Back in space, you hadn’t been much more than a young girl studying old history books. Were was something oddly fascinating about how humans had started wars believing it was their right to own other countries resources. You knew every step, every word and every motive that had led humans to be forced to live in space. You knew enough to know that floating people because of one tiny fault was wrong. And that was what got you into jail and onto earth along with the other criminal teenagers. You lied for Bellamy Blake. You never told anyone about the little girl living illegally under the floor. Even though you knew. And even though they knew you knew, you kept quite. And Bellamy had no idea.
On earth you were some kind of politician. Negotiating between peaceful clans, translating trying to keep things together. Let’s just say you were the good fairy. There wasn’t anyone that didn’t like you or asked you for help if needed. But lately, you had become Bellamy’s second hand of somewhat. Since you landed you both connected, not only because you and Octavia got really great along, but because you were the first girl saying ‘No’ to any kind of sexual rapprochement from his side. Oh don’t get it wrong, you surely did admire his firm abs, strong arms and that hair but really, after being on earth for such a short amount of time, sexy times wasn’t something you thought about a lot. So you became friends and partners. Really, really, really good friends if you were honest. You were both able to rely on each other without feeling like a bother nor did Bellamy feel the need to keep up his mask of the strong warrior and leader around you. He was strong and his character development during the last months really suited his role as a leader. But everyone needed a place to calm down now and then. You were his. And he was yours. But lately something had changed, you weren’t sure what it was. Was it the fact that you had been sleeping in his tent since you woke from nightmares every night and Bellamy seemed to be able to hold them back, his arm that was draped around your waist when you woke every morning. Or was it the late night bonfire talks were you sat so closely together that you could feel his breath on your face? Or maybe the one time where you got attacked by a grounder trying to save a tortured grounder woman and you got yelled at by a furious Bellamy for being so stupidly selfless and the words ‘Don’t you have anything to live for?’ before the stomped out of the med tent. Something had changed. He wasn’t just your friend anymore. He was so much more.
So then you heard that Bellamy had traded places with Jasper and was now Murphy’s hostage, you freaked out. You literally dropped everything and left your working place hurrying to the drop ship.
Octavia yelling at the door for Murphy to let her brother go didn’t soothe your anxiety and worry.
‘’O’ , what happened?’’, your hurriedly asked being instantly evolved by a tight hug.
‘’He traded places, Y/N! Murphy is going to kill him, he still wants revenge!!’’
You knew she was right but since you protected her from the ark people , she became someone you needed to protect at all costs, which is why you repressed your own horror and forced a (hopefully) convincing smile on your face.
‘’Don’t worry, it’s Bellamy we’re talking about ! Plus I might just have an idea. Stay back, alright?’’
You squeezed her fingers and turned around to Jasper. Your heart was pounding with fear and adrenaline, but you never were someone to stand back. You acted.
‘’You good to go? I need your help.’’ He nodded, seemingly okay after his own hostage situation.
You made your way under the drop ship looking around for a way to hot-wire the drop ship door open. That was the moment you noticed the ton of hydrazin left over from when the 100’s crash-landed.
‘’We can’t fire a gun, Jasper. Everything will blow up!’’, you whispered, well aware that Murphy might be able to hear you.
Just that second, you heard a shot coming off from the walls within, suppressing your whimper and the sheer horror you were being overrun with . You could hear Octavia screaming Bellamy’s name , calling on the radio to make sure he was okay. It had been a warning shot apparently, but that didn’t calm you down a bit. You were 100 percent sure now that Bellamy wouldn’t come out alive unless you found a way to open that damn door.
‘’We need to get the door open, Y/N!’’, Jasper hissed making you snarl angrily at him. As if you didn’t know.
‘’I’m trying okay? I just need some...’’ she wasn’t a technician for gods sake, she needed Raven but she was elsewhere.
‘’I have it !’’
You found the wires that controlled the door.
‘’Go back and get ready!’’, you whispered listening to the conversation inside of the ship.
It nearly brought tears to your eyes. There was Bellamy admitting he had been a coward publically-hanging Murphy all these months ago and telling him he was sorry. He really was. You were able to tell.
‘’ As soon as I walk out of here your little sister and Y/N will be dead. You shall suffer just as I did! ‘’ Murphy grunted before you could hear a smothered ‘’Never!’’ ,from Bellamy apparently trying to defend himself.
You moved quickly, trying to get a hold of the wires, accidently sparking some and making noises.
In only a second you were being attacked by bullets, Murphy shooting several rounds into the drop ship floor before his gun blocked.
You were running high on adrenaline, not noticing the serious wound forming on your stomach until you unlocked the mechanism of the door, hearing Jasper and O’ storming the drop ship rescuing Bellamy. It wasn’t until you heard Bellamy’s voice that you knew he was okay, that you let your legs give out underneath you leaning against some box. Well, shit you thought. You looked down noticing your white T-Shirt slowly turning into a red one. Why your first thought was that you might never be able to have children after that would forever be a mystery you. They would never have your hair color and Bellamy’s eyes… Bellamy. He was save. You could tell by the mixed voices above you. Good. You weren’t a fool, you knew why you started to see your surroundings in a haze, you were losing way too much blood. So your death would actually be in favor of saving someone else’s life ? What a good way to go. Your granny would be proud.
‘’Oh my god, Y’N!’’, Octavia called out in horror alarming Bellamy.
‘’What do you mean? Where is she?’’ All the events from earlier suddenly didn’t matter anymore, all that did was the realization that his sister thought Y/N was in danger.
‘’She was under the floor of the drop ship!’’ ‘’Murphy shot on the floor!’’ both O’ and Jasper declared just as Bellamy ran out of the ship, relying on the others to handle Murphy. Were wasn’t anything else on his mind than you.
‘’Y/N!’’ he called your name making his way towards.
‘’Y/N what are you-NO’’ Later everyone would try to convince you that his scream was able to be heard in the whole camp.
But right now, everything you saw when you opened your eyes was his pale face cradling yours inside his palms.
‘’Bellamy.’’,you murmured relieved at seeing him well and alive. You tried to live your arm but you were too weak.
‘’No no, don’t move !’’
You felt your shirt being lifted and heard Bellamy cursing.
‘’Don’t…curse…Bell.’’, you mocked him quietly smiling lately.
‘’I curse whenever I want to, angel ! ‘’ You could have sworn you heard tears.
‘’Keep breathing, okay? Don’t leave me! Don’t you dare leave me, Y/N’’
You felt so dizzy but felt the need to reassure Bellamy.
‘’I’m fine.’’, you sighed lifting your arm to place your hand against his cheek.
‘’I’m fine because you’re alive. I was so scared.’’
Bellamy felt the tears, but he didn’t care. All he cared about was you dying in his arms and only just because she tried to save you.
‘’Hold on, angel. Here’s still so much to do here, have you forgotten ? All clans to make amends with, build a proper home and all the babies to raise!’’
While he spoke he carefully shifted you on his arms walking outside.
He didn’t know what he was hoping for, the constant hope on his sisters face maybe? Because the minute she looked at Y/N she went pale and the look on her face said everything.
Did he keep crying? Maybe.
‘’Get the med tent ready!’’ The grounder woman that had been saved by Y/N was apparently the only person who had her thoughts straight.
‘’Clarke isn’t here she is the only-‘’, Jasper started only to be interrupted by Angelica , that was her name.
‘’I know medicine. I help!’’
For Bellamy to consider this option showed how desperate he was.
‘’Bell?’’, Y/N whispered cuddled against him.
‘’Yes my love ? ‘’
‘’Don’t let go, okay?’’
He closed his eyes and inhaled deeply.
‘’Never. But that’s two sided, you get me? You can’t let go, got it?’’
He felt you smiling against him nodding slightly.
‘’ ‘Kay. So tired Bell.’’, that was barely a whisper.
He looked up and faced Angelica.
‘’Please. I will forever owe you.’’,he said sincere being confused by the smile and the ‘no’ head shaking of the woman.
‘’She give me life. I give her life.’’
Bellamy looked down at you while following the grounder woman.
‘’Don’t sleep, stay awake, you hear me? You can sleep later and I will hold you really tight, okay?’’, he demanded softly, his heart breaking at the sight of you barely even breathing but still managing a ‘’sounds great’’
You didn’t know when you blacked out. You remembered being carried by Bell , feeling save but also so so much pain.
The next time you opened your eyes you were laying on your back, facing the ceiling of a familiar tent. Strangely, you knew right away what had happened, the dull pain in your stomach supporting your memories. You licked your dry lips, blinking and trying to adjust your eyes in the darkness of Bellamy’s tent. Bellamy.
‘’Bell?’’,you whispered hoarsely turning your head to where you felt a hot body laying next to you.
When he didn’t stir you had to chuckle. He could be such a light sleeper, always on alert, but with you he was a goner.
‘’ Bell! Hey!’’,you tried it a little louder this time, grinning when he shot up on the spot.
‘’Y/N!’’, he called aiming for your face and actually cradling your cheeks in his hands.
‘’ By the gods…’’,he murmured. Weird, that was something Angelica always said.
‘’ How long was I unconscious?’’, you asked enjoying his warm fingers on your skin, slightly tracing your cheek bones.
‘’A whole week.’’,he answered absent too indulged into feeling your moving body again.
‘’A whole week????’’ Oh hell no, your hair was probably greasy and you had to smell really really bad.
Anyway, what were you even wearing? Only a T-Shirt, and it was way too large for you.
‘’Do you have some water?’’,you asked thereupon Bellamy fumbled around for some candles to light up the tent before handing you a bottle of water and holding up your head a little for you to drink.
‘’Oh god, don’t look at me.’’, you groaned when your mouth didn’t feel so dry anymore.
‘’ I gotta look like shit.’’
‘’Watch your language, Y/N Y/L/N’’, he mocked you stroking some hair out of your face.
‘’You’re perfect.’’,he said quietly.
‘’As mad as I am at you for being so stupid again and almost dying , all I wanna do is hold you really close right now and not letting you go, okay?’’ His face was vulnerable , you knew you had the ability to break him right here, right now.
‘’Come here. Just don’t crush me, okay? And don’t you dare complain about how I smell!’’ You tried to lighten up the mood while welcoming him in your arms. Bellamy laid his head on your breasts carefully, listening to your heartbeat while placing a hand on your, oh hello, naked thigh.
‘’Why am I not wearing pants, Blake ?’’
‘’Angelica said that you wearing my clothes would soothe your soul and healing abilities and my pants are all too big for you.’’ A mumbled reply.
‘’Since when do you listen to grounders?’’
‘’Since one got you back from the dead.’’
He pressed a kiss on your collarbone.
The silence that stretched out between you two was comfortable. There was still so much unfelt to say but right now, everything that mattered was to feel each other.
‘’O’ told me.’’Bellamy interrupted the silence by speaking up, but not moving away.
‘’Told you what?’’
‘’That you’re the reason they haven’t found out about her early and we’re the reason you got send down here in the first place.’’
You remained silent. You had told that his sister during some drunk bonding time. You just…never really considered telling Bellamy too.
When you stayed silent Bellamy shifted on his arms, hovering over you.
‘’Why did you never tell me?’’, he asked serious.
‘’It never mattered. I don’t …want you to feel like you owe me anything. I know you Bell. What I did...was just the right thing to do.’’
He looked into your eyes, searching for something, for some greater meaning maybe.
‘’We’re the reason your on earth.’’,he stated simply.
I smiled lightly. ‘’Well, yeah. But..’’ You reached up, tracing his cheek bones with your finger.
‘’If I wasn’t, I wouldn’t have met you. Would I?’’
You played with a cheeky little curl in his neck.
‘’And that would be really tragic. You suck Blake, but I need you. I almost went crazy when I heard you were locked up in the drop ship with Murphy. Do you have any idea how scared I was?’’
He adverted his eyes before looking right back into yours.
‘’If you were as scared as I was when I saw you bleeding out, yeah. I do. Because Y/N, I don’t think I could have survived if you had died. You’re….you’re my person. You’re my family. There’s no one I love more than you and Octavia. This world can be so ugly and cruel but you always make me see new perspectives , new motives, new ideas. This home we’re trying to build? It wouldn’t work without you. Me without you? I would be nothing. Angelica said a few… interesting things and I feel like she is right. Don’t you ever date to die on my, angel. You hear me?’’
You swallowed. You wanted to ask what Angelica said but most importunately …
‘’You love me? Like you love O?’’
That made Bellamy laugh. Of course , his best friend was back.
‘’No, stupid. I . Love. You. I love you the way the men love their women in your books. You had me worried really really big and I don’t intend to live this life without kissing you good morning and good night every day.’’
His eyes were so tender and honest that you struggled to keep your tears in.
‘’Well…’’,you laughed biting your lip
‘’I love you the way these women in my books love their men. And I think dawn is creeping upon us do don’t you think that you should start keeping your promise right now?’’
You heard him chuckle, and as he leaned down pressing his lips softly against yours, you knew that everything was going to be alright as long as you had him by your side.