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The One With the Haunted Silverware

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It started the same way every other one of their "cases" starts--everyone parked around one of the tables in the basement, which everyone has loving begun to refer to as "The Patty Tolan Public Library", as it had been filled with a ridiculous amount of IKEA shelving units, which contained books. Colossal amounts of books, of every possible genre and topic. History of the paranormal? Written by the best, of course. Map books? Got 'em in bulk, baby. An entire unit entirely dedicated to crappy 10 for 1$ harlequin romance novels that no one would fess up to owning? Yup. Those, too.

Anyway, regardless, it started like a normal case. Everyone had parked themselves around a table in The Patty Tolan Public Library, with a file folder in front of them.

"So," Abby began, standing at the head of the table.

"Here's the deal. Luxury hotel in an 'undisclosed location' has a ghost problem. Uh...owners say that to their knowledge, people have been complaining about "paranormal instances" since before they were owners, blah blah blah, lots on antiques, blah blah blah, says that it appears the ghosts haven't actually hurt or killed anyone yet, buuuuuut they seem to be, and I quote, much more aggressive as of late. The owners are offering six figures, and free rooms and meals for as long as we need to stay and for a week afterwards," Abby recited, flipping through her copy of the file to find details.

"All in favour say 'Ay', all opposed say 'Nay'," she added, to a round of all the ladies unanimously cheering 'ay'.

"I could use an all expense paid vacation," Patty said, standing up.

"A hotel? What's the worst it could be, haunted silverware?" Erin replied.

"Holy shit, really hoping it's haunted silverware!" Holtzmann cheered, grinning in her iconic "I'm-not-really-crazy-I-just-look-like-it" fashion.

"Get cracking then. Flight leaves at 3 tomorrow morning," Abby yelled over the din, already heading upstairs.





2:30 the next morning sees the four Ghostbusters with hazy eyes and horribly packed luggage.

"Remind me why the hell we're here at ass o'clock in the morning? I thought this hour was a myth," Patty groaned, sipping an over brewed, burnt airport coffee.

"Demon silverware," Holtz replied, looking as wide awake as ever.

"Do you not require sleep?" Erin asked, glaring at her friend.

"I do, hot stuff. I'm dying on the inside, believe me. As soon as we board this God forsaken plane, I'll sleep. I've been going..." Holtz said, staring at her watch, oblivious to the way Erin's face lit up red at being called 'hot stuff'.

"26 hours, now."

"Jesus Christ, take a nap once in a while," Patty butted in, scrubbing her face with her hands and sighing.

"I'm...not a fan of planes. I figure that if I sleep, I won't act like a very stressed out cat. That's what my ex girlfriend told me I reminded her of when we flew home to visit her family one year," Holzmann rambled, the lack of sleep becoming more obvious (and obviously going to her head).

"We think you're a very nice cat," Erin was quick to inform her, which earned her the worlds cutest smile from Holtz, and glances of "Bitch, what?" from Patty and Abby.

"Not really a cat person,' Patty said. Abby chimed in with "Allergic. To cats."

Erin rolled her eyes, and put an arm Holtz's shoulder, which she reciprocated by wrapping an arm around Erin's waist. Abby was obviously just about to sass them out of sheer exhaustion as the boarding call for their plane rang out across the airport.

"Showtime, ladies," Holtzmann said, helping Erin up, and gathering her luggage.


"Not yet showtime,' Holtz corrected as they found their way to their seats. She'd been unceremoniously shoved into the window seat. Next to her was Erin, then Abby, then Patty closest to the aisle. She swallowed thickly as she watched the runway, and all their surroundings begin to move. She bit her lip, and dug her nails into the armrest.

"Hey. Hey," Erin said, pulling down the blinds so Holtz couldn't see things move, and flipping up the armrest to put her arm around her friend again.

"You're alright, Jill. We won't let anything happen to you," Abby promised, leaning across them to pat Holtzmann's knee.

"Thanks, guys," she whispered, as Patty simultaneously emitted a loud snore. Holtz chuckled nervously, as the other two laughed loudly.

It was at this point when they noticed that the rest of the plane was empty.

"I don't really know what I was expecting. Who flies the red eye from New York to Arizona on a Tuesday?" Abby joked.

"Yeah, you know, why are we flying from New York to Arizona at 3 am on a Tuesday?" Erin asked.

"Oh! Right. They wanted us to be subtle. So we're going to get there at about 8:30, adjust that for the two hour time difference, 10:30. Their check ins start at 11, so we'll have enough time to get something to eat and arrive with the rush. They've asked us not to tell their staff or other guests why we're there, and to be as quiet and non-destructive as possible," she explained. Holtz and Erin nodded.

"Do we have a disguise? Fake names?" Holtz asked with a little too much glee, and Abby chuckled.

"No fake names, but if anyone asks why we're there, we just say we're vacationing," Abby assured them, yawning. Erin nodded, and yawned too, and even Holtz was blinking slowly and barely listening. Erin de-tangled herself and Holtzmann, and stretched out before curling up as well as she could in an airplane seat.

"Well, I'm going to sleep. I'll see you in Arizona," Abby mumbled.

"Wake me if you need me, Jill," she added.

"Me too," Erin whispered, not realizing that Holtzmann was already dead to the world.