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I'm Giving Up

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Prussia paced the kitchen in Germany’s house, waiting for someone, anyone, to remember what today was. He remembered the argument he and West had the night before, shuddering as the words screamed at him ran through his mind.

Flashback
“You're useless!! All you do is sit around on your ass und sleep! Sometimes I wish Russia had kept you! At least then I wouldn't have to deal with your constant vining and eating!” a tipsy Germany yelled at Prussia, regretting the words as soon as he saw the hurt and betrayed look on the Prussian’s face. “Prussia, I-” he started, only to be cut off by a guarded and emotionless voice. “No Ludvig. You meant every word you said. You know what they say. Drunk words are sober thoughts or whatever. Don't try to take it back.” Prussia said, before turning and walking to his room in the basement and locking the door as he descended the stairs to his sanctuary.

Flashback end

Prussia re-read the text from one of his only friends, Hungary.
I'm sorry Prussia, Roderich and I have something planned for today. If I could come over, I would, but I don't want to leave him here. I'm sorry.
He sighed, thinking back to the words the Russian had whispered into his ears he was chained to a wall in the basement “Poor Prussia. None of your friends would care if you were to die here. I even bet your brother wouldn't care.” The Russian said as he stroked the albino’s hair. Prussia shook his head, as if to shake a phantom hand away. “Nein. I bet they are planning a surprise party for me at this very moment.” He said as he attempted to convince himself. “They couldn't forget mein birthday could they?” Prussia held his grumbling stomach and got a glass of water. He had taken to only drinking water if he got hungry, due to a comment Germany made about him constantly eating. He had hoped someone would notice, try to pay attention to him, but no one had, or if they did, no one seemed to care.

He walked to his door, opening it and descending the stairs after shutting it behind him. Gilbird tweeted from his perch, making the albino smirk and stroke his tiny yellow head before putting him in his cage. Prussia picked up his old sword, the one Old Fritz gave him. He looked into the gleaming silver blade, thinking. Sighing, he stood, reaching for a pen and paper. As he wrote, Prussia contemplated everything. He thought about raising Ludwig, of Germania, of the Holy Roman Empire; everything and everyone he had ever known or done. He stopped writing after a page and a half was filled up. He smiled in success, the first real smile in a long time. He load the note on his bed, the white of the paper stark against the black sheets. Prussia looked around his room one last time before picking up the sword and driving it through his heart.

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I'm not sure when I'll be able to update. I've been working on the story and hope to update weekly, but it depends. I'm getting ready for the Fourth of July and I'm going on a pretty big trip here in a few days so I might be AWOL for a while. I Might update later this week if I'm not too busy with packing. Thank you, those that did read this, and have a wonderful day/night/week/whatever.

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Germany opened the door to his house, Aster and Blackie rushing to meet him, Berlitz lagging behind. He sighed as he stroked their soft heads, thinking of how to apologise to Prussia. He had been drinking that night, and with his tongue loosened due to the alcohol, the words slipped right out. He had contacted all of Prussia’s friends, his friends, anyone he could think of to give him ideas. It was only halfway through the day that he realised it was Prussia's birthday. “Mein gott, why did I have to say that to him? What did he do to upset me so much?” Germany asked himself as he looked around the kitchen.

Flashback
Germany watched as Prussia grabbed some wrust out of the fridge and started to heat it up. “Really bruder? We just ate.” Germany slurred out, glaring at the albino. “But Vest, I'm hungry!” Prussia whined as Germany took the wrust from him and put it back in the fridge, ignoring the protests coming from the white haired man. Germany had, of course, not noticed that Prussia had not touched his food at supper, only pushed it around. “I swear, you're going to get fat if you keep eating the way you do.” Germany said, not seeing the hurt filling his brothers eyes. Prussia laid a hand on his stomach, feeling his ribs through the skin easily. “Right. I'll get fat.” He muttered to himself as Germany turned around. He walked over to the couch and sat down, thinking that maybe the entertainment might keep his mind off of the hunger shooting through his stomach. Germany saw this and blew up. “You're useless!! All you do is sit around on your ass und sleep! Sometimes I wish Russia had kept you! At least then I wouldn't have to deal with your constant vining and eating!”
Flashback end

Germany sighed as he was nudged by Berlitz, who whined and trotted to the basement door, pawing at it. He stood and walked to the door, gently pushing the dog out of the way. The knob turned, and Germany pushed the door open quietly, as to not wake the most-likely sleeping Prussian. He walked down the stairs, an unpleasant coppery scent filing his nose, making him wrinkle his nose in disgust. He reached the bottom of the stairs and looked at the unnaturally clean room. A chirp startled him out of his silence, noticing the small yellow chick in a cage. “Hallo Gilbird. Why are you in the cage?” He asked, gently lifting the yellow ball of feathers to his shoulder. Germany saw a shock of white hair lying on the bed, and walked to it, noticing the lack of chest movement symbolising breathing. He walked over to the bed, gasping as he saw the familiar sword standing proudly out of his older brother’s chest. Grabbing his phone from his pocket, he called the only person he could think of.

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I'm not going to be updating this for a while. I found out yesterday that my dog has a tumor and the vet doesn't know if they can do anything about it. My depression and anxiety has also been hitting pretty hard too. Thanks for the people who gave this a kudos!! I really appreciate it! Have a good day/night/afternoon/whatever!

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So, the doctor found out it wasn't a tumor and we're fixing it. She's not a happy dog right now because she is in a flea collar. I will be posting another actual chapter in a little while, but it might take a couple days. Good night!

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“Hallo? Germany, please. I cannot understand you. What's wrong?” Austria asked, realising the German was crying. Hungary took the phone and said in a mothering tone, “Ludwig, sweetie, take a few deep breaths for me. Just breathe and tell me what's wrong.” “He’s dead. He… He died and it was my fault. It was all my fault.” He muttered into the phone, hearing a sharp gasp from the other side. “Germany, who’s dead? What happened? Where are you?” Hungary asked, frightened. “It's my fault. All my fault. He's dead because of me.” “Ludwig! Where are you?” Hungary snapped, jerking the German out of his daze. “I'm at home. Please, hurry.” He whispered in a cracking voice before hanging up.

Hungary closed Austria’s phone and grabbed his arm, pulling him to their car. “We need to hurry. Germany kept chanting that someone was dead and it was his fault. He's at his his house.” She explained, seeing her friend’s confused face. Austria stilled, startled, but was pulled along by the Hungarian woman. “Hurry, Roderich!” She snapped, pushing him into his car and giving him the keys. They drove in a tense silence to the familiar home just outside of Berlin, Germany.

When Hungary and Austria walked into the house, they were greeted by silence. Hungary looked around, noticed the basement door open, and walked over. Austria followed her, reaching out his hand for comfort. Hungary grasped his hand, squeezing gently. Austria jumped when something nudged him, looking down to see what it was. The Hovawart rubbed against his leg, slowly pushing him to the stairs. Hungary bent down and whistled softly. “Berlitz, sweetie, come here.” She cooed. Berlitz walked to her and whined softly, pushing his face into her neck. She glanced up at Austria, whispering “This is Berlitz. You've met Aster, the golden retriever, and Blackie, the German Shepherd. Berlitz is a bit calmer and is easier to control.” He nodded and stroked the dog’s head. Berlitz stood and walked to the basement door, looking back and whining at Hungary. She stood, brushing off her emerald green skirt, and followed the dog. “He tends to stay close to Germany, so if he's coming down here, it's likely Germany is down here.” She said reaching out to get Austria’s hand. Together, they descended the stairs.

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Germany looked up from his brother’s cold body at the sound of footsteps descending the wooden stairs. Hungary allowed her eyes to adjust, and gasped in horror. “What...what the hell happened, Ludwig?” She cried out rushing to his side and grabbing Prussia’s head as Germany let go of the body. “Austria! Don't just stand there! Come here!” She yelled, feeling how cold the pale skin of her best friend was.

Austria traded her places, and gently stroked the silver hair filling his lap. Hungary grabbed Germany and pulled him to her. He pressed his head into her shoulder and cried. She gently stroked his messy blonde hair, breaking the gel up. She looked at Austria, mouthing “Go look around his room. See if you can find anything to tell what happened.” Austria nodded, standing up and gently laying the long dead body back down. He looked around, taking everything in.

Gilbird cheered from his place on the bed, having hopped off of Germany’s shoulder. Austria picked up the papers lying on the bed and quickly read over them. “Hungary? You might need to see this.”

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Hallo everyone. I guess this the last time you'll ever “hear” from the not-so-awesome me. I'm tired. Tired of everything. Tired of being the source of West’s anger. Tired of being on the receiving end of Hungary’s frying pan. Tired of being looked down upon by Austria and everyone else. I'm sick of it! Mein Gott, I sound like a child having a hissy fit. Oh well. Es tut mir leid für alles, was jemals getan ive zu machen jemand von euch verrückt. Es gibt Zeiten, ich aufgeben wollen. Forgive me for all the pain I've caused everyone. Ich liebe euch alle so sehr. Verpassen Sie mich nicht zu viel. Abschied für immer. - Preußen, Gilbert Beilschmidt.

 

Hungary gasped, tears falling down her face once she had finished reading the letter. Austria wrapped his arms around her and held her close as she sobbed into his chest. Germany stared at the letter in shock. His legs collapsed out from under him and he buried his head into his arms on the side of the bed. Everyone was in shock.

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Hey guys. Sorry it's been so long but I've been way too busy to update and have no ideas for this fic anymore. If you would like to see certain characters or things happening, leave a comment about them please. I would love almost anything because my mind can't produce all that much right now.

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I'm back?? Happy 2017! Really late, I know, but still... I'm not really sure if I'm going to update this again becuase I lost my layout for it on google docs, plus I can't think of what to write. What do you guys think? I'd like to continue this eventually, but I don't have any ideas anymore. I've got a ton of other stuff written that I'm thinking about posting, but I want y'all's opinion.