Sam Winchester has faced down demons, ghosts, and ghouls. She's pretty much confounded by the stick in front of her, though. It's got a little plus sign on it. Fuuuuuck.
"I told you," Gabriel says smugly from behind her. He spins her around, a possessive hand on her stomach. "I could feel it."
"How is this possible?" Sam bites out. "You're not even human."
Gabriel shrugs. "My Grace has been kicked into overdrive ever since the battle with Lucifer. Remember the last time we made love?"
Sam remembers the several last times they made love, long and hard and fierce as if it were the end of the world. Which it was, as far as they knew. Each time Gabriel had shielded her eyes before he came because his Grace was busting out all over. Crap.
Gabriel leads her to the bed and makes her sit down. "Apparently Dad has a sense of humor," he offers.
"If he really had a sense of humor, Dean would be the one carrying an angel baby." Sam tries not sound bitter, because really this is not a bad thing. It's a really fucking amazing thing, and she's having a hard time wrapping her head around it. Samantha Winchester, a mother.
Gabriel, a father. Crap, a Trickster father. What exactly is she going to give birth to?
"Don't worry," Gabriel soothes her. She normally hates it when he reads her mind, but right now she'll take any comfort she can get. "It will be alright. I'm not going anywhere."
Instead of being reassured, Sam bursts into tears. Damn it, Winchesters do not cry (except maybe during sex, and then it's totally justified).
Gabriel wraps his arms around her, rocking her gently, murmuring nonsense in her ear.
Naturally, Cas and Dean decide to come back early. "Hey Sam, I brought you something to eat even though you said you didn't--" Dean stands stock still, taking in the scene before him. "What the hell did you do to her, you sonofabitch?"
Castiel puts a restraining hand on Dean's shoulder, but Dean shakes him off. He's got a hand on Gabriel's collar, fingers twisting tight, as if he could possibly move the archangel if Gabriel didn't want to be moved. Gabriel releases Sam, though, and stands to face Dean.
"He didn't do anything," Sam protests. Well, apart from fertilizing her womb, thank you very much. She's scrambling for words here, attempting to pick the ones that aren't going to end up with her brother trying to take down an archangel. Unfortunately, there aren't any.
"Sam's pregnant," Gabriel says flatly, taking the air out of the room. Even Castiel seems shaken by his pronouncement. "I'm the father. You're going to be an uncle. Deal with it."
Dean looks shaken. "What the fuck? You're the father? How is that even possible?"
Gabriel smirks. "Well when an egg and a sperm love each other very much…"
Dean rubs his face with one hand. "I so did not need to hear that. Are you trying to tell me that you two have been fu-- doing it? How long?"
Sam makes a bitchy face at her big brother. "About as long as you and Cas," she snarks, and damn, Gabriel must be rubbing off on her because normally she would never try to embarrass Castiel.
Cas, meanwhile, has been looking at her like she's the Virgin Mary reborn, and it's creeping her the fuck out. "May I?" he asks tentatively, indicating her stomach.
Sam shoots Gabriel a worried look but Gabriel's territorial chest beating seems to be confined to Dean, so she shrugs and says, "Sure."
Cas puts a hand over her womb and smiles softly. "Blessed art thou," he says.
"Sure, whatever," Sam says carefully. If Castiel is going to start talking Bible speak all the time, they're going to Have Words. But Uncle Cas is already destined to be the weird one in the family, so what the hell.
"This is bullshit," Dean says, and tackles Gabriel. Sam shrieks as Gabriel rolls with the punches, actually letting Dean get in a hit or two before he pushes Dean off. His eye is already starting to swell, and Sam thinks that being a potential father is bringing out some weird-ass shit in the archangel because he looks almost happy at the damage.
Apparently he is. "This is great!" Gabriel says, extending a hand to help Dean up. Dean brushes him off and pulls himself upright. "Should we have a shotgun wedding next?"
Sam groans. "Out!" she orders. "Everybody out!"
Gabriel gives her a worried look, and she relents. "Not you," she amends, but shoots her brother a determined look. "We'll talk later."
Dean huffs, but he gathers up Castiel and drags the star-struck angel out the door with him.
"You," Sam orders. "Hold me, now."
Gabriel clambers up on the bed and draws her into his arms. "It's going to be okay," he says softly. He rubs his hand over her still flat belly. "Our kid is going to be awesome."
"That's what I'm afraid of," Sam says, but she tempers it with a smile. They are going to have a kick-ass kid, no matter what.
"And if we don't like it, we can trade it in for a new one," Gabriel offers.
He ducks as Sam smacks him.