"I don't have the accounts, they've been eaten by a dinosaur."
Lynda sighed. As excuses went it didn't even qualify as outrageous in comparison to others she'd heard. Even including the time when he claimed they'd been exterminated by Daleks. In order to loom over him, she stepped closer to his desk and leaned over it. His fixed smile didn't falter. "Colin, there are no dinosaurs in Norbridge. There haven't been dinosaurs anywhere on the planet for the last 65 million years."
"Except these." He held up a toy Tyrannosaurus Rex.
She gave him a look. "It's not alive, Colin. It can't eat anything."
"Well, no, ordinarily they don't. But there was a reason they were so cheap." He reached for the books, which did have pages that look like they'd been chewed. Colin must have spent ages ripping them up. "Look." He opened the top folder, flicked a switch on the underside of the dinosaur and put it down on top of the page. It whirred and gnashed its teeth. Then bobbed its head to make a mess of whatever it could get its teeth on. The accounts in this case.
"Perfect homework excuse," Colin said, beaming. "Yours for only £10."
Lynda stood up straight and folded her arms.
"All right, £11. And only because we're such good friends."
"Get the dinosaur away from the accounts." Lynda turned to go, but as she put her hand on the door handle, she looked back over her shoulder. "And I expect you to re-write the books and have them on my desk after school tomorrow."