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Dragon Age: The Hamquisition

Chapter Text

VIVIENNE:

                There’s nothing rich folks love more

                than going downtown and slumming it with the poor.

                They pull up in the villages and gawk

                at the mages and the Templars

                just to watch them walk.

                Take Leliana, her messengers and spies:

                but oh, she doesn’t realise her advisors

                Cullen, Cassandra, Josephine

                sneak into the tavern just to populate the scene at

 

THE CHARGERS:

                Work, work!

 

CASSANDRA:

                Cassandra!

 

JOSEPHINE:

                Josephine!

 

CULLEN:

                And Cullen!

 

THE CHARGERS:

                Work, work!

                Skyhold’s advistors!

 

CASSANDRA:

                Cassandra!

 

JOSEPHINE:

                Josephine!

 

CULLEN:

                Cullen!

 

THE CHARGERS:

                Work!

 

CULLEN:

                Leli said to be home by sundown –

 

CASSANDRA:

                Leli doesn’t need to know.

 

CULLEN:

                Leli said not to go downtown –

 

JOSEPHINE:

                Like I said, you’re free to go.

 

CASSANDRA:

                But – look around, look around, the

                Inquisition’s happening in Skyhold!

 

JOSEPHINE/CULLEN:

                Skyhold!

 

THE CHARGERS:

                Cassandra!

 

ADVISORS & THE CHARGERS:

                Work!

 

CULLEN:

                It’s bad enough that we’ve got to go to war –

 

JOSEPHINE:

                People shouting in the square –

 

CULLEN:

                It’s bad enough that there’s violence at our door –

 

CASSANDRA:

                New ideas in the air!

 

CASSANDRA & MALE CHARGERS:

                Look around, look around –

 

JOSEPHINE:

                Cassandra, please remind me what we’re looking for –

 

ALL MEN:

                She’s lookin’ for me!

 

CASSANDRA:

                Josie, I’m looking for a mage at work!

 

THE CHARGERS:

                Work, work!

 

CASSANDRA:

                I’m looking for a mage at work!

 

THE CHARGERS:

                Work, work!

 

CASSANDRA:

                I’m looking for a mage at work!

                Whoooaaah!

 

JOSEPHINE/CASSANDRA/CULLEN:

                Whoooaaah!

                Work!

 

VIVIENNE:

                Woo! There’s nothing like summer with a Circle

                someone in a robe helping some fleeing Kirkwall –

                pardon me, Seeker, I know it’s not tactful

                but your armies look like they’ve never seen battle –

                what brought you from Nevarra to Ferelden’s peak?

                Are you searching for a Circle that can give you relief?

 

CASSANDRA:

                Mme, you misjudge me –

 

VIVIENNE:

                Ah, so you’ve discussed me?

                I’m an Orlesian darling, you can trust me!

 

CASSANDRA:

                I’ve been reading Seeker Lambert’s secret book –

                it’s pretty ugly and I don’t know where to look.

                You want an evolution? I want an elevation!

                So listen to my declaration:

 

JOSEPHINE/CASSANDRA/CULLEN:

                We hold this truth to be self-evident:

                that mages should be held as equal.

 

CASSANDRA:

                And when I meet the Empress –

 

THE CHARGERS:

                Uhhh!

 

CASSANDRA:

                I’m’a compel her to include the elves in the sequel!

 

WOMEN & CULLEN:

                Work!

 

JOSEPHINE:

                Look around, look around

                at how lucky we are to be alive right now!

 

JOSEPHINE/CULLEN:

                Look around, look around

                at how lucky we are to be alive right now!

 

JOSEPHINE/CASSANDRA/CULLEN:

                History’s unfolding right here in Skyhold and we just happen to be

                in the greatest battle in the world!

 

ADVISOR’S & THE CHARGERS:

                It’s a lit’ral battle for the world!

 

CASSANDRA:

                ‘Cos I’ve been hearing ‘bout the Templars and abuse,

                the many ways that mages suffered their misuse –

                you want to find redemption? I want a restitution!

                So listen to my new solution:

 

CASSANDRA/JOSEPHINE/CULLEN:

                We hold these truths to be self-evident:

                that elves and mages all are equal!

 

EVERYONE:

                Look around, look around

                at how lucky we are to be alive right now!

                History’s unfolding right here in Skyhold and we just happen to be

 

WOMEN & CULLEN:

                – in the greatest battle in the world!

 

ALL MEN:

                In the greatest battle –

 

THE CHARGERS:

                In the greatest battle for the world!

                Work, work!

 

CASSANDRA:

                Pentaghast!

 

JOSEPHINE:

                Montilyet!

 

CULLEN:

                And Rutherford!

 

CASSANDRA/JOSEPHINE/CULLEN:

                Skyhold’s advisors!

                We’re looking for a mage at work!

 

THE CHARGERS:

                Hey!

 

CASSANDRA/JOSEPHINE/CULLEN:

                Work, work!

 

THE CHARGERS:

                Hey!

 

CASSANDRA/JOSEPHINE/CULLEN:

                Work, work!

 

THE CHARGERS:

                Hey, hey!

 

JOSEPHINE/CULLEN:

                In the greatest battle –

 

CASSANDRA:

                In the greatest battle for the world!

 

THE CHARGERS:

                It’s a lit’ral battle for the world!