Place your Hand on my Beating Heart
Tadashi gazed into Hiro's eyes, beseeching him for an absolutely clear answer.
"Hiro? Are you sure?"
"...I've never been as sure of anything," Hiro whispered, squeezing Tadashi's hand. "But um, are you...up for it?"
"...Yeah, it's fine.”
"You don't have to do this if you don't want to Tadashi. Really, you don't.” Hiro insisted. His eyebrows furrowed worriedly.
"I want to," Tadashi reassured Hiro, squeezing Hiro's hand in return. He smiled gently at his boyfriend. "Perhaps I'm not as...gung-ho as you are but...I am definitely fine with this."
Hiro searched Tadashi's eyes, double-checking for any sign of discomfort with the idea. When he couldn't find any, he sighed softly before he gently bumped Tadashi’s forehead with his own.
“Alright then. Let’s pick up from where we left off.” Hiro whispered.
"Yeah. We’ll figure it out together as we go, just like we’ve done for everything else,” Tadashi whispered back. “If it doesn't happen then it doesn't happen....if it does, then it does."
"Ok. Sounds like a plan." Tadashi couldn’t see the smile on Hiro's face, but he could hear it in his voice. He chuckled softly.
"I'll start?" Tadashi asked.
"Yeah." Hiro agreed.
"Hang on, let me just get the lube and condoms ready just in case."
“Mmm. Can you please turn off the lights too? I’ll leave my nightstand lamp on.”
Tadashi got off the bed and spent a few seconds digging through his bag; he extracted the items in question and left them on Hiro's nightstand. He then walked towards the stairs to turn off the lights; he heard the light “click” of Hiro’s lamp from behind him shortly afterwards.
“Is this light enough?” Hiro called to Tadashi. Tadashi surveyed the ambiance of the room for a moment before nodding.
“Yeah, it’s fine.”
Tadashi walked and climbed back onto the bed.
"Here…Straddle my hips." Tadashi said, propping his upper body against the headboard before pulling Hiro on top of him. Hiro comfortably settled on top of his boyfriend, eagerly waiting for Tadashi to make the first move.
After briefly considering where to start, Tadashi decided to kiss somewhere new this time around. Maybe starting in a new place would set a different mood and pace Tadashi thought. Tadashi started kissing Hiro on his hand, making sure that his lips lingered on the sensitive fingers; in addition, Tadashi kept steady eye contact with Hiro. Tadashi was rewarded with an adorably flustered Hiro and couldn't help but smirk (just a little) at Hiro in consequence. He then kissed down the length of Hiro's forearm, and was surprised to see Hiro's body literally jerk in response.
"...I've always been sensitive there..." Hiro whispered shyly. He was clearly aware of Tadashi's surprise and curiosity.
"Do you want me to kiss you more?" Tadashi asked. He smiled gently at his boyfriend.
And so Tadashi did. Tadashi slowly kissed along both of Hiro’s arms, eliciting more reflexive jerks. He’s so cute Tadashi thought to himself. Tadashi alternated between sucking and nipping Hiro’s fair skin; as usual, he made sure to do neither action too hard lest he left any bruises. Tadashi then moved to kiss along the underside of Hiro’s chin and then his jaw. Not wanting to completely abandon his work on Hiro’s sensitive arms, Tadashi rubbed gentle circles against Hiro’s skin as he affectionately kissed Hiro’s face. At some point, Hiro tried to move his head so that he could kiss Tadashi on the lips, but Tadashi purposefully leaned out of Hiro’s way. When Tadashi heard Hiro huff a little indignantly in response, he moved his lips to kiss Hiro’s forehead in slight apology.
Tadashi kissed both of Hiro’s eyelids and his nose before he beckoned for Hiro to (finally) kiss him on the lips. Though neither of them deepened the kiss (just yet anyway), both of them lingered close.
“You’re so stingy with your kisses.” Hiro muttered. Tadashi giggled.
“What are you talking about, I’ve been kissing you non-stop.”
“I meant kisses on the lips.”
“Well, teasing helps to build the mood. You know that better than anyone.”
Hiro huffed, but didn’t actually deny Tadashi’s statement (because he couldn’t really).
"Care to let me take the reins now then? I can't let you have all the fun." Hiro whispered against Tadashi’s lips.
"Be my guest." Tadashi whispered back.
Hiro wasted no time in taking Tadashi up on his offer (the younger wasn’t known for his patience after all). Hiro mirrored Tadashi's earlier course of action: he showered Tadashi's neck with gentle kisses and nibbles before he moved up towards Tadashi’s ears. When Hiro reached his ears, Tadashi subconsciously flinched away from Hiro at first. However, with a bit of gentle coaxing, Tadashi relaxed and allowed Hiro to do as he pleased. Hiro, needless to say, was very happy to lather kisses and bites all over Tadashi's ears; as he kissed Tadashi’s ears, Hiro also played with Tadashi’s hair with his thin fingers. Tadashi was quickly rendered breathless, so breathless that he didn't even notice Hiro quickly removing his own shirt (he was getting hot) and grabbing a hold of Tadashi's hands and placing them on his thin hips.
It took a slight shaking of Hiro's hips to snap Tadashi out of his stupor. Hiro was rewarded with the sight of a furiously blushing Tadashi. The cutest thing about the whole thing was that Tadashi didn't attempt to remove his hands from Hiro's hips, even though he was clearly embarrassed. But, on the other hand, Tadashi wasn't doing much of anything at all, and that just wouldn't do. Hiro sighed quietly (it was an affectionate sigh more than anything) before he reached behind him and lifted Tadashi's left hand upwards; he wanted Tadashi to touch him along his now exposed back. Tadashi laughed a shaky laugh (he was grateful for Hiro's understanding) before languidly leaving feather-light touches along Hiro's back with his left hand and massaging Hiro's hips with his right. Hiro hummed contently, not unlike how an attention-seeking cat would purr when rubbed. Tadashi then used his fingers to trail up and down Hiro's spine; Hiro visibly shivered and gasped breathlessly, tossing his head back at the sensation, shooting fire through Tadashi's nerves. The noises you make are so unfair Hiro Tadashi thought, biting his bottom lip.
Needless to say, Tadashi was starting to feel all hot and bothered too. Thus, he took a brief moment to take off his shirt and tossed it haphazardly onto the floor. When Tadashi pulled Hiro close again, the result of the skin-to-skin contact was electric; it took one heated look from Hiro for Tadashi to know that the exact same sensation was coursing through Hiro's body too. Tadashi cupped Hiro’s cheek and the two finally shared a deep, passionate kiss.
When the two broke apart, Hiro’s lower body lightly brushed Tadashi's stomach. Tadashi promptly blushed.
"You're starting to get hard..." Tadashi whispered. Hiro couldn't help but laugh shyly.
"Heh...yeah, I am. You're not...disgusted are you?"
"Of course not. Just...surprised I guess." Tadashi said, smiling at Hiro. Tadashi could never be disgusted with him.
"And maybe a little turned on yourself?" Hiro couldn't help but tease a little, gazing at Tadashi with slightly hooded eyes.
"Mmm...maybe." Tadashi said breathlessly, nuzzling Hiro's neck and inhaling deeply. Hiro burst out into giggles.
“Shall we keep going?” Hiro asked. Tadashi nodded.
“Yes.” Tadashi replied before leaning in to capture Hiro’s lips once more, much to the younger’s delight. After a few quick nibbles, Hiro deepened the kiss once more.
Tadashi and Hiro continued taking turns exploring each other's bodies and learning what the other happened to enjoy over the next couple of minutes. Tadashi enjoyed hearing all the different sounds Hiro would make more than he liked receiving touches (though it wasn't that he didn't enjoy them at all, just not as much); he also really enjoyed breathing in Hiro's scent whenever he got the chance (he smelled of citrus with just a hint of lavender). In comparison, Hiro relished touches more than anything; he constantly guided Tadashi's hands everywhere, be it his back or his chest. At one point, both Hiro and Tadashi took off their pants, and Hiro wasted no time in demanding touches along his now exposed legs; Tadashi was more than happy to comply with Hiro's wishes. Both happened to enjoy sharing silent, though no less heated and intense, eye contact in between touches and kisses as well.
Even though the pair was still a little awkward in their playful, yet intimate, game (especially Tadashi, who constantly needed Hiro's approval before trying anything ), the fact that their preferences ultimately played off one another's made the slow learning process enjoyable, not frustrating.
But Hiro, ever the more impatient one, eventually indicated for Tadashi to flip him over so that they could take the next step together. Never being one to deny his boyfriend anything, Tadashi did as Hiro asked. The two soon found their positions reversed, with Hiro lying comfortably on his back and Tadashi hovering over him.
“Hey…are you still ok with this?” Tadashi asked, taking advantage of the pause in their foreplay to talk to Hiro. He wanted to make sure that Hiro was comfortable before things went further.
“Yeah.” Hiro replied softly (but surely) before he took Tadashi's left hand and slowly guided it down his body, placing it right on top of the elastic band of his boxer briefs. Hiro made eye contact with Tadashi, silently giving him permission to proceed further down. Tadashi gulped nervously, but dutifully moved his hand down to palm Hiro's now fully-hard erection through his boxer briefs. Hiro hissed softly at Tadashi's touch.
"Do you want me to take them off?" Tadashi asked quietly, referring to the boxer briefs. Hiro nodded.
"Yeah, it's fine."
"Ok." Tadashi said before he carefully took off Hiro’s underwear.
To be quite honest, Tadashi had fully expected Hiro to not be comfortable with being naked in his presence. After all, Hiro had never had any kind of romantic or sexual relationship before; Tadashi knew that being fully naked was a common source of stress for people when they got intimate with someone else. Tadashi also remembered just how shy Hiro initially was when they were at Fred’s family island two weeks ago (and that was just his upper body). In anticipation, Tadashi had several back-up plans in mind just in case Hiro wasn't comfortable, but it didn't seem like he would need them. Admittedly, Hiro's nonchalant attitude about his own nudity threw Tadashi off just a little; it wasn't a bad thing by any means, but it still simultaneously surprised and confused Tadashi all the same.
His slight confusion must have shown on his face as he tossed Hiro’s briefs into the growing pile of clothes on the floor, because Hiro started chuckling softly when Tadashi turned back to face him.
"I'm ok with being naked because it's you Tadashi," Hiro explained softly. His cheeks were getting a little rosy but he kept eye contact with Tadashi. "You’ve clearly shown how much you care about me. Besides, it's not like I have anything you haven't seen in the mirror right? Or even anatomy class all those years ago, for that matter."
"True." Tadashi said, smiling at Hiro before leaning in to kiss him lovingly on the cheek. He could safely say that Hiro was a million times cuter and more attractive than anyone he had ever seen before in any context though.
"And if you can love my tooth gap of all things, I think you can come to love just about any other physical part of me." Hiro joked lightly, returning the gesture of lovingly kissing Tadashi on the cheek.
"What kind of logic is that?" Tadashi asked, laughing fondly. He supposed Hiro had a point though. Being so fond of a tooth gap was a little odd.
"It’s not logic. It’s just me being full of myself."
"Nah. It’s called confidence." Tadashi insisted, nuzzling Hiro's neck. Hiro snorted and rolled his eyes.
"If you say so..."
“Hang on, I need to get the lube.”
Tadashi kissed Hiro on the cheek again before he briefly excused himself to get the lube from the nightstand. After climbing back into the middle of the bed, Tadashi liberally squirted some lube onto his hands before rubbing his hands together to ensure that it wouldn't be unpleasantly cold (that was ONE particular lesson about sex that Tadashi would never forget). When he deemed the liquid warm enough, he eased Hiro into his lap and slowly reached in between Hiro’s legs; Tadashi gave Hiro’s erection a good solid pump (eliciting a soft moan) before he started a slow rhythm. Hiro whimpered and moaned softly against Tadashi’s shoulder, his cheeks flushing from the pleasurable sensations coursing through his body. This continued on for a few minutes, the two’s individual preferences once again playing off one another’s. Tadashi enjoyed listening to Hiro while Hiro enjoyed being touched.
But Hiro didn’t want the night ending with him getting off to Tadashi’s hand (no offense to Tadashi’s hand or anything), so he eventually placed his own hand on Tadashi’s to indicate that he wanted Tadashi to stop. Tadashi, being the gentleman that he was, instantly stopped upon Hiro’s request.
“Are you ok Hiro? Tired?” Tadashi asked soothingly. He rubbed calming circles into Hiro’s back with his free hand.
“No, I’m fine. Just let me catch my breath for a sec,” Hiro whispered. “You can kiss me in the meantime if you’re bored.”
It seemed that Tadashi was fond of that particular idea and took Hiro up on his offer; he busied himself with kissing Hiro’s ears and neck as Hiro took a couple of deep breaths in to calm himself. When Hiro deemed himself oxygenated enough again, he allowed Tadashi a few more seconds to lather his neck with hot wet kisses before he tugged at the waistband of Tadashi's briefs.
"These have to go mister," Hiro whispered cheekily into Tadashi's ear. "Don't keep me waiting."
Tadashi had never felt particularly self-conscious about his body (the exception being his ears), but stripping with Hiro's eyes glued on him was, admittedly, a little intimidating. He didn't need to worry about the attractiveness of his body for long though; the minute he threw away his briefs, Hiro gasped and promptly hid his face behind his hands. Well then.
"Uh...What did I do?" Tadashi asked, scratching the back of his neck in response to Hiro's reaction, slightly concerned. Did he do something wrong?
"Oh god my boyfriend's so beautiful...what am I to do? I'm not worthy." Hiro said shyly behind his hands. Tadashi burst out laughing.
"That's my line!" Tadashi said without a second thought, kissing the back of Hiro’s hands. Hiro giggled in response, but there was a slightly sad undertone to his laughter.
"How could that be? I can't compare...." Hiro whispered softly.
Hiro’s words cut through Tadashi's heart, worse than a knife. Tadashi pulled away from Hiro, his joyous mood all but evaporating.
“Hiro?” Tadashi asked, voice filled with concern.
“I don’t deserve someone like you…” Hiro whispered before he curled in on himself on the bed.
So Hiro was self-conscious about his body after all, or at least when he compared it with Tadashi's; what was even worse was that his self-consciousness about his body now made him think that he didn’t deserve Tadashi’s love. Tadashi sighed, deeply troubled by these turn of events. Where was the confident Hiro from before? What made him suddenly feel like this? Maybe it wasn’t a sudden thing. Maybe he had been hiding it from the very beginning. You just didn’t notice a part of Tadashi’s brain darkly suggested. Well, one way or another, there was only one thing left to do. I just hope he’ll take me seriously when I do this Tadashi thought.
Tadashi leaned over his smaller boyfriend and planted a tender kiss right above Hiro’s hip bone. The small gesture seemed to catch Hiro's attention; Hiro couldn’t help but peek curiously at Tadashi through his fingers.
"Hiro...come on, talk to me. Please, don't hide your face." Tadashi whispered pleadingly, his eyes begging for Hiro to listen. There was a brief pause on Hiro's end before he lowered his hands from his face, finally allowing Tadashi to look him in the eye. Tadashi smiled at Hiro before picking up his thin arm; Tadashi then held Hiro's right hand up to his chest, right above his heart.
“You feel this heartbeat? This is how I feel when I think about how adorable and amazing you are...." Tadashi whispered, closing his eyes while also squeezing Hiro’s hand in his.
Bmp Bmp Bmp
"When I think about kissing and touching you...."
Bmp Bmp Bmp Bmp
"Making love to you...."
Bmp Bmp Bmp Bmp Bmp
"....And…just being with you."
Bmp Bmp Bmp Bmp Bmp Bmp Bmp
“Do you hear that?”
Tadashi opened his eyes once more.
“That’s the sound of my love for you Hiro,” Tadashi whispered. “You’re beautiful.”
Those last words did it; Hiro needed to shut Tadashi up before his heart exploded from his selfless and supportive words. Hiro pulled Tadashi down towards him so forcibly that he inevitably missed his intended target (Tadashi's lips); instead, the two ended up bumping their heads together, quite painfully in fact.
"Shit!" the two simultaneously cursed, the pain from the collision temporarily stunning them. Both men spent a couple of seconds nursing their own throbbing heads before opening tear-filled eyes to gaze at the other.
Tadashi spoke first, giggling all the while, completely understanding the reason behind Hiro’s actions without even needing the other to voice it.
"Knucklehead...." he said fondly, kissing Hiro on the forehead, right where he had hit it against Tadashi’s. After that, he brought his face down to Hiro’s lips, waiting for Hiro to kiss him, properly this time. After a second of deliberation, Hiro did, the kiss soft and fleeting.
"....I'm sorry." Hiro said, eyes quivering in embarrassment and apology. Tadashi smiled, forgiving Hiro without even batting an eye.
"It's fine Hiro…I−"
"I love you!" Hiro blurted out before promptly covering his mouth with his hands. His cheeks flushed, not because of the words themselves but rather the context of the words. Simply put, Hiro had said the words because he was in a deep emotional panic.
Tadashi didn’t deserve getting his head hurt by Hiro’s carelessness and needing to deal with Hiro’s mood-killing insecurity. In addition, it was Hiro who had suggested they go through with all of this in the first place, yet he was being so difficult to deal with; Hiro couldn’t help but think that this must have been Tadashi’s worst sexual experience ever. All of these thoughts in combination ultimately made Hiro feel very vulnerable, so vulnerable that he thought the only way to anchor Tadashi back to him was by saying those three words. It wasn’t that Hiro didn’t love Tadashi of course (he loved Tadashi a lot ), but his words didn’t truly match up with what he had wanted to convey.
It was such an immature and selfish thing to do; it made Hiro want to hide away all over again.
What was Tadashi going to say? What was he going to do? He was probably more upset about Hiro’s words than he was about Hiro banging their heads together. Against his will, Hiro’s hands started shaking and he thought his heart would burst.
But Hiro needn’t had worried. Tadashi smiled in response to Hiro’s words, a smile that easily reached the corners of his eyes.
"I love you too. So very much Hiro," Tadashi said so sincerely, so easily, as if there wasn’t anything he knew to be truer in the world. "I love all of you. Please, don't ever forget that or doubt it.”
And just like that, a huge burden was lifted off Hiro’s shoulders; his hands stopped shaking and his heart rate slowed. Hiro didn't like to admit it, but when he hid away earlier, he had forgotten and he had doubted. But now that he was staring into Tadashi’s eyes, he couldn’t help but feel so very foolish for ever doing so; it was clear that Tadashi treasured Hiro with all his heart. Tadashi’s love wasn’t conditional on how Hiro looked or how he kissed or performed in bed; Tadashi loved Hiro for who he was, plain and simple. How could Hiro have ever thought otherwise? Then again, nerves had a nasty habit of messing with your brain, so Hiro shouldn’t have been surprised.
Some genius he was turning out to be.
But it was time for Hiro to put his doubts behind him. He was going to do this the right way, and that was having confidence in himself. He could do this.
He needed to do this.
"Let's finish this.” Hiro said resolutely.
"Yeah." Tadashi sounded so proud of him that Hiro got red all over again. Hiro then felt Tadashi kiss him lovingly on the forehead once more.
“Hey…Tadashi?” Hiro whispered softly, taking advantage of the fact that Tadashi was so close. He wanted to say the words properly this time.
“I…I…” Suddenly, the words got caught in Hiro’s throat and he couldn’t say them, no matter how hard he tried. Hiro growled quietly in frustration, but Tadashi simply smiled.
“Shh…I know Hiro I know,” Tadashi whispered, lightly patting Hiro’s cheek. “You don’t have to say it again. I understand.”
Needless to say, Hiro was very grateful for Tadashi’s empathy at the very moment; Hiro softly kissed the underside of Tadashi’s chin (it was the closest thing within reach) in appreciation. He then allowed Tadashi to pull away.
The lube on Tadashi’s hands had long dried out, so Tadashi grabbed the bottle (which had moved to the edge of the bed) once more and poured some fresh lube onto his hand. Tadashi once again busied himself with warming up the liquid between his hands for the next couple of seconds. Meanwhile, Hiro elevated his head with one pillow and then propped up his lower body with another; Hiro took a few seconds to make sure that he was comfortable before he glanced up at Tadashi.
"We'll take this slow ok?" Tadashi whispered soothingly.
"Here, raise your hips a little bit."
Hiro did as he was told; he moaned softly at the feeling of Tadashi rubbing around his entrance for the first time.
"S-stop teasing T-tadashi..." Hiro whispered.
"I'm not doing it on purpose," Tadashi said as he positioned his finger. "Are you ready?"
The first finger entered Hiro easily enough, much to Tadashi's surprise (though he wasn't complaining). He spent a couple of seconds slowly pulling his finger in and out (humming softly as he did so) and when Hiro didn't vocalize anything (be it sounds of discomfort or pleasure), Tadashi slowly inserted a second finger. Hiro reacted instantaneously this time.
"Hngh! Huh...." Hiro gasped loudly.
Tadashi gazed at his boyfriend, who had suddenly closed his eyes, his small chest rising and falling rapidly as he tried adjusting to the additional finger.
"Does it hurt?" Tadashi asked, concern for his boyfriend making him completely halt his ministrations. Hiro had adjusted so quickly to the first finger that Tadashi hadn't expected him to react so poorly to the additional of another.
"Mmm...a little...but mostly it just feels really weird..." Hiro replied, opening his eyes again. He smiled gently at Tadashi, silently encouraging Tadashi to continue. Tadashi's eyebrows wrinkled in concern.
"There's no rush Hiro...you can take more time to relax and get used to it..."
"No, I'm fine...really. Keep going."
"...Just let me know if it really hurts and I'll stop."
"Heh. I'm not glass Tadashi..."
"I know, but the last thing I want to do is hurt you." Tadashi said, leaning down to gently kiss Hiro on the lips.
"You're doing fine..." Hiro whispered reassuringly, returning Tadashi's kiss.
"Remember to breathe."
Tadashi kissed Hiro softly on the cheek one last time before resuming his work.
“Hngh…ngh…” Hiro gasped softly as Tadashi slowly pushed his fingers further in. After a brief pause, Tadashi started making scissoring motions; in consequence of Tadashi’s actions, Hiro started downright panting. It wasn’t particularly painful being stretched, but it wasn’t exactly pleasant either; Hiro’s discomfort must have shown clearly on his face, because Tadashi instantly slowed down. There must be a way to help Hiro relax Tadashi thought.
Tadashi took a moment to shift his position so that he could simultaneously kiss along the inside of Hiro’s right thigh and stretch him. Much to Tadashi’s relief, he felt Hiro finally relax a little bit after a few seconds of kissing (Hiro’s vocalizations started sounding more pleasurable). To Tadashi's embarrassment, all the noises Hiro was making were really getting to him all over again. How can anyone sound so cute? It had to be illegal Tadashi thought.
Tadashi spent the next couple of minutes simply stretching Hiro while also pampering his boyfriend's legs (and even his cute little feet) with loving kisses. When Hiro's pants died down a little, Tadashi re-lubed his fingers and carefully inserted a third finger and restarted the entire process of balancing stretching with distracting kisses all over again. He didn't stop until Hiro started whining, not from any discomfort per say but from impatience.
"Enough...already...Tadashi," Hiro insisted, his voice breathless. "It's fine. Aren't you...getting bored...down there?"
"I could never get bored of kissing you." Tadashi answered reflexively. When Tadashi's brain caught up with his mouth, he smiled goofily at his boyfriend.
"You're too much." Hiro said as he shook his head. He couldn’t help but smile though, knowing very well that Tadashi was telling the truth (even though it was cheesy as hell).
"Well I feel the same about you...especially at this moment...those noises you're making are driving me crazy."
"..." Whatever Hiro was expecting Tadashi to say, it wasn't that. Hiro's face quickly scrunched up from embarrassment at Tadashi's statement; Hiro turned over and promptly hid his face in one of the many pillows around him.
"Hey, don't be like that." Tadashi whispered, leaning in to nuzzle Hiro's cheek. He really didn’t want a repeat of what had happened before.
"Fine...then let me hear you too. It's only fair." Hiro said, his face resurfacing from the pillow. He stuck his tongue out at Tadashi, his expression indignant.
"I'd love to hear you lose control." Hiro said as he smirked, flashing his signature tooth gap.
"....." Now it was Tadashi’s turn to be embarrassed, making Hiro giggle.
"So lewd..." Tadashi said.
"Not even going to deny it," Hiro replied, chuckling softly. "But you have no right to talk. You must have been getting off on the sound of me losing control all night…haven’t you?"
"Guilty as charged..." Tadashi admitted, smiling THE most embarrassed of embarrassed smiles.
"First a size kink and now a sound kink," Hiro said, shaking his head. "You're so naughty Tadashi."
"Are we going to do this or not?" Tadashi asked, pouting. It wasn't that Tadashi was annoyed or anything; he was just really really embarrassed. Hiro couldn't help but giggle at Tadashi's adorable expression, but he quieted down quickly, not wanting to kill Tadashi's mood. He was being a little too mean, especially considering how supportive Tadashi had been the entire evening.
"Sorry sorry...Yes, we're so doing this."
"Give me a second..."
Tadashi gently pulled his fingers out of Hiro (Hiro whined a little in response to the loss of contact) before he reached for one of the condoms he had left on the bed-stand. It wasn't until he resettled on the bed and looked at Hiro that the heavy weight of reality hit him. Were they really going to be able to go through with this? He suddenly missed the teasing conversation they were having just 30 seconds prior.
"God...my hands are shaking..." Tadashi said breathlessly, laughing at himself. For the first time that evening, Tadashi felt distinctively self-conscious. It wasn't a particularly pleasant feeling.
"I'm shaking too..." Hiro replied softly, implying that he was just as nervous and that it was ok for them to be.
"I can't believe that this is actually happening..." Tadashi said as he attempted to open the small package; after a few more tugs, the package finally opened and Tadashi was able to secure the condom in his hand (much to his relief because dropping it would have been horribly uncool).
"Yeah..." Even Hiro seemed a lot more subdued all of a sudden. That in itself was unsettling.
"Are you really sure about this?" Tadashi couldn't help but ask again, always one to ask Hiro for explicit permission. Hiro nodded in response.
"I'm sure." Hiro said resolutely. Besides, he didn’t want all of Tadashi’s hard work to go to waste.
"Ok." Tadashi replied as he unfurled the condom around his erection. Hiro couldn't help but briefly bite his bottom lip in anticipation.
"Here, let me help you lube up." Hiro said, pulling himself up on his knees. Tadashi guided Hiro closer and squirted some lube onto his hands; Hiro spent a couple of seconds rubbing the liquid between his hands to warm it up (like Tadashi had done for him) before he started slowly stroking Tadashi's covered erection. Meanwhile, Tadashi nuzzled Hiro's neck while humming contently; Tadashi temporarily forgot his nervousness as he enjoyed what Hiro was doing for him.
Eventually, Hiro stopped his ministrations and gently guided Tadashi's lips to his own with his hands; Hiro kissed Tadashi deeply and sensually, silently conveying his desire for Tadashi to take him.
"I'm ready." He breathlessly whispered when his lips were a centimeter apart from Tadashi's. Tadashi kissed Hiro's neck one last time before he waited for Hiro to lower himself back down on the bed; after making sure that Hiro was comfortably laying on his side, Tadashi lifted up Hiro's hips and his right leg, positioned himself, and slowly pushed forward into Hiro.
Or, at least he tried.
"Um....you can push harder Tadashi..." Hiro said, sensing Tadashi's slight...distress when his first attempt wasn't successful (if they weren't being so intimate at the moment Hiro would've found this downright hilarious). It was clear that Tadashi was still really scared of hurting him and wasn't applying enough pressure because of that. Typical worrywart Tadashi Hiro thought affectionately.
"Ok um....Just...let me know if you feel any pain ok?"
"I will. You can do it." Hiro gently coaxed.
After spreading Hiro's butt-cheeks a little bit more and following Hiro's instructions, Tadashi's second attempt was more successful than his first; despite the tempting pressure that was starting to draw him in and surround him (god, Hiro was just so tight), Tadashi still made sure to be slow with pushing further in. It was a good thing he did, because it didn't take very long for Hiro to wince, once again feeling pain and discomfort.
"W-Wait I'm fine," Hiro said quickly. He knew that Tadashi might very well just pull out and decide to hold off having sex for weeks or something and that was the last thing Hiro wanted at the moment. "I just need to adjust to the sensation. Give me a moment."
"...Ok," Tadashi said, his facial expression drooping a little. "I'm sorry. I wasn't careful enough."
"Don't be ridiculous," Hiro replied, stretching his arm so that he could gently pat a little above Tadashi's hip bone. "You're being really careful already. A little discomfort is to be expected."
After 30 seconds of deep breathing and waiting for his body to relax, Hiro coughed slightly to indicate to Tadashi that he could start moving again. Tadashi pushed forth just a bit more; now he was almost half-way in.
"How do you feel?" Tadashi asked gently.
"Mmm....there's still a dull burn but...it's starting to feel nice," Hiro said shyly, flushing a little red. The feeling of having Tadashi inside him was unlike anything he had ever felt before (it was just so…surreal), and it was a feeling he was starting to want more of. "What about you?"
"It's...so intense . It's like something out of a dream almost." Tadashi said quietly, scared that if he spoke any louder, he might just find out that it was all a dream.
"I see. Um...so are you going to try to go any deeper? Or..." Hiro asked, unsure of what Tadashi was planning to do at this point since he had stopped momentarily. Tadashi mused for a few seconds.
"How about I'll stop going in further for now and we can just set up a rhythm with what we have. Is that ok?" Tadashi asked, gazing down at Hiro. Tadashi was scared that if he tried going any deeper, Hiro would feel pain again.
T-that's fine...do whatever you want." Hiro said, carefully rolling over so that he was now flat on his back. With slightly shaking hands, Hiro quickly moved his bangs (which were getting matted down by sweat) out of his eyes so that he could look at Tadashi. Tadashi spent a second wiping his own forehead (he wanted to make sure that drops of sweat didn't suddenly blind him or something) before he anchored his arms on either side of Hiro and started rolling his hips.
Tadashi kept his thrusts slow and shallow and surprisingly, it wasn't frustrating like he had imagined it would be; he'd rather go slowly and gently than hurt Hiro any day. If anything, Hiro's new gasps of pleasure were soon driving him crazier than the physical stimulation was anyway, so there was that too. He was very relieved that Hiro was starting to feel good again. It was only fair.
"Hiro..." Tadashi whispered gently.
"Tada...shi..." Hiro whimpered in response. He had taken to clenching the bed sheets in both hands again. "Hngh..mm...a little more to the left....please..."
Tadashi stopped his gentle rocking for a few seconds to slightly reposition himself; he almost burst out laughing at the low whine Hiro let out in consequence.
"There's no need to be so impatient..." Tadashi said airingly (the night was still young after all). Tadashi couldn’t help but lean down for a kiss, which Hiro hungrily returned, much to Tadashi’s delight. Tadashi then started thrusting again at a slightly faster (but still relatively slow) pace.
"Less talking...more thrusting..." Hiro said, wiggling his hips to meet Tadashi half way (he was beginning to sound just a little delirious). Hiro's tone of voice promptly made Tadashi's blood run hot again while Hiro's hip movements inadvertently made Tadashi penetrate him deeper for the first time. Hiro groaned loudly in consequence, whether from pain or pleasure, Tadashi wasn't sure. Tadashi was still nowhere close to being completely in (he was just a little more than half-way in at this point), but the sudden additional heat and pressure around him caught him by surprise and nearly sent him over the edge. Their rhythm temporarily stuttered.
"W-woah, Hiro wait-" Tadashi choked out, locking Hiro's hips in a way that temporarily stopped both of their movements. The fear of hurting his boyfriend by going in too deeply and quickly surmounted all other thoughts and actions; Tadashi spent the next couple of seconds taking in deep breaths lest he lost all of his restraint.
"Tadashiiiiii...." Hiro gasped out in frustration. He didn’t enjoy the sudden cessation of activity one bit; why had Tadashi stopped?
Hiro opened his eyes and looked at Tadashi in confusion and mild displeasure. But it only took one glance at Tadashi’s face (his eyes were shut tight and he was biting his bottom lip) to immediately silence him. Hiro realized that he must have inadvertently triggered one of Tadashi's "extremely-protective boyfriend" modes; as such, his displeasure was quickly replaced by utmost concern.
“Tadashi?” Hiro asked, his voice gentler this time. Tadashi didn’t respond; he was so focused on trying to regain control that he couldn’t.
Hiro sighed softly; he knew that unless he convinced Tadashi that he was ok (he really was mind you), their love-making wasn't going to continue at this point. Hiro was undeniably frustrated given the circumstances, but he knew that Tadashi was only being the caring boyfriend that he had always been. In the long-run, Tadashi's loving care was worth infinitely more than one night of sex. It really didn't take a genius to understand that.
Tadashi had helped Hiro overcome his insecurities. In return, Hiro resolved to help Tadashi overcome his fears.
Hiro took a deep breath before speaking.
"Tadashi..." Hiro said once more, his voice soft but firm. He moved his hands from gripping the bed sheets to gently holding Tadashi's broad shoulders. "You're not hurting me. I'm fine, really."
"...." Tadashi seemed at war with himself. Hiro sighed again but persisted.
"I-it feels really good ok? It doesn't hurt anymore," Hiro whispered in Tadashi’s ear, somehow becoming even redder than he already was. It was true though; the dull pain that he had been experiencing for the past couple of minutes was almost completely gone now. "So...don't stop now Tadashi…”
“P-please…I need you . " Hiro pleaded.
Hiro's voice (and his choice words) finally snapped Tadashi out of his internal conflict; after gazing into Hiro's eyes for a few seconds, Tadashi nodded silently.
"Here, lift up your hips again." Tadashi said as he propped himself up. He was still leaning over Hiro a little bit but not far enough that Hiro could hold onto his shoulders anymore.
"...Ok.” Hiro said, following Tadashi's instructions and arching his back.
Before Tadashi restarted his rhythm, he once again took Hiro's erection in his left hand; Hiro moaned loudly, taken by surprise. It took a couple of seconds for Tadashi to coordinate stroking and thrusting, but he soon found a manageable pace for both courses of action. Hiro's voice raised a couple of octaves the more Tadashi simultaneously jerked him off and penetrated him.
Despite the fact that everything Tadashi was doing was incredibly gentle (given the circumstances), it was still a lot of sensations to deal with all at once; Hiro's nerves quickly began feeling like they were going to burst. Above him, Tadashi was hardly faring better; the sight of Hiro’s body trembling from pleasure beneath him and the sounds Hiro was making were driving him absolutely insane .
"Ahh...Ta−dashi! Ahh−!" Hiro cried out. Hiro gripped Tadashi's arms (right above his elbows) and pulled him down, wanting Tadashi to be as close as possible as he rapidly approached his limit. Tadashi understood the silent message; he stopped his ministrations with his hand and instead focused on controlling his thrusts as best he could and holding Hiro close to him.
With the last of his strength, Hiro wrapped his arms and his legs around Tadashi, hanging on for dear life. Tadashi planted a sloppy kiss on Hiro's cheek before he tucked his face against Hiro's jaw line, near his ear; at last, Hiro could hear just how much Tadashi's control was slipping. Tadashi’s ragged voice made Hiro’s blood run dangerously hot, and in his heated daze, Hiro started moving his hips again to meet Tadashi’s thrusts. When Hiro once again pulled Tadashi deeper inside of him on one particular thrust, Tadashi moaned so loudly that Hiro was sure that if people were outside on the street, they would've heard him. Hiro almost came right then and there, the sound of Tadashi finally losing himself hitting him like a truck.
Tadashi raised his head to briefly make eye contact with Hiro. Hiro's eyes were so vulnerable and unguarded that Tadashi felt like he was falling right into them; it was a testament to how much Hiro trusted Tadashi that he saw this, and it just about robbed Tadashi of his breath. On Hiro's end, the sheer weight of Tadashi's gaze (there was just nothing but love in his eyes) shot through his entire body, more intimate than anything he had ever experienced.
It all became too much for Hiro; he came with a loud, strangled cry, his nails clawing at Tadashi's back as he rode out his orgasm. With a low groan, Tadashi came not too long afterwards, the sound and sight of his boyfriend achieving his climax being the ultimate cause of his own.
When Tadashi weaned off his high, he realized that he had briefly blacked out on top of Hiro, much to his embarrassment. As quickly as he could (his body felt like jelly), Tadashi moved himself off his boyfriend so that Hiro could properly catch his breath. Tadashi then carefully pulled out of Hiro (he flushed red at the lewd sound that resulted from doing so) and wrapped up the used condom so that its contents wouldn't spill onto the bed. He thought about getting rid of it right away, but he decided otherwise; Tadashi wanted to make sure that Hiro was ok before he moved away.
Slowly but surely, Hiro's breathing rate slowed down to an almost normal pace. Tadashi leaned forward to stroke Hiro's face; he then lowered himself to softly kiss his boyfriend along his neck, up to his cheeks, and then on his lips. When Hiro didn't quite respond (he did a little, but not much), Tadashi leaned further down to whisper in his ear.
"Hey..." Tadashi whispered, nuzzling Hiro's neck and breathing in his scent again. Tadashi was relieved when he heard a response.
"Hey..." Hiro whispered faintly back. He sounded so tired it made Tadashi feel like his heart missed a beat.
"Yeah...though, could you please...lift up my bangs?"
Tadashi pulled away and gently combed Hiro's sweaty bangs upwards with his hand so that his boyfriend's eyes were completely unhindered.
"That's much better thanks..." Hiro whispered, smiling up at Tadashi. The completely unguarded expression from before was gone, but was replaced with an expression of tender love; it was such a beautiful sight that Tadashi's heart swelled in response and his lips curled up so much that he felt the corners of his eyes crinkle. It feels like a dream Tadashi thought once again. A wonderful, perfect dream that I don’t want to ever wake up from.
The more Tadashi gazed into the depths of Hiro's eyes, the more he just knew that he was hopelessly in love. Mind, body, and soul.
Little did he know, Hiro was feeling the exact same way at the exact same time. Perhaps even more so actually.
But no one needed to know that, least of all Tadashi. Hiro would never be able to live it down if he found out.
The two didn't speak for a couple of minutes, simply communicating with their eyes and their smiles (after all, no words could have been as intimate). Hiro buckled first, slowly pulling Tadashi down so that he could once again capture Tadashi's lips in a kiss; they thankfully didn’t bump heads this time around. The kiss wasn't deep like the kisses they had shared before; rather, it was soft and sweet, conveying an almost innocent (but no less powerful) kind of affection. The two then simultaneously pulled the other close and wrapped their arms around each other.
After what felt like an eternity, Hiro and Tadashi separated.
"Oh man...I'm so tired..." Hiro whispered, nestling his head deeper into his pillows and closing his eyes. Tadashi chuckled fondly.
"I'd love for you to get some rest...but I don't want us to wake up with dry semen on our body, so I'll have to ask you to stay with me for a couple of minutes. We should clean up."
"Mmm...bathroom's too far..." Hiro mumbled, slowly moving his head from side to side. It was almost odd seeing such a childish gesture when they had spent the past hour doing something that was hardly child-appropriate. Tadashi chuckled quietly at the irony.
"That's fine. I was just planning on getting a wet towel or something to wipe you down with. Just don't fall asleep on me knucklehead."
'Mmm...ok." Hiro said softly, opening his eyes once more. Tadashi kissed him lovingly on the forehead before excusing himself to the bathroom.
Tadashi threw away the used condom and spent a couple of seconds cleaning himself off in the bathroom before returning with a warm wet towel for Hiro and climbing back into bed. He cleaned Hiro's face first before using the towel to clean up the rest of his body; once Tadashi was done, he tossed the towel to the floor and turned off Hiro’s lamp. He then lay back down next to Hiro. When Hiro felt Tadashi's familiar body weight to his left again, he cuddled up against his boyfriend.
"I do feel better after that, thanks." Hiro said, happily snuggling his face against Tadashi's neck. Tadashi giggled softly as he pulled Hiro’s summer blanket over them.
"Can I go to sleep now?" Hiro mumbled, yawning deeply. His doe-like eyes blinked adorably.
"Sure. Goodnight Hiro." Tadashi replied. To be honest, he was starting to get sleepy too (the hormones were catching up to him).
"Night...see you...in the morning..." Hiro whispered, his eyes fluttering shut as he curled up even more against Tadashi.
Hiro passed out shortly afterwards, his body growing heavy against Tadashi's (not that he really minded). Tadashi fought back sleep for a couple of minutes (because he wanted to relish the feeling of having Hiro so close to him) but even he eventually succumbed to the darkness. It was their first time; it was expected for one to be so tired after such a mind-blowing experience.
They could always cuddle more in the morning.
/hides behind bush
So um...who's alive after reading that whole chuck of embarrassing fluff? hahahaaa. I can tell you, I've died many many times over and over again writing it, reading it, and revising it. hahaaaa;;
All joking aside...I hope that this installment was worth the long long wait. I know I still have a lot to work on in terms of my writing, but I'm glad that for the most part, this installment captured what I wanted to do for Hiro and Tadashi's first time. It took forever balancing the right amount of sensuality and awkwardness...in the end, it probably came out more awkward than anything, but as far as I can imagine, first times are awkward. I just hope that it wasn't OVERWHELMINGLY awkward. XD;;;
I have no worries of course, that future love-making sessions/sexy tiemz will be less awkward though. Tadashi and Hiro have really grown from this experience (and all their past ones too of course) after all. The love and attraction are all there...they just need more practice. :)
With that being said, I think it's officially time that I take a hiatus from this project (lol please don't cry lol ;w;). I'm technically still working on a part two for this chapter (I don't see a lot of "morning after" fics so I think I need to remedy this haha), but excluding that...I really do not have the time to spend writing something like this anymore. At least, not in the next couple of months. I have licensing boards and adult life to worry about after all.. *SIGHS LOUDLY*
And to be honest, I feel a little burned out by this series. I've spent a lot of effort on it and I think I've hit my limit for now. For anyone who has been consistently following this series, you know how hard it has been for me to update consistently and you can tell that my earlier writing was definitely better. That being said, I still have many stories in my head that I'd love to share...so don't worry about me dropping it. :) I know how important it is to have closure myself...so yeah. I have not brought Hiro and Tadashi to an appropriate finishing line just yet lolol. I just don't want to pressure myself to update as frequently as I did before. I hope you all can understand.
Alright that's the end of my rambling for now I think lol. Thank you so much for reading! And if you feel like commenting on what worked well/what could use work, PLEASE don't feel scared about commenting! I really want to learn how to write better after all! Especially smut lololl.... which is harder to write than you might think! PHEW. loolol Imagining all the anatomy and body positions is hard enough orz
Once again, come find me on Rl4r.tumblr.com!!! I’m always lurking around (cuz I have no lifeeeeeee *punted*) and I’d love to hear what you guys thinks. Thank you in advance!
Chapter 2: Part Two
Obligatory Morning-After chapter. Because doing-the-do is never truly the end of a story.
Rather, it opens the door to new beginnings. Happy and positive ones, hopefully.
Ahhhhh. Long time no update. /weeps
I know I said that I was taking a break from writing this, but...along the way, I suffered really bad writer's block. /sighs Hence why I haven't updated in four months nor have I really talked about anything on Tumblr. I know where I want the story to go...but lately it's been hard to write. I don't really know why. It's like the story isn't letting me write it, or something weird like that hahahaa.
But then again, I have fallen in love with Voltron Legendary Defender since I posted my last update, so maybe that's why lol.
No worries though. I still haven't finished up so many of my ideas. I'm not going to just let them die without a fight :)
Anyhoo enough of my rambling. Without further ado, please enjoy this short update lol Not going to lie, it's quite filler-y. Still, hopefully it's the good kind of fillery, where the plot doesn't really move all that much but we get better insight to how the characters feel about each other and how they're going to move forward together.
(See the end of the chapter for more notes.)
“Mmm…” Hiro whispered softly as he woke up.
Hiro’s body felt really warm and light. After shaking his head a little bit, Hiro glanced to his left and saw the familiar sight of his boyfriend’s warm eyes and loving smile. Ah, of course. The reason why he felt so light and warm was because Tadashi was cuddling him.
“Hey knucklehead. Did you sleep well?”
Hiro smiled and nodded. Tadashi chuckled warmly.
“I’m glad. I love you.”
“Nerd. I love you too.”
“Come here. Let me give you a good-morning kiss.”
Hiro giggled and leaned towards his boyfriend; he felt Tadashi’s lips gently touch his own.
Hiro woke up (for real this time) shortly after that, his mind pleasantly fuzzy; unfortunately, the pleasantness didn’t last all that long. Hiro groaned quietly before he buried his head deeper into his pillow; he felt so warm and comfortable that he didn’t want to wake up. However, his attempts were in vain; he quickly became all too aware of the light that was filtering in through his window and the itchiness of his summer blanket against his skin.
Hiro was officially awake, whether he liked it or not. Well, awake enough to be unable to fall back asleep anyway. Hiro sighed discontently before he half-opened his eyes and wiggled his limbs a bit. Hiro happened to have low blood pressure (especially after sleeping for the night), so it took his body a little longer to fully wake up compared to his brain. Hiro yawned quietly and blinked a couple of times before his vision fully cleared.
Hiro was suprised to see that Tadashi was still peacefully asleep next to him (if his light snores were anything to go by). Hiro knew that Tadashi tended to be the early riser between the two of them, so this was new (but not unwelcome of course). Hiro giggled softly to himself when he noticed a small, wet patch on Tadashi’s pillow underneath his mouth. It was a tell-tale sign that Tadashi had been drooling at some point. He must have been really tired for that to happen Hiro thought.
Really tired? From what exactly?
And just like that, memories of the previous night came rushing back all at once. Hiro felt his cheeks burn as he recalled the sounds of his boyfriend’s moans and the feel of having Tadashi inside him.
Holy crap. They had done it. They had finally made love together.
Granted, a million and one things went wrong along the way (most of which were Hiro’s fault entirely), but they had done it.
“Wow…” Hiro whispered. His nerves tingled pleasantly.
Before Hiro had time to further ponder the implications of this realization, his brain decided (now, of all times) to tell him that he really needed to use the bathroom. A moment later, his brain decided to also tell him that he was completely entangled in Tadashi’s arms and partially entangled in his legs.
No wonder he had felt so warm and comfortable in his sleep. He had effectively slept in Tadashi’s protective embrace all night. Talk about being so cliche Hiro thought.
Hiro groaned to himself. Was there any way he could get out of this arrangement without waking Tadashi up? Probably not, given just how smooshed together their bodies were. Hiro briefly considered laying in bed for just a little while longer, his bladder be damned. For one, moving away would wake up Tadashi; for another, Hiro really would’ve enjoyed gazing at his boyfriend’s sleeping face for a little bit longer. It was a rare opportunity after all.
Sadly, that thought went out the window after about 30 seconds. No matter how hard he tried, Hiro couldn’t ignore the urgency that was building up inside him. I totally didn’t want to lie comfortably in bed anyway Hiro thought sarcastically to himself.
Well, maybe he could get out of this without waking Tadashi up; he just needed to be slow and careful.
It was time to put his genius brain to use then. Given that his legs weren’t as trapped as his upper body was, Hiro wiggled them out from underneath Tadashi’s legs first. When Tadashi didn’t respond to the loss of contact, Hiro gently moved Tadashi’s arm off his shoulder and placed it on the bed. Tadashi stirred a little at that (Hiro held his breath), but he remained asleep. Hiro sighed in quiet relief before he moved out from underneath the blanket and tucked it under Tadashi’s arm. He then pushed himself up.
Or at least he tried to; he hadn’t anticipated the soreness in his hips and his butt. Hiro fell back onto the bed with a soft yelp.
“O-ow…” Hiro whimpered softly before he slapped a hand over his mouth.
Tadashi must have had an instinct specifically tuned to respond to Hiro’s cries of distress or something, because he woke up almost instantly.
“Hiro?” Tadashi whispered, voice still hoarse from sleep. “What’s wrong?”
Hiro would’ve giggled if he wasn’t utterly torn about waking Tadashi up. Tadashi was definitely still half-asleep; Hiro could tell by how bleary his eyes looked. Still, the fact that he heard Hiro’s cry of distress and responded with a fully understandable question was...admirable to say the least. Tadashi was almost on par with Baymax.
But unlike Baymax, Tadashi really could use some rest right about now. As such, Hiro gently shook his head at him.
“Nothing’s wrong. Go back to sleep.” Hiro said soothingly. He prayed that Tadashi hadn’t passed the point where he couldn’t fall back asleep.
“You said ow…” Tadashi replied softly.
The two briefly stared at one another before Tadashi slowly pulled himself up to better examine Hiro. Hiro’s cheeks burned as he felt Tadashi’s gaze travel along his body. Tadashi’s gaze wasn’t sexual by any means, but it still made Hiro feel self-conscious.
“Yours hips are sore aren’t they? And so is your…”
Tadashi blushed (bless his pure soul), unable to finish his sentence.
“My backside?” Hiro supplemented. Tadashi nodded before he turned to make eye contact with Hiro again.
“Yeah, that. Your backside must be sore too. Did you want to get medication or something? Is that why you’re up?”
Hiro fidgeted a little under Tadashi’s curious gaze. Well, there was no point in trying to hide his problem anymore. Tadashi was clearly awake at this point and clearly knew what Hiro was experiencing. Well, that shouldn’t have been surprising when Hiro thought about it: Tadashi had had sex with other people before, so he must have been familiar with the aftermath of it.
Hiro did need to clarify something though.
“No. I just needed to use the bathroom. But I didn’t anticipate the discomfort and reflexively cried out,” Hiro admitted. “So erm, sorry for waking you up. I didn’t mean to. And sorry for erm, lying.”
Hiro flushed when Tadashi chuckled and gave him a look that just screamed utter fondness.
“That’s ok Hiro. You just wanted me to sleep longer right?”
“I appreciate the effort. But in regards to your problem, how about I carry you to the bathroom then? It should be less stressful on your body.”
Hiro’s eyes sparkled in response.
“Really?” Hiro asked. He would never admit it, but he actually enjoyed having Tadashi carry him around.
“Yes, of course.”
Tadashi got up from the bed; as Tadashi assessed his own steadiness (he didn’t want to drop Hiro after all), Hiro rolled towards the edge of the bed. Tadashi carefully secured his arms underneath Hiro’s back and his legs before he lifted up his small boyfriend. Hiro squeaked softly before he wrapped his arms around Tadashi’s neck.
“Do you feel any pain?” Tadashi asked.
“N-No.” Hiro said, shaking his head.
Tadashi lovingly kissed Hiro’s forehead; in consequence Hiro stubbornly turned away and looked down. But when Hiro realized that looking down meant staring at Tadashi’s junk, he promptly buried his face against Tadashi’s chest.
Tadashi chuckled softly at his boyfriend.
“Why so shy? It’s not a sight you haven’t seen before.” Tadashi teased gently. Hiro groaned into his hands.
“Don’t remind me…”
“Now what’s that supposed to mean?” Tadashi asked, tone playful and affectionate. Hiro couldn’t help but laugh a little nervously.
“Nudity’s still a weird thing to me I guess. Even if it’s you.”
“Mmm that’s understandable,” Tadashi acknowledged, nuzzling Hiro’s forehead. “It’ll get better with time though.”
“Will it really?”
“I think so. But in the meantime, it simply means that we should get dressed as soon as possible.”
Hiro didn’t reply, but his shy, sideways-glance told Tadashi that he agreed. Tadashi chuckled fondly.
“Come on then. Let’s get you to the bathroom and then we can shower.” Tadashi said before he started walking towards Hiro’s bathroom.
Hiro fidgetted in Tadashi’s arms, suddenly hesitant.
“Are you sure? Don’t you want to go back to sleep? If we shower, we can’t sleep on the sheets again until we clean them.”
“Yeah I’m sure. I have you right here in my arms don’t I? Better than any dream, if you ask me. Why would I want to go back to sleep?”
Hiro blew a raspberry against Tadashi’s cheek at that, eliciting a small yelp.
“Stop it. It’s too early in the morning to be gross.” Hiro whined, cheeks rapidly reddening at Tadashi’s words. Tadashi chuckled.
“Sorry, sorry. I’ll stop. Besides, if we’re going to clean your sheets, it’ll probably be best to do it early. We don’t want to be left without dry, useable sheets come night time.”
“Yeah, that is true.”
Tadashi carefully nudged the bathroom door open with his foot; he then lowered Hiro in front of the toilet before he stepped out to give Hiro some privacy. Hiro sighed softly behind the locked door; he was very glad (and grateful) that Tadashi was so accommodating. Hiro relieved himself, flushed the toilet and reopened the door. He was surprised to see Tadashi holding two towels in his hands.
“One of us should start showering.” Tadashi suggested as he hung up the towels. Hiro nodded.
“I’ll shower first…so that I can get some clothes back on.” Hiro said. Tadashi nodded.
“Ok. I’ll brush my teeth in the meantime then.”
Hiro entered the shower and closed the curtains around himself while Tadashi went about brushing his teeth at the sink. After pulling out his shampoo and his bodywash, Hiro turned on the water. The effect of the warm water on Hiro’s sore body was instantaneous; Hiro sighed contently and relaxed his shoulders. After a few seconds of simply enjoying the feel of the water on his skin, Hiro went about washing his hair. He heard Tadashi leave the bathroom for something before coming back in.
“Hey, Tadashi?” Hiro called quietly.
“Yeah? What’s up Hiro?”
“Um...could you help me wash my back?” Hiro asked as he washed the last of his shampoo away. He normally would’ve done it himself but the soreness in his hips and lower body were more limiting than he had thought.
“Ok.” Tadashi said before he gently tugged the shower curtain away.
The shower was a little tight with the two of them in it, but it wasn’t uncomfortable. After Tadashi settled in, Hiro handed him his bottle of bodywash. Tadashi poured some of the liquid out onto his hand and started lathering Hiro’s neck and shoulders. Hiro couldn’t help but giggle softly at Tadashi’s touch.
“That tickles…” Hiro whispered softly. He had to bite down on his bottom lip to stop himself from laughing when Tadashi started scrubbing. Are my nerves just overly sensitive after yesterday? Hiro thought. He usually wasn’t particularly ticklish.
“Mmm...citrus.” Tadashi mused as he scrubbed Hiro’s back. Hiro giggled.
“Yep. With just a hint of lavender.” Hiro replied. He was surprised that Tadashi was commenting on the scent of his bodywash.
“Ah. So this is the scent you seduced me with last night.”
“Pffttt. You noticed? And I guess so.”
Hiro couldn’t see (because he was looking forward), but Tadashi was blushing. Of course Tadashi noticed Hiro’s scent when they had been making love (their bodies had been pressed closely together after all). In fact, he had grown quite fond of it. Focus Tadashi focus Tadashi thought. He’d tell Hiro about it later.
Tadashi scrubbed Hiro’s back for a couple more seconds before he stepped out and let Hiro finish cleaning up. Hiro felt clean enough within 10 minutes; he stepped out, allowing Tadashi to have the shower to himself. Hiro then started drying his hair with one of the towels Tadashi hung up for them.
Hiro jumped slightly at the sound of Tadashi hissing loudly inside the shower.
“Tadashi?” Hiro asked, concerned.
When Tadashi didn’t respond, Hiro pulled the shower curtain aside to check on his boyfriend. Tadashi gave him a sheepish look.
“I think you clawed at my back a little too hard last night…” Tadashi said. Hiro gazed at Tadashi’s back and instantly saw what he meant: there were small streaks of peeled skin and dried blood, especially near the shoulder blades.
“Oh no…I’m so, SO sorry.” Hiro said, blushing. Tadashi chuckled good-naturedly.
“It’s ok. It happens,” Tadashi replied, stepping away from the streaming water to avoid disturbing his skin anymore. “And at least these cuts are easily covered. One time, I had a hickey on my neck that wouldn’t go away for a week! Now that was embarrassing…”
“I-I’ll...be more careful next time.”
Hiro didn’t expect Tadashi to give him a shy look in response to his statement.
“So...there will be a next time?” Tadashi asked, rubbing the back of his neck. Hiro sputtered before pulling the shower curtain back.
“...W-We’ll talk about it after you finish showering…” Hiro said hurriedly. Tadashi burst out laughing and Hiro felt his cheeks burn.
After drying his body, Hiro wrapped the towel around his waist; he felt a sense of relief at finally having something to cover himself with. Hiro then brushed his teeth for about a minute before he left the bathroom. Hiro noticed that Tadashi had laid out some fresh clothes for both of them on a chair near the bed (that must have been why he exited the bathroom earlier); Hiro quickly removed the towel from around his waist, dried his hair a bit more with it, and grabbed one of the shirts off the chair.
Hiro laughed exasperatedly when he noticed how big the shirt was on him; the collar easily dipped past his collarbone and the hem touched his thighs. Had Tadashi given him another one of his shirts again?
“What a nerd.” Hiro whispered to himself. He supposed that the shirt was pretty comfortable though, so he kept it on. Besides, maybe he could use it to tease Tadashi later, which was always fun.
Hiro found himself sighing contently when he finished getting dressed a few seconds later. Who knew that putting clothes on could'be been so...relieving? The awkwardness and shyness that had been buzzing in his head since Tadashi woke up finally faded away. Hm. Hopefully Tadashi is right about my comfort level getting better. I wouldn't want nudity to be something that gets in between us Hiro thought.
With that resolution in mind, Hiro started removing his bed sheets and his summer blanket from the bed; he then tossed them into an empty hamper. Before Hiro went downstairs, he also made sure to grab the towel Tadashi used last night to wipe him clean with off the floor. Hiro didn’t like to admit that he got flustered thinking about how loving and caring Tadashi was post-love making, but he definitely did, if his flushed face was anything to go by. Luckily, Tadashi was still finishing up his shower, so it wasn’t like anyone besides him knew.
After Hiro finished putting everything he needed to in the wash, he made his way into the kitchen to start making breakfast. Hiro toasted some bread before he took out some eggs and bacon from the fridge. Right as he started frying them, he felt Tadashi envelop him in a warm hug from behind. Hiro felt a shiver run through his spine. It wasn’t an unpleasant shiver by any means, but Hiro still couldn't quite understand why these things were happening. He really wasn't normally this sensitive.
“Can I help you?” Hiro asked as Tadashi buried his face in his nest of hair.
“Good morning Hiro.” Tadashi said sweetly before he gently turned Hiro’s face around so that he could kiss him softly on the lips. Hiro was more than happy to return the kiss, but couldn’t help but blinked at his boyfriend in mild confusion.
“...Good morning Tadashi.” Hiro replied, unsure of what else to say. Tadashi chuckled and the rumbles from his chest made Hiro flush slightly.
“Didn’t get a chance to properly say it before. Just thought it’d be polite.”
“And I didn’t want to kiss you earlier because my morning breath is gross.”
“Ah, I didn’t even think of that.” Hiro said. He offered Tadashi a soft smile at the thought.
“Mmm...citrus.” Tadashi mumbled before hugging Hiro closer to him again. Hiro squeaked as he felt Tadashi’s hands snake up his hips and fold together over his heart.
“T-tadashi, I’m trying to cook here…” Hiro muttered. He gasped softly when Tadashi gently kissed his cheek; to his slight chagrin, Hiro felt his knees start getting weak. His body was definitely more sensitive than usual it seemed, making him particularly susceptible to "attack" by Tadashi. This didn't bode well.
“Mmm.” Tadashi hummed noncomitantly before he leaned in to nuzzle and kiss Hiro’s nose.
“Hm.” Hiro grunted, trying to shoo Tadashi away. What was up with him anyway? Tadashi had always been affectionate but he had never been this...clingy. Also, Hiro didn’t particularly like being ignored.
Hiro was so preoccupied with his thoughts that he didn’t notice Tadashi leaning away to kiss the back of his neck; his knees really did end up giving out. Hiro flailed, losing his grip on the pan, which rattled ominously on the stove top.
“TADASHI!” Hiro exclaimed, more from surprise and fear than annoyance.
But Tadashi looked like a kicked puppy in no time at all.
“Sorry...I just...sorry.” Tadashi said before he quickly pulled away from Hiro. Hiro sighed, half-annoyed and half-exasperated. He hadn’t meant to raise his voice at Tadashi; it wasn’t that he did anything wrong or really unpleasant. Hiro just really didn’t want to burn anything.
“Can you please pass me a plate? The food’s done.” Hiro said, voice much more gentle now.
Tadashi handed Hiro a plate; Hiro transfered the cooked food over and turned off the stove. Now that there wasn’t a fire to worry about, he could talk to Tadashi.
“I’m sorry about that,” Hiro said. “But you know how I am with kisses to my neck. I didn’t want to burn the food...or worse, you.”
“No, I’m sorry. I should’ve known better.”
Hiro tilted his head curiously.
“What do you mean?” Hiro asked.
“N-nothing. Please, don’t worry about it.” Tadashi said, waving his hands in front of him. Hiro giggled quietly at Tadashi’s reddening ears. It was obvious that Tadashi was embarrassed about something .
But if Tadashi didn’t want to tell him right now, Hiro wasn’t going to push it. He’d probably find out soon enough.
The two made their way to Hiro’s dining table to eat breakfast. To his great annoyance, Hiro stiffened from pain the moment he sat down. Then again, maybe squirming his way down (and quickly at that) wasn’t the smartest idea for his sore behind right about now. But as they say, old habits die hard*.
“Hiro?” Tadashi asked, clearly concerned.
“Mmm…” Hiro groaned uncomfortably before he sprung back up. Hiro tried sitting down again (much more slowly this time) but still found it slightly painful to sit down.
There was a brief pause before Tadashi patted his lap.
“C’mere. It should be easier on you if I help support your weight.”
Hiro had a brief mental-battle with himself before he moved towards Tadashi. Hiro felt himself flushing as he eased himself into Tadashi’s lap.
“Better?” Tadashi asked gently. Hiro nodded.
“I guess...a little.”
“You’re probably going to be sore all day today…” Tadashi said, tone sad, as he rubbed Hiro’s hands in his own. The kicked puppy look was back; Hiro had to resist the urge to bop his boyfriend gently on the nose for worrying about something that was probably inevitable.
“That’s fine. We don’t have anything planned for today anyway.” Hiro said, shrugging. Tadashi gaped at Hiro’s nonchalance.
“Wow. I thought...I thought you would’ve been upset.”
“To be honest, I’m more upset about the fact that you’re probably thinking how you weren’t careful enough with prepping me. Which, you spent more than enough time doing.”
“But I-” Tadashi started before Hiro gently cut him off.
“I’ll be fine . My muscles just weren’t used to it, that’s all. It’ll get better with time and more practice.” Hiro said. He then leaned forward and kissed Tadashi quickly on the lips to prevent any further retorts he may have had.
Hiro ate his breakfast quietly in peace for all of 10 seconds before he felt Tadashi move nervously behind (and beneath) him. Hiro turned around to face Tadashi and raised his eyebrow, silently asking for an explanation. Tadashi’s ears reddened.
“Sorry.” Tadashi said instinctively. Hiro shrugged dismissively.
“Um, I…I...gosh I can’t even speak because there are so many butterflies in my stomach right now.”
“Why? It’s not like we’re meeting for the first time or something Tadashi. It’s just me, remember?”
Tadashi gave Hiro a bashful look that implied he thought otherwise. Hiro gently shook his head in confusion.
“What, am I suddenly a new person now that we had sex together?” Hiro asked, rather bluntly. Tadashi coughed.
“I...do see you in a different light actually,” Tadashi said softly, blushing all the while. “You really took on a lot last night, even if I did prep you with lots of lube and stretching. Also, you still have to deal with pain and discomfort today. I think your tenacity is incredible.”
Hiro felt himself blushing furiously in no time at all. He gently smacked Tadashi’s shoulder.
“You sound like a husband looking at his wife for the first time after she gives birth or something,” Hiro muttered, making Tadashi laugh fondly. “Which makes no sense because I’m neither a wife nor pregnant...Ugh why do you say such embarrassing things? Honestly. ”
“I knew you’d say that...hence why I was sorry before. For you know, having such embarrassing thoughts.”
Hiro rolled his eyes, but in his heart, he sincerely appreciated Tadashi’s...adoration of him. It was nice, knowing that Tadashi thought so highly of him. Even if it was over something kind of...silly.
“But you saying ‘pain and discomfort’ reminds me. I still need to clean out the cuts on your back.”
“I still can’t believe I clawed at you hard enough to tear skin.” Hiro said. It was his turn to look embarrassed.
“It happens.” Tadashi said softly. He nuzzled Hiro’s neck, which made Hiro burst out into giggles.
“Well, hopefully it won’t happen next time.” Hiro said.
Hiro leaned in to peck Tadashi on the lips.
“And yes, there will be a next time.” Hiro whispered softly, anticipating Tadashi’s question, which he had deflected before. Tadashi smiled tenderly. Hiro couldn’t have known, but Tadashi was genuinely worried that making love would cause an awkward rift to form between them; it had happened to him in the past after all. Luckily, that didn’t seem like the case now.
“Thank you Hiro…”
“Of course. I love you silly. I’m not about to let you go, sheesh.” Hiro said, smiling.
Tadashi felt his heart simply melt at Hiro’s words. He nuzzled Hiro’s neck again before he kissed Hiro’s forehead and his cheeks. When Hiro gave him a small nod, Tadashi leaned in to kiss Hiro on the lips.
When they broke apart, Hiro’s smile turned mischievous.
“I wonder what I can do to make you lose control next time…” Hiro whispered huskily. Tadashi’s cheeks promptly flushed a bright red.
“Wha?” Tadashi replied, quite intelligently really.
“Hm. Maybe I can take all of you inside of me.”
Hiro burst out laughing while Tadashi hid his face in his hands.
“It probably won’t be for awhile though. I have to be realistic after all.” Hiro said nonchalantly, as if he was simply talking about the weather and not dirty, dirty things. Tadashi buried his face in Hiro’s nest of hair.
“You’re unbelievable…” Tadashi groaned, sounding legitimately miserable. Hiro giggled as he gently nudged Tadashi with his head.
“If you didn’t have such cute and funny reactions, I wouldn’t tease you so much.” Hiro joked. Tadashi couldn’t help but chuckle a little.
“Oh, so it’s my fault now?”
“Yes, that’s what I said. And besides, you should know that better than anyone! You tease me all the time with your embarrassing romantic shenanigans!”
“Well I never! I’m going to stop talking now.” Tadashi said with a huff.
Hiro shrugged carelessly; in fact, he promptly took the opportunity to snag a piece of bacon with his fork and hold it to Tadashi’s mouth. If Tadashi wasn’t going to talk, he might as well eat.
“Come on. The sooner we finish breakfast, the sooner I can clean your cuts,” Hiro said softly, his teasing tone gone. “And the sooner I finish that, the sooner we can go cuddle on the couch. I think that’ll be nice, don’t you?”
Tadashi didn’t need to be told twice; the two finished breakfast pretty quickly after that. Hiro then proceeded to clean out Tadashi’s cuts and place cute Hello-Kitty band-aids on top; he snapped a few pictures on his phone so he could show Tadashi later. After cleaning everything up, the two made their way into Hiro’s garage. Tadashi laid down on the couch first while Hiro turned on the fan. Hiro then carefully crawled into the empty space in front of Tadashi; Tadashi draped his right arm over Hiro’s smaller frame and buried his face against Hiro’s neck.
“Comfortable?” Hiro asked Tadashi.
“Mmm.” Tadashi hummed contently. Hiro chuckled.
“Care to tell me why you seem adamant on making my neck your place of permanent residence?” Hiro jokingly asked. Tadashi huffed in response.
“Because it’s a nice place to live. Obviously.” Tadashi mumbled. Hiro laughed.
“Is it...bothering you?”
Hiro was no expert on emotions, but even he could tell how carefully he needed to answer Tadashi’s question. Tadashi was sincerely asking and it was a very shy and self-conscious question. Hiro smiled softly before he reached for Tadashi’s hand and intertwined their fingers.
“Of course not. I just wanted to know the reason why you want to stay so close to me,” Hiro explained slowly, carefully formulating his thought. “And...reassure you, if necessary, that I don’t mind it. Not at all.”
Tadashi sighed softly against Hiro’s neck. It was a soft sigh of relief.
“Thank you Hiro,” Tadashi whispered (Hiro felt himself get flustered by how grateful Tadashi sounded). “I guess I get kind of clingy post-love making. I really haven’t figured out why.”
Hiro mulled over Tadashi’s words. It helped keep his mind off how embarrassingly adorable Tadashi was being right about now.
“Hmm. Maybe you just need some emotional intimacy? I mean, that’s not to say we didn’t share any last night but…there was a lot of physicality involved too. It might have overshadowed the emotional intimacy a little bit.”
“But this is nice. Just cuddling and having a heart-to-heart talk? It’s...warm and comfy.”
Hiro was careful not to accidentally bop Tadashi’s nose when he turned around to face his boyfriend. Hiro stared into Tadashi’s eyes and couldn’t help but giggle happily at the sight. Tadashi’s eyes were so full of warmth and affection.
“You’re so cute.” Hiro whispered fondly. Tadashi chuckled shyly.
“Oh please. That’s my line…”
The two gazed at each other for a few seconds before Hiro leaned in and nuzzled Tadashi’s nose; Tadashi happily nuzzled back. Hiro then leaned in and kissed Tadashi on the lips, eyes fluttering closed as he did so. He was surprised (pleasantly so) when Tadashi deepened the kiss, almost immediately.
After they separated, Hiro shifted his body so that Tadashi’s head rested against his chest; Hiro nuzzled his face against Tadashi’s hair and wrapped his arms around Tadashi’s neck. Tadashi stiffened (from surprise) before he relaxed and breathed out a soft, very content sigh against Hiro’s shirt.
“Comfortable?” Hiro asked again.
“Yes. Very.” Tadashi whispered back.
Hiro could feel his boyfriend’s smile against his heart; try as he might, Hiro couldn’t help but blush a little. Man the things I do for this guy Hiro thought.
“Your heart rate’s quickening.” Tadashi said, matter-of-factly.
“Oh shush. Don’t make me think that doing this was a mistake.” Hiro muttered. Tadashi giggled. Hiro was just so adorable when he was embarrassed.
“I love you Hiro.”
Hiro was just about to move away from Tadashi when Tadashi kissed Hiro, right on his heart. Hiro let out a yelp.
“Y-You didn’t hear that.” Hiro muttered.
“Ah!” Tadashi parroted, much to Hiro’s annoyance.
“Are you mocking me?”
Tadashi had the nerve to chuckle . Fine, two can play at this game Hiro thought.
Hiro moved his arms away from Tadashi’s neck and slowly weaved his fingers into Tadashi’s hair. Hiro alternated between softly combing Tadashi’s hair and massaging his scalp; within minutes, Tadashi was humming happily away and leaning up into Hiro’s hands. Hiro had no doubt that if Tadashi had a tail, it’d be wagging full force right about now.
Hiro paused his ministrations for a few seconds, just to see how Tadashi would react. He was rewarded with a low, pitiful whine.
“Awww~.” Hiro cooed before he resumed his petting. Tadashi once again started humming quietly, the vibrations making Hiro’s nerves tingle pleasantly.
“I’m so happy...you loveee me.” Tadashi mumbled into Hiro’s shirt. Hiro scoffed and paused his ministrations.
“I’m your boyfriend. ” Hiro retorted.
“And to this day, I’m still amazed that you are.”
“Hey. Remember, go easy on that self-deprecating behavior mister.”
“Heh. Yes, yes.”
The two lay together, a comfortable silence falling between them; Hiro restarted petting Tadashi’s head and stroking his hair. At some point, Hiro noticed that Tadashi felt a little heavy against him; it seemed that Tadashi had dozed off. Hiro laughed fondly to himself. So cute Hiro thought.
Hiro didn’t know what possessed him to do it, but he left soft kisses all over Tadashi’s face, starting from his right cheek up to his forehead. After that, Hiro started humming quietly to himself, all the while holding Tadashi as close to him as comfortably possible. He should have felt embarrassed about his gross behavior at the moment, but seeing as how Tadashi wasn’t fully awake, Hiro wasn’t too concerned.
Besides, holding Tadashi close to him just felt...right. A feeling of warmth, completely unrelated to the weather or their close proximity to one another, filled Hiro’s chest.
Hiro smiled to himself before he closed his eyes and allowed himself to doze off as well.
*If you've ever watched BH6 Behind-the-scenes, you'll know about the "sitting down in the cafe" test they did for all the characters to gauge how the characters would act and whatnot. The way Hiro sits down on his seat is wiggling his butt in lolol. I imagine if he did such a thing after having anal sex for the first time, he's going to feel some discomfort lol.
Ahahahaaa this was so embarrassing to write hahahaa /blushes For a very different reason in comparison to writing the actual smut.
The reason? Because I personally have no experience with the morning-after. And I feel like it's not something really written about in fanfiction, so I didn't have much personal reference or actual reference to base this chapter off of. :/ So I tried my best simply using my imagination and logic lolollll;;; orz. Hopefully it's not too weird or unrealistic. I imagine soreness and discomfort are common things that happen; after all, you strained muscles and parts of your body in ways you never did before. Also, I imagine that having meaningful and honest conversation is super super important; hopefully, Hiro and Tadashi have said enough to be on the same page~
On a random note, I've had the idea of Hiro scratching Tadashi's back enough to bleed/hurt for literally THE LONGEST time hahaaaa. Hence, why I made sure I wrote about it in the previous chapter. I double and tripled checked and everything xDDD I'm so weird idk why I bothered including this small insignificant detail orz Maybe it'll actually be important later on...
Lastly I hope it's not too weird that they woke up, had breakfast and did some chores and literally went back to sleep lolol. Quite honestly, I've been so tired lately from studying and work, that on my days off, that's what I find myself doing quite often. xDD. I'd wake up at like 9, have breakfast at 10, then doze off in bed again by 11. No joke hahaaaaa orzzz The post-breakfast nap is too good to miss... TvT
The next chapter should be really short, because all I have left planned for this particular installment is to create a segue to the next. What will the next installment be like? Really cute stuff, if things go according to plan :)) Hopefully I can make it up to you guys with a good installment after such a long absence TvT;;;
Once again, come find me on Rl4r.tumblr.com!!! I’m always lurking around (cuz I have no lifeeeeeee *punted*) and I’d love to hear what you guys thinks. Thank you in advance!