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The Skippus Alphabet

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Mark feels like he has been living in a constant rush of adrenaline for most of the past months.

Completely coming to terms with the situation they have been in with Tom. For the first time saying out loud what he has been thinking about for months.

Making it official, coming out with the truth about their shitty situation and secretly fearing for terrible reactions from various sides.

It’s been some of the most stress Mark has had in quite a while, but seriously, it’s been so worth it.

The first time in ages he's playing a song with friends, one of their songs. The first time he feels their music again, feels this is what he needs to do, this is where he belongs. He hasn’t been playing these notes in months, it feels so good to be here with Travis and Matt and to do what has always been the most important thing in the world to him. The feeling he gets when he sings his old familiar lyrics again. And then when he hears Matt join in and harmonize and Mark feels like he should’ve taken this step years ago already.

The first time they play in front of fans again and Mark feels like throwing up and floating away in awe at the same time. The first time he hears them cheer for them, that first note that makes the fans all go crazy for them.

It’s almost like he’s a kid again, fuck, the feeling is too good.

That exciting rush of the first kiss. Mark hadn’t thought he’d first-kiss anyone ever again, but just as all good things in life, that first kiss comes unexpected. Matt tastes like chewing gum, a reasonable amount of alcohol and just a touch of Chapstick. He smells like apple shampoo and Mark doesn’t ever wanna stop moving his lips against Matt’s. It’s so addictive.

Mark actually wonders how much goddamn adrenaline a body can produce before it decides you’ve had enough and knocks you the fuck out.

The first time Matt takes him on a ride on his motorcycle Mark thinks he’s reached that point, and he’s already waiting to blackout. But he quickly learns to enjoy this feeling.

He feels the wind against his face, his arms are pulled tightly around Matt’s middle and instead of waiting for his end Mark feels alive for once. He feels so goddamn alive, he thinks he hasn’t felt like this in years.

It all comes back to his mind in that one moment, all of it, their gigs, their music, his band, his Matt.

He feels like his heart is pumping pure adrenaline through his veins.

He feels so goddamn alive and he doesn’t ever want the rush to end.