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She doesn’t do this often.

The whole seduction thing has always been part of who she is anyway. She never really has to try with you, because every flicker and every atom that composes her attracts you with very little effort on her part.

But sometimes--sometimes she turns it all on and it’s quite the show, to say the least. The effort nearly knocks you off your feet this time. There are flowers and wine and delicious food she made herself. You’re seduced before dessert but hold out anyway because Patty has this determined way of treating you nicely tonight so you eat the food, drink the wine, and wait an hour for her to finally kiss you.

She kisses you slowly, deeply, until your legs and arms are tingling and you are sure you could hear your own heartbeat.

She undresses you and worships your skin with very kiss, whispers words you can’t make out clearly but feel in your bones. All the edge she’s well known for seems to smooth out for you in these moments and you suddenly feel very lucky.

You remember when you were fourteen, finding a crappy XXX VHS in your father’s closet. You remember the excitement you felt locking your bedroom door and turning the volume on the television all the way down before putting in the tape and pressing play on the VCR. You remember the disappointment because through the inevitable sense of arousal that comes from that sort of new exposure, the images before you were not very attractive.

Your whole life, you seemed to have been seeking that with every sexual partner. There weren’t many but they were all invariably the same when it came right down to it. That passion those two people in the video seemed to have. You were supposed to find pleasure in that so you thought you’d found it and it was enjoyable for a minute and a half, and--fun to some degree but it was bland and forced just like video.

You didn’t know how wrong they had it until Patty.

With Patty you feel a strength and a vulnerability that doesn’t measure up to anything else. Yes, you have your up against the wall, half undressed, hurried, drunken sex but there’s so much more to it than anyone will ever understand.

And even now, slowly and timed and calculated, you feel more exposed and more vulnerable than any other time. You feel your bones could easily break with every gentle pressing of her lips against you as she trails her mouth down to where you know she’ll have full control of you, where she could have whatever she wanted if she asked.

When your breathing becomes ragged, you know she can drown you and she could bruise your skin with her tongue. She whispers your name and it’s like a pounding in your chest with which your heart erratically responds. It’s too much and not enough and it’s a lot like falling off a ledge. Nothing like that video you remember and everything it’s supposed to be.