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From Afar

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From Afar

Padmé Amidala is lovely in the way she walks, the words she speaks are heaven laced and her brown eyes… She’s the thing of fairytales and she’s a warrior Queen, defending her people till her last breath.

Blue-grey eyes trace over her skin, the curve of her mouth, those curved lines of her hips.

And Obi-Wan Kenobi wants her. Wants her so much more than he should.

This want is a fire, simmering inside. He can’t stop looking at her, reaching out for her, searching every room he’s in for her form.

His eyes follow her everywhere she goes. To hear her name sends a smile upon his lips.

He shakes her hand and he’s thrown back to that day on the Queen’s ship, flying back to Naboo to face the Trade Federation. Seeing that small slip of a girl, sitting alone in the dark. Seeing her reaching out a hand for him to come to her. Feeling her break down in his arms; sobbing in her fear for her people. And then those small hands, reaching up to touch his face, sliding over the soft skin of his jaw. Those soft lips of hers lightly pressing against his and her whisper of “thank you.” The way she whispered her goodnight to him, a gleam in her eyes as she left him behind.

And years later, in his mind he can still see her, after the battle and revealed to be the true Nubian Queen. A vision in white, her face smiling up at him, those eyes wise and strong and yet so joyful at her people’s liberation. The way her hand slid over his, curling around it, pressing her fingers tight into his skin. “Thank you, Obi-Wan”, she had said, her voice soft, “you will never be forgotten.”

She had been so brave and young. A thrilling mystery that he somehow always understood even when no one else did.

He’d traced a tear-stained face on that Nubian ship and read the lines on her skin. He tasted wetness on her lips and felt inside of him something bloom. Seen the stars in her brown eyes and for once didn’t fear the sky. He saw into her and found the other half of himself that he had been missing.

There’s loneliness inside of her, a well of sadness inside her veins. Obi-Wan sees the weight of it drag her down time and time again. Watches as she drowns in herself. Watches from the shadows as everyone else is blind. He sees that loneliness because he understands it. He feels it and recognizes it from the infinite sadness inside of himself.

He never knew what made him this way. What made this sadness linger in him, even in his happiest moments. But he knew, when he met her, all those years ago, that she understood. She felt that hollowness in her bones as he did. 

And he also knew that she would be the only one for him. This woman with sad brown eyes and a bittersweet smile. Even if he never touched her like a lover, never had her take his name, bare his child… she would always be with him, inside his mind, in his veins. 

Some days it’s enough. Just knowing that there’s someone else like him out there. Knowing that she exists and that she’s fighting the same fight as him. Imagining that someday they’ll be in the same room again.

But other days, he spends hours staring out the window, thinking what he should have, what he needs to be real. He plans the whole thing out; running to her, barging though every barrier to meet her, seeing the surprise and that hope in her eyes, pulling her towards him and claiming those lips with his.

He knows that there will be tears as they give in, as she falls into his body, two rivers meeting. Her body will be surprisingly soft, those hands delicate despite the calluses on them as they reach up and tangle in his hair. And the way she sighs his name so softly…

And then, after that kiss, he sees their life played out before him. A small wedding on Naboo, with just her most intimate family and a few of his friends in attendance, watching as they exchanged vows to be always there for each other, till the very end. Staying there in the country, living a simple life. Children born with those eyes of hers, her smile gracing their faces. Waking up to her body next to his every morning, those hands cupping his face.

Night after night he dreams of those eyes, their sadness long forgotten and shining bright as they loved him, as they looked down at their children with a mother’s pure glee.

But then he’s brought back to reality, by a friend, by the war, by Anakin… and he pushes those dreams back to where they belong, hidden inside. And he goes on with his life, the way a Jedi should.

But she always lingers within him. Her presence is a light, whose tendrils that have woven around him, refusing to let him free.

It would be easier, so much easier, he thinks, if she hated him. If she thought that the sight of him were insignificant and never imagined what his hands would feel like against her skin, never wondered and wished. But she doesn’t.

He knows her and he knows that she dreams too. Those eyes have seen the future as he has.

He may deny his feelings breath but he can’t deny that he feels those brown eyes, always following him as he walks away.

Loving from afar.

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AN: So how was that? That seem to fit obidala? Please help me. I want to understand them better so I can write more for them.