looked at the dropped head staring into the harbor. "Natsu, please don't tell me you're going to break up with me just because of this."

Natsu looked up in shock. "What?"

"I can be cured. I can!" he insisted loudly in desperation. "He said so. The doctor … he said … it's curable. Curable!"

"Gray?" Natsu reached up and wiped the pouring tears. "What…?"

"I'm scared!" He wrapped his arms around Natsu, grasping him in a crushing hold. After holding it in all evening, from the moment the doctor said I have some bad news, Gray finally broke down into shuddering tears. "I'm … scared," he whispered, sobbing into the white scarf. "I don't want to lose you. I messed up. I seriously fucked up, and I'm sorry. I can't even tell you how much I hate myself, how scared I've been all day, how furious I am for being such an asshole in the past. If it had been worse … if it was fatal … I'd deserve something like that, but not you."

"Don't talk like that."

"I don't want you to be sick," he sobbed. "I c-can't handle that. I hate that I put you in this sort of danger. What sort of dominant am I if I don't make sure I'm safe for my partner? To hell with dominant. What sort of human am I?"

"Gray," Natsu said with a warm tone, rubbing the cold, shivering back. He took the white coat off and wrapped it back around Gray's arms. He tugged the collar up around Gray's neck, smiling into the tear-stained face. "I'm not going to leave you just because of this."

"But I was a total slut, and now I'm sick. I'm … disgusting."

"No! Gray, look at me. You're not disgusting. You were just a typical horny man, and you didn't know. You didn't realize how easy it is to get sick. You've been loyal to me, right?" he asked, looking slightly worried

"I … y-yes. No one else. I'm exclusive. When I find someone worth keeping, I don't cheat. I would never cheat on you."

"Then it's fine. That was in the past, and you're a different person. Both of us are different people compared to before we began dating. We've both gotten better. Now we have each other. Come on. Let me just hold you tonight. I think you need that."

Gray snuffled up his tears. "Y-yeah," he admitted.

"Come over to my place."

"What about Happy?"

"It's fine. He'll find out one day anyway. We'll just be cuddling." Natsu stood up and stretched his hand down to Gray. "Come on."

Gray felt a smile returning to his face. He grabbed Natsu's hot fingers and hoisted himself up. Natsu did not let go of Gray's hand as they walked through Magnolia. He kept squeezing Gray's icy palm, and Gray felt a little warmth return to his heart.

Together, they walked through the moonlight to Natsu's house. When they entered, Happy was eating his own dinner—fish, of course. The blue Exceed looked up with a bright grin.

"Oh, hey Natsu." Then he saw the darker shadow behind him. "What's Gray doing here?"

"Gray's feeling a bit sick," Natsu explained. He tugged the ice wizard to come over the threshold, so he could shut the door and keep the cold air from coming in. "He'll be staying here tonight."

"Oh." Happy pouted and he gazed over at Gray. He could not remember a time when Natsu took care of anyone when they were sick, so this charity toward his rival was confusing. "It's not contagious, is it?"

Gray flinched at that, and Natsu wondered how to explain it. "You won't catch it, don't worry. It's gonna be fine." He grinned back to the ice wizard, who was glaring silently into the fireplace. "Gray," he whispered, patting his cold arm. "It's gonna be fine."

"Right," he said with a raspy tightness to his throat.

Natsu rubbed the tension in that stiff arm with a worried frown. Gray had been silent the whole walk here, and it was obvious he was lost in thought, so Natsu offered, "How about I make you some tea?"

Gray tried to force himself out of his brewing anger and self-loathing. "Y-yeah, that'd be good."

"All right. Just sit down."

Happy watched with mild surprise at seeing the two rivals not at one another's throats for once. "Are you hungry, Gray?"

"Ah, no. I ate."

"I didn't fix you a fish, Natsu."

"I ate too," the Dragon Slayer assured Happy as he got a pot of water boiling.

"Did you two eat together?"

"Yup!"

That was even more shocking to Happy, but he supposed they might have eaten with a group of people, or at the guild. "Should I set up a futon for Gray?"

"No, he's sick. He'll be in my bed."

"A futon for you, then? You burned the hammock."

"Nah, I'll be with Gray."

Happy looked surprised. "Are you going to sleep with him?"

"Well, someone's gotta look after the popsicle."

"I guess so, but…" Happy's eyes widened a little as he began to realize something. Then he smiled and chuckled to himself. "Aye, sir."

Natsu made the tea while Gray continued to sit and stare at the fireplace.

"Hey, Natsu," he whispered.

"The tea's not done yet. Almost."

"It's fine. I just … I want to say … thank you. I mean, I'm a mess right now."

"Yeah, I can tell."

"Thank you for not … for…"

Natsu brought the teacup over, still stirring in sugar, and sat beside the ice wizard. "Gray, I told you, I'm not gonna abandon you just because of this. I'll take care of you."

Gray sniffled up his tears, and finally a smile came to his face. "Thank you," he whispered. "And I'm sorry."

"Stop apologizing and have some tea." He handed the cup over, and Gray blew on it before sipping. "Happy, we're going to retire early. Gray needs rest."

"Is he really sick? Should I get a doctor? I can fly into town and get one if he's really bad."

"We're going to see a doctor tomorrow morning." Natsu glanced over to Gray. "Right? Tomorrow?"

Gray snapped out of his daze. "Y-yeah, tomorrow morning. They open at eight o'clock."

"Then we'll be there right at eight." Natsu grinned back to his blue friend. "Don't worry, Happy. He's just a little sick."

"I can get some juice or something."

"Yeah, sounds good. We've been out of orange juice for weeks."

"Aye! I'll go shopping tomorrow while you guys see the doctor."

"That works. Goodnight, Happy."

"Goodnight, Natsu. I hope you feel better, Gray."

"Y-yeah … thanks."

Natsu pulled Gray around the shoulder to help him to the bedroom, but Happy tugged on Natsu's trouser leg just before he left. Natsu nodded to Gray to go on ahead. They waited until Gray walked in the bedroom alone, and then Happy whispered, "Is Gray pregnant?"

Natsu's eyes widened. "What?"

"Did you get him pregnant? I peeked through the window this morning and saw you two were sleeping together. Is that why he's here? Is that why you're the one taking responsibility? I can keep it a secret if he is, but eventually his tummy will get big and everyone will know."

"No!" he shouted in a whisper voice. "Guys don't get pregnant, and…" Natsu thought to himself, 'And if anything, I'd be the pregnant one.' "He's caught a sickness, that's all."

"Are you sure? You can tell me if you're gonna be a daddy. I'd tell you if I got Carla pregnant, although she won't even accept my fish yet, but if someday one thing leads to another, and she's expecting an egg, I would tell you."

Natsu smiled awkwardly. "Uh … thanks, buddy. I'd tell you too." Still, Natsu felt bad that he hadn't told Happy about him and Gray. "Once Gray's feeling better, I wanna tell you about that person I was dating."

"Did you get her pregnant?"

"No! No one is pregnant. Look, I need to sleep if I'm going to take Gray to the doctor tomorrow."

"I'll be quiet. Does he need medicine?"

"The doctor will prescribe something. Thanks, though. Hey, Happy, would you be upset if Gray stayed here for a while?"

"Is he moving in?"

"Not like that. Just while he's sick."

"That's fine. Are you two good friends now?"

Natsu smiled to himself and glanced over to the bedroom door. "Yeah, we're still rivals, but we're good friends."

"Are you falling in love? Your face is weird, like how Lucy looks when she sees a cute boy."

Natsu felt himself blushing. "M-maybe."

Happy just smiled broadly. "You look a lot happier talking about Gray than when you'd talk about your girlfriend. I hope he doesn't break your heart, or I'll scratch his leg."

Natsu laughed and patted his friend on the head. "If he does anything like that, we'll both scratch him and beat him up, okay?"

"Aye, sir."

Natsu left to the bedroom and shut the door behind him. Gray was still sipping tea and staring at the bed. Natsu got dressed in pajamas, but he saw Gray just stripped naked. After all, that was how he slept in his own house.

"You can use my toothbrush," Natsu assured.

"No," Gray muttered. "This thing can be oral."

"Then I'll brush my teeth first, you brush yours next, and we'll toss the toothbrush. I could probably use a new one, anyway."

With some lackluster bickering, they got their teeth brushed and were ready for bed. Gray sat on the mattress, testing it out carefully. He knew Natsu also slept in a hammock with Happy, but he had this bed for when he wanted to sleep alone. He wondered briefly how many times Natsu must have slipped away into this bedroom to "sleep alone" while actually jerking off. However, then he remembered Natsu saying he had never been able to masturbate to completion. Did he just touch himself into arousal and hover there? That sounded hot.

Those thoughts, as erotic as they were, did nothing for Gray's libido. He was too stuck in the dark pit of despair, where haunting words whispered to him: bad news, two positives, gonorrhea, trich…

Natsu turned off the light, but he saw the ice wizard sitting up, staring out at the stars. Pouting with worry, Natsu walked over to the bed.

"Hey, put the tea down and scoot your butt over. I said I'd snuggle you, and I'm gonna!"

Gray moved a little, but he still did not lie down. Natsu draped his arms around the naked shoulders and clung to Gray's back like some sort of monkey.

"Kainushi?" he whispered into Gray's ear. Instead of the response he wanted, that word caused a faint convulsion through Gray's body. "Hey, you're shivering. Are you crying?"

Gray gave up trying to hide it. He sniffed hard and wiped his nose. In a weak and trembling whisper, he managed to say, "I just … I can't believe…" He let out a miserable sigh. "I feel like an idiot. I feel … like an absolute goddamn idiot."

"I told you, it's gonna be okay. You said it's curable. It's not like you have something that will kill you…"

With all the emotions he had bottled throughout that day, Gray shouted, "Yeah, but I could have. I … I could have had it. Then you'd have it. That keeps running through my head." His fingers reached up into his hair and yanked at his scalp. "I got off lucky. If I had contracted some incurable virus, gave it to you, and you died … Natsu, I can't … I couldn't live with that."

"It didn't happen, Gray. We don't even know if I'm sick. I could be perfectly okay. I mean, we haven't really … you know … done too much. Not like that. I mean, we've done the kinky stuff, but as for actual sex, we haven't done it that many times. Plus you were always careful."

"Not every time."

"Almost every. Even when I didn't think we needed a condom, you used one."

"It takes only once, Natsu."

The Dragon Slayer frowned and hugged Gray, shaking him out of his melancholia. "It's gonna be okay. Lemme hold you."

Natsu pulled Gray down to the pillow, and the ice wizard did not have the will or vitality to resist. Gray was utterly defeated by his own inner turmoil.

"We're gonna get through this," Natsu whispered, hugging Gray as he spooned around the ice wizard. "We'll do this together. You took care of me when I had that kidney infection. Now it's my turn to take care of you."

Gray sighed and let his pride melt in those arms. For once, he would let Natsu be the one to keep everything under control. "Thank you, Natsu."

"Not a problem. Now sleep. I'll still be here in the morning."

Gray finally closed his eyes, and that swirl of haunting words was now replaced with a promise. I'll still be here.

Chapter Text

"Hey, wake up."

Gray heard the words and felt shaking. He still felt exhausted, like he had been in a battle. As consciousness returned, he realized that the battle was with his own inner self.

Natsu stroked Gray's ebony hair back and kissed him on the forehead. "Are you feeling better now?"

"Too sleepy," he groaned. "How about you? Did you sleep okay?"

Natsu smiled placidly as he admitted, "I didn't sleep at all."

"Was I snoring?"

"No. I was up thinking."

"About what?"

A long pause passed before he confessed, "How jealous I am. So stupid."

Gray's eyes softened. "Natsu…"

"No, it really is stupid," he snapped in frustration. "I mean, all of us in the guild tease you about your past, how you used to pick up girls all the time. You were just a notch down for being as bad as Loke," he said with a tight laugh that betrayed painful emotions. "Mira used to say that when you two were partners, maybe Loke taught you some stuff, like how to pick up multiple girls at once. It never really bothered me back then. I'd laugh it off, tease you, call you a stripping pervert like everyone else. Now…" Natsu's brow wrinkled with tenseness. "Now I wonder … how many girls did you sleep with?" he cried out in exasperation.

Gray began to open his mouth.

"I don't want to know," Natsu shouted, swinging his hands out. "Still, it bugs me a little. You're that experienced and … and I'm not. Like I don't deserve you."

"Natsu, don't say that."

"It was just something I was thinking about. I mean, a virgin uke and a man-whore seme: it's so cliché, it's not even funny. And now … this." He gave a long, tired sigh. Staying up all night had taken its toll. "Does the test hurt? The one to see if I have this? Do I have to … to…?"

Natsu froze up, and his eyes went huge as some horror of the past surged in on him. He shivered hard in panic and began to hyperventilate.

Gray snapped out of his sleepiness and grabbed hold of the trembling shoulders. "Natsu!"

"I … don't … no … I can't." His eyes were massive and watering up. "I won't—"

"Calm down."

Terrified eyes turned straight at him. "Do I have to come into a cup?" he cried out with a level of horror Gray had not yet witnessed. "He won't take my cum, right?"

"No, it's not that sort of test. Calm down. They do a blood test and a swabbing. That's all."

"Blood test?" Natsu asked, looking cautious to believe him.

"Yes, they take some blood and swab your penis. It's not that painful, and it's over in a few seconds. Calm down." He held Natsu as the adrenaline shivered out. "I'll be there with you. You can even hold my hand."

"Shut up. Just … I thought I'd have to … to…"

"It's not that sort of test."

"Okay … okay…" He let out a long sigh as his shoulders loosened. "Oh God, I hate when I'm like this."

"I know. Come here. I'll hold you this time." Gray felt in control once again as he comforted Natsu in his arms. "It's an easy test," he crooned softly. "I will be in the room too. It'll be okay." He felt Natsu sink down in relaxation. "Are you better?"

"Yeah. Sorry. I just thought about it and … I … I freaked out. I hate this."

"I know," Gray said in understanding, stroking through his hair.

"Stop petting me," he sneered in annoyance.

"Sorry." The grumble made Gray smile. At least it meant Natsu was pulling himself out of the darkness. "Come on. Let's get breakfast. Then we'll go to the doctor."


It was evening, Natsu still had a bandage on his arm from the blood test earlier that morning. Now, he and Gray sat in the doctor's office. Here, hidden in this sterile room, they held hands. Both were shaking slightly. Natsu realized there was a good chance at being sick. The doctor had also swabbed his throat, since he had performed fellatio on Gray, and an anal exam since he was the bottom. They wanted to make sure the bacteria was not present anywhere.

Beside him, Gray stared straight ahead with worries plaguing him. If he made Natsu sick…

The doctor stepped in, jolting them both. "Mister Natsu Dragneel?"

"Y-yes," Natsu snapped like a child answering roll call.

"I have good news … and not so good news. The good news is, the tests were clear for both gonorrhea and trich. You don't have them."

Natsu let out a sighing laugh, and Gray hugged him with pride.

"The not-so-good news is you do test positive for human papillomavirus, or HPV."

Natsu tensed up all over again. "What the hell is that?"

"It's very common," he assured with a passive smile. "In fact, more than half of all sexually active adults have it at some point in their life. There's no cure, but it usually goes away on its own."

"Can I give that to Gray?" screamed Natsu. Now he understood how Gray had felt yesterday.

Gray spoke up, "I had the HPV vaccine as a kid. Everyone in the guild gets those vaccines. You should have as well."

Natsu's eyes dropped. "Unless I got sick before then."

Gray jolted as he realized what Natsu meant: that bad time in the past, the man who sexually abused him. Natsu still did not want to speak about everything that happened, and Gray did not push him to talk about it. Just thinking about someone sexually touching a mere child made Gray furious. Now this! Although Natsu never said precisely what happened during those weeks of torture, it was enough to have done this to him. Natsu already feared that he felt filthy and tainted because of that pervert, and now he was sick. That man had not only violated Natsu, he gave the Dragon Slayer a virus, and one that had no cure.

What sort of things had Natsu been forced to do with that man that might make him sick in this way? Thinking about it made Gray crackle in frosty rage. He realized, that must be the same anger and jealousy Natsu felt about his own days dating indiscriminately.

"What about Gray?" Natsu demanded. "He'll be okay, right?"

Gray was stunned Natsu could force himself out of that past so soon, and he realized it was only because Natsu was truly worried about him. That made Gray's cheeks warm up with happiness.

"I have a dose here of metronidazole for trich. I've also filled this bottle with the pills you must take for gonorrhea. It's vitally important that you take them on time and until you run out of pills. Gonorrhea can clear up, but only if you take the medication fully. In two weeks, we'll test you again and see if the treatment worked. If the bacteria is still present, we'll need a more rigorous approach. I don't think it'll come to that. It should clear up fine."

"Thank you." Gray immediately took the medication for trich. Might as well get that out of the way. "So, what about Natsu? There's … no cure." Gray had been bolstered by the doctor's assurance that his issues could be cared for with medication. Natsu did not even have that much to hang onto.

"HPV usually goes away on its own. It's so common, you shouldn't need to worry. I would hardly bother to tell you, except certain strains of HPV can lead to complications far in the future."

"Complications?" Gray shouted. He felt the same horrific dread he had known yesterday, like tiny needles flowing through his veins and twisting in his stomach. He looked over to Natsu, but those squinty eyes were fixed on the doctor, listening without resorting to screaming, taking in the medical professional's words with calm acceptance. He was surprised Natsu did not look and feel as worried as Gray did himself.

"You must realize, there are dozens of strains of the virus, and only a few can lead to clinical complications. Sadly, there's no way to test precisely which strain Mister Dragneel has. There is a small possibility of developing cancer later in life. You're young and vigorously healthy, so you should be fine, but after the age of forty, you'll want to make sure you're screened for anal and throat cancer once a year, just to be safe. There is also a strain that can cause genital warts, a completely different type than the cancer-causing strain. If you get anything like that, come back here and we can treat it. However, like I said, only a very small percentage have any problems, and your examination this morning showed nothing abnormal. Usually, HPV is silent, dormant, and as I said, most sexually active adults have it at some point. You can get it by simply kissing."

Gray gawked. "By just kissing? That easily?"

All the horrors he had been imagining faded. That pedophile bastard could have done nothing more than kiss Natsu and gave him this virus. Hearing that made Gray feel slightly better. Sitting beside him, Natsu still had the same expression, stern but blank, listening but non-responsive.

"Don't worry, really. It'll likely clear up on its own. Well, that's all," the doctor said. "I wish you both happiness, and I'll see Mister Fullbuster in two weeks for testing. Good afternoon, gentlemen." Then the doctor left.

Gray collapsed into Natsu's chest. "Oh, Natsu, I'm so relieved."

His eyes were still sternly forward. "I still have something," he said in a hollow tone.

"He said almost everyone gets it. I had the vaccine, so you can't give it to me. It's fine. It's … all fine." He crushed Natsu into a hug. "I was so worried. I didn't want to taint you and have you hate me."

Natsu finally relaxed out of his stiff posture. "I wouldn't have hated you even if I had caught something. Maybe I'm burning your infection out of me," he bragged lightly.

"Oh God, I hope so. I was—" Gray suddenly cracked. "I was so worried." He broke into tears.

Natsu hugged him. "I know, Gray."

"I was scared," he shouted. "About you, about getting you sick. Just thinking about it makes me wanna scream."

"I know," he soothed. As Natsu held Gray, he felt the shuddering in those shoulders. "Let it out here."

"I'm … not crying … in a doctor's office," he blubbered wetly.

"Better to cry here than out in the middle of the street, right? It's just us in this room."

As Natsu hugged him, Gray shrank. Again, he gave up control and let Natsu console him. "I … was scared," he squeaked out from his straining throat as he jolted with sobs he tried to hold in.

"I know," Natsu whispered comfortingly. "So was I. It's okay now. I'm okay. You're gonna be okay. We'll get you healed up."

Gray snuffled up his tears and shivered as he awkwardly laughed. "I can't have sex for two weeks."

"Well, I just can't get your cum on me, right?"

"Or put your mouth near my groin. It's skin-to-skin, so you really shouldn't touch me down there at all."

"We could do … other things … can't we?"

Gray looked up in confusion. "I dunno."

"We need to ask."

Gray leaped up and opened the door. "Doctor!"

"Yes, gentlemen?"

"We have a question." Gray looked out into the hall at the nurses and realized there were other patients around. "Can you come into the room?"

The doctor entered, and Gray shut the door. The doctor glanced around at the two young men.

"We wanna know," Gray blurted out. "Can we…? Oh God, this is embarrassing to ask. Can we still do … some stuff? If I'm careful, of course, and if I don't get anything on him?"

The doctor sighed as he maintained his professional comportment. "I would not recommend it, but I suppose if you wear a condom the whole time and the penis is not inserted anywhere, since even the preseminal fluid can contain the bacteria. It's best if Mister Dragneel does not come into contact with the skin around the genital area at all. Preferably, if Mister Fullbuster masturbated while Mister Dragneel watched without direct participation, or wearing a latex glove. That way, physical contact with the bacteria in that region is less likely."

Natsu asked, "What about other areas?"

Both the doctor and Gray looked over and asked together, "Other areas?"

"Yeah, like it's okay if I give him a normal back or foot massage, right? Just don't touch his cock."

"Or the anus," the doctor warned. "I would also recommend that you don't put your fingers in Mister Fullbuster's mouth. Contracting the bacteria that way is rare, but it can happen."

"But I can suck on his fingers, right?" Natsu asked. "He just can't suck on mine."

"Only if his hands are clean and have not been in contact with his genitals."

"What about his toes?"

The doctor raised an eyebrow. "Toes?"

"Toes?" Gray shouted in shock. What the hell was this flame-brain plotting?

"I can suck his toes, right? Or he could suck mine?"

Gray felt a jolt in his pants as he imagined what Natsu was talking about.

The doctor thought about it seriously. "To be honest, I don't think I've ever read of a case where gonorrhea was transmitted via the feet. The toes are too small to reach the pharynx. Assuming his foot was not in direct contact with his genitals—which would be quite a flexible move—then sucking on the toes should not pose a threat."

"Okay, so what about me?" Natsu asked. "I have that virus."

"A virus that over half of humans get," the doctor assured. "I've had it. My wife has had it. My eldest son tested positive for it before the vaccine came out. Often, HPV lives in the body undetected and perfectly harmless. Your pelvic examination this morning showed no outward signs. You are healthy and asymptomatic. Since your partner is vaccinated, it should be fine. However, I highly urge abstinence while Mister Fullbuster is undergoing treatment. The fact that Mister Dragneel is not infected despite being a sexual partner is, frankly, quite shocking. You're a lucky man, but don't push your luck."

Sternly, Gray decided, "I'm not going to let him get sick. But I can … touch him, right? I know he shouldn't touch me, but can I still touch him safely?"

"Make sure your hands are cleaned with antibacterial soap, no cuts or hang nails, and only your hands. Even if Mister Dragneel were to use a condom—"

Natsu suddenly flinched and gagged down a cry. Gray heard and turned to him. Condoms! That man in the past must have used things like condoms to help him collect sperm from Natsu.

"Natsu, calm down," he whispered.

The doctor stepped forward in professional concern. "Are you feeling ill?"

"It's fine," Gray snapped. "Sorry, doctor, but this is something that doesn't fall under your credentials. Give us a moment and we'll be gone. Thank you very much, truly."

"If you say so. Good day, gentlemen."

Once the doctor was gone, Gray fully hugged Natsu. "Are you okay?"

"Y-yeah," he whispered in a shudder. "Just … when he said that—"

"It's going to be fine. My poor dragon," he cooed softly, squeezing Natsu. "I'm right here. I'll take care of you."

Tossing his cares and well-being to Gray was like that time, with the collar and leash. "What do I do, kainushi?"

Gray heard the rare submissive pitch to Natsu's words. He was the dominant, so it was his responsibility. "You don't have to worry. Leave it to me."

"Do I have to come in a condom? Coming inside something … I … I can't … I can't do that."

"We obviously won't do that to you." He stroked the pink hair and held Natsu as his fears slowly dissipated. "I'll take care of you. I won't let you get sick, and I won't make you do anything that's scary, even if that means I can't come for two weeks."

Natsu looked up with a slight pout. "Wanna go back to your place?"

Gray wished he could take Natsu home and spend the whole night easing his fears, but he still had some responsibilities. "I need to go see Cana before it gets too late."

"Cana?"

"About … about me. About the infection."

"Why…? Oh." Natsu frowned and looked aside. "You and her?"

"A one-time thing, before the lady who I think gave me this, but it'd be unethical not to warn her anyway in case I caught this earlier. However, she'll complain. Whether if she's infected or not, she'll tell the whole guild. I can just imagine her shouting to everyone 'Gray's got gonorrhea.' Everyone will think I'm such a slut, I got what I deserved, and maybe they're right—"

"No, don't say that."

"I don't want anyone to think you also have this, or heaven forbid, if they think you were the one who gave it to me." He stroked Natsu's head gently. "I don't want anyone—not even yourself—to think you're filthy." Then he gave Natsu a kiss on the forehead. "I know we wanted to tell the guild about us, but I don't think this is the best moment to come out. When I'm better, we'll tell everyone. I really don't want to keep it secret anymore, but … this is going to be a really bad time for me. Let me deal with the repercussions on my own. I…" He looked away with a stern brow. "I need to do this much on my own. I need to take responsibility, and I don't want to drag you into my mess. Not for this."

Natsu looked down and nodded. He wanted to help Gray, but Natsu knew quite well that there are moments when a person had to fight their battle alone. "You can still stay at my house. I asked Happy, and he's fine with it."

"Thanks, but I heard him asking if I was pregnant. I don't want him to think I'm trying to infect you. Plus, quite honestly, I'd be too tempted." He put his hand on Natsu's head and bent to look into his lowered face. "I'm really sorry, but I need to stay away from you."

"What? Why? We can still do things," he argued, realizing he sounded whiny and desperate. "The doctor said so. At least you can touch me. You can still tie me up. That's safe. It'll just take a few adjustments, a few limitations. We can work with that."

"Natsu…" Gray shook his head sadly. "You're too much of a temptation, and I'm not a strong-willing man. If I give in just a little bit, I'll want all of you."

Natsu wanted to be sad hearing that, but Gray's reason for staying away made him a bit happy. Knowing the ice wizard was—what was the word he once used?—enthralled by him made Natsu feel smug. Gray was addicted to him.

It made him want Gray even more.

"We should free up this room," Gray realized. "I'm heading to the guild. You should go home. I know you too well, and if people start making fun of me, you'll get defensive and try to beat them all up."

"I wanna be there when they find out," Natsu said stubbornly. Gray opened his mouth to protest, but the Dragon Slayer had a gleam in his eyes. "I want to be the one to call you man-whore first. You teased me when everyone thought I got dumped by my girlfriend. Time for me to tease you back."

"Don't fight anyone," Gray warned. "Don't protect me."

"You're on your own, I get it," he assured. "When it's over, or when you can't take anymore ridicule, stay at my house. Not the whole time you're sick, but just tonight. It's been a hell of a day, and I need you there. You keep the nightmares away."

"Idiot, you didn't listen to a word I said."

"I did, but I'm saying I need you tonight. You can hide away in an ice cave after that, but … just for tonight. I want to hold you. Nothing kinky."

"Fine," Gray sighed, but he was glad to know Natsu wanted to stay beside him through this. He muttered petulantly, "Thank you."

"I'll go first," Natsu decided. "I need to talk to Happy to make sure he doesn't say anything about us. Come in a few minutes after me." Then Natsu jumped off the examination table and hurried out of the doctor's office.

Gray took a moment to brace himself … and find his shirt, which had once again gone missing. The best scenario was that Cana would take the news well and want to keep the whole thing a secret.

Of course, this was Fairy Tail. Best scenarios never happened here.


When Gray arrived at the guild hall, Cana was in the middle of a drinking contest with Bacchus as her opponent. The whole guild cheered, but Cana looked wasted already, while Bacchus was just a bit flushed. Gray had to stand to the sidelines and watch until Cana finally fell backwards with a drunken whoop as she passed out.

"I win," Bacchus declared. "I'm taking my prize." He hefted Cana up and slung her over his shoulder.

"Wait," Gray yelled. "I need to talk to Cana."

Bacchus grinned down at Gray. "You can see her in the morning, after I'm done with her."

"No!" Gray shouted, realizing with horror what Cana must have agreed to as a prize. "Look, I have to talk to Cana right now. It's really important."

Bacchus moaned and tossed the fully unconscious woman at Gray with almost no regard. "Fine, if you can wake her. I give ya until I finish the barrel she didn't drink." Bacchus flopped back onto the alcohol-covered table and took up Cana's barrel.

Gray hurried Cana to the medical room and got sniffing salts to wake her up. Then, although he doubted she fully understood anything, he told Cana the truth. He emphasized that he thought he caught it after the two of them had sex, but there was no way for him to know for sure. Purely to be safe, she should get tested. Cana listened without saying anything. She nodded, she agreed that she should get tested, and she thanked him for coming forward and being honest. Then she stood up, wobbling only slightly. Gray let her lean on him as they walked back out into the main hall.

Suddenly, Cana bellowed loud enough for half of Magnolia to hear: "Sorry, Bacchus. I can't fuck you tonight. Gray gave me gonorrhea."

That started a small riot. Gray had never felt so despised. People sneered at him. Some of the women scoffed that he got what he deserved, and they were glad they had not slept with him. Cana was practically gloating about their one night together, saying hurtful things like "He wasn't worth it; he didn't even last long enough." Lucy stomped up and slapped Gray across the cheek for being irresponsible. Erza held the blonde's hand back from doing anything more than that. The Titania pulled Gray aside, away from the harsh insults. However, her words hurt worse.

"You've put a lot of people in danger with your recklessness, Gray. I am very disappointed in you."

Ouch … like a sword through the heart!

Her next words were softer. "However, the fact that you got tested and even took responsibility by telling Cana shows you really are a mature person. For that, I'm proud of you. Have you told your other lovers?"

His eyes drifted, but he did not see pink hair anywhere in the crowd. "I've only told one other, but I'll try to find the rest tomorrow."

"That's good. What about your girlfriend?"

He flinched. Just yesterday, he had almost come right out and told Erza that the person he was interested in was not a girl at all, but their very own Salamander. Now, Gray felt a terrifyingly desperate need to protect Natsu's reputation by not dragging the guy down along with him.

"We just got back from the doctor. The results were negative, and I think we're not breaking up."

"I'm really glad she's not sick. She must really love you if she can forgive you. Hang on to that one."

Gray smiled with a small blush. "I definitely plan to."

Just then, someone shouted out, "We should put an article in the newspaper. Gray's probably slept with half the women in town."

"Not just this town," another person shouted. "Call up Sorcerer Weekly. How many cities has Gray screwed around in? How many wizards in other guilds?"

"Uh-oh! Warn Blue Pegasus!" someone laughed.

"I need to get out of here," Gray growled.

Erza told him one last thing. "Take a couple weeks off. If you have trouble paying your rent, just tell me. The team can take bonus missions to help you out. I'll talk to Lucy too. Hitting you like that was out of line. I don't know where Natsu went, though. He was here a minute ago, but he took off. Maybe he's planning on confronting you outside. Be careful around him. Don't get into a fight."

"I won't," he said, holding back a smile. At least no one had a clue Gray and Natsu were together. He wanted to protect Natsu as much as possible.

Gray had hoped to see Natsu waiting outside, but he was not there. He looked around the streets, but nothing. Natsu had said he wanted to hold Gray tonight, but then he vanished. Gray wanted the Dragon Slayer's warm embrace right now, but he also felt like just being alone to wallow in self-hatred. He had no clue which home to head to: Natsu's or his own.

His need for Natsu must have been greater than he imagined, because he found his steps taking him out of town and along the path to the little hut in the woods. When he came near, he heard shouting from inside.

"Happy, really, it's okay."

"It's not okay," the squeaky voice of the Exceed protested angrily. "Gray is with Cana."

"He's not with Cana."

"But he gave her a sex disease."

"It wasn't like that, Happy. Gray caught that from someone else."

"And then he gave it to Cana. They slept together. Natsu, I know what an STD is. I'm not stupid. I don't want you to get sick. Besides, Gray sleeps around. He's gonna hurt you."

"He … he won't."

To Gray's surprise, Natsu did not sound fully convinced. Did he really worry about Gray's fidelity?

"He's just barely less bad than Loke," Happy argued.

"Loke is loyal to Lucy."

"I saw him kissing another girl last week. He's not loyal. Gray won't be either."

Gray felt like bursting in there and defending himself, but Natsu shouted quicker.

"Gray might have slept around in the past, but that doesn't mean he cheats on anyone he really loves."

"You don't know if he loves you. Have you told him how you feel?"

"I … that is … y-yeah, I told him."

"Did Gray say he also loves you?"

"He … well … no, but he said he … he … cares for me."

"Natsu, that's not love."

"It could be, if the caring is strong enough."

"If you tell him you love him, and he only says he cares for you, then he doesn't love you. Please, Natsu, I don't want to see your heart get broken."

"He doesn't have to say it to feel it."

"Yes, he does. How else could you know?"

Gray listened, but he heard nothing, no retort, no defensive explanation. He realized, Natsu obviously did not want to get into all Gray had done to show his feelings.

"Natsu, he doesn't love you—"

Gray had heard enough. He burst into the house and glared at the two of them. "I do!" he shouted. "About what you're talking about: I feel that way."

Happy blinked in surprise. "Do you really love Natsu?"

Gray looked at the equally stunned Dragon Slayer and whispered, "Yes." He gulped hard. Even just answering a question like that was terrifying. He half expected a monster to crash through the house and suddenly crush Natsu under its massive foot.

Happy now looked angry. "Then why did you sleep with other girls?"

"That happened before I fell … fell in … before I began to feel this way." He cursed himself silently for not being able to say the words. "I'm sorry, Natsu. For not being able to tell you properly … I'm sorry." Gray gulped hard and fisted up his hands stubbornly. "I like you … and I need you. I care for you … and I want to tell you the other, but it still terrifies me. The more I feel that way, the more it scares me, because I feel more and more that I can't lose you."

"I understand," Natsu assured him.

"I don't want you to get sick, so I won't do anything. Happy, please, don't tell anyone about us until I finish my treatment. I want to tell the guild. I want to tell everyone. But not while I'm sick. I don't want to shame Natsu. Just being around a man like me is shameful—"

Natsu bolted forward and hugged Gray. "Don't say that."

Gray looked over to Happy, worried how the Exceed might respond to a hug like this, physical proof that he and Natsu were more than just teammates and rivals. Happy politely looked away, picking something in his nails. He was giving them a moment together, and Gray realized just how good of a friend Happy was.

Natsu sighed as he embraced Gray. "I'm not ashamed to be in love with you. I left the guild because Happy flew off in anger, not because I was mad at you. He knows I have feelings for you, and he thought you betrayed me. He was just a little angry."

"I can understand that," Gray muttered, remembering how last night, it was Natsu in a fury as he thought Gray must have cheated on him. "That's why I don't want anyone to know yet."

"I get it," Natsu muttered sadly. "This'll be hard enough on you. I don't want to make it worse. And wow, Lucy left a huge hand print on your cheek. She slaps hard!"

"Yeah, and if she or Erza thought I'd try to seduce you while I have this infection…"

"Ooh," Natsu realized, trembling a little, and even Happy shivered at the thought of Erza's wrath. "Yeah, that would be bad. Then we'll keep this secret a little longer." Natsu looked back to his cat. "Is that okay, Happy?"

"Aye, sir. Erza can get really scary."

Gray pouted and muttered, "I'm just glad she wasn't the one who slapped me. I'd still be unconscious."

"Stay here," Natsu insisted. "At least for tonight. You still haven't eaten dinner."

"Aye," said Happy. "I bought you juice, and I did extra fishing today because Natsu said you were going to stay, and fish is really good when you're sick."

"Fine, fine," Gray laughed, giving up any attempts to protest this. Then he sighed with happiness he did not want to fully show, because if he did, he just might cry. All he could say was, "Thanks, you two."

Happy grinned brightly. "I'm just glad you're not pregnant."

Gray blushed awkwardly. "Uh … yeah. Me too."

"If you and Natsu had kids, they'd look really funny. I also think Magnolia wouldn't last long. But you'd make a really good mommy, Gray."

Natsu fled to the kitchen, holding his stomach with peals of laughter at just how red Gray's face got.

Chapter Text

Gray woke up to hot fingers tickling the skin of his cheek with slow caresses. When he drowsily opened his eyes, he saw the pink-haired Dragon Slayer sitting beside him in bed, gazing down with unusual intensity.

"Hey," he yawned. "I told you to stay away while I'm sick."

"You got this in the mail." Natsu held up a letter.

Gray squinted through the morning light. "You opened my mail? That's against the law, you know."

"The last blood tests came back clear."

Gray stared at him in a daze, and then he sighed deeply. "Is that so? Then it's over." He felt a deep burden suddenly fall from his shoulders. "Two weeks without sex. I honestly didn't think I could last that long."

"I need you, Gray." Urgency and lust burned in his voice. "And I think you need me."

Gray smiled up at his insatiable boyfriend. "Desperately."

Natsu did not wait. He slammed his lips against Gray's and thrust his tongue in, craving that wintry taste once again. Gray felt hands pulling at his clothes. Obviously, Natsu did not want to wait even until Gray could brush his teeth. He chuckled at the eagerness and gave in, stripping his clothes off and pulling away Natsu's as well.

He had almost forgotten those taut muscles and the heat of Natsu's touches. Now, the Dragon Slayer was wildly voracious, nipping down Gray's neck, biting his collarbone, and lathing his tongue around Gray's nipples. Gray laid back, savoring every touch and lick. He never realized just how touch-deprived he had become.

"Gray," Natsu breathed through heavy panting. Suddenly, he grabbed Gray's arousal and pumped it firmly while gazing heatedly into those stormy blue eyes. "I need you."

"Roll over…"

"No!" Natsu looked aside, debating something. His face looked both worried and determined, so Gray kept quiet to see what was wrong. "Something Happy said made me think of a way I can … I can make love to you."

Gray shivered at the thought. "To … to me? You on top?"

Natsu nodded, blushing slightly. He leaned over Gray and stared down close, searching those droopy eyes. "I want to make you pregnant."

Gray gawked, utterly flabbergasted. A laugh suddenly burst out. "Whaaat? But Natsu, a guy can't…"

"I know!" he interrupted. "It's all mental. It's how I need to think about it. I want to give you my cum so we can have a child together. That puts it in my control. You're not taking my cum; I'm giving it to you. That man … he wanted my semen to breed a Dragon Slayer. It was out of my control. This isn't breeding, though. It's just us, and I love you. I love you enough to want to raise kids with you."

Gray's mouth dropped. Natsu loved him that much? Tears of joy began to burn in Gray's eyes. He had no clue what he could say to that.

"So I'm going to give you my seed. I know it's ridiculous, but let me just think it that way."

Gray realized this was no different from when Natsu had to pretend he was getting raped. It was just a band-aid to help him get over phobias. "Fine," he agreed, and Gray chuckled softly. "Let's make babies."

Natsu at least knew the basics. He had entered Gray once before. At that time, he had freaked out. He was still on bottom with Gray riding on top. That had been the biggest mistake. It made Natsu not in charge, handcuffed and forced. This time, Gray laid on the mattress, gazing up as Natsu prepped him. Natsu was fully in control. Gray surrendered everything to him. He watched, keeping silent in fear of triggering something, only moaning as those hot fingers pressed in and widened him slowly.

"I still can't use a condom," Natsu warned.

"That defeats the purpose of making babies, right?" Gray reasoned.

It took a moment, but Natsu grinned. "Right!" He gazed down to his own eager erection, and then up to Gray's flushed face. "Are you ready?"

"I have been for a long time," he moaned.

Gray watched as Natsu drizzled lube all over him. Then the Dragon Slayer focused down, holding himself as he guided it in. Gray felt the pressing thickness, pain as it tried to pry him open, and a slight tearing. He forced himself to relax despite the pain.

"Ugh … arrrrgh … N-Natsu! Oh God, you're huge."

"Sorry," he whispered, focused now. "Just relax. It'll go in easier."

Suddenly, it was inside. Natsu waited, and Gray panted as the pain eased away.

"Okay." He nodded, slowing his breathing. "I'm okay."

"Can I move?"

Gray reached up and held Natsu's face with an endearing smile. "Make love to me, Natsu."

Finally … finally, Natsu was inside him. He felt the slow thrusts, gentle and cautious at first, tenderly making sure this would not hurt. Then Gray felt Natsu gaining confidence, and with it came speed. As Gray loosened and grabbed Natsu's hips to pull him in tighter, the Dragon Slayer's wild side emerged more and more.

"I'm gonna ram you into the bed," Natsu growled.

"Hell, yes!" Gray moaned loudly.

Each thrust felt like it might undo him. Natsu suddenly clawed down Gray's chest, scratching deep welts, and making Gray's spine arch in painful bliss.

"You're my mate, Gray," he huffed with puffs of steam. "Now. Always."

Gray could only hold on as Natsu pounded into his ass. The bed creaked in a squeaking rhythm. The air reeked of sweat and the scent of lubricant. Too quickly, Gray felt he was about to come.

"N-Natsu!" he warned.

"Almost…" Natsu gasped suddenly with wide-eyed shock. "G-Gray!" He looked like he was about to panic right at the critical moment.

Gray grabbed Natsu's flushed and sweaty cheeks and force him to look down into those steel-blue eyes. "Do you want a family with me, Natsu?"

The Dragon Slayer looked stunned, as if Gray had just proposed to him. Gray realized, in some roundabout way, he had. Natsu laughed happily. "Yeah. I do. With you." He leaned over and kissed Gray's lips. "Always with you."

It was an oath and a hope.

Natsu suddenly tensed up and gulped hard. His brow crinkled as he felt the impending release, and his fingers held so tightly into Gray's arms, he was leaving behind bruises. Gray grabbed his own shaft and pumped himself, bringing himself to climax quickly.

"Natsu! Nnngh!" Gray groaned as he splattered over his hand and chest.

"Aah. Aaaaaaah!" Natsu screamed, both terrified and allowing all of his fears now to rest upon his love for Gray.

Gray felt Natsu still inside, the shaft pulsed, and burning pressure filled him. He groaned Natsu's name, keeping him in the moment. He repeated that name, not letting Natsu have a chance to slip into some nightmare.

"Natsu … Natsu … Natsu…"

"I … I did it," he finally said, laughing wearily at the victory over the darkness. "I was able to fully make love to you. Hah!" he laughed, shocked and tired. "I did it."

"I knew you could," Gray said with full confidence. "I…"

Gray's throat clenched, cutting off the words. However, he realized that since Natsu could defeat his demons, he needed to as well. He had to let Natsu be the one to shoulder his fear this time.

"Natsu," he said seriously. Gray gulped hard, and suddenly he blurted out, "I love you."

Natsu's eyes widened. He froze for a moment, stunned by the words. "You … what…? Say that again," he said with tears of joy in his eyes.

It felt easier the second time. "I love you."

"Gray," he wept. Natsu laughed and hugged him, squishing cum between their chests, but neither one cared. Then he raised up, a beaming grin gleaming in the low bedroom light. "Once more. Say it!"

"Idiot. Why say it three times?"

"Because I wanna hear it."

Gray sighed, but he smiled up at his boyfriend. "I lov-…"

Gray heard a deafening bang. As if in slow motion, he saw something enter the side of Natsu's skull and blast out the other side. Blood and brains splashed over the bed. Natsu's empty eyes still stared down at Gray, the light in them snuffed right in the moment of happiness.

"No!" Gray cried out in horror.

A second later, Natsu collapsed heavily down on top of him. Gray scrambled, pushing Natsu off and rolling him over. Half of his head was blasted apart.

Blood.

Blood everywhere.

Those green eyes gazed up blankly.

"Oh God, no!" Gray screamed. "Natsu? Natsu!" He grabbed the peach-soft cheeks, but they were already getting cold. The fire was gone. Only the cold remained. "Noooooo!"


Gray jolted up in bed screaming. Not only had his wet dream ruined his sheets, but now he was shaking in terror. That old fear had reared up, bringing with it terrifying memories.

Everyone to whom he had ever said 'I love you' had died. Natsu would be no exception.

Death.

Blood.

Horrific scenes flashed through his head. His mother's dying screams. His teacher's crushed body. His school friends littered across the snowy blood-soaked streets of his destroyed town. Ur cracking apart into ice.

Death everywhere.

And now that scene. Natsu dead, killed brutally, all because he had said those words.

It was not the first time he had a nightmare about Natsu dying just after confessing his love. After his pseudo-confession the day Natsu's blood test results came back negative, Gray had feared that just saying that much—merely answering 'Yes' to Happy's question of 'Do you love him?'—was enough to damn Natsu to a horrific death … just like how everyone else to whom he had said 'I love you' eventually died.

Gray sat up in bed and curled around his knees, hugging them, panting and crying as the dream faded.

"I can't tell him," he sobbed. "Dammit, I can't risk it. I … I can't lose him."

That was something Gray would never risk. Even if he could not say it out loud, he knew in his heart, he had fallen in love with Natsu so deeply, he could not risk losing him.

Even if it meant never being able to tell him how he really felt.


After the news of his illness came out in such a horrible way, Gray stayed away from the guild for a few days. Nobody blamed him. After the shock of the news settled down and Cana came back from the doctor with a clean bill of health, people began to regret how they had teased Gray during what was likely a horrific time for him. Makarov, who had been away at a council meeting, heard about it upon his return and scolded them all harshly. Heads dropped, people felt awful that they had treated their own guildmate in such a deplorable way. Makarov especially scolded Cana for her utter lack of discretion.

Some people wanted to make it up to the ice wizard, but no one knew how. They only knew one thing…

Keep Juvia away from him!

The rain woman had been at home the day of the announcement, but when she found out about it the next morning, all hell broke lose. She attacked anyone who laughed about Gray's sickness. She violently defended him. However, she fluctuated between bawling for her poor, sick Gray-sama and nearly drowning the guild in tears, and then suddenly she would begin raging that some love rival had done such a horrible thing to her precious Gray-sama, and her killer aura appeared to be aimed at any female in the entire town. She brooded with thoughts of hunting this woman down, torturing her with water, making her suffer for infecting her precious Gray-sama, before drowning the cunt slowly. Her foul mood made a hailstorm pelt Magnolia for three days.

With Gray keeping to himself in his house and not accepting visitors, the team decided to do something for him. Erza took Lucy, Natsu, Wendy, Happy, and Carla on a mission aimed to help Gray out financially while he went through treatment. Lucy especially wanted to pick something with a high reward, since she felt awful now for slapping Gray.

"Although he deserved it," she retorted. "He used women."

Happy pointed out, "Loke used to do the same, and you've forgiven him."

"Sometimes I forgive him," she grumbled. "Sometimes that playboy is a total jerk."

Natsu had a feeling that Lucy and Loke's relationship must be tenuous, especially if Happy was right and Loke still flirted around with other women.

Did Gray still flirt? It was something Natsu worried about from time to time. Gray assured him he was exclusive, but how far did that actually go? Did he count flirting as cheating? It could not be an easy habit to break, just like Loke could hardly help but compliment every woman he saw. Plus Gray was popular with girls, especially since he went around shirtless most of the time.

When they returned from their mission, Gray was back in the guild and talking with Cana … shirtless once again. Natsu felt an instant leap of anger. Why would Gray be talking to that drunken lush after she publicly humiliated him? The fact that Gray and Cana had a history together did not help Natsu's burning jealousy. Natsu could not stop himself from wondering how those two looked with their lips locked together in a sensual embrace. Hell, Gray and Cana made a cute couple, both half naked like that, and it infuriated Natsu.

Lucy complained, "Natsu, you feel like you're about to set my clothes on fire. Cool down a bit."

No one in this guild would think he and Gray looked cute together. When finally they were free to tell everyone, there would be no smitten sighs of, "Aww, they're so adorable, I just knew they would hook up some day." No, Natsu already knew it would not go like that.

Yet he had heard people whisper about cute couples: Gray and Lucy, Gray and Juvia, Gray and Cana, Gray and Mira, even Gray and Erza, as terrifying as that sounded to Natsu's mind. He even heard a few girls giggling about Gray and Loke when those two partnered together for the S-Class trial.

Where were the whispered rumors about Gray and Natsu? Why did people not even consider them to be a couple? Just because they fought all the time, didn't that make it more obvious? It pissed Natsu off!

"Oi, popsicle-pants!" he called out. "Are you sure you should be propositioning girls already?"

Erza hit Natsu on the back of the head. "Be nice," she warned. Then she walked up to Gray just as Cana was finishing her beer. "Have you and Cana worked things out?"

Cana rolled her eyes. "I said sorry. I even bought him a drink. I'm just glad he didn't get me sick, or I'd have him pay for my treatment and any time off work."

Gray glared at her. "You should be glad I bothered to tell you at all. You probably needed to be tested." Obviously, whatever they worked out was done without fully patching things up between them.

Erza handed Gray a pouch of Jewels. "This should cover your rent this month. Consider it a get-well gift from the team. How are you feeling?"

"That's the problem," he grumbled. "I never felt bad to begin with. I can't say if I'm getting better or not."

"Sometimes, illness is like that. Continue resting," the redhead ordered. "Perhaps you could go on a trip somewhere, relax, have a vacation."

Gray's eyes drifted to Natsu, who was ordering some fire chicken and laughing like normal. "I don't think a trip would be a good idea," Gray muttered.

Before all this happened, the two of them had been planning a vacation, an outing away from everyone, where they could be together and act like a real couple. Now, Gray did not trust himself to be alone with Natsu. He missed those hot touches, and he craved the Dragon Slayer's burning body. Sleeping alone was painful. His dreams fluctuated between erotic and horrifying … or like today's dream, both passion and terror mixed. He did not have nightmares when he and Natsu lived together. He missed warming his cold toes on that burning body. The total silence at night, no soft snores beside him, was unnerving. He even missed waking up and feeling sweaty from having Natsu clinging to him all night, or having the Dragon Slayer stealing all the covers and cocooning himself in blankets.

He had not even seen Natsu since spending the night with him and Happy. He figured staying away was best, and now he knew that just might be the case. Seeing Natsu again made Gray crave him and realize just how much he really wanted the Dragon Slayer to claw him and claim him. The first half of his dream came to mind. He could almost feel the thrust of that burning body…

Just then, Natsu whined loudly to Mira. "We're all out? No way! I know we have some."

"I'm too busy to go search for it," Mira apologized. The noon crowd was beginning to fill the room.

"Can I go check? I know we have a whole jar full in the back."

"If you can find it, you can eat it."

As Gray watched, Natsu gave him a brief look. It was sharp, silent, but demanding. Gray caught his breath. He had seen Natsu give him those eyes before, whenever he wanted to demand Gray to do something to him. They were eyes like in his dream, eyes of a Dragon Slayer taking control. This time, Natsu looked sharply at Gray, and then his eyes pointed to the back hallway.

What the hell was that idiot thinking?

Still, that look made Gray's heart race. He needed Natsu more than he liked to admit.

Erza drifted off to talk with Makarov, so Gray slipped off his chair. Nonchalantly, he drifted off to the hall leading to the back storage rooms where Mira kept her food supplies. He saw one of the doors left partly open, although the light was not on inside. Cautiously, Gray entered that room. It was dark, and the lamp in the hallway made the shelves of food appear like shadowy prison bars ready to cage him in.

"Natsu?" he whispered, taking a few steps in.

The door suddenly slammed shut. Gray jolted around, only to feel hot arms and a burning mouth on him. He recognized the taste instantly. He tried to talk, but Natsu gave him no opportunity. He thrust Gray up against a cabinet. The shelves dug into Gray's back, and he heard glass clanking together from the force of Natsu's roughness. Still, he hardly cared. He grabbed Natsu by the belt loops and yanked him closer. Their tongues clashed, and Natsu rolled his hips against Gray, showing him how turned on he was.

The dream flashed through his mind. Wild kisses. Natsu thrusting against him. Wanton moans.

Finally, Gray managed to free his lips just long enough to say, "Not here!"

Natsu rammed his tongue in, silencing him. He grabbed Gray's hand and slammed it against his own crotch. Gray grunted as he felt the contours of Natsu's erection. He grasped hold of it, and the Dragon Slayer's low moan was enough to make himself spring up with aching need.

"Natsu, I can't!" he hissed. "Not in public, and not while I'm sick."

Natsu pulled back with swollen lips dripping with saliva. "I won't touch you, but I desperately need you to touch me." Then he yanked his scarf aside. "Suck my neck, Gray. Mark me. I need it. I need you to make me yours again."

Gray realized the emotional roller coaster that week must have taken its toll on Natsu. Being away on the mission had made him desperate. They had not even kissed in days, let alone touched one another like this. In fact, the chastity belt incident was the last time they caressed one another intimately.

Gray kissed down Natsu's neck, nipping all the way down, until he reached where the neck and shoulder met. He bit Natsu there and suctioned the skin, while Natsu quivered in his arms, knees weakening, body burning with passion. Natsu covered his mouth to hold back the moans.

"Touch me, Gray," he begged quietly.

Gray let go and saw the purplish-red mark left on Natsu's neck. "I said I don't want to do this stuff here. Not in the guild."

"I know," he whimpered, "but I need it now. Not to fulfillment," he panted, "but right up to the point where I need to come, and then stop. Keep me edged right there."

That sort of erotic request made Gray shudder. "Oh God, Natsu." Despite Gray's aversion to being kinky in public, he craved the Dragon Slayer more than his own rationality allowed. He yanked Natsu's belt loose, slid his hand down the trousers, slipped under the elastic of his boxers, until at last he felt that hot member. "You're so hard already," he groaned. He stroked Natsu inside his pants, feeling the foreskin flex and fold within his fingers. "You know I don't like this."

"I know." Natsu bit his lip to hold back the pleasure.

"I said at the very beginning, I don't like doing kinky stuff where we can get caught. I specifically said I definitely would not do this in the guild."

"I … I know," Natsu whined quietly. "But … I need it, Gray. Right now." He was so desperate, he hardly cared if someone walked in.

"I'll give you what you need," Gray sneered sadistically, "but I'm going to punish you later."

Natsu gasped with a masochistic smile. "How?"

"I don't know yet," Gray teased, rubbing him more. "For breaking one of my rules, I'm going punish you hard."

"Nnngh … yeeeah."

"I'm going to spank you," he threatened, and Natsu moaned, thrusting into his hand. "I might even bring out that riding crop."

"Yes," Natsu groaned. "I liked that."

Gray loved to see the look in Natsu's face, getting lost in his cold touches, melting as fire and ice collided. "You know," he whispered right into Natsu's ear, "I have other stuff too."

Natsu's eyes widened with fear mixed with desire. "Oth- … other stuff?"

"While you were gone on that mission, I bought something."

Gray's piercing gaze made Natsu shudder, and the threat in those words had the Dragon Slayer salivating until he had to gulp hard before he could speak. "Wh-what did you get?"

Gray savored the anticipation in those squinty eyes. "A paddle, so I can really spank you hard."

Natsu grasped Gray's shoulders, burying his face into his chest, and the ice wizard saw that he needed to slow down rubbing him. Natsu was ready to lose it just by the power of his kinky imagination.

Growling hungrily, Natsu asked, "What type of paddle? Describe it."

His enthusiasm amused Gray. "Solid black rubber, rather heavy, got a good swing to it. It's flat on one side, but the other side has little steel studs on it. Thirty of them. Those metal bumps are going to make your ass sore."

"Yesssss," Natsu hissed. The thought of being hit again and again with a hard paddle made him double over. "Gray, stop already. S-Stop, stop."

Gray pulled his hand out. There was slickness on it, wet between his fingers. He was about to lick them, but then he remembered. He was sick. The infection was usually in the genitals, but it could also be in his deep mouth area. If he sucked his fingers, he could put bacteria on his hands. Instead, he wiped the hand on a dusting rag left on a shelf. Then he dropped the rag to the floor so no one would reuse it for anything important.

Natsu leaned back against the shelf, shuddering as he struggled to regain control. His body screamed for release, but he did not want that. Not yet. It hurt, and that ache felt amazing.

"Are you okay?" Gray asked in worry.

"Yeah," Natsu said through heavy breaths. "God, that sounds hot."

Gray knew this was wrong. He needed to keep away from Natsu for the Dragon Slayer's own safety. However, his lust outweighed his logic. Snarling with desperation, he asked, "Do you want to head back to my place?"

"Hell yes," Natsu huffed. Slowly, he gazed up in salacious desire. He needed Gray … so badly. He hardly cared for his own safety. He craved the ice wizard so much. He gave Gray a kiss on the collar bone, nipping him slightly. "Will you do that? You'll … spank me?"

"Hard," Gray growled, and he watched Natsu flinch as he tried to keep in control. "Breaking my rules, making me do this in public … you're in big trouble." He smirked. "As soon as we get home, I'm really gonna punish you."

He heard a low, reptilian growl in Natsu's chest, and those narrow eyes gleamed up at him in the low light. "You'll have to catch me first."

Natsu suddenly took off in a run, flinging the storage room door open and racing out. Gray laughed. A little cat-and-mouse chase just turned him on even more. He took off after Natsu, chasing him through the halls, into the main dining area, leaping over tables as Natsu ran off.

"Get back here, you flame-brain," he shouted as he swerved between guild members and out the main doors.

Mira tittered softly from her place behind the bar. "Well, it's nice to see Gray feeling better."

Erza nodded in agreement. "It's odd how it's always Natsu who can cheer up Gray."

"Odd, you say?" Mira mused with a devious gleam in her eye. "You're still fantasizing about those two hooking up, aren't you?"

Erza shrugged. "It could happen. I'd never talk about it with Natsu in hearing range, of course."

Lucy choked on her fruit drink. "Wait, Natsu and … and Gray? You mean like…" Her cheeks began to turn pink.

Erza looked over in surprise. "Have you never thought about it?"

Lucy tucked her head down. "Maybe a little." She felt ashamed for admitting she liked the idea of seeing her two male teammates in some yaoi tryst. It would definitely spark some ideas for her novel.

Mira pressed a finger to her lip and mused aloud, "I wonder who would top."

"Natsu," Lucy answered instantly. "He's way too aggressive to bottom."

"Gray," Cana said, as if not even needing to wonder about it. "You don't know how Gray can be in the bedroom. He tops … hard!"

"They'd switch," Erza wagered. "Natsu would never be submissive, but I can't imagine Gray accepting Natsu as a dominant partner, so I think they'd take turns."

Mira blushed. "Oh my! Erza really put thought into this."

Happy sat to the side nibbling his fish, and for once the little Exceed said nothing. He just smiled as he realized that when Natsu and Gray were ready to come out into the open, at least some in the guild would support them.

Chapter Text

They ran into Gray's apartment and straight to the bedroom. Gray made sure the curtains were closed firmly. He stripped to his boxers instantly while Natsu struggled out of his clothes. Gray hated waiting for Natsu's slower undressing, but he loved to watch the eagerness as the boy pulled clumsily on his clothes. Then finally, his boxers went down, and Gray saw just how aroused Natsu already was, erect and curved up to his belly. The race from the guild to Gray's home had been rife with sexual tension. Now, finally, they were alone and in privacy.

At last, Natsu was fully nude. Gray stood by the window curtains, and Natsu was on the other side of the room. They stared at each other from across the bed, both breathing hard already from their race and with anticipation of what was to come.

"So," Natsu said with a cocky smile. "What's first?"

"I want to do something … different," Gray suggested hesitantly. "Something we haven't tried yet, and I'm not sure how you'll like it."

Natsu waited, curious and a little worried. What could Gray possibly mean? The ice wizard walked over to his chest and unlocked it. He had to dig down a little—it wasn't something he had planned to use yet—but finally he brought up a box.

"I want you to look at it first." He slowly opened the box and took out a bulbous silicone toy. Natsu took it into his hands and turned the spade-shaped item around. He looked confused, so Gray explained. "It's a butt plug," he whispered, eying Natsu's reactions closely.

"T-that's what they look like?" Natsu said softly, handling it a little more hesitantly. "Kinda shaped weird."

"It's shaped like this to stay in place."

"Is it yours?"

"I bought it just for you. It has a vibrator, so it'll feel really good." Gray saw that Natsu was beginning to lose his erection. "I know you have an issue with toys, but … I can't do this to you yet." He took the plug and drizzled lube on it. "So you'll have to imagine this is me."

He pushed Natsu to lean over on the bed, his feet spread on the floor, and his ass sticking out. Gray leaned slightly over him, kissing his back and rubbing out his shoulders. He brought the plug over to Natsu's ass and glided it over his crack. Natsu gasped softly.

"Imagine this is my cock." Gray leaned in closer and moaned a whisper into the flushed ear. "I want inside you, Natsu."

The Dragon Slayer shuddered at the words.

"I want to watch you, wanna see you enjoying this." He lightly licked Natsu's ear and groaned quietly, "I want to pleasure you." Natsu went hard again, and his fingers clenched the bedsheets. Gray pressed the pointed tip of the plug up against Natsu's hole. "I want you to enjoy the gifts I get for you. I want to see you trembling with pleasure."

"Gray," he whispered, and his hips pressed out a little more.

Gray smiled at the acceptance. "I'll go slow. Tell me when it's too much."

He pressed, and the narrow tip slid in. Natsu hummed with pleasure. "It's small."

"It starts small. It'll get wider. Tell me when to stop."

Gray pressed more, and Natsu felt how that narrow tip flared quickly. He could feel the gradual opening of his insides, not a sudden ramming in, but slow stretching. When he hissed in pain, Gray was able to slide it to a narrower part, drizzled more lube, and then pressed in more, widening Natsu's ass.

"Ah! Wait, wait." Natsu breathed through the pain. This was even wider than Gray's own cock, and he was not used to being this spread.

"Are you all right?"

"Yes, just gotta relax." He let his head fall and breathed slowly, loosening up. "Okay, I'm good."

"Just a little more." Gray pressed harder as the bulbous end spread Natsu wider than he had ever gone before.

"Arrrrgh!"

"Are you okay?"

"More!" Natsu shouted, clenching the blankets with his fists. He felt the plug widen even greater, and he bit his lip in erotic pain. "Ffffffuck!"

"Nat-…"

"Shut up! Gimme more!"

Gray shuddered at hearing such a masochistic demand. "Okay, it's going to be really wide here, but it'll suddenly narrow. It'll fit in, and you'll wrap right around the bulb." He rubbed out Natsu's lower back and then pressed the plug harder. Natsu shrieked out a curse. "Natsu?"

"Keep going!"

Gray sneered as he rammed the last of it in. Suddenly, the plug was inside, and the muscles clenched around the narrow divot. The sudden lack of stretching brought a jolt of relief through Natsu's body, and he gasped as he felt his ass swallow up that huge plug.

"Are you okay?" Gray instantly asked, looking around to Natsu's face.

"Y-yeah! Whooooa … I … I feel it in there, but it doesn't hurt now. It … shrank down."

"It's so you feel it inside without spreading so wide that you hurt. Do you feel it?"

"Yeah."

"Is it good?"

"Hell yeah!"

Gray rested his head down on Natsu's back. He was stiff, remembering that heat and how amazing it felt to plunge in; however, he could not let his groin come into contact with that hot flesh. He pressed his boxers up against Natsu's thigh instead, feeling the heat radiating off of him and through the cloth barrier. He looked at the wide grip that was up against Natsu's butt, all that was sticking out from the plug. His fingers wrapped around that grip, and he gave the plug a twist. Natsu's whole body arched up as his mouth opened with a wanton moan.

"God, you are so sexy! What if I move it in and out just a little?"

He pressed the plug to be firmer inside, and then pulled on it, making the anus tug as the bulbous head put pressure there. Natsu jerked away with a shout.

"No. Hold on. Still … getting used … to it," he panted.

"Sorry," Gray smirked, enjoying how beads of sweat already glistened on Natsu's skin. "You are so … amazing," Gray praised, but emotions began to well up inside him. He felt his eyes burning and blinked hard. He whispered in anguish, "I don't want to lose you."

Natsu looked back around his shoulder. "Gray?"

"Thank you for staying by me through this."

"Of course I will," Natsu said loyally, yet his brow tensed up. His eyes dropped, and he stared ahead, filled with private troubles. "Gray…" However, his voice faded, and he could not speak.

"What is it?"

Natsu thought about what he had to say, but this was a really bad time. He did not want to ruin the moment. "Nothing. I think I'm relaxed now. More."

Gray could see he looked troubled. Had he said anything bad? Natsu seemed okay for the moment, so Gray decided to forget about it for now. He really wanted that ass sticking out.

"Are you ready for the paddle?"

Natsu shivered, but he nodded. "I think so."

Gray went to his chest of goodies and dug out the rubber paddle covered in metallic studs, slipping it out of a protective velvet bag. He turned around slowly and saw Natsu staring fixedly at him, mostly at the black rubber instrument of pain. The Dragon Slayer's tongue swiped out just a little and licked his parched lips. Then he gulped hard as he gazed at it. Gray smirked at the lust burning in those pointed eyes. He slapped the paddle into the palm of his hand, just enough to get a light crack. That was enough to make the veins in Natsu's neck press out for a second as his body tensed up with anticipation.

Gray slowly strode back to the bed, tapping the paddle into his other hand with each step, seeing how Natsu's eyes never left him, and the quickening heaves of his chest as Natsu breathed fast enough to keep up with his racing heart. The paddle was not pure rubber. The handle was wrapped in black leather with a leather strap dangling to wrap around Gray's wrist or so he could hang the paddle up on a wall. One side of the paddle had metallic lumps, like rivets drilled into the paddle. Those lumps would dig into the flesh, bruising harder than a flat surface. The lady at the sex shop had warned Gray that this particular item was a best-seller because it was so intense, even for people used to BDSM.

Gray came up beside Natsu and stood by the bed, gazing down as his erotically eager lover's position, feet planted, his hands on the bed, leaned over with his bare ass sticking out so temptingly. "Are you ready?"

Those low, sinfully threatening words made chills run over Natsu's skin. He was too tense to get any words out of his mouth. He nodded instead, still not taking his eyes off Gray.

"Remember, safewords. I've … um…" He laughed nervously, breaking his domineering persona for a moment. "I've never used this before," he confessed, testing the weight of the paddle in his hand some more. "I'm not sure how it will feel, other than when I hit myself with it."

Natsu's eyes widened. "You hit yourself?"

"Well, I have to test it out somehow," he said defensively. "I swung it against pillows and my own thigh just to test it out."

"I can't imagine you getting hit." Natsu thought about that concept for a moment. "Do you like getting hit?"

"Uh, I don't know," Gray said awkwardly. "I mean, depending, sometimes it feels good. Why?"

"Just … wondering."

Gray saw that Natsu had one of those looks again, like he was fantasizing about something. It always amused him to see those green eyes gleaming like that. "Do you wanna try that sometime?"

Natsu jolted in a start. "Me? Hitting you?"

"Not right now, but someday?"

His eyes shined for a moment, but lack of confidence quickly won over. "I don't know if I'd like that. I mean, I like it on myself, but I'm not sure how I'd feel hurting you."

"It's something to think about. I'm not sure if I'd like it. I might, if it's you, but if you don't like doing it…" He shook the confusion out of his head. "Think about that another time. Focus on this now. Are you ready?"

"Stop wasting time."

"Yeah, yeah," he sassed. Then Gray tenderly rubbed Natsu's butt cheeks. "I'll start out soft, just testing it out." He hit Natsu with the paddle gently.

"Oh come on," Natsu grumbled. "Wuss!"

"Hey, I'm seeing how you like it, jerk."

"You know I like it rough."

"Fine!" Gray whacked the paddle against him, and he saw the skin underneath instantly turn pink.

Natsu felt the smack. His muscles tensed instinctively, and that tightened around the butt plug. It made getting hit on his butt far more intense. "Holy … wow."

"Good?"

"Those bumps hurt. It feels more like getting punched with knuckles than slapped with a hand."

"They hurt, huh? Hurt good?" Gray paddled Natsu again, a little harder this time.

"Oh God, yes," Natsu gasped. He both wanted to clench his ass, and loosen it for the large plug wedged in there. The two conflicting desires made his body tremble, and he was clenching the sheets already.

"How many is that?"

"Huh? Three?"

"Correct. I want you to count them. Let's see how many you can take."

Gray pulled the paddle back further and really let it fly. A resounded crack of rubber against flesh shattered the air in the room. It also hit the edge of the butt plug, ramming it in.

"FUCK!" Natsu howled.

"Oh God, I'm sorry."

"No! That … do it like that," he panted. "God … oh God, that was … Shit!" Natsu dropped his head to the mattress, muting himself as he gasped at how much it hurt … and how amazing it felt. His ass tingled from the strikes. His body shivered from the intensity. He wanted to really feel that hard silicone inside of him.

"How many was that?" Gray demanded sharply.

"Four," he said in a heavy exhale, not raising his head up.

The paddle went flying, and the smack was instantly followed by Natsu crying out. Tears now came to his eyes.

"Are you okay?"

"That was a lot harder," he cried out, his voice choking up.

"I could do much worse." Gray pulled the paddle far back, but he realized Natsu had completely tensed up, pulling away from the impending strike. "No?" he asked, worried about the cowering position.

"I … I don't know," Natsu admitted. It still hurt, and something more was wrong. He was not sure what yet, but … it wasn't completely how he wanted to feel! What was missing? For now, his ass simply stung. "Can you rub it out?"

"Sure," Gray smiled, and he tenderly soothed out the pink marks with their deeper red indents from the metal studs. He saw Natsu loosen up. "Better?"

"Yeah." He suddenly flinched when Gray rubbed over one of the areas that the rivet had beaten in. There would be a bizarre pocking of bruises on his butt tomorrow. "Gray … this is punishment, right?"

"Yes. For breaking one of my rules and making me touch you in the guild, this is punishment."

"Okay," he said.

Was that the missing element? If it was just Gray hitting him for the sake of hitting him, it was not good. If anything, it made Natsu want to throw a punch at his rival. But if it was punishment…

Fairy Tail had strict rules about punishment games, bets of honor, and receiving reprimands for breaking rules. Such punishments had to be accepted, no matter what. This was punishment for breaking a rule they had between themselves. He knew Gray did not want to get kinky in public. He made him do it anyway. Now…

"Punish me."

Gray licked his lips at the submissive plea. "You're very naughty. You didn't count the last hit. You get it again."

"No!" he cried out, but a second later Natsu felt the sting to his flesh.

"Count it!" Gray shouted.

"F-five," he yelled, trying to hold his crying in. He could not sob. He was a Fairy Tail wizard.

A sneer of sadistic pleasure rose on Gray's lips. How delicious, hearing his rival gasping and watching him quiver! He pulled the paddle back and let it swing. The resounded crack was so hard, it pressed Natsu's whole body forward on the bed.

"Shit! Six!" Natsu bellowed. It hurt. It hurt so much. Tears dripped without him even able to stop them.

Gray growled menacingly, "I won't go easy on you."

He smacked Natsu's ass again, and this time the Dragon Slayer screamed "Seven!" Gray began to draw back, but he heard sobbing. Natsu would not cry at physical strikes like this. Something mental and emotional must be going through his head. Gray tried to look down to see his face, but the Dragon Slayer was burying his wet eyes amidst the sheets.

"Safewords, remember!"

"I … I know," he sobbed, trembling as he accepted his brutal punishment.

"Was it worth it?" Gray asked, his voice husky with lust. "Was it worth breaking one of my rules?"

Natsu did not want to answer. Worth it? Hell yes! He had been dreaming about Gray for days. He needed this. He hated to admit it, but he was addicted. There was no way he could go two weeks without feeling like this. The pain, the pleasure, the deepening love … He would trample Hell to get to Gray, so accepting a few spanks was not a big deal.

The next smack burned. Natsu wailed out the word, "Eeeeight!" Then he curled up again, as if hiding. "Gray," he squeaked out.

He was bad. He was naughty. He defied Gray. Now, he was being beaten like a child.

Igneel had spanked him from time to time. Makarov often hit him. Erza, too. Whenever he was bad, he ended up getting punished. That was all this was. However, no one had spanked him since Igneel, and that was more of a flick of his talon against Natsu's butt. Hurt like hell, too! There was something deeper, more personal, about getting spanked.

The next paddle really was like a punch to the ass, and Natsu felt the butt plug ram in painfully, rubbing over his prostate.

"N-n-nine," he sobbed, stuttered through tears. "One … one more."

Gray drew it back far and let the rubber paddle bash right against his ass.

Natsu screamed, "Ten and Yellow!"

Gray dropped the paddle and held Natsu, pulling him up to the pillows. The burning hot body trembled from pain and euphoria. "Sheesh, you don't have to push yourself."

"I know, I just … I wanted … at least ten," he sobbed.

"Natsu…"

"I'm fine! I'm…" He snuffled up thickly and wiped his wet eyes. He laughed blithely. "That thing hurts like hell."

"Are you okay?"

"Yeah…?" He sighed and relaxed. "Yeah," he said with more assurance. "I'm tough. I can take it. Felt … good. Real good!"

Gray laid on the bed, hugging Natsu closely while the Dragon Slayer slowly recovered from the beating. This was a delicate moment, when Natsu was at his most emotional, when lightness and darkness were in a balance. Gray wanted Natsu to feel only the cathartic comfort of being beaten and then loved.

Then he realized the plug was still inside of Natsu's ass. "I completely forgot to turn this on." Gray reached down to the knob that stuck out of the plug and twisted it. Natsu felt the buzz deep within him and almost leaped off the bed.

"Ahhhh! Whoa! Gray."

"Are you okay?"

"Oh yeah," he grinned. It was an amazing sensation. Nothing, not even Gray's fingers or cock, was quite like the vibrations purring inside him. "Oh God, that's…"

"It's only the lowest setting," Gray told him, smiling at just how easily Natsu responded. "Hey, Natsu?"

Gray suddenly spanked him only lightly with his hand. Natsu clenched, but this time the buzz made the sensation far more intensely pleasurable. He gasped and choked on groans trying to bubble up in his throat.

Gray leaned into his ear. "I wanna spank you until you come."

"N-no! I can't. I … I can't…"

"Yes you can. We've done stuff like this before already. Remember the candles?" Gray rose onto his knees, dominating over Natsu, and pulled him so his face was down in the pillows and his ass was in the air. "That thing's gonna buzz you until you can't stand it, and I'm gonna hit you until you come … and splatter all over these sheets."

Gray spanked him again, and Natsu whined with a highness to his voice that was almost comical. It made Gray smile, but the quivering he saw on Natsu's ass kept him from flat out laughing. He wanted to be inside there. He wanted the heat and tightness.

But not yet. Not while he was sick. It was torture!

"You torment me," he growled. Gray picked up the paddle. "You seduce me, enthrall me. I said I needed to keep away from you, and you didn't obey. You knew how addicted I am to you, and you just keep on teasing me," he growled, grinning animalistically. "How dare you do this to me!"

He smacked Natsu's ass hard, and Natsu screamed from the torturous pleasure. He had thought the pain was over, but he only said Yellow. He only meant to wait. He knew there would be more. Gray had a new toy to play with, and Natsu…

He wanted more!

"G-Gray," he sobbed.

"Yellow?"

"No. I'm good. I'm … It hurts," he cried. "Holy shit, it hurts."

"Good!" he thudded cruelly, and Gray slapped the paddle against him again.

Natsu's body spasmed, and he cried out. Gray heard real agony in that scream, and it jolted him.

"Natsu?" he asked worriedly. He had not hit any harder than earlier, but he guessed the vibrating plug would make the sensations stronger.

"Oh … oh God," Natsu wept. He buried his face into the pillows. It hurt … so much. So good! "More," he whispered into the downy fluff.

Gray barely heard the word, but it warmed him up. More, huh? Natsu must surely be in pain, yet … more?

"Damn, you are so sexy," he whispered, wanting this man with aching desperation. "You are so … damn … hot!"

Without holding back at all, he swung the paddle, purposely aiming for part of it to hit the butt plug as well. Natsu's head arched up, he screamed to the ceiling, before collapsing back down and muffling his sobs.

Gray could not take any more neglect. He reached into his boxers to stroke himself. He needed just a little … just enough.

"Look at this. Making me wet. Making me touch myself. What a naughty dragon!"

Natsu sobbed. He was bad. He broke Gray's rules. He tortured Gray, enslaved him, and teased him with his own sexuality. What a slut! What a bitch!

"You seductive little bitch," Gray snarled.

Yes! That was what he wanted to hear. How bad he was! He was always berated in the guild. Makarov and Erza were always pounding him for being destructive. Now he was being beaten for something better. He had destroyed Gray's resolve. He deserved to be punished.

Another hit bruised his flesh, but Natsu felt something about to break within him. It was just a little too much.

"Yellow," he warned.

"Okay. I'll ease it out."

He felt a cold hand caressing his burning, aching skin. It soothed the pain. He liked when Gray punished him, but what was even better, what made the punishment bearable, was when Gray took care of him afterward. This tenderness made the darkness vanish. The pain vanquished the demons that haunted his mind, and the relief soothed his heart, filling him with light. Fresh tears came to Natsu's eyes, but these were different. Instead of tears of pain, they were tears of love.

"Are you okay?"

"Y-yeah…" Always, Gray asked that. Natsu knew the ice wizard really cared about him whenever he asked.

"Are you really okay?"

He loved how truly worried Gray sounded. He could act harsh, but he knew that deep inside, Gray cared for him so much.

"I'm fine," he smiled. Gray might not be able to tell him, but Natsu sensed the love in those questions. Gray cared deeply. He loved deeply, even if the emotion scared him. "Just…" He looked over his shoulder. He needed to see Gray's face. "Can you handcuff me … and touch me?"

Gray wanted nothing more than to do just that. Seeing Natsu's erection was even more tempting. However, he feared the disease living on his skin.

"Natsu, I really shouldn't…"

"Please."

"I … shouldn't," Gray said in anguish. "I've touched myself. The bacteria could be on my fingers. I'll have to sterilize my hands. Can you wait?"

"I don't wanna. It'll kill the mood if I wait that long."

"Natsu…" Impatient brat! "I mean, I could if I put a glove on…"

"No!" Natsu shouted, his eyes huge.

"Okay, no glove," Gray said, stroking his pink hair back soothingly. "I … I really shouldn't." Yet he wanted to, and he saw how much Natsu wanted it. If only he had not touched himself! The doctor said the bacteria could even be in the pre-cum, and he still felt wetness on his fingers. He could have put a glove on, but that obviously made Natsu remember something bad. He could have used one of his masturbation toys, but Natsu had horrific memories of those as well.

What about cloth? Just cloth?

"Hold on a second." Gray yanked the top sheet and draped it over his hand. Then he took hold of Natsu's erection through the sheet. It was not a rubber glove, but he hoped it was safe enough.

"What…?" Natsu looked down at the sheet.

"This way I'm not in direct contact with your skin," he explained. "I'll have to change my sheets anyway," he reasoned with a laugh. Then he eyed Natsu's face. "Is this okay?"

"Yeah. It's weird," he pouted.

"It's still me," he said, and he kissed Natsu's forehead. "It's me doing this. Touching you. Like stroking you through your underwear. I really wanna try that sometime. Stroke you off in your pants." He nipped down Natsu's neck and kissed down his spine. His tongue licked some of the spotted bruises on Natsu's ass, sucking on the tender skin. Then he blew a stream of icy air against Natsu's scrotum.

Natsu's eyes went wide at the frigid caress of air. "Ahhhh! No … no, handcuffs."

"Nats-…"

"Please! I need them. Feel … weird. Need it. Can't … can't trust myself."

"But Natsu, last time…"

Natsu glared back angrily. "Restrain me before I fucking kill you."

Gray jolted back at the growl. Why was this like a regression back to earlier times? Was it because of the separation? Natsu went merely a week without Gray. Or was it the emotional drama of this whole week? Probably that. It had been a lot to deal with, getting sick and all the fears. Surely, it brought up a lot of emotional scars for Natsu as well. So Gray obeyed, and he iced Natsu's hands to the headboard.

"Yes," Natsu hissed. He pulled at the ice cuffs. "Okay. I'm good. You'll be safe now. I can … I can…" He tensed up and gulped down a moan. "Touch me. I'm … close. Please, Gray."

"What a troublesome little dragon," he sighed, shaking his head with a smile. He covered his hand in the sheet again and stroked the erection that hung down toward the mattress.

"Yes," Natsu shuddered. He suddenly yanked on the ice cuffs. "Oh … God…"

"That's it. Come for me, Natsu. What if I make you feel it more?" he whispered, and he reached down, twisting the dial on the butt plug to a higher setting. Natsu cried out at the added pleasure. "Got quite a buzz to it, eh?"

"Mm-hmm," Natsu whinnied, clamping his mouth shut as he struggled to hold back moans. His body squirmed as the inner part of him trembled from the vibrations.

"It's still not even the highest setting. Do you want more?"

"Mmmmm!" he moaned heatedly.

"Ask nicely."

"More, please!" he urgently cried out.

"Nope, ask nicer."

"Oh G- … God," Natsu trembled. "P-please, kainushi. Please, gimme more."

"You're so hot."

He cranked the vibrator to full power, and copious pre-cum dripped down Natsu's penis as the Dragon Slayer screamed and his thighs trembled. Gray thought for sure he would come right then, but Natsu clenched it back, stopping himself from releasing fully.

"Stubborn, eh?" He smacked Natsu's ass again, and this time he felt the jolt in that burning cock as well as seeing how the butt muscles tensed up, only to quiver from the intensified vibrations. "So sexy. You're such a mess. I can feel how wet you are through these sheets. You're drenching them. You must have a lot saved up inside, ready to blow."

Natsu whimpered as he felt the cold hand stroking him more and more.

"Dripping everywhere…"

"Shut up," Natsu growled through clenched teeth.

"Your ass is quivering…"

"Sh-shut up!"

"You're loving all of this. Everything I'm doing to you, you love it."

"Sh-sh-shut … up … Gray." He was a tense mass of shaking muscles. Everything in his body wanted to give in, but his mind protested. "Gr- … can't…"

"Come for me, Natsu," he breathed. Gray ached, and he rubbed the erection in his boxers against Natsu's leg, needing some friction again. "Hurry up and come."

"C-can't!" He pulled at the ice cuffs suddenly, slamming them again and again against the bars of the headboard. "No! No, stop! I can't! I won't."

"Natsu…"

"Dammit, stop! I won't. You can't make me."

Why had he slipped back into rape fantasy? Gray thought they made such progress. He had to admit, he felt a bit angry.

"Quit that, you idiot." He picked up the paddle again and whacked the reddened ass hard.

Natsu jolted. "N-no … no…"

"You're gonna come for me," Gray snarled. "I'm gonna hit you … until you come!"

He whacked the paddle over and over, not giving Natsu any rest. He lost count. Three … four … seven? Over and over.

Natsu no long felt just smacks to the flesh, but the pounding to his ass … the buzz, the pain, the ramming, as if Gray was thrusting into him with brutal force. Again … again … again!

"Bite me!" Natsu shouted.

"Why?" Gray smirked deviously.

"Fuck, Gray, if you don't bite me, I'll have to say Red!"

Gray decided to give Natsu that much leniency. He leaned over and sank his teeth into the salty flesh of Natsu's hip, biting him there instead.

Natsu gasped. Gray normally bit his neck, but biting there … holy shit, it felt way more erotic!

"Harder!" he cried out, shuddering with the impending orgasm. "Nnngh! Please, harder!"

Gray really tightened his jaws, chomping down until he thought he might break skin.

Natsu could not even stop it. He came hard from the euphoric pain of the bite and all those hits. Thick white semen filled the sheet covering Gray's hand. His face buried into the pillow as he groaned animalistically with each pulsing surge. He felt…

Scared.

Relieved.

Ashamed.

Amazing.

Gray's teeth let go. There was no blood, but he could see dark purple teeth marks embedded into Natsu's hip. "God, that was hot!" he gawked in awe. He forgot how sexy Natsu sounded as he moaned out his orgasm.

"Bastard," Natsu hissed wearily. "No more. No more spanks. Please."

"Please … what?" Gray teased.

Natsu trembled at the feeling of being beaten into submission. "Please, kainushi. No more. Please."

"Good dragon." What an amazing man this was! Gray could give Natsu his worst, really be brutally sadistic, and he recovered so fast. He stared at the boy, lost within a surge of emotions. Gray remembered that Natsu did not too much like when he pet his head, so he rubbed Natsu's ass instead. The Dragon Slayer flinched hard and pulled away. "Are you okay?"

"It hurts," he whimpered.

"I'm sorry…"

"No! No, it's … good. It stings, but … it's good."

"Natsu," he sighed, loving the way that summery name sounded on his lips.

"It … hurts."

"Of course it does," Gray said smugly. "I spanked you until you came."

Yes. Punished.

Punished into coming.

Punished … into … coming…

Natsu suddenly screamed and cowered down. "Don't do it. Don't!"

Gray backed off. What the hell? "Natsu?"

"R-red."

"What the…? It's already over," Gray said in total confusion.

"No, red! Stop it!"

"Natsu." Then he realized the butt plug was still vibrating. He reached down and quickly twisted it off. "There. Sorry if that was…"

"Don't!" He curled around the wet spot on the bed. "D-don't … don't take it."

Gray looked worried. "Natsu, what the hell…?"

"Don't touch me!" he roared viciously.

Gray kept his hands back. "Hey," he whispered, hoping to calm Natsu down. "Hey, it's me. It's over. Dammit, what happened?" he asked in real worry.

"I'm … gonna kill you." It was not said as a threat, but more like a warning. Natsu shivered and hunkered down. "I'll kill you one day. I don't wanna, but I will."

"Natsu, I can fight on par with you. You're not going to kill me, because I'll kick your ass before you can try it."

"I … I will. I'll kill you. Don't … don't take my cum."

"I don't want it," he said automatically. "Was that the issue? Was the sheet too much?" He began to reach toward Natsu's hunched back, yet he paused and pulled back, realizing Natsu might not want to be touched while feeling like this. "These sheets will be tossed into the wash, you know. The hot water will destroy the cum. It'll wash away." Gray sighed and collapsed onto the bed to the side of Natsu. His arousal had gone limp so fast, leaving him tired and just a little frustrated. "Seriously, I leave you for a week and you're a mess again. Cuddle me when you've calmed down. I won't touch you until you're ready. Just tell me what you need."

Natsu stayed where he was for only a minute, shivering as flashbacks haunted him. Slowly, as if making a huge choice to trust Gray, Natsu pushed the messy wet sheet to the foot of the bed and curled down beside the ice wizard.

"Hold me," he whispered wearily.

"Are you better?"

"My ass is killing me."

"But your heart?"

Natsu laid there quietly, staring straight ahead. Finally, he merely said, "Hold me." As soon as those arms were around him, Natsu relaxed more. "I thought I was getting better."

"You were," Gray told him. "Did I say something?"

"Not really. Just … realizing something. I don't even really get it. What the hell triggered it? Maybe it's something I can't clearly remember."

"Did anything happen this week? Did another pervert touch you while you were on that mission?"

"No, just … dreams. Nightmares."

"Same here," Gray whispered.

Natsu rolled around to face those blue eyes. "What do you dream about?"

Gray looked into those pointed eyes, and he caressed the side of Natsu's head where, just last night, he had seen a bullet blast away a part of that skull. "Watching you get killed in front of me."

"Sheesh, Gray!"

"It's my biggest fear: losing you."

Natsu's mouth dropped, but he looked away with a worried pout. "Do you really think you'll lose me so easily?"

"I didn't think I would ever lose my parents," Gray said solemnly. "Or Ur. Or anyone, really. It can happen so fast. One minute, you're talking with them and everything is cheery and laughs; the next minute…" He gulped hard and slammed his eyes shut. "Natsu, I … I don't want…" He turned away, struggling with the chaotic thoughts.

"What?" he asked in worry.

"Nothing. I'll tell you when I'm not sick. It's just … I'm getting so scared," he admitted. "I dream about losing you, one way or another. Most of the time, they're just nightmares, but sometimes, especially now, I think you're going to realize I'm disgusting and run away."

"Gray!" He reached forward and stroked his cold cheek. "Sheesh, you…" Natsu pulled his hand back and fisted it. "It's unfair."

"What? What isn't fair?"

He snuffled moistly, although his face showed nothing of emotions. "Nothing."

"Natsu…?"

"I'll tell you when you're not sick," he said in the same tone Gray had used.

"Brat!"

"I'm only a brat around you," Natsu smirked.

"Nah, you're always a brat. I wouldn't want you any other way."

"You better not. This is how I am. Still, it's a bit unfair. You dream of the future; I'm still trapped in the past. It's hard for me to even think of a future."

Gray's eyebrows lifted, feeling slightly concerned. "You don't think of our future?"

"Not really," he admitted casually. "Not far ahead."

Gray turned his gaze aside. In his dream, Natsu said he wanted a family. They spoke as if they would stay together forever. It was depressing to hear that Natsu was not thinking about such things.

"If there's a magic out there that can remove a memory," Natsu sighed wearily, "I wouldn't mind it. Just forget it all. I wanna stop being trapped in the past. I hate this." They were both quiet for a while, staring with their own private thoughts, until finally Natsu whined, "Dammit, I just want us to fuck one another without this bullshit."

"It's just been a while," Gray muttered.

"Yeah, but … I'm starting to wonder if it's worth it."

Gray jolted in horror. Worth it? Worth what? "What do you mean?"

"Nothing," Natsu mumbled.

Gray grabbed his arms in desperation. "Natsu…"

"It's fine, really. Just … it gets frustrating, that's all. I keep messing things up, I can't stay in the moment, and I feel like you're gonna rush ahead of me and I won't get a chance to catch up. Oh, forget it. It's just … worries. Insecurities, I guess is what you call them. Hey," he said loudly, "can you get this plug out of me already? I'm all soft and spent, but it's still spreading my ass. It's a little weird now."

Natsu's words really scared Gray. He barely realized how desperate he was to stay by Natsu's side until those words made him fear that Natsu truly might leave him. If it's worth it. What the hell did Natsu mean by that? It's unfair. What wasn't fair? A plethora of fears and doubts wiggled into Gray's mind. He wanted to grasp tightly to Natsu and cling to him.

But what if Natsu didn't want that? Didn't guys normally hate clingy girlfriends? Gray had known a few clingy girls—Juvia, for one, who refused to stop following him everywhere—and those sorts were the worst for him. But wasn't he acting just as bad?

Was it because he could not say how he felt? Since he could not say it, did he feel even more desperate to show it?

Natsu rolled onto his stomach, and Gray looked down at the plug. This was a good alternative, but it was not the same as being in that ass. Natsu obviously loved it, though, so that was good. Gray was unsure when he bought it, but he had asked the lady at the sex shop what she recommended when he could not perform on his own. This had been her solution. He owed that lady a free drink someday. She was one of the few people he could talk to openly about kinky things.

Gray took hold of the plug's end sticking out. "This will probably hurt," he warned.

"It'll be fine with you doing it," Natsu mumbled into the pillows.

Gray chuckled softly and shook his head. "You have too much confidence in me."

"Because I know you love me," Natsu said with utmost trust.

Gray flinched at how easily he spoke those words. "Natsu…"

"You don't have to say it." He looked back and smiled. "I already know. I love you, so I trust you. Now, get this thing out."

Gray nodded, gripped the butt plug firmly, and yanked. Natsu shouted as the bulbous head once again spread him to a massive girth, and then the plug slipped out with narrowing ease.

"Okay, yeah, that hurt," he cringed.

"I guess it's harder to get out after you've relaxed."

"Yeah," Natsu agreed through tightly gritted teeth, feeling the pain lingering, but also the emptiness left behind that he wished Gray's cold body could fill up.

Gray stood and walked to the bathroom to toss the plug into the sink to be washed later. While he was there, he sterilized his hands. "Are you okay with that thing?"

"It's … interesting," Natsu decided with some hesitancy. "Not as good as you, but the vibrating was amazing. I could get spoiled on that."

"You better not!" Gray returned and flopped onto the bed. "Once I'm well, I'm back in control."

Natsu hummed and snuggled into Gray's chest. "Can't wait."

Gray let out a contented sigh. The endorphins were crashing, and with them he felt glowing peace settle over him, like sitting by the fire on a winter day.

"Gray?"

"Hmm?"

"Can I take a nap before we clean up?"

"I'm pretty tired, too. Just yank up the quilt. Leave the messy sheet on the floor."

Natsu covered them both with the blanket and settled down on the pillow. Gray kissed him on the forehead and pulled Natsu close to spoon around him.

"Little nap," Gray murmured drowsily, already zonking out. "Missed … you … bastard."

Natsu sank into Gray's arms and closed his eyes to the sensual weariness. "I missed you, too … ice-idiot."

Chapter Text

Gray could not remember precisely when he fell asleep, but when he woke up, the shadows had shifted in his room. It was late afternoon now, and his bedroom felt stifling hot. Heat burned beside him on the bed, and with that warmth was the smell of cinnamon and campfires. Gray had missed Natsu's unique smell. When he rolled over, those sharp green eyes were already open and watching him.

"Hey," yawned Gray. "Been up long?"

"I just woke up, actually. I was watching you for maybe a minute."

"Are you okay?"

Natsu smiled. "I feel a lot better. I needed that. Probably need a shower now."

"Yeah," Gray agreed sleepily. "I could really use a good jacking off in the shower."

Natsu laughed at that blunt honesty. His hot fingers drifted down and felt the morning woody. "We didn't get around to taking care of you."

"You were damn hot, and that was exhausting."

"Are you that out of shape, ice princess?" teased Natsu.

"Screw you," Gray yawned drowsily. "Emotional exhaustion." He let out a long sigh of contentment and stared up at the ceiling and the lazy sunshine making swaying shadows. "I missed this."

"Hitting me?"

"No, waking up with you beside me. I like it. I guess I don't sleep well without someone in my bed."

Natsu's brow flinched a little. "Someone … anyone?"

Gray turned his eyes over to Natsu. "Don't be silly."

"I gotta wonder," smirked Natsu, "just how many other people have been in this bed?"

"Too many," Gray sleepily mumbled.

Natsu felt a stab to his chest at that flippant confession. "Really?" he mumbled.

Gray rolled over and glomped Natsu. "None as warm as you."

That did not make Natsu feel any better. "Gray?"

He only hummed, too happy with his arms wrapped around Natsu's burning shoulders and his nose nuzzled into the scarred neck.

"Be honest. How many people have you slept with?"

Gray jolted up and propped himself on an elbow. "What? You're asking that now?"

"I didn't want to ask at all," he admitted. "Still, it's been bugging me, and I can't fully relax until it stops bugging me. You can make a guess, round up to the nearest hundred."

"Jeez, I'm not that bad," scoffed Gray.

Natsu laughed softly. "I'm just curious. Ten? Twenty?"

Gray collapsed and draped an arm over his eyes. "Dammit, Natsu…"

"I wanna know everything about you, and that's part of it. As much as I don't actually wanna think about it, I probably should know, just in case. This week, your past came up and bit you pretty hard on the ass. I wanna know about that past, that way I'm prepared to deal with it in the future."

Gray let out another sigh. Nothing to do but be honest. He began to list, thinking back to his very first girl. He had been way too young, honestly, but he was curious what this whole sex thing was about, and she wanted to experiment with him. When he was sixteen, he dated a really nice sakura girl for five months. He really got more of a feel for sex with her. Then that brunette in the port town. That was just a fling. Then there was…

"Wait, are you counting on your fingers?" Natsu cried out.

Gray realized he had been. "Well, I want to answer honestly. The gymnast … the baker's daughter … that ivory-haired wizard from Blue Pegasus … those two college girls…"

"Wait, two?" shouted Natsu. "As in two at once?"

"Shut up, I'm losing count," he snapped. "That dancer at the strip club, her twin sister … no, don't count her."

"Why not?"

"Well, what do you mean by slept with? Do you mean people whom I've … y'know, stuck my dick into their pussies, or do you also mean just oral sex?"

"I … I don't know," Natsu muttered, feeling sick just thinking about Gray's vast experience. "I'm just … wondering … how many girls … or guys too, I guess." He suddenly flipped over, turning his shoulders coldly to Gray while shouting, "Dammit, just forget it! Forget I asked. I don't wanna know."

Gray looked down at him. He felt bad for Natsu. He had, after all, taken this young man's virginity and forced him into a world of sexual debaucheries most people never even dream about. Even if Natsu insisted he would not be submissive, Gray felt like he was responsible for the Dragon Slayer. Gray was older, more experienced, and he had been the one to do all this to Natsu. His inner Dominant said he had to care for this Submissive, while the gentleman in him felt that he had to be honest, be tender, and take responsibility for being Natsu's first partner.

"Twenty-seven," he answered quietly, feeling guilty as he confessed it. "Twenty-seven that I've actually had penetrative sex, not just oral sex."

Natsu stayed turned away, staring off into the corner of his room. "Twenty-seven … girls?"

"Twenty-three girls, four guys, counting you. Well, I didn't enter two of the guys, but I'm counting it: one was still anal sex, but I received, and the other was a threesome so although the guy and I only touched each other a bit, I'll count that anyway."

"And the other two guys?"

"One is you, and the other … was my first boyfriend," he admitted hesitantly. "First time trying a homosexual relationship. We had sex maybe three times. I topped. He broke it off after two months. He didn't like me being away on missions for long periods of time. End of story."

Natsu wondered if Gray had ever felt love. These sounded like such empty relationships. "Twenty-seven," he whispered. "That's a lot less than the guild imagines."

"Well, that's just how many I fucked. It doesn't count people who have sucked me off or whom I've—you know—gone down on."

"If you did include those?"

Gray cringed. "Please don't make me count." His whole past swarmed up on him like an tsunami. All those people he randomly picked up: drunken sluts, pretty flirts, or some were really amazing people whom he treated with tenderness, so many faces came into his mind. "Maybe around sixty, possibly closer to seventy. I honestly don't know. There were a few months just after Tenrou Island when I picked up people a lot, mostly girls, a few guys. I didn't sleep with most of them. I got them off, they got me off, it was what we both needed, and we split. Sometimes I didn't even get their names. It became a weekly thing for … I don't know how long. Sometimes more than once a week. I was pretty depressed about losing seven years, y'know. During that time, I pretty much did live up to the reputation I had. Maybe I just gave up all sense of morals, since people thought I didn't have any to begin with. So yeah, a lot of partners around that time. I couldn't possibly count, especially since I was drunk most of the time."

"My God," whispered Natsu. Seventy? And so random. Did Gray really treat sex so casually?

"Natsu?" Gray asked, really worried about confessing all this. "Are you okay with this?" The pink-haired man did not reply. "Natsu!"

"No, I'm fine," he muttered in shock. "It's just…"

How could he compete? How could he possibly please a man so used to sex that he could let people—countless people—jerk him off and then just part ways?

But … this was Gray. He could either hate this or accept this.

"Okay," he decided, nodding his head. "It's part of your past, part of who you are." He firmed up his heart. "I want to love you, to accept everything about you, and that includes your past."

"Can you really accept me despite all that?" Gray grumbled, feeling filthy from the indiscriminateness of his past. "I mean, I was a man-whore, plain and simple. I would fuck anyone who'd allow me into their pants and…" He snuffled up as emotions hit him hard. "…and I paid for it. Paid for my own lack of discretion. Fucked around and got a fucking disease. Serves me right. Isn't that what you all think?"

"Gray…"

He lashed out, "That's what almost everyone told me at the guild. Serves you right. They weren't surprised at all. They all said I got what I deserved."

Natsu stroked Gray's arm comfortingly. "The guild doesn't think that anymore."

"Anymore! But that's what everyone said at first, because that's what they all really think. Oh, sure," he mocked. "They all pity me now, all feel bad about saying that shit, but they just said what they really thought. Now you know the truth. Now you know just how much of a whore I used to be. Some horny bastard who used people without a thought, and now I'm paying for it."

He waited a long time, wondering how Natsu might reply to his outburst. He expected—wanted—to hear Natsu deny all of it, reassure him he was not a whorish slut. So when Natsu said nothing at all, darkness fell over Gray's heart.

"Got anything to say?" he snapped. Still, nothing. "Natsu? Come on, say something."

After another long pause, he said hollowly, "I feel … like a total amateur."

"What?"

"Nothing," he muttered distantly. "Look, it's … it's okay that you did all that in the past. That was the past. This is now. I need to get out of being stuck in my own past, so I can't very well blame you about your past, right? It's … past."

"Eloquent as ever," teased Gray.

"You're loyal to me, right?"

"Of course I am!"

"Have you flirted with anyone, even slightly?"

"I've turned down at least ten girls who tried to flirt with me since we began dating. I'm an exclusive person. When I decide to seriously pursue a relationship, I don't cheat. Ever! Not in the slightest."

"Then that's all that matters," Natsu decided. Still, he looked troubled by something more. He did not really want to ask, but … he needed to. "Gray, why would you date someone like me?"

"What are you talking about?" he asked, feeling worried again.

"Obviously, you could have any person you want. You could hook up with someone who really knows what they're doing. So why me? I was a virgin. I don't know anything about this stuff. Am I just interesting to you? Because I'm so naïve, is it funny to watch me being clueless? Or is it just because I let you hit me? I'm … convenient, right? You said something like that early on. No one else will let you do this much. So … I'm just … more resilient, tough enough for you, and that's all … right?"

"Natsu!" Gray scolded.

"Sorry. I'm feeling really out of my league right now." He tried to laugh it off, but his eyes showed the pain deep inside. "Sorry. Forget about it."

Gray caressed his face. "How inexperienced you were doesn't matter to me." He tugged on Natsu's chin until he urged it over, and he gazed into those narrow eyes. "Okay? It doesn't matter."

"It should," Natsu muttered.

"Why?" Gray cried out. "What's the big deal?"

"Nothing. Absolutely nothing," he grumbled. "You're probably laughing inside at how stupid I am."

"Natsu, stop it!" he snapped. Gray slammed the Dragon Slayer flat against the mattress and crawled on top of him. "Shut up and listen to me. You are an amazing man, damn hot, absolutely wonderful. You are the best thing that ever happened to me. So stop this. Just because you haven't had a bunch of partners … isn't that a good thing? Better than me. Better than being a fucking man-whore. I want you how you are, and I really do hope you can accept me for who I am, and for who I was in the past. I like you just the way you are, for who you are. I like everything about you, including how cutely innocent you are."

"Cute my ass!" Natsu growled petulantly.

"Your ass, too. Everything about you," he said with light teasing. "I like that I don't feel restricted around you. I can go wild, or I can break down, and you accept me both when I'm in control and when I can't stand on my own feet. I like that I don't feel pressured around you. I like that you enjoy everything we do, even when I'm afraid it's too much. Even though I'm not all that experienced with actual bondage, we're learning together, and I like that. So don't worry. You're new to this, and I'm not all that experienced with BDSM, so it works out."

"You sure seem experienced," he mumbled.

"I really wish I was," Gray admitted with a frown. "I'm always scared I'll do something wrong. I'm glad you're patient with me. Honestly, I've never felt like this with anyone else," he muttered, blushing slightly. "Even with the people I dated seriously, I could never go this far, or open myself up this much emotionally. It's … new. Scary. And I want you with me. I … need you with me. Desperately."

Natsu looked up and saw the weakness in those eyes. His heart softened, and he caressed Gray's cheek.

"Now, come on. No more thinking about the past. Just now. Just us." He curled down beside Natsu, and he felt the Dragon Slayer snuggle into his embrace.

Natsu let out a sleepy sigh. "Why do we always mess things up after good sex?"

"It's the only time we can talk about these things. Are we done talking seriously?"

"Sure. We can talk all cutesy now."

"Oh, shut up!" he growled.

Natsu laughed and rolled over to smile fake-cutely to Gray. In a girlish titter, he soughed, "Kainushi!"

"Hey! Don't make fun of that name. I like that name."

Natsu smiled sensually. "I like calling you that name."

That dangerous gaze thrilled Gray. "See, this is what I love about you."

Natsu's eyes went huge, and he bolted up in bed. "What you what?"

Gray had not even realized what he said, but when he did his eyes grew massive with terror. The dream from last night revisited him. "No! No, I said … I said about you. I didn't … No!" He grabbed Natsu by the head and yanked him in close, smothering him into his chest, trembling with the memories of the dream of Natsu getting his brains blown out. "I didn't say it. I didn't! Don't you dare die. I didn't say it."

"Sheesh, okay. You didn't. You said about me. That's not a confession or anything."

"Right. Right, not … not a confession. Not … something that might … might kill you."

"Jeez, Gray."

"Shut up! I had a nightmare last night that you died after I said I … that I … after saying those words."

"I see," he muttered with pity. Natsu let Gray cradled him. "Sorry about that. I'm fine. Still, you said you love something about me, right? That's a big step forward. That's good. That's real good."

"Maybe," he mumbled, trembling and clutching Natsu's head, "but that just scared the hell out of me."

"Hey, I'm not gonna get smashed by a monster or anything."

Gray glared angrily. "Don't even joke about that!"

Natsu jolted at the hateful glare in those eyes. Then he realized what he had said. "Oh crap. Sorry. That was really insensitive. I didn't think about what you went through. I'm sorry. But … at least you can say that much. You love things about me."

"It was a slip," he insisted with a deep shiver.

Natsu kissed Gray on the forehead. "It's a slip I wouldn't mind you making more often. You can love things about me, just like you love ice cream, right? And you love stripping out of your clothes."

"That's more of a bad habit," he grumbled.

"So you can love things about me. And tell me what you love, okay? I wanna hear what you love about me."

"Stop using that word so often," Gray screamed in terror.

"Oh. Sorry," whispered Natsu. He saw just how terrified Gray was getting from all this.

Gray turned away and huffed. What an incredibly stubborn boyfriend! "I'll … try," he mumbled. "I don't know if I can, but I can try. I … love … things about you."

A smile flitted back onto Natsu's face. "Like what?"

"I love … hearing you call me kainushi."

Natsu caressed Gray's cheek, down to his neck and leaned into his ear. He whispered hotly, "Cuddle me, kainushi."

A shiver warmed Gray's body. They laid back down, wrapped in one another's arms. Natsu stroked Gray's hair, and the trembling eased out of Gray's muscles.

"Better?" Natsu asked with a tender smile.

"I think so. That … was a really horrible nightmare."

"I won't let it become a reality. I won't die, promise. Now, we should clean up soon. You still need worked out, too."

"You can't touch me. You'll get sick."

"I know. Hey, do you know what we could try?"

Gray looked up in curiosity.

"I know we have to be careful with you, but … it's not fair if I'm the only one getting fun." Natsu leaned forward and whispered into his ear. "How about we stand in the shower together, a condom on you, and we rub each other off?"

"Under the shower?" That sounded hot. "But … I don't know if you can do that to me, even with a condom. The infection is on my skin, and condoms don't cover everything. Maybe if you wore latex gloves—"

"No!" Natsu shouted quickly.

"Okay, okay. Seriously, what's up with gloves?"

"Gloves … He…" Natsu's voice dropped to almost nothing. "That time long ago. He would wear gloves sometimes."

Gray rubbed those burning arms consolingly and felt prickles along Natsu's skin. He soothed out the goose bumps with his hands. As he had already guessed, this was another horror of the past.

"I can try," muttered Natsu, "but I'm not sure."

"We won't try anything you're uncomfortable doing. What about if I sterilize one hand, put a glove on the other, wear a condom, and I rub us both off?"

Natsu gasped as his heart fluttered. "At the same time?"

Gray smirked and nodded. "Same time."

"No condom or glove for me?"

"Nope. Shoot it into the drain to wash away into the sewer."

"Gah!" Natsu gasped, feeling a burst of intense arousal.

Gray chuckled. "You like that idea, don't you? Letting your cum go to waste, flushing it into the sewer, like it's just another piece of filth."

"Y-yeah," he admitted in a whisper, blushing with arousal. "It's weird, right?"

"No, it's sexy. You're sexy," Gray whispered, letting his eyes drift up and down that toned body. His boxers were beginning to feel uncomfortably tight again. "Let's shower."

Natsu left to turn on the water to warm up. Meanwhile, Gray searched around and returned with a condom and latex glove. When he came to the bathroom, Natsu was still adjusting the shower temperature.

"Is the water okay?"

"It's cold."

Gray reached his hand under the shower, but quickly pulled it back. "Cold my ass! It's burning."

Natsu laughed at his sensitivity to heat. Gray ripped the condom package open and took out the roll of latex.

"It's a good thing I always used these with you. I can hardly believe how lucky we were that you're not sick."

Natsu stepped forward and touched the latex-covered tip of Gray's penis. "Let me roll that down onto you. I've never done it before."

"You can't touch my skin!"

"I'll wash my hands." Natsu did not even wait for permission. He dropped to a knee to be close enough.

Gray gulped hard. That position was like the day after the big confession. It stabbed him to think that the one time Natsu did oral sex on him, Gray had put him into so much danger.

"Like this?" Natsu asked, rolling the condom on. "It's snug."

"Y-yeah. Roll it down." He panted as he watched Natsu rolling the condom down. Then those hot hands rubbed as he smirked mischievously. "Hey, don't rub it like that. Not yet."

Natsu chuckled and kept unrolling the condom down the shaft. "Nice and snug. There!" He gave a few strokes, but he pouted. "It's not as fun as with skin."

"I'll do it. You shouldn't touch me at all. Go wash your hands with disinfectant, right now. Don't touch your body."

Natsu obeyed, scrubbing his hands with antibacterial soap, and they finally got into the shower. As the water trickled down, Gray kissed Natsu, and the Dragon Slayer racked his nails over the ice wizard's chest, not scratching too hard, but making him tender. Then Gray reached down and stroked Natsu.

"Is that good?"

Natsu groaned sensually in reply.

"I can't believe you're hard already after all that."

"It's been too long," moaned Natsu.

"It's hardly been a week."

"Feels like too long. I can't stroke myself off, so it's all saved up inside. How about you? Have you been jacking off in the shower all week?"

"Actually, no. I haven't really been in the mood to pleasure myself. I'm rather mad at my dick, honestly, so I'm punishing it."

"Poor little guy."

"Little?"

Natsu chuckled playfully. "Time to give the icicle some attention."

"Hold on." He pulled the glove onto his other hand.

Natsu tensed up at seeing Gray snap the glove on. He could hardly help but remember cold, gloved hands.


"Look at that, boy. It's getting bigger. That means you're becoming a man. I'll train you. I'm gonna train you how to be a man. Don't cry. I know it doesn't hurt. Isn't it good, boy? Don't you even know what I'm doing? I bet you've never done this to yourself. Never touched down here. It's gonna feel amazing, you'll see. Becoming a man is fun, and you and I, we're gonna have lots of fun from now on."


"Natsu? Natsu!"

He snapped out of that terrifying past. "It's fine," he said automatically. "Gray…"

"I'm here," he said reassuringly, looking worried. "If this is no good—"

"No … it's … Restrain me." Natsu wanted to push past that nightmare. He wanted to experience this with Gray so the past could be swept aside. "The pipes. Ice my hands to the pipes, like our first time."

"First time?" Then he remembered their first night together. "With the ice cubes. You liked that, didn't you?"

"Yeah," he shuddered. That man might have forced Natsu's first orgasm, but he lost his virginity to Gray in this shower.

"Hands up," he whispered sensually. Natsu snapped to obey. Gray froze the wrists to the pipes. "Don't pull too much. Don't break my showerhead."

Gray rubbed Natsu with his free hand. He kept seeing flinches, but then the Dragon Slayer would open his eyes to take in the person in front of him. That would make him relax and moan.

"Aaaugh … mmm, Gray."

"Is it okay now?"

"It's you, so it's okay."

"I like to feel your heat in my hand."

Natsu groaned and arched his back, thrusting into those fingers. Gray reached down with his other hand. A latex glove against a latex condom was awkward, but the water helped to slick both. He stroked himself and Natsu at the same time. The pleasure he felt within himself reverberated in the Dragon Slayer. Those hot moans were the same sounds he wanted to make, except he was trying to stay in control.

"Feels … so good," groaned Natsu. "Being next to you, moving along with you." He looked up with lust and growled, "Gimme more."

Gray squeezed both of them at the same time, and Natsu moaned loudly.

"Oh Gray … nnngh! C-can you get the water hotter?"

"A little bit. It's scalding."

"It's too cold. Cold showers while doing this isn't good at all."

Gray adjusted the temperature, and Natsu's shuddering groan of relief was worth feeling just how hot the shower seemed to Gray. He would put up with the painful heat for Natsu's sake.

"Gray … mmmmmh, Gray."

"Shit," he hissed. After the emotional turmoil of the past few days, Gray desperately needed this sort of relief. The doctor was right, abstinence was best, but just for now, just for today…

Gray forced himself to slow down, and that meant the hand on Natsu slowed, too. The Dragon Slayer whimpered at the lessening of friction.

"Sorry," Gray panted. "I'm gonna come too soon."

"Go ahead. I wanna see it." Natsu's eyes flared with desire. "I wanna see you fill up that condom."

Gray jolted and hissed through his teeth at the Dragon Slayer's low, seductive voice. When Natsu talked like that, it turned Gray's legs to jelly.

"I wanna watch you lose yourself."

Gray's wrist moved faster, stroking himself frantically, and his face tensed up.

"I wanna see it, boy."

Gray jolted. That did not sound like Natsu, and the look the Dragon Slayer had was subtly different.

"Natsu?" Gray asked in worry.

"Show me," he said, but the words were different, a slight change to his accent. "Show me you're a man."

"Natsu, whatever you're doing, stop. This isn't you."

Natsu slowly began to realize what he had been saying. "I … oh God." He visibly shuddered and dropped his head to his chest. "He said those words to me."

Gray frowned and looked aside, debating how he felt about Natsu reliving that past at a time like this. "Do you need to say them?"

Natsu gulped hard. "Maybe," he whispered in guilt. "I wonder sometimes if acting like him would help me to understand him, that way I can get over him."

"Roleplaying as the villain? We should do that someday, but not tonight. I'm not in the right mental state for that. Just us tonight, okay? No more ghosts of the past. Tonight, it's about us being happy that we have a future together."

Natsu nodded and smiled up to Gray. "I still wanna watch."

"Ask like you normally do. Beg me to touch myself."

Natsu lightly licked his lips. "Please, kainushi. Touch yourself for me. I wanna watch you."

Gray fell back, only stroking himself now, rubbing steadily as he felt the buildup returning instantly. Natsu watched, enthralled by the weakly suppressed moans. The water slid down Gray's bulky muscles, getting lost in the wiry crop of sable hair below. Natsu watched Gray's flared pink head vanish and peek back through those fast fingers. Although covered with a pale condom, at least it was transparent latex and he could see the head darkening as Gray got closer and closer to losing control.

"I love to watch you," he purred. "I like to watch your face as you fall apart."

"Shut up. Don't talk." Gray was nearing the breaking point quickly as he heard those deep, devious words.

Natsu chortled with a sadistic smirk. Oh yes, he knew Gray had a slight weakness to dirty talk! For a man who loved to dominate, a few simple words could shatter the ice wizard's resolve, and Natsu knew how to cast that sort of magic over his boyfriend.

"Come for me, Gray," he begged with a groan of desperation to his voice. "I wanna see it, wanna hear your voice turn into an animal, and smell you as your sweat drips over your skin. I love the smell of your cum."

"Shut … up…" Gray panted, but a loud moan drowned out everything else. His face drew up as he neared his climax. "Oh … ooooh God … gonna … haaah…"

"Yes, Gray," Natsu urged. "Yes. Do it. Let me see you come. Let me watch you. I wanna watch. You like when I watch you, right?"

Oh God, yes! He did!

Gray cracked open his eyes to see the Dragon Slayer's fiery gaze fixed on him, the narrow eyes blazing with carnal lust, and the sharp canines bared as if ready to attack and devour him. Just that much, something as simple as Natsu's lascivious face, was enough to completely undo him. Gray arched backward, and he shuddered as his cock surged. The idea that Natsu was watching and ordering him made him enjoy this much more than a quick jerk in the shower.

Natsu gazed with wonder. Gray was so beautiful when he came. That tortured face, the way his whole body tensed all at once, and deep grunting turning into gasps of relief: all of it was breathtaking. Then he gazed down and saw the ballooned tip of the condom fill with spurts of milky whiteness.

Another flashback flitted across his mind.


A condom was held up in front of his face. Tired and horrified, little Natsu could only gaze at it in silence as he panted to catch his breath. The rubber had a small bit of milky liquid on the bottom, and as the man held it up, the condom twisted one way, then the other, showing him that tiny bit of fluid.

"See that, boy? Do you know what this is called? It's semen. This is the seed of life. It's what I want from you. I'm gonna milk it from you every day, like a fucking cow. You'll give me a lot, won't you?"

"I hate you! Don't touch me again or I'll burn your ugly face off."

"Still feisty? You're gonna love the next few weeks, getting a hand job from a professional like me. Consider yourself lucky. You get to experience heaven every day, before I eventually kill you."

"They're gonna come. They'll come, and when Fairy Tail finds you, you're dead. Dead!"

"Oh, don't struggle, boy. Did anyone come when you screamed? No. Because no one knows you're here. Everybody knows you go on long trips looking for that dragon. They know you're gone for weeks at a time. No one will come for you. They'll simply think you found that dragon you're looking for and decided to stay with him. One day, they'll forget you even exist."

"They won't! They … th-they won't…"

"You're probably worn out. That's normal."

"Normal?"

"Don't you know? Aww, was it your first time? Did I steal something from you? How cute! You're a cute boy."

"Don't call me cute! And stop calling me boy, you ugly jerk!"

"Shut up, boy!"

"Owwwww!"

"If you're not good, I'll steal more than just your first cum. If you don't give me what I want, I'll fuck your tiny ass. Give me what I want, and you get to keep your virginity. Aren't I a generous man?"

"Screw you!"

"No, boy. You're the one who will be screwed … every day. By my own hand. And more, if you're bad. You do not want to be a bad boy."

"My … my name … is Natsu Dragneel. Not boy."

"You have no name. You're nothing but a boy with semen in your dick, and I need that seed of life from inside you. That's all you are now. A helpless, cute, little boy filled with cum. Should I show you what you'll be fucked with if you're bad? Take a look at this."

"Aaaaaaaah!"

"This big boy will rip your ass until you shit blood. Next time you do anything bad, I'll ram this down your throat and let you choke on it until you pass out. Think about that as you sleep tonight … boy."


He shivered at that memory. Then Natsu gazed up and saw Gray dripping with water, panting heavily, skin flushed with arousal, and the musky smell of his sweat was everywhere. The seductive view melted the wisps of dark memories. That horrible man was gone, dead. That was in the past. Gray was here now, in the present, and … Natsu wanted Gray with him in the future.

"Oh God, that was too quick," Gray groaned wearily. His plan to rub each other off slowly and erotically was dashed by his own need to release after all the emotional conflicts.

Natsu smirked arrogantly. "Was it that good?"

"Shut up." Gray collapsed back onto the tiles and caught his breath. "So, what are we gonna do with you?"

"Nothing."

"…Whuuuh?"

"I already came once. I'm fine."

"But you're aroused again."

"Yeah. I just wanna be hard. I don't wanna come."

"That again?"

"You can touch me, just don't make me come. I don't want to do that."

Not coming was rebelling against what the man wanted and taking charge of his own body. Not coming empowered him, showed that he was in control, and he would not let others dictate how his body would react. After a week like this that dredged up too many memories, Natsu knew he could not give in to the lust, not like that little boy who had no ability to defend himself or stop the vile touches. He needed to control himself, and this was one way how to do that. It was how he managed back then, shutting himself off, forbidding himself from releasing. This was Natsu's way of confirming to himself that he was the one in control.

"All right," he frowned. Gray had really wanted to watch Natsu experience the same erotic release, but he knew this was something the Dragon Slayer needed. Just as he needed release, Natsu needed restraint. Gray did not really understand it, but he knew this was simply what Natsu needed to fight his demons. "The water will get cold soon, though. Let's get out of the shower. I should … um … wash up, make sure it's clean."

"I'll step out," Natsu offered, leaving the warmth of the water.

"Yeah," Gray muttered, looking down at his condom. "I guess I can't get this near you."

Natsu walked back and stuck his hand into the falling water, caressing Gray's wet face. "Hey, it'll be okay. We don't have to completely abstain for two weeks. We just have to be careful until you get well."

"Yeah. Don't worry. I'll be okay."

Natsu smiled in relief, and then he left to gather his clothes.

Gray slowly pulled off the glove, then the condom, and tied a knot to keep the semen inside. He placed the condom inside the glove for more protection and tossed it in the trash by the toilet. He scrubbed his body well, cleaning away the disease that resided somewhere on his skin. He frowned down at his penis, now limp and shrunken with the foreskin hiding it away.

"You got me in a lot of trouble," he mumbled to the member.

"Did you say something, Gray?" Natsu shouted from the bedroom.

"I wanna eat tacos," he shouted in a panic.

"That's a weird craving. Are you pregnant or something?"

Gray remembered that dream again and Natsu saying "I want to make you pregnant." He wondered if that sort of mentality would help Natsu overcome his phobia. It had to be something Natsu himself came up with, though. Telling him to think with that mentality would not work at all. Natsu had to want it.

But … maybe someday. Gray wanted that particular dream to come true. Even if it meant being the bottom, that was fine, so long as it was Natsu gazing down at him and whispering "I love you."

Chapter Text

Gray woke up to heat on his groin. It felt comforting, erotic. Then he realized he was still sick with gonorrhea, and heat like this could only come from one person.

"Natsu!" he cried out in a jolt of horror.

He looked down, and in the early morning light he saw the Dragon Slayer with his mouth down at his groin. However, the fear that Natsu might do something to make himself sick was alleviated when Gray realized they were both still wearing boxer shorts, and Natsu had kept the sheet over Gray's body. He was kissing Gray's morning erection through the sheet.

"What the…?"

Lustful green eyes turn up to him, and Gray shivered at their hungry gleam. They were eyes that threatened to devour him.

"Natsu … you … you shouldn't."

In reply, Natsu leaned over and lightly took the cloth-covered cock between his teeth, giving Gray a firm but not painful bite. "Mine," he declared possessively. Then Natsu exhaled into the sheet, and Gray felt moist heat dampen the cotton boxers.

"Oh … God, Natsu." Gray fisted up the sheet under him. It felt so … damn … good.

"Heh," Natsu chuckled softly. "You're sensitive in the morning."

"Of course I am."

Natsu happily kept mouthing kisses and nips up and down the tented sheet. "I like it," he murmured.

Gray leaned back, letting him have his fun. He recalled going to a restaurant and eating tacos last night, but the rest of the evening was a blur. "Did you really stay the night?"

"Yup," Natsu murmured through kisses. "You drank a bunch of iced margaritas until you stripped out of your clothes and began dancing on a table. The restaurant kicked us out. I got you dressed, but you passed out on the way home. I carried you back, and I decided to stay here. I miss your bed."

"But Happy…"

"Happy's pretty intuitive when it comes to relationships. He can probably figure it out. I'll make it up to him later. Right now, I want you." He took the head of the penis into his mouth, still shielded by boxers and a sheet.

"Oh God, Natsu," groaned Gray. His hips instinctively thrust toward that warmth. This was so dangerous … and so delicious!

Natsu smiled languidly while still stroking through the sheets. "Hey Gray, as soon as you're well, I wanna suck you off."

Although erotic, memories flashed through Gray's mind and clouded him with repulsive realization that the last time Natsu did that, Gray had put him in so much danger of getting sick.

Natsu raised up and straddled over Gray, leering down at him. "I knew it! You want to think that last time was somehow bad. I know you liked it, so why do you cringe every time my face even gets near your groin?"

"You know very well why!" Gray snapped quietly, looking aside since having Natsu on top of him like this was embarrassing and making him think lewd things. "I could have made you sick."

"Any one of our times together could have infected me."

"That was the only time I … that I … when … my cum … entered you," he said, feeling awkward.

"And I liked it."

Gray flinched and looked further away. "Natsu…"

The Dragon Slayer grabbed Gray's jaw and forcefully yanked his face back. "Listen up, bastard. I … liked … it. Sure, I could've gotten sick, but I didn't. That infection is on your skin; I could have caught it from the very beginning. I didn't! So stop hating yourself for something that didn't even happen."

Gray tried to push that hot body away, wanting to escape and wallow in his misery at putting Natsu in such a risky situation to begin with. Natsu grabbed Gray's arms and slammed them against the headboard. The aggressive and dominating move shocked Gray so much, he forgot about struggling. He gawked up at the Dragon Slayer.

"I think I know what I'm going to do to you when you're well," Natsu smirked. "Wanna hear my plan?"

Gray was still too stunned to say anything. He just stared at this man who had captured him and pinned him down.

"First of all, I'm going to borrow your handcuffs. This time, I'm cuffing you," Natsu smirked. He saw Gray's eyes get even larger. "Then I'll force you to fuck my throat. That's right! I'll rape you with my mouth." His eyes gleaming hungrily. "You'll be tied up, can't stop me, and I won't stop even if you use a safeword. Totally … helpless." His words went softer, darker, as his eyes narrowed fiercely. "Can't move. Can't stop the touches. I won't listen to your screams. I'll force that cum out of you," he growled.

In Natsu's words, Gray heard the faint hints of a strange accent, the same as last night. Was he repeating things once said to him? Had that man in the past really threatened a child like this?

He remembered Natsu said he thought he needed to roleplay the villain. Although utterly unexpected, the Dragon Slayer had apparently slipped into the role. Gray wanted to help Natsu, so he decided he would play along. He would be the victim, and Natsu would be the attacker. He would lie here in bed and be the helpless one. Maybe—hopefully—Natsu could work through a few of his issues if he put himself in the role of the man who hurt him so deeply.

"You'll come for me," Natsu sneered, reaching down and stroking Gray's shaft. "You won't be able to stop. Doesn't matter if you scream. I'll keep at it until you burst, until it all comes out, and I'll take every damn drop. You'll give me a lot, won't you … boy?"

Gray shuddered in horror. Words like this … these words were said to Natsu. Some sadistic, vile, wretched man had said these words to Natsu when he was barely old enough to even produce semen. It made Gray sick, and being the victim like this terrified him.

"N-no," Gray muttered.

He pictured himself as the child, a little boy locked away, far from any help, tied up, defenseless, with a sadistic molester dominating over him. His skin prickled as he suddenly felt lost and tiny, weak and degraded, just from the words and the touches.

"I'll milk you like a fucking cow. If you don't give it to me, I'll suck it out. One way or another, boy, you're gonna give me what I want."

Gray's heart raced. It might just be roleplay, but this was a scenario out of a nightmare.

"Will you be a good boy this time?" Natsu asked with a sadistic chuckle deep in his throat. "Will you come for me like I want? Maybe you need help. Is that it? Are my hands no good anymore? I have things that could help you."

Natsu rose off the bed, and Gray did not move. He was trapped in the fantasy, being the victim, being helpless. It was like he was Natsu, a childish Natsu, imprisoned and hearing these threats. This was what Natsu experienced in the past. Those were words he must have heard. The threats and disgusting words were spouted at him for days … weeks! He had endured mental and physical torture for so long, and being so young.

To Gray's surprise, Natsu walked to the chest of kinky goodies and returned with a masturbation sleeve, lube, and gloves. "What the…? Na-…"

"Shut up!" Natsu snapped before he could hear his own name and be pulled out of the fantasy. "Time to work you up again, boy."

"You said we'd wait," he shouted.

"Did I?" Natsu smirked cruelly. "I lied. Every day, boy. Every fucking day."

"Every … day?" he asked, confused until it dawned on him.

This scenario had not just happened once to Natsu. He had been subjected to it every day, and according to his earlier recount, sometimes the man did this a few times a day, taking as much semen as Natsu's tiny body could produce. Gray cringed, starting to fully comprehend the horror Natsu had lived through.

A low, vile chortle shook Natsu's chest as he pulled on the gloves. Gray had seen just last night how Natsu reacted to latex gloves. He must have fully immersed himself in this fantasy to overcome a fear like that. Gray felt his body shaking with vicarious terror, but he allowed Natsu to have this fantasy. Yesterday was a real regression in the steps Natsu had been making at getting better. Maybe he needed this to move forward again.

Still, knowing this scenario was what Natsu had actually experienced made Gray want to cry. Tears of pity gathered in his eyes. Natsu—his Natsu—had been violated just like this.

"Are you crying again, boy?" Natsu asked mockingly. "You know tears don't work on me. Scream if you want. Scream until your throat bleeds again. It didn't work last time, did it?"

Last time? Had Natsu done that, then? Had he screamed for help until he tore his throat up with his shrieks, desperate pleas that no one ever heard, only that sadistic man who probably just laughed at him? He must have screamed and cried for days. Did he ever just give in? Was there ever a point where Natsu broke and just let the man do what he wanted? How long could a child have lasted before breaking?

Sadly, Gray knew the other truth to this story. When at last Natsu broke, he did not give in. He had not surrendered to the man's touches. He went completely psychopathic and ripped the man's head off with his bare hands. Just how much did a person have to endure before they plummeted to that level?

Natsu had the gloves on and drizzled lube on the vagina-shaped opening of the sleeve's canister. At least he had some sense to protect himself with the gloves, otherwise Gray would have ended this scene right away, before Natsu could touch him and infect his skin. Natsu pulled Gray's boxers down. He wished he could say that this was erotic, but the truth was that Gray was limp, shocked and sickened by the knowledge that they were acting out the darkest moments of Natsu's childhood.

"Not even a little aroused this time, boy?"

How could he be aroused? How could he possibly get turned on when he felt like this?

He also now fully understood why Natsu could not stand to be called boy. Dear God, that was getting to be annoying, not to mention utterly degrading, constantly reminding him of his inferior status.

"That's fine. You get hard so quickly."

Natsu took Gray's limp member into the gloved hand and stroked it. The feel of that latex was weird against his skin, unnatural, synthetic. Gray cringed as he realized just why Natsu might come to hate the feel, especially associating it with something like this man.

"Here we go. You'll get hard for me again, won't you, boy? A cute, horny, semen-slave, that's what you are."

Cute? Slave? So that was why Natsu also hated to be called cute and refused to do slave/master roleplay.

Gray shuddered and tried to pull away. He could end this; he knew that. His hands were not even restrained, although he had not moved them from where Natsu had slammed them up against the headboard with such roughness. All he had to do was call out Natsu's name, and he would probably shatter this sick delusion.

However, this was what Natsu needed. He was trying to work through a labyrinth of disgusting perversions that, as a child, he could not even begin to comprehend. Maybe now that Natsu was an adult, working with someone he trusted explicitly, he might begin to heal. So although Gray potently felt the fantasy of being violated, and although the words Natsu hissed into his ear were highly disturbing, he did not do more than whimper and shake his hips to pull away from Natsu's touches. He would probably have nightmares about this later, but for now he wanted to help Natsu get out of being trapped in the past. He wanted to yank Natsu into the light of the present, so that maybe the Dragon Slayer could finally see the potential of that bright future Gray wanted, a future for the two of them, where they could be happy, love one another fully, and boldly declare that love.

For that to happen, first they had to work through Natsu's darkness. This was one way for him to get over the past: by reliving it in reverse roleplay. Gray gulped down sickness and struggled through the delusion of being a molested child, trapped for weeks, forced to endure so much. He looked at the dark delight in Natsu's face, and he began to wonder the same thing Natsu had said yesterday.

Was this worth it?

Their relationship, although wonderful and sensual, constantly brought up memories of the past for Natsu. He could hardly go ten minutes without flinching. Each of those flinches were flashbacks. That meant Natsu was constantly reliving this nightmare. He was hearing that man's voice in his head. He kept recalling those vile touches. Even in their most intimate and private moments, the ghost of that molester haunted Natsu's memories, ruining his happiness.

Was this worth it?

Was a relationship with Gray worth dredging up so much scum from the past? Was it better to just abstain from sex and hide from the horrors?

Gray began to wonder about this himself. Was it worth putting Natsu through such a hellish memory just to satisfy his own pleasure? He wanted to protect Natsu, to shield him from all sadness. Was sex maybe not a good thing for the Dragon Slayer?

"See, you wiggle away, but you're hard again. When you get like this, it means you actually like it. You're one horny boy, liking it so much, getting hard day after day."

Day after day … Natsu had been subjected to this humiliation again and again … until he broke. Until his grasp on sanity snapped. Until he changed from the Natsu that Gray loved so much, into some murderous insane child reveling in the blood of his foe.

"Are you ready? Of course you are. This hard cock of yours is your body's way of saying you're ready."

"No," Gray cringed. That was so, so wrong! To tell anyone that arousal meant they wanted sex was disgusting.

Natsu glared at him, but those eyes were not his. There was a cruel gleam to them. "You're gonna give me what I want, boy. Whether you want it or not, you're gonna give me your precious cum. Don't worry. This is my own personal toy, brought it just for you. I'm sharing my toys, see?"

"Sharing?" Gray cringed. Oh God, had that bastard used his own sex toys on Natsu? All the possible bacteria and…

And viruses…

No wonder Natsu felt dirty and hated sex toys. There was a very good chance he actually had contracted a sexually transmitted disease during this ordeal but was too insane to realize the medication he was on was for something else. Of course, no one would have explained it to him. Only Makarov and Gildarts would know the full truth.

Natsu twisted the end cap on the masturbation sleeve. As he slid Gray's penis in, the air seeped out the opened cap. Gray groaned softly as the realistic feel of a woman's vagina enshrouded him. His hips naturally wanted to thrust up into it, except … it was cold. Natsu was so warm inside. Real women were warm, too. Natsu had not bothered to warm up the toy, although he could have applied heat easily. Of course, that was only a trick of the Fire Dragon Slayer. Right now, Natsu was in the role of some sick bastard of his past who probably did not care about Natsu's comfort.

"Feels good, right?"

It honestly did. Gray had to look up at Natsu to reaffirm in his mind that this could be sexy, not traumatizing. This was Natsu, and he was about to get Gray off with a toy the ice wizard had used many times on his lonely nights.

Then Natsu twisted the cap shut again. Gray wondered why he did that. It was standard to loosen the cap. As the penis went in, the air had to escape somehow. However, he usually left the lid loosened—still on, so his semen did not go shooting out everywhere, but loose so the air flowed in and out. Why was Natsu tightening it again?

Then as Natsu pulled the masturbation sleeve back up, Gray realized there was a hell of a lot more suction. He did not even have to slide Gray all the way to the front again; just a little was intense. How the hell did he learn this technique?

An instant later, Gray wanted to vomit as he realized just how Natsu must have learned.

"You like this, don't you, my little semen slave? Feels good, eh? This is what a real woman feels like. Silky smooth inside, right? Give her what she wants, boy? Women want to pleasure us men. Let her pleasure you."

Gray tensed up. Although he realized this could be sexy in any other setting, for now it was too disturbing. He wanted the scene to be over with quickly, so he did not even bother trying to hold himself back. He panted as Natsu thrust the toy on him, rubbing up and down his shaft, and those smooth walls stroked him, suctioning him, drawing him closer to the edge. He wondered, would Natsu have held out from a sense of pride, or would he have given in quickly to get the ordeal over with that much sooner? How would Natsu handle this?

Stubbornly! He would not want to obey this man's orders at all.

"Come for me, boy."

He wouldn't follow that. He wouldn't want…

…to come. He would rather deny himself all pleasure than to surrender.

Gray jolted as he suddenly fully comprehended Natsu's penchant for orgasm denial.

Not coming was keeping in control. In a situation like this, the only thing Natsu could control was his own body's reactions. The only way he could fight … was by not coming.

So although Gray wanted the scene to end, he also held back. He felt he owed it to Natsu. He wanted to experience all the horrors his poor boyfriend had lived through. He wanted to understand Natsu more and more.

"Aren't you coming yet? I don't have all day, y'know. You want to pop, don't you? A disgusting little pimple, wanting to pop, needing the filth drained. I'm just going to pop you, boy. Just gonna get the cum out of you."

Gray recalled something Natsu once shouted, and he said the same words, feeling them sink into his soul. "Don't pop it."

"Then give it to me, you little semen slave. Give me your cum."

"Like hell I will," Gray sneered.

"Oh you will, boy. You'll have no choice."

Gray realized, he did have a choice. He could hold back. His lower stomach muscles steeled themselves. He forced his mind elsewhere. He would hold back as long as possible.

"You disgusting little pimple! Why won't you pop? Squeeze and squeeze, but you don't pop."

Suddenly, burning hot hands clutched Gray's throat and tightened. He gagged, stunned at the attack.

"What if I squeeze here, huh?" Natsu shouted angrily. "Will the pimple pop then? Did you know that cutting off your air can give you an erection? Or it'll kill you. If you don't do what I say, you're no use to me anyway."

The hands squeezed, crushing his windpipe. Gray really could not inhale. Natsu was going to choke him into unconsciousness.

He suddenly recalled early on in their relationship, Natsu crying out, 'You'll never choke me, right?' He remembered Natsu's story from the past, how not only had the abductors of his early childhood choked him, but the molester did as well. This was how he had suffered. This was why he had issues with touches to his neck when he was in his panic attacks. That man had tried to strangle Natsu to death, all on the hope that he would get one last shot of sperm.

Slowly, Gray realized he was not defenseless. He was not even tied up. As his face began to go numb, Gray slowly brought his hands away from the headboard.

"Do you like that, boy? Is it making you aroused yet? I'm gonna make you come, boy. One way or another, I'm gonna get what I want. I'll pop this pimple … or squeeze your fucking head off trying."

Black spots dotted Gray's vision, but he slammed both fists down onto Natsu's shoulders. The hands loosened, and air rushed back into Gray's lungs with a gasp.

"Red!" Gray bellowed, coughing and rubbing out his throat. "Holy shit, Natsu!"

At that name, those green eyes widened. The delusion shattered, and Natsu gazed upon Gray with the full horror of realizing what he had just done. "Gray!" he screamed, and flung his arms around the ice wizard. "Oh my God, I am so sorry. I didn't mean to…"

"I'm fine," Gray snapped, pushing him aside. He knew the roleplay was over, but it was hard to stop feeling a bit of hatred. "Don't touch me!"

He slammed his eyes shut as he realized Natsu had said those same words so many times. 'Don't touch me, you sick bastard!'

"My God, Natsu."

Gray suddenly grabbed the stunned Dragon Slayer and crushed him into a hug. He began to sob, stroking Natsu's pink hair, wishing he could take all those memories of horror out of his poor lover's mind and free him from the chains of the past.

"Did I hurt you that badly?" Natsu asked in dread.

"No. I'm fine. I … I can't believe you went through something like that. I knew that man had hurt you but … oh God, I didn't realize just how horrible it must have been." Gray shuddered as the sickness of the crime weighed down on him. "How could you have put up with that for so long?"

"I had no other choice," Natsu admitted quietly. "It was either that or kill myself … and I was tempted more than once to do just that."

Gray squeezed him even tighter, jolting with sobs. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. Oh God, that was awful."

"I'm sorry, Gray," he muttered sadly.

"No! No, you needed this. We both did. I didn't understand you. Now, I think … I really understand a hell of a lot more about you after seeing it from your perspective." His eyes had been opened to the full horror of the truth, and now he would never see Natsu the same again. Still, he had gotten a glimpse of the truth that haunted Natsu. "Did he really do all that to you?"

Natsu could not meet his gaze. "Those were things he said … and did … at different times. But yeah, he said all of those things … and a lot worse."

Worse? Gray was not sure if he even wanted to imagine how much worse it could have been. "I'm surprised you're even able to let me touch you at all."

"I've had time to get over it," Natsu muttered. "And a lot of therapy," he added.

"I hope this helped," Gray said, removing the sleeve from his limp cock and setting it aside. He did not at all feel like having sex now, not after that sort of scare.

"I think it did," Natsu pouted. "Only, now I'm even more scared that I might attack you one day. That's why I need to be tied up. I'm afraid I won't pull out of a flashback and … and I'll kill you one day."

"But that one time at your house, in your shower…"

"I came so fast, I didn't have time to slip into the past. Otherwise, I need it. If you're going to take your time, I'll probably remember something, even if I don't want to, and … like you attacked me just now. I … I attacked him at the exact same point, only … I didn't just hit him away," he muttered, paling as he remembered what he actually had done. "He was choking me, so … I broke out of the ropes tying me down and … and I began to choke him back. He always had a knife to my throat—always—but when his hands were on my neck, he set the knife down. It was an opening, and I seized. I went for his throat. We wrestled. I squeezed, and I kept squeezing, and then … I wanted more. I wanted him dead, so I … I began pulling instead of squeezing. Pulling and pulling. I felt the bones pop in his neck. I watched the skin stretch, and then tear … until … until…" Natsu broke into tears. "I killed him. I ripped his head off. Just pulled it right off his body. The blood was … everywhere. And … and then I…" Natsu choked to muteness in thick, shaking sobs.

Gray pulled Natsu up against his chest. "Maybe this doesn't help, but if someone did all that to me, I'd want to kill him, too."

Natsu looked up with thick tears in his eyes. "Did you want to kill me?"

"I want to kill the man who did that to you. I wish you could have left him alive, so I could be the one to kill him. However, if he deserved to die at all, it was by your hands. You had every reason to want him dead."

"I still feel bad that I killed him."

"That's because you're a good guy deep down inside. You're a wizard of Fairy Tail, and Igneel raised you to protect others, not to go out on slaughtering sprees."

Natsu sniffed moistly. "Igneel told me to only hurt people who hurt my nakama. He'd be mad if he found out I did that."

"No, I honestly think he would have killed that man. You told me that when you were really young and got abducted, Igneel burned the bandits' hideout to the ground. He totally would have roasted that pervert."

Natsu let out a weak laugh. "Yeah, he burned up those bad guys really bad."

"Because they hurt the person he loved most: you. Igneel would have blasted his hottest flames on that damn bastard for torturing you. Hell, I'd freeze his blood solid if he was still around."

"Maybe it's a good thing he's not. I don't want you to be a killer like me."

"You were defending yourself," Gray argued.

Natsu glared up, anger and sadness in his eyes, and darkly whispered, "I did a lot worse than simply defend myself."

"He made you like that. He drove you insane. It's his fault."

"That's what my therapist used to tell me," he grumbled petulantly.

"Because it's true. Look, I don't blame you one bit for lashing out at that bastard." Gray stroked Natsu's hair. "I just want to bring you out of the shadow of that past."

Natsu cuddled wearily down into his chest. "I feel like I'm dragging you into my shadow."

"The best way to bring someone out of a dark cave is to climb down into the cave until you can reach their hand. I saw a glimpse just now of how dark your cave is. Maybe now I can pull you out."

Natsu clutched tightly to him. "You've been pulling me up by the hand since the beginning, idiot."

Gray smiled and stroked Natsu's neck. "I'll have to tie you up in order to haul your ass out."

"You like hauling my ass, don't you?" Natsu smirked playfully.

"I love anything to do with your ass," Gray teased back, reaching down and pinching Natsu's rump. "I also happen to love tying you up. Don't forget, that's my own little kink. I love restraining you, so if you need to feel secure by being immobilized, that's totally fine with me. I'll cuff you, tie you, ice you, anything you need, because I get aroused seeing you helpless and being in total control over you."

"Control freak!"

"Masochist!"

They laid together on the bed, holding one another, not saying anything more, not really looking at anything, just letting the moment slowly drift away. Gray let himself think about all Natsu had said and done. He thought about his own reactions, and he shivered to think Natsu experienced that. More than ever, he wanted to pull this Dragon Slayer out of his cave. Only then would he truly be able to see Natsu fly.

"Gray," Natsu mumbled. "Did I hurt you?"

"I might have some bruising on my neck, but it doesn't hurt at all." That was not totally true, but Gray knew the lingering pain of Natsu's choke-hold would be gone by morning.

"That's good. Did … did I scare you?"

Gray hesitated to answer, but he had to be honest this time. "It was scary knowing you went through that. I wasn't scared of you, but of imagining how you must have felt during that time. I felt how terrified a child must have been."

"Then were you imagining it, too?"

"I was trying to picture myself as you."

"Scary, huh?" Natsu asked.

"Yeah. Damn scary."

Gray ran his fingers across Natsu's neck. That man had tried to choke him, and that was what finally pushed Natsu over the edge of sanity. After weeks of utter humiliation, the fear of dying—and who knows what that disgusting man might do to a dead body—made Natsu snap. Gray propped himself up, leaned over, and kissed Natsu's neck. He planted a soft yet firm kiss onto the hot skin and gazed down in those narrow eyes.

"I'm going to protect you from now on. If anyone dares to hurt you like that, I'll be the one to kill them."

Natsu blinked in surprise. Then he looked aside while blushing. "Idiot. I'm a lot stronger now. I can protect myself."

Gray traced the flushed cheeks with his fingers. "I'll still protect you, because I care about you. I won't let you go through darkness again, or if you do, I'll be right there beside you. Between fire and ice, nobody stands a chance."

Natsu chuckled softly, and the worries in his face faded away. "If we could do a Unison Raid, can you imagine how awesome that would be?"

"We should totally try it."

"We should convince Erza and Lucy to go on a big mission so we can give it a shot."

"As soon as I'm done with my treatment. I don't want to be on a long mission and end up skipping a dose. I want this stupid bacteria gone." Then he realized something. "You're still wearing gloves. Are you okay with those?"

"To be honest, I've been trying my hardest not to think about them. Can you take them off for me? Rubber gloves really creep me out."

They got out of bed and walked to the bathroom. Gray took the masturbation sleeve with him. He still had lube slathered on his groin and needed to shower. First he pulled the gloves off of Natsu's hands while the Dragon Slayer cringed at the sound. Then he washed the sleeve with hot water and alcohol while Natsu disinfected his hands, just in case.

"Sorry I used your toy," Natsu muttered, glaring at the erotic vagina-shaped item.

"It's fine. It helped you a bit, right?"

"I still can't use one of those. No way!"

"I totally understand," Gray assured him. He was not so sure he would be able to use this item anytime soon either.

"Do you … um … need help?" Natsu asked, offered with a timid shrug.

Gray looked down to the limp member. "Part of me wants to, just to get it out of my system. Part of me … I realize now why you don't want to come," he muttered. "For a moment there, I didn't want to either. I didn't want to … to give in, give up control." Gray gazed up with worry tightening his brow. "Is that how you feel?"

Natsu frowned with guilt. "Yeah," he whispered, realized his own darkness had partially spread to Gray.

Just as Gray could freeze his nightmares and shatter them, Natsu decided he would burn away Gray's hesitancy. He walked forward and ran his hot hands over Gray's torso, slid up to his chest, and stroked around the shoulder until he reached Gray's neck. Then he lightly stroked his nails down Gray's chest and abdomen, not hard enough to mark it, but a tease of what he could do.

"I really want to watch you," he whispered as seductively as he could. "I won't touch. I won't even be in the shower with you, since it'd tempt us. I'll sit on the toilet. Leave the shower curtain open and let me watch. I love to watch you dripping wet and losing yourself to pleasure. I like to listen to you moan and gasp. I want to watch you touch yourself until you come."

By the time Natsu finished speaking, Gray was instantly aroused. Natsu punctuated his request with a slight lick to his lips. Gray gulped and hurriedly turned on the water. It was not even warm, but he did not mind. He jumped in, letting himself get wet. Natsu took a seat on the toilet and gazed hungrily.

"Show me," Natsu demanded. "Entertain me."

Gray shuddered at the forceful voice. He stroked his body first. This was his way of warming up. He ran his hands down his chest and stomach, then up his thighs. He reached up and tweaked his nipples, twisting the nub between his fingers.

"Yes," Natsu hissed.

Gray opened his eyes. "Wanna do at least that much?"

"I just want to watch."

"But I want your hot mouth on me. My chest is safe."

Natsu stood, and Gray saw he was aroused already. Natsu walked over to the shower, and Gray walked forward out of the water. Natsu licked up cold drips, tasting Gray's sweat amidst the water. Gray reached down and cupped himself while Natsu's tongue lapped across his nipple.

"Suck me there," Gray huffed.

Natsu leaned over to suckle the tiny tit. Gray felt that burning mouth on him, the heat spreading through his body, all of it stampeding down to his groin. He grabbed himself and began to stroke.

"Other one, too," he hissed.

Natsu released that nipple, licked a path across Gray's chest, and lapped up his left nipple. His hands caressed Gray's shoulders, and he could feel the movement of his arm. Glancing down, he saw Gray's wrist stroking himself, that flushed head appearing and disappearing into his pale fingers. So sexy! He grabbed the left nipple between his teeth and bit.

"Arrrgh!" Gray cried out.

Natsu raised up and leaned into Gray's ear. "I want to bite you."

"No," Gray frowned. He wanted it too, but he had that infection. He could not chance Natsu getting sick through his blood. "Or … do something else." Gray held up his free hand. "Suck on my fingers."

Natsu raised his eyebrow in amusement.

"I want to feel you suck me … so much," he admitted. "We can't do that yet, so … suck my fingers. Don't bite them, though. Just … suck. I want to feel the inside of your mouth."

Natsu smirked, sat on the edge of the bathtub, and pulled Gray's hand up to him. First, Natsu kissed each knuckle, letting his lips suck the roughened skin. He turned the hand over and traced the lines in his palm.

"You have a strong heart line," Natsu stated.

"Since when did you learn palm reading?"

"From Cana. She tried to read my palm once. She couldn't make much of anything out of it. Maybe it's a Dragon Slayer thing, because she apparently couldn't easily read Gajeel's palm either. Or she just sucks at palm reading. I only know that this is your life line, this is your fate line, this is your head line, and this," he said, tracing his tongue over a crease that crossed Gray's palm, "is your heart line."

Natsu kissed the tips of each finger, then lightly ran his tongue across each one. Gray moaned, and his wrist got busy again. Then Natsu gazed up at Gray with a devious gleam in his eyes. Oh, he knew just how to undo this cold man!

Natsu sucked on his own index finger. Gray watched, enthralled but curious what the Dragon Slayer had in mind. Then Natsu lifted Gray's hand. He slowly traced his wet finger along Gray's palm, following what he recalled was the life line. It was a wide curve, yet many breaks. Cana had mentioned the same about Natsu's life line. It meant he had a lot of vitality, but he would experience many abrupt changes in his lifestyle. Well, nothing surprising about that! He was a wizard of Fairy Tail, after all. Abrupt changes happened weekly.

His finger traced up to the webbing between Gray's thumb and index finger. Natsu's wet finger slid between the two fingers. Then he suddenly clasped Gray's hand closed. Rather than his fingers being casually spread, now they were tightly together.

"This is what I want to do to your ass," he purred, and Natsu slid his wet finger between the tight space of the thumb and index finger.

Gray gasped, and his eyes widened. He had thought Natsu would just drool over his hand a bit. Instead, the damn Dragon Slayer was toying with him … and driving him crazy.

"I want to touch inside you, Gray," Natsu groaned, forcing his finger to rub in and out. "I want to feel your insides warm up to me."

Gray collapsed backward against the tiles of the bathtub. "Oh God," he moaned, stroking faster.

"But more than that. I want to taste you." He brought the hand up to his face, making sure to press the fingers together tightly, and thrust his tongue between the thumb's webbing.

Gray jolted. Did Natsu really want to try rimming? No man had ever done that to Gray, and he could only imagine how that burning tongue might feel, lapping up his hole and thrusting into his ass. Dear God, he was not going to last long at all!

"Natsu," he warned. "Fingers!"

The Dragon Slayer kissed over the knuckles of both the index and middle fingers, gently folding the others down. His wet finger still wiggled around his thumb webbing as Natsu finally licked the tips of Gray's fingers, swirling his tongue around them, before plunging down, taking his fingers all the way to the bottom knuckles. Slowly, he sucked up and ran his tongue over the fingers again.

"I wanna suck you." Natsu bobbed his head on the fingers, sliding them in and out of the mouth and licking his tongue across the rough skin. "Taste you," he groaned, lapping more and sucking sensually slow. "Swallow you deep down into my throat." He devoured the fingers again, up to the knuckles, until Gray could feel the fleshy uvula hanging down.

"Oh shit, Natsu," he panted. He was so close … so close…

Those narrow eyes gleamed up, the fingers still in his mouth, so erotic that Gray was utterly overwhelmed. He pulled off slowly, and he let those fingers drag over his bottom lip, pulling out. Then he rubbed Gray's fingers around his moistened lips, sensually licking them as Gray ringed his mouth.

"I want you to come in my mouth," he whispered. "I want to swallow it down. I want that taste all over my tongue." He lapped up the fingers again.

"D-Dammit … Natsu…" Gray's back arched.

Natsu sucked the fingertips again and moaned heatedly. "Gimme what I want, Gray!" Then he thrust down onto his fingers and sucked hard.

Gray cried out. As easy as that, he came, barely realizing he needed to aim it away from Natsu. Natsu at least had enough sense to pull the shower curtain over as a shield against the semen. Gray shot against the curtain instead, and pale cum dripped down the plastic lining.

"Dear God, you're too much for me," Gray moaned.

Natsu popped the fingers out and gazed up to Gray. "It wasn't enough, though. I want more!" He stood and walked into the shower.

Gray panicked. "Natsu! No, you can't. I…"

"Don't touch me," he said gruffly. He roughly flipped Gray around, so the semen-soaked groin would not be near him, and then he crashed Gray's chest up against the shower wall. Natsu took Gray's wrists and held them, pinning him against the wall.

"N-Natsu…?"

"I want you so badly, Gray," he growled.

Suddenly, the ice wizard felt a stiff pole ram against the upper crack of his ass, then rub up toward the base of his spine. Natsu was humping himself against Gray's low back! The thought of Natsu dominating made Gray shiver. As much as he liked restraining others and taking all control away from them, thinking about switching that role with Natsu made him groan softly.

"God, I wanna fuck you," Natsu sneered, just a hint of a whining protest in his voice.

Gray's eyes went huge, and he tried to look around his shoulder. "Natsu?" Was this really him, or was this another flashback?

"I want to feel inside you, Gray."

A growl like that was definitely the Dragon Slayer!

"I want to thrust into your body. I want to mark you, scratch you, bite you, lick up your blood, and take you fully as my mate." He pressed Gray flat against the wall and leaned into his ear. "I want to ravage you … so hard!"

Gray lost the air in his lungs. 'Oh shit, he's getting me turned on all over again.'

Natsu slid his cock between Gray's butt cheeks and up to his tailbone, pressing his own body tight to increase the feel of friction. He thrust again and again, stroking himself up against the cold, wet, slippery skin.

"Oh God, Natsu," Gray shuddered. Yesterday, Natsu had regressed so much, almost back to how he was at the beginning, needing a rape fantasy to release. Now…

Gray smiled to himself as he felt the aggression in those thrusts. Doing that roleplay must have really helped Natsu if he was able to be this assertive in his desires. It might have been a bit scary and depressing to know Natsu had gone through such a horrific experience, but seeing a glimpse of that darkness was worth the mental anguish if it meant Natsu could take such a huge step forward.

"It's not inside," Natsu said softly to himself. "It's not in anything."

Gray heard his low muttering. Despite wanting to dominate, Natsu still had his issues. "Shoot it into the sewers. Your cum isn't good for anything. No one will want it once it hits the sewers. Just a drop of filth floating amidst the shit of a thousand asses."

Natsu gasped as he thought about how liberating that sounded. Yes, if his cum was in filth, it was unusable. No one would want it. No one could use it.


" What is this? You missed the cup, you damn boy. And you pissed all over the floor. Your cum is in the middle of piss. I can't use it now. Fucking kid! I need fresh cum, not cum that's sitting in filth. Goddammit. A wasted effort. Damn fucking sonuvabitch…"


Natsu forced the rest of the memory aside. He had been beaten into a bloody mess for wasting his semen, yet that moment had felt like a victory. He might have given in to the physical sensation, but he had denied his captor the victory of collecting his sperm. It was the only victory he had up until his body learned to shut itself down and refuse to ejaculate.

"Gray," he whispered huskily. "Ice my feet, right where they are, and…" He grabbed Gray's hands and weaved his fingers between the ice wizard's fingers, holding on tightly. "…and ice our hands together. I want to see if this works."

"Okay," Gray nodded, panting breathlessly, caught up in the moment. "Wrap your fingers in mine. Hold onto me."

He felt Natsu squeeze his hands, already shivering with the inner fear of his past violence. Gray could not use hand seals to cast the ice, but it was just a little frost, enough to trap Natsu's feet to the bottom of the shower and to freeze their hands together.

"Ah! It's cold!" Natsu cried as the ice encased his feet up to his ankles, and a glove of ice frosted over his hands and wrists. He could still move his arms freely, but Gray was bound up with him, their hands joined. He still felt the cold but strong fingers gripping him.

"Just keep holding my hands," Gray said in gentle encouragement. "Hold onto me, like this, frozen together."

"Yesss! Can't hurt you. Can't attack you." Natsu sped up thrusting with his hips, humping against Gray's back. "One day, Gray. One day, I'll be able to do this for real. I'll mark you inside. I'll claim you. I'll ravage you from behind."

"God, I want that, Natsu!" Gray whispered with a shudder.

Gray moaned as he thought about a day when they could easily take turns. He would tie Natsu up and work him out, giving him the pleasure of erotic pain, and then he would release his captive dragon and let him wildly rampage all the aggression out of his system.

He heard Natsu gasp, and he felt that hot body start to pull away. He must be very close, and the fear of giving in was back.

"Natsu! Shoot it into the sewer," Gray ordered, hoping to keep him in the present moment. He felt Natsu's wet hair shaking back and forth, straining against his fears. "Into the sewer, you damn dragon!"

Natsu gulped hard. He had to trust Gray. Gray was helping him to waste the cum. It was not in anything. It would flow straight into the drain, down to the sewers. Gray wanted it to be a piece of filth. He would not collect it. He did not want it. Gray … just wanted him.

He remembered Gray's words one day. "A few drops of fluid aren't interesting to me. It's watching you build up to that moment of release, watching you be aroused, listening to you whimper and cry. Not your cum, but your pleasure, and I'll milk that out any way I can."

Natsu wanted to show Gray how much the ice wizard pleasured him. He wanted to indulge in that pleasure, and to return it in full. He wanted—so much—to be equals in this sort of pleasuring. At least for now, this was the best he could do. He thrust himself up against Gray, moaning and panting right into Gray's ear so the ice wizard could hear how much pleasure this was giving him, and he smelled arousal in that icy body. Even if all he was doing was thrusting against Gray's back, this was exciting his lover as well.

"G-Gray…" Natsu gnashed. His mouth grabbed Gray's shoulder.

"Don't make me bleed!" he shouted in a panic. "You can bite, but don't make me bleed."

Natsu snarled in vexation. "I want you to bleed. Wanna taste it."

"Not this time, Natsu. That's an order. Don't … make … me … bleed."

Natsu growled in frustration, but the biting did not get harder. It still hurt … so good! Within the icy barrier around his hands, Gray felt Natsu's fingers clench, and his body shook as it drew closer and closer.

"Ah … ahhhhhn!"

Gray felt the teeth tighten. "Stop biting me!"

"Argh! Fine!"

To his surprise, Natsu instead grabbed Gray's hair in his teeth and yanked. Gray's head was forced to look up, stretching his neck. It hurt, he felt hairs ripping out, but he realized this was a better alternative. If Natsu could not bite him, he would pull his hair and claim him that way.

"Natsu!"

That hot body crashed up against him, shivering, thrusting in jolts.

"G-Gray … oh God … Gray … ooooh damn, yessss…"

Gray felt hot liquid splash his back, drip down his butt crack, over his ass, and snake thickly down his thighs.

"Oooooh," Natsu moaned, weakly thrusting the last of it out with long, languid strokes up Gray's butt crack.

"Oh … oh God, Natsu." Gray was pretty sure he had never felt anything so erotic as the Dragon Slayer coming against him like this.

Natsu spat out the mouthful of hair and leaned into Gray's ear. "You're mine," he declared in a possessive growl. Natsu licked the ice wizard's neck, gave him a soft but still rapacious bite on his earlobe, and hissed again in weariness: aggressive, predatory, and insatiable. "You're mine, Gray. My mate."

Gray shuddered, and for a moment he felt like crying. He had been so worried by the things Natsu said, fearing they were hints that the Dragon Slayer had grown bored or frustrated at him, not wanting a relationship anymore. With this, his confidence was restored. As Natsu licked his neck over and over in a domineering manner, Gray wanted to fall into this man's flames once again.

"Release the ice," Natsu ordered roughly. "I'll wash you. Then I'm cuddling you."

Gray laughed at how Natsu could say something so adorable, yet say it so aggressively. The ice vanished, but Gray still faced the wall.

"Are you okay?" Natsu asked in worry.

Gray nodded. "I'm aroused again. If I turn around, I'm going to fuck you senseless, and I can't do that yet."

"Touch yourself off," Natsu purred. "Come against the wall."

How could he say that and sound so sexy? It was not like Natsu at all. Or was it? Natsu had showed plenty of signs of inner aggressiveness in the past. Gray realized more and more, Natsu was definitely not submissive.

"As tempting as that is, I think my body is still too worn out for another go. I just need to calm myself." He glanced over his shoulder to the Dragon Slayer. "Wash my back?"

While smiling placidly, Natsu took a cleaning sponge and soaped it up. He lathered the suds over Gray's skin, cleaning away the mess he left on him. Natsu watched as the stringy white semen mixed with bubbles and swirled around the drain. However, when the sponge got close to Gray's rump, the ice wizard reached back and grabbed Natsu's wrist.

"Let me clean there. Clean your cock with disinfectant soap … just in case."

"I kept it against your low back."

"It was also up against my ass, and … and I'm not sure what areas of skin are infected. Just be safe … for my own peace of mind."

Natsu patted Gray's shoulder, stepped out to get the special disinfectant soap, and came back into the shower to wash with that. Gray watched him clean up the spent, limp member.

"Your balls, too. Don't forget them."

Doing this really was putting Natsu at risk. Even if Gray tried hard to keep them safe, he forgot about things when Natsu took charge.

"We shouldn't do this anymore."

Natsu looked up with huge, startled eyes. "Did you hate it?"

"Are you kidding me? That was damn hot! Too hot. I forget. I just get overwhelmed. Until I get better, we shouldn't do this."

"Oh," Natsu said sadly, dropping his gaze. "I'm … I'm sorry."

"Natsu."

He began to turn away. "I shouldn't have…"

"Natsu!" he snapped, and Gray grabbed the Dragon Slayer around the shoulders. "Look at me! As soon as I'm well, I want you to do that again," he insisted. "I want you to grab me. Force me to the bed." He gulped hard as arousal thickened his throat. "I want you … to thrust up against me, just like now, and pound me into that mattress!"

Natsu blinked in surprise. "Gray…"

"That was damn hot!" he sneered lustfully. "I definitely want to do that again. But … I'm scared right now. I can't get you sick." He hugged Natsu under the cascading water to hide the anguish in his face. No way could he allow Natsu to get sick! "Especially right now … you're in such a good area, and I don't want to stop you. At all! And that's dangerous. I could end up making you sick, and … and I can't do that," he gnashed. "So, all that aggression in you: save it up! Save it for when I'm well. And when I am, I want you to ravage me as hard as you can!"

Natsu chuckled at the fervor crackling in those frosty eyes. He felt a streak of arrogance and grinned hungrily at Gray. "Oh, don't worry." He tipped Gray's chin to be even with his own mouth. "I plan to!" He gave Gray a rough kiss, biting his lower lip erotically.

"Oh God," Gray shuddered.

Natsu smirked in amusement. "Also, when you're well, I want to bite you while doing that. I want to sink my teeth into you and mark you."

Gray inhaled a hiss through his teeth as he felt a twinge down below. "Natsu … come on!" he whined in sexual frustration.

The Dragon Slayer laughed slyly and let go of Gray. "Wash quickly." He turned and walked out of the bathroom with a swaggering stride to his bare ass. "I'll warm up the bed."

Chapter Text

Gray got out of the shower and saw Natsu lying in bed, glancing through the latest Sorcerer Magazine that had his own pink-headed face plastered on the front. He looked so relaxed and normal, not at all like the frightening attacker he had pretended to be that morning, or the wildly aggressive sex fiend he had been just a few minutes ago. He looked like normal Natsu, completely dry already, dressed in trousers but no shirt, with his white scarf wrapped around his neck.

"Anything interesting in the magazine?" asked Gray.

"Jason is still an asshole."

Gray had to laugh at that. That hyperactive reporter who shouted "Cool, cool, coooooool" all the time had somehow earned the wrath of the Fire Dragon Slayer.

"Did you take your medicine this morning?" asked Natsu.

"Yeah, I did just now. Seven more days of taking those pills. I can't wait until I don't have to anymore."

Natsu set the magazine down and fidgeted in his seat. "Hey Gray, I was thinking."

"That's rare for you."

"Shut up! Do you … maybe … wanna … stay at my place?"

"Do you mean tonight?"

Natsu tucked his head down into his scarf and muttered, "I was thinking more like … every night."

Gray eyes widened.

"Ah! I … I mean … just until you're well. You're sick, it's normal to take care of sick people, so no one will question it. Well, not much. Happy seemed to be fine with it."

"Oh. But … I'm not going to be sick for much longer, hopefully."

"That's fine. Even if it's just a week, it's fine. I … wanna live with you," Natsu declared boldly, but that confidence wavered when Gray's mouth dropped. "Is that weird?"

It took a moment for Gray to get over the shock. "No. No, i-i-it's … it's not weird, just … shocking. You … want to…? R-really?"

Natsu nodded happily. Suddenly, Gray leaped onto the bed on top of Natsu, glad the Dragon Slayer really did still want him despite having an infection.

"God, I … I'm so relieved. I'm glad you feel that way." He kissed Natsu hard. "Even just for a week, let's do it."

Natsu beamed happily. "Awesome! Now, let's go on a date."

Gray glanced to a clock. "I guess it's close to lunchtime. We skipped breakfast."

"We were busy," Natsu smirked. "But I want to have a date with you. I'm buying, so I get to pick, and I want ramen."

"You're a cheap date," Gray teased, trying to tickle Natsu but not finding any good spots.

"I just really love ramen." Natsu reached forward and casually tickled him back.

To his surprise, Gray laughed and swatted his hands away. Natsu was stunned. He never thought about a stripper like Gray being ticklish. A scheming gleam shined in his eyes as Natsu chuckled mischievously. He reached out again, and his fingers attacked Gray's ribs.

"Kyaaaaa! Stop! Stop it!"

Gray laughed and fought off Natsu's tickle attack. The two boys tussled and roughhoused all over the bed until they fell off and landed on the floor. Still, Natsu aimed to reach Gray's ribs, armpits, stomach, all the normal places. Gray shielded himself, yet he still laughed even if he managed to keep Natsu's burning fingers away.

"Stoooooop!" Gray wailed, laughing uncontrollably. "I'm serious, stop."

He knew of one weakness for Natsu. Gray covered the tip of his finger with a layer of ice and rammed it into Natsu's belly button, wiggling it around. Natsu shrieked a laugh and rolled away across the rug.

"I give, I'm sorry," he laughed.

Gray pounced on top of him. "Who says I forgive you?"

He tickled with the ice again, but Natsu aimed for Gray's waist. Just a slight pinch to it made Gray collapse to the floor with convulsive laughter. Natsu instantly rolled on top of him, pinned Gray's arms above his head, and tickled his armpits.

"Oh God, no, stop!" Gray shrieked, writhing underneath, laughing and gasping for air. "Oh … shit, Natsu, no! Come on, I'm … I'm gonna piss myself. S-s-stop!"

Natsu stopped and grinned wildly down at Gray. "Maybe I want that."

Gray breathed hard, but he looked up in surprise. "You … want … that?" He gulped to moisten his throat through the heavy panting. "Since when have you been into pissing?"

"It'd serve you right," Natsu said a little harshly.

Gray saw just a small bit of spite. He guessed Natsu was still upset about last time, when Gray made him pee his pants with the chastity belt on. He had pushed Natsu's limits too far that day.

"Sorry," Gray whispered, looking aside with guilt.

"Apology not accepted." Natsu tickled Gray even more, and the bad feelings vanished as Gray squealed with laughter.

"Noooo! I'm serious, stop! Na- … kyaaaa … Natsu! Stop … hehehe … stoooop."

Natsu let him go. Gray kept twitching with spasmodic laughs, holding his midsection protectively with his armpits closed tightly in self-defense. His face was flushed from all the roughhousing, his chest rose and fell deeply at each breath, and when he glanced up at Natsu, those stormy-blue eyes looked a little hazy. Natsu realized Gray looked this way one other time: just after sex. It was an arousing face to show, and Natsu knew that if he stayed like this, he would attack Gray, just like he had attacked him just a few minutes ago in the shower.

"I forgive you," Natsu said, and he kissed Gray on the forehead. "Now, lunch." He rolled off and rose to his feet.

It still took Gray a minute to calm his breathing, while Natsu walked around getting dressed, combing his hair, and straightening his white scarf.

"Hurry up, slow poke. I'm hungry! Ramen, ramen, ramen, ramen!"

Gray leaned back and sighed out the last of his twitching laughs. Defeated through tickling! What an idiot! But he adored this crazy Dragon Slayer.


After an uneventful but still sweet lunch together at a ramen shop, the two went to the guild. Natsu went to find Happy and apologize for not coming home last night. Happy did not question it, and Natsu had a feeling his best friend already knew why he was gone.

Gray felt a little self-conscious. He and Natsu had entered the guild together. No one questioned it, though. Part of him realized they had no reason to question. There was nothing weird about two teammates entering at the same time, even if they were rivals. Still, after a wild morning like that, and a sweet date with his boyfriend, Gray was worried that people would start noticing things about them.

He took a seat across the room. It was another normal day in Fairy Tail. Gajeel was sitting in the corner having an arm-wrestling contest with Elfman. Lucy sat at the bar, her notebook out, writing her story, with Levy looking over her shoulder trying to read everything Lucy penned. Cana was at her own table working on her third barrel, although it was barely past noon, with a gathering of the younger men around her telling lewd jokes. Reedus was painting a picture. Nab stood by the mission board like always. Vijeeter danced on a table. Laki and Kinana were gossiping with Mira. All around him, Gray saw the normal, everyday, Fairy Tail ruckus.

Then he heard a distinctive laugh and looked across the room. He could have sat next to Natsu, but it was a bit awkward. Natsu sat with Lisanna, Wendy, Carla, Happy, and Romeo. He was not sure what they were talking about, but Wendy and Romeo were laughing, Lisanna was shaking her head while tittering, and Natsu was boasting about something.

Gray found himself staring, watching him from afar. Natsu looked like a normal guy, laughing so widely, as if nothing had happened.

Then a flashback hit Gray: the shower that morning. Just a few hours ago, Natsu had shown Gray just how aggressive he could be. Gray never thought he would want someone to top him again. He had tried it once. It was not so great. Not that he had minded the pain too much. Perhaps if he had actually known the guy, had feelings for him, rather than some random stranger he found at a gay bar, it could have been a better experience.

If it had been with someone he cared for…

If it was with Natsu…

He wanted to try it with Natsu. He wanted to see that aggressive side.

And he knew, Natsu was not ready. It was so frustrating.

Still, Gray could almost feel that heat up against his flesh as Natsu pressed against him, rubbing, stroking himself against Gray's back. It was like he could feel that fire against his skin right here, right now.

In the midst of these prurient thoughts, Erza came up. "Thinking about something?" she asked, taking a casual seat beside him.

Gray blushed a bit and hoped his boner did not show. How could he possibly tell her about his wild fantasies and lewd memories? He glanced again at Natsu.

"It's nothing," he muttered.

Erza smiled to herself. "You could go over and talk to Natsu, you know?"

Gray took on a typical grimace at the Dragon Slayer's name. "Why would I want to do that?" he asked with a hint of annoyance. "Maybe I'll challenge him later. Right now, it's not worth the bother." Gray tried to make it sound like normal. He hoped he at least looked the part of a rival. Probably not.

He still could not help it. His eyes drifted back to Natsu. He knew he had to calm things down between them. He had just seven more days of medication to go before getting tested again. Still, after just a week…

There was no way to hold himself back, no matter how he tried, and how much he knew he needed to be careful. As if that craving was not bad enough, Natsu wanted to live together again, this time staying at his place. That was probably better. With Happy around, they would be less tempted. Still, although Gray knew he should have said no, he could not help but say yes. He needed Natsu. Desperately! He had not realized how addicted he had become until his drug—his fix—had been taken away.

"Erza?" He needed to distract himself. "Do you think the team can take a mission? I'm feeling fine, really."

"I'm not chancing you missing your medicine doses. If you're truly in need of more money, I can take Lucy and Natsu on another mission. Or if it's serious, I can let you borrow a little."

"No … no, I'm fine for now, not that desperate," he grumbled. Partly, he realized that he did not want Natsu to leave him again. If it was a mission, he wanted to be with Natsu.

"You're bored, right? That's normal. As soon as you're well, we should do something as a team."

"Yeah…" He still felt troubled, flustered by his inner thoughts, consciously trying not to look at Natsu so often.

Just then, Lucy walked past them. "I'm leaving, Erza."

"Did you rewrite that chapter?"

"Yes, with your suggestions. Thank you. I'm meeting Loke now for some training."

Gray chuckled softly. "Training, huh?"

Lucy's cheeks went bright pink. "Hmph! Y-yes, training."

"You've been training a lot lately," Erza pointed out. "That's good. It's a fine thing to improve one's skills."

Lucy grinned at such praise coming from a woman she admired. "Yes, and Loke's been making me stronger."

"Don't limit yourself to just one," Erza warned.

Lucy looked confused. "Don't … limit myself?"

Gray was trying hard to hold back his laughter. He bet Lucy was thinking Erza was telling her to sleep around. It was hilarious to see her shocked face and Erza's obliviousness.

"You should train with all of your Celestial Spirits," Erza told her. "Your strength is in your diversity."

Lucy suddenly let out a nervous laugh of relief as she realized what Erza actually meant. "Oh, of course, of course. It's not good to ignore any of them."

Gray smirked at her embarrassment. "Have fun training Loke. Ah, I mean, training with Loke. Sorry, slip of the tongue. I'm sure you know how that's like."

She got angry now. "Gray!" she shouted. "You … you pervert!" She scoffed, stomped her boot, and stormed out of the guild hall as her cheeks burned brightly in mortification. The ice wizard just laughed at her way-too-obvious reaction to his teasing.

Erza glaring reproachingly. "Gray, that wasn't nice."

"Oh come on! We know those two are fuc-…"

"Gray," she warned, and her dark eyes silenced him instantly.

Gray shrank down under her disapproving scowl. "Sorry, Erza."

The menacing aura around her faded as quickly as it had formed. "Lucy and Loke aren't ready to announce to the whole guild. We should respect that. I'm sure you know just how that is."

He glanced sideways at her. Cautiously, he asked, "What do you mean?"

Just then, Natsu leaped up. "See ya later, guys. Happy, I might be late coming home. I have some … special training." He turned to leave, and as he did, his eyes met Gray's. They were intense, poignant, rife with lust that had not been fully sated despite their play last night and that morning.

Does this guy ever wear out? Sheesh, I seriously don't know if I could go for another round.

"Gray."

He leaped at Erza's voice and looked back at her. He felt like he had been caught doing something wrong. Well, in a way, he had. Gray had been staring at Natsu's ass as he left out the door and thinking about the faint limp Natsu had from the paddling he got last night.

"Come on," she smiled, dropping her voice. "It's only obvious that you and Natsu have been hanging around each other a lot more than usual. I saw you at a ramen shop around lunch, I've seen you at ice cream parlors and walking around town together, and you two came in together today."

"We … we're just … uh…" He stuttered as he tensed up at getting found out, and by Erza of all people. "We're just trying to be … friendly … like you always tell us to be."

"Uh-huh," she smirked knowingly.

Gray looked around the guild frantically, but it was a normal day, no one was near enough to hear them, and no one was watching. "Erza, come on," he growled. "Stop joking."

She kept her smile but dropped her voice softer. "It would take an idiot not to see it."

He left out a sigh of frustration, but there was no use hiding anything from Erza. "And how many idiots are in this guild?"

"Too many. I don't think anyone but Gajeel knows. I overheard him muttering about Natsu smelling like you, but he won't say anything. I made sure of it."

Gray was curious, but he figured he really did not want to know precisely how the Titania had made sure to keep the Iron Dragon Slayer's mouth shut on the matter.

"Do you really not want people to know?"

"No!" he cried out, but his voice dropped again. "Come on, Erza. I'm … I'm sick still."

"Yes, which is what worries me," she said, all playfulness gone and a serious expression on her stoic face.

"Which is precisely why I'm not telling anyone yet," he whispered. "Not until I'm well."

"Are you two…?" Her eyebrow waggled to silently express what she meant.

"I'm being careful," he cut in sharply. He looked around again, making sure no one saw her. "We both are."

"You better be," she warned sternly. "If you get him infected"

"I'm not going to let him get sick," Gray growled, fury in his eyes. "Absolutely not! I … I ca- … can't put him through that." He blinked his eyes as he thought about the fear he had. Even just from this morning, with Natsu pressed against him, that had scared Gray afterward. There was no way he could handle it if Natsu got sick because of him.

"Were you two … involved before you found out about your sickness?"

"Yes, he was tested, and he's fine. I've not … we haven't … I'm being careful." Even if they had been somewhere private, he would feel embarrassed to talk about this, but speaking about his sex life in the middle of the guild was too much.

"So, you top, huh?"

His cheeks instantly went crimson. "Erza!" he hissed.

"No one can hear us," she assured with a whimsical smile. "Besides, I'm curious."

Gray debated it. He did not want to kiss-and-tell, he felt his relationship was his own business, but he was also a little worried that if he said nothing, Erza might speak up. It was silent blackmail. So blushing, he whispered, "Y-yeah. I'm … he's … it's not like he … ah, dammit," he grumbled.

"It's complicated, huh?"

Gray had to laugh wryly. "That's an understatement."

"You do know … well, maybe you don't know." She dropped her voice to be aimed at just him. "Natsu had an … issue in the past. He was deeply scarred. Tortured."

Gray looked over at her in shock. "How do you know about that?"

"I was warned," she said cautiously. "Did Natsu tell you everything?"

"He told me enough." Gray glanced around the guild. "How many people know? Honestly, before we hooked up, I had no clue he went through that. None!"

"I don't think many people know. I was only warned when we started up the team. Makarov took me aside and … well, he just gave me a warning to keep an eye on Natsu, just in case."

Gray sighed, not sure how to feel. On one hand, it was good that Makarov cared enough about Natsu's well-being that he had Erza keep an eye on him. After all, there was no telling when a mission might turn bad and something could have triggered the Dragon Slayer's buried fears and aggressions. On the other hand, he wished no one knew about that side of Natsu. He wanted to protect Natsu and shield him from anyone finding out that he had suffered in that sort of way.

"Is he really okay with this?" Erza asked cautiously.

Gray thought about all the troubles they had up to this point. If she had asked during their first week of being a couple, he might have wondered if Natsu truly was okay. Even if it had been yesterday, after Natsu questioned aloud if their relationship was worth it, he had doubts. However, right now, after the aggressive lust Natsu showed, and after asking Gray to live with him for a week, Gray felt far more confident.

"I think he's getting better because of this," he said with a light smile. "It's helping him to learn how to deal with his past."

"I don't know details, Gray, and I don't want them. Makarov told me just enough so that I understand potential triggers and can avoid missions that might involve things Natsu would not handle well. However, from my understanding, what you two are involved in is definitely riddled with potential triggers. When I first heard the story, I worried that the poor guy would never be able to have a normal relationship."

Gray had to laugh. He wondered if this even counted as a normal relationship.

"I'm truly worried for him."

Gray was glad someone like Erza was the one who knew. "He … has issues," he confessed softly. "I work with him. We work around the things that bother him. Sometimes, I think we're helping each other."

"Each other?" she asked, mildly intrigued. "What sort of issues do you…?"

"Erza, don't," he warned sternly.

"I'm curious about you, also."

"It's none of your damn business."

"You're right," she agreed. "I'm just worried for you. You're like a brother, Gray. We grew up together. I know, even when I first arrived here at Fairy Tail, you had a very deep darkness in your heart, one that kept you from fully opening up to others, even close friends."

"Yeah," he agreed, thinking about how his fear of love plagued him still, "and Natsu is helping me. A lot," he added with a faint smile.

"That's good. I think you two are … well, I don't want to say you're meant for each other, since I honestly never would have imagined it could work out this way, but I think you're good for each other."

"You … you approve?" he asked in surprise.

"Are you seeking my blessing? I'm not Natsu's mother."

"No, just … I wasn't sure how the guild would react."

"Well, to be honest, I think that when you two do come forward, you're going to get a wide variety of reactions. This is you and Natsu, after all. Still, I think more people than you imagine will fully support you two as a couple." She knew already that Mira and Lucy were fond of the idea of the two rivals secretly being lovers, and surely other girls in the guild had yaoi fantasies about these two.

Gray looked down at his hands. "I hope so," he muttered. "Don't tell anyone, okay? We're not ready. Um … I'm not ready. I mean, I want to tell them. I want to tell everyone, but … not when I'm like this. I … I don't want anyone to think anything bad about Natsu, especially because of me, because of my past, because of what's going on right now, being sick. I don't want any of that … filth … to make him seem dirty."

"Gray, I think the guild would forgive your past. We're good at forgiving."

He let out a soft laughing hum and had to nod at that. He had forgiving Lyon for what happened on Galuna Island. Lucy had forgiven her father. The guild had come to accept Gajeel and Juvia, although they had attacked Fairy Tail and destroyed the first guild hall. They had all forgiven Laxus and the Thunder God Tribe despite pitting the guild against one another. And Erza…

"You know better than anyone, right?" he said with a smile to her.

"Yes, I do," she said wistfully, and Gray could see that she was thinking about Jellal again. "Sometimes, it's very hard to forgive people, but sometimes it's easy. Your past relationships are your own business, Gray. No one judges Gildarts for his promiscuous ways. No one ever got angry at Loke. Annoyed, maybe, but we let him date as many girls as he wanted and never scolded him. You and Natsu might face hard times at first, but I truly think we'd all eventually forgive your past and support both of you, so long as you don't cheat on him and hurt him."

"I never cheat on someone I truly care for," he assured her sternly.

"I'll hold you to that," she warned. "I understand that this is a hard time for you, being sick like this, yet just now discovering your feelings for someone. It's honorable that you're thinking about Natsu's welfare to this extent. So, I'll keep quiet. When you're ready, just make sure I'm here," she said sternly. "Don't you dare tell everyone when I'm not around to see what their reactions are going to be like."

"I think as long as you support us, everyone else will fall into line."

"They better!" she said with a thudding tone.

Gray laughed softly. "You're too scary, Erza."

He glanced around again. Hopefully soon, he could just come out and say it. He wondered if their announcement would be explosive, or if the guild would casually accept it. Maybe more people than just Erza had noticed already. The most anticlimactic response would be for everyone to say "About time!" and go back to their normal conversations.

Or the whole guild would blow up with angry denial and shouts of protest. That was what Gray feared, at least.

"Um … when we do come out, could you be the first to … um … to congratulate us or … or…" Gray's face tensed up, and he looked down to his hands folded nervously in his lap. "I just don't want Natsu to get ridiculed … at all. He's excited and eager to tell everyone, and I don't want him to be disappointed. I don't want him to feel like this—all of this—is nothing but a mistake. I don't want to lose him over something as stupid as peer pressure."

"Sure, Gray," she said amicably. "When you two are ready, I'll be the first to congratulate you. I'll also pound anyone who gets out of line."

"Thanks, Erza. Really, that's a big load off my shoulders, knowing one person will accept us."

"Like I said, you're like a little brother. Both you are Natsu are family. It's—ahem—not something I expected, per say," she confessed, "but if it makes you happy, and if it helps him, I want to be supportive of both of you."

He blinked hard to keep his eyes from watering. "Th-thank you so much," he whispered, his heart swelling with happiness.

Erza pounded him on the back with her gauntlet. "Now, go chase after Natsu before you start crying."

"Hey!" he shouted in protest.

She chuckled and leaned into his ear. "He's waiting for you, Gray. Go make your boyfriend happy."

He blushed to hear her say that aloud. Having someone else call Natsu his boyfriend made the relationship seem more official. Erza nudged him with her elbow and winked. Gray whispered thank you again, got up, and left the guild hall.

Natsu actually was waiting for him at the entryway, standing by the large gates with his arms folded. He turned away as soon as he saw Gray exit, and when Gray rounded the corner, he saw that Natsu was heading to Gray's place. He followed at a distance, sensing that Natsu was keeping himself ahead just far enough. Finally, as they reached Gray's quiet neighborhood, Natsu's steps slowed down until Gray gradually caught up.

They walked along quietly, keeping some space between them, until they reached Gray's apartment. There, Gray reached over and boldly took Natsu's hand. The cold grasp startled Natsu, and he almost tripped over his own feet. Then he smiled, squeezed Gray's hand in return, and they went back to the room hand in hand.

"Natsu," he said softly as they went up stairs. "Earlier, were you serious about wanting to live together?"

"Yeah," Natsu said, surprised he would ask.

"I'd … like that," he said awkwardly. "Maybe not permanent yet, but … I have another week to go. We can give it a trial run, if you promise to behave yourself. I am still sick, y'know."

Natsu blushed lightly and confessed, "That's part of the reason for asking you. I think I'd behave myself more at my house than at yours. You're the one with all the kinky stuff."

"True enough," Gray agreed, realizing that with Happy around, he would constantly think twice before initiating anything. He brought out his keys and let them inside the apartment. "I'll pack a few clothes. Then we can head over."

"Great! We should tell everyone tonight."

"No." Gray looked up into Natsu's face. "Erza and I were talking about it."

"Erza?"

"She kind of figured it out," he confessed.

"And she approves?" Natsu asked eagerly.

"I guess so…"

"Yay! We got Erza's approval," Natsu cheered. "If she approves, everyone will."

"Not everyone," Gray muttered. Magnolia should be put on flood warning before someone told Juvia. "She was worried. Everyone else would be as well, and I don't want them to think badly of you. Happy's going to mention that I'm staying with you. We can let people think it's just because I'm sick, and then I fell for you while you were caring for me. It's a typical story, right? The patient falls for the person nursing them to health. Then when I'm better, when my tests are all clear, we can slowly let people realize something is up. We'll let them think we've just started hanging out more, unofficial dating, not that we've been fucking one another for weeks."

Natsu pouted and looked away to the corner of the room. "Would it be better that way?"

"I think so," Gray replied hesitantly, wondering about the upset look in the Dragon Slayer's face.

"It's just … I want to tell everyone," he whined. "I don't want to hide it anymore."

Gray hugged Natsu's shoulders and pulled him in close. "I know." He kissed the top of the pink head. "This is just a really bad time for me. If people knew, they would think I got you sick. I don't want them to think that about you. Erza was really worried. Others would be, too. When we tell them, I want them to be happy for us, not worried about us. I don't…" His throat clenched. Here was the real reason Gray wanted to hold back telling their friends. "I don't want people to accuse me of getting you sick. When Cana announced it to the whole guild, people were so mad at me. Hell, Lucy slapped me! I don't want that sort of reaction again. I don't want them angry at me and thinking badly of you for getting involved with me. It'll be bad enough that people will think I'm about to corrupt you."

"You did," Natsu pointed out, and he grinned sensually at Gray. "And I loved it."

Gray laughed and gave him another light kiss. "I want our friends to be as happy for us being together, as I feel happy being with you. I want them to party, not start yelling at me and warning you to not get involved with a man-whore like me. I want them to cheer and faint and be shocked, not yell and get angry and try to break us apart before we can even be happy as an openly-dating couple. I want it to be memorable, not regrettable."

Natsu picked up Gray's hand and kissed his knuckles. "You have a romantic buried deep inside that kinky brain of yours. Don't worry. It'll be fine. Even if it turns out bad, I'll be there to hold your hand." He kissed Gray's fingers again, dragging his lips slowly over the skin.

Gray felt his cheeks get hot from the burning lips of the Fire Dragon Slayer. "Idiot," he mumbled, yanking his hand away before he got aroused from memories of Natsu sucking on his fingers in the shower. "It's supposed to be me protecting you."

"Screw that! You know I'm not some weakling."

"Yeah, but still"

"Hey." Natsu pulled Gray over to the couch, and they sat down together. "When we tell them, I'm going to be right there beside you, okay? We'll be holding hands and smiling at one another and looking sickeningly cute and in love."

Gray flinched slightly at that. In love…

"I'll be there, so you don't have to worry. Even if they react bad, that doesn't matter. Even if the guild doesn't approve … well, screw them! Some might not be okay with it, but our real friends are going to cheer us on. So it'll be fine even if a few think we're not right for one another. Hell, we both know Juvia isn't going to be happy to find out her Gray-sama is dating a man."

Gray groaned loudly and flopped his head back on the couch. "Oh God," he moaned in annoyance. "Yeah, she's going to be a problem."

Natsu patted his hand consolingly. "I don't know if Lisanna will be an issue. Probably not. She'll be okay so long as it makes me happy. I was worried about Erza, honestly."

"Me, too. That's why I'm glad she approves."

"Yeah, she'd be scary if she was against the idea. So see, it's gonna be okay."

Gray's brow tensed up. "I still want to wait."

"That's fine," Natsu assured. "I mean, it's just another seven days."

Gray grumbled, "We should give it some time even afterward, otherwise it's obvious we were hiding it the whole time."

"Ten days, then. We can tell everyone in ten days."

"That works."

"Good. Then in ten days we'll announce to the guild that we're dating." Natsu rested his head on Gray's shoulder while squeezing his hand. "It'll be awesome, you know. Half the guild will faint, and the other half will want details."

"Details," Gray grumbled.

"Obviously, we won't tell them," Natsu chuckled. "I liked your idea earlier. You'll stay at my place, I'll care for you while you're sick, and people will think we fell in love just recently."

"What if they ask me … why? Or what I feel about you? I mean, remember with Happy? What if people want me to … to say it? What if they ask you 'Has he ever said I lo- … I lo-…' Dammit!" He clenched up his fists and growled in frustrated. "Goddammit, I used to be able to say the word in passing just fine, and now I can't even do that. I'm … I'm too scared. I'm scared because I know I feel it, so I'm afraid if I say it, that's like the final word in a magic spell that makes you end up dead."

"Calm down," Natsu said, looking worried at the angry shouts.

"No!" he bellowed. "What if they ask?"

Natsu squeezed his hand tighter. "Gray, you've said it in so many ways, and you've showed me in more ways than words could ever express."

"But … but what if they ask?" he hissed in frustration.

"I'll be right there, right beside you, and if they ask, I'll be the one to answer."

"You're not always going to be there, Natsu," he snapped.

Tears came to his eyes, and he pulled away before Natsu could see him like this. Gray threw off his shirt in anger as he walked to his window, but he felt the heat of the Dragon Slayer come up long before those warm arms embraced him from behind, and the soft pink hair rested against his bare back.

Gray looked out the window and down to the street. He saw a young couple walking hand in hand. He bet those two said 'I love you' all the time. He feared their friends would want to hear them declare it. They might pressure Gray into saying it. No one would understand why he could not say it. He barely understood it himself. He knew it was a silly superstition, but that did not ease his phobia.

"The more I think about itthe more I feel itthe more scared I get … and the more I feel miserable that I can't even say the damn words!" he shouted.

Natsu squeezed around Gray tighter. "Maybe we can think of a way for you to answer that sounds even better, without saying those words."

"Yeah, like what?" he grumbled petulantly.

"Well, like you can say … um … he's precious to me."

"That doesn't sound quite the same."

"Well then, say he's … he's … I dunno. I mean, what am I to you?" Natsu asked, looked up imploringly to Gray.

Gray turned around to face the Dragon Slayer. He cupped Natsu's cheek in his hand and smiled with heartfelt emotions. "You're everything."

"Everything like … what?" he asked.

"I don't know!" he snapped, but Gray glared off to the side, trying to put it into words. "You're … you…" Could he say it? He felt he could. "You're … my beloved."

Natsu's eyes went huge. His mouth opened to speak, but the words dried up. He looked thoroughly overwhelmed by Gray's words.

"I can say that word," Gray insisted. "You're my boyfriend, my … my … my lover." That word was a little harder to say, although he told himself, he had taken many lovers without feeling emotions at all. The title of lover did not always have to imply the emotion of love. "You're … my beloved. Goddammit, why can I say those words but I can't say the other?"

"Because it's all psychological, Gray. You know that, and so do I. We both have issues, and we're working on them, so don't worry about it. I'm fine with that. You say what you can and … and…" He laughed softly. "Say it again," he urged emotionally.

Gray still felt cranky. "What?"

"Call me that again," he begged, looking ready to cry.

"Which?"

"Well … both."

Gray scoffed and looked away. However, he looked at those eager eyes, and he could hardly help it. "You're my beloved, the only lover I want or need."

Natsu covered his mouth and cheeks, and he suddenly looked away as tears came to his eyes. He began to laugh, and then snuffled, overwhelmed with emotions at hearing Gray call him such tender terms. Beloved was definitely not a word tossed out lightly, and being called it made happiness burn all through Natsu's nerves.

"D-dammit, I'm about to cry," he sputtered. Natsu laughed, but then he wiped his eyes. "Dammit!"

Gray touched his shoulder. "Natsu…"

The tears kept coming, although Natsu insistently wiped them away. "Why am I reacting so badly? Like a damn PMS'ing girl. I just…" His chest shuddered with joy. "I just really like hearing you say that," he confessed. "Dammit, the tears won't stop."

"Natsu," Gray whispered warmly.

"Tell them that." He still kept wiping at the tears, but he laughed some more. How ridiculous this was, laughing and crying over something so silly! "If … if they ask, and you can't say you love me, tell them that." He laughed some more, imagining the gawking faces. "Yeah, that'll make them shut up, because I think … I think that's way better than … than just three words." He snuffled up snot. "Dammit. I'm going to the bathroom."

"Natsu…"

"N-n-no. No, I'm … I'm acting like an idiot right now."

"You are an idiot, so stay here." Gray loved to see Natsu this emotional over something so sweet.

"I … I wanna laugh and cry and hear you call me that all night long." He tried to pull away again, but Gray wrapped him up in his arms, refusing to let him go. "I just … I like to hear you call me that. I don't know why."

"It's the same as when I hear you call me kainushi. It makes me feel warm inside."

Natsu laughed some more. "We really are a stupid couple now." He turned around to face Gray solidly. His eyes were bloodshot, but his face beamed with intense joy. "I love you. I'm no good with words, so that's all I know how to say, just those three words. You're able to say so much more about how you feel and what you think about me. I'm … I'm a little jealous. Even if you can't say that one word, you can say and show so much more." Then Natsu bit his lip and asked timidly, "Can … can you say it again? Just one more time."

"Silly," Gray teased, caressing away the tears. "I care about you so much, and I want you to know, you're my dear, precious lover. I never want to lose you, I would die to save you, and I would fight anyone or anything to protect you … because you are the only person in my life who I've ever thought of as being my beloved. That's something that belongs to no one else but you, Natsu. You're the only person who has ever touched me this deeply."

The playful smiles vanished, and Natsu looked up to him in shock. "Gray…" he whispered. "The … the only…?" His lips began to tremble, tears tumbled over his eyelids, and he turned away again. "Dammit, now I really am crying."

"You were crying before, idiot." Gray walked around to face Natsu, but the Dragon Slayer tried to look away. Gray pulled his head back. "I like seeing these type of tears on your face. Come here." He began to pull Natsu back to the couch.

"N-no. I wanna go to the bathroom, wash my face, and…"

"And I want you to stay here."

"Gray"

"Stay!" he ordered sternly.

Natsu pouted in protest. He flopped on the couch, folded his arms, and looked away stubbornly.

"Good dragon. I want to hold you, just like this. Just hold you." Gray wrapped his arms around Natsu and nuzzled into his hair, giving him a kiss on the scalp. "We can stay like this all day, if you want."

"Mmmm," Natsu hummed happily. "But I kinda wanna head home for tonight. I want to start living together."

"Then I'll pack, and we'll go back to your place. Later. I want to hold you for now, when I'm not self-conscious about Happy staring at us."

"Are you really going to stay the night?"

"I said I would."

"Good." Natsu snuggled into Gray's arms. "I want you to stay the night. Every night," he added softly.

Gray smiled at hearing that. He wanted it, too. He never wanted to be apart, not for anything. He kissed the rim of Natsu's ear and breathed in softly, "My beloved."

Instead of overwhelming him, the emotions now just warmed Natsu up, making him want to hold onto Gray tighter than ever. "I love you," Natsu whispered. "Now I really wanna tell everyone. Ten days, right?"

"Yes," Gray said quietly, rubbing Natsu's neck with his nose, and laying down occasional kisses. "In ten days, we'll tell them."

"We need to put Magnolia on flood alert," Natsu said drowsily, loving the feel of Gray's mouth on his skin.

Gray chuckled quietly to himself, nibbling Natsu's earlobe. "I was just thinking the same thing. Maybe we can arrange to have Juvia out of town that day."

"We'll have to deal with her eventually. You don't think she'd actually try to kill me, do you?"

Gray thought about it and then answered honestly, "She might. She is a bit obsessive."

"That's putting it mildly," Natsu scoffed. "Have you seen her room?"

Gray looked over in shock. "You have?"

"No, but Happy has. He goes to Fairy Hills once in a while, they let him in because he's a cat, and he went into her room one day. He told me about … the dolls." He shivered slightly.

"Dolls?"

"You really don't want to know," Natsu grimaced. Happy's description of Juvia's room had been creepy even back then. Now that he was Gray's lover, it seemed so much worse.

"Oh God," Gray moaned, pretty sure he could guess as least a little about how bad it was, and too afraid to ask for details. "I really might have to protect you from her."

"Yeah. Not that I mind. You'll have to stay with me all the time. She might attack during the night."

"You just don't want me to go, do you?"

"Nope," Natsu grinned. "I want you with me every night."

Gray ruffled up his pink hair. "Maybe just until she calms down. We could switch off, me sleeping at your place and you sleeping at mine. Once everyone knows, they won't question if we sleep together."

"They might question the bruises. That's what you were most worried about, right?"

Gray frowned and grumbled, "Yeah." He was still worried about that part. He did not want the guild to know he was a sadist with a lot of kinks.

"It's the only downside," Natsu agreed. "Well, that is … unless they think I'm the kinky one."

It took Gray a moment to figure out what Natsu meant, and he looked at the Dragon Slayer in shock. "Whuuuh?"

"They don't have to know it's you. They can think it's me."

"But … but Natsu"

"I'm fine with that, Gray. They already think my so-called girlfriend was kinky and into bondage. I could just hint that after experiencing it once, I rather liked it. That's not lying. Well, so long as I don't mention the fictitious girlfriend directly. I just have to be vague. 'I tried it once, I really liked it, so Gray does that to me now.' Then they'll think I'm the one who's kinky, and I'm making you do these things to me because I like it. I'm willing to take on that burden, Gray. It's fine by me." He looked truly accepting of it.

"R-really?" Gray asked, stunned that Natsu would go this far, just like he had when he lied to Happy to protect Gray's honor.

"Yeah. That way, they won't think anything bad about you besides that…" He laughed lustfully. "…that you're giving me what I want." He ran his hand up Gray's bare chest. "Which is totally true." He turned around and climbed on top of Gray, straddling him over the couch. "I want your kinkiness," he moaned, rubbing himself against Gray's body. "I want you to tie me up and work me out. I love making you restrain me."

He kissed Gray, and their tongues casually danced together. Then Natsu bit Gray's lower lip, tugging it out with a hungering sneer. Gray moaned at the bite, and Natsu felt a stirring in Gray's pants. Then Natsu's sultry face instantly went away, and he rolled off, plopping back onto the couch, leaving Gray turned on.

"That's what I'm gonna do, and that's final."

"W-wait, what?" Gray blinked in confusion. Natsu had instantly messed up his head with that one kiss.

"That's what you're worried about most, right? Your whole issue with telling people, it originally started because you don't want anyone to know you're a kinky guy. It's bad enough that they think you sleep around, but if they thought you got off tying up people and hitting them … well, that looks bad for you and makes me look like I'm just being used. But if they think I'm the one making you tie me up, that's totally different. When the whole guild thought I had a kinky girlfriend, it didn't really bother me. Nobody teased me much after the first day. I just hated to lie. I won't be lying this time. I like being spanked and restrained. It's arousing. If people know that … well, I'd rather if they mind their own damn business, but if they do find out, I don't mind. Plus it's my way of protecting you. You protect me from Juvia, and I'll protect you from rumors. Deal?" He ended with a beaming smile.

Gray laughed, stunned Natsu would take on what he felt was the heaviest burden of coming out to their friends. "Y-yeah … sure, it's a deal. Th-thank you," he muttered, truly amazing Natsu would go this far for him. "But we don't have to tell them."

"No, but if they find out, we can tell them that. We should still be cautious about leaving bruises at first. It's probably best if they think we're merely dating at the beginning."

"Precisely," Gray nodded. "I'll be careful."

"Me too. No more scratching up your chest."

"And I'll use my ice rather than ropes or cuffs. You don't get bruised that way. We can be careful."

"Of course we can. Now that that's settled, cuddle me." He flopped back against Gray and wiggling down into his chest.

Gray wrapped his arms around the warm Dragon Slayer and stare into nothingness. A few minutes ticked by with the two together, cuddled close, simply enjoying being together. Gray gave a long sigh of contentment.

"It's rather nice, having simple moments like this."

"Mm-hmm," Natsu hummed. He felt at peace, and being held like this, he felt truly loved.

Gray whispered into Natsu's ears. "My beloved."

He shrank down a little and could hardly help but smile. "You really know how to make me blush."

"Yep," Gray smiled placidly. "I shouldn't use it too often, though. I might wear it out. Then I won't get to see you blush like this."

Natsu nodded sleepily. Then he teased, "Ice princess."

"Flame-brain."

"Stripper."

"Sulfur-breath."

"Pervy exhibitionist."

Gray laughed and squeezed him lightly. "Guilty as charged." Then in a cold breath, he whispered into Natsu's ear again. "Beloved."

"Stop it," Natsu whined, hating how he blushed at just one word. "It's getting embarrassing now."

"Good. You do realize, I've gotta call you that in public."

"What! Y-you don't have to," he protested.

"Yep. I want to."

Natsu petulantly sank down, hiding into Gray's chest. "Idiot," he mumbled. "Let's go to my house already."

"Then get up."

"Don't wanna."

"Then we're staying here."

"Don't wanna either."

"Then I'm carrying you princess-style from here to your house."

"Like hell!" Natsu stood up. "Pack your clothes. I'll go on ahead. I'm not sure how we are on food. See you in a bit."

"Yeah," Gray muttered. Once again, he caught himself staring at Natsu's ass as he left out the door. He still felt the lingering warmth in his chest and arms. He never wanted this feeling to end.

Chapter Text

It had been a long time since Gray lived in a situation where he had to watch his daily actions. That was the nice thing about living alone; he could do anything he wanted, and his bad habits were not mentioned by anyone. When it was just him and Natsu at his house, things flowed rather easily. Gray could walk around the house naked and Natsu never complained. They were lovers and could grope one another at any time they wanted.

However, with Happy around, Gray had to behave himself. If he started to walk around missing his pants, Happy would mention it. Every time he thought he could get in a sensual caress across Natsu's body, or a pinch to his butt, even a meaningful but silent smile, that damn blue cat always seemed to be there, like a chaperon from Hell. Sidling up behind Natsu as he cooked dinner, caressing up his thigh as they sat on the couch, even when he set out to "accidentally" walk in on Natsu in the shower, Happy was there.

"Gray, aren't you sick?"

Those large, round eyes seemed to seek him out everywhere. It started to get creepy by just the second day.

Their only real time alone was when they slept. Then Natsu would shut the bedroom door, Gray would strip down to his boxers, and their lips would crash together in desperation. Yet even then, they had to keep things tamed. Gray knew he was still undergoing treatment for his STD. He could not let Natsu do too much. They would lie in bed, arms wrapped around one another, kissing, caressing, but nothing more.

Although Gray told himself he should be happy that Natsu was with him, this was torture. Waking up to feel Natsu's morning woody pressed against his back, sometimes lightly humping against him with dreamy mumbles, potently reminded Gray of what he wanted Natsu to do to him, and how much he desperately craved the Dragon Slayer.

Yet whenever he tried to relieve some of his sexual frustration by light flirtations, Happy was right there, making Gray self-conscious and constantly restricting him.

"If we decide to live together permanently," he said one day while Happy was in the bathroom, "I'm not living with a cat."

Natsu's eyes looked stunned and hurt by the suddenly declaration. "But Happy is my best friend."

"Well, he can live somewhere else."

"He's too young to live on his own. We've always lived together."

"I don't like feeling this restricted," Gray snapped. "I'm not ready to have a kid around ruining my sex life."

That angered Natsu. "Is your sex life more important than my best friend? Happy knows we can't … do anything. If you're acting all horny and he's stopping you, he's probably doing it on purpose."

"It's not just him. It's you also. And it's not just about sex."

To demonstrate, Gray suddenly twisted around on the couch and straddled over Natsu's lap, grinding up against him.

Natsu's eyes went wide, and he hissed nervously, "Gray!"

Gray ignored him, yanked the white scarf aside, and sucked on Natsu's neck. He felt the hot body under him react instantly. Just three days of abstinence was enough to make Natsu sensitive.

"Nnngh … n-no, stop," he whimpered.

Instead, Gray thrust harder against him. He reached up into Natsu's hair, pulling it erotically. His lips sucked hard on the neck, his teeth scraped the skin, and Natsu shuddered silently. Then Gray's hand began to snake down Natsu's torso and toward the lump taking shape in his pants. Just then, they heard the toilet flush.

"No!"

Gray covered Natsu's mouth with his own lips, silencing the protests with an all-encompassing kiss. From the bathroom, they heard a faucet running. Suddenly, Natsu slammed his hands against Gray's chest, shoving him off the couch to slam into the opposite wall. Natsu panted hard, cheeks flushed, hair disheveled, and his clothes crumpled.

"Dammit, Gray! I invited you here so we wouldn't be tempted by being apart."

"Being with you is an even bigger temptation," Gray declared. "How can I feel your hot skin and not want to touch all of it?"

"Is sex all you care about?" Natsu yelled angrily.

"Like I said, it's not just about sex. Right now, we were doing nothing more than kissing, but you don't want Happy to see us doing even that. Are you ashamed?" he shouted.

"Of course not! That was way more than just kissing." Natsu blushed as he reached up to the aching bruise on his neck. "Bastard," he grumbled.

At that moment, Happy stepped out of the bathroom. He saw the tenseness of Gray's brow, the scowl on Natsu's face, and he had heard shouts. Innocently, he asked, "Are you two fighting?"

Gray watched as Natsu refused to even look at him. "Seems so," he answered softly. Then he turned and ran out of the house in frosty rage.

Natsu stayed on the couch, trying to calm himself. He had been struggling to hold back for days, and that fierce kiss almost undid all his restraint. Gray was right about one thing; living together did not make anything easier. The passion did not simmer just because they were beside one another all the time.

"Well," Happy huffed. "Aren't you gonna run after him?"

"Why should I?" Natsu grumbled.

"Because that's what a guy does when the person they like runs off in anger. He chases after them, apologizes, and they work things out. It happens like that in all the stories."

"He's the one being an idiot."

"Probably you both are," Happy pointed out.

Natsu realized his best friend was right. They were both being stubborn, and one of them had to be the first to say sorry. He knew Gray was awkward with real relationships. Despite having had many lovers, he had never let anyone close to his heart.

'You are the only person in my life who I've ever thought of as being my beloved. That's something that belongs to no one else but you, Natsu. You're the only person who has ever touched me this deeply.'

So Natsu realized he had to be the first to apologize. He ran out the door with Happy looking on proudly. Luckily, Gray had not gone far. He stood by a tree, leaning against the trunk, staring down the road that would take him into Magnolia.

Gray gazed down that road worn by Natsu and Happy walking into town every day. He had planned to run off, return to his apartment, and stay there for the rest of his time being sick. He did not want to fight with Natsu, but he really was getting frustrated. He could not even jack off in the shower because he feared the semen might infect the tiles and make Natsu or Happy sick.

"I really am getting messed up in the head over that guy," he grumbled to himself.

After a few moments, he heard crunching on the dirt path and the front door closing. He knew Natsu was coming forward, but he could not face him yet.

"Gray?" Natsu asked hesitantly.

Gray kept his eyes turned away, staring down the road that could take him away from temptation, but also away from the man he so desperately needed. "I didn't want to bring it up," he muttered. "I like living with you, Natsu. Really, I do. Maybe I'm the type of guy who doesn't do well around kids. Not the domestic sort, I guess." He laughed wryly. "And here I thought…" His words cut off sharply. Telling Natsu about his dreams of a future, that dream where Natsu declared he wanted a family with Gray, was too embarrassing. "Nothing," he mumbled.

Natsu looked amazed. "You thought you'd want a family?"

Gray folded his arms, half-hugging himself. "It's something I've thought about from time to time."

"But … not anymore?"

"Dammit, I don't know. Maybe if I slowly got used to the idea, but … suddenly having Happy around … and like I said, it's not just him. It's … it's…"

"It's me," Natsu answered for him. "I become self-conscious when Happy is around. I know I do. Happy … I dunno. He's sometimes like my best friend, sometimes like my own kid, all wrapped into one. He's … Happy! I'm not about to abandon him."

"No!" Gray cried out, finally turning around to look at him. "No, I wouldn't ask you to do that. It's just … I … I don't know," he growled in frustration. "If we do live together again like this, I'd rather do it at my place, and … and not with Happy."

Natsu spent a few moments thinking about it, but he nodded slowly. "I understand. Maybe living together just isn't right for us. At least, right now." His voice dropped more. "I guess."

"Natsu…" Gray reached forward and held that lowered face. "I still wanna be with you. I don't want to break up over something this minor. We can still date each other and have a lot of fun."

"I guess you're right. I mean, it's not like we're looking to settle down."

Gray pouted, pulled his hand back, and looked away. That was something he actually did want, though, deep down inside. "Yeah," he muttered. "I guess not." Or was this a trick question? "Unless … unless that's something you want."

"I don't know," Natsu answered honestly. "I don't really think ahead that far."

"Well, fine. Whatever you want," he replied, slightly snappish and instantly regretting it.

Natsu reached forward and grabbed Gray by the arm. His narrow eyes looked up beseechingly. "I want you, but Happy still needs me."

"Then it's pretty obvious," Gray muttered petulantly. "We're not ready to live together."

Natsu's fingers squeezed tighter, as if to keep him there. "Are you going to go home?"

Gray draped his hand over Natsu's warm touch. "No, I'll stay here. We could still spend nights together from time to time, just probably not constantly like this. Look, I'm sorry, really," he said earnestly. Then Gray sighed in frustration as he tried to sort out the chaos in his mind.

Natsu's lips twisted as he thought through some things on his own. "Would you want to stay if Happy wasn't around? I … I could always ask Lisanna if she wants to take him."

Even though he offered that, Gray could see Natsu did not look like this was something he wanted. He was just offering it as an alternative, but his lip stuck out at his unwillingness. It broke Gray's heart to see his boyfriend like that.

"Dammit, now I feel like a jerk forcing a dad to give up his kid. I don't want to do that. No, you stay here with Happy. I'll deal with it. I … I can deal with this."

"Are you sure?"

Gray nodded solemnly. "Only because I know I'm sick and I can't ravage you right here, right now. Otherwise, I think this would drive me crazy real quickly. Heh! We're both too wild when we're together," he said, trying to sound lighthearted. "Having a young person around … as a couple, we're not ready for that."

Natsu turned away with a sad face and muttered, "I guess not."

"Come on. Stop looking like that. What if we go on a date … with Happy?"

"Like what?"

"How about we let him pick?"

"Oh … okay," Natsu said, cheering up some.

"I'll try not to be so frustrated. I just really want you to myself, and I'm being greedy."

"I don't mind. I guess if it was the other way around and you had a little kid around, I don't know how I'd be. If one of your twenty-seven lovers suddenly popped up and said you're the daddy to her baby…"

"Oh God, that's like a nightmare," Gray moaned.

Natsu chuckled. "I'd probably be okay, but … I guess it would put a damper on things. I couldn't moan as loud."

Gray smiled, combing his fingers through Natsu's hair. "Yeah, I'd have to hide my kinky things better."

Natsu laughed again. They stared at one another for an aching moment of awkwardness.

Finally, Gray asked, "Are we good?"

"Yeah, we're good."

"I'm sorry if I'm greedy," Gray said quietly.

"And I'm sorry if asking you to come over here was greedy of me, not thinking it out completely, not realizing…" He gazed up at Gray with burning desire. "…how tempting it would be." Natsu's hands slid up Gray's chest, and he stepped closer to be right against him. With aching passion, he whispered, "I want you." He leaned forward, eyes lowered, lips relaxed, and kissed Gray on the mouth. "I want you so much."

Gray wrapped his arms around that hot body, but he hesitated kissing him back. "Natsu…"

Natsu refused to be denied. He reached into Gray's hair, pulled roughly, and forced his head down, kissing him fervently. He pressed Gray up against the tree he was leaning on, and he thrust against that taut, chilly body.

"Gray…" he moaned. Natsu thrust his tongue in, not waiting, and he devoured the wintermint taste. His hips made another hard thrust. He felt the bulge in Gray's jeans, and he ground himself against it, frotting against Gray, as if he could pierce him right against this tree.

Finally, Gray grabbed back, yanking Natsu to be as close as they could get. They were out in the open, sunlight and birdsong all around them. Kissing like this in the open made Gray shiver deep inside. Anyone could come up the road and see them. Happy might even be watching. Gray didn't care! He wanted people to watch. He wanted them to see the fiery passion that sparked between them. He felt his cock being stroked by Natsu's undulating hips, and he groaned right into Natsu's mouth.

Natsu pulled back just a little, and Gray saw the fierce lust that must have been simmering in the back of Natsu's libido, now whooshing forward like an inferno, ready to burn down everything. Gray sneered back, grabbed Natsu's ass, and yanked him close, invading with his tongue this time, wanting that hot cinnamon taste to tingle his mouth.

Natsu gasped as he felt passion overwhelming him. His whole body shivered for more. "Mmmm … G-Gray … nnnngh … touch me."

Gray moaned to hear those words again. "Oh, Natsu."

"Natsu?" called out a high voice.

The hand drifting across Natsu's belt, about to loosen it, yanked back. Natsu pulled away with a gasp, and Gray collapsed against the tree, struggling to hold back a flood of profanity.

Natsu wiped saliva from his mouth. "Okay, I get your point," he conceded.

"See," Gray growled, way more frustrated than before with the heat of that body still lingering on his skin.

Happy walked out onto the porch. "Natsu, I'm hungry."

Natsu tried to smile through the sudden denial of his needs. "Yeah, we … we were talking about getting something to eat. Weren't we, Gray?"

"Y-Yeah," the ice wizard said, keeping turned away from where Happy stood, knowing his erection was bulging in his pants, aching from being denied. "I think we should go to a restaurant, all three of us."

"We're going out to eat?" asked Happy.

"Yeah. Uh, my treat. It's the least I can do for you guys for taking care of me while I'm sick."

"Can we have fish?"

Finally, Gray turned around, giving the Exceed his most pleasant smile. "Happy, I'm going to let it be your choice where to eat."

The cat's round eyes went wide with excitement. "Really?"

He truly was cute, so much like a little kid. "Yep. You've been putting up with me being around, so it'll be your choice. Anywhere you wanna go, anything you wanna eat."

"Can I have any sort of fish I want?"

"Uh, so long as I can afford it." Gray realized that anything you want to eat was a dangerous thing to say to Natsu and Happy.

"I'll keep it reasonable." Then Happy glanced at the two with their flushed cheeks and swollen lips. He smirked slyly. "Are you two behaving yourselves?"

"Uh … sure we are," Natsu said cheerfully. However, he was leaning over oddly. "I'll … um … I'll be right back." He rushed past Happy and into the house.

Happy watched him hurry by. "Why is Natsu walking funny?"

"He … um … strained a muscle."

"Oh. I hope he's okay to walk into town. Are you okay, Gray? You're kinda leaning over funny."

Gray was slouched to hide the pole being smothered by his tight jeans. "It's … um … stomach cramp."

"Oh. Are you sure you want to eat?"

"Y-Yeah. Um … it's cramping because I'm…" His eyes lingered at the door where Natsu passed through. "…I'm hungry," he ended with a flustered sigh.

"You need to make sure you eat. Lots of food means lots of strength. That's what Natsu says. When he's hungry, he devours anything in sight."

Gray grumbled to himself, "Don't I know it!"

"You left your shirt in the bathroom. I'll go grab it, and then we can go into town."

"Yeah, thanks," he muttered. Happy left back inside, and Gray collapsed against the tree, pressing on his crotch to try and push away his arousal. "Ugh! Dammit."

It was so frustrating, all the things he wanted to do to Natsu but couldn't. At least they managed to avoid a fight. He did not want living together to turn into something that might divide them. He should not have said anything about Happy, but it was really a bother. Gray liked privacy and being able to do whatever he wanted. He did not like being restrained. Now, not only was his illness tying him down, but Happy's constant presence made him restrain himself. He could not take much more of this.

"I need to get drunk," he grumbled, although he knew he should not do something like that. It was how he had dealt with frustration in the past: get drunk, find someone for the night, work off his stress through sexual release, and sleep off the hangover. Now he had Natsu, but…

He couldn't work off what he needed!

And that was far more frustrating.


That night, Natsu could not sleep. The whole day, he had been going over the scene of his and Gray's little lover's spat. Realizing Gray was not completely happy living together was depressing. When he had lived with Gray, it had been amazing. Of course, Natsu was used to living with someone else, so it was better than sleeping alone at his house while Happy was out of town.

Although Natsu knew he would never give up his best friend for his boyfriend, deep down inside, he liked the idea that Gray was feeling greedy, wanting Natsu all to himself. He definitely would not like having to share Gray's attention with anybody else. He also had to agree with Gray that having Happy interrupt them was frustrating.

Just when it was getting good!

That ache never completely went away. All day, he had tried to ignore it. If he was a normal teenage male, he probably would have jacked off and felt better, yet Natsu knew he was anything but normal.

Gray had definitely changed him. Natsu usually liked feeling aroused but denying himself release. Now that denial of his lust was torturous. Instead of savoring the fact that he was aroused but could keep himself from giving in, he wanted—needed—the fire inside his loins to be extinguished.

Natsu rolled over in bed and wrapped his arms around Gray. He could hear by the ice wizard's breathing, he was not asleep either, and by the aroma tingling the air, Natsu could tell that Gray was also awake because he was aroused.

"Graaay," he whispered teasingly.

"Are you awake too?" Gray whispered in the darkness.

"Uh-huh." He propped up on an elbow to whisper into Gray's ear. "I'm hungry."

"Considering how much you and Happy ate, you shouldn't need food for a week, at least."

"Dinner was good, but…" His hot hand began to drift down. "I want dessert."

"N-Natsu," the ice wizard groaned in shock. Gray took that hand and gently pulled it away from his crotch. "You can't touch there yet."

Natsu pouted at being denied now that they were alone, and he could hear Happy snoring in the other room. "But I wanna," he insisted, and his hand tried to move down again.

Gray grabbed it firmly. "I know, and trust me, I definitely want you to, but … you can't! Not yet."

Natsu felt stubborn now, and he further drape himself over Gray's body. "But I wanna," he repeated, and with more force he reached down.

Gray grabbed his wrist. "Natsu," he whined in frustration. Hearing the Dragon Slayer's rapacious demands was too arousing. "Look, it's just a few more days. If you do anything and get sick, then I can't touch you for two more weeks. You don't want that, do you?"

Natsu flopped back down on his pillow. "No," he grumbled. He let out a hot puff of air in annoyance. "I kinda wish we had gotten sick together."

"W-What?" Gray cried out, barely keeping his voice down. The last thing he wanted was for Natsu to be sick at all.

"That way we could go through this together. Maybe if we were both sick, we could touch each other while going through medication together."

"I don't think it works that way."

Natsu pouted sullenly. "It's annoying!"

Gray rolled over and rested his head on Natsu's chest, hugging around that broad torso. "I know," he whispered, feeling deeply guilty. "I'm sorry."

"Gray, don't ever get sick like this again," Natsu demanded.

Gray laughed awkwardly. "Trust me, I have no plans to. Besides, I only want you. I won't get sick from you."

He rubbed lightly over Natsu's neck and heard in that hot chest a soft but sharp inhale as his fingers hit a sensitive spot. Gray watched how the moonlight shined on Natsu's chest, turning those bronze pecs silver. He lightly caressed his fingers up and down Natsu's torso, feeling the soothing heat and hearing within that chest, the thump-thump-thump of Natsu's heart beating faster.

For Natsu, those chilly fingers that were probably meant to ease him only made his desire burn hotter. Whenever Gray was gentle like this, it tingled Natsu's nerves. He felt goose bumps making the hair on his arms rise.

"G-Gray … um … I can't touch you, but … c-could you touch me?"

"Heh, sure," he smirked. "I washed my hands before going to bed, so I can do that much."

Gray's hand drifted down into the blankets, venturing across that hot body, until he reached Natsu's pajamas and a distinct hardness tenting the loose fabric. He palmed over the front, and a light touch was all it took for Natsu's spine to arch and his hips to flex up into those fingers.

"This isn't really fair, you know," Gray whispered, rubbing Natsu through his pajama pants. "You get all the pleasure."

Natsu felt a stab of guilt. "You … you don't have to."

"Are you kidding?" Gray lifted himself to look straight down into Natsu's moonlit face. "I love seeing you turned on."

Natsu decided not to point out that Gray managed to say love again in this sort of roundabout way. He figured that if he stopped pointing it out so much, maybe Gray would feel more comfortable saying that word in other situations; then maybe, slowly, they could work him into saying it romantically.

Gray eased his hand under the elastic band and slipped down again, feeling excessive heat and hearing a low gasp as Natsu trembled. God, yes, he loved watching Natsu fall to pieces under his hands! He loved this control he had over the Dragon Slayer. He loved…

Loved?

Gray pushed the initial fear out of his mind. He loved things about Natsu. Right now, he loved the hot hardness getting thicker within his grasp, and he loved the way Natsu's face drew up so exquisitely. Damn, he was sexy!

Those chilly fingers were so cold, they burned Natsu's skin, and that icy pain felt intensely pleasurable. Natsu's mouth opened wide so he could breathe heavier, but then as Gray's hand slipped the foreskin off the tip of his sensitive head, a moan shuddered out, and Natsu slapped a hand over his mouth, shocked by the sound. He heard an amused snort from Gray. Damn ice bastard! He was just too damn good.

"How much?"

That sensually low voice shot through Natsu's nerves. How much? If only he could have it all, everything, every single bit of pleasure that his body craved. How much? Anything was simply not enough compared to how much he really wanted.

"Probably … we…" Natsu knew they should not go too far, especially considering how he reacted when it came to sexual release, handling his fears and the past trauma. However, he could not fool himself. Although anguished, he had to confess, "I really need it."

Those dark eyes sparkled down at him, slightly amused, very much aroused. Natsu wondered what that smile meant. Was Gray also starting to realize the change to Natsu? Was he thinking back to their first few times together, how Natsu had to pretend he did not want it, how he had to tell himself it was forced just so he could give in? And now…

Now here he was, practically begging, desperate for release. Gray had healed part of that deep wound. Natsu's first orgasms had all been deeply shameful, physical defeats, horrifying and humiliating. He had grown up thinking such sexual release was losing to some invisible beast. He could not allow defeat; he had to fight it until he could not fight anymore. Now, with Gray, it was more like a victory that they fought to find together. It was no longer defeat, but success, reaching a goal together; and it was no longer shameful, but wonderful.

Once, he feared orgasm. Now, with Gray, he craved it like a drug.

"All right," Gray said reassuringly, stroking Natsu's hair as if to assure him that this sort of desire was okay. "We need some tissues, something to catch it. Ah! That is … would you be okay with tissues?" He looked startled by his own forgetfulness. He knew Natsu had a severe phobia of his semen being collected, and that was precisely what the tissues were for, to catch the mess and clean it away.

"They go in the trash, so it's fine." At least, that was what Natsu wanted to convince himself. He honestly was not sure if tissues would trigger him. He hoped not. He knew tissues were what normal boys used for late night sessions in bed. He wanted to be more normal.

"I can even flush the tissues down the toilet, so they go into the sewer," Gray offered, shifting around in bed. "Do you have a box?"

"Um, under the bed."

He hoped Gray would not think too much on that, but those droopy eyes shot right back to him so quickly, Natsu knew Gray was wondering precisely what he hoped he was not.

"You … you keep tissues under your bed?"

"That's normal, right?" he muttered.

"For guys who masturbate a lot, yeah. I … I thought you couldn't … you know…"

Natsu pouted. "I can't." Precisely the conversation he wanted to avoid! "I … kinda … I put them there when you first moved in, just in case."

Although he felt ashamed to admit that, Gray just chuckled and shook his head. "Horny little dragon," he muttered, flipping over the edge of the bed to look underneath. Although it was dark, the tissue box was right by the edge of the bed. Gray pulled it up and set it on a nightstand. "You were planning this, weren't you?"

Natsu blushed as he confessed, "I was hoping we could. We've never done it in my bed."

Gray paused and thought about it. Natsu was right. The one time he spent the night here, Happy had returned home the next morning, and Gray leaped out the window so he would not be discovered. "Your shower, though. That was hot."

Natsu moaned as he remembered that. "Mmmm, yeah. Although I barely had a chance to enjoy it."

Gray reached back under the blankets. "You came so fast that time," he whispered, and he felt the hot erection still waiting eagerly.

"I had been needing it for days, like now … nnngh!" He arched up into Gray's hand.

"I still liked it," Gray whispered into his ear. "I like overwhelming you."

"Ahhhh!"

"Shh. You gotta be quiet."

"Yeah, just … I really … really need it."

Gray smirked and stroked him more, rubbing from the top all the way down, then lightly caressing Natsu's balls before stroking all the way up again.

Natsu bit on his lip, but he could not hold it back. "Nnnnngh!"

"Shhhhh! Happy will hear you."

Natsu frowned, being reminded of Gray's frustration about living with someone else in the house. As Gray gave him gentler strokes Natsu hissed, "I don't like keeping quiet."

"Heh! But it's sexy watching you try, struggling like this. I love hearing you be loud, but Happy will wake up and wonder what's going on. We'll have to stop." Gray gave a mischievous grin down at his lover. "You don't want me to stop, do you?"

Natsu vehemently shook his head, afraid that if he opened his mouth, more moans would escape. Gray's hands always had a talent for stroking up every bit of pleasure from within him, and now, in the warmth and comfort of his own bed, Natsu felt even more relaxed, able to enjoy this more than the cold rooms of the ice wizard.

Gray nudged Natsu's pajamas down, pulling them just to his thighs so he could see that erection in the moonlight. His finger swiped up a tiny pearl of moisture, and he rubbed it onto his lips. Then he sensually licked it off, tasting the bitterness he had missed so much. Natsu's eyes widened.

"I have to be careful about my deep throat," Gray explained, leaning over that erect member, "but my lips are safe."

He kissed just the head. Then he looked up to Natsu and saw the fiery lust building in the starlit gaze. Gray smiled smugly and placed moist kisses all the way down Natsu's cock, ending with pecks to both balls. Then he gave Natsu's foreskin a light nip with his teeth.

"Ah…ahhhh!" Natsu's whole body tensed right up off the mattress.

"Seriously, I'm gonna have to gag you," he warned with a devious smile. "Are you sure you'll be able to do this? You can't be loud."

Natsu squirmed at the lack of touches. "Can't … can't help it."

"Try," Gray whispered, and he left off teasing with his mouth, only stroking again. "No noises. Don't you dare wake up Happy."

Natsu whimpered and covered his mouth with both hands. Still, as Gray sent pulses of pleasure through him, the moans got harder and harder to suppress. "D-Dammit," he squeaked. "I don't like keeping quiet."

Gray stopped his hand. He was ready to get frustrated, halted once again by the presence of a damn cat, but slowly a thought entered his mind. "What if we escape?"

Natsu felt confused and a bit irked. "All the way to your place? I don't wanna wait that long."

"No, just outside."

"Out- … -side?"

"Natsu, you live in the middle of a forest. Let's go out for a little bit."

Natsu's eyes went wide. "Out into the forest?"

"Uh-huh."

"Out … into the open?"

Gray's eyes gleamed dangerously, and he said again with forceful lust, "Uh-huh!"

Natsu shuddered at the thought of it. Out in the forest, their sounds would fade away into the noises of nature. Out in the forest, they would be in the midst of nature, where animals rutted all the time. They would be just like the forest creatures, horny and wild, mating and claiming one another … like animals!

That thought aroused a bestial side to him. A dragon and a snow leopard! Out in the midst of nature! Rutting animals! Wild mating! He knew he was grinning manically.

Then he remembered that Gray had an issue with kinkiness in public.

"Would you be okay with that?"

"It's after midnight and we're in the middle of nowhere. It's not like anybody will be out there to see us."

"I guess not." Natsu leaned up, grinning wildly into Gray's face. "All right. Let's go!"

They scrambled off the bed, Natsu yanked his pajamas back up, and they jumped out the window to avoid waking Happy.

Chapter Text

Natsu and Gray ran into the forest, eager to get away, enjoy some privacy, and finally act out their desires. Natsu knew the best place to go, down a steep dell where their sounds would not echo back toward the house. He grabbed Gray's hand and led him along pitch black forest trails. When Gray stumbled in barefoot awkwardness, Natsu flamed up his hand to light the path.

As soon as they were in the dell, Natsu slammed Gray up against a tree and kissed him hard. They had been like this just that morning. Now, they could be wild. All around him, Natsu heard the din of the forest. He smelled the soil, trees, leaves, flowers, the scents of animals, but mostly he just wanted to smell Gray, that musky arousal that wafted up from him, so potent now, built up over many days.

Gray leaned back against the tree, letting Natsu do whatever he wanted. He just stood there, enjoying it all, how Natsu's hot hands undid his shirt, shoving it off Gray's shoulders. The ice wizard could have undressed quicker, but he loved the feel of Natsu's urgency, struggling to get those pajamas off, wanting that contact, skin against skin … desperate for it.

Natsu's mouth went off Gray's lips, along his jawbone, down his neck, and to the collarbone.

"Don't bite me," Gray warned.

"You hardly leave the house," he pointed out. Natsu's nails began to scrap softly over Gray's skin, and the Dragon Slayer moaned with wanton desperation, "I wanna mark you."

"No," Gray said firmly. "Not up there. Not where people can see."

Natsu thrust his body up against Gray and snarled hungrily. "Then where?"

Gray loosened the drawstring on his pajama bottoms and dropped them and his boxers to the forest floor. "My hip. So long as I keep my underwear on, no one will see it. Bite me there, but don't draw blood, and don't get close to … to that area. You still can't touch there, so … so just my hip."

Natsu knelt before Gray, crunching down on a soft but prickly carpet of dry leaves. It was so tempting, seeing that semi-erection in front of him with a pearly drop shining in the moonlight. He really wanted to touch it, stroke it, play with it, kiss it, suck it, but he behaved himself. He rubbed Gray's body from pectorals, down the abs, and down to the hips. He remembered that Gray liked that feeling, rubbing all the energy to one area, so his hands went down to Gray's knees and slowly caressed up. He could see Gray really getting turned on from these teasing touches.

Just a few more days, he kept telling himself. Just a few more.

Four more days, and he could do whatever he wanted. In a week, they would tell the guild. Everyone would know. No more hiding. No more feeling guilty. He wanted to whole guild—no, the whole world—to know.

He wanted Gray … so much.

His teeth bared, and he bit into Gray's hip. The ice wizard cried out in pain, and he snagged his fingers in Natsu's pink hair, wanting to pull him away, wanting to draw him in closer. Natsu made sure not to break skin, but he knew the chomp would leave little bruises in the shape of teeth, two sets, gnawed right into his bony hip.

Feeling satisfied with marking his lover, Natsu rose with a smug smile, especially when he saw the grimace of pain in Gray's tightened face. He pressed his chest up against that cold skin, but he was careful. He did not press down there, and he could see that Gray's hands were ready to push him back, just in case.

Gray was in anguish. He really wanted to be wholly with Natsu. This was so, so dangerous. Especially with pre-cum already built up on his arousal, part of him realized how easy it would be for Natsu to shift his body the wrong way and rub against that, with all its infection. He shouldn't do this—he really shouldn't—but … he needed it. He could not even last three days without craving Natsu desperately.

"I'll touch you and myself," Gray told him. "Stay to the side. I don't want you getting near this. Also, once I touch myself, I can't touch you with this hand. Goddammit, I should have brought gloves and a condom." He gritted his teeth in anger. He was usually always prepared for sexual encounters. Now, this was so sudden, a spur-of-the-moment desperation, and he had brought nothing at all. Hell, he left the house in pajamas and shoeless. "You don't have any condoms in your house, y'know that!" he snapped to hide his shame at not thinking this through more carefully.

Natsu nibbled Gray's shoulder. "Did you look?"

Gray had to laugh. "Yeah, I kind of checked."

"Naughty, naughty! Looking through my things."

"Well, I didn't bring anything from home like that," Gray argued in self-defense. "I really thought I could just not do anything for a few days but … God, Natsu, I need you!"

Natsu's eyes glittered deviously at the moan in Gray's voice. So sexy! Hearing this renown philanderer succumbing and defeated in his own game—and by a total novice, no less—amused Natsu and made him smug.

"I know," he whispered, caressing those cold cheeks. "I need you, too. Desperately!" He leaned up into Gray's ear. "You've ruined me."

Gray chuckled arrogantly. Yes, he probably really had ruined Natsu. How was the guy ever supposed to find pleasure in another person after being spoiled like this? The same went for himself. How could he possibly be satisfied with anyone whose body did not burn him up the way the Fire Dragon Slayer did?

"Now, touch me already," Natsu demanded.

Gray ignored him and rubbed over Natsu's rippling muscles, gazing at the moon shadows and argent starlight reflecting on the bronze skin. Then his fingers tweaked Natsu's nipples, earning a sharp gasp.

"Have you been touching yourself?" asked Gray.

"Nnngh … only … ah! Only a little. I can't … nnngh … can't touch myself all the way. I just … can't do that."

"You've told me before," Gray assured softly, easing Natsu away from thinking about his limitations. He did not want that angst again, not this time. "That just means you're built up more for me." He kissed Natsu and stared into his dazed eyes. "Are you ready?"

"Yes. Please."

"Please what?" Gray smirked slyly.

Natsu felt a chill in his arms. Even here, out in the wild, with Natsu taking a slightly more aggressive role, Gray was showing who was truly the owner. "Please … kainushi," he whispered, begging shamelessly.

"God, I love hearing you call me that." Gray leaned into Natsu's ear. "My beloved."

Natsu gasped. He began to kiss Gray's neck fervently, but he felt the ice wizard pull away a little. Oh, right … no visible marks. Everyone in the guild knew by now that Natsu had offered to let Gray stay with him while Gray went through the last of his treatment. If Gray had a hickey, their precarious plan would be ruined. So Natsu thrust his hips up against Gray, pressing him tighter against the tree, only to have the ice wizard shift away.

"Careful. Don't get too close. Stay right here. If you need to thrust against something, thrust against my hip, not … not there. Not my groin. Okay?"

"Y-yeah," Natsu nodded. "I want your hand, Gray. Come on!"

"Okay. No more teasing." Gray reached down and stroked him softly.

Natsu shuddered at the cold touch to such a hot area. "Ahh! Yes! I need that."

Natsu thrust himself into Gray's waiting hand. The ice wizard hardly had to stroke at all. Natsu was doing all the work. He let his fingers tighten, flex, experimenting with how to hold Natsu best.

Here in the forest, Natsu opened his mouth and moaned as loudly as he wanted. It was so liberating, no fears about Happy, no self-conscious realization that Gray's neighbors could hear them, no one but them, wrapped in a sylvan world of soil, leaves, and stars. Out here, he could be as loud as he wanted, and he roared out as finally Gray touched him the way he needed it.

"I like this," Gray muttered in a daze.

"Hmmm?" Natsu was so caught up with sensations of pleasure, all sounds had gone slightly muffled.

"You thrusting at me like this. I like it."

Natsu slowed down and gave a slower, longer thrust. "Do you mean like this?"

"Yesss." Gray hissed at that slow yet powerful motion. "Try imagining that it's me."

"Idiot. I already am. This is what I wanna do to you some day. It's what I dream about."

"You dream about topping me?"

Those slanted eyes gazed up fiercely in the moonlight. "Every damn night, especially when you're in bed with me. I don't think I'm ready yet, but … I hope soon."

"Then we'll make that a goal," Gray smiled with encouragement. "This is a good start. Imagine it and thrust at me, you wild dragon!"

Natsu slammed his hips against Gray's hip so hard, the elbow to the hand holding him crashed into the tree behind Gray.

"Hold your hand just like that," Natsu whispered. "More stability that way, less strain on your wrist. Plus I can feel the skin of your hip when I'm pressed in close." When he pushed into Gray's hand again, his hip brushed against the icy hip, and his left thigh was flush against Gray's left thigh, still to the side of Gray's body, but half up against him. "Yes, like that. Squeeze tighter, like it's your ass."

"You'll come too quickly."

"I need to learn how to last long enough. Otherwise, the first time I bang you, I'm gonna explode in two seconds."

Gray tightened the circle made by his thumb and forefinger, squeezing it to mimic the ring of muscles circling an anus. Natsu groaned at the tightness, and his thrusts slowed down as he realized how much more intense it felt.

"Just like being in your ass."

"You were in my ass once," Gray reminded with an amused smile.

"I don't like remembering that. I freaked out."

"Too bad, because I can still remember how you felt, that heat inside me, that burning pain as you entered me…"

"Gray, seriously, shut up," Natsu snapped angrily. "I don't want to remember it because I always remember what happened later."

"Oh. S-sorry."

Natsu collapsed his head onto Gray's shoulder to hide his frustration. "No, I'm sorry. I did like it. It's just … it was my first time being inside someone, and I messed it all up. It's … humiliating, remembering how badly I freaked out."

Gray rubbed his knuckles over Natsu's cheek, coaxing him away from the angst. "It'll be awesome next time."

"I hope so," the Dragon Slayer mumbled sullenly.

"You just need practice. Make it awesome now. Thrust at me. Show me what you want to do to me."

Natsu's eyes turned up, and the fire was rekindled in them. "I wanna do everything to you!" Natsu dived at Gray's neck. The ice wizard feared he might bite, but instead Natsu's lips fluttered from the shoulder up to Gray's ear. He snarled salaciously, "I wanna fuck you so hard!"

With a gasp, Gray took himself into his right hand and stroked to match Natsu's thrusts.

"I wanna taste every part of your body. Everything." He licked behind Gray's ear, getting a gasp of shock. "I wanna bite you." He nipped the chilled earlobe. "Scratch you." His nails clawed along the back of Gray's neck. "Ravage you!"

Gray moaned and leaned his head back against the tree trunk, both feeling the familiarity of his own hand, and the carnal pummeling of Natsu's hot cock into his other hand.

"This has been torture," Natsu exclaimed.

"Yeah, definitely," Gray had to agree.

Natsu cracked an eye open, feeling guilty. "I shouldn't have asked you to stay with me."

"No, I like living with you. Being apart from you was torture, too. Being with you … it's heaven! And it's hell," he sneered. "Because I can't have you like this."

Natsu choked on his saliva as he panted heavily. "Nnnngh! G-Gray." He stiffened up. "I … I won't last long."

"I know. Me neither."

"Ice me!"

"Ice … oh, restraints," Gray realized. For a second, he had forgotten that Natsu still needed that. "Where … where can I…? Oh hell."

"What?" Natsu asked in worry.

"We don't have a headboard. There's nothing to ice you to."

Natsu glanced around the dark woods. Gray was right. They usually had the headboard, pipes, something. Now, there but nothing but … ah!

"You're an idiot. We're in the middle of a frigging forest. You could ice me to any one of these trees."

"Huh?"

"Put me against the tree. Here." Natsu pulled Gray aside and took his place, edging his spine up into the line of warmth Gray had made in the tree trunk. Then he put his arms above his head with his wrists crossed. "Freeze my arms right to the tree."

Gray took a moment to look at Natsu's naked body in the moonlight, his cheeks flushed, his lips swollen, narrow eyes glazed in lust, and how he presented himself, ready like a sacrifice to some rustic god. And … Gray was that god. Natsu wanted to give up his freedom to Gray, and to Natsu, freedom was life. Gray was about to take his "life," steal that freedom, and ravage him as much as he could, right here in this sacred grove.

Gray slammed his hand against Natsu's wrists, breathing heavily with desire, snarling at this eager sacrifice. Slowly, frost crackled from his hand and spread over Natsu's wrists. The Dragon Slayer flinched and instinctively pulled at the chill. Gray tightened the hold, freezing slowly, dragging out the icy torture, until finally Natsu's hands were trapped to the trunk of the tree.

"Perfect," he purred in salacious satisfaction. "I like you like this, standing up. Oh God, you're sexy," he exclaimed.

Gray dived in and thrust his mouth against Natsu's lips, covetously claiming them. He bit those ardent lips hard enough to draw a bit of blood. Natsu gasped as he tasted his own blood trickle from the nip.

"Ahhh … G-Gray. Lick. Lick it. My blood." His brain refused to work as he tasted the sweet coppery flavor of his own arousal, tangy in his blood.

Gray sucked on Natsu's lower lip, tasting the blood. "You're torturing me," he growled. "I want you … so much!"

"Touch me," Natsu demanded. "Make me come, Gray. Then I … I wanna watch and touch you, touch everywhere I can, while you stroke yourself. I … I can't do that when I'm like this. I don't trust myself still, so … first, make me come."

"Seriously, stop being this sexy or I won't be able to hold back." Gray reached down and began stroking Natsu's arousal. "So, you wanna watch me?"

"Mm-hmm!" Natsu whimpered, shuddering at the agile fingers pumping firmly.

"Then I'm gonna make this fast, because I need it." He stroked firmer, root to tip, jerking Natsu roughly.

"That's … nnngh … fine 'cuz … oh, aaaaah … not gonna … last … ah!" His head arched up as all of his muscles began to tighten, all focus drawing inward and downward. "Ah, Gray!"

"I'm right here," Gray said soothingly, watching that blissfully tortured face with fascination.

"N-n-n-neck!" Natsu sputtered out, feeling the impending release. "Need … need you to bite me. Really … need that. Gaah, please, bite me!"

"Are you almost ready?"

Natsu nodded frantically as panting and loud moans were all that could leave his throat.

"You're really…"

"Stop! No teasing. Gonna … come … please!" he screamed, nearly in tears from the need for release.

"All right," Gray whispered.

He bit Natsu on the neck in a spot where his scarf would hide the bruise. Instantly, Natsu cried out to the stars, loud and animalistic. Gray felt jolting throbs through the shaft in his hand, and he heard a splash on the leaf-strewn forest floor. Natsu's whole body trembled, and his throat went hoarse from shouting. Slowly, the howls turned into moans, and then sighs panted out heavily from his lungs. At last, Natsu's head fell to his chest as his body went limp, held up only by the ice.

"God, I needed that so badly," he muttered wearily. He laughed in exhaustion. He could smell it: his cum had marked his scent in this area, like a wild animal marking territory. He was just like some creature of nature, and that untamable freedom felt invigorating. "Did you break skin?"

"Uh…" Gray looked at the neck. He had actually not bitten all that hard. It was a little pink, but that was all. "No, it's fine."

Instead of sounding relieved, Natsu grunted in frustration and disappointment. "Fine. I still liked it, but … harder next time, okay?"

Gray was mildly amused. Did Natsu want him to bite hard enough to break the skin? Then he recalled sleepy mutterings one day.

'It's fine to break skin. Do it with your teeth. It marks us as a mating couple. Already tasted your blood. Then … you taste mine. Teeth … marking us … my mmmmate … coup-…-ple…'

Although Natsu had been half-asleep when he said it, Gray realized that Natsu thought highly of such an exchange. Maybe another time, he would try to bite hard enough to pierce.

"Gray, you've messed me up."

"Heh! That's my line. Now…" He pulled his hand away and shook off some drops of semen. Then the icy bondage trapping Natsu shattered to snow. "My turn, bastard."

"Lean against the tree, like you were." Natsu moved off the trunk, and Gray took his place, resting his weight against the solid tree. Natsu pressed Gray up against it until Gray felt the bark carving marks in his back. "You're sexy like this."

Gray already reached down to hold himself, mostly to make sure Natsu did not rub against his crotch. Natsu was careful, though. His hands rubbed over Gray's chest, palming his nipples, up his neck, and into his hair, pulling at the strands slightly as his tongue plunged in for a rough kiss.

Gray groaned, and his wrist sped up. "I love the feel of your hands. So hot!"

Natsu noted briefly that again, Gray said love. Maybe when he was overwhelmed, his phobia vanished a little. In that case, the Dragon Slayer wanted to completely conquer Gray, inundate him and submerge all his fears with a flood of emotions … a deluge of love. He rubbed his spent cock up against Gray's hip, wiping a few of the remaining drops onto Gray's skin, marking him. His hands began to drift down, just to rub that scent around, but Gray panicked.

"No! Don't touch down there. Please, seriously, don't."

"I wasn't going to touch…"

"Natsu, please!" he cried out.

"Just your hip, Gray," he explained calmly.

"It's … scaring me. We're being so … so reckless. Dangerous. I don't want to chance getting you sick. Just don't make me scared. Don't touch anything below my waist, nothing at all. Don't even get near it."

Natsu moved his whole body over, standing to Gray's side rather than more in front of him. He saw the pale shoulders loosen up, and Gray nodded to show that this was better for him. Although Natsu wanted more from Gray, and he hated to be told not to do things he wanted to do, he realized that Gray was only worrying about him out of love, so he respected the restrictions Gray was laying down for them.

Gray, however, battled between what he knew he should do—stop Natsu completely and protect him—and what he wanted to do—fuck Natsu senseless right here in the middle of the woods.

"I want to feel you touch me. Really, I do," he gnashed in anguish. "So touch me everywhere else. Touch me everywhere, Natsu," he begged. "Everywhere but there. I need to feel your hands on me. I need it!"

Natsu picked up the hand Gray had used to touch him, and he caressed his muscular arm. "Like this?"

"Mmm, yeah," Gray moaned.

"You're messy." Natsu held up Gray's wrist and moistly licked his fingers. "I have to clean my mate."

"Heh," Gray panted in a weary laugh. "You're the messy one."

Natsu suddenly thrust his mouth down on Gray's fingers, taking two of them deep into his mouth. Gray instantly thrust on his own cock and cried out at the vicarious pleasure. Then Natsu slowly sucked up, and Gray's wrist mimicked it. When Natsu pulled off, Gray whined, as if Natsu had released his cock as well.

"You have a finger fetish, Gray," he pointed out, teasing slightly as his hands stroked the ice wizard's chest. "Chalk up another onto your list, eh?"

"Never … nnngh … never thought about … ahhh … fingers before."

"Did I discover something new about you?" Natsu smirked. He leaned in and licked Gray's neck. "I want to discover more. I wanna know more about you than anyone else has ever known."

Gray barked out a strained laugh. "Already … do … bastard. Ahhh! Your hands. Wanna feel them. Everywhere."

Natsu caressed over Gray's chest again. "Even … here?" He twisted both nipples at the same time. Gray's whole body arched up against the tree trunk. "You're so sensitive here."

"You haven't played with them in a while."

"Should I now?" Natsu leaned over and sucked one nipple while tugging the other.

Gray cried out loudly. "Oh God, Natsu!" That burning mouth felt so intense on his body that had been denied for days.

"Your smell is really strong," Natsu noted. He left off the nipples and rubbed his hands all over, warming up Gray's skin. "It's stronger than usual. Have you been naughty in my shower?"

"N-no, I haven't," Gray groaned.

"Have you been naughty at all?"

Gray felt himself flush at such a humiliating question. "Not really."

"Not really?" he smirked. "So you've been a little bad?"

"Just … just a little. I was afraid … to come … but … nnngh … but still touched."

"Denying yourself?" Natsu asked in amusement. Gray nodded, too tense to speak. "Are you all saved up?" Again, Gray could only nod his head. "Good." Natsu leaned up into Gray's ear and whispered hotly, "I wanna milk it out of you." He felt the shudder in Gray's body. "I wanna watch you explode."

"Natsu!" Gray choked out. Those devilish words were pushing him forward so fast. Damn, Natsu had one hell of a sexy voice when he talked like that!

"I love to see how you squirm, especially when you're built up like this. You get so large."

He looked down at the erection. Indeed, when Gray was denied for a while, the veins on his shaft stuck out a little more, a minor change, but the smell … definitely, the smell was different between when he was sated but still aroused, and when he was denied and desperate. God, he wanted to grab Gray and stroke him roughly until he felt the surges of lust spill out over his fingers. He could already smell leaking pre-cum and hear the moistness slurping over Gray's own hand. It smelled intoxicating, and it took a large amount of self-control to keep Natsu from touching where he should not. He knew he had to distract himself and focus back on Gray's face, not his cock.

"Do you like being outdoors, Gray?"

For a second, the rhythm of Gray's wrist faltered. The question stunned him. Outdoors?

Natsu caught that startled expression. As he figured, Gray had lost himself in the moment, forgetting where they were. "We're out in the open," he pointed out. "Technically, we're in public."

Gray gasped. He realized Natsu was right. He had almost forgotten that they were in the forest. Natsu's house was just a few minutes away. All of Magnolia was just down the hill on the other side of the woods. Suddenly, he realized the chirping of a frog, the buzz of insects, the sound of the wind in the trees. Outdoors! In the open! His body shuddered, and the exhibitionist in him was dancing pirouettes of joy, twisting Gray's lower stomach.

"Anyone could come by. A hunter out for nocturnal game. A fisherman walking to the river for an early day of fishing. Someone simply out for a midnight stroll. A whole family camping, parents and children. Maybe even other lovers somewhere out here in the woods. People could hear you."

"N-Natsu…"

"Anyone could walk by and see us," Natsu whispered, enthralled by the tension and twisted pleasure in Gray's face.

"Ahhh … n-no."

Gray's knees went weak. He almost collapsed, but Natsu thrust him up against the tree by the pressing firmness of his own body.

"Exhibitionist," Natsu smirked, amused at Gray's strong response. "Out in the open. I bet someone has already heard you, Gray. I bet they heard your sexy cries. Maybe they turned away, but … maybe they're watching. Maybe they're looking at you, right now, getting excited from the show we're giving them. What sort of face are you showing them, Gray?"

Gray knew deep inside that Natsu would have stopped if he smelled anyone approaching, but the thought of it—the mere possibility that someone might be out there in the dark woods, hiding behind a tree, watching this display, gazing at Gray's shuddering body in the moonlight, even getting aroused by Gray's sexual moans—overwhelmed him.

What would they see? What would they hear?

He cried out even louder, and this time he listened to his voice echo through the dell and return to him, a moan ladened with sensuality and carnal need. If someone really was out there, that was the sound they were hearing. Someone could be listening in. Someone could be jerking off to Gray's moans.

And that turned him on even more!

"Na- … ahhhh … Natsu!"

Gray's toes curled into the soil under him. His hand felt himself get even harder. From balls to flared tip, it all tingled as he felt like everything within him was rushing to escape. His body was drawing closer, closer, teetering on the edge. He wanted to hold on to this feeling, and he wanted to let it all break loose. He panted fast, straining to keep himself right in this moment when he felt most alive, and yet on the brink of death.

Natsu saw Gray was close—very close—and he leaned up into the flushed ear. Softly, sensually, he ordered, "Come for me, Gray."

That whispered demand snapped Gray apart completely. He felt himself gush out, heard the drops hit the dry leaves, and felt his head go light, as if caught up in the stars. Everything was fuzzy, blurry, and muted. He could have been screaming, sobbing, lights from heaven could have shone down in celestial glory, yet nothing mattered, nothing but the fiery heat beside him and the sound of Natsu breathing in his ear.

Natsu watched that final moment. He loved that he could mess Gray up like this. He loved the cries, the panting, the dazed euphoria, and the smell. He had already marked this area with his semen. Now Gray had also marked it. His scent was everywhere. Natsu knew, this dell would always be special to him now. They had consecrated it with their love.

Gray's teary eyes gazed up in weary amazement. "Natsu…" The word crackled dryly in his parched throat.

Those narrow eyes caught the moonlight in just the right way to make them appear to glow silver, like a beast of the forest. The glare in them made Gray gasp in surprise. As if for the first time, he realized just what a wild thing a Dragon Slayer truly was. Natsu was anything but a timid, passive, submissive lover. He was a beast caged within a prison of fears and doubts.

Yet still, Natsu wanted more.

"Get well quickly, Gray. Dammit, I wanna ravage you … so hard!" he snarled. "Four more days!"

Now, Gray felt like the submissive one, and those were his orders. Get well!

"When you're well…" Natsu growled. He suddenly grabbed Gray's jaw and held his face tightly. "…I want you to screw me senseless, until I can't even sit."

Gray was shocked out of his timid moment. Instead, he felt the control returning to him. "Oh don't worry." He leaned forward and bit Natsu's lip again, dragging it between his teeth. Then he leered into those wild eyes. "I will!" He chuckled, glad Natsu was letting him stay in charge, at least for a while longer. Gray stretched slightly as the post-coital weariness made him sleepy. "God, I needed that!"

"Are you going to feel better now? You were rather cranky about Happy."

Gray still rested his head against the tree as his body buzzed. "Yeah, sorry about that. Sexually frustrated, I guess."

"Yeah, I was starting to feel the same way. I'm tempted to tell Happy to just scram, at least for a couple hours."

Gray only hummed at that, too tired to think straight. He did not want to admit he had also been tempted to tell the little Exceed to get lost, go into town, or send him on useless errands.

Natsu leaned forward and kissed him. "I love you, Gray," he whispered. "Really. I love you so much, it's driving me crazy."

"Same here. It's addicting."

Natsu laughed and rubbed his nose up and down Gray's cold nostrils. "Addicted to sex, huh?"

"No." With his safe hand, Gray reached forward and stroked Natsu's hair. "Addicted to you, to your warmth, to the feel of your hands … to your taste."

He pulled Natsu's head in and kissed him. Natsu groaned as the bloodied bite on his lip knocked against his teeth. Gray did not give in, though. He kissed harder, overwhelming Natsu until the Dragon Slayer moaned out his name.

Gray wrapped an arm around Natsu and pulled him close, just to feel that warmth. "I would almost say let's go for a second time, but it's late and you're probably cold."

"No, I'm fine," Natsu assured him. "I guess you wouldn't be cold, huh?"

"Are you kidding?" He grinned deviously. "I feel hot."

Natsu hummed and chuckled, amused and enthralled. "Horny snowflake," he teased.

"This is one tired snowflake," Gray admitted, and he leaned back to rest himself. "This is nice, though, being out in the open like this."

"We should try it again."

Gray chuckled exhaustedly. "Who's the horny one now?"

"Whaaat?" Natsu grinned innocently. "I could tell you liked it."

"Yeah," he confessed. "Gotta admit, I've never had sex in a forest before."

Natsu decided to ignore a slight sting as he momentarily wondered what sorts of places Gray had used for sex, considering the guy was strict about being kinky in public. Instead, he went around collecting Gray's clothes and dusting off the leaves, while Gray slowly recovered from the orgasmic rush. Then, with his eyes closed in weariness, Gray felt something pushed against his chest. He cracked an eye open and saw Natsu handing him his pajamas.

"Can I walk back naked?"

"I'm used to it with you," Natsu pointed out.

"Don't wanna dress. Too much effort."

"You big baby."

"No, you're too good. Built up for too long. Shot out too much. Damn, I'm exhausted."

"Wimp." Natsu pulled his pajamas on. "Come on, walk. I'm not carrying your lazy ass back. One foot in front of the other. Watch out for the mess, don't step in it."

Gray followed where he was pulled, wanting sleep more desperately than he had felt in a long time.

"When we get back, you're cuddling me," Natsu insisted.

"No, I'm sleeping."

"Cuddle me while you sleep."

"How about you cuddle me for a change?"

Natsu looked back, slightly stunned, but he saw that Gray really was half asleep. The way he walked with his eyes nearly closed was adorable, and it made Natsu smile in sympathy. He stopped, bent over slightly, and suddenly lifted Gray into his arms.

The sleepiness was shocked right out of Gray's brain. "Wait, what…?"

"Shut up, you're heavy," Natsu grumbled. "But you're practically asleep, and it's my fault, so I'm responsible for making sure you get back home safely."

"Re- … Responsible?"

Gray knew his face must have turned purplish-red with embarrassment, and he was glad Natsu was more focused on the forest trail and not on him. He did not fight the hold, and instead, after a minute of sullen frowning, he slowly wrapped his arms around Natsu's neck, nuzzling into the jagged scar. Natsu had left home without even his muffler, and Gray rarely had a chance to lean against that narrow, bare neck. Natsu's neck felt so skinny, his collar so bony, without the scaly scarf there to pad him.

Natsu smiled to himself as he felt Gray relaxing. Gray's cold breath tickled his neck, but he did not complain. He heard soft, nearly silent sighs of contentment, and that was enough for him.

Finally, they reached the house. Gray thought Natsu would sneak in through the window, just as they had run off. Instead, he went to the main entrance and kicked the door open.

"Carrying my bride over the threshold," Natsu teased as he triumphantly walked inside.

"W-what?" Gray screamed. "Like hell I'm your bride! Put me down, bastard." He squirmed so much, Natsu dropped him flat on his butt.

"Sheesh! And here I was looking forward to carrying you to bed and everything."

Happy yawned, and his large, round eyes shined in the moonlight, lying on his hammock in the main room. "What are you two doing?"

Gray choked up. He had no clue how to explain this to Happy, and he stuttered as he tried to think of something.

Natsu thumbed down to Gray. "Stripper-idiot here was sleepwalking in the woods. He was so out of it, I had to carry him back."

Happy fully believed that. "Gray, sleepwalking is dangerous. Plus you're naked. You could have really frightened someone."

Gray gawked up at Natsu. He had just lied to Happy without a moment of hesitation. Why was he covering for them both? He could have just told Happy they went for a stroll together.

"Get to bed," Natsu told Gray. "Are you thirsty?"

"Um, just water," he muttered. He was still stunned, but he realized that his throat was painfully parched from all the panting and moaning.

Slowly, Gray picked himself up from the floor and walked to the bathroom first. He carefully cleaned himself, not only mud on his feet, but under the foreskin. Then he sterilized his hands. While he carefully washed, Natsu opened the bathroom door and tossed in his boxers.

"Fresh pair," he said curtly, and then shut the door to give Gray privacy.

Gray mumbled to himself, "You're spoiling me."

He washed, dressed, and then went to the bedroom. Natsu was sitting up with a nearly empty glass of water for himself and another waiting for Gray.

"I put some honey in it," he said. "I figured your throat might be raw. Mine sure is," he laughed.

Gray mumbled thanks. Again, Natsu went a step beyond what Gray expected. He drank the water in one chug, while Natsu merely sipped his. Gray fidgeted on the bed, wishing Natsu would drink faster and turn off the light. Sitting by him now felt strangely awkward.

"Are you okay?" Natsu asked in worry.

Gray stared ahead with his mind in an odd void. "Why did you lie to Happy?"

"Huh? I didn't. Seriously, you were sleepwalking."

"I was walking while drowsy. That's totally different from sleepwalking."

"Oh. I didn't know. Well, I thought that's what sleepwalking was, walking when you're half asleep, so I didn't lie. I just didn't get it right."

Natsu's prattling irked Gray, so he snapped what was truly on his mind. "Do you really think of me as your bride?"

"What? Oh, what I said earlier. No, I was just teasing you. Sorry, I didn't mean to offend you."

"What do you consider me as?" he asked sternly.

Natsu blinked in surprise, wondering what was up with the sudden foul mood. "You're my mate."

Gray's head snapped over to him with narrowed eyes. "What does that even mean?"

"It means … ummm…" Natsu thought about it. He understood the meaning perfectly fine, but he guessed it might be confusing to people who were not raised by a dragon. "It means you're mine, and I'm yours, and we take care of each other."

"How far does that go?"

"How … far?" he asked in confusion. "What do you mean?"

"On the relationship scale, where does being a mate land?"

"I didn't even know there was a scale." Still, although Gray was acting snappy, Natsu wanted the ice wizard to understand how he felt. "A mate is probably more than boyfriends. I think it even goes beyond lovers."

"Like, married?"

"No, that's different, but … well … just below that, maybe. I don't know!" Natsu shouted. "I just know you're my mate. You're … mine. And I want you to stay mine. Why? Are you mad I said that? I was just teasing you. Sheesh!"

Gray kept his eyes down, looking at the empty glass in his hand. "We're not ready for that," he muttered.

"Huh? Ready for what? What are you talking about?" Natsu set his glass on the nightstand and took Gray's glass out of his hand, putting it aside. "Did I say something bad? Please, tell me."

Gray smiled lightly. "You said nothing bad, Natsu. Just, calling me your bride, even as a joke … and … and wanting me to bite and break your skin. A mated couple, you once called it. Do you … do you want that?"

"Of course," Natsu answered without hesitation.

"So how is that different from what we have now? If I bite you and break your skin, what changes? I bit your lip until it bled tonight. Does that count? What counts? I'm trying to figure this out," he explained, feeling overwhelmed. "You want something, and I don't understand it."

"Come here." Natsu laid back on the pillows and pulled Gray to lie on his chest. Natsu's arms held the ice wizard in a warm, protective shield. "We're mates. Maybe you can call that lovers. With dragons, they can take that another step: a marked mating couple. It means they want no one other than the one who has their mark. Going steady, an exclusive couple, whatever you want to call it. It's one step above just being mates. The mark needs to be done with purpose, and with the mind frame of making a claim. The two mates bite one another and lick the blood. It needs to pierce skin: neck, shoulders, back. Legs, maybe. Not the lips, though, nor ears. It needs to be something that's a challenge to bite. That's the whole thing: not nipping until you draw a tiny bit of blood, but really biting deep. Sharing one another's pain, sharing each other's blood … bonding that way."

"And beyond that?" Gray asked, feeling drowsy again in Natsu's warm embrace.

"Beyond? The two dragons build a den together. They commit to one another for the rest of their lives."

"Marriage," Gray muttered sleepily.

"Uh, y-yeah." Natsu blushed slightly. Was Gray seriously already thinking about…?

"We're not ready for that. I'm not ready," Gray muttered, rubbing his fingers over Natsu's chest. "But … one step below that is the marked mate thing, right?"

"I … I guess, yeah. One step below that. It's like what we have now, just … a little more."

Gray hummed in sleepy contentment. "I'll think about it. Maybe … someday…"

"When you're ready," he whispered. "There's no rush. I'm sorry if I keep asking for it. It's sort of like an instinct, wanting that, but if you're not ready, that's fine. How we are right now is really good. I'll be happy if things stay just how they are."

"Yeah," Gray yawned.

"You're my mate, Gray. And I'm yours. Only yours." Natsu bent his neck to kiss Gray's forehead. "Let's sleep."

Gray closed his eyes. Marriage was definitely not something they were ready for. They were still figuring one another out. Just under that, though…engaged? No, something different than that. Something close, a deep bonding that would not easily be broken. Maybe normal humans had no word for that, at least not in any language Gray knew.

Was he ready for that? Were both of them ready?

No. The small argument earlier showed that they were still struggling, sorting things out. They were not even stable at the plateau they were on, let alone ready for a higher level of commitment and intimacy.

Still … someday.

He heard Natsu already snoring, his arms not letting go, hugging Gray closely. Gray shifted just a little, trying to get more comfortable. Sleeping on someone's chest might seem romantic, but in practicality it was painful. Still, Gray managed to find a comfortable nook in Natsu's body, a place where he fit with ease, as if made for this embrace. He rather liked the idea of that.

They were fire and ice, summer and winter, squinty eyes and droopy eyes, a man who wore a scarf in a heatwave and a man who stripped naked in a blizzard. On the outside, it was like they were created to always antagonize one another. Yet here in Natsu's arms, it felt like they were created to fit together like two pieces of a puzzle.

Gray drifted off to sleep thinking about how Natsu was the yang to his yin: hot, bright, fiery. Yang brought about destruction, while yin gave shape to things. Yang burned; yin froze.

Natsu was a force that balanced him, interconnected and interdependent of one another. They were not merely opposing forces, but complimentary. When combined, they were finally whole. They could not exist without one another, just as there could be no winter without summer and no heat without cold.

His yang. His flame. His beloved.

With those thoughts making him smile, Gray fell asleep in Natsu's arms.

Chapter Text

olive fingers

Gray woke up hot and sweaty. That only happened when Natsu shared his bed.

He rolled around and squinted as the sunlight slanted through his window. As his sleepy eyes cleared, he saw Natsu propped up in bed on an elbow, smiling down at him with the pink dawn sunlight making his hair shine brilliantly, like some cerise angel. Gray's heart fluttered when he saw Natsu looking protective like that. Forget guardian angels! He had his own guardian dragon.

"It's still weird waking up with you," Gray mumbled sleepily. "Odd to sleep with you too."

"You're one to talk! You're toes were ice cold all night long."

"You're so hot, having you wrapped around me makes me sweat."

"Yeah, you are rather sweaty," Natsu agreed. "Pretty gross. Smells."

"Shut up, bastard," he laughed sleepily.

Gray liked waking up like this. He never thought he would like sleeping with another person. The few times he had girls stay the night, he could hardly sleep at all. The girls always stole the covers, and a few had been snorers. Having someone flip back and forth beside him annoyed Gray, waking him every time they moved around. However, with Natsu, he slept wonderfully. The best part was waking up together.

He wondered how things ended up this way. It had started off as just a fling. He found out Natsu liked bondage, and Gray enjoyed the feeling of control he got when he immobilized a lover. Natsu was a masochist; Gray was a sadist. They fit together. Somewhere along the way, they realized they were two guys filled with mental fuckery that could have unhinged any normal person. They made mistakes, they cried, they comforted one another, and they used the bedroom to get over their issues. It was probably wrong, but it worked for them.

Was this desire even pure? What was it? Was it love? Was it more? The feelings in Gray's heart were so strong, they scared him. He could not remember feeling this possessive over a person, a feeling like if Natsu left him, his heart would literally tear in half. Even the girls he dated seriously, women he thought would make good wives, they were a social obligation more than an emotional craving.

"Should I get coffee going while you shower?" Natsu offered.

Gray chuckled and nicked the pinkhead on the chin. "Aren't you just a domestic little dragon!"

"I could ravage you in bed," Natsu purred, running his hand up Gray's chest, "but I figured last night satisfied you."

"Heh! For now." Gray rolled back over. "Mmm … gimme a few more minutes."

"Until the coffee brews."

"You make a good wife."

Natsu's eyes widened, but then he scoffed softly. "You're not gonna forgive me for that, are you?"

"Not until I see you in a white dress."

Natsu bit his lip slightly and cautiously asked, "Would you want that?"

"Crossdressing?"

"Marriage."

Gray looked over sharply. "Natsu, we're nowhere close to being ready for that."

He shrugged awkwardly. "Just wondering if it's a goal."

"A goal?" Gray thought about it, but he sighed in surrender to sleepiness. "I'm too damn tired to answer that properly."

Natsu leaned over and kissed Gray's forehead. "Snooze a little more, but not too long."

"Five more minutes, waifu."

"Shut up."

When Natsu rose out of bed, he felt the drain from last night. He had not felt this relaxed in days. He could not even remember back before Gray. How did he manage back then? He never masturbated, or at least not to completion. The only time he ever fully released his sexual tension was through dreams. Maybe that was all this was, one long and elaborate dream. If so, he hoped he never woke up…

…because his bed sheets would probably be a mess.

He laughed to himself at that thought as he walked into the kitchen. Happy was already awake, although looking grouchy. He never did do well if you woke him up in the middle of the night.

"Hey, Happy!"

"We're out of coffee creamer," the Exceed complained. Ah, no coffee. That could make even Happy grouchy.

"I guess we need a trip into town. I'll go wake up sleepy-butt." Natsu returned to the bedroom and shook Gray. "Hey, rise and shine."

"That was not even two minutes," Gray grumbled. He rolled over and pulled the blankets over his head. "I ain't getting up until I smell coffee."

"No creamer, so you get tea."

"I don't smell tea, either. Lemme sleep." He burrowed down more into the blankets.

Natsu thought he was adorable. Gray was never a morning person, and the petulant attitude was so like a little kid. "Come on, time for the ice princess to wake up."

"Dun wanna."

"Heh! Did I wear you out that much?" Natsu asked haughtily.

"Yes," he growled. Gray did not even bother to deny it.

Really, he was too cute! "Well, we need a trip into town. I'm out of food."

"You go on. Too tired."

"Come on! Get up." Natsu only got a bear-like growl in return. "Does the ice princess need a kiss to wake from the dragon's spell?" He leaned over and kissed the ear sticking out from the bundled blankets. Then Natsu stuck his tongue inside.

Gray flipped around in annoyance. "Dammit, stop that!" He hastily wiped his ear dry.

"I think the spell is breaking." Natsu sat on the bed and leaned over Gray. "Maybe the princess needs more kisses."

"Call me princess again and I'll—"

Natsu silenced those lips with his mouth, cutting off the sleepy growls and turning them into hums of surprise, then of enjoyment. Natsu sucked softly on Gray's lower lip and opened his eyes briefly to see Gray's face lost in pleasure. He pulled the blankets down, trailing his fingers over Gray's chest, and then ran his palms up, right over the nipples. Gray softly gasped Natsu's name at the touch.

Natsu pulled up, a string of saliva connecting their lips, and he gazed down at the dazed face jolted into wakefulness. "Get up. I want to eat breakfast with you."

"Y-Yeah," Gray said in a stupor.

Finally, Gray stumbled into the bathroom. Natsu returned to the kitchen and searched the cupboards, hoping to find something. He eventually gathered enough odds and ends to make a breakfast, and tea instead of coffee. He searched the pantry, looking at the food he had left: pickles, olives, something he was really unsure about but he thought they were a jar of canned peaches from seven years ago—he tossed that into the trash. They really were almost out of food. Natsu had not even been paying attention. He had been too distracted.

Then he picked up the olive jar again and looked at it. He opened it, stuck his hand in, put his finger inside one of the hollowed pits, and pulled an olive out. He wiggled it on his pinkie, and then popped it into his mouth, just like how he used to eat olives as a kid. He had two olive jars: large-size olives and smaller ones. He looked at the olives, and slowly he got a devious smile on his face.

"Heeey, Happy? How about you and Gray go into town for the shopping and I'll do some fishing?"

The Exceed's eyes lit up at that. "Can we have fish for dinner?"

"Yep. And um … do you think maybe you can stay in town and send Gray back here, just for a little while?"

Happy crossed his arms and glared with a knowing smile. "Natsu," he whispered slyly. "What are you planning? Nothing naughty I hope."

"No! N-No, I … um … Gray seems kind of depressed. I thought maybe we could have a lunch together, just the two of us. He's always tense being around me in town, so I thought maybe something here, something … romantic." He felt heat in his cheeks as he explained it to his best friend.

"Oooh," Happy practically sang, snickering as he witnessed an expression he rarely saw on Natsu. "And you want me out of the way, right?"

"It's not like that. I just…"

Happy held up a paw. "Natsu, it's fine. If I were to have fish with Carla, I wouldn't want you around to mess up the mood."

"Uh, right." Was that an insult?

"I can go to the guild. Maybe Carla is there."

"Y-Yeah, maybe. Thanks, really."

"What time should I be back?"

"Oh! You don't have to stay late or anything." He felt awkward, getting Happy away like this. "We'll have fish for dinner, promise."

"Aye, sir! Then I'll be back home before dark."

"Oh, and … um … don't tell Gray."

Happy chuckled at Natsu's bashfulness. "Do you want to surprise him?"

Natsu scratched the back of his head and looked at the olive jar again. "Yeah, kinda."

Happy's kitty smile fell slightly. "Natsu, does Gray really love you?"

Natsu thought about last night, the way Gray would dominate him, but how Gray also liked to encourage Natsu's path toward being more aggressive, how he took care of Natsu, stopped him from doing things that could make him sick, yet still, even when they both knew they should not do these things, Gray was just as desperate for Natsu's touches as the Dragon Slayer was for those powerful lips and chilly hands. Then there was their brief talk that night. Gray knew their limits as a couple. They were both a bit messed up still. Despite that, he seemed to want more in their relationship, just … wait a while, until the time was right.

"Yes," he whispered, smiling placidly. "He does." A shiver shook him, as if those cold hands were embracing him right now.

"I never hear him say it."

That was true, and if Happy noticed, then when they came out before the whole guild, other people would eventually notice that Gray never said 'I love you.' Natsu was fine with that limit, but he realized that others might not understand. Between him and Gray, they did not need words. Their actions showed their emotions.

"He's the sort who doesn't like to say mushy things," Natsu said as an excuse.

"Is he tsundere?"

Natsu spit out a laugh at Happy's blunt question. "Is … he … hahaha!" He laughed and gave a wild shrug. "Well, maybe a little bit."

"That's kinda cute. A tsundere uke."

The laughter stopped. "Wh-What?" Happy really was going too far now. Natsu dropped down to his friend and awkwardly whispered, "Gray's not an uke."

"He's not?"

"No!"

"Are you?"

Natsu stuttered as he tried to think of an answer. Technically, he was the receiver, but— "We don't do that whole seme/uke thing."

"Oh, I see. You two haven't done it yet."

"Happy!" His cheeks felt ready to burst into flames.

"Well, I guess since he's sick and can't have sex—"

"Happy!"

"It's good that you two haven't done it."

Natsu realized all he could do was keep quiet about that issue.

"But you called him your bride last night."

Natsu's face twisted up as he realized Happy would misunderstand that joke. "Yeah, and he got mad at me."

"A tsundere would. Which means he's the uke, right? When you two do it, you're rather aggressive so … be gentle with Gray. He's had lots of girlfriends, but I bet he's never … you know … that way."

"Happy, really!"

Happy tapped his paw against his chin. "I don't see either of you as being an uke, to be honest."

"That's because neither one of us is."

"Ooh, so you'll switch?"

"Happy!" Natsu looked aside as the embarrassment crept over his cheeks, neck, and ears. "I … I don't feel comfortable talking about things like that." He heard Happy tittering, and Natsu sullenly glared over. "What?"

"Oh, nothing," Happy chuckled.

"What?"

Happy gave a smug smirk. "You're blushing. Now you look like an uke." He saw Natsu get flustered. These two guys made an adorably awkward couple. Happy walked up and patted Natsu on the knee. "You really love him, don't you?"

Natsu struggled to hold back a blushing smile. He looked up as he heard the bathroom sink turn off. "Yeah."

"I think you'll make a strong and loving seme for Gray."

"Uh … thanks?"

"You'll also make a cute and doting uke."

"Happy, stop it!"

"Are you and Gray really okay?"

Natsu paused as he thought about what it meant to be okay. Okay meant normal, and they were anything but normal. Still, he felt their bonds to one another were really strong, and that was better than some couples. He left it by ambiguously answering, "We have our moments."

"I'm here if you need to talk," he offered.

"Yeah." Natsu gave Happy a hug. "Thanks, buddy. I'm glad you're by my side."

"That's what best friends are for."

They heard the bathroom door open, and Natsu stood up in a hurry. "He's coming. Remember, don't tell him about lunch."

Happy nodded secretively. "Aye, sir. I'll send him home with the groceries and stay in town until sunset."

"Thanks."

"Aye!"

Just then, Gray stumbled in, a bit wet from a morning shower and dragging his feet sleepily.

"Morning, Gray!"

"You are too goddamn cheerful for this hour," he grumbled.

Natsu chuckled. "Wow, someone's a grump." Now he could hardly help but think of Gray as a tsundere. It did not truly fit him, but imagining it was cute. "Breakfast is on the table."

"Coffee. Now."

"There's no creamer, so I made tea and—"

Gray collapsed onto the chair in front of the table. "Black."

Natsu glanced back around. "Huh?"

"Give it to me black," came a grumbling demand.

"Dang, someone's cranky." Still, Natsu went back to get some coffee started.

Happy followed and whispered to his friend. "Are you sure this is a good time for a romantic lunch?"

"Ehhhhh, he'll get better with coffee." At least, Natsu hoped so. Now that he had this idea, he really wanted to try it.

Sure enough, half an hour later, after Gray had woken up and had some coffee down him, he acted better, even helping with washing dishes. Natsu realized he still looked worn out, but he liked this pacified, drowsy look in Gray. To Natsu, it meant he had truly satisfied his lover.

He wondered what about last night had worn out Gray to this extent. Usually after a wild night, he woke up feeling fine. Was it that he had waited too long and lost his stamina? It had only been three days. Or was it the location? Maybe mentally, it was a lot more taxing on Gray being in the open: the thrill, the tension, the heightened awareness. Natsu wanted to test that theory, maybe another romp in the woods, but in daylight when they could see the wilderness around them and the fear of discovery was stronger.

Not today, though.

Gray and Happy went to town while Natsu grabbed his fishing pole and hiked out to the river. He used flames to circle the river, heating the water and chasing the fish to swim in a tighter circle. Happy never let him cheat like that, but Natsu wanted to hurry. He quickly caught three fish, enough for dinner, gutted them, returned home, and put the fish in an ice box. Then he got the olives and began to set up what he planned to do for Gray.


Gray was less than thrilled to be stuck carrying all of the grocery bags up the forest hill to Natsu's house after Happy claimed he saw "the perfect gift for Carla" and flew off. It was not that the groceries were heavy or anything—Gray had trained his body well over the years—but he did not want to do grocery shopping in the first place. Why did he have to go while Natsu sat around fishing?

Of course, if Natsu was still out fishing, they could maybe have some time alone by the river. That would be nice. No blue cat to interrupt them. However, he had forgotten to ask Happy where Natsu liked to fish. Gray did not even know a simple thing like this about Natsu. How long had they been dating? And he did not even know where Natsu's fishing spot was!

Gray arrived at the shabby hut feeling bad that he hardly knew Natsu. He walked straight to the kitchen and put away the food that needed to be chilled first. He heard nothing in the house, so he thought Natsu was still fishing. However, when he opened the freezer to put away ice cream, he saw three freshly-caught fish. After Gray finished putting away the food, he wandered around the house.

"Natsu?" he called out.

"In here," came a reply from the bedroom.

Gray walked in and froze. Natsu was lying naked on the bed, lust simmering in his eyes, and an arrogant smile on his lips.

"I've been waiting, Gray."

The ice wizard realized they had the house to themselves, no cat, no one around, all alone … and Natsu was taking advantage of this.

"What's going on?" Gray asked in amusement.

"I just wanted to give you lunch."

Gray realized there were things on Natsu's body. As his feet remembered how to walk, Gray stepped forward and saw squares of cheese and cubed ham on Natsu's torso. Then he saw plump black things wiggling on the tips of his feet.

"What's this? Olives on your toes?"

"The bread was moldy, but we had cheese, the last of the ham, and olives. Since I couldn't make you a sandwich, I made you a manwich."

"You kinky little bastard," chuckled Gray. Inventive—he'd give the Dragon Slayer that much credit!

"We need alternatives, right?" Natsu remembered on the Checklist of Fucking, one of the things Gray had listed was food on the body. It had seemed bizarre that first night, but the more Natsu thought about it, the more it sounded kinky and fun.

Gray sauntered forward. "So, you want me to eat you up, huh?"

Natsu only smiled at him, struggling to hold still so none of the food fell off.

He eyed the buffet set before him. "I wonder where I should start." Gray sat on the edge of the bed and caged Natsu in with his arms. Leering down at him, he mused, "Maybe with an appetizer."

He kissed Natsu hard, making the Dragon Slayer's whole body tense up. Gray could taste ham and cheese on that fiery tongue.

"Did you eat without me?"

"I … I just tasted the ham. I wanted to make sure it wasn't spoiled, and I dropped one of the cheeses so I ate that one."

"Naughty, naughty," Gray whispered, and he thrust his tongue in again. Natsu groaned in surprise. "Starting without me." He licked up the ham and cheese flavors. "Tastes good," he moaned.

As soon as Gray freed his mouth, Natsu panted out, "I left the main course for you."

Gray chuckled. "Thanks for the food."

He kissed down Natsu's neck to his collar. Just below, on his upper chest, were two cubes of cheese. Gray put his lips on Natsu's skin, sucking the cheese off slowly. The cheddar was heated from the Dragon Slayer's hot body, making it soft and almost ready to melt. He licked around the second piece of cheese, laving around the chest, before sucking that piece off and glancing up to Natsu. The idiot looked well-pleased with his special treat. Gray had to admit, this was a nice change, having Natsu think up kinky things to do. Leave it to him to use food in their play.

Two circle-cut slices of ham dotted his nipples. Gray moved down to them next. He nibbled them slowly, letting his lips rub against the flushed skin. He wondered how much preparation this all took, what Natsu must have been thinking the whole time he cut cheese and meat, planning how to present himself. This was not something slapped together in a rush. Natsu had put some thought into where to place the food, and even the olives on his toes.

As Gray finished one of the circle-cut meats, he nipped the erect nipple as well. Natsu moaned, and his body arched. One of the cubes of cheese slid off his torso and onto the bed sheet.

"Keep still. A table isn't supposed to move when the diner is eating." Gray picked up the cheese. "This one is dirty now." He thrust it against Natsu's mouth. "Eat."

Gazing up at those coldly amused eyes, Natsu obeyed and opened his mouth. Gray placed the cheese on his tongue and slowed withdrew his finger, dragging over Natsu's lip. Gray watched tenderly as Natsu chewed, his eyes never blinking, and then swallowed.

"Good dragon," he whispered, enthralled by this man. "You probably want some meat though, don't you?" He waited a moment, but when Natsu did not say anything, he ordered, "Answer me."

Natsu gulped before he could find his voice. "Y-Yes."

"Yes what?"

A devious gleam sparkled those sage green eyes. "Feed me meat," Natsu said in a low growl.

Gray flinched as that fierce order jolted straight down to his groin. God, he wanted to feed Natsu his meat. Not today, though. Not yet. However, as soon as he was well, Gray was going to punish Natsu hard for teasing him like this.

Gray took a cube of meat off of Natsu's belly button and brought it up. This time, Natsu's tongue slid out to wrap around the meat and bring it sensually into his mouth.

"Damn you," Gray whispered, straining to hold back.

"You have more to eat." Natsu's eyes pointed to the other circle of ham covering his left nipple.

Instead of nibbling, Gray dived down, ate the whole piece, and nipped Natsu hard, biting all around the areola. Natsu arched up, and all the pieces of meat and cheese remaining on his body slid off.

Gray suddenly lurched forward and slammed a kiss against Natsu. He rubbed his groin up against the Dragon Slayer's thigh, letting him feel that hardness through the tight jeans and easing some of Gray's own aching need for friction. An appreciative moan hummed out, but Gray let nothing else escape those burning lips. He grabbed up the last three pieces.

"Eat," he ordered, and he crammed them into Natsu's mouth.

While the Dragon Slayer chewed, Gray glanced down. Natsu had placed nothing to cover the best part, and Gray knew why. Although Gray could touch him and lightly kiss him down there, he could not chance getting Natsu into his deep throat. The doctor did not believe Gray had oral gonorrhea, but it was best to be safe.

Still, there were the toes.

Natsu saw Gray eying his feet. "Good idea, eh?" he chuckled. He wiggled his toes, making the olives dance. "Suck them off."

Gray scooted down to sit by Natsu's feet. They smelled of soap. At least he had the decency to wash up before doing this. Gray started with the big toe, wrapping his lips around the olive and sucking it up into his mouth.

Natsu arch up and whined loudly. "Oh God! I didn't think it would feel that good."

Gray smiled to himself as he chewed the olive. A foot fetish? Very interesting!

He went slower with the next toe, running his tongue up the arch of the foot before wrapping his mouth around the olive stuck on the toe. Natsu's fists clenched the sheets. It was fascinating to Gray, trying something new, something kinky, yet it did not involve getting restrained or hit. Simple toe sucking! It was something without all the emotional baggage of past trauma, something new, something just for them.

Just two toes, and Natsu had gone from semi-hard to fully erect, bobbing as his cock strained for attention. Natsu had thought this would be silly but maybe a little erotic. Gray could eat with him as the table, and then maybe sit in the bathtub together and wash the crumbs off his chest. It would be sensual but sweet. He never thought it would feel so … damn … good. Natsu had not at all meant for himself to get aroused from this. He thought they both would still be worn out from last night. Apparently, his stamina was a little too good.

Instead of getting the third olive, Gray sucked on the big toe again. Natsu's toenail lightly scrapped the roof of his mouth, so he angled his head slightly, sucking as deeply as that toe could go.

Natsu let out some gargled attempt at profanity, and his fingers grabbed his cock. He needed something, anything. He had never been able to masturbate, but he sure as hell needed his erection touched … right now.

"Gr- … -ray," he growled in a whimper.

"You're touching yourself," Gray pointed out. "I rarely see you do that." Instead of sucking the olive off, he nibbled on it, biting off pieces, slowly exposing the toe, while licking the skin.

Natsu gave another thrust into his own hand. "Gray!" he screamed.

"You're hot when you touch yourself."

"No! Re-…" Natsu tensed up until his veins strained. "Dammit, restrain me! Quickly!"

"I wanna watch you touch your—"

"Quick!" he roared angrily.

Gray backed off at the fierceness, looking stunned and confused.

"Please, don't ruin the mood, Gray. Just restrain me, suck my toes, and touch me. Don't make me think about anything bad."

Bad? Was masturbating that much of an issue as well? Why? Was this issue tied into what happened in the past? But how? Natsu had never explained why jerking himself off was a challenge. He could casually touch, but never vigorously. Gray had so many questions, but this was not the right time to ask.

"Sorry. You're just really sexy." Gray smiled, hoping to relax the tenseness in those taut muscles. He slowly came forward, crawling over Natsu's naked body. "I can't wait until I'm well. I wanna eat up something other than your toes."

"I want that too," Natsu groaned. "Heh! This lunch went so well, maybe next time, when you're better, I should put whip cream on my cock and serve you dessert."

"Mmm," Gray moaned, imagining it. "With chocolate sauce and maybe some ice cream melting over your body. Damn, I would love to make a sundae out of you."

He kissed Natsu hard and thrust his tongue in. His body pressed down against Natsu again. Gray had lost his shirt at some point, but his pants were still on. Natsu felt roughness from Gray's jeans, and the coldness of his metal belt buckle scraped against his turgid erection. Natsu loved to feel how aroused he could make Gray. He knew Gray was depressed because of this whole sickness issue. He wanted to cheer him up. He wanted to find things they could do together, fun things, sexy things, that would take his mind off of how much they could not do and instead expose the ice wizard—who was so used to casual sex—into a world of romance and playful sensuality.

When Gray leaned up, his lips dripped in saliva and his cheeks were flushed with arousal; however, Natsu could see in the tenseness of Gray's brow, he was thinking about their limitations again. He wanted more, and he could not have it.

"You're forgetting my feet," Natsu pointed out, hoping to put focus back on his original plan. "Restrain me and get back to sucking my toes, Gray."

"Yeah, yeah," he chuckled. So bossy!

He grabbed Natsu's wrists and pinned them to the headboard. The roughness made Natsu's back arch. He loved when Gray slammed his hands above his head like this. Gray smiled down as he frosted Natsu's hands to the headboard. That was a much better face, no anger, no fear, just carnal desire.

Gray went back to the end of the bed and licked Natsu's foot again, up the arch and across the callused pads. His tongue glided between the webbing of the toes. Then he moved to the top of the foot, kissing from ankle to toenails. He had never really looked at a person's foot—they simply never interested him before—but Natsu's feet were fascinating. He usually wore sandals, so there was a tan line across the top of his foot. His toes were surprisingly small, which let the olives fit.

"I've never experienced someone with a foot fetish," Gray mentioned. "I honestly have no clue what to do."

"Like I know," Natsu panted out of his tensed throat as the moist tongue tickled and aroused him all at the same time. "I never really had anyone touch my feet before, let alone this."

"Tell me what you want. You fed me such a nice lunch, the least I can do is give you a treat in return."

"Heh! What I really want is for you to screw me up the ass, but you can't do that yet."

Gray pouted, knowing he was right, only to get a devious smile. "Well, just not my cock."

Natsu blinked in confusion. "Huh?"

"You wanna feel it down here?" He rubbed his finger around Natsu's anus. The Dragon Slayer jolted up in shock. "Is this where you want it?"

"Mmm-hmm!" he moaned wantonly.

"I'm gonna try something. You're fine when I'm wearing a condom, so … why not use one on my fingers?"

"F-Fingers? They sell finger condoms?"

"No, dumb ass!"

"If you mean a glove, I really can't—"

"No." He reached into his back pocket. "I stopped off at the sex shop and bought a few of these in case we sneak out into the woods again." He pulled out a little square package and ripped it open with his teeth. "My fingers should be fine, but I'm going to be safe with you. Totally safe. I'm not taking chances when I'm this close to finishing treatment."

He rolled the condom over his finger, starting with just one. Then Gray pushed Natsu's legs up and exposed his puckered star.

"I miss playing here," he whispered. Gray leaned over and kissed both butt cheeks.

"H-Hey!"

"I won't do more than that," he assured. However, Gray kept kissing up Natsu's thigh, laying kisses all along his powerful muscles. "Just this much," he muttered, kissing the hot skin up to Natsu's knee. "Bend your legs up to your chest," he ordered.

Natsu curled both knees up, rolling almost into a ball.

"Yes, like this," Gray whispered. Natsu blushed at such an exposed position, but Gray smiled down at him. "You still have olives on your toes."

He grabbed Natsu's ankle and lifted it up to his mouth. He sniffed the soapy residue and ran his nose up the arch of the foot. Natsu shuddered at the cold nose and icy breath on his sensitive feet. Then Gray kissed up to the two toes that still had olives. He glided his tongue up the foot until scooping the olive off and used just his tongue to pop it into his mouth.

"Tasty," he purred. "Last one."

This time, Gray put all five toes into his mouth, stretching his lips to fit them all. Natsu cried out and arched up off the mattress. Right at that moment, Gray rammed his finger into Natsu's ass, entering hard and raw. The cry raised almost a full octave.

"I like being inside you," Gray moaned, laving Natsu's foot with his tongue, making lewd faces as he licked from heel to toe. "I love how fucking hot you are!"

He pulled out and pressed in slower. This time, he made sure the condom entered properly, pressing it in. He pulled completely out and switched to his middle finger, again going slow and using this longest finger to make sure the condom was snugly inside. Then, to help his fingers slide inside that latex barrier, he thrust two fingers into Natsu's mouth.

"Suck them," he ordered sternly.

Natsu had a tear in his eye as he obediently sucked and ran his tongue over Gray's knuckles. Suddenly, he bit down. Gray tried to pull back with a cry of pain, but Natsu held the fingers tightly between his teeth. Then he mouthfucked those fingers, sucking voraciously.

"Shit, Natsu," Gray groaned. He pressed his jeans up against the Dragon Slayer's thigh to give his own cock some friction. Gray yanked his wet fingers away, but Natsu had a satisfied grin on his wet, swollen lips.

"You have a finger fetish; I have a foot fetish. We complement one another nicely."

Gray chuckled and kissed Natsu's heel. "Indeed we do! Now…" Gray brought his moistened fingers back down and nudged one inside. Natsu groaned as he relaxed his muscles. "You're so good at taking it in now," he praised.

"Because I love to feel you inside me," Natsu huffed, his cheeks flushed. "Nnngh … oh God…"

"You like this, don't you?" Gray whispered heatedly, gazing at Natsu's struggles with amusement. "I can't fuck you right now, but you like my finger up your ass."

"Touch me," Natsu begged in a high whine.

"Not yet."

"Gray, please!"

"I like watching you. I like seeing you squirm like this. You're so hard even without me touching you."

Natsu yanked on the restraints, but being chained up put a delightful stop to him. He felt like hitting Gray for teasing him so cruelly, and he loved that he did not have to worry about hurting his lover. "Touch me!" he bellowed.

"Soon," Gray promised. He leaned over and sucked Natsu's nipple. The Dragon Slayer gasped and arched up, eyes wide and mouth open as he panted fast. "You like that," he stated.

"Do-…" The word cut off as Gray hit his prostate again.

"Don't, or do?" Gray asked sternly.

Natsu flushed and turned his head aside to hide half of it into the pillow. "Gray, please," he whimpered. "Don't make me come without touching me."

"Why not?"

Natsu snarled, "Because I like you touching me!" He jolted, startled by his own fierceness. "I … I like … how you feel … your hands on me. Please, Gray. Pleeeease," he moaned deeply.

Gray felt a wet spot in his boxers from that begging moan alone. "Dear God, you're sexy," he whispered in awe. How could he possibly deny such a sensual request? Gray reached down and gently caressed the stiff mast. "Like this?"

"Y- … oh God … yeah. S-Stroke it … like that. Ooooh!" he shuddered.

Gray felt the searing heat, the stiffness, and a shudder along the whole length. Natsu was so hard, really ready to go.

"Faster," Natsu moaned. Gray obliged, giving swifter strokes along the full length. "Ahrgh! Yeah!"

"I don't want you to come too soon."

"I … I know but … God, Gray, I need it!"

"Not yet," he teased. "I should probably go slower." His wrist almost came to a stop.

"Ahh! Nooo!" Natsu whimpered. He began to thrust his own hips up into Gray's hand.

Gray chuckled sadistically at such delicious desperation.

"Please! I want you, Gray."

"I know. Believe me, I want you too. I … I need you."

He needed him. He wanted him. He … loved him. Gray flinched as his mind thought that. He loved Natsu, so much. He never wanted this to end. He wanted Natsu to be with him forever. He wanted … more. He wasn't sure what yet, but … more!

"I'm so addicted to you," he muttered, kissing Natsu's foot. "So helplessly addicted!"

He picked up the other foot, still with olives on the toes.

"Need you."

He ate off the pinkie toe's olive, yanking the black oval off with gnashing teeth, chewing viciously, and swallowing it down.

"Want you!"

He ate the next one with the same vigor.

"Adore you."

This time, he went slower. He licked up from the heel to the toe and kissed the two bare toes, before moving over to the middle toe with its olive. He licked around it, around all three adorned toes, circling them with his tongue. Then finally, slowly, he used just his lips to pull the olive off and eat it.

"Desire you!"

For Natsu's long index toe, Gray thrust all four smaller toes into his mouth, lapping and sucking all of them. Natsu clenched the headboard and yanked on the icy restraints with a growl of lust. At the same time, Gray slid a second finger inside. As he sucked those toes, running his tongue between each, his fingers felt around inside until there was a small change in the smooth walls.

Natsu cried out, eyes wide open, as that spot deep inside was massaged. Once Gray found it, he refused to touch anywhere else. His fingers curled and rubbed right against the prostate, massaging it, getting wanton, carnal moans out of the Dragon Slayer.

"Lo- … Luh- … -ov-…"

"Gray, don't force it."

"… you! Dammit."

Natsu looked bittersweetly at him. "I know, Gray. I love you too."

Gray snapped angrily, "I wanna say it!"

"Don't! Show it. No words, Gray," Natsu cried out, writhing on the bed, unable to hold still. "No words. Show me. Oh God, please, show me!"

Gray felt a shiver running all through his nerves. How was it that Natsu could fight those demons of the past and make it to this point, yet Gray felt like he had made no progress at all?

No … he did make progress.

He had fallen in love.

Not familial love. Not the love between teammates. Not even the childish puppy love he felt for his elementary school teacher. Romantic love! He had fallen romantically in love with this crazy, hotheaded, pyromaniac flame-brain. Gray might have had a few serious relationships in the past—and many flippant ones—but he had never felt like this before. Never in his life had he so desperately wanted to say those three words to a lover.

Never since Deliora destroyed all he loved had Gray wanted to say 'I love you' to another person.

That alone was a huge step. And it was all thanks to Natsu.

To make up for his inability to say it, Gray rammed a third finger in. "I feel it, Natsu. Know that much. I'm scared you'll die like everyone else if I say it, but I feel it. I definitely feel it. It scares the shit out of me, but I still feel … that way! I'll show you my feelings," he declared.

He suddenly rammed the big toe, olive and all, into his mouth. Gray sucked Natsu's toe more vigorously than he had ever sucked someone's cock. At the same time, he thrust his fingers inside and stroked Natsu's erection. It was a lot of work to coordinate all three activities at once, but the result was worth it. Pre-cum was dripping copiously down Natsu's shaft, moistening Gray's fingers and letting them slick over the burning skin easier.

Natsu was utterly lost. He heard his voice crying out nonstop, wild and without restraint. He felt himself yank on the icy bonds as a darker instinct wanted to fight this and kill anyone who touched him like this. Another part of him wanted to give in and indulge. In the end, that part won over.

"Gray!" Natsu cried out, his face tensing. "Close … I'm so close."

Gray pulled off the foot, taking the last olive with him. "You know what?" he said craftily. "This is the first time we've made love in this bed."

"Wh-What?" he asked breathlessly, barely able to hear over the rushing blood in his ears.

"It's our first time…" He kissed Natsu's ankle. "…me having you like this…" He nibbled along the edge of the foot. "…here in your own bed." He nipped the Achilles tendon and kissed along the ankle.

Natsu laughed wearily. "Yeah, it is."

"You're gonna come in your own bed, Natsu, and it won't be some wet dream. It'll be me making you come. My hand." He thrust his fingers in deeper. "My mouth." He sucked the toes more, and Natsu arched up.

Gray did not even need to wait until Natsu demanded it. His mouth moved to the top of the ankle, right where it was tender, and he bit Natsu there. A bruise to the ankle would hurt every time the Dragon Slayer walked, but it was less obvious than a bruise to the neck.

"I need you," Gray moaned. "Need to hear you."

Natsu moaned louder to give him what he wanted.

"Need to taste you." He bent over and licked the thick, clear fluid dripping from the cock. Natsu gasped at the amazing feeling of wet heat. "Yes, like that," Gray moaned, and he rubbed himself up against Natsu's thigh again. "Damn, I'm gonna need to change boxers." Suddenly, he looked down, saw that pink head sticking up, and craved it so much, he could not hold back. "I want to lick it up."

Natsu cracked open his eyes in confusion. "What?"

"I wanna lick you up," Gray said, looking hard at the flared end of that cock. "I shouldn't, but…" His eyes shot over to Natsu's gaze. "Do you trust me?"

"I … yeah, of course."

"I need you. Shit, I'm gonna hate myself for this, but I need you too much." His fingers pulled out, and he stomped over to Natsu's dresser.

"Gray!" Natsu cried out, stunned that he stopped and took off so suddenly. "Hey, what's wrong?"

Gray reached into his back pocket as he walked and pulled out another square package. He ripped it open, pulled out the condom, and took a letter opener from the dresser. He partly unrolled the condom and sliced the end off with the small knife.

"What the hell are you doing?" asked Natsu.

"You hate condoms, but you only hate coming inside one, right?"

"Huh?"

Gray returned to the bed. "Trust me, please." He began to roll the condom over Natsu's length.

Natsu yanked on the icy restraints. "Gray!" he shrieked.

"It's cut open, see. It's covering all but the tip. I want you to come in my mouth. My lips will be here, on the rubber. I won't let my tongue touch the tip, just the latex part, and I won't drool. I need to taste you. I'll rub you, but my lips will rest here, just under the glans, and you'll come in my mouth. Goddammit, this is so dangerous. I shouldn't put you at risk like this."

"It's fine, Gray."

"It's not!" he shouted, yet his eyes tightened. "But it's what I need."

Despite knowing he was pushing the boundaries of what was safe, Gray kissed up and down the shaft. Then he put just his lips around the tip of the penis, resting them on the latex condom, and looked up to Natsu. Those narrow eyes gawked down at him. Gray pulled back up.

"Will that work?"

"I … y-yeah, but I don't feel your lips very well that way."

"Mentally, though. Will it work for you?"

"Yeah, should. It's not coming into a condom. It's just like a raincoat around my cock."

"Heh, yeah, something like that. I'm going to swallow it down. Will that be all right?"

Natsu nodded frantically. "Swallow it! Yes. If you swallow, it's fine."

"Okay." Gray carefully returned his fingers into Natsu's ass. "God, I wish I could have you slam into my throat, but—"

"No," Natsu interrupted. "Do what you can. Please, Gray." His eyes heated up. "I want you to swallow me. I wanna feed you dessert."

Gray felt smug that Natsu wanted this just as much as him. "All right. Just my lips." He wrapped his mouth around, being extra cautious. He held the rest of the cock with his hand and stroked slowly down. Then, squeezing the base slightly, he sucked hard on the head.

"Ah … ahhhhhhn," Natsu cried out, his voice cracking from intense pleasure of the suction.

He was burning from his balls to his flared and flushed cockhead. He could feel just how close he was to losing control, like a leash pulled taut, an animal straining to break free, and slowly that leash was tearing apart, ready to snap at any minute and free the wild beast inside.

Gray pulled off before he could drool and licked the saliva from his lips. "Tell me when you're ready. I want to make sure I get all of it."

"Ready!" Natsu cried, shuddering. "Gonna … come … G-Gray! Now! Oh God, now!"

Gray dived down, just holding the head with his lips, while his fingers stroked and his other hand thrust hard.

For Natsu, all the senses—that mouth on his cock, the fingers stroking his ass, and the fast jerking of his arousal—all became one large wave of eroticism. It crashed over him, drowning him. His mind shut down as it felt as if everything within him—his magic, his fire, his soul, his life—was pouring out, gushing into Gray's mouth. All he wanted was to sink into this feeling, sink into Gray, fall into his wintry embrace, and stay there forever.

Gray felt spurts over his tongue and sliding down his throat. It was salty with a bitter tang, but it was Natsu. It was his release, his essence, a dessert sweeter than any candy. He heard Natsu, first crying out, then moaning lowly, and finally sighing, breathing steadier. Gray sucked just a little harder to get all of it up. Then he pulled back and swallowed.

"I missed your taste," he sighed in shivering pleasure. "Oh damn, I shouldn't have done that but … I needed to taste you again. I need you … so much."

Natsu made no reply, lost in euphoria. Gray smiled down at the exhausted satisfaction on the Dragon Slayer's face. It was worth wasting a condom to see that sort of expression. The flushed cheeks, the watery eyes, the parted mouth panting for air, and a blush that spread down his chest: all of it was so perfect, so amazing. Gray could not even find words. He just gazed at his lover and cherished this moment.

He discovered that he was also breathing hard. His lips ached from sucking those toes and cock. He slowly pulled his fingers out, making sure the condom came with them, and tossed the soiled rubber to the side. Natsu hummed as those fingers left him feeling empty. He felt so much more complete with Gray filling him, even if just his fingers. Then Gray rolled the cut condom off. He leaned over and placed a gentle kiss to the tip of the limp head. He realized his hand had pre-cum all over it. He began to reach under the bed for a tissue.

"No," Natsu panted out sharply. "Here. Bring them here. Let me lick them. Wanna lick." His brain could not string the words together correctly, but he knew what he wanted.

"But it's your own—"

"That's fine!" he snapped. "I wanna suck your fingers clean."

Gray collapsed onto the mattress and released the ice restraints. Natsu took Gray's wrist with both hands, brought the messy palm up to his face, and began to lick the fingers tenderly, like a cat grooming itself. Gray stroked Natsu's hair with his free hand and watched his lover clean him.

Natsu began to take two fingers into his mouth, but he gazed up with a silent question before sliding down. Gray was aroused, but he decided to ignore it for now, just wanting to indulge in this wild, fiery lover and his moment of ultimate bliss. He did not want all the annoyance and depression that came with realizing how easily he could get Natsu sick just by coming. He shook his head, and Natsu released the fingers, giving one last lick from palm to fingertips, before turning Gray's hand over to kiss the knuckles.

They did not even need to ask anymore. Once Natsu was done, Gray wrapped the Dragon Slayer into his arms and cuddled him.

"Gray," Natsu whispered in a weary sigh. He smiled lightly. "Thank you."

The ice wizard chuckled softly and squeezed Natsu's shoulders. "You're very welcome." He leaned up into Natsu's ear and whispered a cold breath, "Thanks for the meal."

Natsu wanted to laugh, but he was far too exhausted for more than a smile and jolt of his chest. "I'm glad you liked it."

"I definitely did. We've gotta do this again."

"I did offer to make myself into a sundae."

"God, I want that!" Gray could picture it, and the idea was so kinky, he absolutely had to try it sometime. "A few more days, Natsu," he whispered. "Just a few more days."

"I can't wait."

"Heh. Yeah." Gray began to sit up, but he felt the stiffness in his pants. He really had to deal with this. "I'm gonna go home and jerk off."

"You could do it here."

"I don't want to risk infecting anything around here."

"Oh." Natsu rose up and sat on the edge of the bed. "Can I watch?"

Gray scoffed lightly. "Can you behave?"

"Probably not."

He laughed at that blithe honesty. "Fine. Come on."

Chapter Text

Lucy and Loke were locked arm in arm. They had a sweet lunch together and were heading over to the park where they had heard about a free summer concert.

Loke was proud to have such a gorgeous woman by his side. Sure, with his looks he could have any woman in Magnolia—and once upon a time, he had almost every single woman of legal age calling him "my boyfriend" at some time or another. None of them compared to his master, though. She was lovely, smart, and strong—oh so strong! Only he and his fellow Celestial Spirits could fully appreciate her strength.

For Lucy, she secretly liked the jealous looks she got, and sometimes she caught herself smirking back at some gawking woman, thinking to herself 'Go ahead and drool. He's mine!' She knew of Loke's promiscuous past, but she also knew that one of the traits of the Lion was loyalty.

Sure, she got mad at him when he asked if she wanted to try a threesome. Lucy realized, Loke was probably accustomed to ladies who did not mind sharing him, which would explain why he looked confused when she had slapped him and took off in tears.

Mira, ever the love expert, assured her that almost every guy has a fantasy of having two partners at once. So Lucy eventually forgave Loke, and with Mira urging her on, shot back to him that she would only do a threesome if it was two guys. That stunned Loke speechless, until finally he muttered, 'I'll think about it.' Hah! Right back at him! So they made up—in a really good way—and now they were on such a wonderful date.

"Oh! It's Gray," Loke said, glancing down an avenue.

Lucy looked in that direction and saw the raven-haired ice wizard. He stood taller than most of the town residents. As the crowd parted, she saw Natsu walking beside him.

"Gray and Natsu, together?" asked Lucy. "I wonder if they're heading off to fight again."

Loke took a deep inhale. His nose might not be on the same level as a Dragon Slayer, but it was still keener than a human's. What he smelled made his eyebrows rise. He chuckled and pulled Lucy onward.

"Eh?" she asked, following but looking back to her two teammates. "We should at least say hello."

Loke did not stop walking. "You'll see them later. Let's leave them alone."

"Why? It's not like they're on a date," she chuckled.

Loke decided not to say anything. He owed Gray at least that much.


Somehow, Gray and Natsu managed to walk all the way back to Gray's house without yanking one another into an alley or groping each other in public. When Gray walked in, he paused. He came here just to jerk off real fast, but with Natsu here, back in his house, with that chest of kinky items just waiting to be opened…

He shook his head. He shouldn't! Damn, he wanted to, but he had to behave.

"Gray?"

He jolted at that low, sexy voice. Hot hands slithered around from behind and slid up his torso. They dipped under Gray's shirt and traced up his abdomen. Natsu's steamy breath exhaled into his ear.

"I wanna watch you," he hissed.

A chill shivered down Gray, and although the long walk had made him soft again, he felt all that pressure surge right back down with twice the intensity.

Again, hot air sizzled his ear. "I wanna see you touch yourself. I want to watch you lose control."

"Dammit, Natsu," he snapped breathlessly. Gray reached down and rubbed himself through his jeans as Natsu let his burning fingers flick the icy nipples. Gray felt warm lips nibbling down his neck, as far as his shirt would allow. Gray began to reach to the buttons of his shirt.

"Stay dressed," Natsu ordered, his mouth still against Gray's skin. "I want to touch you like this."

"Isn't naked better?" Gray laughed tensely as his instinct to strip intensified. He wanted these clothes gone!

"Normally, yeah, but then I can't touch you … here."

One of Natsu's hands slid down and felt the stiff contour tenting in Gray's pants. Gray tensed up, but he felt the slight pressure of teeth on the nape of his neck.

"I won't let you escape," the Dragon Slayer threatened.

Gray shuddered as he heard that aggressive side to Natsu rearing up again.

"I need to feel you," Natsu muttered into Gray's skin. His fingers stroked through the jeans, enticing Gray to get harder. He felt that hidden member lengthening, and he tugged the material a little to give it room. Then his other hand went up again and twisted Gray's nipple.

"Natsu!" Gray cried out. He pressed back against the hot body behind him.

"Can I stroke you off in your clothes?" Natsu asked, his voice a little sharp and demanding with need.

Oh God, Gray wanted that! "I … I don't think that'd be safe either. It'll seep through."

"Dammit," Natsu grumbled, sulking slightly. "What if you wear a condom and I give you a blow job, like what you just did for me?"

Holy fuck! "You are tempting me way the hell too much. No! I wouldn't be able to enjoy it. I'd be too scared for you the whole time."

"I'd be good."

"You're too reckless." Gray pulled away, despite his body protesting at leaving those searing touches. "Just sit and watch like a good dragon. Or do I have to put your collar on and tie you to a chair?"

Natsu's eyes went massive at that. "Can you?"

"Oh hell, that'd make me wanna fuck you," Gray muttered, shaking his head.

"But … just the collar then?"

Gray raised an eyebrow. "Just the collar?"

"I haven't worn it in a long time. I … um … I kinda miss it."

Gray walked forward and stroked Natsu's neck under the white scarf. "Do you really like it that much?"

"It … it makes me feel … um … I can't put it into words. Wanted. Belonged." He gazed up with a light smile. "Yours."

"My bitch."

Natsu glared. "Your dragon."

Gray rested his lips against Natsu's forehead. "My beloved."

Natsu felt like his cheeks might catch on fire without any magic at all.

Gray opened the chest of kinky supplies. The white leather collar with pink satin lining sat right on top, like precious crown jewels resting atop a treasure chest. When he brought it back to Natsu, the Dragon Slayer had already removed his scarf and hung it up with care. Gray wrapped the collar around, buckled it in, and used a tiny key to lock the miniature padlock. He set the key on the nightstand and gazed at his collared dragon.

"It suits you."

Natsu touched the collar lovingly. It was something Gray had made just for him. Everything else Gray used was store-bought, kinky supplies anyone could purchase. This, however, was one-of-a-kind, and Gray had picked out the color and design specifically with Natsu in mind. He smiled to himself as he imagined that it was like an engagement ring, something to wear that was a physical representation of their bond to one another. Except, even most engagement rings were made in bulk for anyone to wear. This collar was completely unique, and it was something he would only wear in front of Gray. That made it even more precious.

Gray's finger traced where he had Natsu's name embroidered on the collar. Then he looked on the other side and what was written there. He pouted a little. "I think I need to change your collar."

"Wh-What?" Natsu cried out. No! His unique collar!

"It says bitch on the side here." Gray gazed down into those squinty green eyes. "I think it should say beloved."

Natsu gasped, and he felt tears coming into his eyes. "Gray…"

"Yes, a nice white collar, just like this, but it'll say Beloved across it. Beloved Natsu. Maybe in rhinestones. So when you put it on, you're not my bitch. You're my beloved Natsu."

"Gray!" His arms grasped around and clung on. "I love you," he declared boldly, as if saying it for the first time.

Gray put his hand on Natsu's head, silently letting him know he felt the same way.

Then, Natsu chuckled mischievously. "Hehe! Gotcha!"

Natsu grabbed Gray up, right off his feet, and slammed him against the bed in a powerful judo throw. Gray cried out in surprise at the attack. Playfully, Natsu leaped on top, straddling Gray's body with a victorious grin.

"You can collar me, but you can't control me."

He dived down and kissed Gray so roughly, Gray worried he might split his lip. Natsu's tongue dashed in, devouring the taste of mint and a lingering flavor of olives.

"Natsu … mmmh … not too deep into my mouth, remember?"

Natsu ignored him and rolled his hips against Gray. He liked the stiffness he felt down there and savored the groan that shuddered out of the ice wizard's throat.

"Na- … mmmgh … stop … ghmmm…! Y-Yellow."

Natsu sat up in surprise at hearing the safeword. Never had Gray said those words. "Yellow? From just kissing?"

"You weren't stopping." Gray shoved him off and sat up, wiping the saliva that had dripping onto his chin. "You can't get into my deep throat, remember?"

"I was just kissing."

Gray glared slightly. "I could feel your tongue on my frigging tonsils. Sit. Bed. Now!"

Natsu gave a childish pout and sullenly plopped down with his bottom lip sticking out. Gray stood slowly, his groin aching already. He was losing control to the Dragon Slayer, and he desperately needed to regain it.

"You need to behave. Do you understand?" he asked in his best Dominant voice.

Natsu rolled his eyes. "Yeah, yeah."

Gray suddenly grabbed the ring on the front of the collar and yanked Natsu's head up. He spoke slower this time. "Do you understand … bitch?"

Natsu flinched under those hard, domineering eyes and whispered, "Y-Yeah. Sorry."

"Sorry … what?"

Natsu blinked, completely confused.

"You are my dragon; I am your owner. What is a pet owner called?"

"Oh. Kainushi."

"So how should you apologize to me?"

"Sorry … kainushi?" he guessed.

Gray released the collar. "Good dragon. Now, sit there, and no touching." Gray threw off his shirt. Then with erotic slowness, he stripped out of his jeans. "Just watch. Enjoy the show."

Gray still had his boxers on, and he stroked himself through them, undulating his hips as if dancing to music. Natsu sat still, staring hard enough to burn those clothes off with his gaze. Gray saw him lick a bit of drool collecting on his lip. Yes, he liked when Natsu was aggressive, but he loved when he turned the Dragon Slayer into a speechless mess.

"I wanna…" Natsu began to reach forward.

Gray yanked his belt off of his jeans and slapped Natsu's hand away with it. "I said you can't touch."

Gray grabbed both of Natsu's hands, held his wrists together, and threaded the belt through its own buckle to bind them. The buckle and strap were not tight restraints, but he liked seeing Natsu tied up. Gray held onto the loose end of the belt. Collared, hands tied in front of him, the belt like a leash … yes, this was how Gray loved to see Natsu. It made him feel in control, and especially when it was the Dragon Slayer, someone he knew was insanely powerful, having control over such a person was exhilarating.

"I like you like this," Gray said with a glinting smile.

"But I wanna touch you. I need to."

"You can't, not while I'm sick. The infection is on the skin itself, so you can't touch around there."

"But…" As Gray continued to remove his boxers, Natsu felt desperate to touch him. "Gray," he whined. This was torture. He shouldn't have come. He knew it would be too tempting.

"I won't let you get sick. Now shut up and behave, or I'll send you home and jack off in the shower alone, like I had planned to do."

"But … what if…? Can you…?" Natsu's face tensed up in debate, but finally he decided, "P-Put a glove on me."

Gray froze in shock, remembering how Natsu had almost freaked out at just the mention of wearing a glove.

"I can touch you then, right?"

"But Natsu…" he began to protest, worried Natsu was pushing his limits too far.

"Please. I wanna get over it, and … and I wanna touch you so badly," he said in anguish. "I know I can't do things, I've been trying to be good, but … I need it. I need to feel you in my hand. Touching through your clothes just isn't enough!" His face firmed up, and he gazed Gray straight in the eye. "Put a glove on me, so I can really touch you."

Once again, Gray felt in awe that Natsu was working so hard to overcome his past traumas. Just how scary must this be? Natsu's exposure to rubber gloves came from a man who molested and tortured him. Yet he was willing to face that fear, and all because of his desire.

Gray felt unworthy of love this intense.

"Please, Gray," Natsu requested softly. He had the look of resolve he sometimes got when facing an enemy. Natsu wanted to battle this fear of the past, and Gray had to be there to help him fight.

"O-Okay." Gray realized how important his job was now. It was more than just letting Natsu give him a handjob. He had to support Natsu through this.

He hurried to the bathroom where he kept a packet full of disposable latex gloves, mostly used for housecleaning or tending wounds, but this time it was a wound to the soul that had to be healed. He decided just one glove would be enough; two might be too much for Natsu to handle. He hurried back to the bedroom, knelt on the floor beside the bed, and gazed up at Natsu, feeling the urgency to help his lover overcome a deeply-seated phobia.

Natsu had pulled the belt off of his wrists, and he was staring down at his hands with tenseness in his brow. Gray wondered what was running through his head. Memories of the past? Secret horrors he was not ready to talk about?

Natsu looked at the glove. Bad memories were associated with gloves like that. He began to reach forward to take the glove out of Gray's hand, but he could not bring himself to touch it. He gulped down a shiver and asked quietly, "Can you put it on me?"

Gray tried to look reassuring as he rolled part of the glove up to make sliding it onto Natsu's fingers easier. "Right hand. Spread your fingers."

Natsu obediently held his hand up, and Gray put the fingers inside the glove. Natsu tensed up and looked away with a groan as memories surged: being tied up and watching with horror as that vile man snapped a glove on, getting ready for another session.

"Are you okay?" Gray asked, holding still.

"Yeah," Natsu gasped. He hardly realized he had been holding his breath. He whispered to himself, "It's me and not him. It's me … not him."

"Natsu?"

"It's okay!" he shouted frantically. When he looked down at his hand, the glove was completely on. He hardly felt Gray slide it down his hand and to his wrist. Natsu wiggled his fingers. Already, they felt sweaty from the latex holding in his natural heat, but he realized there was no fear associated with it anymore. "Yeah," he laughed. "It's okay. I think I'm okay with this. It's me, and it's you, and I wouldn't do that to you. I would never…"

"I know you wouldn't," Gray said, rubbing Natsu's knee and smiling with confidence.

Natsu grinned. "So, it's okay."

So easily, Natsu faced a fear and defeated it. Gray felt both proud and a little jealous that Natsu was so strong, while he still battled the same fear over and over again.

Natsu stretched out to him with both hands. "Come here, Gray. I've been needing to touch you for two goddamn weeks." His eyes narrowed, and he growled lustfully, "Get up here!"

Gray chuckled at that greedy need, and he sat on the edge of the bed.

"Lie down. I want you on the bed."

"All right," Gray said in amusement, obeying orders this time.

Natsu looked across Gray's body, and then glared over to his hand. It's me, not him. It's me, not him. It was a mantra to keep himself from slipping into bad flashbacks. Still, his own fears bubbled up.

"I … I'm going to touch you now," he warned.

Idiot! He's not the one who's scared.

Still, Natsu felt hesitant. It was hard not to imagine that this was like he was the attacker. Still, Gray wanted this. He loved Gray, and he wanted to touch him. This was the only way. He would have touched him just as eagerly without the gloves, and Gray would love it. So it was okay to touch with gloves. It wasn't like that time at all.

Despite telling himself that, Natsu was timid at touching Gray, fearing it might feel unnatural, or disgusting, or painful. He cautiously wrapped his fingers around the cock, scared to squeeze too much, and very slowly he stroked down.

Gray hummed in pleasure. Sure, it was not the same as the Dragon Slayer's hot skin against his flesh, but this was Natsu pleasuring him. However…

"Uh, wait."

"What?" Natsu cried out in a voice-cracking panic.

"No, it's fine, feels great, but I should put a condom on. Don't want the mess to get everywhere."

"Oh! R-Right. Um, can I do that?"

"As long as you're wearing the glove. Not with the other hand."

"I can do it one-handed, I think. I want to try putting it on."

He looked so eager, it was adorable. Gray rolled over and opened his nightstand drawer. He pulled out a square package and handed it to Natsu. Natsu tried to rip it open with his teeth like had so often seen Gray do—it looked really sexy when he did that—however, the package slipped and almost sliced his bottom lip.

"Idiot. Open it normally."

Natsu pouted that Gray had enough practice to do something like that, and here he had never opened a condom package in his life. He tore it open with his fingers, pulled out the rubber, and awkwardly tried to align it to Gray's erection.

"Yeah, it rolls down … no, other way. Flip it."

They laughed as Natsu got the condom on upside down. Gray reached over to help, but Natsu pulled the condom away, determined to do this by himself.

"Fine, fine," Gray chuckled at such adorable stubbornness. "Remember to pinch the top so there's no air bubble."

"Right. Pinch the tip and roll it down."

Gray groaned as Natsu rolled the condom along his length.

"Like that?"

"Mm-hmm."

"You barely fit in this, you know."

"Well, isn't that a good thing?"

Natsu smiled and hummed with pleasure. Yes, a boyfriend with a big cock was certainly nothing to complain about. Once the condom was snuggly all the way down, Natsu used his gloved hand to stroke. Gray moaned at the heat he could feel through the two barriers.

Natsu smiled as he watched Gray struggling not to make too much noise. He was always so in control, so Natsu liked to make Gray go crazy. He felt the size, girth, the veins along the shaft, and loved it all. He leaned over and kissed the condom-covered tip.

"Natsu!"

"Just that much," he assured.

"Okay. Don't scare me." He collapsed back into the pillow. That really made his heart leap. These two weeks, they had been pushing the limits of safe sex so much. "Are you all right?"

"Yeah. I kinda wish I could really feel you, but … I need to feel you … in my hand. And … and in my mouth." He gazed down intensely at Gray. "I won't go past here." He made a ring around the erection with his thumb and forefinger just two inches down from the tip.

"You shou-…"

"I need to!" Natsu insisted.

Gray frowned; he should have known Natsu would not behave himself. "Fine, but be really careful. I'm serious."

"I will." Natsu leaned over, pressed his tongue into the tip of the penis, and licking around. Gray clenched at the sheets at just that much. Then Natsu pressed his lips together tight and made the cock push inside.

"Oh God!" Gray grunted, struggling to hold himself back. He could not thrust up into that mouth. Natsu was using his gloved hand to shield himself so his chin did not come into contact with the skin around the groin. Still, feeling that fiery mouth again made Gray want so much more.

Although Natsu would have loved to suck him off, the condom tasted pretty gross. There was a layer of lubricant on the latex that was distasteful to his tongue. So after only a minute sucking, Natsu pulled away, licking the roof of his mouth to rid himself of the taste.

"Bad?" asked Gray.

"Condoms don't taste good."

"They sell flavored ones."

Natsu's eyes widened. "Flavored condoms?"

"I can buy some."

"You don't need to. You'll be well soon, and then I wanna taste just you." He reached down and let his gloved hand continue to stroke while he leaned over and kissed Gray's forehead. "Just your cock in my mouth, and your taste, your smell, how you feel ramming into my throat…"

"Shut up…"

"I miss it. Miss tasting you as you drip onto my tongue."

Gray gasped erotically. "D-Don't talk like that."

Natsu smirked. "Can I lick your neck?"

"Everywhere!" Gray shuddered.

Natsu chuckled smugly, but he knew that some places were off-limits. He nipped down Gray's neck, to his chest, and licked his nipples. He suckled one, and Gray covered his mouth to hold back a moan.

"Nu-uh." Natsu took Gray's hand and pulled it away, forcing the hand to the mattress. "I wanna hear."

"My neighbors—"

"… have been listening to us for weeks," Natsu reminded him. "I miss this. Miss feeling you. Miss touching your cock. I love how you feel in my hand. I miss the way you fit in my mouth. Like sucking a big, hard, dripping popsicle."

"Shut up! Seriously, no talking."

Natsu chuckled slyly. "You're so sensitive to dirty talk."

"When it's you, yeah."

"Oh?" Natsu asked in amusement. "Do I have a sexy voice?"

Gray barked a laugh and glanced up through heated eyes. "Damn sexy. It's sinful how hot your voice alone is. You burn me with your words."

Natsu whispered into Gray's ear, "I like burning you up." He licked around the earlobe. "I wanna melt you and have you drip all over me."

"Oh God, shut up!" he shuddered, clenching the sheets again.

"Hold onto me, Gray. Grab me as if we were making love."

Without even thinking, Gray clutched around Natsu's shoulders and clawed into his back. His whole body shuddered as Natsu's wrist sped up.

"N-Natsu! More."

Natsu kissed him hard, devouring all moans. He felt a surge in the cock, and Gray yanked his face away.

"Shit! Shit, shit, shit!"

Natsu glanced to the condom, but Gray had not come. Somehow, he had steeled himself back, although by the tension in his face and the brightness of his cockhead, he was deliciously close to losing control.

"Should I slow down?" Natsu's wrist went to a halt.

"No!" Gray screamed. "I'm seriously ready to go. Too hot!"

"I don't want you to come yet," he teased, just like Gray had teased him earlier.

"Please!"

"Not yet."

"Natsu, I … I'm seriously … oh fuck, gonna come!"

Natsu began to stroke him again. He leaned over and gently bit Gray's nipple. Gray arched up with a loud cry.

"N-Natsu! Oh fuck, Natsu! Yessss."

"So sexy," he moaned, nibbling Gray's earlobe again. "Let me hear you, Gray."

Gray gave a closed-lip moan and shook his head, trying to hold back even longer.

"I said…" Natsu thrust his thumb into Gray's mouth and pulled his jaw down to open his mouth. "…I wanna hear you."

With Natsu's thumb forcing his mouth open, Gray could not silence the heavy panting and moans. He bit that thumb, but Natsu hummed at the pain. Those narrow, pointed eyes gleamed down with sensual pleasure as he watched Gray losing control and listened to his frantic desperation.

Damn Natsu, but his hand felt too hot, too good, and Gray knew he was done for. His toes curled into the bed, and his torso clenched up.

"Nnng … Na- … ohh … Oh God, Nat- … nnngh, dammit! Ahhhhn!"

His fingers gripped Natsu's shoulders hard, pulling him down into a crushing hug as Gray's body shuddered. He dug his nails in, shaking as he felt everything building, surging, rushing through his soul and out … out into that hot hand, out to Natsu, who groaned as he felt the pulses in his fingers.

Suddenly, Natsu's teeth sank into Gray's shoulder. Blood flowed out of the incision, and he tasted Gray's arousal. That taste got sweeter and sweeter as Gray cried with climaxing ecstasy. Natsu licked up the blood with pleasure as he heard Gray's weary, slow breaths and felt the tenseness in his clutching fingers loosen up. However, the bleeding would not stop.

"What the hell?" Natsu whispered, looking at the blood as it continued to drip. He licked quicker before it snaked down to Gray's pillow.

Gray was floating on a wonderful high, but he heard something wrong in Natsu's voice. "Huh?"

"Oh crap. It should be healing. What's wrong?"

"What?" Gray panted sleepily.

"I guess it's been too long since I came. My saliva isn't healing the bite."

"Bite? Whuh…? Oh shit!" Gray grabbed his neck. "You bit me?"

"Uh, yeah…"

"Is it bleeding?" He pulled his fingers away and saw blood all over his hand. "Shit! You didn't get any in your mouth, did you?"

"I … uh … I licked it," he said sheepishly. "I was trying to heal it."

"No!" he shrieked in frigid horror. "Goddammit, why'd you bite me?"

"You know I like to."

"You asshole!" he screamed. "I have that infection."

"Huh? Oh. I … I didn't realize…" He had completely forgotten in the haze of pleasure. He had wanted to take Gray's mind off the fact that he was sick, and instead, Natsu was the one who forgot. "But you're almost done with—"

"No! Dammit!" Gray leaped out of the bed, holding his bleeding neck.

"Gray?"

"No!" He held his hand out to stop Natsu from jumping to his side.

"But I can heal you. Just touch me some more. If I have an orgasm, then I can lick it and—"

"Don't you fucking get near me," screamed Gray. Natsu froze with a stunned look of anguish. "I don't want you to catch this. Dammit, and you've already licked some. Shit! You'll have to be tested again. And I was so close … so close to being through with this. Goddammit!" he yelled in horrified rage.

"But Gray…"

"Stay there!" Gray bellowed furiously as he raced to the bathroom. "Don't get near me. Don't fucking touch me." He slammed the door, leaving Natsu with a mouth opened in protests he did not have time to say.

Gray inspected the bite in the mirror above the sink. He could see where two sets of teeth had pierced his skin. Tears came to his eyes, but he quickly got to work. He dabbed the bleeding wound with gauze, but it really was deep. He applied some medicine to stop the bleeding and put on a bandage. He could not believe he let himself get so caught up in the moment, he had not even felt Natsu doing that. This was why he had been trying to stay away. Living in Natsu's house was supposed to stop them from doing something stupid that might infect Natsu.

He had put Natsu in danger once again.

"Dammit," he sobbed softly. If Natsu got sick…

Gray suddenly punched his mirror, shattering it into shards. Belatedly, he realized that had sliced up his knuckles, and he had to tend to them as well, putting medicine and bandages on the cuts. What did it even matter anymore if he bled? He had already fucked up.

"I'm such a goddamn idiot. If I got him sick… Oh God, please don't let him be sick."

When Gray came out of the bathroom, Natsu was gone, and the collar lay on the bed, along with the key still inside the tiny padlock. He had taken the collar off himself. That was not supposed to be allowed, but Gray hardly blamed him for leaving without asking permission to remove the collar, and without even saying goodbye. Gray had been so angry, shouting like that. Now Natsu was probably mad at him.

If Natsu got sick…

And just a few more days of treatment to go before he went in to get tested again!

Stupid! So stupid! As if earlier wasn't dangerous enough, sucking on Natsu when he was sick … now this!

He could not just sit there like some whiny kid. Gray leaped up and began to clean. He had not been home in days. He dusted, swept, and straightened up the house. Anger drove him on, and he began obsessively cleaning. He rarely did that, but it was a good way to lose himself in the battle of emotions. He scrubbed his bathtub, vacuumed, polished his wooden furniture, anything to keep himself busy while he brooded. When he ran out of things to clean, he began to alphabetize his books.

As evening descended, he collapsed. He had been cleaning so much, he forgot to eat, and now his body felt the weariness of needing food. The last thing he ate had been just a few pieces of meat, cheese, and ten olives off of Natsu's toes. Still, he did not feel like eating. Hunger made him hurt, and he felt he deserved to starve for allowing himself to put Natsu at risk.

The longer he sat there brooding, the more he realized he would have to do something final. He needed to keep Natsu away … for his own safety. At least until his blood tests showed he was clear of this infection.

He heard a knock on the door and grumbled as he got up to answer it. To his surprise, the pink-haired wizard was there.

"I'm not sick," Natsu said bluntly. "I went to the doctor. He said catching gonorrhea through blood is rare—it only happens in the later stages of the illness—and if the treatment worked, you're probably clear of the infection already anyway. Still, he tested me again, and it's all clear."

Gray looked aside, unable to face him. "Thanks for finding out so quickly."

Natsu peeked inside the house. "Did you clean?"

Gray did not move to let him inside, and he could not look the Dragon Slayer in the eyes. Quietly, his voice struggling to stay steady, he said, "Go home, Natsu."

He looked up with a hurt expression. "But … I caught three fish. We're gonna have fish for dinner. Happy is probably waiting…"

"I'm not going to stay with you anymore," Gray said firmer, still unable to make eye contact.

Natsu felt a shiver up his arms. "But Gray—"

"I fucked up and I need to deal with it," he bellowed in rage. "Being around you while I'm sick is too damn tempting. I'm putting you at risk." His brow wrinkled in frustration and anger. "Living together was a bad idea. What we need is separation, not more temptation. We're not going to sleep together, or sneak into back rooms, or … or anything. I'll probably just stay home for the next few days." He felt like crying saying that, but for Natsu's own safety, he had to be firm about this. "From now on, I don't want you around. I don't want you here, and I'm not going over to your place. Just stay the hell away from me!"

He realized instantly, that came out totally wrong. Natsu backed off, but his lower lip quivered. Seeing that sad face broke Gray's heart.

"Oh Natsu, I didn't—"

He turned and ran out of the apartment. Gray began to run after him.

"Natsu!" He watched the Dragon Slayer race off. He knew Natsu was a faster runner than him, so Gray collapsed back against the door jamb and ran his hand through his hair. "Crap. I'm messing everything up."

Chapter Text

Later that night, Happy and Natsu sat together eating the fish Natsu had caught that morning. Happy joyously ate his grilled fish, but Natsu only stabbed his fork at the white flakes. Although Happy hummed with each bite and chatted about his attempts at wooing Carla—which failed, yet again—Natsu said nothing, brooding silently, his face slack as the events of that day swirled chaotically through his mind again and again.

Then suddenly, Happy said, "It's too bad Gray couldn't eat with us."

Natsu poked apart a flake of fish with his fork and muttered only, "Yeah…"

Happy was not so dense as to miss seeing the depression in his best friend. "Is he sick?"

Natsu's brow tensed, and his voice came out hoarsely. "He's already sick, Happy."

"No, I mean like with something else, like maybe his tummy hurt so he had to go home, or…" He really was worried about Natsu's sullen attitude. "Is he okay?" he asked softly.

Natsu could not look up at Happy, but he answered, "Yeah, he's fine."

Gray was fine. Gray would get well. And Natsu was well. All the stuff they had been doing, pushing the limits of what was safe, and yet he was still well. Gray should have been relieved to hear the good news. So why … why did he…?

"Natsu?" Happy looked down at the plate. Although Natsu had torn the fish apart with his fork, none of it had gone up into his mouth. "You're not eating anything. Are you feeling sick?"

An anguished tenseness crinkled the Dragon Slayer's brow. Sick? No! He wasn't sick. He was fine. He might have bit Gray a