To Make You Feel My Love
She’s waiting for him to come home. It’s been three days since she left D.C. and ended up at the Barton farm of all places. In hindsight, it was exactly where she needed to be. She needed Clint and Laura to help her figure out how she went from having a wonderful evening with Steve Rogers, to driving down the road with tears falling freely down her face.
When she was ready she sat down with Laura and explained what happened the best she could. It was date night, and they spent it eating dinner at her favorite Italian restaurant, followed by some quality time at Steve’s apartment in front of a cozy fire and city lights. There was music in the background, and Steve surprised her by asking her to dance. She, of course, accepted and lost herself in the lyrics:
“I know you haven't made your mind up yet,
But I would never do you wrong,
I've known it from the moment that we met,
no doubt in my mind were you belong.
I'd go hungry, I'd go black and blue,
I'd go crawling down the avenue,
No, there's nothing that I wouldn't do,
To make you feel my love.”
She thinks back on the memory, on whispering in his ear as they danced. “You know, Rogers, I may have to tell our friends that you know the words to every Adele song out there.”
Steve chuckled. “Well, Romanov… then I just may be forced to tell our friends that not only do you own every Twilight book in the series but that you’ve read them all more than once. And don’t forget that I know you own the DVDs as well.”
Not to be outdone, Natasha responded “You never did throw out those custom-made Iron Man themed underwear Tony got you for Christmas two years ago, did you?”
Steve spun her, and grinned. “You’re evil sometimes. And just so you know, they’re surprisingly comfortable.”
The music played on and Natasha smiled at him and said, “I told you dancing was easy.”
“It’s only easy when you have the right partner. Nat, can I ask you something?”
Curious, she said, “Sure. What is it?”
Steve looked into her eyes and said, “I love you. Would you consider moving in with me?”
She doesn’t remember much after that. She knows it freaked her out, which of course freaked him out. She ended up leaving and the next thing she knew, she’s knocking on Clint’s door very late at night and very confused.
After working up the courage to talk to Laura, she’s starting to understand. Basically, Natasha doesn’t think she’s good enough for Steve. She has intimacy issues that stem from her time being raised in the Red Room. The fact that she’s gotten as far in her relationship as she has with Steve she considers huge. Besides Clint and Laura, Steve is the only other person who knows that the Red Room not only took her childhood, it also took her ability to have a child of her own. She’s afraid that her infertility would hold Steve back from having the family he deserves. She doesn’t want to be the reason he never has children. They talked about it briefly once. He assured her that they could cross that bridge when they get to it. Eventually Clint and Laura got her to realize her fears were unfounded and that she did deserve a chance at happiness. That’s how she found herself back here, in Steve’s living room, waiting for him to come home. She’s not sure what his reaction will be to seeing her, but she wants to be honest and apologize for taking off on him. She had Clint text him and let him know where she was so he wasn’t completely in the dark, but he deserves better than a text message.
So now she finds herself face to face with the man that she knows she loves, and fears losing.
“Are you okay?” Steve asks.
“Yes, Steve I’m sorry I left the way I did. You deserve better than that.”
Staring into her beautiful green eyes he says the words that send the last of the walls guarding her heart crashing down. “Look, I love you, Natasha. Just stay, and we can figure this out.”
At that moment, she knows it’s true. She has been fighting this feeling for so long. She ran from it, causing them both so much pain. She made excuses and convinced herself she couldn’t give him a family. For the first time in her life, Natasha Romanov has fallen in love. “I love you too, Steve. I’m so sorry for pushing you away. But I’m here now.”
Steve uses his thumbs to wipe the tears from her face. “Nat…” Steve whispered… before dropping both hands from her face and wrapping his arms around her waist to bring her closer.
"Steve..." she whispered back.
She kisses him. It’s gentle at first but turns passionate as their desire for each other grows. She puts one hand on his muscled pec while the other grabs a fistful of his blond hair. She feels his hand stroke her breast, kneading it slowly, but ravenously. Natasha moans into their kisses with approval and tugs at his hair. She needs him.
She takes in the sight of his blue eyes clouded dark with lust. His hand on her breast squeezes a bit more, and she moans before smiling and bringing his head back down to kiss her again. His mouth forms a smirk against her own, and he slowly lifts her dress up over her head, leaving her in her black lace bra and underwear set. "You’re the only one for me, Nat. I need you. I want you. We can talk about this and work it out." he murmured huskily as he runs his hands along the inside of her thighs.
Natasha bites her lip, her mind hazy with lust. She moans against his neck as his fingers slip past her underwear. "I want you..." she groans as he is brushing his fingers against her folds. She bucks her hips towards his touch.
"Easy..." he hisses against her skin. She clings hard to his neck and is panting heavily as he lets a finger brush past her folds, making his need for her grow at the feeling of how warm and wet she was for him.
"Oh please... oh god, please Steve... I need you..." she breathlessly whispered, while mustering all her strength to drop her hands from around his neck to his pants. Steve presses his body against hers blocking her access, and the move made her growl in impatience.
"I said easy..." he chuckles in her ear, his hand gripping her butt, now sliding to her smooth thigh, her arms wrap around his neck as he walks her backwards down the hall and into the bedroom where they end up against the wall.
“I like your confident side, Rogers.” Her chuckles turn to gasps as he resumes his assault on her lower lips, now bucking her hips impatiently against his fingers.
Slowly, he strokes her, enjoying the feel of her slick walls around his fingers, and her moans sound like sweet music to his ears. He adds another finger into the mix and stroked harder, deeper, and she cries out in pleasure, but needs more. “I know babe, I got you.” Steve whispers in her ear.
“Babe….?” Natasha breathlessly responds with a smirk. Steve gives a smirk of his own as he falls to his knees in front of her. He gave a wink that’s only for her as she settles herself more comfortably against the bedroom wall, head falling back with a thud as he helps widen her stance to give him better access.
Her breath quickens when his mouth kisses its way up and up until it stops at the apex of her thighs, his hand mirroring the movement on her other thigh. Natasha exhales brutally when he licks her from top to bottom before using his teeth on her skin.
His tongue slides lower, going between her lips to lick her, making her buck her hips toward him to try and get any friction she can. Natasha lifts her right leg over his shoulder to give him better access and her hands entangle themselves in his hair. His tongue brushes over her clit very lightly, making her growl impatiently while he toys with her. She knows he’s always loved taking her apart this way. He loves to make her feel good. He groans, enjoying himself, but Natasha on the other hand, is losing her patience. “Steve, I swear if y… Oh god!”
The last of her sentence turned into a whine just as he circles her clit while plunging his finger into her. Her hips are thrusting against his mouth as he synchronizes himself with the rhythm of her movements. She moans loudly. "Steve, yes, oh… right there.” He hits the right spot, her walls clenching around his fingers and he inserts a third, making her arch her back higher. His mouth still sucking her clit, his teeth scratched it lightly while his tongue strokes it with a steady tempo. Steve speed his movements up, wincing when her heel digs deeper into his back. Both of her hands strongly clench on his head as she rolls her hips frantically.
He sucks harder again and again until she comes. “Steve, Steve. Oh, yes! I’m gonna...Steve, yes! Oh, my god!”
Finally, able to catch her breath, she gives him an appreciative hum as she runs her fingers through his hair. Steve wipes his mouth with the back of his hand and stands. Natasha stares at his reddened lips and mussed hair and flushed face. Then she just chuckles, and kisses him, so sated but still wanting more at the same time. Wanting him.
Their kisses grow more frantic, her lust reigniting. "I want to touch you..."She says that on a gusty breath, her hands releasing his muscled arms and dropping to his stomach. "I want to please you..." He moans against her mouth, his eyes gazing at her with nothing but pure love.
Steve nods and watches her reach for him, Natasha unbuttons and lowers his pants. The feeling of her hands stroking him over his boxers drives him wild, and he stops her movements and walks them towards his bed. Once there, Natasha pushes him into a sitting position at the foot of the bed while she kneels in front of him.
She watches as his face twists deliciously when she gives him a hard squeeze. His head drops back with a moan when she pulls down his boxers and takes him in her mouth. She licks and sucks, loving the noises he was making.
Eventually he’s miserably restless, and he grabs her shoulders and pulls her up. “Nat, I need you, please!”
Natasha chuckles, and straddles his lap. “I’m yours, soldier,” she says with a wink. Steve uses his thumb to circle her clit, working her up again.
She moans, tightening her legs around his hips. She doesn't have time to say anything else as he lifts her up and then slowly lowers her onto him, making them both moan in pleasure at the feeling of being one. Putting her hands on his shoulders, she moves up and down, slowly at first before quickening her pace. His one hand grips her hip, and his other hand grabs her butt to meet his thrusts, pulling her towards him every time he thrusts forward.
"Yes, just like that" she moans, wrapping her arms around his neck and buries her face in his shoulder. Her constant moans only serve to arouse him more, and his need to bring her to the edge grew. He sucks on the sensitive spot behind her ear, making her shiver in pleasure.
She grinds herself down and swirls her hips against him. Their connection is amazing. As they gaze into each other’s eyes, they know what the other needs. Steve moves, gently moving Natasha on her back, changing their position while still inside her. He lets himself look at her in this moment, and he knew that this is what it means to make love. This past year, since they’ve started sleeping together, it was great sex, but sex. However, in this moment, they both know that this is more. It’s love. They are made for each other. Slowly, they work up a powerful rhythm together. A sweet give and take. They lace their hands together and rest them above her head as their pleasure builds. “Steve…I’m close. You feel so good.”
“Look at me, Nat.” Steve says, and she does. Steve releases one hand to twists her nipple, at the same time circling and grinding his hips into her to hit that spot inside that will throw her over the edge. It does. “Steve, I love you, I love you!” Natasha cries out as she climaxes.
That takes him over the edge with her. “Oh, Nat…I love you so much! Love you!”
Lying together in the quiet afterglow, Steve’s arms slip around her waist, as he holds her to him. He places a kiss on crown of her head, lingering there.
Natasha looks up at the man she loves. “Steve, I’m sorry I left. I didn’t know how to handle what I was feeling. When you asked me to move in with you I panicked. I panicked because I didn’t know if I could be what you want. I was taught that love is a weakness, but I know now that it’s not a weakness. It’s a strength. And I love you so much, Steve Rogers.”
She tries to go on, but Steve looks at her with such reverence and says, “You, Natalia Romanova are deserving of love. If I must remind you of that every day for the rest of our lives, I promise you I will. I love you, and I always will. You are my home, Nat. I want you to take your time. I don’t want to rush you. I will be here when you’re ready. I promise you, Nat. We will do this at your pace.”
Natasha wipes away her tears. Knowing in her heart what she feels, she's finally not afraid to ask for it. She looks at Steve and says, “Marry me?”
Steve sits on his couch with his fiancé’s feet resting in his lap. There’s music playing in the background, one of the couple’s favorites. The song ends with these lyrics:
“I could make you happy, make your dreams come true. Nothing that I wouldn’t do. Go to the ends of the earth for you. To make you feel my love.”
“So, what do you think, Rogers?” Natasha asks him when the song finishes.
“I think you’re right. It’s the perfect choice. What do you think?”
Natasha grins. “I think we found our wedding song, soldier. We do have one problem though.”
Steve looks puzzled. “What’s that?”
“We might need to consider moving the wedding date up a couple of months,” Natasha answers.
“Wait, what? Pepper will kill us if we change anything…so why?” Steve asks, a bit confused.
Natasha smiles, “Because if we wait much longer I don’t think I’ll fit into my dress anymore.”
“I don’t get it, Nat,” Steve says.
She simply smiles and says, “I’m pregnant, Steve!”
He’s speechless, and he has the same expression she had on her face when Bruce confirmed the results a few days prior. Thinking back, she remembers the conversation she had with Bruce.
“Nat, you’re pregnant. I’ve ran the test three times.” Bruce told her with a smile.
“Wait, wait, wait. I don’t understand, Bruce. You know what the Red Room did to me. You’ve seen my files. It’s not possible, how is this possible?” She had asked trying to make sense of what was being said.
“The only explanation is Steve’s sperm has healed the damage in your womb, reversing your infertility. Do I need to get technical here, Nat? Or do you understand what I’m saying?
She remembers feeling so many emotions in that moment. “No, I understand Bruce. Basically, you're telling me that Captain America has a magical healing dick?
Bruce chuckled. “For lack of better phrasing, yes. Yes, he does.”
She smiles at the memory. Coming back to this conversation she watches as the realization of the situation is hitting Steve. He has a huge grin on his face, and is looking at her with such amazement. They have a lot to talk about, and it’s not going to be easy, but she can see that he’s just as happy about this as she is.
Later that evening they are in bed, Natasha’s head on Steve’s chest, a comfortable silence around them. Steve shifts her on his chest so he can look her in the eyes. “What are you thinking about?” he asks her as his hand runs through her hair.
She answers, “I was thinking, it had to be you.”
“What had to be me?” he says.
Natasha smiles at him. “It had to be you, Steve. You’ve knocked down the walls around my heart, and given me a future that I didn’t think I deserved, or wanted. There’s only one person in the world who could’ve given me the chance to be a mother. Thank you, Steve.”
“I love you so much, Nat!” He says against her lips.
She moans as he reaches for her and grinds their bodies together. “Babe...don’t start something you can’t finish.”
“Babe?” he chuckles.
“Mmm…less talking, more kissing, soldier!
“Yes, ma’am,” he says.