When she first showed up, Luke didn’t trust the girl because he could see no trace of darkness in her. Everyone had light and dark inside. He feared that he had grown too old and too numb to be able to sense her darkness. But it was his responsibility to train her and Luke was nothing if not a man who did his duty.
With every day, he became more delighted with her progress. She learned fast and he opened up to her. He was still afraid he would fail her as a teacher, but less and less as time went by.
Then he got to see the darkness.
It was a late afternoon, and he had allowed her some free time after a series of grueling tests. He heard noises from her room. There was a whimper and then the sound of objects hitting walls, falling to the ground, breaking. He rushed there, lightsaber in hand, ready to defend her from anything and anyone. He burst through her door and… she was alone. There was a vase in pieces in one corner of the room. Water, flowers and shards were covering part of the floor. The desk pressed against the wall, just it was the opposite wall than the one it had been secured to when he had last seen the room, and Rey’s boots were on it. Above the desk, there were marks on the wall where, probably where the boots had rebounded from onto the desk.
Rey was in bed, and was looking at him confused. Her pupils were dilated and she was holding on to the edge of the bed with a white knuckled grip.
“What happened?” he asked, turning off his lightsaber.
“Kylo Ren,” she said through gritted teeth.
He didn’t ask, allowing her to compose herself.
“I was falling asleep, and… he just showed up.”
Luke refrained from saying it was just a dream considering her violent reaction. He also considered and rejected the he’s not really here line on the grounds that she would probably find something to throw at him. He wasn’t afraid of her, but saw no reason to annoy her. She was a very level-headed young woman and after the temper tantrum she obviously knew Kylo wasn’t there. What bothered him the most were the obvious signs of sexual arousal.
“Are you ok now?” he asked.
She nodded and he accepted the lie.
He paid more attention to what she was feeling after that. And to his horror, he realized that she was dreaming of Kylo Ren. The bastard was in her bed every night! Luke felt her wanting, needing, writhing… and fighting. He understood her and he was fiercely proud of her. But it was too delicate a subject, so days went by without talking about it.
He understood her better than she would believe. He could write the book about coping with desire for someone who was forbidden. To his deepest shame, sometimes he still thought of Leia when he touched himself. He wished there was something, anything he could do for Rey. But he knew better. There would be no rushing this. She had to go through the fire and if she remained whole at the end, she would be stronger.
At night, he heard her moans and her curses. Her body demanded satisfaction. Her will refused it. She couldn’t resemble him more if she were his own flesh and blood.
It was getting worse. She was losing focus in her training. In one of their lightsaber combat lessons, he nearly cut off her arm. As much as he disliked the prospect, Luke accepted that he had to have the talk with her.
“Rey, you have to do something about this. It’s affecting your training.”
She opened her mouth to deny it. Closed it again. Opened it again, but nothing came out. Troubling reaction.
“What can I do about it?”
She blurted the question and it didn’t seem sarcastic. Luke wanted to sigh. What had he done to have to deal with a hormonal teenager raised in isolation? From everything he knew about her, she hadn’t had much contact with other humans, but still! It wasn’t like anyone had had to teach him to pleasure himself! He cringed at the idea of his uncle Owen coming to his room and lecturing him about masturbatory techniques. Or worse! Yoda! He was getting sidetracked.
“You must know… something you can do about it,” he said in the less antagonizing tone he could muster.
She threw him a look which told him that any other tone would have earned him some very bad words.
“I really don’t want to do that with him in my head,” she said eventually.
“Oh,” Luke said.
He had nothing. It was his turn to open his mouth, close it and repeat.
“Yep,” she said.
He thought back at his dilemma. When he first found out that the woman he had spent some two years fantasizing about was his sister… what had he done? After the first urge to gauge his eyes out because he’d read that to be an appropriate reaction to unwittingly engaging in incestuous activities, he… oh, yes. He thought about other women. And did much more than just think about them. He’d been pissed off enough with Yoda and Obi-Wan for concealing so much truth from him that he disregarded their rules about attachment. After blowing up the second Death Star… he got laid as much as he could.
“Umm… Why don’t you focus on someone else? That Finn boy you mentioned…”
“Eeeew! He’s my friend!” she said. “It’s like… if Leia thought about you when… Just eeeew!”
Wisely, Luke let it go. The idea of his sister thinking about him… not eeeew at all.
“Then someone else. Just think of a man you like, picture him naked and hold on to that image to push away whatever imprint Kylo left.”
No, really, he was a war hero. A Jedi Master. An all-around nice guy. He shouldn’t have to have a sex talk with a teenager. He looked at Rey, and she seemed so miserable he shrugged away all thoughts of self-importance.
“I’m sorry, but there’s nothing I can do to help. I don’t have any holo vids here. You will have to rely on your own imagination.”
“That’s all right,” she said despondently. “This whole thing is so damn embarrassing. It’s not like I think he’s handsome or anything. It’s just… We had that moment… that connection… I’ve never known anyone so intimately.”
And there it was. Back to awkward.
“Do you mean you never…”
He didn’t want to finish that question. Maybe she meant emotionally intimate.
“Not much chance for that on Jakku. I wasn’t physically compatible with most species there. Then… everything else happened so fast… So my life was: Jakku alone. Then flying around with Finn. Then Kylo. Then here.”
History repeating. His chronology was: first Tatooine. Then flying around with Han and Leia. Then Vader. Then Yoda. She was looking at him expectantly. He was sure he never looked at Master Yoda like that.
“Hang in there, kid. It’s going to get easier.”
She smiled sadly. They didn’t address the matter again, but Luke kept trying to think of ways to help her. Short of going into her room and offering her an orgasm with his own fingers, he was stuck. Night after night, he sensed her struggle against her demanding young body and her determination not to give in to the suggestions Kylo had planted in her mind.
He came out with a solution out of sheer desperation. He knew her habits by heart, so it was just a matter of timing to give her the chance to see him naked. As planned, Rey walked in the communal shower. He kept washing his hair, thus he had a reason to have his eyes closed, giving her time to study him. As if a Jedi relied solely on what he could see.
She was watching him with a hungry fascination. Her thoughts completely unguarded. She was thinking some very complimentary things about him and to his embarrassment, his body was beginning to react.
That night for the first time in weeks, he was able to sense her arousal, followed by an orgasm. Everything seemed fine, but a few nights later, the call came.
He heard the whisper, carried gently through the Force. It was not something he was overhearing. She was summoning him. Luke closed his eyes. His smart idea had failed. He could sense her yearning, stronger than before. He walked to her room with a heavy heart. He was glad to be there and felt terrible for it.
He sat on the edge of her bed. Rey reached for his hand, and led it under the sheets. The room smelt faintly of sex, but Luke tried to focus on what was expected of him. His fingers found their way in her slickness with ease. He experimented with touches, trying minute changes to offer her the perfect touch. She gasped and moaned and relished his delicate treatment of her clit. The small, fine circles with the tips of his fingers. She sighed, she whimpered and she came apart when his fingers found the spot inside her.
There was no trace of darkness or Kylo Ren in the waves of her climax. There was only light. And Luke.