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I'm Gonna Give You The Slip

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“Stop rescuing me,” Hux snarled. Dust rose into the air when he straightened his greatcoat with a jerk. His blaster had been knocked from his hand when he had been pushed backwards onto his arse, and he tried to surreptitiously look for it in a way that didn't appear utterly stupid. In between shooting venomous looks at the man who had been nothing more than a six foot thorn in his side since he had boarded Hux’s ship.

Glaring at Kylo Ren’s helmet was proving very unsatisfactory, particularly when the occupant of the ridiculous costume was being strangely silent. Hux wished, for once, that Ren would throw a tantrum. It would make him look dignified in comparison, as opposed to the image he currently held: a general who had been pushed into the dirt (and perhaps yelped) so that his guard dog could show off.


He should talk to Snoke about getting Ren some psychiatric help to address his desperate need for attention. Even if nothing happened, that at least would provoke a tantrum-- because nothing proved one was emotionally stable quite like destroying expensive equipment with an absurd laser sword. But in the best case scenario, it might actually work. Though the thought of a stable Ren was so bizarre as to be about as frightening as Kylo Ren thought he was.


Hux clenched his jaw.

“You may call yourself a knight, but as you are not one of the fabled shining armor variety, stop treating me like your distressed princess.”


There was a long pause, and even through the voice filter Hux could hear the smug note of victory in Ren’s voice.


(A couple more years of having to listen to that and he was going to develop one of those suppressed-rage eye twitches.)


“But you play the part so well, General.”



Kylo Ren was being worse than usual. Which was saying rather a lot, all things considered. He kept pushing Hux out of the way of totally salvageable situations, cutting through the ranks to tackle him to the ground for this reason or that. And even amidst the strange, near possessive behavior, he still did his level best to drive Hux to an aneurysm. Hux really couldn't be blamed that he was pushing back.



“Lord Ren. I assume you're here to further your attempts to get your mouth on my prick, or whatever this strange obsession is.”




Technically -- technically -- it didn't count as any sort of Inappropriate Conduct Between Superior And Subordinate issue, seeing as Kylo Ren sort of hovered outside of the chain of command rather than being a part of it. “Sith-In-Training” was not, actually, a designated office in the First Order. Besides, if he chose to complain to Snoke, it would at least be hilarious. But he wouldn't complain. This was how it was with them, always egging each other on. Pushing to see when their colleague would snap. There wasn't much else to do for amusement up in space. Though Hux was fairly certain that Ren did just because he was of a reactionary nature, rather than Hux’s own attempts at a diversion to cope with all the looming that went on on his ship.


He looked up at Ren, eyebrows raised expectantly. There was another beat. It was dragging on long enough to almost lend weight to the idea that Hux might have hit the nail on the head. Which was a truly horrifying thought, and he promptly did his best to forget it.


“Usually the metaphor is that the other party is trying to crawl up your ass, is it not?”


Hux gave Ren a look. It wasn't supposed to be this easy, but if he was going to paint a figurative target on himself the general wasn't going to pass up the chance for a free shot.

“Is that really the point you want to be arguing?” he paused a minute to let it sink in. “Not planning on refuting anything?”


After another minute of silent sulking, Ren left. He never even explained why he had sought Hux out in the first place.



“Is your name actually General?”


“Congratulations, Ren, through your mighty Sith powers you have unearthed the secret that everyone has known for years. But I bet you've been working on some puns, so I'll give you the chance to say them. To be polite.”


“You don't care about politeness.”


“Not where you're concerned, no. Go bother someone else with your oppressive aura of angst.”


Ren did not leave. Hux looked up from his reports but did not cease writing.


“One has to wonder if he didn't name you something else because he only ever thought you would get this far.”


Ren was pleased with himself. He wasn't wearing that ghastly helmet, and so Hux had a perfect view of how his lips bowed into a smirk and eyes narrowed. Hux watched the expression melt away when he laughs right in the other man's face. There's confusion, a flicker of hurt, then anger.


“Daddy issues, Ren? That's the hill you wish to die on? Because you won't win this one, I can promise you that.”


Kylo Ren turned and stalked away without another word. You could almost see the wounded pride dripping off of his tense figure.


“And my name isn't ‘General’, idiot!” Hux felt compelled to shoot at his back.



Honestly .


“Been thinking.”


Ren wasn't wearing his helmet, again. His expression is curiously guarded.




“You make a lot of references to my mouth on you.”


“That happened once.”


“Is that something you crave, General?”


Hux actually covered his eyes for a moment, as if the very suggestion gave him a headache due to its sheer stupidity.

He couldn't tell if Ren was trying to needle him, which was… concerning. The alternative was that this was flirting. Better put an end to that, if it was.


“The only reason I would ever want your mouth on me would be to prove I can do it better.”


(He knew Ren was competitive, why would he say such a thing? That would only rile him up, eager to prove himself. Mistake.)






Hux was proud of himself for not dropping anything. He searched the Knight's features, and Ren made an aborted shrugging motion. His large, overly dramatic costume amplified it even if he had meant to cut it off before it could truly be seen. His eyes were evasive, and didn't meet Hux’s.


“Why not?”


It was probably indicative of some sort of impending emotional breakdown that Hux didn't have a good answer to that.



Ren had barely gotten Hux’s trousers open when he stopped. Hux was trying to figure out if it was the coppery-blond curls that had brought him up short, but that was ridiculous. Unless Ren was somehow hairless himself, he had to know that was normal-- no matter what sort of grooming his previous partners had done.

And Hux was very well-groomed, thank you.


“You've got freckles.” the tone of voice was somewhat wondering.


Since Hux had essentially thrown down his gauntlet in a challenge (stupid), Ren had been stoic with grim resolve. It was like he thought blowjobs involved interrogation bots, really. Or was he going over his knowledge, preparing for the approaching test, as it were?

Until now. He had stilled, expression softened.


Hux nudged him with the toe of his boot, hoping it would break Ren out of his strange daze and spur him to get a move on.


“Hardly an original observation.”


The next thing Ren did wasn't original either; he brushed the very tips of his fingers across Hux’s abdomen as though he would be able to feel the freckles in addition to seeing them. The muscles in the general's stomach tensed involuntarily. When he looked down, he could see that Ren was pressing his lips together to keep from smiling. Cocky bastard.


Ren's hands hovered near the zip of his trousers, and Hux breathed out hard through his nose before pushing them away and undoing it the rest of the way for him. He wasn't going to wait around for Ren to build up the nerve to get into his pants. If he couldn't do it then that was a forfeit.


Hux leaned back on his elbows and looked down at Ren.


Ren was staring at his partly erect cock. Yes, the talk of blowjobs had gotten to him. He wasn't a droid. But the way Ren's lips parted and the darting eyes made Hux certain of what he had suspected: the other man had never done this before. Whether sex in general or this act in particular, Ren was unfamiliar.



Hux’s prick was flushed pink and rosy, swelling against his thigh. The wet head was just beginning to push out past the foreskin. He could feel the licks of heat that went straight to his groin. Ren looking at him; taking him in -- it was arousing. Hux wasn't vain about his genitals, but there was a certain pride in baring yourself to someone without any degree of self consciousness or doubt. He knew people liked his cock. He had been told so. On plenty of occasions. It had a nice curve, if listing somewhat to the left, and was a good, satisfying length and girth.


However, Ren was apparently not an aficionado of the penis. He wasn't even vaguely familiar.


(Aside from, presumably, his own.)


He glanced up at Hux, that small gesture of asking for permission and guidance keying him in to Ren's uncertainty at the prospect of performing badly. For a brief moment, Hux wondered what Snoke had done in order to make the idea of failure so terrible, but he quickly decided he didn't want to know.


“There's not much you could do at this point that won't feel good, but doing nothing is one of them.”


The look of uncertainty faltered, was interrupted by a flash of determination that then took over his entire visage. Better. Hux smiled to himself and raked Ren’s hair back from his face. He met the look of irritation with one of absolute innocence.


There was one more moment of hesitation, like Ren was trying to decide how to eat an unfamiliar dish -- ha -- and his hand paused a moment before he visibly steeled himself and took Hux’s cock in his grip. Hux let out a long breath through his nose, and his knees automatically slipped outward, further opening himself. He watched with half-lidded eyes as Ren familiarized himself. A squeeze, a long stroke with his gaze fixed to the place where the head was revealed as the foreskin was drawn back. Fingers tracing over Hux’s balls, cupping their weight. The backs of his hands brushed against the insides of Hux’s thighs over the course of his investigation, and the general had to repress a shiver each time.


The first noise caught in his throat when Ren sucked his own thumb into his mouth before sliding the opposite hand down Hux’s shaft, revealing the entire head and letting the foreskin catch on the lip of it, keeping it bared. Then he ran his thumb over the crown, his own spit mixing with the slickness of pre-come that had begun to gather.


Hux tipped his head back, eyes sliding closed. It had been awhile, alright? He had gotten busy with the whole restoring-the-glory-of-the-former-empire business. Somewhat fumbling though this was, it felt good to have another person's hands on him. He just had to lean back and relax.

...Provided that other person wouldn't need coaching.


He huffed out the beginning of a laugh when Ren put his mouth on him. It was more like a wet kiss than anything. Slick lips slid off of the tip and returned to take the general's cock further into his mouth. It was, at this point, little more than warm and wet.


But again; it had been awhile.


When he pulled off, Hux reached out and raked some of Ren's hair back from his face. He gave Ren a sly smile in response to the glare he received.


“No teeth.”


“I know ,” Ren growled, and tried to take all of Hux into his mouth in one go.


It couldn't have been more than two seconds later than he came up sputtering, throat convulsing and breath ragged. Hux had to suppress the laughter that welled up when he noticed the darkly suspicious look Ren was giving his prick.


“Don't blame it. And there's no need for choking yourself unless you've a death wish. In which case I'd be happy to use more conventional means.”


Ren rubbed his jaw and the affronted expression stayed firmly on his features, as though his honor had been slighted or he had been the butt of an unexpected joke.


The silence stretched taut and uncomfortable.


“Giving up already?”


Did this mean he didn't have to do anything, or was his victory only valid if he also proved superior at cocksucking himself? If he threw Ren out of his quarters now, would he be expected to participate in a sort of rematch in the future?

They really hadn't gone over the terms clearly enough.


However, a tentative assessment:


Hux: 1

Kylo Ren: 0


Despite his, ah, unscratched itch , Hux found he could live with this.


“Of course not.” Ren's voice dripped condescension.




But, exchanging his lead for an orgasm wasn't--


That is to say he didn't--


Well, he wasn't going to complain about it.





Ren wasn't quite so intrepid this time around. He took it slower, more careful. Yet something almost frenzied remained. A tight, electric energy borne of-- desperation, perhaps.


It was working.


Hux, without truly thinking about it, began to talk him through it.


“That's it, Ren. That's good.” He sucked his bottom lip between his teeth. It really had been a long time if someone on their first blowjob could actually do something for him beyond standard enjoyment.


“Good. Again.”


Ren was a quick learner. He took the directions to heart and applied them as he was able.


“That's--” Hux’s voice cut out but he wasn't going to lose his manners now. Just because this was Kylo Ren didn't mean he wasn't going to give him an option to pull off if he didn't feel like getting a mouthful of come. One didn't just force that on someone, after all. “I'm almost there.”


To Hux’s surprise, Ren didn't pull off. He was going to see this through. Hux could appreciate that, even if he wasn't sure the other man wouldn't regret it.


But then Hux wasn't thinking about that at all, because his muscles were singing with released tension, euphoria flooding his veins, and he was spilling himself into Kylo Ren's mouth. It was far from the best blowjob he had ever received, but it was better than his hand any day. There was potential.


Not that Hux would ever see it come to fruition, seeing as they were just doing this to prove a point.


He tucked himself back into his trousers, glanced down at Ren.


Ren cleared his throat. It was a thick, wet sound. He looked like he was fighting the urge to get a drink of water. Hux was sympathetic. He remembered what the seconds after were like the first time. Contrary to the what the porn holos liked to say, nobody really enjoyed the taste of come-- let alone craved it. You may like the act or the association of the taste, but the taste on its own? Not pleasant.


Somewhat entranced by the image he struck, Hux hauled him up from the floor with two hands on his jaw and crushed their mouths together. He told himself it was about establishing dominance by showing he wasn't disgusted by the thought of tasting himself or some other ludicrous male posturing act. Really he just felt like kissing the other man.

Which didn't need dwelling on.


Ren made a small, surprised sound against Hux’s mouth. That would be a point in Hux’s favor, if they still were keeping score. He was. Ren took to this quicker than oral, which suggested experience. Hux was privately amused at the thought of the poor sods who had kissed Kylo Ren before he remembered that, well, he was one of them.


(Let's call that a humbling thought.)


The Knight had planted his sizeable hands on Hux’s thighs, stretching up into the kiss. It didn't seem comfortable. But if Hux was kissing hungrily, Ren was starving. He was practically crawling up the General's form, forcing him backwards and supine as he himself straightened and put a knee on the bed. His hands slid up, cupping Hux’s face. His hands really were very large. Hux could admit he found that enticing.


There was hair that was not his own falling across his face, a tongue slick in his mouth, and the warmth of another body sinking to press against his own.

Lovely .


It took him a moment to realize that Ren was trying to talk, slurring the words into the open mouthed kiss without disengaging. Hux barely managed to keep from snorting at him. He pulled away and put a hand on Ren's chest when he instinctively leaned back into it.


“Don't speak with your mouth full.” Hux tried for a smirk, but was distracted by running the thumb of his free hand along the full curve of Kylo Ren's lower lip.


Ren scowled. Aside from the intimidation factor, it was obvious why he wore the helmet: he seemed to have no control over his facial expressions and, more often than not, ended up looking like a petulant child. Or perhaps wearing the helmet had kept him from thinking about how he might appear to others. Had he donned it to guard his expressions, or had his guard fallen due to having worn it? He could ask, but he didn't care enough to.

Hux could practically hear him grinding his teeth.


“I said,” he bit out, “ ‘Was it that good?’ ”


Hux did snort, now.


“It wasn't bad.”

He wasn't about to tell Kylo Ren all the things he had liked about the oral sex he had just received. He had more pride than that. Though, truly, it wasn't bad at all. Hux wasn't even lying.


Ren's lips twisted into a sneer.

“Let's see you do better.”


“Please,” Hux didn't roll his eyes (a general doesn’t roll their eyes; don't be ridiculous) but he had spent long years perfecting his ‘unimpressed in a dry, aloof sort of way’ expression, and he directed it full strength at Ren. “I went to Academy.”


Hux tried to roll them over, one knee pressed hard to Ren’s hip. Nothing happened. The Knight's dark brows were raised, expectant. Waiting for whatever Hux’s retort had implied. He was unconsciously pushing back against Hux’s attempt, likely not seeing it for what it was in his inexperience.


“Could you--? Ah,”




“Look, just--...”


“Oh. Sorry.”


He couldn't keep himself from letting out a triumphant “Ha!” when Ren finally got the idea and they swapped positions.

Ren coughed out a laugh, and the amused smile that twisted his lips seemed near genuine.






Long fingers threaded through Hux’s hair. He shook his head, dislodging them before he had the chance to sink into the sensation and forget the whole reason they were here.


...Which he may have already forgot.


“Quit it. Do you want me to suck your cock or not?”


Ren shrugged, as if it made no difference to him. Although there was a bright, eager quality to his gaze regardless, and a flush high on his cheeks. Hux bit his tongue. He wasn't going to grin while in bed with Kylo Ren . That absolutely was not going to happen.

As his mouth was clearly traitorous, Hux put it to use before it could smile, or talk, or any number of ridiculous things. Instead, he sunk his teeth into Kylo Ren's neck.


Ren gasped, and his body tensed under Hux’s own, like he was trying to decide if this was an attack or an advance. He seemed to decide once Hux started to suck, arching up with his breath shuddering out of him in quick bursts. Once or twice, what might have been a whine seemed to catch on his teeth just before it escaped his mouth. Hux most certainly did not growl when this happened, and he also did not blindly reach for Ren's hand and lace their fingers together tight when he found it.


By the time Hux had finished with him, Ren's skin would be scattered with any number of hickeys and bite marks.


Hux found he didn't have a problem with this whatsoever.


He made his way down the other man's body with long sweeps of his hands and nips of his teeth through layers of fabric. Ren was wonderfully reactive, and by the time Hux was level with the conspicuous bulge in his pants he was practically writhing.


Hux looked up, ready to make eye contact as he mouthed through the fabric (always a winner ) and-- Oh .


Ren was a wreck .


The two spots of color on his cheeks had bloomed into a fevered flush. He alternated between taking long gulps of air and biting down hard on his lower lip. His chest heaved and shuddered. Long fingers clutched at Hux’s bedspread, dragging in more fabric every time they spread, then tightened anew.

Hux had half a mind to leave him like this. To go to the refresher and get a glass of water. Would even that small interruption prove too much? Would Ren be able to wait, not knowing if Hux even planned to come back, or would Hux return to find him with both hands stuffed down the front of his trousers? It was an enticing thought, but one for another time, perhaps.


(Another time? Another time? What was he thinking? There wasn't going to be “another time”. He may as well just get to it and get this time over with.)


Hux gave him a wicked grin -- alright, he was going to grin while in bed with Kylo Ren after all, but this was different -- and after making a show of licking his lips, Hux settled his mouth over Ren’s still-covered erection.


Ren lost his battle against staying silent, and Hux had to wonder how many people would believe him if he told them how wantonly Kylo Ren moaned when someone got their mouth on him. Not that he ever would, seeing as that would require admitting that it had been his mouth.


When Hux pulled down his pants and released his cock, it sprung up to smear wet trails across Ren's tunic. Ren had tucked his face into the crook of the elbow he had thrown across it, but Hux could see the vulnerable sweep of his bitten-red lips. He could watch the way they parted on what could have been either a gasp or groan (had it been voiced) when he licked a slow, wandering path from the base to the tip of Ren's erection.


Hux leaned in close enough for Ren to feel the edges of his lips when he spoke.


“Still certain you stand a chance?”


Hux .” The choked reply was a furious, desperate plea.


Hux didn't have it in him to refuse a request placed so nicely and kissed the jut of Ren's hip before swallowing him down.

He was out of practice to be sure, but years of clandestine relations with other cadets didn't just disappear. It was like riding a jumpspeeder: once you figured out how, you never truly forgot.


Hux placed wet kisses up the shaft, laved over the head, and let his fingertips play over Ren's balls. He slipped his tongue between foreskin and tip, looked up at the other man from under his eyelids before sucking hard and releasing with a slick pop.


All the basic tricks, really.


Ren looked like he was about to die.


Hux assumed that Ren would buck, and pressed down hard on Ren's hips with both hands to discourage him from doing so. However, when Ren came, he didn't buck. Instead he curled his hand around the back of Hux’s head, fingers gripping his hair, and did his level best to hold him in place.


Bad etiquette. They would have to discuss that to prevent it from happening again, because this was the last time that would be tolerated.


(Actually, it didn't matter. This wouldn't happen again so it was irrelevant.)


Ren was silent as Hux swallowed around him, mouth open and brows peaked. Eyes screwed shut. When Hux pulled off, Ren gasped like he had just surfaced from being underwater, and his breaths were tinted at the edges with soft moans.


Hux slipped him back into his pants, gave his inner thigh a jocular slap, and crawled back up onto the bed. Hux let himself collapse beside Ren, wiping his mouth and full of self-satisfaction. There wasn't anything quite like making someone else fall apart.

Especially when that someone would not stop goading you and was the most irritating individual you had ever encountered.


“You were right.” Ren said some time later, sounding a bit dazed.


“Of course I was. About what?”


“You're better at that than I am.”


Hux laughed. And after a moment, Ren did too.


Ren sighed as he stepped out of the refresher after cleaning himself up a bit and bent to pick up one of his boots.

“Don't leave.” Hux snapped.


Post-orgasm was perhaps the least guarded state Hux had ever seen the Knight in, and there was something almost endearing in his bewildered expression.


...In a pathetic way, of course.


“I don't want all my soldiers seeing you leaving my room.”


Ren actually raised an eyebrow in a considering sort of way, as though conceding the point, and dropped the boot.

He stripped off all but his lower layers and slipped into Hux’s bed, yawning wide enough for Hux to see his very back teeth. If he wasn't the picture of the post-coital human male stereotype, Hux didn't know who would be.


Kylo Ren cuddled in his sleep.


On the one hand, this was the easiest acquisition of blackmail Hux had ever experienced. On the other, he couldn't breathe . Ren had a grip like a possessive child that didn't want to share their favorite toy. Which, if Hux was Ren's favorite toy (as it were), that would explain rather a lot. Hux launched himself desperately toward the edge of the bed. An undignified combination of squirming and using the bed and the other man for leverage loosened the grip he was held in enough to slip free and escape to that blessedly empty stretch of mattress.


His victory was short lived.

As soon as Ren had -- apparently still asleep -- rolled close enough, Hux was once again being snuggled near to death. He bitterly wondered if banthas were somewhere in Skywalker lineage.


This was going to be a long night.


“You didn't wake me up.”


Hux raised an eyebrow, forgetting that Ren couldn't see him, like this. He had slept terribly, so he figured it was excusable.

Ren persisted, all limbs somehow wrapped around or entangled with Hux, his chest pressed to Hux’s back.


“Does that mean you liked it?”


Hux groaned in exasperation and jabbed an elbow back into Kylo Ren's chest.

But the man was incorrigible. And it almost sounded like he was teasing Hux, smiling against his neck and nosing at the hinge of his jaw. He repeated the question.


“Does that mean you liked it?”


“I preferred it to hearing your voice, which is what would have happened if I threw you off and you awoke.” Hux retorted, though he knew from sad experience that this wasn't true. Kylo Ren slept like the dead.


His arms tightened around Hux. And here he had thought the asphyxiating embraces had come to an end.


“Are you certain that's the reason, General?”

His mouth was right by Hux’s ear; the soldier could feel the warmth of his breath. Ren truly did have a rather nice mouth. He was also using what he imagined a sultry tone was, but had veered into ‘creepy'.

Hux shrugged him off.


“In the name of-- get out of my room!”


“Isn't leaving in the morning more suspicious?”

Ren was grinning as he said it, crooked teeth and naked emotions bared without any hint of self consciousness. But he was getting up, gathering his things.


Hux hurled a boot at him.


He missed.


Maybe it was because of some interference via the Force. Maybe his aim was off because he had just woken up.

But maybe -- just maybe -- he’d never intended to hit Ren in the first place.