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Sonic wakes to the soft sound of footsteps. He opens his eyes and squints blearily in the direction of the noise. At first all he can make out if a vague blob; he rubs at his eyes until the blob finally takes on a familiar shape.
"Shadow?"
Shadow doesn't answer. He stands stiffly a few paces away, nearly blending into the dark night air around him. Usually Sonic can at least see the white of his shoes and gloves, but he's not wearing those. His quills are disheveled, too, as if he came straight here after waking up—in the middle of the night, no less.
Sonic smiles gently. "Bad dream?"
Shadow's ears tilt back. "I'm not some kind of child," he says. "I don't need to be coddled like one."
That's a yes, then. Sonic hides his amusement behind a fake yawn that quickly turns into the real thing. "What happened?"
Shadow's hands ball into fists. He doesn't meet Sonic's eyes, staring at some point over his shoulder instead. He's silent for several long moments before he finally admits, "You died. I wasn't fast enough and you just…" He swallows audibly. "Vanished."
Ah. That.
"That's not what happened, though," Sonic points out, trying to keep his voice gentle instead of condescending. "I'm still here."
"I know that," Shadow snaps. He meets Sonic's eyes again, scowling. "I'm not an idiot. I just—" He looks away once more, turning his entire head to the side this time. Sonic can see his jaw work with the grinding of his teeth.
"Needed some reassurance?" Sonic guesses. Shadow doesn't respond verbally, but his ears swivel in Sonic's direction.
Bingo.
Sonic lifts one corner of his blanket, pats the soft grass next to him with his other hand. "Come on, then."
Shadow doesn't immediately move. His face goes on a journey; he grimaces, frowns, seems to almost smile for a fraction of a second before he scowls instead—but eventually his expression returns to his slightly angry-looking neutral. He closes the distance between them and drops to the ground, curling up next to him.
It's a little awkward at first. Sonic isn't prepared for just how close Shadow gets; their knees knock together and he nearly elbows him in the ribs before he understands what position Shadow is going for. He rolls onto his back and stretches out his legs, lets Shadow plaster himself against his side with his head on his chest.
Shadow can probably hear his heartbeat like this. Sonic wills it to stay calm, but it's no use; even though they officially became a couple a little over a week ago, he's still not completely used to the reality of Shadow actually touching him for non-violent reasons.
Sonic trails his fingers through the fur of Shadow's upper arm, staring up at the leafs of the tree he chose to bed down under for the night as he tries to calm down.
A few minutes pass like that, with Shadow so still and quiet Sonic almost thinks he's fallen asleep, before the black hedgehog stirs. He lifts his head just slightly off Sonic's chest and tilts it upwards to look at him, eyes roaming across his face.
Sonic smiles. "Hi there."
Shadow makes a noise like he's offended, but before Sonic can begin to question that he's leaned in to press their lips together.
They've kissed a few times now, but Sonic's heart still leaps into his throat every time. He'd been especially nervous the first time, worried that Shadow would be able to tell he's never kissed anybody, that he'd judge him for his inexperience—but to his surprise, Shadow doesn't seem to have kissed anyone before either. Even now he kisses like he's worried he's doing it wrong; it's never anything more than a simple press of their lips together unless Sonic moves things along.
He moves his lips, expecting Shadow to follow his lead like usual—but the other hedgehog pulls away instead, frowning.
"You should sleep."
Sonic huffs, amused. "Says the guy who woke me up in the first place. Make up your mind, dude."
Shadow looks away, directing his gaze at his hand on Sonic's chest instead. "I didn't mean to wake you."
"You did, though," Sonic says, trying to keep any hint of accusation from his voice. He's not mad; he'd rather Shadow come to him when he wakes up from a dream like this than drive himself crazy worrying until the sun comes up. "I'm not just gonna be able to fall back asleep, so we might as well make the most of the night."
Shadow's brows pinch together. His eyes flick up to Sonic's face, then back down. "You mean—"
"Making out, yeah." Sonic winks and grins.
Shadow levels him with an unimpressed stare, long enough for Sonic's grin to start to falter. "You're insufferable."
"…But you like me anyway?"
Shadow huffs—but before Sonic can try to backpedal, he leans in for another kiss. Sonic smiles into it, winds his hands through Shadow's quills to pull him closer. This time when he moves his lips Shadow moves with him. He's still a little reluctant; Sonic has to work to coax his mouth open, licking and nipping at his lips—but eventually he relents.
Sonic licks into his mouth. Shadow still tastes vaguely of toothpaste; Sonic can only hope he does as well, that it's still early enough in the night that he doesn't have morning breath yet. The thought distracts him, makes him lose focus—and before he knows it Shadow is growling in annoyance and taking control of the kiss.
He leans up further, places a hand on Sonic's jaw and tilts his head so he can lick into his mouth instead. His previous hesitancy vanishes; he kisses with an aggressiveness Sonic has only managed to draw out of him once before in the short time they've been together, exploring every inch of his mouth and biting at his lips.
Honestly, Sonic prefers him like this. Since they got together, Shadow has obviously been trying to be nicer to him and it's—weird. Sonic doesn't want him to change; he likes him just the way he is.
So he goes with it, kisses back enthusiastically even as Shadow pushes him harder into the ground with the force of the kiss. He pulls him closer, hooks a leg over one of Shadow's and pulls the rest of his body down on top of him as well—
Shadow tears himself away with a gasp, leaning up on his knees and the hand he sets flat on the ground. He looks almost angry—but at the same time his face is flushed, his pupils blown.
Sonic flicks his eyes down and is greeted with just about the sight he'd been expecting to see.
He looks back up, smiling. "Shadow. Do you wanna have sex?"
Shadow jerks away like he's been burnt, rolling from his knees onto his feet in one smooth motion. Sonic moves just as fast, sitting up so he can catch him by the wrist.
"Don't run away," he says. "Don't be embarrassed, either. I want to. And—" He looks meaningfully at Shadow's swollen pouch. "You clearly want to, too."
Shadow bristles, quills sticking up. "I… We—" He cuts off, grinds his teeth hard enough for Sonic to hear. "It's too soon."
It's times like these that Sonic remembers Shadow grew up in a different time. "What, because we've only been dating for a week? Who cares." He shrugs, grinning at the scandalized look Shadow shoots his way. "We've known each other for years."
Shadow's mouth twists. "It's irresponsible."
"Are you serious?" Sonic laughs. "Come on, Shadow. It's not like either one of us can get pregnant. I don't have any STIs—" He got checked, after—well. After. Just in case. "—and I'm pretty sure you can't get any, anyway. So what's the risk?"
Shadow pulls a face. Sonic bites down another laugh. "You're not gonna ruin my virtue, or something ridiculous like that, if that's what you're worried about."
"I'm not—" Shadow stops. Growls. Glares at the ground. Finally, like pulling teeth, he spits, "Fine."
Sonic lets go of his wrist with a sigh. "Never mind."
"What?" Shadow frowns. "Don't you want—"
"Yeah," Sonic says. And he does, has wanted to for longer than Shadow probably realizes—certainly much longer than he's willing to admit. "But if you're this reluctant, let's not. We can just cuddle, or—"
"I'm not reluctant," Shadow interrupts. He balls his hands into fists, tenses his shoulders. "I just…" He sighs. His gaze remains aimed at the ground.
"Shadow," Sonic starts hesitantly, "you really don't have to—"
Once again, Shadow interrupts him. "This," he says, gesturing between them, "I don't… It's all—unfamiliar territory."
Sonic frowns. He knows Shadow isn't exactly the relationship type, that he's never dated anybody before, but he doesn't understand why he would be so reluctant to admit that. It's not like—
Realization hits. Sonic gasps, feels his eyes widen in shock. "You're a virgin?"
Shadow's ears tilt back, discomfort written in every line of his body.
Sonic backtracks immediately. "No, sorry, I mean—It's not a bad thing. I was just surprised, because, y'know." He gestures vaguely in Shadow's direction.
Shadow looks down at himself, then finally meets Sonic's eyes again. His eyebrows rise in question. "Because what?"
"Look at yourself, man. You're, like, insanely hot." Saying it so bluntly is a little embarrassing; Sonic feels himself flush, does his best to power through. "How have people not been falling all over themselves to get with you? I mean, I definitely—"
Oops. Sonic shuts his mouth, cutting himself off before he can admit something truly humiliating like I've masturbated to the thought of you.
Shadow already looks uncomfortable enough as is; his entire body is tense, quills flaring, and—Sonic is pretty sure his eyes are playing tricks on him, because it looks like he's blushing.
"Have you considered," Shadow says slowly, "that I wouldn't want to do this with just anybody who throws themselves at me?"
Oh. That's… That—okay. Sonic can be cool about this. For sure.
"So you're saying I'm not just anybody?" In spite of his best efforts, Sonic feels his face split into a grin. "That I'm special?"
Shadow grunts in annoyance and takes a step away. Sonic scrambles after him, catches him by the wrist again. "Sorry, sorry. I'll be cool, I promise. It's just…" He shrugs. Smiles. "It's sweet, that you want your first time to be, y'know. Special."
Shadow growls and tears his arm free—but he doesn't walk away. Instead he stares down at Sonic, considering him.
"Don't you?"
"Don't I what?" Sonic asks.
Shadow looks at him like he just said something idiotic. It's a look Sonic is unfortunately very familiar with. "Want your first time to be special."
"Oh, well…" Sonic scratches at his cheek, laughing nervously. He's never really cared much about that kind of stuff. Sex is like food, or sleep; something that's supposed to be enjoyable and feel good. That's true for the first time as much as every subsequent time; there shouldn't be any meaningful difference.
Then again—if there's one word he would use to describe his first time, it would be just that: different.
Weird, maybe. Or—
Sonic shakes himself. He looks at Shadow, growing visibly more impatient by the second, then away. "That ship kinda sailed already."
"You—" Shadow rocks back on his heels like he got punched in the gut. "When? Who?" He sounds angry, but then he always sounds a little angry. More worryingly, he sounds sad—and that's not something Sonic really knows how to deal with. Not coming from Shadow.
But there's no way he can tell him he lost his virginity to his alternate universe self.
"It doesn't matter," Sonic says. "It was just the once. Besides," he pulls on Shadow's wrist until the other hedgehog reluctantly sinks to his knees, within reach for Sonic to cup his face and tilt it gently in his direction, "I like you much more than him, anyway."
Shadow's face softens for a fraction of a second. Sonic takes the opportunity to kiss him, gentle and slow. He gives Shadow plenty of opportunity to pull away—and when he doesn't, he deepens the kiss, rolls himself onto his back and pulls Shadow down on top of him.
All of Shadow's earlier uncertainty seems to have returned; he's back to holding back. Even when Sonic wraps a leg around his hips and grinds their pouches together, feels the heat of Shadow's dick straining to get out—Shadow moans breathily into his mouth, but he doesn't grind down in return, hardly moves at all. Sonic doesn't necessarily mind taking the lead, finds this slowness nice in its own way, but…
He pulls away with a sigh. "You're still thinking about it, aren't you?"
Shadow groans, clearly frustrated. Sonic knows he holds himself to ridiculously high standards, that he's probably disappointed in himself for being unable to shut off the part of his brain that's imagining Sonic with somebody else—
Wait, no. Just because he's a little jealous, doesn't mean he's picturing it. That would be… It—
Shadow buries his face in Sonic's neck—which is for the best, because Sonic is pretty sure he's blushing like crazy right now.
"I didn't expect…" Shadow's jaw tenses. After a long pause he mutters into Sonic's skin, so softly it's barely audible, "I thought you were still—like me."
By now Sonic likes to think he knows Shadow well. He can guess at what's going through his head—that his lack of experience in this department makes him in some way lesser, that being on unequal footing like this makes him weak, vulnerable. If Sonic allows his own mind to wander, lets himself entertain a particularly romantic interpretation, he might even think Shadow is upset because he'd been hoping they would get to share their firsts. But—
There's another option, too. A much less pleasant one.
Sonic buries a hand in Shadow's quills, strokes his fingers along the back of his neck and stares up at the night sky. "Does it bother you?" He speaks softly, but the question still sounds unbearably loud in the quiet of their surroundings. "That I didn't wait for—the right person, or whatever?"
Shadow is quiet. The silence drags; Sonic's stomach sinks. He feels sick, bile rising in the back of his throat—
"No," Shadow says, voice raspy. He lifts his head, stares down at Sonic with burning eyes. "It bothers me that I wasn't fast enough."
Sonic's stomach flips. His heart uses his ribs as a springboard, takes a running leap off and lands somewhere in the vicinity of his fingertips. Heat suffuses throughout his body, intense and hungry.
He gives into it, drags Shadow down and kisses him so hard their teeth knock together. Shadow growls into his mouth and kisses back just as fiercely. This time when Sonic grinds against him he rolls his hips downwards, drags the emerging head of his cock against Sonic's pouch.
Sonic rolls them over so he's on top, rubs himself against Shadow until he feels his own dick start to emerge—then pulls away with a gasp, sitting up.
"I've got—" He's panting too hard to finish the sentence; instead he reaches into his quills, rummages around until he finds the small tube of lube he has stashed there. He pulls it out, fumbles to press it into one of Shadow's hands, then leans down to kiss him again—
Only to stop when he notices Shadow staring at the tube with a furrowed brow.
"…Do you know—"
"Yes," Shadow snaps. His ears pin flat. "Shut up."
It's good to know Shadow at least knows how sex works; with the way he grew up, Sonic wouldn't have been surprised if he only ever learned the absolute basics of sex between a human man and woman and nothing else.
But if he knows, why isn't he getting on with it?
"So—"
"You should do it." Shadow extends the tube in Sonic's direction. "You know what you're doing. I wouldn't…"
Sonic looks at the tube. Hesitates.
On the one hand, he has some experience fingering himself now—more than he's honestly willing to admit, considering it's only been three months since he rather abruptly broke through the nerves preventing him from doing it—so doing it himself probably would be more efficient. On the other…
"It doesn't feel as good," he admits softly, "when I do it myself."
He's tried, has spent several nights now with his fingers buried in his own ass, trying in vain to reach the spot inside of himself that his double seemed to find with such ease. It's still good—but it's not the same.
Shadow's hand clenches around the tube with such force that the cap pops open and a drop of lube leaks out. "You…"
He sits up. Sonic wobbles on his lap, then topples backwards when Shadow places a hand on his chest and shoves. He keeps him pinned against the ground while he looms over him, face half-hidden in shadow.
"Who was it? Who—" He cuts himself off with a growl, turns his head to the side.
Sonic stares, wide-eyed. He tries to sit up, to resist the pressure of Shadow's hand on his chest—but it's no use. Shadow keeps him pinned like it's nothing.
Like he's nothing.
Sonic's head swims. He's so turned on he's dizzy with it; can't think, can barely breathe. Certainly isn't capable of responding.
Shadow looks at him. He stares at his face for a long moment, then drags his gaze down his body. Up again. His eyes narrow. He mutters something, too soft for Sonic to hear.
"What?" Sonic breathes.
Shadow hesitates. After several seconds he sighs and says, "Nothing."
He takes his hand off Sonic's chest. Sonic whines at the loss of contact, the noise escaping him faster than he can stop it. One of Shadow's ears twitches at the sound, but he doesn't give any other indication that he heard it. His face remains aimed towards where he's lifting the tube up to his left hand and squeezing a dollop onto two of his fingers.
He spreads it around with brusque efficiency. It's so Shadow that Sonic can only watch, mesmerized and a little dazed, until Shadow mutters, "Spread your legs."
Rarely has Sonic ever done anything faster—which is saying something.
Shadow stares, eyes trained between Sonic's legs. The longer he looks, the more self-conscious Sonic starts to feel. He squirms, stopping only when Shadow settles a hand on his thigh and brings the other to his hole. Not quite touching yet—but close enough that Sonic shivers in anticipation.
"You really want this, don't you?"
"Well, duh," Sonic says. "Did you not hear me when I said you're insanely hot? I've been—"
Fantasizing about this for years. Not that he can say that.
"—excited to do this with you pretty much from the moment we got together."
For a moment, Shadow looks conflicted—but a second later a smug expression settles on his face. He brings one of his fingers to Sonic's hole, spreads some lube around the rim, then starts to push in.
Sonic exhales and focuses on not tensing up. Shadow's finger glides in easily; it doesn't even burn.
Shadow's gaze trains on Sonic's face. He crooks his finger. Twists it, crooks it again. His brow furrows in concentration.
Sonic squirms at the odd sensation of Shadow prodding around in his insides. It doesn't feel especially good yet, just weird.
Maybe he should have done it himself, after all.
"There's—um." Sonic laughs nervously. "There's this spot—"
"I know what a prostate is," Shadow snarls. He thrusts his finger deeper, more aggressive than before. Sonic twitches at the sudden stab of pleasure, breath hitching. "What do you think I've been looking for?"
Sonic knows his double's fingers were a lot longer than Shadow's and that the other Sonic presumably had a lot more sexual experience—namely, any—so he shouldn't be surprised that Shadow can't find his prostate immediately—but he's also not exactly known for being patient.
"M-maybe…" His breath trembles. "Maybe if you add another finger—"
He cuts off with a gasp when Shadow does exactly that, pushing a second finger into him with much less restraint than he'd shown previously. It burns, finally; Sonic moans at the feeling, fights the urge to cover his mouth in embarrassment when both of Shadow's ears twitch in his direction at the sound.
"You're so needy," Shadow says. There's a rumble to his voice, a gravelly factor that shoots straight to Sonic's dick. "Were you like this before, or did the guy you had sex with do this to you?"
"Like…" Sonic trails off, bites back another moan as Shadow starts to scissor his fingers. It's rough—rougher than Shadow has been with him since they got together. More like how it was before, during fights.
More like what Sonic's been wanting.
"Like—" He tries again, finally manages to pant out, "Like what?"
Shadow pulls his fingers out halfway, shoves them back in. "A slut."
The air rushes from Sonic's lungs. His vision goes fuzzy and black around the edges as all of his blood abruptly rushes south. "W-what do you—"
"You're so desperate to get something in you," Shadow says. "I doubt this is even about me. You just want someone else's fingers up your ass because your own don't satisfy you."
"That's not…" True, Sonic wants to say. Except—
Would he have gotten up the courage to confess, if not for those nights spent alone fruitlessly trying to reach that spot inside of himself? He'd like to think he still would have regardless, but he can't deny that the thought of maybe, just possibly, getting to do this with Shadow was a motivating factor as well. Does that mean—
His head abruptly empties of thoughts when Shadow presses a third finger into him and finally—finally—brushes his prostate. He moans and instinctively grabs for his dick, stroking in time with the movement of Shadow's fingers.
"That's right," Shadow growls. "Come on my fingers."
Somehow, that snaps Sonic back to his senses. He lets go of his dick, shakes his head. "I want—" He opens his eyes, unable to recall when he closed them in the first place, and locks them with Shadow's. "Fuck me. Please."
Shadow's pupils blow impossibly wide. He bares his teeth and tears his fingers from Sonic's insides, closes his hands around both of his thighs and pulls him closer. Sonic's quills scrape roughly over the ground, but the discomfort is nothing compared to how turned on that show of strength makes him.
"You want my cock in you more than you want to come?" Shadow asks.
It's probably a rhetorical question, but Sonic still nods, the movement turning more frantic when Shadow grabs his dick by the base and aims it at his hole. He doesn't push in yet; Sonic squirms uselessly in an attempt to get him inside, kept in place by Shadow's grip on his thigh.
"Shadow," he whines, "please—"
"Can't even wait a single second." Shadow clicks his tongue. "You really are a slut."
Sonic would like to deny it, but all he can do is moan helplessly as Shadow starts to push in—though even if he were capable of speech at the moment, he's not sure if he could confidently say Shadow is wrong. His fantasies before were already far from innocent, but ever since he had sex with his alternate self, they've been more realistic, more vivid, more—
He loses his train of thought when Shadow breaches him, just the head of his dick shoving past his rim. Shadow's breath hitches, his hand tightening on Sonic's thigh to the point that it's almost painful. His entire body is tense, frozen.
"Shadow," Sonic mumbles. He wraps the leg not being held in an iron grip around Shadow's waist, uses that to try to pull him closer. "You don't have to wait. I can take—"
"Be quiet," Shadow snarls. His head dips forward, chin against his chest; he grits his teeth, brow furrowed. Almost like he's focusing. Like he's trying not to…
When the realization hits, the words slip out before Sonic can stop them. "Are you seriously about to come?"
He regrets it immediately. He's waited long enough for this; the last thing he wants is to make Shadow feel so ashamed that he never wants to have sex again. That would be—
"Shut up," Shadow snarls. He lets go of Sonic's thigh to place his hand on his throat instead. He doesn't apply a lot of pressure, doesn't even restrict Sonic's breathing at all—but his hand is still a solid weight against Sonic's windpipe, a threat and the promise of more.
Sonic moves before he thinks, grabs Shadow by the wrist to keep him in place and leans up to press his neck more firmly against Shadow's hand. He moans at the pressure against his trachea—and Shadow echoes the sound, his hips stuttering forward seemingly without conscious thought on his part.
Sonic pulls him closer with the leg around his waist, encourages him with moans and soft noises of pleasure until Shadow is seated fully inside of him. It's—good. Great, in a way; Shadow is thick enough that he can still feel the stretch somewhat, long enough for the head of his dick to nudge against Sonic's prostate. If Shadow were to fuck him the way they fight, without mercy or holding back, it could even be perfect.
"Move," Sonic says. He reaches up to clutch at Shadow's shoulders with his free hand and digs his nails in. "Please, I ne—"
The word devolves into a breathy moan when Shadow draws his hips back, then pushes back in. Shadow clutches at his waist, the fingers of his other hand twitching around Sonic's neck with every stroke. His brow is still furrowed, his jaw still clenched; he looks pissed.
Sonic doesn't know what's making him feel more lightheaded—Shadow occasionally cutting off his breathing entirely, or that look.
Shadow's hips stutter. He grunts, fingers tightening again, eyes screwing shut. A moment later he picks the rhythm back up, sends sparks of pleasure shooting up Sonic's spine again—but it's clear he's close.
And Sonic just—isn't yet.
He digs his fingers harder into Shadow's shoulder, waits until he opens his eyes to say, "More."
Shadow tears his hand away from Sonic's neck, shaking off his desperate grip on his wrist with ease. He growls when Sonic whines at the loss, baring his teeth. "You're such a needy little whore," he spits.
Arousal spikes in Sonic's gut. Shadow's next thrust punches a moan out of him, somehow even more breathless than when he was literally being choked.
"You can't even be satisfied with my dick in you? Just how desperate are you?"
Sonic can't respond, can't do much of anything except keen as Shadow brings a finger to his rim, where he's still thrusting into him, and starts to push it inside. Finally, there's the stretch Sonic has been craving, a satisfying burn that goes straight to his dick.
"Is this what you want?" Shadow growls, once his finger is in to the third knuckle. He doesn't pause to listen to Sonic's gasp of yes, just keeps talking as he continues to pound into him. "Or are you such a whore that even this isn't enough? The way you take it, I bet—ha, fuck—"
At a particularly rough thrust Sonic goes sliding across the ground; Shadow drags him back onto his dick by the grip on his waist, barely even seeming to notice his weight.
"I bet you'd still be begging for more even with my whole—ngh—whole hand inside of you. You'd—" He cuts off with a grunt, eyes squeezing shut again.
Sonic takes it as the hint it is, reaches down between them to stroke himself in time with Shadow's increasingly erratic thrusts.
It's not a surprise, exactly, when Shadow buries himself to the hilt and comes, but Sonic can't deny being a little—disappointed. Of course, it's still sex with the guy he's been fantasizing about for what feels like forever, still Shadow—but Sonic is still left wanting.
He whines Shadow's name again, mumbles something between a plea and a command for him to keep going until Shadow finally tears himself away with a snarl. He pulls out roughly, with no concern for Sonic's comfort or pleasure, and it's—
Perfect, really. It's exactly what Sonic wants, even more so when Shadow shoves three more fingers into him before any of his cum can even start to ooze out. He's still breathing hard, still looks angry. Sonic kind of hopes he'll never stop scowling.
"Can't even go a second without being filled," Shadow says. He prods at Sonic's insides until he finds his prostate, rubs at it over and over until Sonic's vision starts to spark. "You're insatiable. A slut, no better than a fucking cumdumpster—"
Sonic comes so hard he nearly forgets to breathe. His ears ring, his entire body tingling. Shadow works him through it, continues speaking even though Sonic can't hear him. Only once Sonic slumps bonelessly against the ground does he remove his fingers, much gentler than how he inserted them.
Without Shadow's fingers to keep it inside, cum starts to drip from Sonic's hole. He grimaces at the feeling of it running over his tail and reluctantly sits up. "That's not any more pleasant the second time around," he mutters.
"What?" Shadow sounds almost startled. Sonic looks at him; he's sitting a few paces away, knees drawn up to his chest. He's frowning, nose scrunched up. Clearly worried about something. "I didn't… Did I hurt you?"
Sonic smiles indulgently. He can always trust Shadow to have trouble picking up what he's putting down—but he wouldn't have it any other way.
"No." Sonic shakes his head, then pauses. "Or, well, yeah. But I like it when it hurts a little."
Shadow's brow furrows even further.
"Okay." Sonic scoots a little closer. "I can practically see you thinking. What's wrong?"
Shadow digs his fingers into the ground, displacing grass and dirt, and drops his gaze to his knees. He's quiet for long enough that Sonic reaches out to touch his shoulder—only to stop when Shadow flinches away.
"I—" Shadow lurches forward to grab Sonic's hand before he can drop it. "I'm sorry. For… For calling you—"
"Don't apologize." Sonic squeezes his hand. Twines their fingers together, looks at where they're connected so he won't have to see Shadow's face when he admits, "I liked that, too."
Shadow rubs his thumb across one of Sonic's knuckles. After another long moment of silence, he says, "I still—I don't actually think of you that way. You know that, right?"
Sonic looks back up at him; Shadow is looking at their joined hands as well, brow furrowed.
"Do I?"
Shadow looks up, eyes widening. He opens his mouth to speak, but Sonic beats him to the punch. "It's just—'cause you grew up in a different time, and you still seem sort of upset, so—"
"That's not it," Shadow says. His voice is hard, determined. "It's—I'm just…"
When he doesn't continue, Sonic raises his eyebrows and prompts, "Just?"
Shadow still doesn't immediately say anything. He works his jaw, flicks his eyes around to look everywhere except at Sonic—but eventually his eyes stick at a spot somewhere near Sonic's left ear and he says, "I'm not… too small, am I?"
Sonic blinks. It takes a moment for the words to process; when they do, he has to clap a hand over his mouth to keep his instinctive bark of laughter contained. It's not quite enough; hurt flashes across Shadow face for just a moment before a blank mask slots into place instead.
"No, hey." Sonic squeezes his hand again. "You're fine." It's not like Sonic has a lot to compare it to, but Shadow's dick is nice. A little above average in size, if he'd have to guess—and, more importantly, attached to the guy he's head over heels for.
Even so, Shadow doesn't seem especially reassured. "Then why—"
"It's not you," Sonic hurries to assure him. "I'm just—stretchy, I guess. And the other guy I've been with was…" One and a half times his size. Big. Huge, even—but he can't really say that without making Shadow feel even more self-conscious.
Shadow seemingly has no such instinct to protect his own feelings, because he asks, "How big was he?"
Sonic hesitates. He doesn't want to make Shadow feel inadequate in any way, but—if the guy wants to know, he wants to know.
He lets go of Shadow's hand. Thinks for a moment, then spreads his hands apart.
Shadow stares. A few seconds pass before his gaze dips down to Sonic's ass, then back up. He stares some more. Looks down at his own lap, where his dick has retreated back into its pouch. Looks back up. Stays silent for a beat longer, then—
"You're joking."
"I'm serious."
"How—" Shadow's eyes flick down again. "How did that even fit in you?"
Sonic drops his hands with a shrug, laughing. "I told you I'm stretchy."
"Seriously," Shadow insists. When Sonic only shrugs again, he shakes his head. "You're fucking with me. Nobody is that size."
Sonic shoves him. "Rude! Why would I lie?"
Shadow shoves him right back. "Because you like to make my life difficult."
"That's not true. Besides," Sonic smiles, nudges Shadow's ankle with his foot, "some random guy's dick size doesn't actually affect you. The only way it'd make your life difficult is if you're jealous."
Shadow stays stubbornly silent, but his glare speaks volumes.
"No," Sonic gasps, playing up the dramatics. "Not the ultimate life form! How could anybody ever—"
Shadow shoves him again, harder this time. "Shut up."
"Aw, come on." Sonic leans in, grinning. "It's cute that you feel threatened by—"
Shadow grabs him by the shoulders and pushes him flat to the ground on his back. "I said, shut up."
Sonic's grin only widens. "You know I'm not gonna stop talking. It's part of—"
He's cut off by Shadow kissing him, hard and a little frantic. Sonic kisses back after only a second to process what's happening, tangling his fingers in Shadow's quills.
Eventually, they break apart for air. Sonic looks up at Shadow, smiles when he notices how dilated his pupils are. "You up for round two?"
Shadow huffs like he's annoyed—but when he leans in for another kiss, he grinds his hips down as well.