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Ani's gone home, Master's gone out somewhere, and Ucchie's-- somewhere, they're not really sure where-- so it's just Bussan and Bambi left holding down the bar. Or maybe they're keeping it up; it's not like there's anyone around at this hour. It's just them and the hum of the refrigerator, the clicking of the beaded curtains, the crash of the ocean outside. The sounds of normality.

"Hey." Bambi looks over from his lazy sprawl on the other couch. Bussan turns his head a little but doesn't lift it.


"You sure there's nothing left you want to do?"

Bussan stretches his arms over his head, sinking a little more into the couch as he lets out a yawn. "I told you, I'm good." He's tired of thinking about it, anyway. It makes him feel like a ticking time bomb. "I'm happy just with normal."

"Oh. Right." Bambi doesn't sound convinced but he's quiet again for a while. Then: "What about kissing?"

Bussan looks over again. "What about kissing? I've kissed someone before, if that's what you mean."

"Yeah, that's true, of course you have." Bambi laughs a little nervously. The ensuing silence lasts for about a minute. Then: "What about a guy?"

Bussan lifts his head. "What?"

Bambi sits up, grabbing his beer glass and fidgeting with it. "You know, like, something different." He raises it halfway to his mouth before realizing it's empty and lowering it again. "I mean, unless you already have, that's fine too--"

"No way! Why would I want to kiss a guy? Who on earth would I kiss anyway?" Bussan stops in mid-hand motion, staring at his friend. "Wait, you're not suggesting--"

"What? No! Of course not." Bambi laughs again and looks down at the beer glass as if he's considering trying to drink from it again even though it's clearly empty. "That would be stupid."

"Yeah." Bussan laughs with him, though it feels like he can't quite get enough air. "Wouldn't wanna make things awkward."


They trail nervously into silence.

"...You don't... want to, do you?"

"Huh?" Bambi looks up, nearly dropping the glass. "No, of course not, no. Why, do you want to?"

"No! I was just, you know," Bussan rolls away from Bambi, drawing up his knees and staring at the lamp next to the couch. "Just checking."

Once again, silence.

"Well," Bambi says suddenly, standing up. "I should, um, probably head home."

"Yeah," Bussan agrees, quickly. He can't think of anything else to say so he just stares at the lamp and listens to the nice normal sound of the fridge and the curtains and the waves and thinks that maybe it's okay if it's awkward because it'll only be awkward for a little while, and being awkward together is better than being normal alone, right?

Bambi has his coat halfway on when Bussan sits up. "Wait! Wait a second." He sticks his hands in his pockets, then takes them out and sits on them. "This is already awkward, right? So just, let's-- let's do it."

Bambi stares at him, one sleeve dangling off his arm. "Seriously?"

Bussan nods emphatically before he can think too hard about it and sticks his hands in his pockets again. "Yeah. Might as well try it. If you want to, I mean--"

Bambi fumbles out of his coat and nearly loses his balance, landing on one knee on the couch next to Bussan. He grabs the back of the couch, half standing and half sitting, and leans over him, and Bussan closes his eyes and bunches the fabric of his pockets in his hands and braces himself-- and then opens his eyes again, because Bambi is hesitating. "What?"

Bambi narrows his eyes. "Don't laugh," he says, and kisses him.

Bussan doesn't get a chance to prepare himself again-- his eyes are open, his mouth is open, he can tell Bambi is holding his breath but he can still feel all that heat and it really is just like kissing a girl.

Bambi pulls away a second later. "There," he says, lifting his chin defiantly as if it had been some kind of dare.

"That's it?"

Bambi blinks at him. "Huh?"

"Nothing, you were just all dramatic about it for a moment there so I thought," Bussan isn't sure why he's still talking, it must be the cancer, turning him into an idiot, "I thought you were gonna like, hit me with a curveball or something."

Bambi turns pink. "Why would I do that? You're the one who said we should do it!"

"You're the one who suggested it!"

"I wouldn't have if I'd known you were going to be picky about it!"

"I'm not being picky! I'm just saying, it was like hitting the ball out of the park and then only running to first base--"

Bambi grabs his collar and kisses him again, hard. Bussan is pretty sure it's just to shut him up at first but then Bambi tilts his head and their lips move a little better together and there's a brush of tongue on his lower lip, and Bussan's never been on the girl side of this before but it's still pretty nice and he decides to just go with the flow. Bambi certainly doesn't seem to mind, for all his complaining; his hand loosens and settles on Bussan's shoulder instead, pushing him back against the couch again, only then he has to move with him and his knee hits the side of Bussan's so Bussan moves it and then Bambi is straddling him, kneeling over him on the couch and kissing him like-- like he really doesn't want to stop, actually.

They break apart. Bussan takes a breath and pulls his hands out of his pockets, not sure whether he's going to push Bambi off or pull him closer, and then looks down and-- Oh. When did that happen?

Bambi looks down and notices, too, and then Bussan notices that Bambi is, too, and then Bambi notices that he notices and the look on his face reminds Bussan of his friend looking down at him and I've always-- I've always--

"Bussan," Bambi says, quietly. Then: "Never mind."

He undoes the front of Bussan's jeans and wraps his hand around him, leaning in to kiss him again. Bussan still hasn't figured out what to do with his hands yet but it seems pretty obvious now, and it's a little weird that it's not his own but he's not going to mind if Bambi doesn't mind, and Bambi clearly doesn't mind. Is it because he's going to die? Or because he's still a virgin? Does this even count? Or is it because-- because--

He comes way too fast, and Bambi a moment later, and they break apart and pull their hands away and sit there for a moment, catching their breath. The sound of the ocean floods back in.

Bussan looks down at his hands. "...Tissues?"



Bambi climbs backwards off of him and they clean themselves silently and yeah, this is pretty darn awkward. He's just gotten off with a guy. He's just gotten off with Bambi. He's just gotten off with one of his closest friends in another of his closest friends' living room, and Bambi is probably thinking the same thing.

He bursts out laughing.

Bambi looks at him like he's gone crazy, not sure whether to be angry or concerned. "What-- what's so--"

"Sorry." Bussan catches his breath, stifling another giggle and glancing up. "It's just-- you really do get off on getting off in other people's houses, don't you?"

Bambi stares at him incredulously. "You--"

Bussan dodges the smack aimed at his head, but there's not much he can do about the rest of Bambi following it.

"Stop laughing! You said you wouldn't laugh!"

"I didn't say that! You just told me not to!"

"Because I wanted you to not laugh, dammit!"

"I thought that was just about the kissing-- mmph!"

Bambi gets him full in the face with a throw pillow. "I'm never kissing you again," he declares, grabbing his coat from where he'd abandoned it on the floor.

Bussan pulls the pillow off his face. "I'd kind of assumed that."

Bambi snorts and wordlessly starts to pull his coat on. Bussan watches him, hugging the throw pillow. The waves seem quieter, calmer now.


Bambi fiddles with the zipper on his coat. "Yeah?"


Bambi looks up, meeting his eyes. For a moment he looks like he wants to be angry again, like there's not enough time and he'd thought there would be more time and if there was just a little more time then maybe this wouldn't be so damn unfair--

Then he looks back down and nods, and a smile pulls at the corners of his mouth. "Anytime."