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    Summary

    Michael escapes Hell but Hell follows. Slowly getting his memory and strength back he has to make many difficult decisions.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    18,284
    Chapters:
    9/?
    Comments:
    67
    Kudos:
    64
    Bookmarks:
    11
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    1004
  2. 03 Jul 2018

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  3. 27 Apr 2018

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  4. 24 Mar 2018

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  5. 12 Feb 2018

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  6. 26 Sep 2017

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  7. 02 Jul 2017

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  8. 03 May 2017

    Rec

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    Michael's... I suppose, quite, /lost/ it. She has dissociated with, disconnected from and is out of touch with reality, sees without comprehending, amnesiac and broken. She has squeezed herself so small and tight to fit through the holes and gaps in the Cage and escape, she can now fit in a regular vessel. Gabriel is alive, he doesn't understand what Michael is doing but checks up on her periodically. She's hanging out with the Leviathans, they're suprisingly decent, they make good company if a bit unfortunate of appetite.
    .
    “I’ve always loved monsters.”
    Should it been said by any other, in any other tone, Dick would die laughing. It doesn’t sound like a joke, delusion or indulgence. It’s not naïve. It’s just so… her. Resignation. And condemnation. Punishing, blinding indiscriminate forgiveness. Dick suddenly finds himself wishing to rip her head off, for the first time in eternity feeling something akin to fear stirring in depths of his memory. ‘Love’ is always bad news.
    “Monsters bite,” he reminds her. “Every single one of them. And you what, want to caress them?” it’s supposed to be a mockery. For his own peace of mind.
    “I shared the cage with a monster. I loved him very much,” she stares at her hands and Dick knows exactly what she sees. Blood.
    The memory he swallowed resurfaces and hits him mercilessly and he isn’t sorry to say: “Then you’re well aware that he didn’t love you back,” there was only pain between her and her cellmate, so much needless pain, that she could have avoided if she didn’t love monsters, if she couldn’t afford loving them.
    She runs her fingers down the cold window glass, tangling pale sunrays in her palm, desperate for light that can’t reach into her cold darkness. “I failed him,” she says instead of denying or confirming.
    “Or, he made you believe you did,” they, monsters, can be very convincing. It’s easy, when everyone is a victim and everyone is to blame, when innocence is but a lie. She heard him, but her words are always out of place.
    “I failed you too,” her voice sounds strange, too quiet and too loud at the same time, both deep and high-pitched, words are spoken in old language and hold no remorse. Much like in their first meeting in the heavy rain. Whatever makes her think that. Whatever makes him want to hurt her so much. Just, whatever. He closes his eyes and feels her thin fingers briefly touching his, leaving tiny burning shreds of sun on his skin.
    .
    He scans Castiel’s memory again. Michael. Another archangel. Prince of Heaven. Reserved warrior. Ruthless. Fearsome. It hardly connects with an image of that lost broken thing he found in the rain, which has to be that Michael, for the lack of other options. So, she was an angel after all. She looked closer to Hell that day. She still does.
    I shared the cage with a monster. I loved him very much.
    Lucifer was that monster.
    But it’s not the only thing that makes sense now. Dick’s own knowledge resurfaces from eons of dust, blood and heavy rain of Purgatory.
    Michael. Of course. Who else could tear sun in their hands like it’s nothing? She, or he, or it, didn’t have any name back then. The world was blissfully mute and wordless. And then this little ugly angel sang a song and ruined everything.
    Dick isn’t surprised at all, somewhere beneath the shields of his flesh he knew it. Knew her. They are familiar with each other so intimately as wound and knife, as poison and bloodstream.
    I’ve always loved monsters.
    His worst nightmare. Or it would be if made a habit out of dreaming, which he luckily didn’t. It was… defeating. And the taste of defeat, while sobering, is way too bitter.
    I failed you too.
    ‘Failed’, the word is too strong and too weak to describe anything. They failed themselves, they both lost. It’s just that one of them managed to escape the prison. Only to get stuck in another much worse. Yes, she escaped that too, but the price was dire. How soon the wounded bird will land into a cage again?
    .
    “What are you playing at?! What do you hope to get from him?”
    Interesting question. Dick brought her along out of mere curiosity. It’s not that he particularly likes having her around, but he got used to her presence. Any actual purpose? No. One day she’d go on one of her quest walks and wouldn’t come back. That’s it. And now, knowing that he gave a shelter to the archangel, his mortal enemy who is also in rather helpless state?

  9. 21 Nov 2016

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  10. 25 Jul 2016

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  11. 10 Jan 2016

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