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FFA Madness

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Title: Not What You Think
Author: Christy
Rating: FR 15
Fandom/Theme: Buffy/X-Files
Disclaimer: I own none of the characters featured here. They belong to their respective creators and production companies.
Distribution: NeverNormal, TtH, AO3
Series: FFA Madness #34
FFA Pairing: Willow/Fox Mulder
Spoilers: None
Summary: Mulder finds out there's more to life than aliens.

Willow sat down in the car, pinching her nose and muttering something along the lines of “It's never as easy when they actually believe,” but Mulder wasn't quite sure. He'd been in the X-Files for six years, and after Scully was shot and put on leave last year, he'd expected another case of Krycek, but got another redheaded scientist. Though, to be honest, she'd always believed more of the outlandish stories than even he had, mostly those about demon possession, magic, and non-alien abductions. As Willow had told him when they first met, “It's not that I don't believe in aliens, but some things I've found to have more concrete evidence as of yet.” Yet, with their latest case, he hadn't known what to believe.
One moment, they'd been going to interview the women who'd witnessed a massacre in LA, and the next, Willow had whipped out a cross, pointing it at the two ladies and muttering things in Latin while pushing Mulder behind her, even as her hair bled from blood red to black to pure white.
“Ooh, the little witch likes the Dark,” the brunette woman cooed as she jumped up and down while clapping her hands.
His partner of nearly three years kept the cross steady and on the two in front of her while she rolled her eyes. “Really, Dru? Why do you think I got with the FBI? Because Angel and Buffy need a little more help against the likes of you, especially since Cordelia told me how you and Darla here made Angel go dark again.”
Fox frowned in confusion as the blonde pouted. “It's not our fault that he couldn't handle things- he tried to get me Redeemed, but there's no help for those of the Order of Aurelius- we all go insane in the end,” she commented with a grin.
“Not my fault that most of your line likes to torture before turning,” Willow rejoined with a shrug. “As it stands, I'm guessing you two were the reason for the massacre in the first place, so we'll be sure to reflect that in our reports.” Turning to go, she led Mulder in front of her, then held up a finger in remembrance, and turned back around. “Oh, and if you try to follow us in the next twenty minutes, there's a timer spell on the mantle. Try and pass through it before the twenty minutes is up and you'll both get a little warm and crispy. Night, ladies.”

****

Once back in the car, Willow had taken the driver's seat while Mulder simply sat in the passenger seat, still a bit stunned. They were halfway back to their hotel before he said anything. “How did you know who- what they were? There's nothing in your files to indicate-”
“Actually, there is. I grew up in Sunnydale, California, home to the Boca del Infierno.”
Fox tried to remember his high school Spanish. “The Mouth of Hell?!”
“Yep! Grew up on the Hellmouth; helped defeat demons, vampires, ghosts, and one computerized guy who wanted to kill Mrs Summers.”
“So how'd you get into the Academy?”
Willow shrugged as she took the next exit. “Let's just say the Army owed me a few favors after the Scooby Gang help clean up their mess,” she said caustically enough to make him wince.
“And, those, uh, vampires back there?”
“Darla and Dru? Bad bitches of the worst kind. I'm not surprised you bought their sad, traumatized little girl routine- it's worked for them both for a couple centuries now. That's how Darla hooked Angel the first time,” she told her partner offhandedly as they pulled up in front of the Hyperion.
“Wait, you mean your friend Angel is a vampire?”
“Yep,” she chirped and she headed inside and Fox followed behind, shaking his head.
And I thought aliens were bad.