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Lingering Sentiment

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Her touch feels like ice.

Numb and callous.

Her kisses taste like bile.

Fruitless and insincere.

I know I'm just a toy.

I'm just waste of space.

But I know how she feels.

The same way I do.

We're using each other.

I'm her main dish.

She's my starter.

My first.

Although I'd never admit it.

Why?

Because I can't have what isn't mine.

I can't feel his skin on mine.

Sending goose bumps all over my body.

I can't taste his smokey breath on my tongue.

Awakening the hidden hardness below zero.

I can't see him going down on me.

Turning magenta into violet.

That's why I'm here.

When I'll breach her moisty walls.

It'll be the closest thing.

To feel how it feels.

When I'd become one with him.

And he'd take it inch by inch.

Until there would be no turning back.

And liquid pleasure would race through our bodies.

Until nothing's left but peaceful silence.

But it'll never happen.

Not with him.

Not with her.

We're caught in the act.

I'm gone before she realises it.

Ashamed but relieved.

I dreamed a dream.

It was a dream.

And it remains a dream.

Deep inside my head.

Where it is save.

And forever loved.