The carriage was jolting on the cobble road,and the Carbury’s house quickly disappeared in the distance so as the young man’s hopes who was on his way to the dock. He was a freshly graduated engineer, with surpassing creativity and irrefutable persistence. His ambitions were broken down quite soon, as he accepted a position what he never should have , but he was trying hard to erase it from his memories and start to build his future.
The dock was crowded and even dirtier from the usual, due to the mud which was caused by the rain. The carriage immediately moved on as its passenger stepped out of it, splashing up mud on his trousers. The young man just sighed then walked up towards the ticket seller, to buy his boat ticket to Mexico. Luck really stayed far away from him, he had to realize that, when the seller told him that the ship which was meant to go to Mexico has burnt down in the evening under unfortunate circumstances. He leaned against the wall and looked down, then the old seller told him that there’ll be a ship which would go to America in the next morning, or if he would wait two more days there’ll be one to Mexico. Paul covered his face and sighed deeply then glanced up and looked at a huge taunt masted ship, where all the passengers were going.
"And where’s that ship going?"
"Oh sir, that one’s going to Australia, surely a long voyage."
"One ticket then to Australia."
"Sir, the ship is about to depart. I don’t think there's any place for you there, you know the weight limits."
"Look, I have only a hand luggage, and I have to get on that ship. I’m a graduated engineer, and I have some serious businesses."
"Very well sir."
With big steps he quickly reached the enormous ship before it sailed out from the dock. A young servant boy stepped to him to take his luggage but he just shook his head. The guy lead him to his cabin which was under the bridge. He tossed his handbag into his narrow cabin then leaned against a pillar front of it. The idea to come to Australia, was a quick decision, he was too tired to wait, and he had nowhere to go, he couldn't go back. He wanted to leave London and England behind him as soon as he could. He thought a little new adventure to Australia won’t harm him, and if he would still think so, from Australia he could easily travel up to Mexico, but he wasn't sure about this business a hundred per cent, once he’s been deceived, he was afraid of it that it was about to happen again. Then his thoughts were interrupted by a young gentleman’s complains which he said loud enough to be heard. Then with a thudding noise the gentleman bumped his head into the roof of the place as it was rather low and the male was noticeably tall.
"Are you alright sir?"
"I’m fine, arghh just wish we’d be in Australia as soon as possible. The state of this ship is revolting, not to mention those tiny holes which they call cabins, absolute nonsense."
"To be in Australia? Our ship hasn't even departed yet." Paul chuckled slightly, and thought this man must have been from really high society rank, the way he was speaking, his voice tone, his fancy clothes.
"I honestly hope that the commander of this vessel will take care of everything well enough, it’s the least, if he can’t do anything about the state of it." He rubbed his forehead where he hit it then slightly bowed as he reached his arm out for a handshake. "I’m Edmund Talbot....my first ship voyage..to be honest." At the end he forced a wide smile.
"A pleasure to meet you Sir Talbot." He shook his hand with a smile. "My name is Paul Montague...And don’t worry sir about the voyage, I've been on several ships so far, well I've never taken this trip but I’m sure it’ll be just like the others."
"Pleasure to meet you too Sir Montague. Thank you for your comforting words, but it still worries me especially because this ship looks like it’s about to fall into pieces or about to sink in any moment."
"It’ll be better as soon as we depart, believe me."
"I hope so, I hope so. I warmly advise, as I’ll write down everything in my journal and then I’ll send it to my godfather, he’s an influential man. In fact he’s the reason why I’m travelling to Australia. I’m about to take up a post in the Governor of New South Wales." He smirked confidently. "And what are your reasons that you decided to come to Australia?"
"The reason is quite simple and not planned at all..." Paul ran his eyes on the other, and wasn't sure he liked Sir Talbot’s posh style, as he himself was rather a simple and middle class man. " ...I have a business in Mexico, but the ship which was meant to sail there was burnt down, so I rather decided to travel with this one, unless if I wanted to wait one or two days for the proper ships." He looked away not so the other wouldn't see the sadness in his eyes. "I have to leave England, I couldn't stay any longer." He glanced up and noticed the doubt in Sir Talbot’s eyes, that maybe he’s been thinking he’s into some deep trouble, that maybe the police is after him, so after a little pause he added. "Bad memories sir, broken heart, deceivers, lost love...I have to leave all these behind."
"For a second I was about to conjecture that you’re under warrant of caption. What a relief, but these days people can never know, all these scandals what’s gathering around some people, how embarrassing. Well me myself is absolutely clean and irreproachable, a member of the aristocracy." He was smiling and standing there so confident and self satisfied, that Paul thought Sir Talbot will faint from his own perfection.
"Well that’s a relief too sir." He rolled his eyes discretely and sighed. "If you’ll excuse me" Then he pushed the tone sharper. "...my lord, but I have to unpack my luggage."
Paul shut his cabin’s door and thought that what a posh, arrogant and annoying guy was that Talbot. He tossed his bag down the floor and snuggled down into his bed, he wanted to keep his emotions inside, tried to hold back his tears, but he couldn't, so many things happened to him, the tears broke out and started to cover his cheek all over. He pressed his trembling hand against his mouth and was sobbing quietly. He was burying his face into the pillow, when someone knocked, he asked on his thin and trembled voice, that who was it, and it was Sir Talbot. Paul got up from his bed and wiped his tears into his shirt's sleeve then opened up his door.
"Sorry if it’s inconvenient, I won’t bother you long Sir Montague, I was wondering whether you’d like to join me for a conversation meanwhile taking a walk on the board. We could see our ship departing out into the wide ocean." Paul felt like if he tried to speak he’ll cry again, he looked down and whispered softly.
"Thank you that you thought about me, I’ll gladly join..." His voice trembled and some more tears ran down on his face but he tried to hide them.
"Sir Montague...are you alright? Is something wrong?" Paul didn't answer just covered his face, he was so young and still so many unfair and bad things has happened to him, he felt like he can’t fight with these feelings. "I’m sorry..if I said something..." Edmund hesitated little then reached out his hand and rubbed Paul’s back softly.
"..thank you...I’m sorry I don’t meant to break out like this, but my life took a miserable turn lately. I really don’t want to bother you sir with my problems."
"Don’t be silly Sir Montegue, we’ll be neighbours till months, it’s the least we can do to listen to each other and talk, or you planned these months to spend it all the way to Australia locked up in your cabin?" Edmund snickered slightly.
"No..I suppose not..." Paul forced a smile and wiped away his tears then leaned against his door and looked up at Sir Talbot. "I don’t really wish to remember what has happened to me, it still causes me deep pain, so if you don’t mind sir, I won't tell them with great details...As I've already mentioned, I’m an engineer. I had an American friend..well I thought he was my friend, I rather say now just colleague. I had this plan to build a transcontinental railway in Mexico, and we went back to London to find someone who’ll support us financially. We went to a man called Melmotte, he was eager to support us and we invested money too. It all sounded rather like a dream, but I’m also good at financial matters and it shortly became evident for me that something wasn't going well, so after I couldn't discuss it properly with Mr. Melmotte, I traveled out to Mexico to see how the railway constructions are going." He chuckled up with sadness and anger. "What a fool I was...there was nothing, he deceived me, so as my colleague, I used my own money to start the constructions, but it was enough for nothing. Then I broke up the business with Mr. Melmotte who was nothing but a devious fraud."
"How unbelievably horrible events, accept my condolence about it Sir Montague. I hope this muck of the society is behind bars by now."
"Well I don’t know about that, but I hope so. But it happened that my love life has taken an unfortunate turn too. I had a fiancee from America, she’s a widow, and I ended up my relationship with her. Lately I met a girl, Hetta....Hetta Carbury...we fell in love with each other for the first time, and I was about to ask her to marry me. Then my ex fiancee came to me and literally was terrorizing me, to take her out to dinner and provide her company, or else she won’t break up our engagement. So I obeyed meanwhile Hetta found out about us. I explained her everything, but guess it was too late, and I shouldn't have lied to her, but now it’s all too late. She’s marrying someone else, and probably that’ll be a better future for her.
"I actually can’t find the words. I feel like now I haven’t lived really at all. You've been through so many things, it’s remarkable...although rather sad, I’m sorry about it."
"Oh there’s nothing really to sorry now, what happened, happened. Only thing I can do now is to forget and move on...thank you for listening to me, it helped, to tell you, Sir Talbot."
"You’re very welcome, and call me Edmund. Anytime you want to talk just knock on the wall or door." He giggled and smiled at him.
"I will, thank you, and you can call me Paul...oh at last we’re departing." Paul smiled and grabbed onto the door tighter as the rain, also thunder has broken out again, because of all of this the ship started to wobble intensively.
"I think I rather go back to my cabin now, I just feel little dizzy."
Paul nodded and he walked back into his cabin too. His opinion about Edmund has changed completely. Of course he had a posh little annoying style, but he was a nice man in fact, and the way he comforted Paul it was a positive point for him. The ship made loud creaky noises and the thunder just became stronger. As Paul was sitting on his bed he heard that Edmund became sea sick, he glanced at his watch later and became little worried, so he walked over to Edmund’s cabin and knocked on it. Edmund’s face was white as sheet and sweat drops were running down on his face. He had cracked lips, Paul quickly poured water into a glass and leaned down to him to give him some, but nothing stayed in him. Edmund immediately started retching but didn't have the strength to sit up. Paul grabbed up the chamberpot and lifted up Edmund as he held him by his forehead, while he was throwing up. The following two weeks were passing quite the same. Paul stayed most of the time at Edmund’s cabin to make sure he won’t run dry. After two weeks the thunder stopped and the ship finally was sailing on the water calmly. Edmund started recovering from his sea sickness.
One day when Paul was leaning against the boat’s side and was lost in the seemingly endless view, Edmund appeared next to him and smiled.
"Edmund! I’m so happy you feel better now."
"Oh you have no idea how happy I am. I've been struggling so much, those two weeks were like I was damned to the deepest pit of hell, but I survived thanks to you. What you did Paul that was unlike what anyone else would have done. People do not care for each other when you’re in trouble or in this case if you’re sick. I’m grateful to you, my friend."
"Yes maybe other people are like that, but not me. I’d do it again, you’re my friend too." Paul smiled softly at him then glanced back at the ocean. "Well there’s not much to look at, but at least the sun is shining."
"It depends what view we’re talking about." Edmund licked his lips and was staring at a passenger woman who was older than them at least with ten years."
"Ahm...I see you’re fully recovered by now."
"It’s not forbidden to look at her."
"No..it’s not forbidden to look at her." Paul said to himself as he was lying in his bed and heard from the next room how Edmund was 'just looking' at that woman. Paul tried to work on some delineations, but in this noise he couldn't. "Can you please do it little less louder?" But it was useless Zenobia was screaming so loudly and Edmund was pushing her against the wall with loud thudding noises. Paul sighed and placed the pillow on his ear tightly. After few minutes he didn't hear anything and little later Edmund knocked and walked into his cabin. He sat down at the edge of his bed and was snickering with shut mouth.
"I assume you and lady Zenobia spent pleasurable times together."
"Ahahhah...it was rather enjoyable, yes. But silly pathetic woman thought I’ll want to see her again, and maybe a more serious relationship. This just made me to laugh, oh well and she left, or should I say I shut the door in her face." He giggled as his face was still red and had some drip of sweats on his cheek and neck.
"This was not right Edmund." Paul sat up and tossed the papers away from his lap. "Even if she’s flirting and playing with everyone on this ship. You can’t be that rude and turn a cold shoulder to her, after all you made love to her, that’s rather an intimate part in two persons’ life."
"Paul, we were just having a little fun. You can’t be serious when you say I have to actually respect a woman like Zenobia, she’s way below my rank, and she’s acting like a prostitute, then what else was she expecting from me? I’m not a muggins."
"Alright, alright, I’m not about to interfere into your love life. Just next time try not to tear apart the cabin with such loud noises." Edmund nodded then left as he was still snickering."
They were now far away from England as two months passed, Edmund and Paul were talking everyday and got to know each other completely. One night they held a little celebration on the ship, everyone was down in the dining room. It became obvious for Paul that Edmund couldn't stand alcohol, he became quite drunk after just few glasses. This night he drank even more than usual so Paul lifted him up and walked back to take him to his cabin. He laid him down in his bed and stood up, but Edmund told him to stay. So Paul turned back and sat down beside his bed. Edmund clanged onto his arm and pulled himself up so he could sit up.
"Paul, you are really the best, the best friend I could ever wish for."
"Thank you Edmund, you’re my best friend too."
"I..just..one thing I...what is not clear...how could that girl..Hetty..Hetta? How could she not come back to you. I mean..." He hiccuped and rubbed his eyes. "You’re intelligent, a great conversational partner, funny, kind...oh and of course your look..but you know that..."
"No, I don’t know, what about my look Edmund?" Paul raised up his eyebrow and looked at Edmund.
"You’re very very very handsome...your long black curls...and and and your blue..ocean blue eyes...and...your full lips...ahahaha this sounded rather...ah rather..." But he couldn't finish as Paul pressed his lips on his, then backed of slightly. "...hmm now that’s that’s...."
"Weird? I’m sorry Edmund..I..."
Before Paul could have continued, Edmund grabbed his shirt and pulled him close to him, kissed him now deeply with a moan. Paul started to unbutton his shirt and tossed it down on the floor, then he leaned in to take off Edmund’s shirt too. He gently pushed Edmund back on his bed and crawled to him. Paul was giving soft kisses all over Edmund’s soft skin on his chest. His tongue was licking Edmund’s pure neck slowly and softly touched his teeth against it too. Meanwhile Edmund unzipped their trousers, and Paul helped him to remove them all. As Paul ran his eyes on Edmund’s slim body, his member became harder. Edmund was moaning loudly as Paul was sucking his neck and was rubbing his member against his. Their body were both burning with desire for each other. Edmund ran his hands through Paul’s long curls and pulled him closer to him for a deep kiss, so he could taste him. Paul placed his hand on his erected member and started to rub it against Edmund’s butt, then gave a thrust and penetrated into Edmund. He bit into his lips and hugged Paul tightly to himself. Paul was thrusting his member inside him with intense movement, while he was rubbing and pulling his fingers around Edmund’s member, who was whimpering under him. Paul slid his arms tightly around him and grabbed his shoulder and started pushing himself even deeper into Edmund, then he shut his eyes and with a low slight moan came inside him. Edmund was moving little as Paul was wanking him off, then he clanged onto Paul and came as well while he was whimpering loudly, some tears left his eyes. Both of their bodies were shivering and were gasping for air. Paul shifted behind him and tucked themselves in, Paul cuddled up to him tightly. Edmund fell asleep shortly because of the lots of alcohol and also because of what happened after. Paul stayed up for a while and was fondling Edmund’s slim arm gently.
In the morning they were still in each other’s arms, they woke up around the same time. Paul smiled softly at him and pressed a kiss on his cheek, but Edmund’s reaction was way different, he quickly got out from the bed and started dressing up.
"Arghh God...what’s wrong? Can’t you see what’s wrong?! What we did...that was not right...that was ahhh Jesus, we shouldn't have done it."
"Oh I see so it’s right to fuck some whore among the passengers, but with me it’s not. What was not right about it?! Didn't you like it or what’s wrong?"
"I enjoyed it, but Christ, Paul! You can’t think...you seriously can’t think it was right. We should never do it ever again. I’m an heir of a wealthy and influential family, and a scandal like this. Oh God, it can’t happen again, and we should not talk about this to anyone. My parents would kill me or what’s worse they’d dispossess me from all the money, and I’d be poor..." Paul put on his underwear and stood up.
"If that’s what you exactly think about it, then why didn't you stop me yesterday night? Why didn't you?" His voice was sharp and the pain was noticeable in it. "I told you I’m sorry, but you kissed me back then. Why did you do it if this is what you think?! Because you haven’t made up this opinion about it right now! Or was it just a good pleasure for you to ease your lust for one night? Oh I guess now it’s the part when you’ll smash the door in my face and laugh at me, isn't it? Well thank you I can find myself out on my own!"
Paul grabbed up his clothes and shut the door behind himself then locked himself into his cabin, he heard how Edmund was sobbing in his room, but he didn't care about it, even when he was knocking. Paul spent the rest of the months without saying a word to Edmund and tried to avoid any meeting with him. He took that night seriously and thought Edmund did too, but he wasn't. Paul felt so hurt, especially because of his past too. Paul at the beginning almost hated Edmund, because he was so arrogant and annoying, but by the time he got used to his style, and found out that Edmund was a really sweet guy. When Edmund had sex with Zenobia he told himself he felt sorry about that woman and that’s why it bothered him, but that was a different feeling, jealousy, jealousy for Edmund. It was as if he has fallen in love with him without even knowing about it, but he tried to suppress the feeling inside him. But on that night when Edmund told those words to him, he couldn't handle it anymore. He was so attracted to Edmund’s soft angel face, those beautiful eyes with the mixture of green and blue, his beautifully curved lips and his everything. But during the rest of the months, Paul was about to delete these feelings inside him. On the day they arrived to Australia the young servant boy handled a letter to Paul, he slipped it inside his pocket and left the ship quickly to avoid the meeting with Edmund. He took a carriage to the train station which went to another dock where the ships were going to the way of America. On the way to the train station Paul tried to distract his attention from Edmund so he started to think about the plans of the railway. As the carriage arrived, Paul straightened his black waistcoat and stepped down. He bought his ticket and was walking up and down on the platform waiting for his train. After few minutes it arrived, and Paul walked up and sat down on his seat, then he felt something was rustling in his pocket and then he remembered he got a letter. He slid his hand inside it, then opened, which included the following: ’Would you take me to Mexico with you? - Edmund’.
Edmund was sitting in the garden of his apartment on a bench and with a numb look was looking staring of himself. He thought he wasn't an adult, he was so rude and played with serious emotions all the way, but now he understood them all. He didn't expect from Paul that he’d come back. He was wondering whether he should have written him a long apologizing letter, but he thought this will be good too, the goal with them anyway would be the same. He buried his face in his hands and sighed deeply.
"Where are your luggage?"
"P..Paul?" Edmund turned around and quickly jumped up from the bench and ran up to Paul before he hugged him tightly. "I thought you’ll never come back to me."
"Yeah...I was considering it myself though..." Paul rolled his eyes then pressed a kiss on his cheek. "So where are your luggage? We can still catch another train."
"So you’re really taking me with you?"
"Otherwise I wouldn't have jumped down from a moving train, after I read this." He raised up the letter and smiled.-
"Paul...I...yes I love you..."
"And you mean it? You really mean it Edmund?"
"I mean it, this is the first thing I’m sure about in my life....so what are we waiting for, let’s go to Mexico."