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It Sucks Being A Health Inspector

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“Gabe,” Sam said, muffled by the kisses Gabriel kept pulling him down for while he was locking up the coffee shop for the night. “Gabe, look... I can't... I work here!”


“So? It's after hours, it's dark, the window faces an alley, we're all alone... what more do you need?” Gabriel wheedled. “Come on, Samsquatch, do me by the donuts,” he purred, making Sam wonder just how big a food fetish Gabriel could possibly have. Judging from the noises he regularly made over pastry, Sam would venture it was pretty huge, although he hadn't personally tested that theory. Yet.


“If my supervisor found out, I'd get fired!”


“But he won't find out. I don't know about you, but I don't plan on telling him,” Gabriel argued, still clearly bent on kissing all good sense right out of Sam.


“That's... I don't... we shouldn't–”


“Oh ho, yes, we should. We really, really should.”


Sam wavered, unable to withstand Gabriel's charms completely. And while his head was still bravely trying to resist, Sam's body had just plain given up, and quite without his permission his arms had wound themselves tightly around Gabriel, and it sure seemed like he was kissing back somehow. Dammit.


“You're helping me clean up after.”


“Deal,” Gabriel said gleefully and seemed about to jump Sam, but Sam beat him to it. If this was happening, Sam was totally calling the shots.


Gabriel's breath left him in a surprised “oomph” when Sam shoved him up against the doorjamb and unceremoniously slid his hand into his pants. Only, where he'd expected to find boxers, there was... nothing.


“Commando? You son of a bitch, you planned this?!” Sam growled and bit Gabriel's lip for emphasis.


“Not so much planned as– ah! As hoped...”


The startled gasp from Gabriel was followed by a stuttering moan as Sam closed his hand around Gabriel's cock and gave it a few slow strokes, easily coaxing it to full hardness. As tempting as it was to take Gabriel apart right there by the door, there was always the problem of height difference when they were standing, so Sam gave one last squeeze before pulling his hand out and hoisting Gabriel off the floor with a firm grip on his ass. Gabriel was clearly a very big fan of that, and practically climbed his way higher, hitching his legs around Sam's hips and hauling himself up by his shoulders.


“Donuts, huh?” Sam grunted as he walked carefully backwards, Gabriel clinging to him like a limpet.


“Fuck yeah,” Gabriel panted, and dove in to lick at Sam's neck, distracting him so much that he had to stop moving for a moment.


“Oh God,” he sighed, and Gabriel huffed a little laugh into his ear. Which was just unacceptable. Sam was the one running this show. So he spun them around and quickly took the last few steps to the counter and dumped Gabriel down on it with a thump that made the register rattle. Finally at a more manageable height, Sam dug both hands into Gabriel's hair and pulled him in for a kiss that pretty much made his toes curl if the noises were anything to go by. Sam pulled out all the stops, licking, nipping and sucking first the upper, then the lower lip. Gabriel kept trying to follow the movements of his tongue, like a cat following the hand stroking its head, and when Sam pulled away briefly, Gabriel swayed forward, slack-jawed and dazed, hungry for more.


Before he got too far, Sam took a firm hold of Gabriel's hair and yanked his head back so he could lavish kisses on the smooth-shaven line of his throat. Scraping his teeth across the Adam's apple made Gabriel whimper, and once again try to fling all his limbs around Sam. He allowed Gabriel to pull him closer by the hips, knees locked vice-like around him. But he kept pulling Gabriel's head back, so he had no choice but to support himself on his hands to avoid falling off the counter.


Leaning back like that, Gabriel just happened to end up in the perfect position for Sam to grind up against him, and there was loud moaning of appreciation as Sam set a slow rhythm of thrusting, rubbing their cocks together through a dismaying number of layers, Gabriel's lack of underwear notwithstanding. One particularly firm thrust later, and Gabriel was scrabbling to get closer, so Sam finally let go of Gabriel's hair and allowed him to pull Sam down on top of him across the counter. It wasn't nearly wide enough, and had Gabriel relaxed, his head would have been hanging off the edge of the table. But as it was, he was clinging to Sam so desperately that it didn't matter to him.


It did matter to Sam, though, since he ended up being the one more or less holding them both up, so even though Gabriel was still trying to pull him down, Sam just hauled him back up until he was sitting on the edge of the counter and had to let his legs slide off Sam's hips. His brief noise of complaint was swiftly silenced, though, as Sam pulled him in so they were molded together from chest to crotch. Despite their noticeable difference in size, they made it work, and Gabriel panted into Sam's collarbone when he started thrusting again, keeping pressure on Gabriel's ass with both hands.


Fuck... Sam... why are we wearing so much?” Gabriel grumbled.


“Because you're a lazy fuck who hasn't even bothered to try and unzip me yet,” Sam pointed out, feeling a smirk grow larger on his face. In seconds Gabriel's hands dove down and started working on Sam's jeans and his own simultaneously. Sam spared a brief thought of admiration for his ability to multitask at a time like that, but then his cock met its velvet-soft counterpart, pressed together tightly in Gabriel's fist. They both groaned at the contact, and Sam eagerly pushed forward, only to grit his teeth at the too-dry friction. He then reached down and yanked Gabriel's hand away, bringing it to his lips. Taking a moment to gather spit on his tongue, he met Gabriel's eye over their hands and kept their gazes locked as he licked a broad, wet path across Gabriel's palm and pushed his hand down again.


As Sam licked, Gabriel made a noise that might have been a word, only it came out sounding mostly like “Guh!” as he exhaled brokenly. But he was totally in the game, if the efficient glide of his hand around them was anything to go by. Shoving back into it, Sam groaned again, this time from pure pleasure at the easy movement, and dug his fingers into Gabriel's buttocks, probably leaving bruises.


Eventually Sam remembered the other reason he'd brought them there, apart from getting Gabriel to a more manageable height. On one side of them on the counter, the register was still jingling at every thrust from Sam's hips. On the other side was a display case of donuts and muffins, stale now, at the end of the day, but they were good enough for a little test. While Gabriel was busy stroking them both and occasionally scraping his teeth across Sam's collarbone, Sam carefully reached out and snagged the nearest donut. A frosted and sprinkled thing which Sam generally disliked, but Gabriel absolutely adored. He broke off a little chunk of the top getting as much frosting as he could, and the next time Gabriel raised his head for a kiss, instead he was met by crusted-sticky fingers. For a second he froze, but then Sam nudged the frosting against his lips, coaxing them open and then Gabriel let out a truly indecent groan and latched desperately onto Sam's fingers.


Had Sam ever had any doubt that Gabriel was a kinky fuck with more than a little enthusiasm for sweet things, those doubts were now firmly banished. Gabriel licked and sucked the sugar off Sam's fingers with a wild hunger that made Sam completely forget that he was also trying to get off, here. He stopped moving, absorbed with how Gabriel's tongue flitted between his fingers, dipping in to lave at the webbing, making sure every last grain of sugar was found. And all the while Gabriel kept making noises that made Sam pant just from listening.


When there was finally nothing left to lick off, Gabriel raised his head, his pupils lust-blown and his breath erratic. Sam's mouth went very dry.


“More?” he croaked.


“Uh huh,” Gabriel nodded, seemingly unable to come up with actual words. So Sam reached down again, scraped off some more frosting, but this time took it to his own mouth, smearing it across his lips. Gabriel's eyes followed the movement of Sam's fingers, and for a second he felt stupid, standing there with a hard-on and stale donut frosting on his face. But then Gabriel flung his arms around Sam's neck, hauled him down and just fucking devoured him.


All the licking, sucking and scraping of teeth happening to Sam's lips was quite enough to make him lightheaded, but the sounds Gabriel was making... whining, whimpering, groaning and moaning, as if he was already having the orgasm of his life... Those sounds could drive a lesser man to insanity. As it was, Sam only barely managed to keep his wits about him enough to reach between them himself, his larger hand easily closing around both their cocks. But before he'd even stroked once, Gabriel keened and came all over him, jerking and twitching, still searching the corners of Sam's mouth for more sugar. When Sam tried to start some actual friction to get himself off, Gabriel hissed, oversensitive, so Sam let go, intending to see to his own business. But although he'd expected a little assistance, he was completely unprepared for how Gabriel shoved him away, hopped off the counter, onto the floor and in one swoop sucked down Sam's cock to the hilt, deep-throating like trooper. More than that even. Like he fucking wanted it, and not five minutes ago, no, right the fuck now.


Already keyed up, it didn't take long for Sam to lose it, and he met every bob of Gabriel's head with a thrust of his own, and came so hard he felt blind for a while from the color explosions on the inside of his eyelids.


“Jesus fuck,” he gasped, once he regained the power of speech.


“Mm-hmm,” Gabriel agreed, making Sam wince from the vibrations around his cock. Apparently Gabriel wasn't done yet, because he took his time to gently lick up every single drop of come he could find, only sliding his mouth off slowly once his tongue had been everywhere.


“God, you are such a kinky bastard,” Sam chuckled weakly, as he tucked himself back in with shaking hands.


“Says the guy who just went along with my food fetish.”


“All right, good point.” Only then did Sam look down at himself. “Aw dude, you jizzed all over my shirt! And I didn't bring a jacket today!”


“Oops?” Gabriel said entirely without remorse. “Come on, you should be flattered!”


“You really wanna flatter me, go get a wet towel or something.”


To his credit, Gabriel actually did help clean up the shirt and close up shop. In return, Sam pretended not to notice that he stole at least three more donuts, smuggling them home wrapped in napkins. Since he wasn't eating them then and there, Sam had a sneaking suspicion that the night wasn't even close to over.


And he was totally fine with that.