Work Header


Work Text:

It had only been two hours. John had started with throwing a tennis ball against the side of the truck for half an hour, singing the Bee Gees off-key for ten minutes, humming the Bee Gees for another five, and had now resorted to taking a nap leaned up against the olive green killing machine. Russell had had his nose buried in the “URBAN ASSAULT VEHICLE PROJECT EM-50: TECHNICAL MANUAL” the whole time. The amount of weaponry hidden in each vent of this vehicle was staggering.

“This is amazing. You wouldn’t believe what this thing can do.” Russell suddenly noticed how quiet the tin hall was, as his voice, barely above a whisper, echoed. It unnerved him, so he nudged his sleeping friend and said “John?”

Winger did open his eyes for a second, hoping Russell would have mercy on him and let him have a few more minutes. No such luck. “John,” two nudges this time, and Russell laid the manual down on his knee. John looked over to his friend as he asked, out of the blue, “Do you think I’m Officer Material?”

For a second, Winger was trying to work out whether Zisky was being serious. He usually was, but this was a little unusual even for him. Upon deciding he was serious, John sighed.

God, I’m worried about you.” He shook his head.

“Come on! I’m in good shape, I’m walkin’ tall, I’m lookin’ good… First weekend in Europe…”

“Yeah, we’re spending it in an airplane hangar watching a truck.” Sleep had doused some of the flames of John’s rage at Hulka, but they were beginning to reignite. He and Zisky could be half way up an Alp by now, or drowning in German beer with their girls. But no, Hulka had them freezing their asses off babysitting a mini-tank.

“We got each other.” Russell tried softly. Unfortunately, John didn’t seem to get the hint.

“Well I was kinda thinkin’ we get a couple companions this weekend.”

“Too bad the girls are in Germany.” Russell really liked Louise, and he knew John liked Stella, but he missed the time the two of them used to have more of, before the army, and a few times during. Russell’s mind wandered back to those moments, when John let his indestructible persona fall for a while, and all that was left underneath was raw need. John had started talking again.

“Well, we could get a hotel room somewhere…”

Yeah,” Russell liked the sound of that.

“Spend a couple days eating room service…”

“Would’ve been good.”

“We could take ‘em… Take ‘em up into the Alps for a little spin.”

Russell suddenly became acutely aware of John’s eyes bearing down on him. He tore his own eyes away from the manual he’d been pretending to flick through and slowly looked up to meet the blue gaze, then up at the truck. He knew exactly what John was thinking.

No.” Russell whined, closing the book.

“Oh, yeah.


“Hoh, hooh, yeah.”

“No! No, no, no!”

“Yeaaah, yeah!”

“No! Nononoo…”

“Ooh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,

“No, John! No.”

“I’ll drive.”



Abstractly, it had only taken them a few hours to leave Italy, but it was already two in the morning and neither of them had been getting much sleep as of late. They were somewhere near Feldkirch when John pulled the truck over to the side of the road. He nudged Russell, who had dozed off in the passenger seat. They had stopped under a canopy of trees, on what appeared to be a dirt track.

“Where are we?” Russell yawned.

“Germany, maybe Switzerland… somewhere around there. Specifically, we’re off the main road to prevent the public gaze resting upon this.” John gestured vaguely at the inside of the truck. It was still top secret, after all. Russell rubbed his eyes and nodded. “Also to ensure no listeners when I give you the most mind-boggling blowjob of your life.”

That took Russell a few seconds to compute. His hand froze mid-rubbing his face and he slowly looked up to his friend, who was smiling devilishly. All Russell could manage was “…aren’t we on our way to see the girls?”

“And the girls we shall see,” John was inching closer to Russell’s face, still wearing that ridiculous smile. “Tomorrow is another day.”

Russell swallowed. “It is tomorrow.”

Their faces were now inches apart. John’s eyes dashed down to his friend’s lips, then back up. Just as Russell began to move in, John stood up abruptly and walked to the other side of the truck.

“No, you’re right, you’re absolutely right. We should just get some rest.” He pulled the two military sleeping bags they’d stolen down from a shelf and tossed them onto the floor. Russell knew he wasn’t being serious; he’d just have to wait the performance out. “I get it. You’re not attracted to me anymore. I convince you to join the army and now it’s straightened you out too much. Well, I can’t say I’m not disappointed. I would’ve done all those things you like. Plus, I’m wearing my most interesting underwear.” John had undone one of the bags and laid it out across the floor. Russell simply waited. The two locked eyes from across the truck for what seemed like forever, until John threw his hands up into the air and said, “Jesus, how long do I gotta spill my guts before you get over here?”

“I wasn’t sure how long you wanted to drag it out.” Russell got up and advanced toward his friend, looping his arms around his waist.

“I’ll admit it wasn’t my best performance…” John’s sentence fell weakly as Russell began kissing his neck, sucking lightly. “…But I was expecting more of an emotional response.”

Russell looked up. “This isn’t response enough for you?”

John hummed as Russell moved his hips against his. “Mmm, it would be better with a little more-“ John cupped Ziskey’s face and kissed him briefly, sweetly. Pausing for a moment he evaluated his friend’s reaction. Russell’s eyes had fluttered closed and a light blush had washed over his face, a content smile even tugged at the corners of his mouth. John kissed him again, harder this time and a little more urgently. He was beginning to feel Russell more prominently against his hip. Pulling away just as his friend’s hand had come up to tug at his hair, John pushed Russell up against the wall, and began to drop to his knees.

Russell let out and involuntary “Oh,” as he set about undoing his belt and making quick work of the zip. It wasn’t like they hadn’t done this before, but it always took Russell by surprise how forward John was.

Russell’s hand had to grasp around a while for something to steady himself on as John took him into his hand and licked the tip. “You know, I hope this doesn’t change things between us. I feel like if we keep doing this we’re gonna have to get married and I’m not sure if I’m ready for that kind of commit-“ John was interrupted by a fist curled tightly in his hair. “Ow.”

“John, please shut up for a minute.” Thankfully he did, taking kitten-licks of Russell’s cock before wrapping his lips around the head and sucking. Russell’s knuckles were starting to turn white. He couldn’t help the drawn out moan that escaped his throat when John took him into his mouth as much as possible, then start bobbing his head. His hips were starting to jerk on their own accord and John and to push him back with a firm hand. Russell then realized his other fist was still curled quite tightly in his friend’s hair, but he hadn’t complained yet so he kept it there, pushing his head down a bit more.

Another sharp gasp followed by a melting groan made John slow to a stop.

“Wh- What’reyadoin’?” Russell sighed. His knees were starting to get weak. He removed his hand from John’s hair, finally, and John made a scene of pretending that it hurt, rubbing the back of his head. “Don’t worry, Rus.” He cooed. “I’m not finished with you yet. You haven’t even had the chance to appreciate my interesting underwear.” He set about unbuttoning his friend’s shirt, removing it, unbuttoning his own, removing that.

“You feel like helping me out here?” John purred, noticing his stillness.

“Oh, right. Sorry.” Russell helped John in removing the remainder of their clothing except for John’s interesting underwear. Pink silk with a little sausage dog pattern.

“What do you think?” John smiled.

“They’re not your most interesting pair.”

“No? I thought they were pretty neat. You prefer the little machine gun ones?”

“I prefer them off.” And with one swift motion, the pink silk was discarded along with their other clothes. Somehow they’d managed to crawl atop the sleeping bag, limbs entwined and lips attached to any part of the other’s body they could reach. Suddenly, Russell found himself on his back, with John’s teeth in his neck. “Jesus, John…”

John’s right hand found its way down Russell’s torso, stopping briefly to tweak a nipple on the way, and on down to his thigh. Then, it was “Jeeeesus…. Johnn…” melting out from his lips, as he gripped both their cocks in his hand and started pumping, bucking his hips as he did so. John looked up at his friend’s face, which was now a dark shade of pink and twisted into an expression of pure pleasure. He noticed Russell was biting his lip, and, without ceasing the pumping motion, purred “Zisky… Hey, stop that.”

“Wh… Stop what?” Russell didn’t open his eyes, and his voice wasn’t much more than a whimper. John kissed him deeply, sliding their tongues together, then licking at the spot when Russell had almost bit his lip open. “That. You’re gonna hurt yourself, pal. I don’t wanna get the blame for returning you to Hulka as damaged goods.”

“I don’t.. don’t wanna make too much n-noise, Johnnnn…” Russell’s hips were beginning to jolt without rhythm, and John knew him well enough to know that meant he wasn’t going to last much longer. “Yeah, out here, who’s gonna hear you? Some Austrian hitchhiker?”

“I t-thought you said we were in Germany.”

“Christ, who knows, it all looks the same from here.”

Russell’s fingernails sank themselves into John’s back as he sped up the pace, revelling in every gasp and moan his partner made. Then, Russell’s back arched up and he let out a hoarse cry as he came across both their stomachs, and fell onto the sleeping bag a panting mess. John wasn’t far behind, a few more strokes and he came with a grunt, collapsing onto his friend, exhausted. They took a few minutes to recover, the truck echoing with panting and chuckling.

“Fuck me…” Russell managed.

“You’re gonna have to give me a few more minutes and maybe a cup of coffee first.”

“Jesus, John. That was…”

“Please, save the praises. I know where my talents lie. Do you know you just experienced one of the Seven Wonders of the World? I should charge for it, really but I’m not sure about the laws surrounding that in this country. Rus-“ He looked up to his friend to see him already drifting off to sleep. John wiped them down as best he could with his obviously not-so-interesting underwear and wrapped the sleeping bag around them.

“Gute Nacht.” He whispered.

“I thought we were in Austria” A groggy voice replied from above him.

“They speak German, numbskull.”

“Oh. In that case, ich liebe dich.”