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"And I Never-"

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Radar looked at the army truck that held Choon Hi and the others, disappointed and more than a little embarrassed from what had gone down in Henry's Office. He carefully avoided looking at Hawkeye as he walked over, imagining that he would just disappear.

“Why, Radar?” he said. Radar looked at the ground, scuffed the toe of his boot against the dirt and tried even harder to disappear. With all the responsibility Radar had at the 4077, it was sometimes easy to forget that he was really still just a kid.

When it became obvious to Radar that his wishful disappearing act wasn’t going to work, he took a breath in, “Do you remember when she first came around and I said that I do, but I didn't?” the words came out in a bit of a rush, and he didn't break eye contact with the ground, terrified that he was going to find Hawkeye, or worse, Trapper making a joke of him.


“Well, I didn't because I don't, and I never-” want to. Radar couldn't bring himself to finish the sentence. He knew leaving it unsaid meant that Hawkeye would assume that he meant have. Technically it was true. Radar never had. But he never, ever wanted to either, and that was a whole 'nother kettle of fish. And sure, his adolescence was littered with examples of boyish curiosity, but when all was said and done, the whole thing just left him cold.

Radar took several breaths to steady himself, and finally plucked up the courage to look up at Hawkeye, “But I sure liked the way it felt when everybody thought I did. ” And it was true. Well, he hated the razzing that Hawkeye and Trapper and even Henry gave him when they thought he had, but Radar liked children (and they seemed to like him) and the thought of having a wife and a family. Because when it came right down to it, Radar didn't want to be alone.

“You will.” said Hawkeye. Radar looked up at him again, there was a long pause, and Radar thought that Hawkeye might just know what he'd left unsaid.

“Y-you think?” he replied tentatively. Hawkeye just smiled and nodded, and Radar smiled in relief too. He looked at the truck once more, before they both turned to walk away. Hawkeye nudged Radar's shoulder gently, and he couldn't help but smile.