Actions

Work Header

Stoned

Work Text:

"What day is it?" Sam murmured as she rolled over onto her side, just barely managing to not roll off the couch.

"What month is it?" Daniel asked from on the floor next to the couch.

"Hell, I don't even know what year it is," Cameron called from his spot underneath the table across the room.

"Clearly, your calendar is inferior," Vala commented, her head pillowed on Daniel's stomach.

"Inferior to what?" Daniel asked, trying and failing to peer down at her.

"Mine," she replied with a slight laugh.

"You have your own calendar?" Carter asked curiously. "I want my own calendar."

"A Carter Calendar. A Cartendar!" Mitchell responded with a gleeful cry before bursting into laughter at himself. Sam snorted as she burst into giggles, which earned her laughter from both Daniel and Vala.

Watching through the one-way window, Jack crossed his arms and glanced at Teal'c. "They've been this way since you guys got back from P2X-939?"

"Indeed," he responded.

"Vala was the first to show signs, acting a little strange," Dr. Lam added. "But I think we all just figured she was simply being Vala. When Carter started giggling uncontrollably, we knew something was wrong."

"And there are no other symptoms?" Jack asked.

"Other than the fact that they're all acting stoned, no."

"What do you think caused it? And how long will it last?"

"DanielJackson and ValaMalDoran opened a chest that I believe contained some sort of chemical," Teal'c replied. "Perhaps as a way of preventing anyone from stealing the items in the chest."

"Because they'd get high and not get very far?"

"That is correct."

"And you think your Tretonin protected you?" Jack asked, still half-watching the antics of the SGC's most elite team.

Teal'c nodded almost imperceptibly. "It is the only logical conclusion."

"General, I believe SG-1 is already showing signs that the effects of this drug are lessening," Dr. Lam said in reply to his earlier question. "Vala is already starting to sober up, for lack of a better term."

"You still don't know what this drug was?"

"It's nothing we've seen before, sir. Our initial analysis doesn't seem to indicate any life threatening effects, and no one else has shown any symptoms, so I don't think that what's affecting them is contageous. I believe they will eventually return to normal. It's just a matter of time."

"So until then..." he asked, gesturing towards the room.

"It seemed like the most logical solution. They're not sick, but we didn't want to risk exposing anyone else before we knew what was getting them sick, and well, sir, they seem to be enjoying themselves," she added, a small grin flitting across her face. "Based on Vala's recovery, I don't think they'll be in there more than a few days."

Jack nodded slowly. "Cameras on?" he asked, gesturing towards the room where Vala had stolen Daniel's glasses and was peering at Sam through them, who was giggling again.

"Standard procedure," Dr. Lam responded with a nod.

"Do you think that the tapes will reveal any useful information, O'Neill?" Teal'c asked curiously, one eyebrow raised.

"Nope," he replied.

Both Dr. Lam and Teal'c peered curiously at him.

"Oh come on," he finally added. "I want to be there when they watch this tape, don't you, Teal'c? Carter just loves to be reminded of the fact that she giggles. And I bet there's all sorts of other stuff that we haven't even seen yet."

"Perhaps we could hold a movie night before you must depart," Teal'c responded.

"Now that's what I'm talking about!" Jack cried, clapping Teal'c on the shoulder.