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Blue Christmas

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The Doctor took another gulp from his bottle of whiskey well tried to anyway to his disgust he found it to be empty. He was sure it was full only a few moments ago. wobbling slightly he stood up from his large leather chair on the top level of the console room where he spent most of his nights drinking himself into oblivion trying to block out the heart wrenching screams that tore from Clara's chest as the raven hit her and drunkingly staggered his way towards the console with the intention of stopping off at the nearest hyper vodka store and drinking until he blacked out.

Reaching the console he began drunkingly typing in the co-ordinates missing a few of the buttons a few times before getting it right.

"Stop moving the buttons you old cow" The Doctor sneered at the time machine. 

The machine just made a sighing sound in return she had gotten used to his insults and rough handling over the past 13 months. The Doctor was angry at her for not letting him change the events that led to Clara's death and he no longer kept up with the repairs or spoke aloud to her unless it was to condemn her but she still cared for her Timelord and looked after him as best as she could and one of those ways was not letting him drive while drunk.

The TARDIS refused to take off which only made the Doctor angry as he punched and kicked the console shouting and swearing at her to take off. It hurt the TARDIS of course it did but she would take any amount of damage done to her through his temper just to keep him safe.

The Doctor punched the monitor sending it spining around the console. He punched it so hard it spun right round and hit him on the side if his head knocking him to the ground. The last thing he saw before blacking out was the date still set to local earth time. 25th December 2016


"Mummy! Daddy get up! its Christmas!' a small excited voice called from the distance before something big and heavy landed on the Doctor's legs.

"Daddy come on its Christmas!!" The voice shouted again as the heavy thing started jumping up and down.

"Jane no jumping on the bed!" a female voice scolded.

"But its Christmas" The child whinnied

"Still no excuse for jumping on the bed or your father" The woman half heatedly scolded the child again.

The Doctor knew that voice, he dream t about that voice. Fantasized about it. He slowly opened one eye praying to what ever god or deity that was out there that the voice belonged to the one person he wanted more than anything. Laying beside him in what turned out to be a bed was the brown haired round faced wide eyed control freak he had missed so much.

The Doctor launched himself at Clara not even realizing he knocked the heavy thing that was a 5 year old girl off of the bed making her screech with joy and shout "Again! Daddy Again!"

"Your ok! It was a dream all of it the trap street the Raven, Ashildr was just a dream" The Doctor mumbled into Clara's shoulder pulling her into a bone crushing hug.

"Careful Doctor you'll squash the twins" Clara laughed at her husband.

"yes, yes of course" The Doctor apollogised pulling away from Clara and ducking down to kiss her swollen belly

"Sorry twins but you're mummy is just to beautiful to loose, In a few months you'll see for yourself" The Doctor whispered rubbing a hand across Clara's bump earning him two small kicks in return.

"See they agree with me" The Doctor smiled up at Clara who was looking down at him her face filled with love and awe.

Just then a small cry came from the other room disrupting the moment.

"I'll get him you go start breakfast" Clara instructed the Doctor pressing a quick to his lips and padding barefoot down the hall towards there sons room.

"And you madam can help me" The Doctor laughed scooping up a giggling Jane and throwing her over his shoulder.

"But Daddy Presents!" Jane complained

"Mummy says we have to have breakfast first but maybe I'll let you sneak a small one before Mummy comes down" The Doctor whispered making Jane squeal with excitement

"I heard that and No you will not! The presents are all organised to be opened in the right order you will not ruin that" Clara called from their son's room.

"Bossy control freak" the Doctor muttered to quiet for anyone to hear

"You love it" Clara teased. she hadn't heard him but they had been married long enough for her to know what he said when her control freak side came out.

The Doctor chuckled and headed downstairs to the kitchen, Jane still slung over his shoulder. He gently deposited Jane down on the counter top when they arrived in the kitchen.

"So what's it to be for breakfast?" The Doctor asked the giggling five year old

"Chocolate pancakes!!!" She shouted excitedly

"Chocolate pancakes! for breakfast? on Christmas day!" The Doctor faked being cross

"Yes Daddy Chocolate Pancakes are my favourite and last night you said I could have what ever I wanted" Jane reasoned with the Doctor.

The Doctor looked at his daughter with her brown hair and big eyes she looked just like a mini Clara, He couldn't help but fall in love with his daughter even more every time he looked at her especially when she was trying to pout and act cross like she was at the moment she looked like a round faced little kitten.

"I did say that didn't I? And we must never tell lies so I guess. CHOCOLATE PANCAKES FOR BREAKFAST" The Doctor declared loudly.

Jane cheered and started doing a small dance sat on the counter making to Doctor laugh as he reached down everything he needed to make the pancakes with difficulty as most of their counter space was taken up with the food for Christmas dinner later on. He was just finished mixing the batter when there was a knock at the back door. The Doctor answered to find one of his high council men.

"Lord President, Lady Jane" the Council man greeted with a bow.

"Yes, yes what can I do for you Archer" The Doctor answered grumpily he didn't like his family time being disturbed. 

"I was just calling by to say Merry Christmas Sir' Archer replied with a slight smirk as he took in the Doctors attire.

The Doctor Lord President of Gallifrey was dressed in fluffy Christmas pyjamas with reindeer all over then and he had splats of flour and milk on him. The Doctors face went slightly red with embaressment he'd forgotten Clara had made him wear these going to bed so they could be all Christmasy in the morning.

"Archer I hope you're not here to discus work with my husband on Christmas day" Clara said walking into the kitchen with their one year old son Austin on her hip.

"Of course not Lady President, I wouldn't want to face your wrath now would I?" Archer teased

"Good and as I've told you a million times already Archer outside of the high council it's Clara" Clara said placing Austin in his hover chair at the table with a warmed bottle of milk before moving over to the cooker to continue making the pancakes the Doctor had started.

"And as I've told you Lady President your husband has instructed me not too" Archer said with a nervous glance towards the Doctor.

"Oh ignore him he just likes people to think he's big and scary" Clara laughed

"I am big and scary!" The Doctor protested

"In the high council yes but at home we both know who the scary one is" Clara teased kissing the Doctor lightly. The Doctor just shrugged there was no response to that that wasn't a lie, In the high council he was the one who gave the orders and made the plans, She was the one to remind him of his promise and keep him in line.

"The wife never lies sir" Archer smiled "How are you Lady President? you look lovely if I may add"

"No you may not" The Doctor snapped pointing is finger angerly at Archer

"Oh sush you He's married and just being nice" Clara gently scolded her husband. "I'm well thank you Archer, I heard the twins for the first time upstairs"

"You did?" The Doctor asked rushing over to Clara and putting his hands on her bump and closing his eyes, concentrating. There was just a small whisper in his mind followed by another. Two distinct voices whispering to each other. Tears prickled in the corner of his eyes and a lump formed in his throat. This was his twins communicating and it was beautiful. THe first voice was surround in blue and the second in pink. "One of each?" The Doctor asked Clara with a watery smile

"One of each" She answered with a laugh.

"You are very lucky Lord President, I can only wish for the day I get to experience the same joy with my wife" Archer spoke sadly

"It'll happen for you one day Archer never give up hope" Clara encouraged with a smile

"I fear Lady President we are part the unlucky few still cursed" Archer said in remorse with his head bowed "Any way Lady President my wife wanted to know if there was anything she could bring to help? She doesn't want you doing too much in your condition"

"I'm pregnant not dying" Clara rolled her eyes setting pancakes down in front of the children "I've got it all covered don't worry just make sure you show up on time. Are you staying for breakfast?"

"No Lady President I better get back to Bower. I'll leave you to enjoy your breakfast and I'll see you all later. Goodbye Lord President Lady President, Lady Jane, Lord Austin" Archer bowed as he said each name before leaving.

"Oh my stars! I'm am idiot!" Clara exclaimed as soon as Archer had left

"Why what's wrong?" The Doctor asked worried sitting down to eat his stack of pancakes.

"I didn't put the turkey on last night before bed! its never going to be ready in time. I was to busy making a back up dessert I forgot" Clara rambled feeling stressed.

"Back up dessert?" The Doctor asked confused

"I'm gonna make soufflé's but you know me it might not work so I made a trifle just in case but I forgot about the turkey!" Clara rambled in a panic running her hands through her hair getting flour in it.

"Don't panic it's not good for the babies we'll just use the TARDIS an hour in there and it'll come up a treat" The Doctor reassured his paniced wife.

"They'd be able to tell tho won't they? it'll taste different cooked in the time winds" Clara began pacing

"Yes it'll taste different but it won't matter we've never had christmas here on Gallifrey before so they won't know what turkey is ment to taste like" The Doctor pointed out.

"Ok" Clara sighed sitting down suddenly feeling to exhusted to worry anymore "Oh don't forget we've gotta facetime my family later"

"Oh no do we have to? Linda hates me" The Doctor complained

"Yes we do they want to say merry christmas to the children and Linda doesn't hate you, she hates everyone" Clara scolded

"Grandma hates me?" Janes little heartbroken voice spoke up

"Of course not love I ment grown ups she loves you and Austin sweetie" Clara reasured her daughter

"Can we have presents now?" Jane asked her worries completely forgotten

"Sure lets clean your face first though so you don't look all messy in the pictures" Clara laughed picking up the damp cloth and cleaning both childrens faces

"Yey! presents" Jane cheered once she was let down from the table and ran towards their living room waving her arms in the air like a mad woman.

"She's your daughter" Clara laughed in disbelieve at her daughters craziness

"Why is she my daughter when she's like that? why can't she be yours?" The Doctor asked

"We've disgust this you're the one that asks like an over grown 5 year old at times" Clara pointed out

"Oh right yes of course" The Doctor answered as if it was the most obvious thing ever.

The family sat down in the living room around the tree Austin on the Doctors lap and Jane sat with her legs under her bum bouncing up and down with excitement chanting "Presents presents presents" over and over again making both her parents laugh.  True to her word Clara had orginised all the presents in size order and in their proper piles for each person. They each took a turn in opening a present while Clara clicked away with her camera taking pictures as they opened them. 

Jane let out a squeel of delight when she unwrapped a victorian style dolls house packed with furniture and accessories.

"Thought you where going to make it bigger on the inside so she could go in?" Clara whispered to her husband

"I was but couldn't face it. Bad memories" The Doctor whispered back.

An hour later all the presents were opened and the children were playing happily. Jane was thrilled with her dolls house aswell as her baby doll with a buggy and way more Frozen stuff than the Doctor was comfortable with she also got her first Gallifreyan robe that she was proudly parading round in as well as some more sciencey toys the Doctor insisted upon but they were mostly laying to the side ignored in favor of the more fun toys. Austin had got a telepathic mini hover car that had frightened him the first time he sat on it and it moved so now he refused to go anywere near it aswell as a few cuddly toys and some radiation blocks the Doctor swore to Clara was completely safe but his favourite present by far was the talking Bing bunny teddy he had clutched in his hands while sucking on its ears.

Clara's laptop began making a bleeping noise to let them know they had a facetime notification. The Doctor groaned he hated talking to his in laws Gran was great but Dave and especially Linda were a nightmare he'd rather face a legion of Daleks than speak to that woman. Clara opened the laptop and accepted the call. The faces of his inlaws appeared on the screen the Doctor took this as an opportunity to go and sort the turkey out.

"Merry Christmas" Gran and Dave shouted together while Linda just lifted her glass in a greeting.

"Merry Christmas!" Clara laughed "Jane, Austin come say hi" Clara called over her children

"Hi Gran, Granda Dave and Grandma Linda" Jane waved excitedly

"Jane dear I've told you just call me Linda Grandma makes me feel old" Linda instructed in a bored tone

"Sorry Linda" Jane answered sounding alittle deflated.

"What did santa bring you?" Gran asked in a stage whisper which perked Jane right up again

"I gots Elsa! and a dolls house! and look I gots a pretty dress just like mummy and daddy's" Jane answered getting excited again standing back abit from the camera and twirling to show off her robe.

"You look beautiful dear" Dave complimented Jane "Doesn't she Linda?"

"hmm? what? oh yes very pretty Jane" Linda commented her attention on something in the room behind their laptop that Clara and the Children couldn't see.

"What about you Austin what did Santa bring you?" Gran asked

"Ing!" Austin exclamed lifting his bing bunny up into the air a long string of slabbers hanging of it from him sucking on it.

"You really shouldn't let him suck on the Clara dear who knows what sort of germs are on that thing" Linda saud scrunching her face up in disgust

"Bit of germs won't do him a bit of harm hes a growing boy he needs to build his immune system" Gran said pointedly

"You won't be saying that if he ends up in hospital with some foreign illness because of putting things in his mouth from that third world country they live in now" Linda argued

"Linda South Africa is not a third world country" Clara muttered fed up of this same arguement everytime they spoke although it was much better than telling Linda and her Dad where they actually lived, If she told them they lived on another planet called Gallifrey they would have her sectioned thinking she had completely lost her mind. Her Gran of course knew, Her Gran always knew even when Clara had told her everything after Danny died her responce had been "I knew there was something more to him".

Suddenly there was a clatter and bangs from the kitchen followed by the smoke alarm. Clara had never been happier the Doctor had messed something up.

"Sorry guys gotta go the Doctors up to something in the kitchen. bye! love you! kids say bye" Clara said in a cheery rush

"Still using that rediculas name I see" Linda muttered under her breath

The rest of the family said their goodbyes quickly and Clara shut the laptop racing towards the kitchen to find her husband changed into his normal clothes and standing on the kitchen table his sonic aiming at the smoke alarm.

"What on Gallifrey are you doing? get down of my table" Clara scolded

"I thought you might need an excuse to get away from Linda" The Doctor explained getting down of the table as soon as he lowered his sonic the alarm stopped.

"You soniced the alarm to go off?" Clara asked

"Yep" The Doctor answered proudly

"Then what on earth was the clattering and the bang?"

"I fell" He answered sheepishly pointing to the now over turned and slightly broken chair. Clara sighed and rubbed her forehead in frustration it really was like having 3 children most of the time.

"Thank you for saving me but break my furniture again or put your sandy boots on my table just one more time and you're sleeping in the barn" Clara threatened. The Doctor gulped nervously he knew she wasn't above following through with that threat he once spent a week out there during the winter for dragging muddy footprints threw the house.

2 hours later and the Family were gathered in the dinning room which had been modified to fit a table big enough for 12 adults, the Doctor, Clara the 5 other members of the high council and their spouses as well as a smaller round table of to the side for the children to sit.  Clara had laid out the table the night before it had taken her over an hour to get everything exactly right, The cuttilery in the right order and the exact right distance away from each other. The round golden placemats she had engraved with "Merry Christmas" in  red Gallifreyan sitting perfectly straight so they could be read easily. The glasses polished so there wasn't the slightest smudge or dust on them the crystal sparkling in the mid afternoon sun.

"You've really out done yourself Clara" The Doctor praised taking in the large christmas tree in the corner decorated with twinkley lights, ribbons and baubles the Doctor chuckled slightly when he noticed the small model of a Dalek sat ontop of the tree. The rest of the room was decorated with fairylights and garnads making it look like the inside of santas workshop.

The guests all started to arrive and soon everyone was sat round the table eating their christmas dinner with all the trimmings Turkey, ham stuffing, mash potatoes, roast potatoes, carrots and parsnip, brocolli and of course  brussel sprouts with lots of gravy all made and prepared with persise percision by Clara herself.

The Doctor was huddled together with the Lord Chancellor discussing the latest policy change in hushed tones so Clara, who had banned all work talk for the day wouldn't hear them.

"Do you really think its wise to allow the Omegas the same rights as Betta and Alphas?" Lord Chancellor asks

"Of course. Its about time someone allowed them" The Doctor answered in disbelieve that someone could think it wasn't a good idea. "Lady President was very sure on it"

"I know she's your wife Lord President and I don't mean to offend but she was once human do you not think that could be clouding her judgement" Lord Chancellor asks tentivly

"ouch!" The Doctor yelped as Clara clipped him around the back of his head

"I said no work talk and you Lord Chancellor should remember that I may have been human but it was me who saved your life not so long ago my judgement wasn't clouded then was it?" Clara scolded them both before continuing on her way over to check on the children.

With no work to talk about the Doctor soon found himself bored he never knew until today just how dull and boring most of his council were. He was just wishing for something, anything exciting to happen when a bright light flashed in the room leaving behind Missy.

"Ooo look at this a lovely big high council christmas dinner" Missy exclamed "Don't worry to save embaressment I'll just pretend my invite got lost in the mail" She stage whispered behind her hand to the Doctor with an over exaggerated wink before sitting down on the Lord Chancellors knee.

"Lord Master I must insist you remove yourself from my lap" Lord Chancellor demanded

"Lady please. Some of us can afford the upgrade" Missy said flattering her eye lashes while patting her hair and looking the chancellor up and down slowly as if disgusted he was a male.

"Missy get off him and get out" Clara said sounding both bored and angry

"Ooo look its the puppy one!" Missy exclimed almost sounding excited as she jumped off the Chancellor's knee. "oh and the puppy has been mating oh tut tut naughty puppy" Missy pouted wagging her finger at Clara

"Missy leave her alone" The Doctor sighed off all the boredm relievers to appear it just had to be Missy. He was getting a headache all ready.

"Oh she knows I'm only playing don't you puppy" Missy smiled wickedly

"Mummy why does that lady keep calling you a puppy?" Jane asked Clara innocently

"Mummy? oh my my you have been a very naughty Puppy"

"Because Jane she's jealous that Mummy got Daddy and not her" Clara answered Jane staring at Missy with a satisfied smirk on her face.

"You think I'd want to mate with him?" Missy asked screwing her face up in disgust "Oh no no no such messy disgusting bussiness"

"Enough of this Missy just get out" The Doctor demanded standing up from his chair.

Missy looked shocked at his out burst for a moment but quickly recovered throwing him a challenging smirk. "No I think I'll stay right here I'm feeling a bit peckish" Missy said in a flirty tone reaching over and taking a piece of turkey of the Doctors plate being sure to thrust her chest into his face just to annoy Clara.

"Mm lovely turkey cooked in the time winds if im not mistaken" Missy said smacking her lips together. Clara's cheeks going slightly red with embaressment at her reveal

"Right thats it Missy leave right now or so help me I will have you aressted for the many crimes you gave commited over the centurys and have you executed" The Doctor shouted his face slightly red with anger

"Chill out man was just having a little bit of fun but have it your way" Missy said typing co-ordinates into her vortex minipulator "Bye!" She shouted in a high pitched voice as she dissapeared in another flash of light.

Later on that night after everyone had gone home, the dishes had been washed and put away and the family had snuggled up on the sofa together to watch "The Grinch" that Jane gad laughed at and said Daddy was like The Gringe, The four of them where in Janes room. The room was dark with only the only light coming from the pink fairy lights wrapped around the cannopy of Jane's bed casting a soft warm glow over them. Clara was sat on the Rocking chair beside the bed rocking Austin as he suckled on her breast falling into a deep sleep still clutching his bing teddy. The Doctor sat on the edge of the bed reading "The three little Sontaran's" to Jane who was snuggled under the princess duvet.

"And the big bad Judoon went running off with the three little Sontaran's running after him shouting, For the glory of the Sontaran empire! Sontar-Ha Sontar-Ha. The end" The Doctor finished the story placing a kiss on his daughters forehead "Good night my little doodle bug" he whispered

"Good night Daddy" She whispered back her voice full of sleep and her eyes already closed.

The Doctor left the room quietly as Clara laid Austin down in his cot wrapping the blankets tightly around him. Clara kissed each of her children in turn a small smile playing on her lips as she watched them sleep peacefully for a moment before leaving the room.

"Time for your reward for all you hard work today" The Doctor whispered in Clara's ear pressing his front up against her back as he placed his hands on her hips pulling her closer towards him and kissing up her neck to just below her ear. Clara turned in his arms so she could capture his lips with hers. The Doctor pulled Clara into their bedroom their lips not once lossing contact his hands remaining on her hips.

Once he had closed and locked the door The Doctor let his hands roam over Clara's bum down over the back of her thighs to the edge of her dress pulling the dress over her head slowly savoring the feel of each inch of exposed flesh. The soft skin on her thighs, the silkyness of her underwear over the tight skin of her stomach that was growing and carrying his children. The Doctor bent down and placed a lingering kiss on her bump before quickly pulling the dress the rest of the way off. His mouth crashing to hers as soon as the dress was out of the way and thrown across the room neither caring where it ended up. The Doctor ran his hands up from Clara's hips up her sides and under her bra to cup her breasts rolling and rubbing Clara's nipples until she moaned into his mouth.

After the duo laid in bed bare and spent from 3 rounds of love making. The Doctor with his head between Clara's breast listening to her two hearts beating heavly as they came down from their high. Clara's fingers running through the Doctors hair damp with sweat.

"Thank you Clara you have given me the perfect christmas" The Doctor said sleepily placing a small kiss on the side if Clara's breast.

"You're welcome Doctor" Clara said reaching down to kiss the top of the Doctors head

"I love you Mrs Oswald" The Doctor smiled lifting his head to look up at Clara

"I love you too Mr Oswald" Clara giggled.

The Doctor kissed Clara lightly on the lips before resting his head back down and allowing him self to fall asleep to the sound of Clara's heart beat feeling like it was the most precious sound in the universe.

The Doctor slowly opened his eye's they felt heavy and gritty and he squintted them against a light that was shinning in his face, bringing up his hand to block the light out wincing and flinching when it brushed against the egg size bump on his head. That's when the Doctor realised he wasn't laying curled up to Clara in bed instead he was laying on the cold hard floor of the TARDIS. It had all been a dream, Christmas, Clara, the children all of it just a dream and in that moment the Doctor had never felt more broken and alone as he sat himself up leaning against the console and just cried into his hands.