Prompt by Adoribullness.
"Hey! I was gonna eat that!"
"Bull. No. Absolutely not."
Bull just sighed. He could admit, perhaps, that the pie had gone a little stale and might not be worth the fight, but still. It was the principle of the matter.
That day, very early in the morning, Dorian had gotten it into his head yet again to clean up Bull's room. It was a dismaying spectacle every time this happened, and it usually resulted in arguments. Dorian had very specific ideas about where things should be stored. It was strange really, but Dorian would defend what he called the natural order of things with a surprising amount of energy. Weapons do not belong in the furniture. Clothes do not belong on the floor. Food does not belong under the bed. Which was fine in and of itself if Dorian was not now making moves towards throwing the pie out.
"Kadan..." Bull said with his best kicked-Mabari voice and expression.
"Oh no. That will not work, not this time. If you get food poisoning from a spoiled pie I am not explaining it to the Inquisitor."
"You know I can't actually get that, right? You know that I run around with poison on my skin all the time?"
Dorian glared. "That is not the same thing and you know it. You can and you do get ill from spoiled meat. And anyway, why you insist on keeping pies under your bed I will never understand."
Bull got up from his chair and carefully edged his way towards Dorian and the pie.
"So what am I supposed to do when I wake up hungry?" He asked, trying to keep up a distraction. Just two more steps-
WHAP! A brilliant white light made Bull screw his eye shut.
When he opened it again, the pie was gone and a pitiful handful of ash was trickling down from between Dorian's fingers. Bull sighed dejectedly and Dorian huffed.
"Alright. You know what? Fine. If you go down to requisitions and ask for a cupboard, you may keep food in here. In the cupboard. Not on the floor. Not under the bed. Do we have an understanding?"
"Yes, Kadan," Bull answered dutifully.
If he played his cards right, requisitions might even let him have an icebox.