Something touched his shoulders, instantly the hunter woke up, staring into blue, familiar eyes:"Wha- Cas?"
Released the angel breathed out:"my apologies"
"What is wrong? What are you doing here?" Dean reached for his beside lamp and switched it on, it hasn't been completely dark before but he felt better seeing his friend clear.
"Nothing" the Winchester raised his eyebrows:"come on, you wouldn't wake me if it's nothing"
"I said I'm sorry"
Dean sighed and sat up:"Cas, talk to me.. What's wrong?"
Castiel hesitating started to retreat: "I..I wasn't sure if you're dead."
Dean smiled confused:"why would I be dead?"
No answer. The smile on the hunters face fainted:"I don't die so easily. I mean, I already did a few times but I'm fine as you can see"
Castiel nodded:"yes. It's fine"
"It is not! Tell me why you look so terrified! Is there anything I should know?"
"It doesn't matter... Just that... when I was in heaven... Naomi.."
"Naomi, the bitch that has been controlling you?"
"Well..yes. she forced me to hurt you.”
Castiel clenched his fists: ”Dean”
“She made me kill you."
Dean looked at his opposite horrified:"Why would she make you do that?"
"I don't know. I lost count how many times I did it, but still.."
The Winchester fixed Castiel with his eyes: "Cas, it wasn't your fault. It was Naomi, she's been doing his to you."
Castiel avoided Deans look, his head turning towards one of the weapons Dean had
decorated a wall with:"it was still me..."
The hunter pressed his lips together, thinking about the right thing to say but only words like "pull yourself together" came to his mind.
Suddenly something unexpected happened.
Cas came closer, kneeling next to the bed he let his face sink into Deans lap.
Silently his arms reached around his friends hip.
Dean took a breath and softer words than usual left his lips:"it's okay. I'm fine"
A pleasant feeling went through his body, a feeling that didn't belong here right now.
He calmly breathed out and let his fingers wander trough Cas' hair.
For a moment no-one spoke, then, finally Castiel broke the silence:"I need you more than you can imagine"
Deans heart made a jump, his hand resting on the back of angels head.
Who would ever need him? Sam definitely didn't need him anymore. He had caused everyone so much pain, so how could this brave celestial being ever need him?
He didn't need him in Purgatory, he didn't need him when he went to work with Crowley.
"I'm sorry, I didn't want to make you uncomfortable"
Castiel got up, sad looking down and Dean grabbed the angels sleeve before he could vanish like he always did:"wait."
Cas lowered his gaze and unsure Dean came closer.The hunters blood rushed through his veins, nervously realising what he wanted to do right now.
Castiel watched him, suddenly managing to read the signs, a line between his eyebrows appeared, making Dean even more hesitant.
But then the angel leaned in, closing the gap between them with a kiss.
Cas closed his mouth, then opened it again, tasting the human who seemed to tremble, then he pushed him down on the bed, Dean pulled his angel closer to him,
his fingers clenching into Castiels back.
He moaned as they separated, both staring into each others eyes: "Dean-"
The angel, heavy lying on the hunter found himself wanting more than a kiss and before he could continue Dean shook his head and
with a smile pushed Castiel off him so he could roll on top and continue.