It’s not all the time. Not even every week. But sometimes…oh, sometimes.
Sometimes Uhura finds him in the mess hall and they sit on the same side of the table, their feet kicked up on the chairs across from them to dissuade anyone from joining them.
"I tried to sit there once," Scotty says, and shudders. “They stared at me in freezing bloody silence until I left. God, I thought they were going to murder me with their minds."
"What are they doing?" Chekov whispers nervously.
Sulu steals some of his Federation Fries; Chekov doesn’t protest. “Nobody knows."
"Everyone knows." McCoy rolls his eyes. He ducks down and points, using Spock as a shield. “You see the way their arms are crossed and their heads are close together? They’re gossiping."
"Surely the Captain and his Chief Communications Officer would have better things to do with their time," Spock starts stiffly.
"Sure they do. But that’s not what this is."
"What do you think they’re doing?" Chekov asks.
Spock squares his shoulders, the only one at their table sullen enough to put his back to tonight’s entertainment. “I find it highly illogical to speculate. In fact, the simplest solution to this nonsense is to ask." He stands, leaving his tray, and marches over to his captain and his beloved.
"Good evening," he begins, when neither of them remove their feet from the available chairs. “Your behavior is fostering wild speculation among the crew—may I inquire as to the purpose of these meetings?"
He understands, abruptly, what Commander Scott meant by ‘murder with their minds,’ as genetically impossible it is for Jim and Nyota’s species.
"…….I see," he says after a long and socially uncomfortable moment, “I will leave you to it, then."
Kirk and Uhura watch him leave the mess, aware that the eyes of their fellow command officers are glued to their every movement.
"Did you hear Senica MacLeod in Engineering might be having a baby," Uhura mutters out of the corner of her mouth in Andorian, certain in the knowledge that their friends won’t be able to lipread it.
"No, who’s the father," Kirk asks in Klingon, “because she was dating Tlngin for a while but I thought now she’d hooked up with Karey from gama shift."