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Derek didn’t mean to get so drunk. Okay, maybe he did. He’d never been shitfaced before and Stiles left his special Wolfsbane and mistletoe alcohol at the loft and it just called to Derek. It begged him to get more than buzzed. It begged him to push what he was comfortable with in the means of exploration. He’d never been drunk. He didn’t know he’d ever get drunk as a born werewolf. Stiles said it was fun unless you took it too far. The last pack night they’d had, they all got buzzed before Derek cut them off but no one took the alcohol after they got sober and went home. It was in Derek’s pantry waiting for a special occasion. Or for a curious alpha to try it out. Derek tried to go slow. He really did try. But it did feel good, he was all floaty and happy and horny. And that made him want Stiles.

He also didn’t have any judgmental capabilities when he was drunk. So when he picked up his phone to text Stiles, no part of his brain thought it might be a bad idea.

‘dude. im so drunk’

‘Derek, this is John, Stiles’s father and the Sheriff. How can you be drunk anyway?’

‘I can’t wait to hve my cock in ur perfect ass, babe’ Stiles loved being called babe.

‘Still the Sheriff, Derek.’

‘can’t wait to knot u again stiles, make you scream 4 it’ Derek hoped that would get the boy to his loft.

‘I’m calling Parrish.’

‘hes with lyds. y wud he want in?’ Derek was thoroughly confused now.

‘To help you sober up.’ Derek frowned.

‘u said u liked drunk sex. how bout drunk sex wit me?’ He offered.


“STILES!” His dad shouted. He didn’t shout a lot nowadays, so Stiles raced downstairs. He held his phone out to his son in disgust. “Your alpha is drunk, even though I’m not sure how a werewolf even gets drunk. He’s trying to reach you. And since when did you have sex?” Stiles took it, laughing as he read the exchange.

“Um, I made a mistletoe and Wolfsbane whiskey and one with wine-we did a poll and the super naturals were split on what they’d drink so Lydia and I went to Deaton and made two brews. It delays their healing enough that the alcohol can affect them. He used it to get drunk and probably meant to text me not you, we’re right after each other in his contacts. And the sex thing was a while ago but I didn’t want to tell you right then and by now I thought you knew. It was back when Scott, Jackson, and I took Danny out to get his mind of his ex. Danny and I got drunk and hooked up a few times then I hooked up with Caitlin and now I know I’m bi.” Stiles shrugged but didn’t look at his dad.

“While I don’t love that you drink underage, you know I don’t care that you’re bi, right? I just want to know you’re being safe while you’re out there. Are you and Derek, together?” His dad didn’t know how to ask it and he tried not to make a face.

“Yeah but the pack doesn’t know right now so that is top secret information. And he can’t catch anything and I’m clean, I got tested after Caitlin. I knew Danny was clean. Even if he didn’t insist on using a condom nothing would happen to me.” Stiles looked at his dad.

“I did not need to hear that part, but I’m glad you told me you were, out there.”

‘i’m serious, get ur ass here and get drunk so we cn fuck. i want ur body under me, now.’

“This is gold. I’ll go get him sober after I screen cap this.”

“If you chose not to sober him up, make sure you feed him and don’t get too drunk yourself. That much honesty upfront gives you a night of leeway.” His dad squeezed his shoulder, and took his phone after Stiles got what he wanted.

“Can you pretend that never happened?” Stiles looked at him.

“What happened?” His dad grinned, and Stiles grabbed his keys.

That was some of the best sex either of them had ever had, and as promised Derek got Stiles screaming in ecstasy.
Then when he was sober Stiles showed him the texts. He didn’t think it was nearly as funny as Stiles did. He just hung his head in shame and sent a fruit basket to the sheriff with a note that read ‘Sorry – Derek.’