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Tango To The Tune Of TMI

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Sweet Jesus!”


There was a loud slamming of a door, followed by various noises of distress as Miles exited the employees only area in the back, grinding his fists into his eyeballs.


“Dear God, my eyes! Why the hell would they even... Goddammit! I'll never get that image out of my head!”


Jadzia and Ezri cast each other worried glances. “What's up, Chief? Did you accidentally look into the gagh bucket?” Ezri asked with a sympathetic grimace.


“No, oh God, if only,” Miles moaned. “I can't even say it, it's just... God!


They watched him drop his tools on the edge of the counter and storm out, before curiosity took over and they scrambled to get into the back rooms. However, when Ezri pushed open the door between the main room and the back rooms, she nearly bumped into Julian, who not only looked flushed, but was buttoning his shirt. Her mouth dropped open and Julian uttered a quiet “oh damn,” just in time for Garak to pop up behind him... also fixing his clothes.


“Oh my God,” Ezri breathed, and one second later there was a jubilant yell from Jadzia. “YESSSS! I knew it! I WIN! Cover for me, Ezri, I gotta go to Quark's for my money!”


And then she was gone, leaving Ezri, Julian and Garak in the doorway, the silence dropping heavy and awkward between them. Garak was the one to finally speak up. “It would seem that this particular cat is well and truly out of the bag, wouldn't you agree?”


Julian let himself fall back to lean against the wall and rubbed his forehead. “Ugh, why did I let you talk me into that? And why, of all people, did it have to be Miles who walked in on us?! I am so fired!”


“I'm sure Sisko won't fire you,” Ezri said comfortingly. “I mean, he didn't even fire Worf that time he torpedoed Weyoun with the Defiant...”


“The young lady does have a point,” Garak piped up. “Surely one little indiscretion isn't grounds for termination?”


“You don't know Miles,” Julian argued. “He'll make it sound like we were having an orgy in there or something.”


“You... weren't... were you?”


“NO, Ezri! God...




“Don't you start, Garak. This is all your fault!”


“Pardon me, but last time I checked, it takes two to tango, as it were.”


“And last time I checked, I wasn't the one who couldn't wait until the end of my shift!”


“I never said I couldn't wait, I merely suggested-”


“Oh yes, you suggested all right. With your tongue!”


“That's hardly the point!”


“Oh, I think it is!”


“So now my tongue is the guilty party here, hm? Anyone but you, it would seem.”


“Don't turn this on me!”


“Why not? After all, turnabout is fair play!”


Ezri looked from Garak to Julian and back again as their argument escalated, and in the end she simply let the door slip closed and backed her way into the shop again. As it turned out, a couple of customers had shown up and she happily got back to work.


Sadly, the peace only lasted until Kira came back from a delivery and opened the door to the back rooms.


What the hell do you two think you're doing?! You freaking perverts! I am writing you up this instant!”


Ezri was pretty sure she was supposed to feel bad for both Kira and Miles being exposed to a lot more than they ever wanted to know about Julian's sex life, and maybe also for Julian and Garak being cockblocked twice in one day. But instead she just grinned to herself and made another pizza, while waiting for Jadzia to come back and share the profits from their bet with Quark.