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Santa Clods

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A fearsome snowstorm raged outside, covering Beach CIty in a thick layer of pure, white snow. Brightly colored lights decorated each and every building in town, causing a brilliant glow that pierced through the dark storm. Everyone was huddled inside, enjoying the wintery holiday cheer from the comfort of their homes. Everyone in Beach City was full of glee. Everyone, that is, except for a certain green alien.

“How is this planet habitable?” Peridot hissed and she glared out Steven’s front window, “Just a few moments ago it was perfectly clear outside. Now it’s...this!”

“Aw c’mon Peridot, don’t be upset. The snow is here just in time for Christmas!” Steven said gleefully.

“Just in time for what?” Peridot mumbled, her eyes still locked onto the storm.

“What?!” Steven screeched, “You don’t know about Christmas?!”

“Whatever it is, it sounds painful.”

Steven wanted to speak, but words failed him immediately. He wasn’t completely surprised that Peridot didn’t know what he was talking about, just a bit caught off guard. Putting together everything he knew about Christmas and the holiday season into a concise explanation, didn’t seem possible. Steven decided to save the more complicated bits, such as Santa or flying reindeer for a later time. After a few moments of contemplating, he settled on an answer.

“No no,” Steven laughed, “Christmas is about being happy. People give each other presents, you drink cocoa, you wear ugly sweaters, it’s fun!”

Peridot stared back blankly, “I fail to see the point.”

“It’s just about being with your family, and people you love.” Steven beamed, “Like...once the storm clears, my dad is gonna take me to go see some family of ours who live really far away. We don’t get too see them very often, so it means a lot to them.”

“People you love?” Peridot echoed with a quick glance towards the temple door, “So...do the gems celebrate with you?”

“Sorta. Pearl doesn’t really understand it either and Garnet is usually on one of her personal missions. Amethyst celebrates it...but I’m pretty sure she’s just in it for the free stuff.”

“Interesting…,” Peridot whispered, her mind racing a bit, “what else is there to do for this…’Christmas’?”

“Well,” Steven scratched his chin in thought, “there’s a lot of little traditions. Like...mistletoe!” he said, pointing to a small plant hanging from the ceiling, “When two people stand under it, they have to kiss. It’s actually kinda creepy when you think about it, I mean-”

Steven’s words were lost to Peridot, her mind moving at a mile a minute. The very idea of Christmas, like many other things on Earth, seemed arbitrary at first. But having it explained made it seem somewhat...pleasant. Exchanging gifts, developing bonds, non-optional kissing, it all seemed like a recipe for perfection. Or horrendous disaster. Whichever came first. Peridot was so busy fantasizing, she hadn’t even noticed the temple door open. Amethyst sauntered out, stretching her arms with a loud yawn.

“‘Sup nerds?” Amethyst asked with a grin.

“I was explaining the magic of Christmas to Peridot!” Steven said, his eyes glimmering like stars.

“Oh yeah right, I almost forgot about Christmas,” Amethyst laughed, “I guess that explains all the boring junk on tv lately.”

Before Steven could voice is displeasure in Amethyst’s opinion about Christmas specials, Peridot cut in, “S-so um, Amethyst,” she sputtered nervously, “do you have any plans for...uh…’Christmas’?”

Amethyst made a low humming sound in mock thought, “Mmm, no I don’t think so. Why, you getting a present for me Peri?”

“Er...well I just figured since, according to Steven, we’ll be the only ones here at the time, we could celebrate...together?” Peridot barely managed to spit out her sentence, her face growing hot.

“Sounds good to me. I think I already have a present in mind for you.” Amethyst said with a smile.

“You...you do?”

“Sure, but I gotta go back to my room to go make it. I’ll see you guys later!”

Amethyst turned and ran back into the temple, excitedly laughing to herself. Peridot’s legs nearly gave out on her, her nerves finally giving way. Step one was done, but now it was time for the difficult part. Peridot turned back to Steven, her eyes sunken a bit.

“So...what do people give each other on Christmas?”

“You usually just give people something you think they’d like or need,” Steven explained, “but really, it’s the thought that-”

“Yeah yeah whatever,” Peridot interrupted, “so what you’re saying is that I need to apply all of my knowledge of Amethyst in order to obtain the perfect gift?”

“Well....I guess, but I think she’s just happy you-”

“Nyeh heh heh ha! Well why didn’t you just say so?” Peridot cackled as she reached for her tablet, “This is going to be easy!”